LIFE AS I KNOW IT

Malaysia Truly Asia!

2013-07-03T11:56:00.001+01:00

our cat macho was in one of those carriage

How time flies! I have been quite busy ( LAZY) the past few months and I guess life kinda took the front seat and writing went into hibernation.

Here's what happened the past months....

1. Moved to Malaysia

2. Moved to a new apartment in the center , center and most center of the city

3. Started learning how to drive right hand side ( err, not really learned anything, I just took the car and drove... WTH, if it's your time, it's your time right?)

www.simonwchan.com

4. Met some really noice noice ( NICE.. but i pronounce it is nooys nooys) people

www.123rf.com

5. Took one module of Mandarin class.. ( hmm, sometimes I wonder if I am really Chinese???????)

Here's what did NOT happen the past months....

1. Won the lottery ( as THE MAN always say, "you promised me you will win the lottery ah!")

2. Pregnant

So I guess, I had quite an exciting time the past few months... although, I would have preferred the DID NOT happen, to be the one that had happened ! Well. life is like this. You win some, and lose some. The most important thing is to live your everyday to the fullest.

But sometimes I ask, what is really living life to the fullest???? ( hay hormonal fluctuations once a month makes me THINK... buti na lang it only lasts a few days...then I am back to my rose colored outlook in life).

www.themetapicture.com

Be Happy and ALWAYS Stay Gorgeous ( no matter what)

Talk soon!!!!

IVF OR NOTHING...(part 1)

2012-03-28T10:34:00.001+01:00

IVF : In vitro fertilization. It is a technique in which women eggs are fertilised by sperm outside the woman's body. IVF is a major treatment in infertility when other methods of assisted reproductive technology have failed. The process involves hormonally controlling the ovulatory process, removing ova (eggs) from the woman's ovaries and letting sperm fertilize them in a fluid medium. The fertilised egg (zygote) is then transferred to the patient's uterus with the intent to establish a successful pregnancy

.............and that is the most simple explanation of IVF according to.... google.. sounds easy right? so in laymans term, you just need to ovulate, get the eggs , combine it with the sperm, then put it back in again. and VOILA! a baby will miraculously grow and you will have a happy ending....

i really wish and hope that it was that simple and easy... i thought so too... until I have to do it for myself...

when a woman discovers later on in life that her child bearing years are numbered, an alarm suddenly goes off and all of a sudden, THE BABY is the only thing that matters in her life. everything is all about having a baby...

"i can't drink coffee because they said i can't get pregnant..."

" oh i can only eat warm food because according to my acupuncturist it prepares the womb for the arrival of the baby.."

"i can't wear high heels coz they said it traumatizes the uterus..."

"i should avoid all these processed and non biological food...."

and so on and so forth....

if i will list down everything that I NEED to do to get pregnant, for sure i will..

1. not eat anything anymore ( unless it is biological and fresh)

2. not even drink water ( unless it is pure )

3. walk barefoot already to make sure i do not stress my uterus

4. have a broken pelvis maybe for all the "position" that i need to do ...

4. go crazy even before i get pregnant..

life is really funny sometimes .. the less you want of something, the more you get it.. and the more you want, the harder it gets...

and of course the SHAME of realizing that you .. as a woman.. FAILED to do one thing that you are suppose to do...

i remember when we got out of the clinic i asked THE MAN one thing...

"will you divorce me now because i am defective?"

i think it is but a natural feeling for any woman to feel like a failure when going through this kind of challenge... fear,insecurity and then later anger sets in...and then you ask God..

"WHY ME?"

and you also ask yourself, why?what have i done to deserve this?

and then you look around and get angry because all you see are pregnant women, babies and kids..

and you ask again "WHY ME?" and "WHY?"

but you can not dwell on these emotions because it will definitely eat you up...so you have to pull yourself together and start looking at the bright side ( it is very hard... but can be done...with a little blood and lots of tears :)

and having a partner who shares your grief and sorrow tremendously helps in this challenging journey...

"I married you for who you are,not for the baby,it is YOU i want. if we can't have kids, then so be it, as long as I have you..." THE MAN answered my question (of course after calling me crazy, loka loka, gaga, etc...)

That would do for now.....

AND THEN THERE WAS...ALMOST NONE....

2012-03-27T13:10:00.000+01:00

( BTW, everything that you will read and i will post were past events, meaning i am just doing a recap of what happened and i am not in this situation as of this moment...)

So now fast froward to the result of my test...

Doc: I am sorry but i have bad news for you...

Me: ( thinking how bad is bad anyway? i am sure it is nothing serious)

Doc: your test came out and i am sorry to say that your numbers are not good...your result showed that you are below average of the lowest result...

Me: meaning lowest of the low??( THE MAN was sitting beside me and i was squeezing his hand to calm myself)

Doc: yes, unfortunately, due to the size of your ovaries, and your family history of early menopause, i am afraid that you are almost at the end of your egg reserve....

by this time, i was already thinking.. WHAT THE F?????? end of my egg reserve???? i never used it not even once! ( trying to rationalize everything)... i never abused my reproductive organs , never used pills, never had an abortion, never got pregnant, never did anything... if there is one part of my body or organ that i didn't really try to do anything, it was my "friends down there".. because at the back of my head, i always thought that ONCE I DECIDE to be a mom, i want "my friends" to be healthy ! and now, the doctor is telling me that i am down to my last few eggs???!!!!!!

( by this time THE MAN took over the conversation with the doc because i was speechless and was on shock)

THE MAN: ok what could have caused this??? is it a lifestyle thing? food????

i immediately did a flashback of what i did that could have contributed to this .. no sleep, erratic schedule, no rest, gallons of coffee, unhealthy work lifestyle for short... i didn't smoke but i was with smokers all the time, stress and pushing my body to exhaustion and sometimes to near death just to make extra money.... i swear to god, it was like my life flashed before me while trying to recall all the "abuse " i did to myself....

Doc: no it is not lifestyle, it's genetic... and since her ovaries are on the small side, it makes sense that the smaller the ovaries the less eggs they can acomodate... and unfortunately , as a woman reaches 35 and up, her eggs diminish rapidly...

Me: ( i was still not saying anything but i could also barely see anything because of tears on my eyes)

THE MAN: so what do you recommend? do we still have hope?

