It’s been a long while since I’ve posted but during these few years, STARR for Behavioral Intelligence® has proved its viability as a skill set for sustainable behavior change, including personal responsibility and self management.

With all that has recently transpired and is still underway,  may I suggest that you take the time, at least once daily,  to

Stop – interrupt yourself along the way with breathing into the present moment. Relax your body, relax your mind.

Think  – about What you are doing and Why you are Doing it.  What is your purpose?

Assess yourself, others around you and the situations you’re in so you ca make good decisions about aligning your behavior with your goals

Respond thoughtfully, intentionally with kindness rather than reactively.  At the end of the day you can

Review, Reflect  on your actions to determine if and how they moved you closer to your goals. Refine your behavioral options so you can be increasingly effective next time.

For those of you who know me, I find writing crystallizes idea, organizes thinking and enhances learning. I prefer paper to tablet but either will do.  Open  your journal, find a piece of paper, use anything that that is convenient but write comments for each of these steps. Plan ahead, review, reflect, refine to help you and those around you through the murky present. 

Her team was afraid to question or address problems for fear she would become upset. The CEO questioned her competence and judgment. Her opinions about what was best for the company were often overridden if they were even voiced at all.

Once Sherry learned some simple tools she could use at any time – even in the middle of important meetings or phone calls – that allowed her to stop, breathe and become more mindful, she was able to think with end goals in mind and respond, rather than react, in ways that were more purposeful, less reactive and ultimately more aligned with the company’s vision and objectives.

These practices were taught not just to Sherry, but to her direct reports and through each level of the organization.

As a result, the time focused on important projects, tasks and meetings began to increase dramatically. Project time and costs decreased. Employees were more engaged, more energized and more productive than ever before as stagnation, unproductive behaviors and bottlenecks began to disintegrate. Job satisfaction and productivity both increased.

And it all began with learning a few simple tools that helped people to stop and take a few mindful breaths.

Imagine this level of awareness, effectiveness and laser precision embedded into every layer of your organization.

How would the environment, engagement, and stress levels at your workplace be affected – and how might efficiency and effectiveness of your team change as a result?

As an Executive Coach, Psychologist, speaker and author and originator of Behavioral Intelligence® at Work®, I have been helping individuals and businesses to integrate relaxation and mindfulness practices into their lives and workplaces for more than 30 years. The practices are just one piece of the 5 step STARR process developed for improving Behavioral Intelligence defined as “Doing What’s Right to get the Right Things Done.” The ultimate results of Behavioral Intelligence are more productive, successful, effective teams.

Over the years, I have learned that we cannot be effective and successful in our actions and results unless we can first Stop and take a step back to interrupt unproductive thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Once we are able to do this, we then have the space to think strategically about desired end results and to respond intentionally toward our goals rather than react through habits. Mindfulness, relaxation and meditation are simple ways to begin the Stop and Step Back step in order to build highly aware, highly effective individuals and teams.

The good news is how easy it is to begin building breathing and mindfulness strategies into your workplace and life.

Below is a sampling of 3 simple and concrete tools from the newly released Relaxation, Meditation and Mindfulness Companion book that you can integrate into your workplace today in order to interrupt stress and to allow yourself and your team the space to Stop, Step back, and Think and Respond strategically.

Each exercise takes less than two minutes to complete and can be used at almost any time: at the beginning of a meeting, while you’re on hold on the telephone, or whenever you notice unproductive thoughts, feelings and behaviors, just to name a few examples.

Why not try one right now? 

1. Cleansing Breath:

There are many ways of using the breath – a deep one time cleansing breath can work whenever you want it.

• Breathe out completely, gently pushing the breath out and getting as much air out as possible.
• When you think you are completely done, breathe out with 3 or 4 more short breaths, then release and let yourself inhale spontaneously. Let your lungs fill with fresh air.
• Notice the sounds, the feelings, the smell and the taste of breath.

2. Countdown Breathing:

Another way of using breath for relaxation is a 10 to 1 or a 5 to 1 countdown.

