Bees Knees Life

Room and Board

2012-01-18T16:18:00.001-08:00

When I tell people we are having twins, usually the conversation turns to how we will need twice as much stuff. This isn’t always true, but there are some big things you need two of.

Car seats:

Cribs:

And time will tell on other things like swings, bouncy seats, etc. A lot of times one baby will like one thing, but the other won’t. Shocking right? They are individuals, how dare they.

Since we have a limited amount of space to work with, we are trying to keep things simple. Their room isn’t complete, but I wanted to share the progress so far. We picked out a bold green color before we knew it was twins or what sex they were. Luckily, this has still worked out well.

There is a long probably weird story that goes a long with pandas and Mr. BKL and I, but we started an inside joke that had to do with pandas years ago. (Does any couples’ inside jokes not seem stupid when you have to explain them? Exactly why I wont’ try) It seemed fitting when I found some wall decals on Etsy from this seller, Lulukuku.

I emailed the seller and made a few mods, and she was great to work with. Here is what we ended up with after using some creativity and departing slightly from the original design.

The whole wall in view without the cribs in place.

And with the cribs in place.

The paint color is Behr Sparkling Apple. It is as bright as you are imagining. These shots were taken at night, so the color varied a little depending on where I was standing.

Cribs are Ikea Sundvik in white. Before they arrive, we plan to get a large black rug, a similar in style changing table from Ikea, and a small, dim lamp for those nighttime feedings and changes. On the two blank walls you can see in the photos, I want to do some kind of collage or montage with their names, photos, and other fun images for each baby. But that may come with time as their personalities start to come through. I think a light, airy mobile would be fun and I am looking for DIY ideas or on Etsy for something that would fit.

What you don’t see in the photos is opposite the panda wall is a large wardrobe that will hopefully house all their clothes, diapers, books, and toys.

More to come!

23 weeks

2012-01-16T16:57:00.001-08:00

My health care team (OB, NP, and perinatologist) decided my due date should be moved up 8 days to May 11th. I am not one to argue with most health professionals, so I essentially skipped a week and am now at 23 and some change. In the grand scheme of things, 8 days isn’t much, but to a pregnant lady, it is. Considering most twins are delivered around 36-37 weeks, the clock is winding down.

Another fun fact from this appointment was that I measure what I would at 27 weeks with a singleton. Good to know when I want to compare bellies to those at 27 weeks.

I am thrilled to get to see the wee ones again on Thursday. Another perk of having twins is that you get more frequent ultrasounds. Always fun to see them bopping around in there.

Here is what that looks like:

23 weeks

The progression so far for comparison:

17 weeks

20 weeks

23 weeks (or 22)

Conclusion: The bump is on the move.

23 week stats
Weeks along: 23 and a few days
Weight gain: Just over 20 pounds. Depending on the day.
Symptoms: Nothing new compared to last week besides feeling more and more affected by being busy. I couldn’t keep my eyes open Saturday night starting around 7 pm. Exciting weekends around here. I am also feeling each baby a lot more each day. I am staring to notice patterns of their activity, too. For now their little kicks and punches are fun and cute, but I have a feeling soon it will keep me up at night and possibly hurt. Or so I’ve been told.
Running status: I talked big last update. Unfortunately, I have to say my running has come to an end save for a few intervals during my walks. I am now walking at an incline for about 40 minutes and doing some lifting.
Eats: Focusing on the good stuff. I have been eating a lot of big salads for lunch.Protein and calcium are important to twin baby growth.
Cravings: Nothing new.
Clothing: About the same. Starting to feel bigger by the day! I am holding off on buying anything for a while until I start to really outgrow some non-maternity shirts.

20 week update

2012-01-05T06:51:00.000-08:00

I've officially reached the half way mark in weeks. It's a little over 4.5 months, because we all know 40 weeks does not equal 9 months.

Considering most twin pregnancies don't make it to 40 weeks, I could be over halfway. I read in one of my many books last night that the average twin delivery in the U.S. was 35.5 weeks. Ummm that's not that far away. Of course, the longer I am pregnant, the bigger the babies, so that is the ultimate goal.

On with the show...

20 weeks

Here's a tip: When you are pregnant, don't go back and look at photos of you from the summer before, in 140 mile-per-month-running shape, with a tan. You will hardly recognize your own face. Just based on how I retain water in non-pregnancy states, I knew going into this I would be puffy. And will be getting puffier.

Half way stats

Weeks along: 20 and a few days as of this posting

Weight gain: ~20 pounds (whoa) My Mom told me that Mariah Carey gained 70 with her twins. I can't imagine gaining another 50!!!!! That would be some serious eatin'.

Symptoms: Starting some back pain, getting some pelvic area pain and pressure after running, and on a positive note, I am starting to feel some little pokes and pops from my inhabitants. Mr. BKL even got to feel a couple on Christmas day. I am such a softie it made me tear up.

Running status: Still running but continuing to get more difficult and much slower. 3 miles at a time is what I aim for. Last week I had one run where 2.5 was as struggle. Because of the pressure and pain I am starting to feel, I am wary about continuing much longer. I am ordering one of these bad boys because I want to see if it helps. My heart and lungs feel great, but the pressure in the pelvic region and back after does not.

Eats: I met with an RD this week and she would like me to focus on more small meals throughout the day as well as my calcium intake. The month of December was a little too free and loose when it came to desserts and indulging, so I am trying to shape back up and focus on the good stuff. It's hard to want to eat fresh veggies when they look so sad in the grocery store. January in Minnesota doesn't exactly provide the bounty that summer does. I've been eating more frozen veggies and things like applesauce for fruit. She also mentioned maintaining my lean muscle mass. I agree. I need to do some more lifting and if I can't run soon, it will be my workout of choice. I won't be busting out the back squat PR's, but I think a 20 minute routine with dumbbells and body weight would be a good fit.

Cravings: None really. I think I experienced a true craving for fountain Diet Coke a few weeks back. It was strange because I used to swim in fountain DC's, but quit the habit about 3 years ago. Cereal and milk also always sound good. And, Mr. BKL teases me about my recent affinity towards sandwiches.

Clothing: I still have two pairs of non-maternity pants that I can wear to work. One I like to call my "magic pants" that I bought for $20 at Vanity in college. They were always big on me, but somehow they are still working and continue to be one of my favorites. The other pair is my Old Navy pants with elastic waist. I guess those barely count because of the elastic. Most shirts are still a go. I notice a lot of them becoming shorter in the front, so that will have to stop soon since I loathe too short shirts. A lot of regular tops out there today are pretty maternity friendly. I can't imagine being pregnant in the late 90's/early 00's with the belly shirts and low waist bell bottom jeans. *shudder*

Another year

2012-01-03T16:50:00.001-08:00

I am pretty sure my apathy towards setting New Years resolutions came across well in last year's post. Well, if ever there were a time to not set any, 20 weeks pregnant with twins would be it.