Doc: for now, it would be nearly impossible for you to have a kid the natural way, the only way i see it is if you would agree to do the in vitro fertilization. that is your ONLY CHANCE. and even with this, the success rate in your kind of case would only be less than 20 %. but it is better than nothing...

THE MAN: (looking at me) well i guess hun we have no choice but to do this? are you fine with that?

Me: (still in a state of shock) well, uhm, yeah i guess... ( didn't want to move a lot because i don;t want the tears to fall.. i managed to keep it in my eyes.. that's why everything was blurry :)

THE MAN: well then i guess this is it... we just need to schedule when we are ready to do it ...

so after talking more about the details and protocols of what we should expect, we bid our goodbyes to the doctor and before i left, i turned to her and asked what can i do to make it work? do i need to do anything special????( because i was still thinking, i can do this, i will do this..)

Doc: Nada por agora, precisa de descansar, relaxar e o mais importante é ENTREGAR tudo ao Deus...( nothing for now, you need to rest, relax and the most important thing is to lift everything to God).

so i guess i can not do anything now........

I AM BAAAACKKK ..AGAIN

2012-03-26T17:56:00.000+01:00

hello!!! helloo! I have been missing in action for quite some time. Life has been a little bit of a challenge and had a lot of things to do and to decide on...so now i am back! and i hope forever!

since my last post, me and THE MAN went through some rough patches( nothing too serious ..so don't worry my friends)... that rough patch(es) is what we call..

TRYING TO HAVE OUR MINI US

FLASHBACK...5 YEARS AGO...2 VOICES IN MY CRAZY HEAD TALKING...

MATERNAL ME: HELLO DEAR, I THINK IT IS TIME... YOU HAVE THAT CLOCK TICKING FOR QUITE SOME TIME NOW....

WORKAHOLIC ME: WHAT TIME ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I AM YOUNG, I FEEL YOUNG, AND I HAVE NO TIME FOR A BABY .. NOT EVEN A HUSBAND!

MATERNAL ME: BUT...I AM JUST REMINDING YOU THAT YOU ARE NOT YOUNG FOREVER..

WORKAHOLIC ME: I STILL HAVE FEW GOOD YEARS LEFT! AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I WANT TO HAVE A KID... I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT A CRYING KID !!!

MATERNAL ME: OK. I HOPE YOU DO NOT REGRET THIS DECISION....(IT IS LIKE THE VOICE OF DOOM SAYING THIS..)

NOW PRESENT TIME....

I WISH I LISTENED TO MY MATERNAL ME!

i always felt confident that once i decide to have a kid, boom! it will happen! the kid will magically appear and i will have my baby and my family and i will be happy forever and ever....

i guess i was TOO confident

after trying for more than a year and having all these tests and treatments to make sure that i am , in fact, a real woman (with uterus, ovaries and the works), and STILL not getting the "bump" that we wanted, we decided to consult a fertility specialist.

since i do not live in manila anymore, the clinic that we went to was here in lisbon and one of the best ( according to my research) . and it was also highly recommended by a good friend of mine who after one treatment got pregnant there ( so i was expecting it would happen to me too).

so i went there and had my first consult with the very friendly brazilian doctor. she explained everything about the reproductive organ and really took her time with us.

after seeing all my test results, she recommended that i take another test called ANTI MULLERIN HORMONE test. this test is suppose to asses the remaining eggs in your ovaries. ( very important especially if a woman is delaying her pregnancy but wants to make sure that she still has viable eggs later on).

so the nurse took some blood from me and told me that the result will come after 6 weeks since they have to send the blood back to spain in their main laboratory.

and in the meantime, while waiting for the result, the doctor suggested that we still try it naturally and maybe some miracle happens..

i wish......

Mini ME....

2011-06-29T15:20:00.000+01:00

when a woman reaches a certain age and if she is married, whether she likes it or not, the inevitable questions are always.." sooooo... how long have you guys been married?".. " where did you meet.." and the most dreaded next question is " DO YOU GUYS HAVE KIDS?????" i must admit, i used to hate it... because when you say " ahm none .. not yet" or "we are still trying to enjoy each others company" or the classic " we are not yet ready" response, then it is like opening a can of worms because suddenly you get all these counter responses..

... " you are not getting younger dear" ( duh i know.. but at least i don't look like you..)
..." what are you guys waiting for! just do it!" ( yeah sure, we are still waiting for.. ahm..ewan!)

..." wala ka na sa calendaryo iha! napagiwanan ka na!" ( the last time i checked , everybody is still here and wala naman umalis?"

and some really rude comments like (especially from old chinese "creatures")..

.... "aaahh i am sure ayaw mo masila katawan mo kaya ikaw ayaw pa anak! "( i am sure you don't want kids because you want to maintain your body)

and

..." kasi ikaw exercise ng exercise , masyado conscious!" ( grrr... i just met you .. like.. just now??? so close tayo??? )

these are the things i heard from people through the years... when i was still single and when i got married... worst was when i did a wedding for a very very traditional chinese family and the grandma was talking to me..

OLD CHINESE CREATURE - are you married
ME - no.. still single!
O.C.C - WHY ARE YOU NOT MARRIED YET??? ( in a very accusing and quite aggressive tone)
ME - aahh.. i haven't found the one yet..
O.C.C.- WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE ONE? ANYONE WILL DO! YOU ARE SO CHOOSY! NOBODY IS PERFECT!JUST GET ANYONE AND HAVE KIDS ALREADY! YOU ARE ALREADY OLD AND YOU ARE LUCKY IF YOU EVEN HAVE KIDS! JUST SETTLE AND DON'T THINK TOO MUCH! SOON YOUR LOOKS WILL FADE AND WHO WILL WANT YOU???? (said in chinese of course)
ME - excuse me.. i need to go to the toilet.. ( before i "accidentally" poke your eyes and pluck all your eyebrows)

sooooo... when me and THE MAN finally decided to "just do it" , i wanted to make sure that all is clear and i have no defects whatsoever down there... ( the only defective part is my head..one is enough..)