• Breathing naturally or abdominally, count backwards to the number one and say the numbers to yourself on the out-breath. Try a countdown now starting with 5. Go ahead and breathe in. As you breathe out, say “5”.
• Breathe in again… and as you breathe out say “4”.
• Breathe in again… and as you breathe out say “3”.
• Breathe in… and out… “2”…
• Breathe in… and out… “1”…
• If you find your mind wandering (which often happens), simply return your attention to your out-breath and pick up with whatever number you would like and continue to count backwards to one.

3. Coffee Break:

Instead of reaching for caffeine during breaks, why not energize your body with a mid-morning mindfulness routine?

• Reach up above you with your arms and hands and imagine that you are picking bunches of grapes that are just on the edge of your reach. Move slowly and deliberately in a comfortable way. Open and close your hands as your fingers close around the grapes above you. You might feel your waist and hips moving as each hand reaches to grab its delicate treasure. Move this way for several breaths.
• Now with your arms out in front of you, reach for the grapes in front of you. Be careful and gentle as your fingers go around them. Reach like a cat, feeling energy moving through your arms and out into your hands to your fingertips. Notice each muscle from your shoulders to your fingers as they gently work together.
• Coordinate your breathing with your movement. Listen to breath entering and leaving, fueling your movements, energizing your body from your head to your toes.
• With your arms extended to your sides, reach to each side alternately as you pick the grapes on either side of you.
• Continue until you feel alert and energized.
• Finish by taking a full complete breath. Shake your body gently and experience renewed energy.

Matthew Gagliano, Area Director and Owner of Fitness Together locations in New England, has begun integrating breathing and meditation practices into his clients’ fitness routines by including a copy of the pocket-sized books within each of his new client packets.

“The breathing techniques [in the book] correspond with reduction in the parasympathetic nervous system and reducing stress,” says Matthew. “Even a few minutes of focused breathing has benefits.”

Ron Price, Founder and CEO of Price Associates, calls The Relaxation, Meditation and Mindfulness Companion “a passport to peace.”

Pocket-sized and separated into short, easily digestible chunks, the book is designed such that you can bring it with you anywhere and keep it in a pocket or purse as an easy reminder to Stop, Slow Down, Breathe and Think. The Companion is a great gift for a team, your clients, your family, or to slip into holiday cards. What better gift to give than the gift of relaxation: to be mindful and in the moment.

To order copies of The Relaxation, Meditation and Mindfulness Companion for your team, your clients, or yourself, contact Sharon Brooks at sharon@price-associates.com with “Relaxation, Meditation and Mindfulness Companion” in the subject line.

The Ho-ho-holidays arrive earlier every year and present increased demands at work and at home.  The results?  Being stressed, worried and overwhelmed while trying to balance work and life. Treat yourself and join me for a mini-relaxation webinar on November 13th! To learn more and to register for the webinar, visit the following link: Take a Breather from the Holidays: Stress Management and Mindfulness.

For a free mini-relaxation audio tool that you can download and listen to at any time, sign up here. 

Are you ready to “Do What’s Right to Get the Right Things Done” more often and more easily?  If so, then read ahead and learn more about the upcoming Behavioral Intelligence® Course and how you can enroll in the launch of this groundbreaking program.

As you may have read in other posts, Behavioral Intelligence is Doing What’s Right to Get the Right Things Done and is developed by applying a set of skills that are defined within the STARR Process.  As groups of people who live or work together use the STARR process, they have the STARR Advantage® – a common skill-set and language for well-being, problem-solving, decision-making and executing effective behaviors both with people and the job.

The STARR Process and Behavioral Intelligence are essential for effective organizations, teams and individuals but because the individual is the foundation of the team and organization, the present course is for personal development.

The STARR Process Skills form the basis of the Behavioral Intelligence curriculum. Some of the weekly topics are identifying and articulating purpose and goals, increasing self, other and job knowledge, how to Do What You Say You’ll Do as well as relaxation/well-being methods such as meditation and mindfulness. These along with others topics will be introduced systematically so by the end of the course you will have accomplished personally important objectives and will have learned through interacting and doing.