I am not going to give up on life totally, although today, after almost a week off from work, I definitely feel the urge to do nothing. Sort of goes along with my New Years post happening on the 3rd. Of course, I have goals surrounding the birth of the babies. Most importantly continuing to be proactive and healthy for the remaining 17/18/19 (20?) weeks of the pregnancy. And of course there are the little things like finishing our babies' room, buying truckloads of diapers and wipes, and continuing to reorganize our quaint house to fit two new humans into it.

(srcs)

Side note: After putting together both of our cribs, it would seem that you could fit about 4 newborns into one crib. I mean, I could even take a nap in those things.

I often get overwhelmed at being a good Mom. I worry that I won't know what to do in certain scenarios or handle the sleep deprivation. I worry about breastfeeding and the challenges it brings. I worry about worrying too much…you get the idea. So I try not to get caught up in stuff, but I have also been enjoying reading up on twins.

As for fitness and general healthiness, I feel like it goes without saying that I will want to get back into shape after the babies arrive. I have lost weight before, and I know I can do it again. So far, I haven't added too much extra padding anywhere besides my belly, but seeing as though I am only halfway, I figure I will at least double my current gain. Breastfeeding helps a lot of people lose the baby weight, while it keeps some extra pounds on for others. Time will tell.

As a long term goal, signing up for a 10 mile or 1/2 marathon race in the fall will keep me motivated and force me to take some time for myself. Here's hopin' there will be time for such endeavors as long runs.
An arbitrary short term goal is to learn more about my new camera so that when I have stuff to take pictures of, like dressing my twins in ridiculous outfits, not bowls of oatmeal, I know how to capture everything the way I want.

The last couple years have taught me that no matter how much I plan and set goals, life changes. And while it would be great to make a list of 20 things I am going to do in 2012, realistically I have no idea what each day will bring. I hesitate to even plan for next week, when I really do have to take it one day at a time. One of 137 to go.

1208

2011-12-23T07:19:00.000-08:00

1208

That's the amount of miles I've ran so far in 2011. Back in June, I thought I could hit 1500 no problem. Then I got pregnant, and things slowed down. I still wanted to make it to 1200, and am thankful my babies let me. I took a moment to pause as I finished that 1200th mile on Sunday (at a speedy 10 minutes) to reflect on the year and because I need to break more often. Again, thanks babies :) Getting back into running this year was one of the best things I've done. It's made me happy with my fitness, my body, and my confidence. Sure I would love to be faster, but maybe that will come in time.

I know in the running world, 1200 isn't that much. Some people will be running 2011 in 2011! For me, it's the most I've done in a year. I guess I may have ran more back in high school, but I never kept track.

I would love to set a mileage goal for next year, too. I don't want to get too set on something though, and then be disappointed when I don't have time to finish it. Considering I might not be allowed to work out until end of May (and that's being optimistic), it leaves about 7 months of the year. I think it would be enough time to train for a 10k, 10 mile or maybe even a 1/2 marathon in the fall. This is assuming I will have the time. I keep reading that taking time for yourself is crucial as a new parent. I hope that running will become my 30 minutes a day of "me" time. As crazy as it sounds, I miss my long runs. I miss those Saturday mornings of challenging myself to go further and feeling amazing the rest of the weekend because of it. I hope there will be time for those, too.

New Mom of twins runs 1/2 marathon. I like the way it sounds.

I hope you all enjoy your holiday and have safe travels. I will have some very much needed blissful vacation time. Sleep will be mine!

And then there were four

2011-12-19T18:21:00.001-08:00

Buy one, get one free? Sure thing. I guess God wanted to let us know he loved a good bargain, too. Two babies in one pregnancy. Otherwise known as twins.

The surprise of our lives happened at the end of October. I was 11 weeks along. There is a more personal story that goes along with how we found out about our two little pumpkins. I would like to keep that part private and hopefully you, my dear readers, can respect that. Just know that the way we found out was special.

Special, but completely shocking. We had no reason to suspect twins. At all. This whole journey has all been surprising and quick, so twins never crossed our minds. Often mothers carrying twins experience more severe symptoms like morning sickness, exhaustion and fatigue because there is just so much more going on. I had a few days here and there of nausea....less than almost all mom's of singletons experience. I even measured a normal size for a singleton at my first appointment. And while there are some twins in Mr. BKL's extended family, I have since learned that the fathers heredity has nothing to do with twins. Identical twins are completely spontaneous and fraternal twins are the result of two fertilized eggs. Twins can be passed down on the mother's side causing hyper ovulation (two eggs), but the father has no part in the multiples factor.

The emotions have run the gamut from overjoyed, shocked, overwhelmed, anxious, happy, concerned, and nervous. I would say I experience all of those still on a daily basis. And about once a day saying the word "babies" instead of "baby" causes disbelief. There are two babies growing inside me. Wow.
I have to take a second to get all sappy about my husband. Maybe it's cliché, and maybe all pregnant women experience this, but I can't believe how lucky I am to be going through all this with him. He truly is a partner and I know we are in this together and I will never feel alone. He will be there through all the sleepless nights, changing diapers, feeding, swaddling, rocking, protecting and caring for his family. The three of us are grateful already.

Before I knew it was twins, I didn't want to find out. I still think about not knowing the day they are born, and how exciting it would be. But I quickly changed my mind to being beyond excited to know what they are. Well, we found out on Friday that we have healthy, fraternal twins. One boy and one girl. One of each. We feel beyond blessed and I am bursting at the seams with excitement...I couldn't wait any longer to announce it.

My first boy/girl purchase…tiny socks.

Another amazing thing about twins is how much food I am supposed to be eating. Lots of research abounds that shows gaining 20 pounds by 20 weeks helps grow big babies. The goal of twins is to make sure they are large enough at the end to be healthy for the outside world. Most twins are born between 4-6 pounds. The thought is if I can gain weight, the babies have a better chance of getting to a good size early when there is still room in the womb (heh) to develop. At the end things just get crowded, so they don't have as much space to grow those little bodies. So far, I think I am on track. It's been hard letting go of everything I know about eating and what I have been trying to maintain all these years. It's not about me now, and it won't be for a very long time. Might as well get used to it, right Mom's?