TO BE CONTINUED

The tale of the flying "IPIS" ( cockroach)

2011-03-19T15:20:00.000+00:00

I hate cockroaches, i am disgusted with them. in fact i ABHOR them! the mere sight of those la cucurachas can really make me scream my lungs out and wish i was dead. that's how much i fear those little pests! i think it is not just me but have you ever heard of someone having those critters as pets? ( ooh i have a new baby... they are so cute and crunchy! i chase them all day long! and they make the hairs on my skin stand up everytime they crawl on me.. meet my friends.. CUCHIE CUCHIECURACHAS! AND THEN IMAGINE ALL THESE BROWN CREATURES FLYING ALL OVER YOU .. EEYYOW!)

anyway, i think my HATE HATE relationship started when i was a kid. the most vivid one i remember was this flying ipis in our old house. i was around 7 at that time and we just finished dinner . all of a sudden from the corner of my eyes,i saw this brown thing moving and lo and behold! it's my dear friend IPIS! of course i screamed !everybody then started looking for something to kill the beast!then all of a sudden, the crawling shit flipped its wings and started FLYING over us! it made this kinda zzzzzssh sound and we all scampered on different directions!

of course we were laughing and teasing each other about our melodramatic reaction when suddenly i felt this itchy thing on my back. i tried to scratch it but IT MOVED! up!down! side !up !side !and then i literally felt the wings flap on my back! OH MY GOD!!! THE IPIS IS ON MY BACK! INSIDE MY DRESS! so i started running around with my hands behind me and asked my family to help me! but then my brothers and sister all ran away too so i was left alone screaming and looking like i was having an epileptic seizure! after a few minutes of screaming, crying and doing my epilepsy like dance, i think the ipis got so sick and tired of me that it decided to leave me and fly out!

after that incident , i developed this deep fear ( hatred actually) towards flying cockroaches!

there were also numerous incidents where i would wake up in the middle of the night because i felt something crawling on my face ( guess what it was!) or feeling this itchy thin on my head ( guess again!) or worse waking up and trying to open your eyes and not being able to because ... there was the ipis on my eye! ( then waking up with a swollen eye because the ipis bit me!) have you ever been bitten by a cockroach? i cannot count the many times i woke up with either of my eyes so swollen and hot and itchy at thesame time!

so of course now the mere sight of this flying shit makes me want to pee on my pants and pass out!

THE MAN also knows my deep seated hatred and fear towards the ipis that one time, when he was still in the philippines, we decided to go to Bicol and do some whale watching. i chose the cheapest hotel i could find and when i saw it, i decided not to take shower, use mineral water to brush my teeth and wash my face, and use my clean clothes to cover the pillows ( got the point?) so without me knowing it, it seemed that while we were sleeping, my husband woke up because there was something flying inside and making some noise! You are right! my best friend ipis again! he then chased the cockroach all over the room and made sure that he kills it before i wake up and start killing the hotel people for having the cleanest room in the whole world! he only showed me the dead ipis when i was already, literally almost out of the room! ( that's when i decided that this is THE MAN for me!)

so you see i always feel that if there is one thing that is gonna give me a heart attack or make me want to pass out, it's not those snakes, rats or dangerous stuff, but it's the despicable and really gross cockroaches.

i remember on my first trip to munich to visit THE MAN, the first thing i asked him was "DO YOU HAVE COCKROACHES IN GERMANY?" and he said none, never and germany is such a clean country that cockroaches are unheard of.

the next day, after unpacking all my stuff, i decided to make some breakfast and went to the kitchen. after tinkering with some of the apparatus there, i saw something moving and lo and behold again! it's the IPIS! i screamed and screamed and called THE MAN . THE MAN took his slippers and started hitting and running after the creature! finally he smacked and killed it!( with me on the other room and asking every 1 minute is it dead yet? is it dead yet? )

THE MAN: you can come out now! it's dead!
ME: oH MY GGAAWD! i can not believe this! even in germany this shit is following me!
THE MAN: you know hun that's weird it's the first time i saw a cucuracha here in my apartment!
ME: HMP! how can you say that you don't have ipis here??? hellloooo! there's the proof! liar!!( near hysterics)
THE MAN: HONEY! Calm down!i swear! we do not have cockroaches here!i dont know where that thing came from!

( after a few seconds of breathing and analyzing...)

THE MAN: AHA! I know now where that shit came from...
ME: where? where????
THE MAN: FROM YOU! FROM YOUR BAG! I NEVER SAW ONE UNTIL YOU GOT HERE!YOU'RE THE ONE WHO BROUGHT THE IPIS TO GERMANY! AHA!
ME: EERRHH from me? ( in a very small voice)
THE MAN: YES! IT CAME FROM YOUR BAG! MAYBE IT GOT THERE WHILE YOU WERE PACKING!
ME: er.. ok..SO WHAT'S FOR BREAKFAST?

so now guys see how much the ipis loves me? it even made sure that i packed "IT" when i went to germany!

stealing?

2011-02-08T05:22:00.000+00:00

so after that "uneventful" talk with the manager of the hotel, we resumed our normal activities. THE MAN went diving almost everyday, i went facebooking, snorkeling, eating, playing backgammon and etc...

one good thing about the deal that we got from the hotel was the "all inclusive" thing. meaning, we have 3 meals a day, snacks and unlimited consumption of coffee, tea,water,juice and all..

the mini bar inside our room had ample stocks of M&M's, one red and one white wine, snickers bar,twix bar, some mini liquors, juices and 2 differently flavored Pringles.

AND THEY REPLENISHED IT EVERYDAY TOO!

so what's a girl got to do with it??(well a Chinese kuripot girl for that matter too!)

i told THE MAN that he should not eat all the chocolates and pringles because it's really bad for the health and tummy...( i had an evil plan..bwa ha ha ha)

tried to drink the red wine ( para lang maconsume sayang naman) but bleh, i am really not a red wine person, so i tried the white one, and bleh again because it was not good din.

so everyday, i would "safekeep" all the unconsumed chocolates and chips and other stuff so that my fridge will get replenished..

the day before our departure, i casually asked THE MAN if i can transport some wines in my bag.. (hint..hint)

THE MAN, knowing his chinese wife very well (sometimes TOO well) , looked at me and asked in an unbelieving way..

THE MAN: HONEY! DON"T TELL ME YOU GOT ALL THE WINES FROM THE MINI BAR!(disbelief )

ME: hunnybunny... of course not HELLO!!!

THE MAN: HONEY DON'T LIE TO YOUR HUSBAND!

ME: i am not lying ! i swear i didn't get all the wines...( racing heartbeat..)

THE MAN: HON! (giving me the evil look already)

ME: ok! OK! i didn't get all the wines! ..eerrr...just a few .. ok are you happy now!( trying to do reverse psychology..)

