Beautiful Feet

When perspective changes everything...

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Mon, 01 Sep 2014 15:35:00 +0000

A few of you have mentioned it's been a while since I've written anything. The truth is that I haven't known where to begin or how to articulate all that's been floating around in my discombobulated, mixed-up, "home"sick mind. It's been two months since our return to the US, but in many ways it feels as if we've been back for much longer, or even as if we never left. This feeling is disconcerting, because in turn it makes Africa feel like years ago, even another lifetime. Hate that.

Since our return, we've worked through many different experiences and stressors. We experienced reverse-culture shock as daily we met up with friends and family who we hadn't seen for 2 plus years. In addition, we felt the stress of a MUCH more hectic pace than we were accustomed to. All the "new" things (electronics, foods, restaurants, stores) added to the overwhelmed feelings we experienced. Many of those feelings have subsided now as we have said all of our hellos and have settled back into the less stressful environment of our own home. We are so grateful to the Lord for a home to return to.

Now that we're coming out of that initial overwhelming time of arriving and settling in, the grief and loss of our life in Namibia is really hitting. In the time we were traveling home and just arriving, things were so crazy and hectic, it was easier to put those emotions on the back burner because we had so many pressing issues to deal with at the moment.

The sadness and the grief runs deep, especially as I deal with missing our boys. They are always on my mind, and sometimes I am at a loss for how to deal with the grief that I feel. I cry very easily, a song or thought sends me into tears in a moment. When I check the weather on my iPhone, if Otjiwarongo's current forecast comes up and I see that it's dark and cold there, I feel a pit in my stomach and wonder where they are and what they're doing. Are they gathered around the fire keeping warm? Are they finding food? Are they missing us? How are they coping with that grief? Sundays are the worst, I'd give anything to have them all here gathered around my table enjoying a good meal. I feel sick when I must throw away leftovers, desperate to find someone to share them with.

It is so hard to respond when kind, well-meaning friends ask us how we are adjusting or better yet, "Are we all adjusted now?" I don't think I'll ever be adjusted. And honestly, I don't want to be. When we were in Africa, there were so many things we missed so desperately. For me, the thing I missed the most were things to do, places to go. Since our return, we've been blessed with all kinds of wonderful adventures…boating and tubing on the lake, weekends up north, farmer's markets, movie theaters, restaurants with GOOD tasting food, and the list goes on; all the things we'd been dreaming of. But now, though I enjoy these experiences immensely, my "experience" is different. Everything I see and do and hear is filtered through this new perspective. In the back of my mind is always the knowing that they are still there. The boys are still there. The location is still there. Our friends are still there. And this has changed everything for me.

For Geoff and I, one of our greatest fears is settling back into this "American Dream" lifestyle. Though our time in Namibia was incredibly difficult spiritually and emotionally, we were forced to rely on the Lord for our daily bread. We lived on Him. He sustained us one day at a time. We knew we were there for a purpose and we had opportunities to live out that purpose every day. We pray for that kind of life here in the US too, though it will much more difficult to cultivate. In Namibia, it just came naturally (smile).

With God's grace, we move forward one day at a time, trusting in His plan for our lives here. We know he brought us back to the US for a purpose, but we have yet to discover his plan for Geoff and I here. The kids are doing well and enjoying all the people and opportunities they've missed. When we see their happiness, we know we've done the right thing for our family, though our hearts ache at what we've left behind. Our hearts are still in Africa, and we trust that if it is God's will, He will bring us back there when the time is right. We must be fully surrendered to Him. It is up to him where he will use us, and we must be fully available to serve him whole-heartedly in whatever place he chooses. We've experienced the joy of serving him obediently where he leads, even to the hard places, the hot, dusty, and often dark places. But oh the joy of being where He's placed you. It is rarely easy, but it's always good.

Coming Home

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Wed, 23 Jul 2014 14:38:00 +0000

This Saturday will mark four weeks since we walked through those doors at the airport and were surprised by the screams and hugs of many friends and family. What a feeling that was! After almost twenty-four hours of travel, we were exhausted but elated. My family was able to meet Esther face-to-face for the first time and the kids (and G and I) were able to hug their cousin and best friends who they'd missed so much. What had begun as a major headache with our luggage, ended up being a blessing in disguise. All sixteen pieces of luggage were somewhere between London and Chicago, not in Minneapolis. We didn't actually get our luggage for another week, but because of the "inconvenience", the airline gave us each a nice amount of cash to get what we needed. We spent hours at Target on Monday, stocking up on new wardrobes…and shortly after that the reverse-culture shock began to show its face.

The first few days were a piece of cake. We all found ourselves thinking, "This is nothing, we'll be fine." Yes, grocery stores were insane (Geoff had to take a photo of the cereal aisle at CUB to send to our friends in Namibia) and the sheer amount of stuff in Walmart made us literally laugh out loud. I kept thinking that the amount of stuff we were seeing in Walmart was more than the merchandise of every store we'd been in combined during our entire time in Namibia. Funny thing is, it had always been that way, only now I was noticing it.

We'd grown accustomed to about five cereals to choose from. Look at this!

A late night emergency stop at Walmart for underwear and PJ's, on our way home from airport.

Since we were staying at my mom's house in Wisconsin, it quickly became clear we were going to be spending a lot of time in the car. The kids were ready to see friends and cousins ASAP. We also had various doctor's appointments, interviews, and other things that required we be in Stillwater or Woodbury nearly every day. The running around and driving to and from caused my anxiety level to increase a lot. Though it was how I lived all my days before going to Africa, that experience of rushing here and there was not something I was accustomed to anymore and I was feeling it big-time.

Esther showing her patriotism as one of America's newest citizens!

Celebrating the 4th of July on the lake

We knew that each of us would experience re-entry stress in different ways and at different times, just as we all experienced culture-shock differently. Overall, the boys say they feel fine. Sophia and I have struggled with feeling overwhelmed on many occasions, and I would say for me, my greatest "symptom" is just a general underlying anxiety that is very hard to articulate or explain. One day I had my hair done and cried the entire way home because I didn't like it. Never done that before. As we look ahead to getting jobs, moving back into our house, and starting up homeschooling this fall, these things make me anxious. They overwhelm. Maybe anyone would be overwhelmed at that, maybe it's re-entry stress. It's hard to distinguish sometimes.

Sophia and I, in particular, have been nostalgic at times about Namibia and our relationships there. I have missed the boys terribly, from the moment we left Otjiwarongo. I was so anxious to get here so that we could Skype with them, which we have done on two occasions. It was wonderful to see their faces and hear their voices, though the connection wasn't the best, making the communication a challenge (communication with them is always a challenge). One thing we could hear clearly was, "We miss you" and "We love you too", which of course had me in tears for a while. Their first care package is now on the way. I find myself looking through all of my photos of them and wishing I'd taken more. I dream about them almost nightly.

We've been incredibly blessed by the warm welcome we've received from so many friends and supporters. It is quite a strange experience to be greeted by people who've followed our whole journey through Beautiful Feet. I guess it is one thing to be in Africa sharing my life through my keyboard to unknown faces, and another to meet those readers face-to-face and realize they know us, our story, the joys and sorrows of our past two years. It is both humbling and disconcerting at times. I feel so grateful to the many who have cared to follow our journey, and a bit vulnerable too, after all that I've shared. Again, one of those hard-to-articulate things.

Esther getting to know Grandma Swanson and the rest of her family. So fun!

Lunch after church with the Winters! Just like old times (except all of the kids are bigger).

We are so thankful for many of you whom we know have been praying for us! Can we ask for continued prayer for the following….

For peace and direction as Geoff and I both seek employment. That we could trust God fully and be reminded that our value is NOT in our job title, but our identity is in Christ!

That we could experience God's comfort as we continue to adjust to the demands of life in the US, for emotional and spiritual health for each of us.

That the move back into our home will go smoothly and that we will be able to "freshen up" our house before moving back in.

For intimacy with the Lord

Thank you dear friends for loving us and praying for us!

Last Weeks…A photo journal

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 08 Jun 2014 19:33:00 +0000

It's been just over two weeks since we found out we would be leaving Namibia…soon. Since then things have been a bit hectic, but thankfully we've accomplished a lot. We've sold most of our belongings, including our van. That's a huge praise. Tonight is our last night in our home, and that is what it has been, not just a 'house' but home. Tomorrow all of our furniture, curtains, bedding, and pots and pans will be picked up by those who purchased them, so our house will be empty. Therefore, we will be sleeping the next few nights at NAMTI (Terry, Shawna, Dave and Melissa: where you all stayed) before leaving Otjiwarongo on Thursday morning.

Over the past couple weeks I've been trying to take photos of many of the 'lasts', so I hope you don't mind photos because I've got a lot of them…

Last night out with our dear Swedish/Namibian friends Anna and Francois. Man, have these guys been a blessing to us! It will be hard to say goodbye.

Last Soccer Saturday

Treasured friends Rivaldo, Pierro, and Wayne

Last time cramming dozens of boys into our van. Now that makes me sad…

Last braai with friends at our house

First (and last) garage sale in Africa. Notice the highchair model. And no, she does NOT come with the chair.

Last braai with our wonderful neighbors, the Jacobs. Geoff observing braai-master Walter.

Last Sunday at our church. With my sweet Godlieb. We were really blessed last week when our pastor shared with the church about our upcoming departure. He challenged the congregation to continue the work we'd begun in the lives of the boys. He called our 'family' up before the church, including the boys and they prayed over us all. It was really touching (and emotional).

A special lunch together at the Crocodile Farm after church.

Just have to stick this one in of our little nugget in her African head wrap.