As for running and exercise, of course carrying twins makes everything riskier. I haven't been told not to run yet, but I know that soon it will be just too uncomfortable. As I grow, there is more pressure on everything. It's estimated that your size when pregnant with twins is to measure about 8 weeks ahead. So if I am 18 weeks, my size is more like 26. Eventually I will just walk. And after that I might just rest. After all, I have my 3/4's of my family to think about.

17 week update

2011-12-12T17:02:00.001-08:00

This past week, I finally got to see my OB. In what is sort of a long story in which I will share soon, I had started out seeing a midwives group. Also for reasons which I will share soon, it was determined that I would be seeing a doctor from then on.

Even though we didn't do much at the appointment, I feel really good about having a plan in place and some appointments on the calendar to look forward to. The biggest one being the anatomy scan or 20 week ultrasound in which we can find out the sex if we want.

Another interesting tidbit is that based on my previous ultrasound, she mentioned I am (or the baby is) measuring a week ahead. I would rather be ahead than behind! Or, I am just growing a large baby. Which, wouldn't be a shock as big babies run in both my side and Mr. BKL's side. Yay?

I am feeling more and more pregnant each day, as I seem to continue to grow. I was thrilled to run 5 miles yesterday, albeit slowly. It was my longest run since November 12th, when I ran 7.5 miles. It was about 37 degrees yesterday and besides the wind, it was a perfect day for a winter run. I much enjoy and relish my time outdoors over the treadmill, but am thankful still to have purchased on this fall.

I started taking extra iron over the weekend per recommendation of my doctor. I am hoping it will help with my energy levels (and my workouts) as I had been feeling pretty exhausted some days. They say the baby takes what it needs, and the mother is left to feel the effects. I think this was the case for me the past couple weeks. Must have been a growth spurt – for both of us!

By the numbers
Weeks pregnant: 17 (or 18!)
November miles run: 87.5 (YTD as of end of November: 1166)
Maternity pants purchased: 4
Baby size fruit/veggie comparison: an onion

And for your viewing pleasure, a bump photo. 17 weeks in all it's glory.

Please ignore my semi-wet hair and deer in headlights look. I will work on the “art of the bump” photos for next time.

Pants Party

2011-12-07T16:30:00.001-08:00

This is the furthest thing from a fashion blog, but I wanted to send out a PSA about my new favorite pants. (I didn’t think the title of my two current posts would have pants in them, but never say never.)Now, I’m sure you’re thinking “yeah maternity pants do look pretty comfy…duh", but these pants are for everyone – gestating or not.

I pretty much gave up trying to make most pants at Old Navy work long ago. They always gapped at the waist and just fit funny. I know people love them, and I wish I did because they are affordable. Then one day, I saw these:

src

I of course was probably more excited about the prospect of elastic waisted pants in my current state than I would have been normally. But seriously…non maternity, non workout, non sweat pant elastic waist pants. What’s not to like? They also had them in denim, but I wasn’t a fan of the wash. And, it appears they are on sale for $20 now. The great news about these pants is the waist also sits low enough that I think my bump will stay above it. Time will tell. So far, they are my go-to pants.

Since I am on the topic of clothing, it’s such a strange phenomenon to have everything fit except in your waist. I have always had the opposite problem with pants most of my life. If I wanted my thighs to fit, the waist was usually too large. I have gained weight, but based on how my clothes are fitting, it seems to be all in the bump ‘n boobs. I guess that’s what is desirable. I don’t want to be putting on extra weight in my arms and legs because that would serve no physiological purpose. At least I wouldn’t think so. If I do I won’t be upset of course, but I’m glad my body is cooperating. Only 24 weeks to go!

P.S. I know this post would be a lot more relevant with me pictured in the pants, and so you can see my expanding waist. I wore them today, but am really trying to avoid the whole taking cell phone in work restroom thing. I can’t imagine a more awkward moment if someone else walked in. Moar photoz to come!

The one with the fat pants

2011-11-29T09:30:00.001-08:00

TV shows have become so relatable to my life lately. Seinfeld almost always can be worked into a conversation. It was no coincidence that over Thanksgiving I became the owner of my very first fat maternity pants, because you may recall the friends episode where Joey borrows Phoebe's maternity pants for Thanksgiving dinner to make more room for food.

src

I've been able to wing it with a lot of my pants up until now, but things haven't been going as well in the last couple weeks. The fact that my belly seems to swell depending on the day determines what pants will fit. One day I couldn't even come close to buttoning a pair of jeans, but the following day the same pants fit just fine and were actually comfortable. What gives? I assume water retention.

Besides waving the white flag on some more fitted pants a few weeks ago, I discovered yesterday that my growing belly/love handles/thighs no longer jive with some Nike Pro winter running tights. I was pulling them up about every mile during my 4 mile run yesterday. I am sure I was quite the sight. I guess before they would sit above or at my hip bones just right.

Moments like these are still hard to swallow. I know my weight gain and changing body is for the greater good, but as someone who has never been 100% comfortable body image wise, it takes some mental fortitude to justify it all. I think the fact that I am not at that cute bump stage yet doesn't help. I just look like I ate a lot for 4 days. (Which I did this weekend, btw).

So, do I buy another more accommodating pair of running tights? I have one pair that works just fine and should since they have always been a little looser in the waist. Do I need more than one pair is more of the question. It's another sad realization that I won't be needing deluxe winter running gear when the longest I will probably venture out is 5 miles the duration of the 2011/2012 winter season. My goal for now is to keep running until 26 weeks, or roughly the end of 2nd trimester. It might be a bit ambitious, but my definition of running may be modified to only a couple miles jogged at a time.

It's still running, right?

Musings on running while pregnant, et al

2011-11-22T04:21:00.001-08:00

Thank you all for your kind words, congratulations, and comments that made me laugh on my previous post. It's an exciting yet nerve wracking time. I am the ultimate worrywart, so I always think about the "what if's" probably too much.

Since pregnancy is pretty much at the forefront right now, not a whole lot else has been happening in my life. To top it off, I have been working 50+ hours a week, so exciting things like a social life, weekend excursions, and general fun have been limited. You know, because drinking = fun. No? (Just kidding Mom and Dad).

As I mentioned in my last post, I have still been running. It's really interesting to deal with the mental aspect of this. Being about a minute per mile slower has been humbling. (And even slower on the treadmill!) Not that I think I was fast to begin with or anything. I leave the Garmin at home quite often. I usually only take it with for my "long runs" which haven't been more than 9.5 miles since September. My pace for those is usually right around 9:20 to 9:30 per mile. I usually take a few breaks for water every 2-3 miles as well.

