Love and Romance

Romance Through Text Messages

2010-04-17T13:42:00.000-07:00

why would a text message be any different? Consider it a super-short-short, where you only have 50 characters to convey something important.

There are many ways to be romantic with your partner; some are easier performed than others. Sending romantic text SMS messages - other than the cost should your cell phone plan not include them - are one the cheapest and easiest ways to show your love, and depending on how often you send them, they can also be one of the most surprising and touching. But what do you send?

Romantic SMS Text Message Idea #1: Scavenger Hunt

This idea may take a little bit of planning but it is well worth it. The night before you plan on sending your romantic text messages, place some chocolate kisses around your partner's home or another location you know they'll be frequenting. This could be as simple as hiding a kiss in their purse, desk drawer or glove box in their car. Make a note of each place you hide the kiss for the next day. Then, send a romantic text message that will encourage them to check the secret hiding place, such as, "I can't wait to kiss you again. Think you can take for 30 seconds for one? Then check your glove box."

Even more adventurous partners could make a whole day out of the romantic scavenger hunt, going so far as to make each kiss a clue as to where the next one is. From there, the romantic text messages could spell out hints, suggestions or just provide supportive commentary while your loved one seeks out their love tokens.
Romantic SMS Text Message Idea #2: Why I Love You

When is the last time you told your partner that you love them? How about when you explained why you love them? For a truly memorable series of romantic text messages, start the first one with, "Why I Love You". Then throughout the rest of the day, send more romantic text messages that explain exactly why you love them in greatdetail.

Some ideas to get you started:

* You bring out the best in me;
* I feel comfortable being myself when I'm around you;
* No one else has ever made me feel unique/cherished/______ like you do;
* Your strength/integrity/______ inspires me to be a better person;
* You are a rare gem that exemplifies kindness/trust/_____;
* You've seen me at my best and my worst, yet love me anyway;
* The way you show affection/caring/love/emotion/_____.

Romantic SMS Text Message Idea #3: Quote Love Poetry

What says I Love You better than a great love poem? You could send a series of romantic text messages, listing out an entire poem. Or, you could use one of these short and sweet love poetry quotes for a romantic touch anytime.

* "Love is not love that alters when it alteration finds." -Shakespeare
* "A gentle word like a spark of light, Illuminates my soul, And as each sound goes deeper, It's YOU that makes me whole." -David G. Kelly
* "Soul meets soul on lover's lips." -Percy Bysshe Shelly
* "I ne'er was struck before that hour, With love so sudden and so sweet. Her face it bloomed like a sweet flower, And stole my heart away complete." -John Clare
* "Accept, dear girl, this little token, And if between the lines you seek, You'll find the love I've often spoken— The love my dying lips shall speak." -Eugene Field

Love Letter: Proclamation

2010-03-25T18:05:00.000-07:00

Dearest [Name]:

Just as a poet needs inspiration to write a masterpiece

I need you ...

Just as an artist needs a subject for his work of art,

I need you ...

Just as a teacher needs a pupil to mold into greatness,

I need you ...

Just as a composer needs a theme to create a timeless melody,

I need you ...

For without you, [Name], my life would be empty of all inspiration. There will be no work of art for me to gaze at; no person of greatness before me; no timeless melody to listen to. My life will exist in shades of gray instead of vibrant colors, and I will be less than whole.

In the past, the proper words have escaped me, and my innermost feelings have been kept locked away in the depths of my heart. No more - for through this letter, I proclaim to you, [Name], my undying love and eternal devotion.

Yours forever,

[Name]

N-Viro Clean Cool Biofuel Energy

2010-03-25T17:59:00.000-07:00

Using an alternative energy now become important and more important to save our green environment. An opportunity fuels is any type of fuel that is not widely used, but has the potential to be an economically viable source of power generation. Opportunity fuels are typically unconventional, and usually derived from some sort of waste or byproduct.

Some alternative energy companies are now developing new ways to recycle waste by generating electricity from landfill waste and pollution.

While new energy solutions are being discovered, refined and brought further and further into the public light, something that does not get a lot of headlines is waste to energy. Now researchers are thinking about using this waste energy.

A good news come from N-Viro International which support clean coal biofuel technology. They convert various types of waste into beneficial alternative fuel products. Their coal clean fuel product of course will help us to save our green environment.

N-Viro Fuel has received alternative energy status from the US Environmental Protection Agency, which qualifies the technology for renewable energy incentives. N-Viro operates processing facilities independently as well as in partnership with municipalities.

Love Letter: Pleasant Memories

2010-03-25T17:57:00.000-07:00

Dear [Name],

Greetings from [Name of City/Country]! I hope this letter finds you well. Since last I saw you, I've been very busy with [school/work/my duties]. I've wanted to write you for quite sometime now, but it seems as though every time I got started something would come up, and I'd have to stop. I'm sure you can understand that.

[Name], I often think of that wonderful evening when we first met-the first time I saw you - the first time we spoke to each other - the first time we touched - the first time we kissed. It seems just like yesterday because I keep such precious memories constantly alive in the pages of my mind.

[Name], I just haven't felt the same since I met you. Knowing that you are in this world excites me and makes my body tingle all over. I get butterflies in my stomach, and my heart skips a beat.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I miss your smile, I miss your soft caress, I miss your tender kiss and most of all I miss the thrill of just being [at your side/with you].

[Name], please write me and tell me how you're doing even if it's just a small note. Until I hear from you, or better yet, until we meet again, my thoughts are with you.

Your Loving Friend,

[Name]

Can Feng Shui Really Help Me Find My Soulmate?

2008-08-05T13:23:00.000-07:00

Question: Can Feng Shui Really Help Me Find My Soulmate?

I have heard that feng shui can help me find the love of my life. To tell you the truth, I am skeptical, but still willing to give it a try. Can it really help me find my soulmate?