Saying goodbye to some of our most special friends at the center. We've spent a lot of Tuesdays there over the past two years.

The cooks at the center

Our last time at our house with the boys. As soon as they arrived I said we were going to take some photos together. I threatened them with, "No smiles, no chili" and I think it worked.

We've continued to talk with the boys about the services we are putting in place for them after we are gone. We've been so blessed to have people committing to helping them in any way they can after our departure. We all know it won't be the same as us being here, but the fact that there are friends stepping up and wanting to play a part in their lives is a testament to God's faithfulness to us and to the boys. So far, we and the boys have tried to stay pretty positive. I am reminding them that we expect to be Skyping soon and that I will get busy putting together their first care package as soon as we get to the US.

Dividing up their favorite cars. There was a lot of excitement last night as Davis and Henry shared their toy guns, baseball caps, and clothes with the boys.

Since we don't have any tables or chairs left, we made the most of the situation and ate our chili and garlic toast together on the kitchen floor.

I have no means of containing this child, thus the 'Daddy-leg-lock'.

Sparklers before heading home. I love all of the too-big (Davis-sized) baseball caps.

Today another fabulous braai with friends.

Our gracious hosts, Nerrine and Chris. Love these guys. Their son Sheldon has been Davis' and Henry's daily companion, literally!

Where the boys hang out…with friends Sheldon, Junior, and Cameron (feet only).

Friends Chloe with daughter Flo, and Thersia with daughter JoJo

Our friends Ivandia and Ignatius and their family. We spent some time tonight talking and praying about how they might reach out to the boys in our absence and keep them connected to the church..and the LORD. Very thankful for these friends, their love and their support.

Of course the next three days are going to be filled with the most difficult goodbyes. We know many of you have been praying for us and we are SO grateful. If I could share a few prayer requests for the coming days…

1. We say goodbye to Carl tomorrow. He is going to a great lady who works with our vet. She is a wonderful TOTAL dog-lover, so much that she already has six dogs! We were very concerned about this, but Carl has been having play dates with his new brothers and sister and he's done amazingly well. Again, thank you Lord. We really care about our dogs and Carl's well-being is very important to us.

2. Over the next two days we will say many hard goodbyes. We are planning to say our final goodbye to the boys Tuesday. We are also going to meet with them and Ignatius that afternoon to talk about how he can connect with them in the future. Pray the Lord would comfort the boys and that they would not feel despair or hopelessness, that the Holy Spirit would instead fill them with HOPE. Pray especially for Godlieb.

3. Please pray for our family's health, especially Sophia and Esther. There is a lot of sickness going around here and Sophia's been struggling for weeks. Esther's had a cold. Pray that by the time we are flying (June 16) everyone will be in tip-top shape.

4. We praise God for a good and peaceful meeting with Esther's birth mom this past week. We all said our goodbyes and it went very smoothly. If the Lord brings us to your mind, please pray for her too.

Thank you friends. Your prayers mean so much to us.

A Letter to my Boys

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Tue, 20 May 2014 20:53:00 +0000

To our boys…

When God spoke to my heart that sad fall day, I was grieving a loss of a dream. But my loving Father spoke through that sadness and whispered quietly to my heart, "I am calling you out." I didn't have to wonder or ask Him again, "Was that him?" I knew. He had been working on me for months, even years, preparing me for that day. He was calling me out, to the least of these. Where He would take me, I had no idea then. To whom He would take me, I could not imagine. I certainly never expected his plans included falling head over heels in love with a group of dusty preteen boys who spent their days at the dumpsite, killing deadly snakes with rocks, and tearing the heads off birds. If God had told me that was his plan, I probably would have said, "Lord, I think you must be mistaken. Surely, that is not what you have in mind for us. That sounds difficult and not at all pretty." But God in his infinite wisdom, knew exactly what he was doing. He knew you needed us, and that we needed you.

The first time you landed at our gate you came in and played cars on the floor. You were so dirty, your clothes tattered and torn. I knew right then that God had brought us here for you. I was so overcome with emotion, I had to go outside to keep it together. Right then and there, God planted a deep, consuming love in my heart for you. As time went by, you quickly became more and more at home in our home. We saw you most days and slowly got to know each other better, though rarely was conversation the means, rather it was just time spent together in each other's presence, you just being you and us just being us.

We soon discovered that we couldn't expect any show of emotion or affection from you. You were not accustomed to that. You'd experienced so little of it yourselves, to expect that from you was asking for the impossible. But it was ok with me. I didn't love on you to get love in return. I couldn't help myself. You see it was the love of the Father, planted in me and overflowing onto you. But somewhere along the way, you all began to soften. We began to see your smiles, hear your laughter, and even make eye contact on occasion.

Boys, living life with you and being allowed in to witness your pain and sorrows, it did something to me. I am changed because you allowed me in. Tiba and Fritz, bringing you home at night to a shack where you were locked out. Looking for your mom at the shebeens so that we could find the key to let you in. Tiba, the first time you cried I thought my heart would break in two. I will always remember climbing in the back seat of the Kombi and holding you in my arms as you cried. I cried too. I wanted to take away your pain, but I couldn't. After that, there were so many nights we struggled to find a warm, safe place for you to sleep. I will always remember the nights you'd be standing at the gate, your face so downcast, telling me you had nowhere to go because your mother had locked you out again while she remained gone all night drinking. I remember the night Geoff broke the lock and bought you a new one, so that you and Fritz would now have your own key. We huddled together in your dark shack and prayed and cried.

Godlieb (God's love), my boy. My heart ached for you, the way you were totally on your own. The day you fell off the swings and suffered a concussion, then walked the long way to our home to be cared for. I felt a mother's fierce love for you. I brought you in and tucked you into bed where you recovered for the next three days. I remember sitting by your bedside and stroking your head. Tears ran down your cheeks but you couldn't tell me what you were feeling. I think I knew. I am so sorry you hadn't received the love and care you deserved. Many months later, after you'd been missing school for weeks and sleeping at a different place every night, we felt we had to find you and bring you home, so we did. We found you at the dumpsite and brought you home, where you stayed with us for the next ten weeks. We don't regret that time, though in the end it was so painful to realize that it couldn't last forever. As you often told us, you were "a location boy". It was hard for you to fit into a family that functioned in a way totally unfamiliar to you. Certainly you were going through your own culture shock in our home. Two things I believe you came to know while in our home…God loved you and we loved you. I pray you can understand why things turned out as they did. I think you do. And I know that you know how much we love you. We are so glad that you have continued to come and be with us, even without the other boys. I love it when you show up for dinner, go for a bike ride, and wrestle with Carl. God answered our prayers in keeping our relationship open, trusting, and full of love.

As time moved on, we began to see changes in you all, BIG changes. For one you became "school boys" and how sharp you all looked in your new uniforms and haircuts. You've made us so proud and it has been our joy to pay you for those B's on your report cards! In addition to becoming school boys, you've become boys with manners. It warms my heart every time I get a "thank you Auntie" as you bring your dishes to the sink after dinner. And the hugs and affection, what a gift. I could fill page after page of sweet and sometimes painful memories of our times together (the movie in Windhoek, the Cheetah center, crocodile farm, and milkshakes at Wimpy just to name a few). Oh and let's not forget the time Geoff was called to the jail to pick up his "son" (Sametime). I know that Geoff and I will never be able to hear "Whoopsie-daisy", "Happy", "On Top of the World", or "Wakawaka" again without thinking of you and remembering our drives through the location, arms hanging out the windows, dust in our eyes, and voices singing.

But boys, there is one thing you must know and no matter what we've given you, if you haven't learned this, we have failed…God loves each of you with an unending love. We've told you this many times and I pray that you've experienced it through our love for you. The day you prayed in Damara to make Jesus the Lord of your life was one of the happiest moments of mine. We were overjoyed at the privilege of baptizing you. Know that we will never stop praying for you all, that God will be Lord over your life and that one day we will all be together in that perfect city that we've talked about, where there will be no more pain or suffering, only peace and joy and love. Until then, use the gifts that he has given you to make the most of your lives. Don't waste his gifts, don't waste your lives.

Talking today about our upcoming departure was so painful. The tears and the sniffles told us you were hurting too. But our leaving is not the end of this story. God has knit our hearts together and He will continue to carry out his plan for you and for us. You have changed our lives forever, for the better. You boys are precious gifts and in my heart you will always be my boys. Oh, how our Heavenly Father cares for you and oh, how we do too.

Thinking about this...

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Mon, 05 May 2014 13:16:00 +0000

Today is a Namibian holiday, which means last night was a night to party, which means I was awoken in the night by lots of noise and voices at who knows what time. Anyhooo...as I was laying awake thinking about all the things that run through your mind at who-knows-what-time-in-the-morning, I got to thinking about what I'm most looking forward to when we get home. I've already shared about a few of the many things that I know I am going to miss. One of them just walked out my door, but I won't go there now.

So, in the middle of the night, do you know what I was dreaming about? I was dreaming of....

fountain pop with ice
buttered popcorn at the movie theatre
Starbucks
Cool Whip
being able to find inexpensive clothes that don't fall apart after one wash, aka Target
church
parks
dinner with friends and family
Fireworks/4th of July/potlucks (hope we can be there)
a vehicle with air conditioning, whose windows go down and doors have handles
Yankee Candles (weird, I know)
bookstores
baby stuff for about a third of the cost
seasons...apple orchards, pumpkin patches, snow (never thought I'd say that!)
McDonald's breakfast sandwiches
pizza
activities for my kids
American underwear!