THE MAN: HOW MANY!( i swear i thought he was gonna strangle me at this point)

ME: eerr.. maybe around... 5 bottles... see. i told you i didn't get all! (defensive..)

THE MAN: OH MY G@#$!!!?!!E!W!!###!#^* WTF!#@!$#$!@^$ aARE YOU CRAZY!???WHY ARE YOU STEALING THE WINE??

ME: ( getting annoyed and defensive and embrassed all at thesame time) HELLO! I AM NOT STEALING IT! WE PAID FOR THESE AND WE DESERVE TO HAVE IT!

THE MAN: HONEY if we CONSUME it then YES it's not stealing, but if WE DO NOT DRINK IT AND KEEP IT IN THE BAG, then that is STEALING!

ME: hun it's not! I deserve to do whatever i want to do with it!

THE MAN: we can afford to buy wines honey!please return it to the mini bar! i can't believe this!

ME: yes i know we can afford but these are FREE! imagine we do not need to buy wines anymore everytime we go to bday parties ! we can save a lot of money!!!!!!and we paid for these already!>( still very insistent)

THE MAN: HONEY! LISTEN TO YOUR HUSBAND! ( now really giving me the evil evil look)

ME: OK! FINE! will return it now! ( stomping and acting upset..)

THE MAN: THANK YOU! ( and went back to watching t.v.)

so i went to my bag and got all the 8 wine bottles i "hid" there ..( still feeling a lil peeved)

"ME: ok i returned everything already.. do you want some chocolates or anything?

" THE MAN: no more honey starting today no more junk food.. back to healthy eating

damn! so now what am i gonna do with the one big plastic bag of chips candies and chocolates that i got from the mini bar??????

p.s . in the end i gave it all to the filipino staff working there... at least my "stealing" had a good end result!

and for the record, I WAS NOT STEALING... I PAID FOR IT..SO I DESERVE TO KEEP IT!

sad....

2011-02-08T04:13:00.001+00:00

just wanna take a break from my usual kwento... retired gen. angelo reyes committed suicide ...
i am not a friend or anything but in a way, despite everything that he was accused of, as a God fearing woman, i know that what he did was not the end of his problems but only the beginning in the after life....
if he was covering for someone, protecting someone, then that someone should now feel guilty or better CONFESS!

may his soul rest in eternal peace...

And now the fun begins....

2011-02-07T13:46:00.000+00:00

so after my unfortunate "accident" involving the stairs, everything went smoothly ..THE MAN finally relaxed and started enjoying his free time and i started to get paranoid about the big bruise that was becoming uglier by the day... some people even asked me if i was ok and i just told them that my husband beat me up..har har har...it's really priceless seeing their reaction.. it's like from being curious.. to concern..to..shock..to being uncomfortable and not knowing what to say..then... to relief after i told them joke joke joke!

but of course, something as big as this ( meaning my bruises) should not go unreported and "unrewarded" right? so i went to the hotel manager in my skimpiest shorts ( to make sure he sees everything..the bruises i mean..) and in my most sweet, paawa voice..( even exaggerated the limp a little ) told him..

ME: hi i just wanna report something that happened to me....

MGR: oh yeah sure may i help you???

ME: well... i slipped and fell yesterday from your stairs ( turned my back and showed him my bum and leg)....

MGR: ( looking horrified and with one vein almost popping out) oh my god! what happened!!!

ME: ( me talking to myself.. HELLO! i just told you what happened??? bingi???(deaf?)

ME: ( in my most pathetic voice..) your stairs are sooo slippery and you know it's not gonna be the first time that something like this is gonna happen .(Pause...for more drama....) ..you know my neighbor villa even told me that she cried and cried because she couldn't get out from the water and she was just there in the water for like an hour because the wooden stairs were so slippery.(OF COURSE I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT ...SHE IS QUITE BIG.. AND EVEN IF THE STAIRS WERE NOT SLIPPERY .. SHE WOULD SURELY HAVE A HARD TIME GETTING OUT...)

MGR: (stuttering a little... ) OH OH my.. my god.. do you need anything???

ME: (talking to myself... HELL YEAH!! MAYBE A WEEK OF FREE STAY? BUT OF COURSE...I CANNOT BE TOO EPAL..) no i am really fine... just want to make sure that you do something about the stairs for your future guests...and.....

HERES WHERE THE KICKER CAME IN....

ME: ( in a very high pitched voice) YOU KNOW IF THIS HAD HAPPENED IN THE STATES, I COULD SUE YOUR HOTEL AND I COULD BE A MILLIONAIRE... BECAUSE IT'S THE HOTELS RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE SURE THAT THE GUESTS ARE SAFE AND YOUR FACILITIES AND VILLAS ARE NOT ...... AND BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH...( WITH MATCHING HAND GESTURES )

MGR: ( looking a lil bit panicky and i am sure already computing lawyers fee, damages, litigations etc.....)

ME: BUT ( rewind to the sweet girl again).. since it's my honeymoon... i don't want the hassle and i don't want to look back and remember this...(pause)this.. really unfortunate incident..and i really LOOOVE your hotel and everything....so please... just send someone to fix it ok? ( with matching pa tweetums)

MGR: of course ! of course! i will send someone now and make sure everythings fixed by today!.....( looking like he want's to run away from me already...

ME: ( HELLO WALA MAN LANG BANG PA BURGER JAN!?)ok thank you very very much.. ( standing and still waiting for the magic offer...) ahm..(stalling and trying to prolong the conversation)..really nice hotel huh!? ahm.. where are you from? ( can't think of anything more to say..)

MGR: yeah.. BLAH BLAH BLAH>>

ME: ( schucks wala talaga) oh ok then see you around...and thank you for your time!( walking away but uber slowly in case.....)

MGR: sorry again mrs. friebel... blah blah blah...

ME: (ah leche daming lamok kinakagat na ako makalayas na nga) ok see you around!

so back inside the room...

THE MAN: so what happened hun? are we gonna stay for free?????(hoping and wishing!)
ME: sorry hun i tried my best but nothing...sorry baby...
THE MAN: hmp! maybe we should sue them! blah blah blah...
ME: ( hala concern ba to sa akin or gusto lang mag stay ng libre at ako pa ang gagamitin asus!)

HONEYMOON...OUCH!

