Benjamin Ministries Blog

We Were Meant To Have Joy

Benjamin Ministries — Sun, 13 May 2012 13:58:43 +0000

Happy Mother's Day to all the Mom's who are reading this today!

No matter what your situation is today, I hope you will choose to see the joy that is before you. Though there is sorrow and sadness in the world, God intended for His children to experience joy. Having lost a son to an ugly death and cast into a time where sorrow overwhelmed me, I know what it is like to have to fight to see joy. I was so depressed and distraught in my soul at one time, that I remember crying out to God and telling Him it's not supposed to be this way. I am not supposed to feel so sad and hopeless!

In His still small voice He said, "Than open your eyes to the Joy that is before you. It is here, just train your eyes and your heart to see it."

I was stunned, because in that very moment I had my family right before me and they were just waiting for the next happy memory to be made. They didn't care where it would be made or even how, they were just ready for the next part of their day to happen. What that meant, is that I had the power within me to make a difference in their lives and to play a part in their ability to experience joy.

At that moment I made a conscience decision to open my eyes wider, each and every day. On the days I was feeling downcast, I would ask myself, "What can I celebrate? What can I rejoice in"

I was able to take the fiery dart of the enemy and turn it into a moment of praise and a momentum to change that hour, day, week...from sorrow to joy.

If you’re are missing your Mom today, or you are a Mom missing a child, please have a conversation with your heavenly Father and tell Him about your broken heart. Then, ask Him to open your eyes to the joy that is right in front of you. Ask Him what you can do to create a memory of joy for you and those special people that are in your life this very moment. Choose to be happy...not sad.

I promise you, you will not regret it!

“These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full."

John 15:11

Selah:)

It's No Different Than Any Holiday or Special Day

Benjamin Ministries — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 03:54:43 +0000

Well you may have seen the post I made earlier about today being a day we call Ben's Day. This is the day we remember Ben going home to heaven and it is no different to us than any other holiday, or special day. No matter what week day it is, we make sure we take the day off from work, school etc . and make it a very special family day.

We usually try to take a day trip and explore a new place we have never been to or gone before. Sometimes, however, because of varying schedules we may end up at a park somewhere in the area to hike a trail or throw a frisbee. Even a trip to a unique shop or business such as the Wizard of Clay in Honeyoye, NY, or some other type of interesting museum or landmark can be a nice escape.

We always include a trip to the cemetery at some time in the day, where we place baby blue carnations at Ben's grave. These were the very same flowers my Mom had waiting for Ben and I upon our arrival home after Ben was born. Each flower is a token of love, remembrance and hope that we will one day see Ben again when we are called home to heaven, just as the Bible promises.

We look forward to a special family dinner together as well, on Ben's day. Whether local or out of town the meal we share together is just as enjoyable as any other dinner planned for a special family day.

Another tradition we have built into Ben's day is to purchase some kind of remembrance token that we place on a shelf at home we call Ben's shelf. It is always a joy to look back over the unique items we have collected over the years as we have taken the time out to remember Ben in this special way.

If you have lost a child, or someone who has been very special to you and your family, you may want to consider this idea or something similar to it. Though Ben's life ended from a horrific tragedy, this time we spend together as a family embracing the traditions we have created over the years, has taken this tragedy and turned it into a very special day we look forward to enjoying together.

If we didn’t have this wonderful tradition to look forward to on this day, we would probably find ourselves trapped in the darkness of it and would most likely dread it’s arrival and hasten its departure. That’s the true beauty of Ben’s day. It takes the bitterness of what would have been a downcast day and turns it, instead, into sweet memory.

These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full. John 15:11

Selah

I'm Awake and Ready to Roll!

Benjamin Ministries — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 16:31:11 +0000

Well, I am now communicating this officially through this Ben Min blog, that I am now finally awake, after being in a stupor for 9 days of post op from a tonsillectomy. Yes, you heard that right. At the age of 49 I was chosen to have my tonsils removed . I can speak from experience and confirm any talk you may have heard about this surgery causing a bit more difficulty when you are older. Of course it's not the surgery that is more difficult, quite frankly, I never even saw the OR...

Anesthesiologist: (in hallway outside of the OR) "I'm going to give you a little something to relax you now."

Me:" OK"

3 hours later

Nurse: "Mrs. Waterman it's time to wake up.

Dan: "Hello sleepy-head, are you going to finally join us?"

Me: "I have a lot of guck in the back of my throat...

And so it went from there.

It's the bounce back after the surgery that poses to be the "more difficult" part of this particular surgery and in many cases just about any surgery. The fact is, the older we are the harder our bodies have to fight to bring us back to a "normal” or perhaps, "new normal" state.

Well today is day 10, I am feeling like the pain is finally starting to cease, and I am actually awake enough to remember how to use my laptop again. Sedatives are very useful for days containing outlandish pain, and though we seem to be awake in the day hours while on those kind of medications, the hard reality is we really are not awake. Please feel free to LOL with me me if you can relate to this in any way.