I realize the majority of my "misses" are food related. I can't deny it. Thanks for allowing me to share my random thoughts for the day. And speaking of longing for a vehicle that works, Henry was asked to write a descriptive paragraph describing our family car for school today. I thought he summed it up pretty well. The only thing he left out of his descriptive writing is the smell in the Kombi after hauling twenty-five boys on a soccer Saturday...

Baptism Day

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Wed, 16 Apr 2014 12:35:00 +0000

Hey everyone. Sorry, it's been a while. We have some exciting things to share. Sunday we spent the afternoon with the boys, as we often do. After lunch, we talked some more about salvation and really tried to get a feel for their level of understanding. A month or so ago they had expressed interest in being baptized. Geoff found a good children's video clip on YouTube that helped to illustrate the A,B,C's of salvation and another that talked about baptism. We also had Roberto on hand to help with translation, because we're never sure of how much is getting lost. Though they are young men of VERY few words, we felt confident of their basic level of understanding and their desire to be baptized. I asked if they'd like to pray together, which they wanted to do. I prayed, Roberto translated in Damara, and the boys prayed together aloud in their language. Let me tell you, that was one of the sweetest sounds I've ever heard!

Yesterday was the big day. We were thrilled to have two of the boys' past teachers join us, as well as our friend Monica who runs the multipurpose center. The boys brought an older brother and two friends along, and Malcolm, Roberto, and Heidi also joined us, making for about 20 in attendance! We were able to use a friends' pool for the baptism and then celebrated with cake and ice cream at our house following.

Geoff shared a bit with everyone before the baptism. Martha (below) helped to translate and make sure the boys were understanding all that was being said. She is so wonderful!

Ok, this pool was ICE cold. Can you tell?

I'm SO sad our video didn't work, but trying not to dwell on it.

In all, eight boys ended up being baptized, even those who we thought were coming as guests.

Love this one. They are showing their new necklaces we gave them. They would never smile like this for me, but Geoff was behind me dancing around like an idiot…it worked.

This morning when Geoff and I returned from the store, they were all waiting at the gate with their grades from last term (we are now on school holiday). There is LOTS of room for improvement, but three of them had one B and the two oldest had near perfect attendance so we were pleased with that. Thankful for all that God has done, and continues to do. Please pray for these boys, that God would continue to draw them to Himself and that they would grow in their love for Him. I know that many of you have prayed for them, and all that has happened in the past week is surely a result of your prayers. We are so thankful that the Lord allowed us to be a part of this.

Happy Sunday

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 23 Mar 2014 14:30:00 +0000

I'm realizing that it must look like we have a lot of parties at our house, and that would actually be true. There is a good reason for that. Not only is it a good bridge for building relationships with our Namibian friends, but having friends to our house is also pretty much our only source of entertainment. That being the case, it doesn't take much for us to find a reason to invite friends over. For instance, Thursday night we rented Frozen on iTunes and it also happened to be Namibia's Independence Day the next day…sounds like a reason for a party!

Two Herero friends sporting their traditional dress. Everyone wears their tribal outfit on Independence Day, so fun!

Seeing "Frozen" for the very first time, AND got a surprise visit from Roberto.

Tomorrow is Davis' birthday, but Friday night he celebrated with his friends, Sheldon and Cameron.

This is how they looked much of the night…video games, ugh! I'm glad Davis said he enjoyed his party though. Cannot believe this is his THIRD birthday in Africa!

This Sunday morning we had a wonderful devotional time, our family and the boys having church together at our house. We started by talking about Lent and the coming of Easter. Together we read and discussed the story of Jesus's baptism and the coming of the Holy Spirit. I am overjoyed to say, I think they are REALLY GETTING IT! After talking about Jesus's baptism, we talked about believer's baptism and shared how Geoff and I had been baptized together in a swimming pool and Sophia in a hot tub! They thought that was pretty funny. After talking about what baptism is, what it means and doesn't mean, we asked if they'd like to be baptized and we got an enthusiastic, head nodding, eyes big, 'yes'! We are overjoyed at this prospect and will continue to talk with them more about it. Geoff and I are going to talk with some friends in town who might be willing to share their church or swimming pools with us for this purpose. I would love to make it a really special occasion for them…more to come. We concluded our time together by going through our Resurrection Eggs for the second year in a row. They absolutely love doing them.

In the above photo the boys are hard at work on thank you cards to their pen pals in Atlanta, GA. I love the effort they put into them.

Happy Sunday from rainy Otjiwarongo!

Something to celebrate! (And prayer request)

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Mon, 10 Mar 2014 07:09:00 +0000

I thought I'd share a few photos from recent weeks. We've been doing a little celebratin around here.

Our friend, Waymuvada. We met him when we first arrived. He's often helped Geoff in our yard and over the past two years he's become a treasured friend.

Last weekend while Geoff and Waymuvada were hauling the clippings from our palm trees out to the dump site, they came upon these cuties who were happy to help with the work for N$1…

"Cheers" to a great morning of soccer!

I love these ladies, Martha and Beneliza! They were Sametime's and Albert's teachers last year. Every Monday morning all year long, Geoff and I would go to their classrooms and bring snacks for the boys for that week. Over time, I got to know them and LOVE them! We enjoyed a special lunch together at our house last Friday. They both love the Lord and are such an encouragement to me.

Fritz turned 16 last Friday. We went to his school at break time and I yelled, "Hey birthday boy!" out the car window. (I love to embarrass these guys). We picked the gang up for a special supper at Wimpy, complete with a serenade from the employees. I think it was a birthday he'll remember. We made a point of celebrating each of the boys' birthdays this year, and his was the last one.

YEAH!! Courtney is here! You may remember our teammate Courtney, who served here in Otji with us for a year and a half and returned to the US a year ago. We are so excited to have her visiting with us for a week…just like old times. Man, realizing she's been gone for a year now, makes me realize just how long we've been here!

The boys were happy to see her and she brought candy and silly string, something new for them.

Prayer Request

We continue to wait on a response from US immigration regarding Esther's immigration status. We've been told we should hear from them within the next few weeks. That response will determine when we can return home and if we are able to return permanently to the US at this time. Please be praying for a favorable outcome, that God would guide those reviewing our case, and for peace for us as we await their decision. As you can imagine, it is difficult for us to make plans regarding our return when this outcome is still uncertain. We appreciate your prayers.

Oh how He loves me! Oh how He KNOWS me!

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Thu, 27 Feb 2014 19:25:00 +0000

This morning I woke up missing Godlieb. I told Geoff, "We should go find the boys today. I miss Godlieb. I wish he'd show up for supper tonight." I was making a roast and mashed potatoes and gravy and knew he'd love it. It had been almost a week and a half since we'd seen them, with the exception of Saturday morning soccer.

Our day was busy, and though we began the morning out in the location, we didn't make it back in during the afternoon to visit Godlieb and ask him to join us for supper. As I was starting supper the rains began. About 5 o'clock I asked Geoff to open the front door to let the breezes in the house (still pouring outside). When he opened the door, I heard him say, "Godlieb!" I couldn't believe it. I met him at the door and said, "Godlieb! Did you know this morning I told Uncle Geoff that I was missing you and wished you'd come for supper today? Did you hear me all the way out in the location?"

"Yup," he mumbled, looking down and trying not to smile too big. Our family has a special bond with Godlieb, since he lived with us for ten weeks last summer. I haven't shared a whole lot about that, since it is such an emotional story. The Lord has been so good to keep us close after all we've gone through together. For that we are very grateful. Tonight he enjoyed his fill of beef roast and mashed potatoes, then took a hot shower and put on some clean clothes. He and Geoff played Go Fish and Yahtzee. I asked why he and the other boys hadn't joined us for church last Sunday. "The clothes was dirty, no wata." I feel that familiar knot in my stomach, and then am reminded, I cannot meet every need.

The rains kept coming as it was getting dark and we knew it was going to get real interesting trying to drive him home. The location floods with big rains and roaring, impassable rivers suddenly appear. So we loaded him up with sandwiches for tomorrow and headed out into the storm. I must say that trip through the location was the most excitement I've had in a while. We got him as far as we could, then flagged down a bakkie (pick-up) and asked if Godlieb could jump in the back to get across the "river". We watched to make sure they got him across and then turned around (much easier said than done) and headed for home.

It was a sweet night and a very sweet reminder of how intimately my God knows me. After Godlieb walked into the house, Geoff had laughed, "Wow Leah, God sure loves you!" I was reminded of Psalm 139:1-6.

"O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. You hem me in--behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain."

It was as if God was saying to me, "I know what matters to you, I know what you desire. Don't ever worry that I am not listening, that I do not care. I KNOW."

Thank you God for today's reminder. Thank you for sweet Godlieb. Thank you that you love me and you know me and I that I never need to doubt that. And thank you for the RAIN on the roof that keeps on coming.

The Perfect City

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 16 Feb 2014 14:00:00 +0000

Today is Sunday and as is the case on many Sundays, that means church, sloppy joes, and boys at our house. After spending two years together, they've become quite comfortable in our home and we love that. As soon as we arrive from church, they all head to the kitchen sink to wash their hands. Next, out come the matchbox cars, guns, and other various weapons. Finally they're all off in different directions, some sprawled out on the floor, some in the back yard, some on bikes in the front. As always, Godlieb stays close by my side, whether I'm preparing the food or washing dishes after the meal, he is there looking in the cupboards, playing on my phone, doing things to make me laugh. One thing I can always count on after a Sunday with the boys...there will be no leftovers. It wouldn't matter if I cooked for ten or one hundred, there would be no leftovers.

This week my dear friend Tegen sent me this devotional from John Piper. Boy, did it speak to my heart and bring comfort. I knew this was something I needed to share with the boys.