2011-02-06T17:00:00.000+00:00

for someone who "hates" the sun.. ok let's rephrase it.. for someone who " is not compatible" with the sun, it's funny how the universe conspires to expose me and in a way "force" me to live under it.. i got married in a beach, relocated to a country where the sun is its number 1 asset and now, honeymooning in a sunny island! why universe !???? why??! is this my karma??? was i a bad eskimo woman in my past life? why do i need to be punished now???? i always tell THE MAN that my perfect day would be an overcast sky with just a hint of sun on the side.. is that too much to ask? oh well.. maybe when i am 90 already i will learn to befriend Mr. Sun ( since i am wrinkled and ugly and have nothing more to lose) but for now, my umbrella is my bestfriend( and my oversized sunglasses to hide my embarassment!)

going back to the maldives, i must admit that the island, the beach and the area itself is very charming one could easily fall in love to the pristine and white sandy sand...even i got a lil bit enchanted .. ( konti lang..)

the welcome dock

me and THE MAN

the waterfront villas

the place that we stayed at is called CONSTANCE MOOFUSHI RESORT.. we were lucky to get such a good deal considering that the hotel was newly renovated and got high favorable reviews from all the research that i did prior to the trip.. thank god for THE MAN, he was able to go to this site that sells last minute travel deals and on that fateful night, with his eyes closed and with a trembling hand, booked and paid the most expensive trip he ever had( hunny i am worth it naman diba?)..and WILL ever have..( milk and diapers sooon.....)

so anyway, the service was good, the accomodation was fantastic ( i loved the room and the closet!) and each villa has its own balcony and "beach" .. so you can just go straight to the water whenever feel like it..

the simple but elegant bedroom

our own balcony and sunbathing dock

the kick ass closet

taray

so on our first day, after exploring the island and planning our activities, we went back to our villa and decided to rest... i have this "habit" of lighting a smoke whenever i'm on the beach.. don't know why but i guess it was a habit i "developed" when i used to go to boracay with my besties ( carlo and lee).. there's something about the wind, water and sand that makes me want to smoke! so anyway, cigarettes were free and i asked for one and started smoking (ala bella flores).. and i was really feeling "sosyal" and "clazz" so with my cigarette on hand, i went to the balcony and admired the water and puffed a few smoke while staring at the never ending horizon( like in those telenovelas)..and talked quite loudly " try ko nga kung malamig ang water!"( let me see if the water is cold).. so i slowly made my way to the wooden stairs and gingerly tried to put one foot to the water...then all of a sudden, before i could even puff another smoke, off i went ....straight to the water.. for short, nadulas ang beauty ko at ayun sumemplang ang aking kagandahan sa tubig!( in english for my english speaking friends, my beautiful self slipped and tumbled straight to the water!)! so imagine from "clazz" to " wet dog" look in an instant!

of course the first thing i did was yelled for THE MAN.. because..

first.. i really couldn't get out from the water

second.. i needed someone to be with me in times of humiliation and kahihiyan..

so THE MAN helped me up ( while laughing his pants off of course) and tried to assessed if i had any broken bones and whatsoever.. ( none fortunately, i just had a broken EGO!)

but then i noticed that i COULDN'T walk and i had a cut on my leg and it was getting more painful by the minute, so we decided to go to the hotel clinic and have it cleaned and checked..( there were some small wood stuck on my wound).. initially the hotel attendant wanted to call for a golf cart aka wheelchair to bring me to the clinic.. but my pride was so hurt and damaged already that whatever dignity i had left that time i wanted to salvaged it.. so we walked to the clinic.. ( next time no more salvaging the dignity, i shall swallow my pride and even drink water to make sure it stays there in my stomach!)

so in the end, i walked with a limp for the next few days and while contemplating, blaming myself and asking God "why oh why" it dawned on me that the universe really conspired to grant me my hearts innermost desire.. that is to avoid the sun and stay inside the room for as much as i can! ( i can imagine THE MAN shaking his head now and calling me the crazy horse again!)

I AAAAMMMMM BACK!

2011-02-06T13:38:00.000+00:00

Hellooooooo! helloooooo! hellloooo! can't believe i was out of circulation for quite sometime! but 2011 will be different! i will be more "masipag" in posting and blogging... the past few months were quite hectic and tiring.. but time flies and damn! 2011 na!

we need to catch up my friends ( and enemies).. friends meaning the 11 followers that i have.. ( including my dear husband!) to all my " so called friends" who haven't even read my blog... hmmmp.... i...hope....please read it na.. please ..please... and follow it para naman kumita ako ng pera later on pag maraming followers... alam niyo naman mahirap ang buhay ng isang housewife ! (tinagalog ko para di maintindihan ng asawa ko..)

well where do i start? with my honeymoon!

finally after almost one year of being married, me and "the man" ( from now on, my husband will be called THE MAN.. since i am called the boss anyway.. i am just giving him the respect that he deserves..har har har) decided to have our honeymoon in a far far away land.. well 12 hours by plane to be exact...to the MALDIVES! ( i initially wanted to go to alaska or iceland or anywhere with ice and no sun.. even proposed to my husband that i go to alaska and he to maldives so we both get what we want!) in the end, the sun won over the ice and as the dutiful and perfect wife that i am ( planting the seed.. to collect later..) off we went to the most magnificent reef ,island, whatever you want to call it...

ok packing was quite tricky ..we stayed for 12 days and 11 nights.. so that means 12 bikinis( not nice to wear a wet bikini.. and for picture purposes na din ), 12 underwear, 15 tops( in case i get sweaty and i need to change), 5 leggings( in case there are mosquitoes), 8 skirts, 8 shorts( not 12 na since i have 8 skirts anyway), 9 evening or cocktail outfits ( for night outs or parties), 2 slippers( in case i lose the other one), my sneakers , platform shoes(for the gimik) and of course my ever dependable sunblock..well.. sunblocks! SPF 30, SPF 45, SPF 50 and SPF 75! Winner!!!

in the end my bag weighed more or less the allowed baggage allowance.. so i was thinking, what if i go shopping there? where will i put it????? thank god for THE MAN! ( love u hunny!)

so off we went! ( and so help me GOD!)

the "airtaxi" that brought us to the reef!

the view from the plane..the green ones

are the actual reefs and hotels..

noticed anything? i am wearing my best sun

protection! my white jacket.( although my armpits

were sweating like hell, vanity over everything

else!)

the 170 bucks hair color!

2010-10-22T01:55:00.000+01:00

so.. here was my original hair, and then look at the one on the right.. especially the roots! had to dye it dark again!