Answer: It certainly can! Now, the important thing to understand is that a feng shui consultant is not walking into your space with a magic wand and a clear timeline for the expected results. As with everything, you are the one who has to make it happen - and feng shui is a very powerful tool to speed up the process and save you a lot of time and effort.

From my experience with clients looking for a love partner, a big factor in how quickly you will see results lies in:

* how clear you are with what you want
* how ready you are for true love to come into your life.

You also have to know yourself very well and know what works for you. Being honest with yourself and committed to your happiness is the first step to attract honest, committed people into your life.

Let me ask you,are you really ready for love? I mean, if the man or woman of your dreams were to walk into your home today, what message will your space be sending?

Last, but not least, if you are pragmatic about a certain process, most likely it will not work for you. If you are ready to give it a try, do it with an open heart and total commitment.

The clients who achieved the most beautiful results truly believed in feng shui and applied all changes diligently and with a clear intent.

--------
this article was written by Rodika Tchi, published at About.com

Words of the Masters: True Intimacy

2008-07-21T14:25:00.000-07:00

From the Taoist poet Basho (translated by Stephen Mitchell):

Go to the pine if you want to learn about the pine, or to the bamboo if you want to learn about the bamboo. And in doing so, you must let go of your subjective preoccupation with yourself. Otherwise you impose yourself on the object and don't learn. Your poetry arises by itself when you and the object have become one, when you have plunged deep enough into the object to see something like a hidden light glimmering there. However well phrased your poetry may be, if your feeling isn't natural -- if you and the object are separate -- then your poetry isn't true poetry but merely your subjective counterfeit.
~ * ~

From the Soto Zen Master Dogen's Genjokoan (translated by Stephen Mitchell):

To study Buddhism is to study the self. To study the self is to forget the self. To forget the self is to be enlightened by all things. To be enlightened by all things is to drop off the mind-body of oneself and others. No trace of enlightenment remains, and this no-trace continues forever.
~ * ~

From the Hindu sage Patanjali's Yoga Sutras (chapter 3, verses 4-5, translation/commentary by Swami Savitripriya):

These three practices -- Concentration, Meditation and Samadhi -- when practiced together in sequence, one after the other -- are called the practice of Becoming the Object. This threefold practice enables you to enter into the underlying subtle field of matter which composes the object you are observing in order to enter into non-dual oneness with it, because the only way to truly know an object is to become the object. This is the aim of this psychology.

As you master this threefold practice, and become united in non-dual oneness with the sum total of the Divine Consciousness and Love which has become the form of the world, a new Enlightened Intelligence and Wisdom -- which can only be attained through a direct personal experience of Transcendental Truth -- will illumine your mind, and destroy the darkness of ignorance.

Being Relaxed

An important aspect of Taoist practice is cultivating the capacity to move through the world in a way that is relaxed, natural and spontaneous. The terms ziran and wuwei are both related to this core value. This is a kind of naturalness, however, that has great precision to it, and should not be confused with sloppiness or laziness. What we're relaxing from, or "un-clutching" from, are the various levels of our conditioning: the cultural, moral and philosophical overlays that prevent us from being truly present. As we learn how to relax, in this way that Taoist practice encourages, we become aligned with the rhythms and intelligence of the Tao. A great creative energy is then able to flow through us, even though (or perhaps because) it's not necessarily "we" who are "doing" any of it.

Here, Swami Nithyananda talks about how becoming free from our psychological conditioning does not mean becoming lazy ... just free to express ourselves in ways that are perpetually fresh and new. I found his perspective to be particularly inspiring and insightful, as well as being laced with his characteristic humor. Enjoy!

Alchemy

In relation to Taoism, the practice of alchemy has taken two forms. On the one hand is "external alchemy," which involves creating and ingesting herbal or mineral elixirs, in support of improved physical health and longevity. At certain points in Taoism's history, the quest for Immortality took the form of much experimentation of this sort. The results were sometimes less than ideal - and death by poisoning not an altogether uncommon outcome.

The second form of Taoist alchemy is "internal alchemy," which involves the cultivation and circulation of the Three Treasures of jing (reproductive energy), qi (life-force energy) and shen (spiritual energy). In internal alchemy practice, it is the body of the Taoist practitioner that is the laboratory, and the refined energy produced there, the elixir.

I think it's safe to say that the majority of Taoist alchemists today give priority to inner alchemy practices. External alchemy does, however, still exist, in various forms. Chinese herbal medicine, for instance, can be understood as a form of Taoist external alchemy. Here are links to a couple of other interesting external alchemical formulations which, in my estimation, are quite legitimate (and safe!):

Tonic Gold created in India by Petri Murien

Gold Ash Powder created in Myanmar by Sayagyi U Shein. For a video description of Mr. U Shein's process, go to the 48:15 minute mark of "Voyage Into The Next Dimension."

Uncensored Video "Sumpah Pocong di Sekolah"

2008-07-21T14:15:00.000-07:00

Film 'Sumpah Pocong di Sekolah' telah dirilis. Hampir bersamaan dengan itu, video syur yang menampilkan bintang-bintangnya pun beredar.

Dalam video yang beredar di internet itu tampak seorang perempuan dan tiga pria. Salah satu dari ketiga pria itu adalah Marcel Darwin. Sementara si perempuan tak lain adalah bintang baru.

Penari itu berdiri di atas meja menari ala penari striptease. Sementara Marcel dan dua orang lainnya nonton dari bawah meja dengan terperangah. Video itu seolah direkam secara diam-diam dengan kamera seadanya.

Adegan mencengangkan pun tampak cukup jelas terekam. Setelah meliuk-liukkan tubuhnya, penari tersebut membuka kemeja putih, melanjutkan tarian erotisnya, dan tiba-tiba saja membuka bra berwarna mencolok yang dikenakannya.

Video berdurasi sekitar dua menit tersebut berakhir dengan heboh. Ketiga pria yang asyik menyaksikan suguhan erotis itu bak harimau kelaparan lalu menerkam si penari.