He has prepared a city for them. (Hebrews 11:16)

No pollution, no graffiti, no trash, no peeling paint or rotting garages, no dead grass or broken bottles, no harsh street talk, no in-your-face confrontations, no domestic strife or violence, no dangers in the night, no arson or lying or stealing or killing, no vandalism and no ugliness.

The city of God will be perfect because God will be in it. He will walk in it and talk in it and manifest himself in every part of it. All that is good and beautiful and holy and peaceful and true and happy will be there, because God will be there.

Perfect justice will be there, and recompense a thousandfold for every pain suffered in obedience to Christ. And it will never deteriorate. In fact, it will shine brighter and brighter as eternity stretches out into unending ages of increasing joy.

When you desire this city above everything else on the earth, then you honor God, who, according to Hebrews 11:10, is the architect and builder of the city. And when God is honored, he is pleased and not ashamed to be called your God.

We began by asking them if they'd ever been to a perfect city. Otjiwarongo? Omaruru? What about Windhoek? They agreed that none of those cities was perfect, but what about America? That must be perfect they thought. Godlieb shouted out, "Namibia is hungry!" That is their way of expressing when something is poor and suffering. We agreed, yes, Namibia is hungry, but so is America. We discussed that someone could be rich and still be hungry…hungry for Jesus.

I told them that the Bible tells us that God is preparing a perfect city for those who love him, a city where he is the actual builder and architect where HE WILL ALSO LIVE! We asked them if they could imagine what that city was. Once we established the city is heaven, we asked them who gets to go there? What must you do to enter that city? Inevitably, someone says, "Do good things…" This mentality runs DEEP in Africa. We assured them none of us could ever be good enough for heaven. We talked (again) about Jesus and the cross and forgiveness. I told them that if they love God and accept his forgiveness for their sins, one day we can all be together in that perfect city. Their faces lit up and their eyes brightened, showing us they thought this sounded like a good idea.

Together we prayed that God would plant eternity in their hearts, that they would long for eternity with Him and that in this life, where they experience SO MUCH suffering each and every day, they would hold onto hope for an eternity to come that will be free of suffering. We also prayed that God would be their comfort and help in this place, giving them the peace and strength they need.

Eventually we must drop them off at the group of shacks they call home, 5ft x 8ft dwellings pieced together with random scraps of metal found at the dump. The floors are dirt and the furniture is random pieces of junk salvaged from the dump (an old bucket, tire, or a piece of an old car). Rarely are their mothers there. There are different extended family members milling about, young men drinking, babies in the dirt. They all watch as the boys get out of the van, some greet us. It feels dark, and it feels terrible to leave them there.

As we drive away the tears roll down my cheeks. I ask myself, how do they seek after you Lord, in this terrible environment? They have everything stacked against them. Jesus, you must do it. You must draw them to you. Lord, I beg you to awaken their spirits to their need for you. My only comfort and hope is that I will see them again in that perfect city, where there will be no more tears. They will no longer wonder where their next meal will come from. They will no longer fear beatings or abuse from family members or strangers. Lord, save them and come quickly.

On Valentine's Day we had an unexpected guest show up just in time for a special dinner. We thanked God for bringing him so that we could shower him with love and affection, or "fill up his hug bank" as we like to say.

Our happy little nugget turns 5 months on Tuesday.

I will never be the same again

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Fri, 31 Jan 2014 12:14:00 +0000

I will never be the same again,

I can never return, I've closed the door.

I will walk apart, I'll run the race

And I will never be the same again.

These lyrics have been rolling around in my mind a lot lately. Two years ago, right about now, we had said our goodbyes to all we knew and loved and were headed off to the Dark Continent. TWO YEARS! Wow, that is a long time. It's hard to articulate exactly how, but I know I am changed. I know that, like the song says, I will never be the same again. Though I realize that song is talking about the change that happens when we get to know Jesus as Savior, spending two years living and loving in another culture is also an experience that changes one forever.

In addition to the looking back and reflecting on all God has done…joys, sorrows, victories, difficulties, I am also looking ahead. God-willing, in only a few months we will be returning to our home culture. This prospect brings a whole other set of emotions and questions. What will it feel like to be home? Will I miss Africa terribly? How will I feel when I think about those here who I love? Will things ever feel the way they did before we left? What will our old friendships look like? How will we process and adjust to American culture again (reverse culture-shock)? We've grown accustomed to being surrounded by black skinned people and will be returning to a community with very little color. Will that bother me? While I was writing this, our friend Godlieb showed up at the gate, sweaty and ready for a hug. How I am going to miss that!

Lately Geoff and I often find ourselves saying, "I'm going to miss this". Walks at dusk as the sun sets behind the mountains, the acacia trees of the bushveld outlined against the setting sun. Sending my boys to Hakahana for warm, fresh bread and cold Coke. Brown, dusty faces shouting "Pastor Zheff!!" everywhere we go. The sound of the wind blowing through the palm fronds. The pitter patter of rain on our metal roof during the rainy season. Our lifestyle here is so simple. My weekly entertainment is going to the grocery store and having coffee out with Geoff. I cook a from-scratch meal every night…and I enjoy it. It will be challenging to adjust to the frantic pace of life in the US.

There was a time when Geoff and I felt fairly sure that God was going to call us to return to Namibia for another term. However, as time progressed it became increasingly clear to us that this was not the case, due mainly to the academic and social needs of our older children. As long as all goes well with Esther's immigration, we do not plan to return to Namibia for a second term. Geoff and I both have a peace that this would not be best for our children at this time in their lives. But our decision is not because we don't want to be in Africa or in missions. Our situation is not unique, but rather very common in families with teenagers. Some families choose to have their kids at a boarding school, where they might benefit from the academic and social opportunities. We've considered this, researched it, but it just didn't fit with our family's needs.

As we anticipate leaving in the coming months, we desire to finish well and leave with a healthy sense of closure. I'm reading about the dynamics of "re-entry" and realizing how vitally important it is to close the "emotional" door on our time here. We have heard many times that the process of re-entering the home culture is often more difficult emotionally than initially leaving it and entering the new culture. I must admit, that's a scary thought. But, as in every challenge, change, transition, or unknown, we have One who will get us through, who will bring us to the other side. He knows where we've been and He knows where we're going. He's been with us through the culture shock, the adjustments, the laughter and the tears, and will continue to be as we return to the US. If we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us (James 4:8).

God is our shelter and strength,

always ready to help in times of trouble.

So we will not be afraid, even if the earth is shaken

and mountains fall into the ocean depths;

even if the seas roar and rage,

and the hills are shaken by the violence.

Psalm 46:1-3

Taking a stroll down memory lane. Two years ago, in the last moments with my friends.

Saying goodbye. Not the best pic but that's alright.

THEN
Introduction to Africa, heading off to ABO. Mayfield Guest House, Nairobi, Kenya. Excited and a little dazed and confused.

NOW

Don't have a recent pic of the whole family.

Take my word for it, the kids aren't the only ones who've aged!

Prayer/praise update! This morning we received Esther's birth certificate. She is officially Esther Rejoice Swanson! We celebrate this and give all glory to God. Her passport is now in process. Thanks for your prayers!

In case you missed it...

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Mon, 27 Jan 2014 13:32:00 +0000

Greetings friends. My main purpose for this post is to share our most recent newsletter, which was sent out a week or two ago. For some reason it was not able to be delivered to anyone with an AOL email address, so our friends, family, and supporters with AOL have not yet seen it (I believe). We've posted it in the right margin of Beautiful Feet's home page if you have not received it and would like an update.

Since the letter went out, I can update you on one of our prayer requests...that Geoff would be able to pick up Esther's birth certificate in Windhoek. A week ago he made the LONG drive to Windhoek to get it. It was supposed to have been ready weeks earlier. We'd already checked once before, but this is how things go here. So when he got there he waited a couple of HOURS while the lady tried to figure out where it was, etc. She began the process of making it herself and would sporadically disappear for LONG periods of time leaving Geoff wondering what in the world was going on.

Finally, she reappeared and said that she had bad news. Esther's birth was not "in the system" (though we had her original birth certificate in hand) and therefore we had to return to the place of her birth and deal with them. To say this was bad new was an understatement. Geoff left shocked and frustrated. So much so that as he was calling me on the phone to fill me in, he backed into a brand new government vehicle parked behind him. Good times.

So Geoff returned to Otji hot, tired, and frustrated and planning to head to the town where Esther was born in the morning and duke it out there. Since he's gotten to know the employees at home affairs in Otji a bit, I suggested maybe we stop by there and just check to see if there was anything they could do to help. THANK YOU LORD! The lady there was very angry that he'd been sent home from Windhoek without the birth certificate. She said that we had all the required documents and completed applications we needed. She even called Windhoek and spoke (yelled) to the lady in charge there. The person in Windhoek requested our documents be couriered to her and she would do the birth certificate and courier it back to us this week. WOW. Geoff and I were nearly speechless, having never had anyone advocate for us this way. God is SO good. Looking back, we can see that without God's hand intervening, this could have gone on forever. Since our documents were going directly to the person in charge, we are confident we will receive the birth certificate this week. All is well that ends well…

Kids here started back to school a couple weeks ago (see newsletter). We ran into our friend from the center, Monica, and she told us she was so impressed with the boys..IMPRESSED! I had to clarify and make sure I'd heard her correctly. They had brought their report cards for her to see and they had all passed into the next grade level, which we already knew. So proud of them. We had a nice day with them a week ago when they joined us for church, lunch afterwards, and of course some video games. One sweet memory I will always treasure of the boys is Geoff pulling out in the combi to bring them home, and hearing their sweet voices shouting out the windows, "Thank you auntie!" and "Bye Mr. Leah". Geoff and I intend to meet with their new teachers soon but our house has been a sick house for the past couple weeks. See, even though we are (blissfully) missing out on the arctic freeze, we are still not immune to the colds and viruses. Sophia's just coming out of it, Davis is on antibiotics, and Geoff is in bed now...oh, and baby is teething. Even as I write this, I am typing with my one free hand. The other is holding a drooling, sucking, chomping, amazingly good-smelling chunk of love. Again, good times. But I'm not complaining. His mercies are new every morning and He gives us what we need for each day. Thankful.