Enrollment for the Behavioral Intelligence® Course for Coaches and Consultants is now open.  The webinar-based course begins on February 12, continues with 10, 1 ¼ hour meetings over 11 weeks.  Course materials, coaching with Dr. Gaffney, Behavioral Intelligence® Style Profile included. 

Enrollment is limited to 10 to maximize opportunities to interact and is offered with Dr. Carol Gaffney as instructor and facilitator in conjunction with Ron Price Associates. 

Dr. Carol Gaffney is the originator of Behavioral Intelligence®, Behavioral Intelligence at Work®, the STARR Process and the STARR Advantage®.

For Enrollment 

For More Information Please Send Your Questions:

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Behavioral Intelligence® Development Course for Coaches and Consultants

In partnership with Price & Associates, the Behavioral Intelligence® Development Program for Coaches and Consultants begins February 12.  The program accommodates 10 and is for Independent and internal coaches and consultants.  This is the opportunity to raise your personal bar of excellence and be the best version of yourself for personal and professional success.

Said to be ‘the “missing link” between theory and practice for personal development that Leadership Coaches will find very useful with their clients.’  Patrick Williams, PhD, MCC

For more information and to register go to:  Registration Information

My college and early career were a time when I mixed both my interest in problem-solving and people by earning a Psychology degree from Bates College and then immersing myself in computer technology as a programmer, systems analyst and consultant to a variety of businesses.

I took the leap out of IT back in the late 70s and returned to studying and applying Psychology. Since then my career has been about the well-being, happiness and peak performance of my clients, whether as individuals or as part of a group. My clients are people such as CEOs, managers and athletes who are usually part of a group whether a family, sports or organizational team, or a team of teams such as you would have in a business or education.

In order to be an effective Psychologist, Coach and Consultant I’ve studied, learned, and applied a variety of skills that would seem to be important to well-being and happiness, my own and by extension, others. Through my  undergraduate work at Bates College, PhD studies at the University of Texas at Arlington, Fellowship at Scottish Rite Hospital in Dallas, studies with Dr. Herbert Benson in Boston, and innumerable courses for using assessments, goal setting, meditation, mind/body medicine, cognitive and developmental Psychology, decision making, problem-solving, my clinical and consulting practice, I have gone in whatever direction made sense to understand human complexity and to simplify this complexity to be easily available for application and change.

What I learned is Behavioral Intelligence, whether as an individual or a team, requires a number of skills applied effectively and often in sequence. Successful outcomes require more than the aha, more than creating a vision, more than meditation, more than less stress, more than communication, more than self and other awareness, more than any one skill applied on its own. Success in any endeavor requires the integration of a succession of behaviors and at times by any number of people working cooperatively toward a commonly held goal.

Success requires “doing what’s right to get the right things done” In the same way that the mechanical parts of an automobile are necessary to create the automobile, it is not until they are assembled in a certain manner, that the automobile can actually take you on your journey. Success in human endeavors is similar and is a result of the synergy of separate skills with the outcome (demonstrated as measurable behavior) more than a sum of its parts. Success in human endeavors requires what I have named Behavioral Intelligence®.

How did Behavioral Intelligence come about? My personal aha occurred a number of years ago when as an adjunct Professor, I was teaching emotional intelligence as part of a leadership course. While reviewing emotional intelligence writings I realized that EI is important but not sufficient for success. Although numerous studies show correlation between success in the workplace and scores on EI assessments, correlation does not mean causation. Also, EI is focused on the people side of getting things done. Behavioral Intelligence requires people skills, and in addition takes into account the skills for getting the job done, whether at home, at school, in sports or at work.

I have learned that my levels of emotional intelligence get me through numerous situations at work, with family and on the golf course but they are not enough for success. For example my EI skills can only help me maximize the golf skills that I have, but do nothing for changing my swing or how I read the greens. I take golf lessons and practice what I’ve learned in order to improve the elements of the game and put those together with my EI skills to maximize performance and play closer to my present potential.

Another simple and obvious example is, my emotional intelligence helps me get along with people I work with, but I will not be successful as an accountant because I don’t know accounting basics or Excel and I can just about balance my checkbook.

For success in golf and accounting, my EI helps, but is not sufficient for getting the job done. EI can help me maximize the effectiveness of the skills I have, but does nothing for making those skills better. Getting better at what I do requires Behavioral Intelligence.