I am so thankful that with all of the many things that could have gone "wrong" meaning a direction that would have sucked the life out of me all the more, that they did not. Though I was depressed and discouraged for many moments (hours) during these last nine days, the presence of God was with me.

When I needed Him to carry me He did. When I needed His comfort He gave it to me. When I needed to know how to deal with my recovery strategy in a more effective manner, He gave me wisdom. When I need to cry, He wiped my tears. When I needed to call out to Him with discouragement and ask for His help, He gave me that still small voice to listen to. When I needed a hug, He sent me one through my hubby or my kids or a lovong friend who came by for a visit.

Even in the midst of a sedative stupor, God was with me and assured me that I had the strength, not of my own, but in Him, to carry me through this not so welcoming surgery.

Today, I am feeling restored and ready to pick up my armor and continue on in the fight for the great commission Christ has called all His believers to join in...“Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature." Mark 16:15

This life is full of mountains and valleys. We will have moments we couldn't imagine being any happier; and then we will have moments when we wish it could just all come to an end. Please remember that no matter what state you are in, God is right there. He is ready and waiting to meet your need. He doesn't want you to feel alone or abandoned. He just wants you to ask Him for help. He never disappoints and when we really tune in to His still small voice, He is ready to come to our rescue.

Cry out to Him! Let Him here your voice. Believe in His Word and all of the many promises He has made to us. When you do, you will be amazed at how you will feel His arms around you...because they are!

Guard my soul and deliver me; Do not let me be ashamed, for I take refuge in You. Psalm 25:20

Selah

He cares for you even more than the creatures He has created!

Worth More than Silver or Gold

Benjamin Ministries — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 15:51:58 +0000

The ladies in our In the Light bereavement support group caught me at church yesterday to have prayer with me before my tonsillectomy tomorrow. It brought me to tears. These are treasures worth more than silver or gold. I am so thankful to know God intimately, that He knows me more intimately than I know myself, That all my days are ordained and to be able to share His love with others...priceless!!!

Psalm 139:16

"Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them."

Thank you again ladies, you're ARK Act of Random Kindness meant more to me than words can ever express!

In the Light will still meet this week, on Thursday the 19, at 7 PM at the church. I won't be there, but my dear friend Kathy will be.If you are grieving any loss (whether by death or other - divorce, separation) please join us. You are sure to be encouraged, comforted and lifted to a higher place by studying God's word in depth! His Word is the solid rock we can stand on when the storms of life come raging in. Prayer can truly lift us to higher place where we can have the eyes to see things in a spiritual dimension that is beyond human comprehension. Now who wouldn't want to be working towards that, especially if you are grieving a loss?

Today my mind is dwelling on these very precious and amazing verses God brought to me shortly after we said, "Farewell for now," to our dear son, Ben...whom we will see again one day in heaven!

Psalm 96:17, 18, 22

(17) "If the LORD had not been my help, My soul would soon have dwelt in the abode of silence. 18 If I should say, “My foot has slipped,” Your loving kindness, O LORD, will hold me up. 19 When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.

(22) But the LORD has been my stronghold, And my God the rock of my refuge."

Yeah, when you are facing the unknowns of a surgery, you thoughts can certainly become anxious. How do you fight that? Dwell on God's promises all the more:)

Isaiah 26:3

“The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, Because he trusts in You."

Selah

He Sits at the Throne and Yet We Can Call Him Friend!

Benjamin Ministries — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 14:20:19 +0000

It's pretty sraight forward, and when you ponder it, it is mind boggling...

“looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:2

" No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you." John 15:15

Yeah, He sits on the throne, and if we invite Him into our life, He calls us friend.

So happy to be a friend to Jesus! Please let Him be yours too.

I Don't Want to Drown!

Benjamin Ministries — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 00:52:47 +0000

When I take my eyes off Jesus, is when I feel like I'm drowning. The solution is simple...don't take my eyes of Jesus! I will strive to see life through His eyes... in every moment. Saying it is one thing, living it is another, but the more I think it, the easier it will get!

"Turn your eyes upon Jesus

Look full in His wonderfuk face,

And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,

In the light of His Glory and Grace."

It's Never Too Late!

Benjamin Ministries — Wed, 28 Mar 2012 14:30:44 +0000

It's never too late to give a personalized memoriam plaque to the one you know who is bereaving a loss. Please learn more about these free gift packages at benjaminministries.org

Whether they have recently experienced loss or the loss occured many years ago, they will be thrilled you were thinking of them, and the plaque they will receive will become a life long treasure! You can even order a package for yourself. It is our desire to help those who are bereaving to find happier days during the stormy time of loss.

Don't Take Your Eyes Off Him!