Esther Rejoice 4 months

What Christmas looks like…Holiday club at the dump and Emmanuel

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Wed, 18 Dec 2013 15:50:00 +0000

What does Christmas look like? Twinkling lights, shining tinsel, shimmering ornaments?

What does Christmas smell like? Roast turkey, warm gingerbread, spiced cider?

Last week these children gathered to have fun and learn about God's faithfulness through the story of Joseph. Amidst the smoke and garbage, smells of decaying animals and burning plastic, they sang, colored, and listened.

Where the mama's gather. Many of our boys' mothers spend each day right here.

Having an opportunity to be creative!

Emmanuel, God with us. I have been reading a beautiful book with my boys called, "The Bronze Bow", which takes place during the time of Jesus' ministry on earth. While reading to them, I've been moved to put myself in the place of the characters, who were able to follow Jesus and walk with him, listening to his teachings and learning from him. I've found myself longingly contemplating what that would be like. I want to see Jesus! How wonderful it would be to walk next to him and have him speak directly to me, to answer my questions and minister to my spirit.

If Jesus were here today, I believe He would be out at the dumpsite, feeding the hungry, healing the sick, giving hope to the hopeless. Surely He would turn the hearts of those hurting and lost people to Himself! They would only need to look at him, listen to his voice, touch the hem of his robe, and they would know! But praise GOD He has sent us His Holy Spirit, so that those who've called upon His name can experience His presence now. And it is by that Holy Spirit that we minister. We are Jesus' ambassadors on this earth. WE must go to the lost and the hurt where Jesus would surely be if he were here. WE must go and be HIS hands and feet. This past week Geoff, Heidi, Roberto, Malcolm, Rovaldo, and Clemencia where Jesus' hands and feet to those children. Because He came to us, we go to them. That is what Christmas looks like. Emmanuel, God is with us!

Happy Birthday Tiba and Niclas! And please, whatever you do, don't smile!

A very special thank you to Mrs. Brown's and Mrs. Broyles' classes at Bridgeway Christian Academy in Georgia. Because of the generous gifts they sent, we were able to put together special Christmas care packages for our boys (and many others) filled with toiletries and treats. Thank you for caring about these boys!

Reading the letters from their pen pals. The students had written their letters right around Halloween, so our boys now have a good understanding of what Halloween and Trick or Treating are, LOL.

We recently spent two nights in Windhoek. Geoff needed to be in line at the Office of Home Affairs at 6 am in order to apply for Esther's new birth certificate, but he got it done, praise God! We also did some Christmas shopping and had our team Christmas party at our leader's home the second night. It was delightful to get away. It's amazing what two nights away can do!

We've found a hotel we love if our visit requires an overnight. This is the view from the pool.

These two…though they might never admit it, they are the best of friends.

Little Miss Chubkins taking her first dip.

We had heard a rumor of a park in Windhoek having Christmas lights, so of course we had to check it out. I think this was our first time playing at a park since we left home. It was a treat. The lights were fun too, however, they did not compare to our annual lights drive with our friends, the Kraemers. And we definitely missed Tom's rendition of "Holly Jolly Christmas"!

Celebrating Christmas with our team. We had a fabulous dinner, sang some carols, listened to the Christmas story and did a gift exchange. What a blessing to have our new leaders here in Namibia!

And last but definitely not least, I leave you with this hilarious and totally freaky photo of Esther with Santa at the mall. This one is definitely going in the baby book!

Holiday Club!

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 08 Dec 2013 09:33:00 +0000

It's holiday here in Namibia, which equates to our summer vacation in the States. School is out until mid-January and there's very little going on. There are no Christmas festivities, much of the town has left for the villages and farms. To break up the monotony a bit (for ourselves and for the kids in the Location) Geoff and Heidi, along with their team of volunteers, put on a "holiday club" this past week at Ombili church.

Team planning session

Much of the week focused on the story of Joseph. The actors spent a lot of time preparing for their roles. The kids loved it!

The three musketeers, Yolanda, Jessica, and Rita. LOVE this photo of them!

The other three musketeers...Malcolm, Roberto, Rovaldo

Our friend from church, Seppora, who runs a kindergarten in the location.

Clemencia pointing the way to God

Seppora and her granddaughter…those eyes!

This boy was praying to accept Jesus.

Handing out bread and water at the dumpsite, where next week the team will repeat the holiday club. There are lots of kids out there since school is out. Please pray for a fruitful week.

They had around 80 kids each day

Lastly, you know I have to take this opportunity to share a couple cute pics of Esther with her big brothers.

Cuddling with D after just waking up in the morning.

Henry always gets BIG smiles from our girl. One day he told me, "Mom, I don't know what it is, but for some reason I think Esther is the cutest when she wears just a white onesie." Another time he said, "I was a little worried she might not be cute, but she is definitely the cutest baby I've ever seen." Love that kid.

A week (or so) in photos

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 01 Dec 2013 09:21:00 +0000

Team lunch with our previous unit leader and his daughters visiting from Canada

Saturday morning soccer crew

Preparing my table for Thanksgiving. Sunday we hosted several AIM staff who were visiting Namibia. It was incredibly hot, before turning the oven on!

Don't we look hot? We had Canadians, Namibians, South Africans, and a few Americans. I love having the opportunity to talk with veteran missionaries and hear their stories. It's very humbling to hear them speak of their experiences, some having spent several decades on the field, raising their children and often living in very difficult settings.

This is where we spent much of our Thanksgiving Day…in our air conditioned room. Oh, how thankful I am for that air conditioner!

Friday we celebrated Godlieb's 13th birthday. Sorry for the terrible pics. We had strawberry cake per his request and he chose the movie, "Bolt".

Our sweet boy Godlieb

Yesterday, we and some friends headed to a lodge a little over an hour out of town to swim and have lunch. It's always SO good to have a change of scenery, if only for a few hours.

Heidi and Anna

The kids' table

Just LOVE this pic of D!

Sisters

Finally, the first official pic of my FOUR kids together

Esther loves to chat with Daddy

We are still waiting for all of the documents needed to begin the immigration process for Esther. We appreciate your prayers for this process. Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving. I am thankful to each of you who read Beautiful Feet!

"The Christian who walks with the Lord and keeps constant communion with Him will see many reason for rejoicing and thanksgiving all day long." Warren Wiersbe

Let's make a habit of looking for reasons to thank the Lord all year long!

Prayer and Praise Update

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Thu, 14 Nov 2013 19:16:00 +0000

Two weeks ago we shared our newsletter and broke the big news about our new daughter Esther. In that newsletter we shared some prayer requests. Well, we KNOW you've been praying because we are seeing God at work. I just have to share some of our praises!

One of our prayer requests was for peace and courage as we took Esther out into this community where adoption is very foreign and not easily accepted. After Esther's adoption became official, I felt a new sense of peace in bringing her out. The reactions themselves hadn't changed, but I felt no fear. Geoff and I wasted little time bringing her to the busiest place in town…the lunch counter at the grocery store on a Sunday after church! As you can imagine, we turn heads literally everywhere we go, but it's ok. I have seen people actually stop in their tracks and turn around as we walk by, so silly. But overall, we have been pleasantly surprised at people's reactions. EVERYONE asks questions…the most frequent include, "Where did you get that baby?" "Whose baby is that?" and my personal favorite, "Where is the mother?"

We are trying our best to be good witnesses in our response, after all, we are here as Christ's ambassadors. But I must admit it can be challenging when the checkout lady at the grocery store stares you in the face and shakes her head "no", when you explain that she is our baby and then asks, "Where is her REAL mother?" We remind ourselves that they have no frame of reference for what they are seeing and we have an opportunity to shed a positive light on adoption. Overall, people have responded very enthusiastically and that has been a great blessing.

Last Sunday we took Esther to our church for the first time. Our pastor and his wife called us up in front of the church to introduce Esther and announce that our family has grown through adoption. We had not expected this, but it was their way of saying they were behind us and they wanted the church family to know it. Our pastor commented that "We Africans are not used to adoption but we need to change the way we think about it. We must be more accepting because it is a picture of what Christ has done for us. He has grafted us into his family, just as Geoff and Leah have grafted Esther into theirs." He also commented on Esther Rejoice's "good African name". His words were a powerful statement of support and we were so grateful. The ladies of the church were quick to congratulate me and I soon wondered what had I been so worried about?!

The second BIG answer to prayer has been with Esther's birth mom, who I will call Dee. I had asked for prayer for her physical, spiritual, and emotional healing, as well as for God's help in smoothing out the details of how our relationship would work, now that Esther was born and with us. We'd spent so much time together in the past and talked often so it felt strange not to have as much contact. I was concerned about her and wanted to know that she was ok. Last week, I asked Dee's aunt (my friend) if I could take her out for a birthday milkshake and said if Dee wanted to join us she was welcome. They were both up for that offer immediately. The three of us had a very pleasant lunch together. Dee seemed her old self, happy and at peace, and physically doing much better. I was so thankful.