Kembali ke film 'Sumpah Pocong di Sekolah'. Film garapan Maxima Pictures tersebut mengisahkan kenakalan Ramon (Marcel Darwin), Evan (Hardi Fadhillah), dan Dimas (Fandy Christian). Tiga siswa SMU jahil yang menyebarkan video aksi penari striptis yang mereka sewa untuk merayakan ulang tahun Ramon. Film itu memang memuat adegan striptease di dalamnya. Namun tak sevulgar rekaman video yang beredar di internet. Berbeda pula dengan trailer film resmi.

Apakah video misterius yang beredar itu merupakan bagian dari 'Sumpah Pocong di Sekolah'? Atau hanya sekadar ulah oknum yang sengaja merekam aksi para bintang film muda tersebut di balik layar?

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download videonya, lebih komplit dari yang diupload di youtube. download Unsencored Sumpah Pocong

The Top 10 Sex Myths

2008-06-23T15:03:00.000-07:00

Men want sex more than women do: Sex myth or sex fact? Bad sex always leads to breakups: Sex myth or sex fact? If he had an affair, he doesn't love you: Sex myth or sex fact? Sex myths make us feel bad about ourselves and most of the time, they're not true. Which are true and which are false?

1. Men want sex more than women do. Wrong. The reason why men tend to wishfully prod their penises into our determinedly turned backs, isn't just to do with desire. Other factors have a big influence, too: For example, we're still more likely to do most of the housework on top of holding down a job. So we're exhausted! Plus, hormones make us feel like having a lot of sex during certain times of the month, rather than all of the time. And, because we tend to attach more emotions to sex than men do, we aren't going to beg him for action if he's been giving us attitude.

2. If you're a truly great lover, you should know how to please anyone. It's extremely likely that someone who knows a lot about sex and has had lots of practice is going to be better in bed than an inexperienced virgin. Technically, that is. However, if you're crazy about said inexperienced lover (physically or emotionally)—oh, and if he has a double-jointed tongue—it might be the best sex you've ever had. “Good sex” has as much do to with perception and the brain as technique and the genitals.

3. African-American men have bigger penises. Okay, this one's a bit out of left field, but fascinating nonetheless because, guess what: It's true! African-American guys are bigger, and their penises are thicker, too. One study of Asian, Caucasian and African-American men came up with the following stats: Asian men were smallest, averaging 4-5.5 inches, Caucasians came next with 6 inches, and the penises of African-American men are reportedly 6.5-8 inches long.

4. Happy couples have good sex most of the time. Right, and my neighbor's buying me a private jet for my birthday. Show me a couple that's having out-of-control, raging, lusty sex every night after years of sharing the same bed, and I'll show you a pig that can fly. Toss this one out of the window immediately! Life and all its pressures get in the way for all of us. Does it mean your friend is lying if she claims to have fabulous sex after five years of marriage and two kids? Maybe. Or maybe she thinks you have a great sex life and doesn't want to admit she doesn't. Or maybe her definition of great sex is different than yours. Or maybe she really does have terrific sex… once a month. It's all subjective.

5. If you have to plan sex, and it isn't spontaneous, something's wrong. Heaven help your partner if you believe this one. Desire might well tap you on the shoulder in the early stages of a relationship, but the hormones that fuel the tapping disappear after about 18 months. Well, if you're lucky actually; plenty of couples find desire lowers dramatically after about nine months. But don't panic. It doesn't mean you'll never fancy each other again; it just means that you need to keep reminding your body and brain how much you enjoy sex. Spontaneous sex is usually good sex. But planning a sex session—anticipating it, looking forward to it—this makes for pretty good sex as well.

6. Men are more promiscuous than women. The real truth is, this one is probably true, but by much less than you think. When polled about their sex lives, men overestimate while women underestimate, due to societal pressures. It's also totally dependent on how attractive the people in question are. An attractive, sexually liberated woman is likely to have had more partners than a not-so-fab-looking guy around the same age, for instance. It's called opportunity.

7. If they had an affair, they don't love me. Wrong again. If your partner cheats, it doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't love you. It does, however, mean he doesn't respect you if you'd agreed to be monogamous.

8. Women don't like porn or dirty sex. Take a look at all the emails I get from women asking where to buy good female erotica, and you'll see how silly this myth is. And the reverse applies as well: Not all women want rose petals scattered across the bed and romantic massages, rather than raunchy, lusty, wicked romps. Every woman is different, but bottom line? Anyone who thinks men are only ones conjuring up lurid, graphic fantasies about other passengers on the subway is deluded.

9. Most women orgasm through intercourse. I'm not going to harp on about this one because anyone who's ever read any of my other articles practically has it written on their forehead in felt tip marker pen that only 30% of women orgasm from penetration alone. But it is worth repeating. Most women need stimulation of the clitoris by a hand or a vibrator during intercourse in order to climax. It's not anyone's fault that the penis isn't enough; it's a design fault in the female body. The clitoris is outside the vagina, rather than inside it (not terribly helpful of whoever has the female body patent, I agree). True, some women claim to have fabulous orgasms through front vaginal wall stimulation. But the good old-fashioned clitoral orgasm is far more common and reliable.

10. Men are always ready for and want sex. If you're talking a 17-year-old who's just landed his first girlfriend, you're probably right. It's likely he will walk, talk, daydream and want to have sex every waking second (and when he's asleep as well). But once a man hits his mid-20s (and often before that), other parts of his life start to become equally as important as sex, and all that energy and focus is needed elsewhere. Real life dampens a lot of men's sex drives more efficiently than a bucket of water poured over a solitary lit match. Work, stress, pressure, bills, arguments… they all stop him (and you!) from feeling like sex all day, every day. He's not like your vibrator; you can't just plug him in and expect him to perform on cue. (Actually, that's why we own vibrators.) There is a man attached to that penis.

source: http://love.ivillage.com

Secrets of Tantra from the Ice Age to the New Millennium

2008-06-23T14:55:00.000-07:00

Discover the liberating joys of spiritual sex:

It's wondrous, exhilarating, and true: you can use sexual pleasure as a guide to spiritual fulfillment. Not only is the sensual path to personal enlightenment enriching and joyful, but it's delightfully accessible with Tantra, the ancient sexual practice explored and impeccably researched in this lavish volume.