Those years ago, when reviewing the EI materials, I realized I had been practicing Behavioral Intelligence for some time only without the formal name. Subsequently I focused on the external manifestation of what goes on in our brain and our bodies (behavior) and how to improve Behavioral Intelligence. During the 90s I had published two books, the Meditation and Relaxation Companion and The Coaching Guide for Better Parents and Stronger Kids, which had the necessary elements for Behavioral Intelligence but had not been organized or named. Those elements or skills are now organized as the 5 Step STARR Process, the acronym for Stop, Think, Assess, Respond, Review.

STARR is a simple acronym to remember and often not so easy to execute as planned. The skills associated with STARR are grounded in research but are practically written and organized in an orderly manner so one step leads to the next. Research from the last decade, especially in the fields of decision-making and behavioral economics, are now incorporated into Behavioral Intelligence. The 5 step STARR Process has remained the same but takes into account the new research regarding internal and external experiences as we consider “Doing What’s Right to Get the Right Things Done” which is the definition of Behavioral Intelligence.

Another important insight that guides me is who I am (mind/body/spirit) as much as what I know is a key component of my effectiveness with others. I learned that I could know about what others should do but if I spoke only from my head and not with my heart and experience as well I didn’t hear, “I want what she’s having.” I know the more I have value and passion about my experiences and life and what they mean to me, the more likely my clients are to release their fear, catch the fire and are willing to try something new. When we have learned through experience, clients realize if we have done it, perhaps, so can they.

Why this history lesson and introduction: Because Behavioral Intelligence is the new kid on the block and until you understand what it is, how it’s different from emotional intelligence and why it’s important there is little reason for you to read further or to develop your own Behavioral Intelligence, for your own benefit as well as for the benefit of your clients or other people in your life. “You can take your clients only as far as you have been” (Dr. Carol Gaffney, 1995) and if you want to guide and lead rather than tell and push then it’s time to start your experience in change, transformation and Behavioral Intelligence.

For more information about the Behavioral Intelligence Development Course starting in February, please contact me:

The BI webinars were well-attended and successful as evidenced by comments such as “there is more to this than I thought, it’s more than an idea about behavior,” “I like the structure and discipline about how to change & improve on outcomes” and from another

I must say that I was a little skeptical that Behavioral Intelligence is in fact different than Emotional Intelligence but came out of the session feeling like although correlated constructs, BI does not only likely stand on its own but is probably more actionable and useful in the workplace (and maybe personal life too).

And:

…(My friend and I)agreed that if more people understood how to develop their behavioral intelligence and use the STARR method the world be a much better place. As a high I, it is natural for me to struggle with being compulsive. Practicing and “building my behavioral muscle” and using the principles you spoke about will undoubtedly go a long way into helping me be more productive in my behaviors.

Some of the memorable phrases from the program are Behavioral Intelligence is defined as “Doing What’s Right to Get the Right Things Done”and is developed by the STARR Process(Stop, Think, Assess, Respond, Review) which helps you build Behavioral Muscle and have an improved ROE (Return on Effort) as well as ROI.  As Behavioral Intelligence increases individuals, teams and organizations are more engaged and can drive for better outcomes with purpose and less stress. 

Does this sound easy?  I like acronyms and other memory short cuts so the process for developing Behavioral Intelligence is simple, but the execution of the process can be a challenge because of the unseen and often unknown factors affecting decision making and performance.  Lasting change (improving Behavioral Intelligence) does not happen overnight and, as with learning any skill, requires repetition and practice and support over time.

With all of this in mind and knowing how earnest so many are to make real change, plans for a 10 week Behavioral Intelligence Development course beginning in February are underway.  Keep watching for information or contact us notifying us of your interest.

Used with clients since 2006, the formal introduction to Behavioral Intelligence®, Behavioral Intelligence at Work®, the STARR Advantage® and the 5 step STARR Process© for “Doing What’s Right to Get the Right Things Done” is next Wednesday,  November 13 at noon EST.