2010-10-21T17:24:00.000+01:00

when i was living in manila, being pretty, maintaining one's beauty, creating a beauty,or even faking a beauty was quite a breeze... beauty salons are a dime a dozen, aesthetic salons are everywhere, plastic surgeons are just a phone call away.. and heck.. even "wannabe" beauty experts can be found in the most remote islands and provinces of the philippines! as long as you have the money , then everything is possible.. as my friends would always say...
"if you have the money and you are STILL ugly, then..girl! whatthehell is wrong with you?! are you blind or what???????!@#>@!?_&%" (borrowing some of my gay friends lingo)...

doesn't mean of course that if you have the money, change everything about your face... i guess, we need to use the money and make it work for us... if we have ugly pimples ...since we were kids or worse.. let's say..since birth..ok then .. if you have EXTRA money to spend to make yourself look un-hideously as you can, then do it... i am an advocate for beauty and prepping ones self no matter what, no matter what time, what day and where... life is too short to be ugly...or hideous or worse TO BE UNCARING OF YOUR LOOKS! but as i said, everything should be in moderation, i know some women who ended up looking like a freak because of having too much..too much botox,lipo,facial and etc...then they would need MORE MONEY to correct what they did..anyways...

going back to my first topic about beauty, back in manila, i always have a salon that i go to.. (i misssss you so much LOUIS KEE SALON). louis cuts,color and does wonders to my hair.. so i was kinda freaking out when i realized that i can not take louis with me in my suitcase!( a girl can dream..) and if there is one thing that i hate in this world( more than cockroaches and my worst enemies) IT'S A BAD HAIR COLOR!(by bad people...meaning ..bad hairstylists and colorists..)grrrrrrr

soooo... i asked people where i can go for a good cut and reasonably priced color in lisbon, got a lot of recommendations like toni and guy and stuff..and then someone said i should try out this salon called EDUARDO BEAUTE.. it's where all the models and socialites go..so me and my husband checked out the place and found it quite posh and the prices were not so high as i was expecting it.. the location is also in center of the city and i liked the ambiance and the staff that greeted us...

kinda forgot about the salon because i already started my school and was quite busy for a while..then..one day woke up feeling restless and hating my hair color..( it happens once a month) decided to try out the salon and went there with zeina and esther... zeina has naturally wavy hair and she needed a cut badly and esther tagged along ...so off we went and the minute we entered the salon, i kinda had some weird, mixed feelings.. wanted to cancel my appointment but instead i ignored it and honored my commitment! ( to myself atleast, i am commited to be pretty ).....so with my limited portuguese, i tried to explain to the stylist that..

1. i want to have a haircolor

2. i don't want it bright, i want it darker than my haircolor now

3. i want a mix of purple and black...

4. even showed her a sample to make sure...

i really, truly hate it when my hair turns light brown or worse when my roots are lighter than the rest of the hair...why? because if it's too light (and since i am quite fair, not in a caucasian way but in a chinese, hepatitis like way..yellowish..to be exact...) i look like someone who had jaundice (when someone turns yellow) and like my eyes ( the pupils) are the only one that is visible on the neck up...so i really really really hate it... it's one thing that makes me want to strangle someone (just the hairstylist of course)...

so off we went, she applied some color and started at the roots.. ( hmm base on my experience you never start at the roots especially if it is a retouch color... ) but hey she is the professional and i trust her ( big big mistake)...so i kept my mouth shut and tried to divert my attention and the growing panic into something else...

after like 30 minutes, she applied the rest of the color and tried to sell me some stuff...( hmmmm.. now the growing panic was growing bigger and BIGGER!) i politely said no...and asked her again that the color should be DARK AND NOT LIGHT!. she said yes yes of course... and the off she went to hell... err.. to the other studio...

we , the girls, were chatting when zeina and esther suddenly asked me if i am sure that she ( the hairstylist) understood what color i wanted.. i said of course... even showed her a foto... well ...

so finally the rinsing came and off we went to the shampoo area and i asked her again about the color ( i think she was a lil bit annoyed that time) but deep inside i already had a sick feeling in my stomach ( but still was optimistic that it was just the paranoid in me talking)..

then she asked if i wanted to have my hair dried ( uhh yeah..duhh. you don't expect me to go out with a full mop of hair outside right? and looking like a wet dog?? hellloooo!!!!!! that's why i am here! to be pretty>> not to look like a mutt!) so i said yes.. please.. dry my hair..

then came this awful looking man who never said a word to me ( he looked pissed all the time) and started blowdrying my hair ( not so gently ouch ouch couch! ) and i felt like sinasabunutan ako huh!( to my english speaking friends.. sinasabunutan is pulling the hair.. like in a cat fight!)

then he asked me ( through sign language) if i want to put some gloss in my hair....( really ... sign language.. got a bottle, acted like he was pouring it on his palm and then applied it to my hair.. ) so i said yes...ok.. then he applied 2 drops of the serum and continued blowdrying my hair ( was so scared that my hair would really fall off because of his GENTLE TOUCH)...

THEN again he asked me ( sign language) if he can spray something on my hair ( sign language through act of spraying) and i said yes yes..

VOILA!

When i looked in the mirror for the final result...with the lights and on... and everything... with zeina and esther trying to have the "no reaction" face

i looked and my hair was..

FLAMING RED!

RED RED RED! AND THE WORST PART? RED FROM FROM THE ROOTS UP TO THE MID PART OF THE HAIR! (ok i told myself.. barbi.. breathe deeply, don't panic.. might be the light in the salon... breathe..breathe..and try not to get the scissor in the table...try not to kill someone on your first month here in portugal ok.. )

so of course everybody in the salon was praising THE WORK OF ART( i felt like a work of art.. truly.. like an abstract painting..ddduuuhhh!) ...( i think they have a recorder already.. after a job is done, they press PLAY and all the BULLSHIT comes out...)

and then came the most UNFORGETTABLE MOMENT....

THE BILL... ( dun dun dun dun dun.. like the music in a horror movie)
here was the summary of my bill...( all in euros.. so please do the conversion in pesos after)

1. color- 702.

2.washing- 20 ( didn't know that washing is not part of the color.. i wonder if i HAD DECIDED not to wash it, how would they take out the color? hay hay hay)

3. blowdrying- 40 ( i paid this much to have my hair tortured and almost killed)

4. serum 2 drops - 20 ( damn! should have eaten the serum instead! then maybe it will be more effective!)