Benjamin Ministries — Mon, 26 Mar 2012 15:49:18 +0000

Hey to all our Ben Min friends. I hope today will be one in which you will set your eyes on Jesus all day long and feel his presence throughout your day! When we take our eyes off Him is when worry doubt, fear, sorrow and sadness creep in!

Please pray for Benjamin Ministries today, and through this week. I KNOW we will be seeing God do His amazing work in this ministry and it will be because of 128 friends bringing their prayers before our Great and Mighty God and His throne.

"The LORD has established His throne in heaven, And His kingdom rules over all." Psalm 103:19

We are dreaming BIG for Ben Min and are ready to see God answer in even BIGGER ways! He wants to bring us to Higher Ground. Look carefully at the words of this great Hymn:

I’m pressing on the upward way,New heights I’m gaining every day;

Still praying as I’m onward bound, “Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.”

Refrain: Lord, lift me up and let me stand,

By faith, on Heaven’s tableland,

A higher plane than I have found;

Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.

My heart has no desire to stay

Where doubts arise and fears dismay;

Though some may dwell where those abound,

My prayer, my aim, is higher ground.

I want to live above the world,

Though Satan’s darts at me are hurled;

For faith has caught the joyful sound,

The song of saints on higher ground.

I want to scale the utmost height

And catch a gleam of glory bright;

But still I’ll pray till heav’n I’ve found,

“Lord, plant my feet on higher ground.”

These were the words God gave me the day of our first bereavement conference. I had not been able to sleep even for just one minute the night before the conference and had to fight a sense of panic. Did God really want me to bare my soul for the first time in a public forum without any sleep the night before? The answer was, "Yes." He wanted to take me to a place I had never been before. A place where I had to completely trust in what my life verse had been for so many years..." I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." He wanted me to see that, "Yeah, I can do ALL things through Christ...it's for real!!! He wanted to take me to a higher ground.

He wants this for you too. Will you let go and trust Him today with whatever you are struggling with? Will you cast all of your anxious thoughts aside and let His truth and His love fill your soul instead?

I am ready for Higher Ground...How About You?

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6

Selah:)

If you take the time to pray for Ben Min would you encourage us by letting us know. Thx!

Ready to Scale the Utmost Heights!

One Act of Random Kindness...ARK

Benjamin Ministries — Tue, 20 Mar 2012 18:13:59 +0000

I will admit this is not my idea. It's taken from the movie "Evan Almighty" with Steve Carell. It is such a great concept and since watching that movie (more than once of course) I have never forgotten it.

If we would strive each day to live our lives looking for ARK opportunities, I think we could change the world. It really means we take our eyes off of us and we put them on others. That translates into- SLOW DOWN!

One of the reasons we miss out on ARK opportunities is that we are in such a rush we just don't have time for an ARK event.

Well, here's a thought...plan an ARK opportunity. Don't just wait for it to happen, but actually plan an Act of Random Kindness you can do for someone in your circle of friends, family or acquaintances.

You might find that this is just as fun as planning a birthday party or fun night out.

Bringing a smile and some joy to someone's life is after all...priceless!

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. John 13:34

Selah

He Would Have Been 15 Today!

Benjamin Ministries — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 23:05:28 +0000

Well, our Ben would have been 15 today. For the past few years I have usually cruised through this day pretty good. It is not uncommon that I would shed a tear or more just thinking about how much we miss him and what it would be like if he were here with us still. My mind then takes me to heaven and I just try to imagine what he is doing in that realm. We gather with the family for a special meal and share good conversation and even some special laughs; and then the day is over and we are on to the next. Today was a different kind of day though...Much different than the past few years have been.

When I awoke this morning I felt the need to just stay in a bed a little longer, and then decided I would spend some time in prayer (not a good place to pray, but sometimes it is successful). The next thing I knew this young man was standing in front of me, and he threw his arms around me and said,

"Hi Mom."

The embrace was one of the most spectacular moments I have ever had in my life. The joy I felt in the moment was indescribable. And though it lasted for just a few moments in time, it felt, oh, so much longer than that. And then I woke up.

I laid there paralyzed and in shock when I realized it was my Ben who had hugged me. It was a dream, I know, but it really felt more like a glimpse into heaven, and I think that is where I am going to leave it. It is a dream (memory) that I know I will have for the rest of my life. I felt his presence, I heard his voice, I saw his face and I felt his warm embrace. Even if it was in a dream, it was real enough to carry it with me forever. For this I say...thank you Jesus:)

Happy Birthday Ben!; We miss you and love you so!

“Dear Jesus, give him a kiss and a hug for us, tell him we love him and can’t wait to see him again”

" For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us." Romans 8:18 (The Benjamin Ministries ministry verse.)

A Package designed for you to give to a family member or friend who is bereaving the loss of a loved one. Just visit www.benjaminministries.org for more information.