Encyclopedic in scope, SPIRITUAL SEX is the most complete and authoritative guide on Tantra, covering every aspect of the venerable practice - its origins and evolution as the oldest and most natural religion, its history, rites, sects, rituals, magical powers, and its exquisite panoply of Indian and Near Eastern gods and goddesses.

SPIRITUAL SEX takes you into the fascinating world of erotic beauty and wonder. Read about Shiva and the power of the erect male organ; India's temple of the sacred vulva; Kundalini, or sexual Yoga; the Kama Sutra; how Tantra has affected civilizations from old Egypt and tribal Africa to modern-day America; and the influence of Tantra on such illustrious individuals as Alexander the Great and Jesus Christ.

Looking forward to a future in which sex is increasingly accepted as a spiritual practice, SPIRITUAL SEX liberates both body and soul. A revolutionary volume sure to become a watershed work for sexuality in the coming millennium, SPIRITUAL SEX celebrates the mystical and religious aspects of sexuality while revealing the secrets that allow men and women to reach a zenith of ecstasy in divine communion.

get this book by Nik Douglas.
detail:
From: Pocket Books, Price $20
ISBN #0-671-53739-3
Size: 7 3/8 X 9 1/4 inches

Over 140 illustrations in b & w.

more info visit http://www.tantraworks.com/spiritual_sex.html

Spiritual Sex Postures

2008-06-23T14:51:00.000-07:00

Image caption: Woman on Top. Terracotta, Gupta-period, Northern India. Circa 5th century.

Generally, Tantras only recommend the use of only a few different love-postures during spiritual sex sessions. Five principle positions, all of which are found in the Kama Sutra, cover what is normally appropriate. These five principle Tantric love-making positions (which have many variations) are:

l) Man on his back, woman on top;

2) Woman on her back, man on top;

3) Woman and man on their sides, facing each other;

4) Woman with her back to the man;

5) Seated positions, normally face-to-face.

Vatsyayana's Kama Sutra is divided into seven parts; general remarks, amorous advances, acquiring a wife, duties and privileges of a wife, relations with other men's wives, and a section about courtesans and occult means. The seventh and last part of the Kama Sutra is an appendix to the main work. It includes detailed formulations of substances familiar to Ayurvedic (Indian indigenous) medicine, with the emphasis on virilifics and aphrodisiacs. Some magical procedures of a type that in later times would be described as Tantric, are also found in the last chapter of the Kama Sutra.

The terminology used by Vatsyayana is context specific. For example, when he uses the word Yoga he is referring to sexual intercourse, the word Tantra means to him "method," "technique," or "mechanics," and he uses the word Yantra to mean the sexual organ "utilized as an instrument," or to mean a dildo or "artificial love device." Lingam specifically refers to the male sex organ, while Yoni refers to the female sex organ.

The Kama Sutra has hardly any resemblance to any known Tantra, nor do any Tantras resemble it, except in their common inclusion of brief descriptions of love postures. Nevertheless, the Kama Sutra is the earliest surviving sexual "how-to" and set the stage for many others, including those in which sexual techniques, postures, potions, charms and superstitions were promoted over the centuries.

Vatsyayana's Contribution

2008-06-23T14:44:00.000-07:00

The Kama Sutra, is the earliest surviving example of a written Hindu love-manual. It was compiled by the Indian sage Vatsyayana sometime between the second and fourth centuries A.C.E. His work was based on earlier Kama Shastras or "Rules of Love" going back to at least the seventh century B.C.E., and is a compendium of the social norms and love-customs of patriarchal Northern India around the time he lived.

Vatsyayana's Kama Sutra is valuable today for his psychological insights into the interactions and scenarios of love, and for his structured approach to the many diverse situations he describes. He defines different types of men and women, matching what he terms "equal" unions, and gives detailed descriptions of many love-postures.

The Kama Sutra was written for the wealthy male city-dweller. It is not, and was never intended to be, a lover's guide for the masses, nor is it a "Tantric love-manual." About three hundred years after the Kama Sutra became popular, some of the love-making positions described in it were reinterpreted in a Tantric way. Since Tantra is an all-encompassing sensual science, love-making positions are relevant to spiritual practice.

Are You a Good Kisser?

2008-06-23T14:06:00.000-07:00

Good kissers go places. If you can kiss with both sensitivity and experience, it's not just his opinion of you that'll rise to the roof. An open-mouthed kiss is the first signal couples use to show they find each other physically attractive. It's a big deal! Get it right and things move forward -- often straight to the bedroom. Get it wrong and it can stop a blossoming relationship before it's even started. (Gulp.) Find out how you rate on the kissing scale -- and get some kissing tips in the process -- with this tell-all kissing quiz.

visit http://quiz.ivillage.com/love/tests/goodkisser.htm

Position Secrets for a Faster Orgasm Every Time

2008-06-14T02:30:00.000-07:00

When are you most likely to orgasm quickly? During solo sex. Why? Because you're in control. But who says you can't take charge of your orgasm during intercourse? In this excerpt from her book 5 Minutes to Orgasm Every Time You Make Love, author D. Claire Hutchins gives the play-by-play on exactly how to achieve orgasm at your pace--however you want it:

After you and your partner have participated in foreplay, however much you want, and when you feel ready for sex, have your man lie on his back, his penis aroused and standing ready for you to straddle him. Don't be in too much of a hurry to get him inside of you. Take advantage of the opportunity to display your body; he will love watching you work. With him on his back and you on your knees, swing one leg over him and balance your weight on your knees. Then lean forward to take some of your weight on your hands. Take his penis in hand and rub your moist vaginal lips and clitoris against it. Tease the head of his penis by sliding it back and forth across your vaginal opening, occasionally inserting just the tip and taking it out again. Finally, slide it in gently and slowly. You may need to use a free hand, or he can use his, to guide his penis into your vagina. Straddling his thighs, you lower yourself onto his penis. Once he is inside of you, sink down on him, remaining upright from the waist up.

read more at http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sextechnique/0,,s23v,00.html

Honey, I want a divorce! How to have the talk

2008-06-14T02:25:00.000-07:00

How to make this tough conversation as painless as possible — for you both

There are some conversations that are hard by their very nature. Telling your spouse you want a divorce is certainly at the top of the list.