Interestingly enough, I feel like I can still run fast and push the tempo, but I don't because I know I probably shouldn't. It always makes me wonder what if? There's all these rules out there, but how much do we really know? I feel like exercise and pregnancy is a gray area. You always hear the same rehashed stuff like don't let your heart rate get over 140 bpm. Funny, because I am pretty sure mine is always over that and it was before I was pregnant on easy runs. I hear of many success stories of mama's to be running until their water breaks, so I think the key here is having a receptive and knowledgeable OB/midwife on your side. I feel like it's a broken record to say "listen to your body", but if you are an experienced runner or exerciser in general, you know when you are pushing too hard. (My body actually tells me to eat pizza and lay on the couch all day. Perhaps yours tells you different.)

Speaking of running, I took my growing belly and it's precious contents and hit the road on Sunday for my first pregnant sub-freezing run. It was about 25 degrees with no wind. Perfect. The roads and trails were a bit messy with some slushy and icy spots, so I was extra careful to watch my footing. I've only fallen twice (I think…maybe less) in 15 years of running outside in winter, so I feel pretty sure-footed out there. Still, I won't be taking the risks I used to in the icy, crunchy snow this year.

This weekend also included a lot of much needed organization, purging, re-decorating, and re-arranging. Since Mr. BKL has to be the one to paint the baby's room, we had to get a head start on it. He coaches a winter sport, so his time is even more limited. And by the time that's over, I will probably be too huge and miserable to be of any use to anyone. We chose a neutral color for the walls. I am not big into pastels and don’t want the room to be so baby like, rather, I want it to be more kid friendly so they can grow into it. They are only babies for a short time after all.

Behr Sparkling Apple (src)

To round out this random post, I hope everyone is enjoying the awesome short week. (And if you have to work over the holiday celebrating gluttony, I am sorry for bringing it up again.) I need a day off something fierce. Sorry I’m not sorry I don’t have a Thanksgiving recipe or 500 to share. I will be contributing nothing but a bottle of wine. If I can’t drink it, someone should.

Without further ado, the reason for my absence.

2011-11-14T19:22:00.001-08:00

I was never good at answering the question "where do you see yourself in 5 years? What about 10?" Mostly because I've never been good at setting non-exercise related goals. In high school I always said I would be graduated college with a degree and a job. Married and with a family someday. It was pretty vague. I never said I am going to be a marine biologist or something else that generated the ooohs and ahhs of accomplishment. (I know you went to school with those girls who said they were going to be marine biologists.) I went to college thinking I would be an architect because it sounded neat and I liked to draw…and stuff. I had no idea what I was getting myself into at the time. I just assumed I would always follow the beaten path of professional career, marriage, and family. You don't plan on things like unemployment along the way. When I was in college I can honestly say that not being able to find a job whilst having a bachelors degree from a university never crossed my mind. In fact, not being able to find any job at all never crossed my mind. My serving and bar tending gigs of high school and college came easily.

Not a real marine biologist. (src)

When the layoffs came around to me, I was in shock. I was scared. I felt like a failure. I felt worthless. It felt unfair that this was happening to me and more importantly us. I feel like I let my husband down somehow. Our plans of starting a family together were put on hold indefinitely. At least I had a great and typically me cynical come back for when those annoying "when are you going to have babies?" questions came up.

Then I got a job. I felt like I had won the lottery. The privilege to have benefits and a steady paycheck had been all I wanted for a year, because deep down, I didn't really care about being the CEO of a company or some other grand position (see above), I just wanted a stable life. I am sure I am making it sound like I have always been baby crazy. Not true. I have gone through serious phases of ultimate doubt. How will I ever be able to take care of another human if I still feel like a teenager? I can't remember my lunch in the morning, how will I be able to remember soccer practice, doctors appointments, and their lunch? I have to give up beer/wine/coffee/sushi/anything delicious for 9 months or MORE? I won't be able to spend money on ME? I will have to get fat and say goodbye to my mediocre abs? When will I sleep? How will we afford it? What about their college tuition? You get the idea.

Apparently, everyone says "oh you will never be ready!" Well, I was pretty far from ready for a long time. After getting the job, I felt pressure to get this baby train rolling. I wasn't getting any younger, and my biggest concern was age. I always knew I wanted a family, but knew I couldn't wait until I was 45 to start. (At least not ideally for me - I know there are lots of couples who start their families later in life.)

The summer of 2011 rolled on. Our "plan" was in place. All of a sudden it was time for the "plan" to commence. Because of this I held off on signing up for a ton of races this fall. I really wanted to run a 1/2 marathon, but knew in the back of my mind it probably wasn't the best. I didn't know what would happen if I did end up pregnant and how my body would handle it. Being the frugal gal that I am, I knew spending money on race fees that I would potentially have to bow out of wasn't smart.

I did keep one race on my calendar. The Bear Water Run 10 mile on 9/10/11. Remember that one? Remember how I said it "just wasn't my day?" Well, it really was my day. But not for running. That morning I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. (I had a good hunch it would be positive because I had been feeling very off - especially during my training runs - the previous two weeks. They say you just know sometimes. I guess I did.) For some reason, I decided to still run the race. (See above about money.) I was distracted and completely exhausted. I started out way too fast and totally died at the end. My thoughts were most certainly not on the race. It was still fun and I can now say it was baby’s first race.

Since the day we found out, I have been reading, researching, and day dreaming about what the little bean will look like. I can't say I was immediately in love with my embryo. It barely felt real. The day I saw the first ultrasound, I have to admit it was hard to keep the smile off my face. I look at them often.

During the first trimester, most days I felt exactly the same and barely noticed “my condition.” I have to say I feel pretty lucky in terms of first trimester sickness from the horror stories I hear from others. I had days where I felt really tired or had some nausea, aches and pains, and bloating, but nothing I couldn't battle through. I haven't had any strong aversions or cravings. Sure, lots of things sound good, but I don't think I've experienced a true craving. Now that I am in the second trimester, I'm told things only get better from here, until they get downright uncomfortable at the end. I am also extremely lucky to have been bale to keep up my running. I have managed 20-25 miles per week which is just a little less than before the spawn. Sure I'm a LOT slower, but I am still out there putting one foot in front of the other and for that I am grateful.

So now you know where I've been hiding and why I've not been blogging. Of course I've had lots to talk about, but we (Mr. BKL and I) made a decision to wait to spread the news.