5. spray- 20( good lord! maybe i should have asked him to spray it directly inside my nose to get the full effect!)

total: 170 fuckingeuros!

ok.. that time i was using my husbands credit card.. so my brain was already frozen with fear and was already trying to come up with excuses..( to my husband) and already concocted a "damage control" plan too..in case he really really gets pissed.. ( if that was my credit card and my husband used it and charged that amount.. i think we will be divorced by now..)( i love u hunny.. it was a joke!)

so i paid and got the hell out of the salon as fast as we can.. when we got out to the street, with full sunshine and light and more, esther told me that my hair was really red red red!( sorry had to repeat it so many times because just wanted to emphasize how red it really was...)

so .. while driving, i was imagining and expecting the worst from my husband when i finally tell him what happened.. so my damage control was..
1. tell him that i will be his SLAVE FOR A WEEK...

2. do everything he wants me to to.. ( all positions imaginable and stuff..)

3. clean the house more ( like really CLEAN CLEAN, Not just one clean.. )
and if all fails..

4 gently remind him that marriage is really like this... the husband has to forgive the wife when she overspends.. and..

5. remind him again about his promise to take care of me... ( emotional blackmail)

so i got home and the moment of truth arrived...my husband came in, asked me how my day was before he can even say another word, i went on and told him how I WAS ROBBED AND TORTURED AND FOOLED in the salon.. ( i was trying to have tears in my eyes but damn,, sometimes the tear ducts are so damn stubborn!) and that i hated my hair color and i am so miserable about it and i will never ever ever ever go back to that salon again ( and never ever ever ever TRY to spend that much again...)

" but your hair looks nice hunny, i love the color..." the husband said...

"are you serious????? you must be kidding me..

""yeah i really like it... it suits you...

" hmm i was kinda feeling a lil bit better already then i realize something.....

MY HUSBAND IS COLOR BLIND

so need i say more????????????

p.s. thank god for loreal and garnier home color.. only spent 8 euros to re-color my hair...

driving...the portuguese way...

2010-10-18T20:46:00.000+01:00

when i arrived here my husband warned me that portuguese drivers are the craziest in the world ( uhm.. hunny.... i came from the philippines...uhm..i think WE are the craziest in the world but ok.. don't want to shatter his image of me as a sweet and fragile ,gentle filipina woman.. NOT... ...)so he gave me SOME sort of a lecture on how things work here...like..

1."... red light means STOP..." - ok fine, but back in my country red light means GO GO GO! have to re calibrate my brain and make sure when i see red... i stop...AND hit the brakes..and not hit the gas pedal as if my life depends on it...

2. "...there are 3 lanes on the freeway.. innermost left is for the fastest car...middle is for...blah blah..."-.zzzzzzzz sorry i kinda spaced out while he was explaining it to me... whatever free space i see, i take.. seems easier and practical...

3.".... when you reach the roundabout, whoever is coming in should give way and the one in the roundabout has the priority and if you are faced with 5 different streets while doing the roundabout and you cannot decide what road to take just stay there and make the circle over and over.....and over.. ".. - yyyyaaawwwnnn...huh? what roundabout? sorry stay in the circle? what ? until i puke? i'm telling you this roundabout thing is the most ?!#$>"*%! i've seen ..

4. " when you see those white stripes on the floor that looks like giraffe marks.. that means it's pedestrian lane and they have the right of way all the time...."- pedestrian way? didn't even know it exists!or that they have the right of way.. ok fine.. whatever... sure thing...

i am able to drive here because of my international drivers license that i got in manila... i also have my filipino license and we were lucky that i was allowed to exchange it for a portuguese one.. i heard that to get a license here is quite difficult.. you have to take a driving course, pass the theoretical exam( i was told that even portuguese sometimes fail it because it was so hard and the questions are so tricky)and then take the practical test... this would normally take months...and still no guarantee that you will have your license...

well in the philippines this was how i got my license...

1. went to the land and transportation office

2 paid double the amount than the normal price

3. was given the answer for the exam questions

4. was INSTRUCTED not to answer all the questions in the paper and just answer the first 10...(so they can fill out the rest in case i am THAT stupid that i do not remember the answers that they gave me...)

5. took the exam and answered ALL ( just to prove to them that i am not STUPID)

6. waited for 10 minutes

7. was asked if i want to add MOTORCYCLE in my license aside from car ( additional fee of course)

8. paid additional money so i don't do the practical test anymore

9. waited for another 10 minutes

10. had my picture taken and then..

11. voila.! have my license already...

see as i said... i AM VERY LUCKY that i do not have to do all the right and legal things here in portugal.... or else.. God have mercy on me!

driving in portugal is quite tricky... imagine driving in a maze... there are bus lanes, car lanes, tram lanes, one way lanes, no entry lanes, dead end lanes, delivery lanes, and so on and so forth...not to mention the streets... the streets are so small and narrow and goes up and down...

i remember the very first time i braved the streets of lisbon ...

i met up with my friend esther after class and we decided to have lunch somewhere ..so we decided to take the car and just navigate through the busy streets of lisbon until we find the place that we were looking for..( i was kinda nervous i must say because i saw how my husband nearly.. always have a heart attack when he drives in lisbon..) but i told myself hey what could go wrong right? will just follow all the cars and make sure i don't get to the tram and bus lanes...

so off we went and i really followed the car in front of me... sort of stalked it.. to make sure that i am on the right way..or lane...

so everything was cool and we were chatting and stuff ..(but i had my eyes on the car in front of me...).. when all of a sudden .. the car disappeared! i swear to god... it really literally vanished in front of my eyes.. and me and esther and the car were left alone in a lane THAT we later found out was the BUS LANE AND TRAM LANE! ( here in portugal, if u drive in those lanes, people really panic and tell you to leave ..and you really get a ticket!)we were kinda panicking and like normal girls..OVERPANICKING! it was an understatement.....and then all of a sudden.. a police magically appeared ( i swear to god... that day was full of magic... cars disappearing and police appearing.. out of nowhere...) and what made me PANIC MORE was when the police made this horrified look on his face!( like his face was all twitchy and squirmy and i was thinking that time that he was more of in panic than me!) with both his arms flailing and gesturing and fortheloveofgod i don't know what else he was doing,. we luckily found a street that we could turn to and leave that godforsakenlane! but of course at the back of my head i was already thinking of excuses if i get arrested or a ticket..like...