This week Dee contacted me to see if I would help her put together her CV so that she could begin looking for a job. Today Geoff and I worked with her and enjoyed our time together, as we always have. On our way home Dee made a comment about the tribal tradition of not washing your hair for three months after giving birth so that the "winds" don't come in. Dee has shared with me about these "winds" in the past. It is a tribal superstition and the winds are basically evil spirits believed to enter the body of the mother if she doesn't do certain things…like for instance, staying warm during child birth, necessitating wearing hats and socks while in the hospital. Dee and I have had many conversations over the past months about the winds and about God. Because this thinking is so engrained in this culture, you cannot just say, "Well, that's not true." Rather I think it's best to instead point them to the True God and who HE is. As they come to understand Him, they will be able to see the deception of the enemy that pervades this culture.

Our discussion about the necessity (or lack thereof) of refraining from hair washing lead to a great talk about the Lord. Geoff and I are firm believers that discipleship is best lived out in relationship. This conversation comes after many months of friendship and many previous conversations about the Bible, who God is, God's love, and more. But it is God who works in the hearts of man and always in His timing. We could see Him at work in Dee's heart today. For the first time I could really see things clicking as she asked questions about who God is is. The joy I felt when after we explained (again) why Jesus had died on the cross, she looked at me and said, "So, it's like He's given us a second chance?" I smiled and shouted, "Yes! That's exactly what it's like!" Isn't the Lord amazing, how He draws us to himself? We have seen Him drawing Dee to himself and she admits that she has felt Him. In this culture people tend to think that bad things happen because you're bad. I know that Dee has struggled with feeling that her sickness and surgeries following Esther's birth were a punishment. We assured her that is not the way our loving God works. Though we cannot fully understand, God allowed this in her life for some purpose. Everything He allows He will use for good if we allow Him. We are helping her to see that He has plan for her life and it is good. I think she is finally starting to believe it. What a privilege and a joy to be a witness to something so exciting. Thank you for your prayers and please keep it up!

BIG news!

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sat, 02 Nov 2013 19:11:00 +0000

You might recall in my last post I mentioned we'd been in the midst of some BIG stuff that I hoped to be able to share soon. Well, that time is now! If you receive our newsletter, you've already heard the news. For those of you who do not, rather than write the whole story again, we've shared our newsletter in the righthand margin, just click to read. If you're reading this post in email form, click on the "read more" link at the bottom and you'll come to Beautiful Feet's home page…our letter is on the right. One last thing, if you would like to receive our newsletter by email, please leave me your email address in comments or send me an email.

Ok, now that that's all out of the way….

We are thrilled to introduce to you our daughter, Esther Rejoice! Born September 17 and adopted November 1. There really are no words to express our thankfulness to the Lord for this incredible gift. While there are so many different facets of this story I could share with you, for now I will simply share about her birth and show some photos! Can you imagine the self-discipline it's taken for me to have this beautiful baby in my care and not be able to share photos?! There was just so much uncertainty, we couldn't bare to share our love for Esther with the world until we knew God had given her to us for keeps. Yesterday, He answered that prayer in a miraculous way and we praise Him for His faithfulness!

Tears of joy. Bringing Esther out to meet her Daddy. Talk about the MOST amazing feeling. The answer to more years of prayer than I care to count, wrapped up in my arms.

I was incredibly blessed to be there when Esther came into the world. I sat at her birth mom's head, stroking her hair as they prepared for the c-section. It was pretty surreal to be the one beside this time, and not the one on the table. When I heard Esther's cry I wept and wept. They wiped her down and handed her to me. What an amazing gift. I'll never forget the female anesthesiologist putting her hands on my shoulders, her masked face meeting me eye to eye and saying through tears, "May the Lord bless you."

As I mentioned in our letter, adoption is incredibly rare in Namibia. Open adoption is unheard of. When we visited the hospital prior to Esther's birth, I asked the staff if there would be a place for me to stay with the baby after the birth. They couldn't quite understand what I was talking about. We were definitely in unchartered territory. Never before had they seen a birth mother and adoptive mother arrive at the hospital together and leave together, let alone being in each other's presence during the hospital stay. Sophia was a great help. Since I obviously needed to be caring for Esther, Sophia helped out by spending time with the birth mom, watching videos on the computer together, playing games. The two of them had already developed a special friendship, after all they were much closer in age to each other than the birth mom and I were!

It was very interesting to contrast childbirth in a Namibian hospital with that in the US. There is no nursery, no lactation specialists. You bring EVERYTHING your baby needs, and I mean everything. They do not provide one single thing and this was in the private hospital. The nurses do not really give any instruction, nor do they assess the baby. I think they might have checked Esther's temp. once or twice. There are no charts to keep track of feedings and wet diapers…nothing! Geoff and our kids stayed at a hotel in town (Esther was not born in Otjiwarongo), while I stayed at the hospital with Esther for two nights.

Big brothers and sister meeting Esther for the first time. They are crazy about her and take such good care of her too.

Esther hanging with her bros. In the craziness of the days leading up to Esther's birth, I forgot all of my baby blankets of all things! We had to make a quick stop to pick up a couple in town.

After two nights and three days, Esther's birth mom was ready to be discharged and we had the legal documents to take Esther home with us. As we were preparing to leave, one of the nurses took me aside and told me she really thought I was making a mistake by letting the birth mom see the baby. I told her I understood her point, but our situation was a little different, as we were already friends and involved in her life. There's no question there were risks involved, but this was the way God chose to do this. We couldn't change that, nor would we have wanted to. We headed home and tearfully parted ways, expecting that we'd be seeing each other less now. We had no idea all that was just around the corner (thank God for that); the incredible challenges, stress, and faith-stretching trials. But God knew, He was already there. Looking back, we just praise Him for bringing us through it all. There are several scriptures that will probably always remind me of this time. Some were the warfare scriptures I prayed out loud many time a day some days, others were the verses telling of God's trustworthiness and His sovereignty in all things. But the one God frequently brought to my mind was Psalm 71:21,22. "Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once more." I had hope that one day we would reach the end of this difficult road and we would again be ok...and we did...and it is. And all glory belongs to God.

3 days

1 week

3 weeks

4 weeks

5 weeks

Esther and Mommy in our happy place

Adoption day with our social worker, Wendy. God is so good.

In two days I turn 41. I was a little worried that getting up for those middle of the night feedings was going to be so much worse this time around. I was pleasantly surprised to find that not to be the case at all. Maybe the difference this time is that I haven't just gone through a c-section myself or maybe it's just that I'm so thankful. Every night as I nuzzled Esther close to me in bed while giving her the middle of the night bottle, I would pray that the Lord would allow her to remain with us forever. That choice was up to Him. I knew He knew best and that I had to trust Him. Oh, how difficult that was! Now my prayers are of thanksgiving. He truly does give us the desires of our hearts.

Uff da

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Tue, 22 Oct 2013 16:31:00 +0000

Maybe it's my Minnesota heritage, but I can come up with no better title for this post than "Uff da". I guess that's the best description I can come up with for our past few months. Maybe you have noticed there have been no new posts to Beautiful Feet for quite a while, then again maybe you have not. Anyway, it isn't because I was feeling lazy and not in the mood to write. Actually quite the contrary, I've been dying to write about all that's been going on, but for now that will have to wait. Let's just say we've been on quite the rollercoaster ride. I'm talking the kind of ride that would make Wild Thing at Valleyfair feel like a leisurely stroll through the park. But enough of that for now. Stay tuned, more to come.

The purpose of this post though, is just to share some photos from our day. Haven't you been longing for some cute kids photos? It's Tuesday, which means the Multipurpose Center. Today we learned about the Parable of the Talents. It was a good day. They listened and I think they got it!

We help with serving lunch before we share our lesson. You may recall that we worked hard to get our boys into this program, so that they can receive a snack at break time as well as lunch each school day. Monica, who runs the center, has become a dear friend and a great support to our ministry.

On Sunday we promised the boys we would get them haircuts today, so that is what we did. I told them I wanted a "before and after" photo...

Poor Fritz, he hates it when I take pictures, but it's been so long!

Sweet Tiba

Fritz in the chair

Is this the best?!

Sametime's hair becomes Godlieb's mustache...so gross but totally hilarious. I needed a good laugh!

Michael (aka Ricardo)

Just wrong

Albert cozying up to Geoff

Sametime, Tiba, and Albert took turns pretending they were taking me on a trip. Sametime was taking me ("Mr. Leah") to Omaruru and we were were going to "buy something".

And the "after"...a handsome bunch I must say.

Let's catch up

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 18 Aug 2013 21:03:00 +0000

I can't believe it's been a whole month! I've been looking over photos to jog my memory on what's been going on. We celebrated Sametime's 10th birthday the first week of August. What a joy it was to make him feel special. We texted his teacher in the morning to tell him to wait for us after school. I wish I had a photo of the smile that greeted us at the door. We took him to lunch at Wimpy and brought a birthday cake with candles. Funny side note: As we were heading out the door to pick up Sametime, his sister texted us to say, "It is Sametime's birthday. Will you pay for him a cake?" We told her we were already on it. We intend to celebrate each of the boys' birthdays this year. Most of them don't know when their birthdays are so it will REALLY be a surprise to them!

Two weeks ago we got away for two nights to our favorite escape, the coastal town of Swakopmund. It was cold and wet, but we still had fun. The highlight was a whale-watching catamaran ride. Unfortunately, we didn't see any whales, but we did see wagon wheel jellyfish, cape fur seals, dolphins, and pelicans.

This was Godlieb's first time seeing the ocean. It was such fun to see it through his eyes and hear his questions and observations...

"The rain does not come here? If you come here you will just die," about the desert.

"It's cold and it does not smell fine," about the sea air.