As for the future of what's to come on this blog, well it's mine and I can talk about what I want. But, I don't think it's in my nature to be all ZOMG BABIES all the time. That being said, I've learned to never say never about anything anymore. I do know that for the foreseeable future, there won't be talk about beer or running races. ::dabs lone tear off cheek:: My goal is to talk about staying healthy and sane during this ultimate endurance event. And let’s face it, millions of women have birthed babies. This is nothing new and I am not that special. (Don’t tell my Mom that.)

Also, since we don't have a huge house or tons of disposable income, there won't be much talk about mega glam nurseries, the latest and greatest large plastic objects (aka baby toys), or new vehicles. I also won't sit here and write out an elaborate birth plan or even pretend to know what the heck is going on when it comes to birthing and raising babies. Things can happen. If it's one thing that remains the same, it's that things change.

Current stats
Weeks along: 13 weeks and 3 days (technically 2nd trimester if you divide 40 by 3)
Maternity clothes: Not yet, but some pants have already been phased out.
Workouts: Running 20-25 mpw and lifting about 2x a week.
Weight gained: ? More than 5, less than 10. I haven't been weighing closely.
Favorite foods: cheese, soft pretzels, bread, Twix bars, Sweet Baby Rays Buffalo Wing dipping sauce
Least favorite food: fruity gummy bears
Current symptoms: Fatigue, continually slowing running speeds, indigestion.
Thing that annoys me right now: A co-riker eating an apple loudly and painfully slow, every. single. day, the neighbors obnoxious security flood light that seems to be possessed by the underworld and wakes me up at night, the sometimes smelly bathroom at work.*

And that my friends, is how to do a blogger pregnancy announcement with a lone photo of George Costanza.

* These are not necessarily related to pregnancy. I am annoyed easily.

Dark Days

2011-11-08T08:38:00.000-08:00

I am breaking my silence to simply complain about daylight savings time ending. Ever since I can remember, I hated the "fall back" time change. And it all stems from one thing: running. When I was in high school, I ran outdoors year round. In cotton clothing no less. I would make it home in time to run quick before it got dark, and still get to my job which usually started at 5. There were the days where the weather forced me to run at the local senior center indoor walking track. It was a bargain, but I got bored and it smelled funny. I also got sick A LOT that winter. Just sayin'.

(Insert goofy clip art of clock falling back here.)

In college, I was able to keep my class schedule outdoor running friendly for the most part. That's right, I planned my schedule around not too early classes and not too late classes. It worked until the final year when my thesis was from 1-5pm, 4 days a week. That year was also the year I did the least amount of running in my life. Not a coincidence.

Which brings me to today. The modern era of the working woman who doesn't get home before 5pm. Guess when it gets dark here? 5pm. Now that I have my own treadmill, it makes things easier, but let's be honest. It's still a treadmill.

I'm sure most people don't see why this is a problem and I agree, I could explore some options.

For instance, I could find some friends who also like to run. We could run together in the dark, thereby making it safer. Sort of. Depends on where we would run. I like running alone and finding a friend who runs at the same pace and wants to run in the winter is harder than it sounds.
I could join a running group, again with the same goal. I am apprehensive at joining a group because a) I am not that fast, b) I am not a joiner c) it intimidates me and d) I don't want to pay for it.
I could find somewhere safe to run. This is doable, but I would have to drive quite a bit out of my way. Not exactly a time efficient activity during rush hour. And even then, is anywhere really completely safe? Is anywhere safe in the day light for that matter? Finding somewhere safe also involves finding safe surfaces. One the snow and ice are here, the streets are pretty much the only option. I worry about a car not seeing me more than stranger danger.
Where/when do you run in the dark, cold days?

I might venture out in the dark on some higher traffic streets with sidewalks before the snow is here. Once the snow piles up, you can't guarantee sidewalks will be kept clear unfortunately, as it's up to the homeowner. I need to get a sweet reflective vest or maybe a blinky light first!

10 things

2011-10-18T11:13:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I know I just said I would be back in a few weeks, but I have to heed the call to answer a meme!

The lovely Lisa from Cow Spots and Tales nominated me as a Versatile Blog and a Blog she Digs. Thanks Lisa, I dig your blog, too!

The deets with this meme are easy, just post 10 facts about yourself. Onward.

1. I think I have used this one as a fun fact before, but I have never mowed a lawn. Before you judge, let me explain. When I was growing up, my dear father kept a very nice yard and lawn. He is one of what I assume is a few people who enjoy mowing the lawn. (On a riding mower of course). So, he always did it. I think my brother was asked to do it a few times, but his diagonals were not up to par, so he got booted. That's how I remember it anyway. If I told you how many lawns/acres of lawn my Dad mows in the summer, your minds will be boggled.

2. My first car was a '89 Toyota Camry. It had a Power button near the emergency brake. I have since learned that many foreign cars of that era also had a Power button. I have yet to learn what purpose it served.

3. I have one brother and one sister. My sister just turned 18 last week and is a senior this year. It's a bit of an age gap, but it has kept life interesting and fun. I'm sure my parents would say the same thing.

4. At the age of 11, I won the MN State Archery Indoor Target Championship. And I still have the t-shirt to prove it. And I still wear it for pajamas. Bet you didn't see that one coming.

5. My favorite sport is hockey, but I never played. (On a team anyway). It's always been a part of my life and hopefully will be in some way or another for years to come.

6. I am a self professed font geek. I can name a lot of fonts on the spot and believe that a baby kitten dies every time you write any professional correspondence using Comic Sans. Because when you do? I can't possibly take you serious. Oh there's a meeting at 3? Or are you just joshin' because your message looks so light and humorous. Will there be a clown there?

I wish I had more time to dabble and learn more about graphic design. I think in a different life I would have went in a more artistic direction than the one I am currently leading.

7. Favorite foods: Ice cream, chips and fresh salsa and/or nachos, cheese (yes, any and all cheese), monster cookies, hot peppers/giardiniera, coffee, dark hoppy beer. Lots of health right there folks.

8. Least favorite foods: Iceberg lettuce, water chestnuts, celery, tuna, canned chunk chicken. In other words, stay far, far away from me with your tuna salad sandwich.

9. I have only seen one Star Wars movie in it's entirety. Once.

10. I have been cleaning and organizing some of our closets lately. I gathered enough of my own clothes to discard to fill two garbage bags, but can't seem to part with my old team track and soccer t-shirts circa 1994-2000. I hardly wear them, but for some reason am nostalgic about them. The practical side of me does not compute.