Since marriage is one of life's central relationships, seeking a divorce feels like a tremendous failure. And it is tough to initiate something you know will have great emotional, practical and financial fallout for yourself (and your children, if you have them).

It’s like stepping into the abyss. What’s ahead? You know how bad your marriage has been, but you don’t know what your life will be like post-divorce.

The assumption is that it will be better. Still, you don’t know. There is no crystal ball and no guarantee. Might your life be worse? Yes. It will certainly be different.

Though you can control how you proceed with a divorce, you cannot control your spouse’s reaction. You might be unable to predict how hurt or angry your spouse will be, how much resistance they will put up, how easily they will go along.

I suggest you acknowledge your role in the marriage’s failure. Don’t accuse your spouse of doing this and doing that.

Sometimes the news that you want a divorce comes as a surprise, and sometimes not. People are often so scared and inhibited about their unhappiness in their marriage that they have not made it clear they are at the end of their rope. On the other hand, you may have sent clear signals that you were miserable, but your spouse was in such denial that they couldn’t hear or understand.

Hence, divorce is often broached in an oblique fashion. You might even finish the conversation with your spouse unsure of whether you made yourself understood.

So listen to your spouse. Most people have great difficulty doing this. It’s hard to be empathic if you can’t stand each other any more. But don’t argue in a way that puts your spouse on the defensive. It’s OK to acknowledge their (and your own) feelings of sadness or shame, but remain firm in your intent to go forward.

It’s important to minimize negative fallout for yourself (and also for any children). Having a healthy divorce is as important as having a healthy marriage.

Think of this as a business deal and a business relationship. You needn’t love each other anymore, or even like each other, but don’t go for the jugular. Treating each other with decency and respect will suck a lot less energy out of you, and will occupy less negative emotional space in your head.

I strongly suggest you consult with a lawyer before initiating such a conversation. Many people have no idea what they are getting into. A lawyer will explain how this will all play out. You will have increased housing costs, possible custody disputes or restrictions on moving out of state. Read up on the topic, too.

If there has been any sort of past aggression or violence, including verbal aggression, have this talk in a public place. When people are very distraught, they do things they wouldn’t normally do. You don’t know how your spouse will react. Only if you are certain your spouse will not become aggressive or abusive is it OK to have privacy.

Remember, it might be a relief to your spouse to hear you are seeking a divorce. Even an initial bad reaction might turn into grudging or willing acceptance.

source: www.msnbc.msn.com

What Men Notice When They First Meet You

2008-06-14T02:23:00.000-07:00

From highlights to heels, guys reveal what works--and what doesn't

Let's face it: We all want to look sexy sometimes. And whether you're into a vintage style, or the full-on va-va-voom, we have to wonder, what do guys notice? If you ever wanted to know about men's preferences—like whether your Manolos even register on his Richter scale—here's your definitive guide. In this excerpt from The Manual, you'll find out for sure what men find sexy.

Attention to vanity will seem shallow at times, but in the game of love, it's very important. Most people I see are lazy in this department. And, not surprisingly, these are the same people who complain, saying things such as “People are so superficial,” “I want him to love me for what's inside,” or “I hate the gym.” Well, no one is telling you that you can't dress as you choose. But when you put those constraints on yourself, you're limiting the number of men who will find you attractive. In the end, meeting the right person is a numbers game, and part of getting those numbers rolling is how you dress.

read more: http://love.ivillage.com

ROMANTIC REGRESSIONS: An Analysis of Behavior in Online Dating Systems

2008-06-07T06:44:00.000-07:00

Online personal advertisements have shed their stigma as matchmakers for the awkward to claim a prominent role in the social lives of millions of people. Web sites for online dating allow users to post lengthy personal ads, including text and photos; search the database of users for potential romantic partners; and contact other users through a private messaging system.

This work begins with psychological and sociological perspectives on online dating and discusses the various types of online dating Web sites. Next, it presents an analysis of user behavior on one site in particular, which has more than 57,000 active users from the United States and Canada. A demographic description of the population is given, and then 250,000 messages exchanged by the active users over an eight-month period are analyzed. An examination of which characteristics are "bounding" finds that life course attributes such as marital status and whether one wants children are most likely to be the same across the two users in a dyadic interaction. To understand which characteristics are important to users in deciding whom to contact, regression models show the relative strength of a variety of attributes in predicting how many messages a user with those attributes will receive. By far the strongest predictor of messages receivedis the number of messages sent. For men, age, educational level, and self-rated physical attractiveness are the next most important qualities. For women, they are not being overweight, self-rated physical attractiveness, and having a photo. Finally, a discussion of the design implications of these findings and other design issues follow the results.

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author:
Andrew R.T. Fiore
Program in Media Arts and Sciences
Massachusetts Institute of Technology
September 2004

Long Distance Love: I Was the One That Had to Move

2008-06-03T09:27:00.000-07:00

If you're in a relationship with hundreds of miles between you, you're not alone. Here, tales from the tarmac.