"Does it ever stop?" about the movement of the ocean. He even tried an oyster!

"Look Geoff, no more scaring!"

Last week the boys ended their second term. Friday morning we went to the school and got all their report cards. They all improved their grades and many of them even got some B's for the first time! We are so proud of them. This week we are celebrating holiday with a field trip to the Cheetah Conservatory (photos to come). We're thankful for the relationships we've developed with (most of) the staff and teachers at the school over the past year. The fact that some have sought us out when they've noticed the boys missing school, having behavioral issues, or not applying themselves, has shown us that they really care about the boys' success.

These three so didn't want their picture taken but they're always good sports for me.

Saturday Roberto and Malcolm returned from university. Thirteen of us celebrated his 19th birthday with cake, lots of Dutch Blitz, and watching The Lion King...go figure. It seems to be a crowd favorite in these parts. Godlieb entertains us daily by acting out his favorite scenes.

"Look who just turned four!"

While we were partying it up, three dusty travelers wearing frowns on their faces arrived at the gate. This isn't real unusual for a Friday or Saturday night, as their mom is often gone all night and they've no place to find shelter. They hesitated to come in with all the company already here, but Roberto and Malcolm are their buddies. It was such a blessing to see Roberto lavish love upon them with huge tackling hugs. They try to remain stoic, but it's so good for their hearts. Once all the company was gone, the sleeping bags were laid out, warm wash cloths given, and prayers said. Seeing their precious little brown heads peeking out from their sleeping bags just broke my heart. This just shouldn't be, but here I am and what am I to do. In the morning as Geoff and I were getting ready for church, there's a knock on the door.."Can I go for a bike ride Auntie?" We hear voices and laughter out in the yard as they play before leaving for church. I ask Geoff, "What kind of a place is this anyway?"

"It's a place of safety, that's what it is."

A place of safety. I like that. I spend a lot of time worrying about what will happen to these boys when we are gone and wondering if somehow our helping them now could hurt them in the long-run. But when that thought comes to my mind I am reminded, they have no place else to go for help. So many Namibians have made comments like, "You let them come, so they keep coming..." as if we are wrong to allow them to come to our home, wrong to give them the impression that we would want to help. This is the attitude of this culture and it is why they come to us. Though we have advocated, we have tried, they continue to have no safe place....

So while we are here, we will be that place.

For he will deliver the needy who cry out, the afflicted who have no one to help. He will take pity on the weak and the needy and save them from death. He will rescue them from oppression and violence for precious is their blood in his sight.

Psalm 72:12-14

Get outa town!

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 21 Jul 2013 15:31:00 +0000

This weekend mama insisted on a change of scenery. It had been much too long since we'd left Otjiwarongo. We headed north an hour or so to a little guest lodge, where we ate lunch, played pool, took a QUICK dip in the pool and just hung out together...

Soph's and Mom's idea of a relaxing afternoon

Godlieb contemplating a dip in the ice bath they call a pool...

After the 10 second dip

Davis being a ham

Playing Go Fish with some new friends

Love this pic...Shadows of Henry and friend Sheldon jumping on the trampoline

Sophia and her friend Uroel who presented her with the skull of the baboon he shot.

You may remember Sophia's history with baboons. I think this was some sort of revenge. I'm perfectly fine with the idea of one less baboon roaming the bush. Anybody need a great show-and-tell item? We've also got a nine foot long python skin, with the fangs...Oh, and an oryx, kudu, and hartebeast horn. I told Geoff that I think we are well on our way to opening a little Namibia nature center.

Broken

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 30 Jun 2013 21:04:00 +0000

The past several weeks things have seemed to be falling apart. We hadn't seen him much and had heard from the others he'd been missing school. every day. It's been two weeks now. We search and search for him and each shack leads us to another where he'd spent a night or two, no place is HOME, no place where he belongs. I struggle to go on with all the daily busyness and responsibilities, all the time wondering, "What is happening to him? What do we do?" We hear rumors of smoking (what we're not sure), illness. My spirit tells me we have to find him. But if we do, then what?

Friday morning Geoff and I decide to take a ride out to the dumpsite and hand out bread and water. I pray aloud on the way, "God, if it is your will that we find him, bring him to us." When we arrive at the dump we are met with MANY people. It is a busy day. There are men and women, elderly and children. Geoff hears it is chicken day, not fresh chicken day, "unsellable" chicken day. There are easily one hundred people there. As we get out of the van, children come running and old ladies with deep creased faces and missing teeth meet us at the van. "Denki," they nod their heads when we hand them a roll. One lady rocks back and forth shouting, "Denki Jesus! Denki Jesus!" The air is smokey and dusty and dirty. As I'm rapidly handing out roll after roll, I am all the time scanning the crowd for his face. Then I spot him, slowly meandering up to us. We are friends. I hardly recognize him at first. He's in too-small clothes I haven't seen before, a stained and dirty Cars t-shirt made for a three-year-old, not a twelve-year-old. I dart through the crowd toward him, hug and kiss him and try to hold back the tears pushing for release. "I'm so glad to see you," I choke it out..."Do you want to come with us?"

"Yes," he answers.

Monday we will meet with a social worker. We will bring him back to school and meet with the teacher. Hopefully it is not too late for him to go back. Knowing how to proceed is excruciatingly difficult...If this problem cannot be solved, would it be better we do nothing? Are we risking causing more heartache in his future by temporarily relieving the pain of today? I don't want to step outside of God's will in my desire to meet his needs, yet I am compelled to relieve the pain. I cannot NOT do something. Yet, I cannot solve the problem. Today while we were in the location, I asked him, "Is there anyone who would be looking for you now?" He shakes his head no.

Geoff asks, "Would your mother be looking for you?"

"No, I don't know." He shrugs his shoulders. Chances are she is not, as we have often gone to her looking for him, only to have her shrug her shoulders at our question.

We need prayer (wisdom, discernment). He needs prayer (protection from the enemy, hope). I need prayer (peace, strength). I sense in my spirit there could be terrible heartache ahead. Yet what can I do but do the next thing? I remind myself God brought me to this place for this. There is no question of that. So what is He asking of me? With extravagant love and full surrender come great risk. The sacrifice may be great, the pain may be deep. But with God by my side I must keep on, one day at a time, trusting He will provide what I need. God can bring justice for these children in the snap of a finger, He can provide friendships for my children, He can heal the sick. God is sovereign in all things and I must rest in that. I must trust Him for the life of this child, just as I trust Him with the lives of my own children. He is God...in Namibia, in Otjiwarongo, over the lives of these children who live alone, abandoned, neglected. The burden I carry is only there because He's allowed it...but He never meant for me to carry it alone.

Loved this from Ann Voskamp...
"Your life only becomes a tapestry if it ties itself to other lives. The only way to strengthen the fabric of society – is to weave the Christ who is in us — around other threads. The only way to repair the holes of this world where hearts are falling through – is to be broken away from your life like Christ and let your Christ-filled life be interwoven with other lives.

The only way to reweave this world into wholeness — is to let your Christ-life be broken for others.

“Reweaving shalom means to sacrificially thread, lace, and press our time, power, goods, and resources into the lives and needs of others,” writes Timothy Keller. “The strong must disadvantage themselves for the weak, the majority for the minority, or the community frays and the fabric breaks.”

The only way to care for the disadvantaged – is to disadvantage yourself –which is guaranteed to turn out for your advantage."

Wrapping it up with gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 23 Jun 2013 10:07:00 +0000

Our time with the team is quickly coming to a close. Tomorrow we will bring them to the airport and say our goodbyes. As I write, Geoff and Davis are acting as safari guides, touring Etosha National Park with our guests. Sophia is at church, and I must admit that Henry and I are basking in the quietude of a morning at home alone. I am taking this opportunity to catch up on a week's worth of housework, organize the plethora of extra craft supplies the team has so graciously donated, and of course blog! By the way, have you ever noticed how asking your boys to pick up their Legos always seems to turn into hours of quietly playing Legos? I'm going to remember to try this reverse psychology the next time I am wanting my boys to switch gears from video games to something else..."Boys, pick up your Legos please" (wink, wink).

Ok, I will try to pick up where we left off last post. Thursday morning we did an abbreviated program for our colleague Heidi's morning group.

Geoff and "Stripes" welcoming the kids.

Heidi invited this adorable kindergarten to join us for the morning.

Thursday's and Friday's Bible Club were full of more kids and more chaos....but in the end it all worked out. We adjusted our routine accordingly and went with it, after all it's God's plan, not ours! I think we ended up with about 175 kids in the end. There's no question, memories were made!

Game time

Do you think Roberto might have his work cut out for him?!

Looks like Henry's telling stories

I'm so tempted to say, "Trouble with a capital T (or S)", but I won't...or maybe I already did?

Albert getting away from it all. I think he saw me.

Melissa and some sweeties

My buddy

Friday night we capped off the week with a slide show and a movie night at the church (unfortunately I don't have any pics). Geoff shared the gospel and gave everyone an opportunity to accept Jesus as their savior. Just about everyone raised their hands. Later Geoff and I laughed, "Well I guess 200 people gave their hearts to Christ tonight". We can hope and pray right? The movie night was a huge success. We showed "RIO" and everyone loved it! We even had adult men and women come in and stay, including an older Herero woman dressed up in her traditional dress. I got a kick out of seeing the sillouete of her "horns" against the movie screen. If any of my Herero friends are reading this, forgive me, I do not know the official name of your headdress. You must tell me :)

Saturday was a big event called "Celebrate Jesus Youth Day". The purpose was to bring together youth of different races, tribes, schools, and churches to celebrate Jesus in one Spirit. The day began with a parade originating from two different spots in town, one from the location and another from the other side of town. The two groups converged at the soccer stadium in the location for hours of music, testimonies, and dancing. It was an awesome event and a great success. Our team marched with the group in the location. Here you see some of the yellow shirts from our Bible Club hanging out in the tree waiting for the parade to begin.