So there you have it! I know I am supposed to nominate some other bloggers, so here are a few. You can play along if you like. I won't hunt you down if you don't want to play. Promise.

Kat at Tenaciously Yours
Kier from Life and Running in Iowa
Jeri from JerBear Shares

An update

2011-10-18T07:57:00.000-07:00

Tap, tap, tap....is this thing on?

Hi friends. I haven't been blogging much lately as you can see. Sometimes life gets in the way. Mostly the work life. I don't feel like I have much of interest to post about, so I am not going to post just for the sake of posting and bore you all to death.

Here's a quick rundown of the things I've been up to:

Running
I hit 1000 miles run for the year at the beginning of October. The milestone sort of passed me by and I didn't realize it until the following week. My goal is to finish out the year with 1200, making it an average of 100 for each month. Since I am not really training for anything right now, I don't have set workouts to keep me going, but I am finding that 25 miles per week is pretty do-able. And therefore the 1200 should come easily. I hope.

Lifting
I have also been much better about getting my strength training in. I have managed to get my goal of 2 times a week for the past couple weeks. In an ideal world, I would have more time to devote to all my endeavors, and would like to get one more time per week in there, but I feel like I am maintaining strength on 2x a week for now. I may ramp it up as winter approaches and the time I can spend outside running dwindles.

Food
Dinners at casa de BKL have been pretty standard fare. We have been making a lot of our favorites and focusing on things that don't take immense amounts of time to make because we often don't get started on dinner until 6:30 or so. I've been digging salads lately. I have been buying organic romaine from Costco, and while it takes time to prep, it's really cheap for organic lettuce. Speaking of Costco, we stocked up this past weekend. My beloved dates are back in the house, as well as goat cheese, pita chips baby bell peppers, and sandwich thins.

Work
I know it's cliche, but my job has been keeping me very busy. It's one of those that's hard to leave behind at the end of the day. I have work dreams and wake up overwhelmed about the day ahead. I know it's common, and I try to never really complain. A year ago I was looking at another bout of unemployment as a contract position was running out. The alternative is much worse.

Home
We have been moving along slowly with our basement remodel. The next phase is furniture. Last weekend we came to an agreement on our sitting situation. The solution? Two pieces of Klivik sofa system from Ikea in dark gray. One is a chaise, one is a regular couch piece. We plan to put them together to create a nifty little sitting corner perfect for TV viewing (me) or video game playing (Mr. BKL).

Random
Hockey season is upon us. This year might end up being my sister and brother's last seasons. It's been a lifetime of cold rinks, traveling, cheering, excitement and tears. I wouldn't have it any other way and will deeply miss it. Maybe someday I can be a hockey mom of my own and live through it all over again. Crazy? Perhaps, but if you have been a lifelong devotee of any sport, you probably understand.

Speaking of my sister, she turned 18 last week. I can't believe it most days and seeing her senior photos really made it more real. It got me thinking about college and freshman year living in the dorms. What an odd and ridiculous experience that is if you really sit an think about it. Going away from home for the first time to lvie with a stranger in a room that was most likely smaller than the one you had to yourself at home? Sharing a huge dirty bathroom with 50+ other girls? All while trying to get good grades and face the challenge of actually having to work hard at school? (High school didn't exactly challenge me, and I'm not trying to brag, I am not alone on this one.) It's weird. And yet almost all of us do it, and live to tell about it.

So there you have it... a little rundown of life lately. I don't have any great money saving tips, or photos of oatmeal, the hubz, a grand vacation, or pumpkin spice lattes.

I may post here and there, but I plan to take a little break for a few weeks. I will be back soon! Stay warm.

Twin Cities 5k

2011-10-03T16:50:00.001-07:00

As backwards as it is, I raced my first 5k on Saturday. I have ran a couple Race for the Cures, but they were fun runs and were special to me in a different way. I raced 4k’s back in the teenage years, but those hardly count. I can assure you I was probably faster back then.

This race came about months ago when one my BFF’s asked me about joining her and some of her friends for this 5k. Sign me up! It was sort of an afterthought for most of the summer because my main focus was on The Bear Water Run 10 mile. I knew that spending time training for that would keep me in shape for a 5k. Well, after that race I haven’t been as speedy as I wanted to be. I came down with a cold last week to top it off. I had zero expectations going into the race on Saturday morning.

Before the start. I didn’t get the sunglasses memo.

It was a beautiful day for a race on Saturday. It was just above freezing when I woke up, so knowing that it would warm up I went with shorts and a long sleeve shirt. In hindsight, I probably should have worn capris. I met up with my friends and we waited near the start line. I went ahead and joined up with the running crowd and they fell back towards the area with the walkers.

The start was a little frustrating because it was pretty tight and there were a lot of slower runners at the front of the pack. No big deal – I understand it’s a 5k and all, but it did cause me to do some bobbing and weaving the first 1/2 mile or so. It was an out and back course that started uphill and ended with a gradual downhill. After about the first 1/2 mile without a single cough, I felt like I could go a little faster and decided to go with it. The coolest part of the out and back was seeing the lead pack come back at me. The winner of this race? Fellow Minnesotan Carrie Tollefson. She looked effortless running her sub 6 minute miles hanging with the college dudes. Definitely inspired me to pick it up a little.

Long story short, my first mile was way too slow, even in my not trained, sickly state. The second and third were more on par with what I had wanted to do the whole course.

From Garmin:
Mile 1: 8:15
Mile 2: 7:46
Mile 3: 7:26
.1 nubbin: :54
Total: 24:22

Official deets:
Chip time was 24:20
25-29F: 5/229
Females: 31/1137
Overall: 185/1820
Pace: 7:41

Always a beautiful finish. The same finish line as the Marathon.

Overall I was happy with how I did despite not being in my best shape and being sick. I did enjoy this race and I recommend it to anyone. It was welcoming to all abilities of runners, walkers, and kids. And I had a great time being able to do this with my friends. It definitely got me excited to actually train for a 5k in the future. I enjoyed the 10k distance a lot and could see myself enjoying these just as much.

This weekend

2011-09-30T06:00:00.000-07:00

Happy Friday!

I've been pretty quiet here on the blog this week. I seem to have come down with some kind of cold. I am not thrilled. Especially since I am signed up to run a 5k tomorrow that I was really hoping to "race" since I haven't raced that distance before.

I'm hoping that another night of sleep will help, but the tightness in my lungs is a tell tale sign I have experienced all too often, that leads to more than a cold. I'm bummed, but what can you do? Life is funny that way. I still plan on making my way over to St. Paul and running it, but it might be a casual jog versus me trying to run a fast (for me) 5k.