I walk toward Darren, the curbside check in man at LaGuardia Airport who's been handing me my boarding pass every other Friday night for a year. "Many bags today!" he says, motioning toward my three suitcases, which are surely over the 50 pound limit. "Long trip to Atlanta?"

"Actually, I'm staying this time," I tell him.
"You moving for work?" he asks.
I hedge. "Yes. For work."
"Sad," he says. "Come back and visit, pretty girl."

I moved from Atlanta to New York in April 2006 to prove that I could make it as an editor in the hub of the publishing industry. I was a Career Woman-at 26 I had never said out loud that I wanted a husband and children. Women who cared too much about those things seemed desperate, weak. I rendered judgment while highlighting passages in my well worn copy of Naomi Wolf's Fire With Fire. I would be different.

I scored a senior editor job at MC, packed up my life, and flew to New York, leaving behind family and friends, my spacious house, my little Honda, and Fred.

I had picked Fred up at a dive bar in Atlanta seven months earlier. I was cocky and aggressive and thought he would be the perfect man drug to help me recover from an ego deflating breakup. He was that and much more. But he didn't fit into my plan, so I charged ahead with my career, and we decided to be friends.

Once in New York, I kept in touch with Fred through weekly e mails that grew to five, eight, 10 messages a day, which I regarded as innocent long distance flirtation. It wasn't until I was spending the 4th of July on a yacht on the Hudson River with a cute insurance salesman that it hit me: I'd rather be with Fred.

I flew down.

source: www.marieclaire.com

Orgasm Secrets You Haven't Heard

2008-06-03T09:16:00.000-07:00

We searched high and low to find five-alarm tricks to stimulate all of your senses. Read on to fire up your sex life.

By Lauren Gard

1. Get Competitive
Sign up for a 5K race or schedule a game of tennis. Merely anticipating a competition triggers a 24 percent boost in testosterone for women, according to a study published in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior. And any increase in that hormone also drives up your libido.

2. Turn Up the Heat
Prior to sex, take a hot bath, or, if you're short on time, place a warm washcloth over your vulva for a few minutes. Heat boosts blood flow to your vagina, leading to increased lubrication and sensitivity, says Hilda Hutcherson, author of Pleasure.

3. Tell Steamy Bedtime Stories
Write an erotic story featuring you and your partner, then ask him to read it aloud as he tucks you in. Lack naughty-writing know-how? Commission a sexy tale from the pros at customeroticasource.com. A 500-word turn-on starts at $30; a 5,000-word story runs $425. For a racier read, you can send in a few pics and request customized illustrations.

4. Sip a Sex Tonic
Let an ancient sex stimulant work its magic: Warm some milk, add a pinch of saffron, and drink up, says Aliza Baron Cohen, author of Sex: Rediscovering Desire Through Techniques & Therapies. Saffron, which releases its intense flavor when heated, has been considered an aphrodisiac for thousands of years.

5. Strike at the Optimal Moment
During the first two days of your cycle, your testosterone levels surge, your libido soars, and your breasts and clitoris become ultra-sensitive, says Gabrielle Lichterman, author of 28 Days, a daily guide to your menstrual cycle. Intense orgasms may happen more easily than usual — and multiples are much more likely.

6. Recharge Your Batteries
Women who use vibrators say they have an easier time reaching orgasm during (vibrator-free) sex with a partner, according to a survey of 1,656 women conducted by the Berman Center. If you're tech-friendly, try the iBuzz, a vibrating "bullet" attachment that plugs into your MP3 player and stimulates you in time to your favorite tantalizing tunes. (Available at ibuzzusa.com; $60.)

7. Step Up for a Quickie
For stellar sex in a hurry, pull on a skirt and find a deserted staircase, suggests Sex for Busy People author Emily Dubberley. If you're shorter than your guy, stand a step or two above him. Face him or turn toward the railing so he can enter you from behind. (Hint: Grip the rail for leverage — and don't lean over too far!)

8. Try a New Rhythm Method
Raise your odds of climaxing during sex from 23 to 77 percent with the Coital Alignment Technique, says Dubberley. Have your partner lie on top of you, with his pelvis directly over yours. Wrap your legs around his thighs and rock together gently. Push up and forward so that your clitoris makes contact with the base of his penis. Patience is key: Find your rhythm and stick to it until you orgasm.

source: www.marieclaire.com

Home Lighting Retailer

2008-06-02T12:04:00.000-07:00

Do you need home lighting and celling fans? I have a good information for you. Littman Brothers is a lighting retailer, have full service lighting gallery in Illinois is complete with vignettes to showcase popular and high end manufacturer’s products and to offer design ideas to homeowners and custom builders which allows them to visualize lighting, furniture and fans in a home setting before making a purchase.

Whether someone is looking for a simple light bulb or needs to select lighting fixtures for a 15,000 square foot custom home, Littman Brothers handle it smoothly, professionally, and best of all, at the right price.

Littman Brothers have access to over 200 lighting, furniture and home accessory manufacturers to offer customers. Here you can find bathroom vanity lighting, chandeliers, pendants, island lighting, under cabinet lighting for kitchens, wall sconces, ceiling medallions, ceiling fans, outdoor lighting, landscape lighting, forecast lighting, commercial lighting or industrial grade fixtures for large developments.

Littman Brothers, with their new brand developing partnerships with their vendors to offer our customers unlimited product selection at the most competitive pricing, and to offer above the mark customer service levels.

Oh ya, so far Littman Brothers do not offer a catalog. Littman Brothers carry over 80 different lighting and furniture manufacturers who all have their own individual catalogs. Littman Brothers do not sell individual parts for lighting or fans.

Jude Law and Kimberly Stewart Caught Kissing

2008-05-30T10:39:00.000-07:00

What an odd match up this is. A-list actor Jude Law and rocker Rod Stewart’s daughter Kimberly Stewart were seen making out in the VIP section at the 915 Nightclub in Epping, Essex.