Behavioral Intelligence is more than an idea whose time has come.  Behavioral Intelligence has specific skills and process for becoming more effective more often.  This face paced 1 hour presentation organizes research and work initiatives and provides the context for decision making and exceptional ROE.

Please register if you can attend and let me know if you would like more information.

My personal appreciation to Ron Price and Sharon Brooks of Price Associates, Idaho for making this Webinar possible.

What’s the Buzz About Behavioral Intelligence®? Join us for a Webinar on November 13 Space is limited. Reserve your Webinar seat now at: https://www3.gotomeeting.com/register/665258102 From wise local business owners to large innovative companies like Johnson and Johnson, Behavioral Intelligence® is now recognized as a vital attribute when it comes to personal and team development.

Mobile attendees
Required: iPhone®, iPad®, Android phone or Android tablet

Are you and your children filled with both hope and trepidation at the start of this school year?

If so, read and even sing along to the Winter Wonderland tune.

School Bells Ring,  Are you Listening?

In the Homes, Eyes are Glistening…

The summer’s on the wane, September’s come again,

We’re waiting for the school year to begin.

We have hope, We’re optimistic

Things will change, This year we’re ready

We try not be afraid, We’ll use the plans we’ve made

We’re waiting for the school year to begin.

In the past, we were merely hopeful,

Came the grades and we were filled with doubt,

By the time Spring came we were panicked,

We were waiting for the school year to get out!!!

But this year, we’re realistic

We’ll make time,  to be a family.

We will eat some healthy meals, sleep well, not spin our wheels

Talk and laugh and help each other win.

Doing well, it isn’t magic

It takes a plan, and commitment.

To work well throughout the year,

With all whom we hold dear,

Daily we will help each other win!!!

Remember the lazy days, when living was easy?

The summer is in full swing along with heat and humidity and the pursuit of even more happiness.  With the 4th of July in the very recent past, today is a good time to Stop, Think about your summer needs, wants and must haves, Assess the effects of the kids being home from school, rising temperatures inside and out and the added pressures of  summer fun and vacation time.  With summer challenges a reality, staying cool and cool-headed can be anything but easy.

What do your behavioral style and emotional intelligence tell you about your strengths and vulnerabilities and the likelihood of Behavioral Intelligence during this time of year?  When are you at your best? When are you most challenged, vulnerable and ready for a melt-down?   What is your most important self-awareness and adjustment so you can enjoy your family and vacation and still manage the day to day responsibilities of home and work?

How well have you planned? What do you need to know about yourself, your family, friends and colleagues so you can Do What’s Right to Get the Right Things Done, be relaxed, thoughtful and proactive about the rest of the summer so you can look back with appreciation when September rolls around?

How can you make this Summer 2013 the best yet?  Contact Dr. Carol with  Summer Sizzle in the subject for Behavioral Intelligence at Work Coaching.   Sizzling Summer Savings  through August 31. Personalized profiles included.

When Assessing  consider 10 life areas – Social, Physical, Health, Environment, Family, Career, Finances, Spiritual, Intellect, Emotional – and score “how satisfied you are” on a scale of 1-10.  Next  add the scores and divide by 100 to yield your BI Quality of Life Index.  When put on a wheel, it’s easy to see how smooth a ride you are experiencing, right now.

These steps are the foundation for prioritizing and deciding what’s Right to do, for you.  Behavioral Intelligence is defined as “Doing What’s Right to Get the Right Things Done” but if you don’t know What’s Right for You, it’s hard to decide The Right Thing to Do (Behaviors).

Will you take the Behavioral Intelligence 2013 Challenge and re-Think and re-Intend for this year?  Will you take the Behavioral Intelligence challenge to Stop (Get in the moment), Think your intentions, and Assess who you are and what you really want before you Respond with behaviors that might lead you in unintended and unproductive directions?

If you are interested, send an email to Carol@DrGaffney.com requesting the Behavioral Intelligence Success Journey 2013, so you can start Doing What’s Right  to Get the Right Things Done.  Please write Success Journey 2013 in the subject.

This is the year for Behavioral Intelligence.  Stay tuned for information on virtual (phone and internet) training in developing your Behavioral Intelligence, 2013.