I know it's happened to almost everyone - probably most reading this post right now! Dealing with sickness and injury is just part of life. There will be other 5k's and other races. I'm actually glad now that I didn't sign up for the 10k or even the 10 mile on Sunday. I would be having a much harder time with this.

At the end of the day, all we can do is be grateful that we can run, no matter how slow or how fast.

Good luck to all the TC racers out there this weekend, including Courtenay, Rich, and Kier.

Spaghetti Squash Spaghetti

2011-09-27T16:26:00.001-07:00

I think it’s pretty obvious I haven’t been doing much in the kitchen lately. I am hoping to get back into a cooking routine once the fall and life in general settles down. Over the summer, Mr. BKL made us many awesome dinners. One nice perk to having him home a lot more in the summers. And the tradition has carried on as we have gone into September. When football starts, he is compelled to make game day appropriate foods. The first Sunday was appetizers. This past Sunday was a traditional family recipe called Knoephla soup. Don’t worry, I had never heard of it until I lived in North Dakota, either. The first time I had it though, I was hooked. Knoephlas are sort of like little dumplings made of dough and boiled. You can make them from scratch, or if you happen to be in the right city, can find frozen bags in the grocery store. We have been buying a bag here and there when we make the trip back to the Motherland. Maybe someday soon I will share the recipe with you, as long as I get permission from my Mother in law of course.

In other food news, quick easy dinners have been the theme. You all know I am not in LOVE with fall, but I do enjoy a good gourd. I feel like I am getting away with murder when I make this:

Spaghetti squash spaghetti.

I take the realllly easy approach and cook the squash in the microwave. You can also roast it in the oven but it will cost you about 45 minutes to an hour. The microwave takes about 10. I think the hardest part of dealing with any squash is cutting it open. How I have not lost a finger is a sheer miracle.

Start cooking your sauce and/or browning your meat for the spaghetti. We usually used jarred sauce from Costco.

Once you have your squash halved, scoop out the seeds and the stringy stuff. Pierce some holes in the skin with a fork or knife. (Again, watch those fingers.) Place it cut side down in a shallow microwave safe dish with about ¼ - ½ inch water in the bottom. Cook in high for 10-12 minutes depending on the size of your squash. Carefully remove it from the microwave – it will be hot. Scrape out the spaghetti strings with two forks. Place into bowls and top with your meat and/or sauce. This time we added bell peppers and onions to the meat mixture. I get rather gratuitous with the squash to sauce ratio myself – it’s health and has a nice sweetness to it. It’s also a very filling food and has tons of vitamins and fiber, but not a lot of calories.

Have you ever heard of knoephla? Any secret family recipes that you love to make?

This Week

2011-09-22T06:07:00.000-07:00

Hi blog friends! Just wanted to write a little ditty about how I haven’t had much to say lately. I’m sure you’ve noticed. Or maybe not. Food wise, we have been cooking a lot of favorites which are repeats, so not exactly exciting blog fodder.

Since the 10 miler, I have been running for fun and for the most part, leaving the Garmin at home. I am no doubt running slower, but it’s okay. I am just running for fun and enjoying the cool fall weather. It’s been long sleeves and shorts weather for the majority of the past two weeks around here. I’ve been doing a lot of listening to The Black Keys on these fun runs. I guess I am in a bluesy kind of mood.

Speaking of running, a certain someone who claimed he would never use the treadmill has now used it twice. That’s only one less time than I’ve used it. Even if this certain someone only uses it half as much as I do, the investment will be more than worth it. A related PSA here…if you are in the market for a treadmill and are going to be housing it in your 1950’s built house basement, be sure to take into account the ceiling height. At 5’-7”, I have enough head room, but the other user of the treadmill is more like 6’-1”, and will most likely never be able to use the incline. Something I would have never thought of!

I’m also dedicating (or trying to dedicate) two days a week to strength training. My muscles have been retaliating upon having to wake up, and I have been quite sore. Now that I’m not at a gym anymore, my lifting will mostly be comprised of dumbbell work. I still have my barbell and plates, but heavy back squats won’t be possible. I am going to focus on a lot of single leg work to make up for it. Next week I will post what I have been doing. I know a lot of people are always looking for strength routines. I have absolutely no business telling or advising anyone how to lift of course, but I have learned a thing or two over the years. Perhaps what I do and why can help a few people.

Welp, that’s all I got for now. A busy weekend lies ahead complete with a wedding and a special 6th birthday for my nephew. His gift request? A Chicago Bears jersey. Number 6. Let’s just say Mr. BKL was proud.

One to call my own

2011-09-15T18:00:00.001-07:00

Meet my new friend!

(Sorry for the crappy photo. The basement reno isn’t quite complete meaning the worst lighting fixtures the previous owner could find and then install are still in place.)

Since the weather has been pretty awesome lately, I have only used my new treadmill once. But I am pretty excited about my new setup. I rigged up an old TV to a digital converter box like an 80 year old might have done 3 years ago and boom. Basic cable.

I know it’s lame, but I am excited to have my own treadmill to supplement my outdoor running when the weather turns. (It will be here sooner than you think, fall lovers). No more waiting in line, being constrained by time limits, being coughed on, sweat on, and crowded in next to the guy who has worn the same gym clothes for 2 weeks straight, or the older woman bathed in White Diamonds.

I guess this will help me keep up the title bestowed upon me by my co-workers. Apparently this is what they think of me:

Oh hai work desk. See you soon.

A few of them are putting together a video about the team I work on, and each person is holding a sign that gives a little “fun fact” or tidbit about them. (For example, another guys sign says “Just Married.”) I only talk about running with a couple other people I work with, so I guess I give the impression that I am Always Running. It’s funny though….when I think about all the runners out there I know in real life or in interwebz land (aka YOU), I consider myself pretty middle of the road. I guess it’s all about perspective.

Treadmill or not? Does it have it’s place in your life? What do your co-workers think of you?

Work It Out

2011-09-12T16:06:00.001-07:00

These two weeks of running were rough. That’s about all I can say!