1. i would say " no talk ingris or poltugis. foleyner me: no talk english or portuguese.. foreigner me..: like how a mainland chinese would say it....

or...

2.. lower my low cut blouse more than what is legally allowed( sorry hunny desperate times calls for desperate measures), cry my eyes out, and tell the police that i just arrived and i feel so lost and lonely and homesick and i want to go home already and give the most heartbreaking performance of my life..(bravo! bravo!).then ..make my eyes more round and pitiful(like a puppy) and say sorry sorry sorry and please forgive me...next time i know already... etc..etc....

luckily...

i didn't use neither of the two because the police just let us go .maybe because he saw two scared looking women in the car on the verge of panic and with veins almost popping out of their heads!

lucky me... whew!

i don't want to say all the stuff that i did while driving because i don't want my poor husband to have a heart attack... but hey.. i am a filipino and we are known for breaking almost all the rules and not get caught ..and...if we ever get caught.. use our charms and try to get away with it...and besides, as i always tell people who questions my driving capabilities, i am still alive and kicking... no scratch.. no nothing... so i must be doing something right...

and let's just put it this way... you can not teach old dogs new tricks...

i rest my case...

HELLO PORTUGAL!

2010-10-09T11:17:00.000+01:00

OK... so now i am finally here... in Portugal... well...how do i feel about it? don't know yet ...too early to tell but i must say that Portugal is quite different from all the other european countries i've been to...

i had shipped almost 10 boxes to Portugal and i unpacked all in 2 days... guess that's what happens when you have all the time in your hands...

let me tell you first where we live...

our area is called ESTORIL ( ESH-TO-RIL)(that's how they pronounce it!!).. 30 minutes away from Lisbon and is on the side of the atlantic ocean... well actually our house is just 10 minutes(by foot) from the Atlantic Ocean...so quite convenient ...unfortunately i do not like the beach and the sun so ...( i am from the philippines where the sun shines almost 360 times a year and where the beaches are dime a dozen.. so u know where i am coming from..)but my MAN loves it and that's all that matters... for now...:)

so of course, as a girl and being a girl, the first thing i asked my husband when i arrived here was... " WHERE'S THE SHOPPING CENTER AND GROCERY???".. good thing, being the PERFECT MAN that he is ( for me ..) he sweetly told me where it was and how to get there:) ok.. so... now the next question is..." DO THEY SPEAK ENGLISH OR ETC.. ETC..."..the answer made me tear up and made me want to pack all my stuff again in those boxes and fly back to manila... unfortunately, everything is written in Portuguese and not a lot of people here are well how do i put it... well versed in English?so i kinda told myself.." shit barbara patay kang bata ka!" (shit barbara, you are so deeeaaaadddd!)

my first 2 weeks in Portugal were not as bad..(when i say not as bad it means i only thought of going back home 3 times in 2 weeks).. first thing i did was searched for a portuguese school for foreigners and try to integrate and assimilate myself as fast as i can ( i always want things done fast.. if i can learn the language in 1 day i would do it! )(btw.. patience is OBVIOUSLY not my virtue)...

so i googled and googled and googled and finally found 2 schools that were quite ok and interesting... in the end i chose Cambridge School because..

1. the location is perfect.. it is in lisbon and in the center of the city

2. i like that they offer tea and coffee and snacks before class... everyday...

3. i like the director of the school.. Senhor Pedro.. reminds me of Mr. Grinch with a mix of Santa Claus

4. and they guarantee that i will speak the language after one course( the basics of course...)

so back at the homefront...

one thing i realized when i moved here was how spoiled my life was in manila... i had a driver, a maid, everything was done for me.. when i wake up , there was breakfast .. i wanna go somewhere, i have someone who will drive me there.. when i bought something , someone carries it for me...for 36 years, i never learned how to cook, wash the dishes, clean the house or even wash clothes... because someone is always doing it for me...

fast forward to present life...NOW.. i have to do the dishes, i have to clean the house, do the laundry, drive myself everywhere, carry everything, and worse of them all,, i have to COOK!!!!!

MEU DEUS! what have i gotten myself into>???? from a super career and independent woman to a domesticated diva?or maybe goddess?? :) never realized too that housework takes so much time... destroyed some of my husbands clothes ( well let's say i recycled it... before it was his jacket, now it's mine because it shrunk.. who would have thought that one needs to set the washing machine to a certain heat and blah blah... i just put everything and turned it on! it' s suppose to make our lives easier right, and not suppose to make us think!) so anyway .. yes...

my good husband nearly, always, was on the verge of having a heart attack everytime i wash the clothes.. well... i wanted to learn how to do it properly but everything in the machine too was written in portuguese... so i just used my instinct and prayed to God that this time i get it right! :)

goodbye philippines...hello PORTUGAL!

2010-10-08T20:13:00.000+01:00

SOOOOO... finally my dream of leaving manila and living in a new country finally arrived!...for those of you who don't know me yet.. well here is a short background about me..

1.. my name is barbi chan... friebel... yes.. now with friebel because i just got married to this wonderful friebel creature...

2.. i am a make up artist by profession... ( real make up artist not " beautician" or " manicurista" although i have nothing against them but i just want to stress the difference).

3..WAS the Chief make up artist of Maybelline New york in the Philippines up until may this year (2010)..

......but now back to being a struggling make up artist again ( hay buhay... )

4.. had a very fruitful ,exciting, fun, erratic,sometimes erotic, sad, happy,turbulent,out of this world life for the last 7 years...

5.. was happy being single and mingling with my "gay" besties..when...

6.. kappoom! met THE ONE.. THE ONE that made me realize and feel that I Barbara Jones Labares Ang..in short Barbi chan... (screen name duh) ...is still a certified...(drum rolls please)...GIRL! ( thought that i became one of the gaygirls :)

7.. so fast forward... proposal, engagement,preparation,work,preparation,work and then finally THE WEDDING....

8.. after all the stress,heartaches,frustrations and etc...

9.. after finishing off everything in manila ( sob sob)...

10..packing almost everything..(more sobs)

11.. and telling myself over and over and over and over again that my life will be better than it was...

12.. taadaaa! i am now here in PORTUGAL!!!!!!!@!!!!!!!woohoooo!!!or wait...huhuhuhuhuhuhu????don't know ...wait lang...i am a lil bit confuse...

(TO BE CONTINUED)