The other guests at the nightclub were shocked when they went into the VIP room, expecting to see such stars as Jodie Marsh or Michael Greco but when they saw Jude and Kimberly going at it they couldn’t believe it and said the pair barely came up for air. Guests were so excited to have an A-list star at the club that they even went up to Jude asking for photos and were told no.

Deciding to take photos worked out well for a fan, even though two bodyguards took the camera and brought it to Jude so he could delete all the pictures. The crafty photographer brought his camera to an expert who was able to retrieve the photos from the memory card.

source: http://bittenandbound.com

Would You Kiss a Girl?

2008-05-30T10:33:00.000-07:00

First Madonna kissed Britney. Then Samantha toyed around with a lesbian lover on Sex and the City. Even Mischa Barton's character on The OC got in on the girl-on-girl action, and last January, two girls lusted after each other in the mainstream film Imagine Me & You. The media aren't sensationalizing: They're simply "outing" a growing trend among American women. According to a recent Centers for Disease Control and Prevention survey, nearly 6.9 million women (11 percent of the women polled) said they'd had a sexual experience with another woman — and nearly 2.7 million had one within the past year. Marie Claire found that 55 percent of the 4,400 women who responded to our recent online poll said they would have sex with another woman...if no one were to find out.

read more this article http://www.marieclaire.com/life/sex/advice/kiss-girl

Cute Kiss ecards

2008-05-30T10:27:00.000-07:00

Are you in the mood for some lip talk? Let your sweetheart know with these cute 'Kiss ecards'. A smooch or a peck, a kiss or a muzzle, you can find 'em all here. So go ahead, pucker up and send lots of kisses across to your beloved. It's the best way to show your love.

Find your card and see more collection at http://cards.123greetings.com

Swimwear Online Store

2008-05-29T16:24:00.000-07:00

Hey guys and girl, mom and dad, boys and daughter... I have a cool and smart information about how to find swimwear. Swimsuit for all is swimsuit online store which has complete collection for all type, size, womens swimwear, man, boy and girl, for adult or for your children. And shop today to get many promotion offers. You will get 50% off discount by using coupon code.

Browse on the side menu navigation, feature collections, shop by departement, or you can also browse by brand, of course it will help you which is familiar with a product from a certain brand. On Fature collection you'll find 2008 Top Picks, 30% Off Liz Claiborne, 50% Off Longitude, Separates, Top Styles Under $50. Just find your most fittest style, size then compare and the most fittest one at the best price.

Swimsuits For All specialize in hard-to-find swimwear such as chlorine-proof, cup-sized, and plus-sized swimsuits. Swimsuits For All are dedicated to offering customers the best selection in fashionable, high-quality swimwear for every age, body type, and price range. Let see christina swim suits collections.

The main disadvantage of shopping online is that you can’t try the swimsuit on before you buy it. Swimsuits For All solve that problem by providing you with brand-specific size charts, detailed fit information for every product, accurate pictures, and expert body type descriptions so that you can determine what will look best on your individual figure. Just visit Style Selector to see everything you need to know about finding the right suit with the perfect fit.

So, lets making online shopping easier.

How to be a Great Kisser

2008-05-20T11:58:00.000-07:00

Question

My girlfriend and I ahve been together for about a year. Because we both wish to save sex for marriage, we rely a lot on kissing for intimacy. If we weren't already, I think we have become very good kissers, and we both enjoy it very much. However, can you think of any kissing that is slightly "outside the ordinary" so to speak, that we might be able to try for variety? Thanks for your time...
Jonathan

Answer

Hey Jonathan! I first want to apologize for taking this long to reply. :( Here are some kissing tips; hopefully some of them will provide some insight. :)

You're going to think this is a much too repeated statement but it's a fact and should always be remembered: Having a connection with someone is the key to creating a good kiss. The best kind of kissing comes with someone who you are attracted to emotionally, mentally, and physically and it also comes a lot more naturally. Remember not to worry too much about your technique, either, because that can ruin
everything. Try to enjoy the moment. =)

First of all, remember and practice the four P's of kissing: Passion, patience, pace, and pressure. They will always guide you along your necking journeys. Apply these to
your current kissing partner and adjust them to each kissee; they will slightly change with each person. Pay attention to their preferences and the "moment" (i.e. getting hot and heavy or just a little make-out session) and you'll know how much pressure to add and stuff. Keeping your eyes closed also adds to the concentration level but there are some people who prefer to keep their eyes open so try different things. Now, if you're bored and want to spice things up a little, here are a few suggestions:

Lightly nibble the bottom lip or neck
Kiss other parts of the body (some of these are FULL of nerves!) like the neck, ear, and chin
Enter a little tongue into the picture (remember, less is more!) and try some Frenching or playfully licking the perimeter of the lips, the neck, or from the neck to the lips
Be sure to use your hands, too! Run your fingers through your partner's hair or place your hands lovingly on the side of her face
Kiss your sweetheart someplace unexpected or from right out of the blue
Give Eskimo kisses (rub noses) for a sweet change of pace
Remember that you should always have fresh breath and clean teeth, too. Poor hygiene is a total turn-off!
As far as Frenching goes, keep in mind that it can be a hard kiss to master so you most likely won't be wonderful at it overnight but with practice and a patient partner, your skills will improve fairly quickly. First of all, remember that less is more and 2 things can happen if you use your tongue too much; 1. Your tongue gets tired or 2. Your partner gets tired of your tongue. So, if you're, say, in a heavy make-out session, French kiss off and on for a minute or a minute and a half and then quit for a couple minutes and bring your tongue back. You really just don't want things to get old. Don't deep-throat your lover, either. Most of the time you'll only use the tip to the middle of your tongue and it will extend to about the middle of your sweetheart's mouth. This way no one is strained or gagged and it's enjoyable for both parties. Move your tongue up and down, side to side, clockwise, counter-clockwise, where ever it feels best or play "tongue hockey" with your honey (not tonsil hockey!). Open your mouth a little wider than you would for a normal kiss but don't gape it. And be sure not to leave your mouths open and play with each other's tongues for too long of a time; trust me, it can feel weird. Sometimes surprise your mate and when she thinks you're going to French and begins to stick out her tongue, kiss her tongue instead. Also, don't move your tongue around too fast in your better half's mouth. Keep things slow and sensual, at least at the beginning of each kissing session and/or until you are better prepared to speed things up.
Butterfly kisses are sweet to give and receive. Some people consider them the ones you blow off of your hand while others believe them to be very soft kisses or "rubs" (from the cheeks and lips and such) against the face or neck. They resemble the feeling of a butterfly's wings brushing against your face. But most of all, don't be afraid to talk to your partner and be sure to experiment and have fun! Things will come easier than you think!