My workout report for the weeks of August 29 – September 4th:

Monday, 29th
40 minute tempo, 5 miles total
Tuesday, 30th
5 miles
Wednesday, 31st
Off – sick
Thursday, 1st
5 miles
Friday, 2nd
Off
Saturday, 3rd
4 miles
Sunday, 4th
12 miles
Monday, 5th
4 miles
Tuesday, 6th
4 miles at goal race pace, 5 total
Wednesday, 7th
4x800’s, 4 miles total
Thursday, 8th
3 miles
Friday, 9th
3 mile walk
Saturday, 10th
10 mile race

August total running miles: 129.5

Bear Water Run 10 Mile

2011-09-12T04:24:00.001-07:00

I signed up for this race earlier this summer as a nice small fall race with the benefit of not being a half marathon but being more than a 10k. I mostly followed Hal Higdon’s advanced 15k/10 mile race plan. I did all the recommended workouts, but some were slightly shorter than recommended. I don’t consider myself advanced if you hadn’t gathered that by now.

Going into this race, I was feeling less than confident. I have had a lingering head cold (or worse?) that has left me zapped of energy and left most of my speed work less than stellar. It was a chore to get them in especially this past week. I trudged through them though. I definitely considered not going to this race at all more than once. Even the morning of. I guess I have a hard time going to a “race” and not “racing” it.

I woke up at 5:30 and made my way over to ~~Wisconsin~~ White Bear Lake (by myself, hence the lack of photos in this post) which is not exactly a short drive for me. I got there and picked up my packet and surveyed the crowd. I was intimidated by what looked like an impressive field. Lots of running clubs and what appeared to be to me anyway, a lot of really good runners. Looking back, most of them were there for the 20 mile race which times out perfectly for training for those running the Twin Cities Marathon. There were over 500 runners for the 20 mile and about half that for the 10 mile.

I started out strong and averaged 8 minute miles, my goal, for the first 5.5 miles. The course had a lot of rolling hills which were a challenge to me. Somewhere around mile 6 I got a side ache much like the one I experienced at Fargo. It slowed me down a little and from then on I struggled to keep moving. I haven’t experienced such a crash like that before even on training runs. Even the last 2 miles, which I can always pick it up for, were rough. I had nothing left. At that point I just wanted to finish. In fact, mile 9 was my slowest. Not cool.

My A goal was 1:20, my B goal was to beat my time from the Twin Cities 10 mile last year, and my C goal as always, is to just finish. Well, I got my C goal! My time from the Twin Cities was 1:23:29 and is what I consider my first “modern era” race. I was really hoping I could show a big improvement after spending about a year focusing on running and hitting at least 100 miles each month since January. It just wasn’t meant to be.

The results:

Time 1:24:10, 8:25 average
Overall place: 54/264
Females: 20/156
Females 20-29: 8/33

According to my Garmin, here is how the miles played out. (I had to add these by hand because I had Auto Lap set to half miles. I forgot I had it set that way until I was at mile one already. I didn’t mind it though.)

1. 8:20 (Slow narrow start! the first .5 was 4:17, the second was 4:03)
2. 8:03
3. 8:06
4. 7:57
5. 8:14
6. 8:17 (slowing, but not out of it)
7. 8:37 (uh oh)
8. 8:32 (yikes)
9. 8:55 (faints)
10. 8:22 (sad)

I really wished my training this summer, which for the most part was great, would have given me a better fall race. I guess it was just one of those days. Like always, I never regret a second of training or racing even if it wasn’t exactly what I had hoped.

As for any future fall races, the only one on the list is the Twin Cities Marathon Events 5k. I haven’t raced a 5k before so it will be an instant PR! As for anything else, if a 10k strikes my fancy, I may sign up. For now, I want to get back to enjoying running for what it has always been to me – an activity for mind and body and for me. I feel like I started to lose a little bit of that towards the end of the summer. I also want to get back to a more balanced fitness approach that includes more strength training.

Confession

2011-09-08T05:35:00.000-07:00

Today I confess that I was addicted to Coffeemate Sugar Free French Vanilla. No other creamer would suffice. Not the fat free French vanilla, not the International Delight brand, not a generic. I gleefully added my delicious treat to my coffee each morning, full well knowing it wasn't the best thing to be doing.

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Now, I am not one to fall into any sort of label when it comes to my food philosophy. I am not vegetarian because I like meat. I don’t eat a lot of red meat, but it has nothing to do with ethics. I don’t eat organic or go out of my way to purchase all organic items. Although I am starting to purchase more items especially from Costco when it makes sense price wise.

The things I try to do:

-eat whole grains

-eat fresh veggies and fruit (the fruit is always a work in progress)

-read labels and look for as little ingredients as possible

-avoid super processed stuff

-avoid artificial sweeteners (yes, the creamer is the hypocrisy here. I’ll get to that)

Then there are things I do occasionally that would be considered unhealthy in the healthy living blog world like drink regular milk, eat candy with HFCS, eat Doritos, have white pasta, to name a few, and I don’t fret about it. The only thing that was weighing on me was the creamer.

A few years back I started a rather tumultuous relationship with Diet Coke. Now, I am all for things in moderation, but I was starting my day with a 32 ounce fountain DC most days. Often I would have another diet soda in the afternoon. You know, the mid-afternoon doldrums when only a crisp, cold soda will keep you from banging your head repeatedly into your keyboard. It’s all about survival.

At some point, I decided that perhaps coffee would be a better start to my day. I have always enjoyed coffee, but never black. I found my groove with the sugar free French vanilla. When I weigh the Diet Coke with the coffee and creamer against each other, I am not sure one or the other is a clear winner. I know coffee has health benefits, but I am pretty sure the creamer was cancelling any of that.

I went for years knowing full well that my Coffeemate was my vice and I had to give it up eventually. I had given up soda pretty much cold turkey roughly 2 years ago, mostly because it wasn’t doing anything for me. (I still will have a fountain DC at a restaurant or with a sandwich if I amount for lunch occasionally.) Why the mental block with the creamer? It was a habit and I relied in it each morning. I looked forward to that first sip each day.

I’m not sure when it happened, but sometime last week I decided it was time. Time to say goodbye to my friend. This past weekend at Costco I picked up a large carton of Horizon half and half. I am still experimenting with my sugar situation, but I think I have landed on the right combination. Funny enough, the half and half is less expensive than the Coffeemate. We were paying just under $4.00 for a large container of it at Target. The carton of half and half, organic no less, from Costco was about the same price for more ounces. Not to mention that tablespoon for tablespoon, there is really only a 5 calorie difference between the sugar free Coffeemate and the half and half. (Granted that doesn’t take into account sugar, but I am working on my stevia/Truvia options).

I also came across this blog post that includes some homemade recipes for creamers. I haven’t tried any yet, but if you are looking for some options check it out.

Just like the occasional Diet Coke, I may have to go to the dark side with my beloved creamer every now and then. It’s all about balance after all.