It was a might brisk walk. I somehow managed to walk arm and arm with a couple girls, while pulling Albert along by the hand behind me. Rhianna, one of the girls walking with me, was shouting in her sweet African voice, "We love Jesus! If you love Him too, you can join us!" Priceless!

Reflecting on the past week, I see God's hand in many places. I am grateful for much...

The children were blessed! They heard the gospel and were SHOWN the gospel in the love given by our team. They will not forget you Miss Melissa, Miss Shawna, Mr. Dave, and Mr. Terry! I know that even our Namibian helpers were impacted by their presence and in seeing their sacrifice in coming all this way to serve the children of Otjiwarongo.

Geoff and I were encouraged. In acting as "tour guide" for the team, we were reminded of our love of this place, the children, our friends. Sharing it with others gave us a fresh perspective and reminded us of all God has done to make us part of this community. We also believe that new doors for ministry were opened through all of the kids we met at the Bible Club, especially the teens. Devotional times with the team were like honeycomb, sweet for the soul...

I believe God blessed Terry, Dave, Shawna, and Melissa, and opened their eyes to new things about Himself and the world that He loves.

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9

Whirlwind Week Part I

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Wed, 19 Jun 2013 10:21:00 +0000

These are exciting days here in Otjiwarongo! On Friday a team of four arrived from our hometown of Stillwater, MN. They came bearing MANY gifts and TONS of supplies for a fabulous week-long Bible Club. We are loving our time with them. There is something very therapeutic about being able to share our day to day lives with friends from home. We are also enjoying daily devotions and prayer time together. We don't realize how as missionaries we are often the ones "pouring out"...teaching, leading. We have missed being fed by others!!

I had intended to blog about our time together after the team had left, but since I'm taking obscene numbers of photos each day, I thought I'd better do a couple installments.

The team: (L to R) Terry, Shawna, Melissa, Geoff, Leah, Dave, Henry, Davis, Sophia

The team is staying at NAMTI, the bible school in town. Their accomodations are wonderful. We do breakfasts and lunches at our house, and supper together at NAMTI.

Saturday was spent touring Otjiwarongo and prepping for bible club. Sunday the team was treated to a traditional Swanson Sunday morning, which means picking up about 20 people. I think we had 25 in the van. Shawna, Melissa, and Dave helped in my Sunday school class. It was a treat for the kids to have a special program. The team shared a modified version of Monday's lesson, the belt of truth.

Get ready, get set, ....

My peeps. They look like trouble don't they? But they're really not :)

Photo op

The team was met with a pretty tight schedule, a la me. But we did warn them that things could and likely would come up and "mess up" that nice neat schedule. As expected, they have, but the team has been great and very easy-going when it's come to the unexpected things that come up in our lives from day to day, whether that's been tracking down one of the boys with a wounded foot to do a dressing change, leaving the team at the center while Geoff dropped us at the clinic, the scheduling, rescheduling, and canceling of an appointment with a mother, taking detours home in order to find boys we haven't seen for a while, stops at the store to get someone something they need for a school project, etc, etc.....

The theme for the week is the Armor of God. Monday's lesson was the Belt of Truth

What actors we have!

Fritz proudly displaying his Belt of Truth. Could there be a more photogenic smile?

Tuesday's lesson...the Breastplate of Righteousness. Game time was a very rowdy water balloon battle. Sametime's bad foot doesn't seem to be slowing him down a bit! Before camp began we blasted Toby Mac from the church. Who do you think entertained the crowd with his smooth Michael Jackson-esque moves? The boy with the swollen, ace wrapped foot, Sametime. I guess it takes a lot to keep him down.

My eleven-year-old table working on their t-shirts.

Teammate Dave has such a great heart for the nations

One hundred plus kids, 12 leaders, a great building, and all the supplies we could ask for...God does supply all our needs (and more)!

Mekky, Rhita, Jessica, and Shirley

Please pray for our team as we continue to minister at our bible camp. Also, please pray that we can find one of the boys (G) who we have not seen since Sunday morning. I'm sick that he's been missing the camp. He hasn't been to school or the center for lunch or the bible club. Praying we will see him today.

Steadfast

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Sun, 09 Jun 2013 17:27:00 +0000

We heard through the grapevine that he was missing school. The other boys informed us that someone had stolen his shoes, the pair we'd bought him. We set out to track him down the next day and found him carrying a jug of water that must have weighed over fifty pounds. He confirmed that yes, his shoes had been stolen and no, he couldn't go to school without them. We said, "Hop in, let's go" and we were off. How could this boy with so much potential be finished with school because he didn't have school shoes? Yet the sad reality is that if we hadn't come to get him, his short school career could easily have been finished.

First stop something to eat. There was no telling when he had eaten last, especially if he had not been going to the center for lunch after school with the other boys. He wouldn't have felt comfortable going there if he hadn't been to school. That's how quickly things can fall apart. We stop at the grocery store deli counter and ask, "What looks good?" He chooses some macaroni with some sort of meat sauce and a big piece of chicken. Geoff and I get a chicken roll (Namibian fast food). We are used to the stares we get every time we are with the boys in public. Sometimes I just want to shout, "Go ahead..ask away! Ask us all the questions that are running through your mind!" Other times I could care less. I wonder what he feels. I say to him, "Did you know that you are one of my favorite boys? I mean one of my VERY favorite boys in the whole wide world?" He smiles that million dollar smile, the one that sometimes shines easily, especially on a full stomach, but other times can be so very hard to coax out.

We take our lunch to the park in the center of town. He leads us to the shady spot of his choice and we sit on the grass and we eat and we laugh. Oh the joy of watching him eat. He gets so full he can't finish it all, so he ties up his bag to save it for later. He will need it. After lunch we purchase the needed shoes, socks, pants, and shirts. Yes, we bought all this back in January, but when you consider how cheaply the uniforms are made, along with the fact that the same outfit is often worn 6-7 day out of the week, it's not surprising they would need replacements. We bring him home, hug, and I say, "You'll be at school tomorrow then?"

"Yes," he nods and he is.

It's Sunday morning and we go to "the field", the place where we pick up the boys for church. But this Sunday there's no one there. My heart sinks. Where are they? I'd even told him he could come for lunch today. Bummer. I think, "Well, it's time to start praying."

It's church now. We're singing. Geoff gets my attention and directs my eyes to his left. There he is, the million dollar smile beaming. They were late and missed our van. They saw us and were shouting for us and trying to flag us down, but it was too late, we were gone. So they walked. The whole way. Now not only is my mouth singing, but my heart too. During the offering, I leave the sanctuary briefly to talk to the children's church. When I return, Geoff grabs my shoulder to tell me that he put fifteen cents into the offering today. I'm overcome with tears. This child who often has nowhere to sleep and nothing to eat, has walked the long walk to be here and give his offering to the Lord.

We all return to our house for lunch, two big pans of pasta and garlic toast. While the others play a game of go fish, he joins me in the kitchen often, wanting to be near, to help, to peek in the oven and see what I'm making today. He is hungry. Today our friend Rovaldo joins us too. He speaks the boys' language and helps us to understand so much more. We were joking about the way he has eaten four bowls of pasta other days. He tells Rovaldo, in his language, that he has not eaten since Friday. We ask, "Did your mother feed you on Friday?"

"No. My mother is gone. I stay alone now." His last meal was lunch at the center on Friday, forty-eight hours ago. When we are in the kitchen I take him aside. I tell him, "Please do not ever go two days without eating again. If you are hungry, you come here. I will always feed you." Again, he nods and replies, "yes". He is happy today, silly and full of spunk. We love to see him this way. Food and love seems to do that to him. I put together a bag with some fruit and a little left-over pasta. I put him to work making PB&J's and tell him, "You take what you make." He's all business now.

Sometimes I love this place. Sometimes I hate it. I hate what I see happening to these kids. I hate a culture that seems to do nothing about it. But even in the darkest moments there is love. And in loving, there is joy. We love them with our whole hearts and experience real joy in laying down our lives for them. God's enabled us to love them regardless of their appearance, their intelligence, even their potential. I no longer notice the smells or think twice before embracing a dirt covered body, kissing a matted, dusty head. It's HIS love for them that flows from me. It's HIS love for me that prompts me to seek justice for their downtrodden lives. So even in the midst of the discouragements and what seem like constant setbacks, I can, like the Psalmist, say "Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you". (Psalm 63:3).

Mama's simple pleasure

noreply@blogger.com (Leah) — Wed, 29 May 2013 13:34:00 +0000

This post is about simple pleasures, the simple pleasure of watching my children "play". At home the majority of my days were occupied with watching my kids at play, whether dancing, soccer, football, or swimming. This has always been and continues to be something that makes this mama happy, at peace. In America, it so much a part of the culture to watch our kids in their various activities, but not so here in Namibia. How I miss it!

The boys recently began taking tennis lessons two afternoons per week. They are loving it, and so am I. In addition to their afternoon lessons, Geoff and I have been taking them in the early morning hours for a little phys ed. before hitting the books. During those first post-dawn hours it's cool and bright and quiet, a relaxing respite from the often draining aspects of ministry in this place.

Working up a sweat

Today you might resent all the running around you have to do, wearily steering that messy minivan from activity to activity. I challenge you to savor the chance to watch your kids at play and appreciate all of the opportunities they have for recreation. Trust me, it's a gift!