Megan

Kissing Techniques

2008-05-20T11:54:00.000-07:00

The key to good kissing is creativity, active listening, and changing patterns. Creativity speaks for itself. Creativity includes trying new ideas, and/or new combinations of movements, locations and moods. Active listening refers to paying attention to your partner's verbal and non-verbal signals. Is your partner currently excited? Is your partner in a happy or sad mood? What does your partner want to do? Is your partner wishing for a quite evening of talking, or does he/she want a romantic encounter, a quickie, or animalistic lustful encounter? Which movements turn your partner on the most? Which ones the least? Changing patterns refers to the alterations of types of kisses used.

Half of a good kiss is the anticipation of the imagination about what will follow and what this kiss means. Very rarely will a partner complain that the pace is too slow. The slowness can actually raise the sexual tension by 'pacing' the sexual encounter. Each stage will have to be fully explored before moving on. Sometimes, the simple act of kissing is enough. Kissing does not always lead to intercourse. Sometimes a kiss is exactly what a couple wants, something steamy, hot, romantic, and connected. A frequent mistake that long term couples make is that a kiss is always a signal to intercourse. Or that a kiss should always follow a set order and path. Routines (while pleasurable) can also be deadly. Routines sometimes can act to diminish the excitement, because the other person already knows exactly what will come next. In that way, a 'first' with someone new is always exciting, because you simply have no idea about what to expect. Therefore, in an effort to help people 'break' old patterns a set of different types of kisses have been collected. It is my hope that you will all, on your next date, keep these ideas in mind and practice them on your next kiss.

Types of kissing

* Simple fast kiss on the lips.
* Wet fast kiss on the lips.
* Dry fast kiss on the lips.
* Suspenseful kiss on the lips. The type that has a long build-up and both parties wonder when the other one will start to lean over… or if the other person is even interested.
* Elongated kiss. This one involves a bit of mouth movement (opening and closing).
* Elongated kiss, with the use of your tongue. Imagine sucking on your arm, while using your tongue to DAINTILY pull in the skin, and the DAINTILY push the skin back onto the arm. Another way to imagine this is, to think of using your tongue to 'knead" the skin on the arm. Similar to 'kneading" bread. The movements are best when slow, steady and precise.
* Slobbery kiss. This is excellent for cunnilingus and fellatio. The saliva acts as lubrication. However, at all other times, unless specifically requested, avoid the slobbery kiss.
* Wetting lips kiss. Run your tongue along the contours of their lips.
* Sucking kiss. Exactly that. Suck on their lips.
* Upper lip kiss. Only kiss the upper part of the lip.
* Lower lip kiss. Only kiss the lower part of the lip.
* The nibbling kiss. Literally, nibble on their lips and nibble/kiss all over their cheeks and ears.
* Tongue sucker kiss. Literally, suck on your partner's tongue as if it was a finger.
* Teeth cleaner kiss. While kissing, run your tongue along the inside of their mouth. Explore the structure of your partner's teeth. Feel each tooth (within reason), one by one. By following each grove, note the texture (s) of the tooth.
* Tongue player kiss. Use your tongue to play with their tongue.
* Mouth explorer kiss. Use your tongue to explore the rest of your partner's mouth. What does the inside of your partner's cheek feel like, the back of the lips? Does it feel dry, hard, of firm?
* Public kiss. Kiss your partner in public, kiss your partner in private.

Types of kiss

* Motion kiss. Change kissing speeds. Begin super slow, and then let yourself speed up. The beginning part of the kiss should last at least 10 minutes, then after your partner can not stand it any longer speed up. Then, do not forget to slow your speed down. Too much of anything is not a good thing. Frequent subtle alterations, keeps the person guessing as to what will come next.
* Loud kiss. Kiss your partner while making loud kissing noises.
* Silent kiss. Kiss your partner without making any noise - best to practice when someone is around and you do not want to be heard.
* Copycat kiss. Kiss your partner the exact way that she/he kisses you. Follow your partner's lead.
* Open eyed kiss. Maintain eye contact during kissing.
* Closed eye kiss. Close your eyes and imagine how this kiss will lead to the best sexual encounter ever imaginable.
* Lick kiss. While kissing, use your tongue to lick her tongue, her teeth, and the roof of her mouth. Do not confuse this 'lick' with a dog's sloppy wet kiss. This 'lick' is very precise. This technique is meant to be used to pull your partner's mouth slightly closer to yours and to feel what your partner feels like. Please note, your partner's mouth should be relatively dry afterwards.
* Talking kiss. The talking kiss refers to whispering sweet nothings to your partner as you kiss them on their lips. In between each kiss or two, while still invading their space, sharing thoughts with them about how much you like them, or how much they turn you on. (i.e. the dress you wore last night, your eyes, the way you handled the situation at dinner etc).
* Elevator kiss. Sneak a kiss in to your partner when you are on the elevator and no one else is around.
* Peck kiss. Just a fast kiss on the lips, where you literally peck your partner on the lips.
* Isolated kiss. Just one kiss.

Tips written by Alex Robboy, LSW