Beth Comics

Leah Wins

2013-05-18T12:14:00.001-05:00

Basically, any comment that points out the downside of a project makes me less likely to try. Leah always goes straight to the "Yes, do it" option, often throwing in her own ideas or imaginings. That's the kind of feedback that makes me feel like I can do anything I put my hand to. Thing is, I know I can do anything learnable, but only if I have enough motivation. Motivation is often my sole limiting factor, and anyone who dampens my enthusiasm with "reality" can that easily stop me from doing anything at all.

So here's to encouragement!

Panel 1
[People I Don't Want to Hang Out With]
Beth: I want to make this cute princess dress! Maybe in time for the RennFaire!
Person: That would be a LOT of work.

Panel 2
[Leah]
Beth: I want to make this cute princess dress! Maybe in time for the RennFaire!
Leah: You should do that!

Someone

2013-05-17T13:57:00.001-05:00

Panel 1
Beth: Someone doesn't want me to be comfortable, and that someone is in my uterus.

TV Cat

2013-02-28T00:00:00.000-06:00

Tiger stopped in front of the TV on his way from the couch, propped his front paws high on it, and stretched. It looked like he was trying to hug one of the characters on my show. Also, when I try to watch it in spite of him sometimes I think "Why's there a cat in this scene?" Very disconcerting.

"Obviously there should be a cat in every scene ever." -Alex

Panel 1
n/a

Panel 2
Beth: I didn't know there was a cat in this.
Alex: That's Tiger. He's outside the TV.
Beth: Oh.

Panel 3
n/a

Kitty Scooch

2013-02-20T07:00:00.000-06:00

Tiger wanted Kaylee's couch spot, so he took it. She grumbled but scooted.

Love

2013-02-13T02:00:00.000-06:00

When Tiger wants in a room, he opens the door by throwing himself at the handle until he manages to unlatch it while simultaneously pushing with his considerable body weight. It is very VERY loud and takes 1 to 4 tries.

Then he does his lowercase purring and you forgive him. All he wanted was to sleep on the bed with you, after all.

Panel 1
KER-BANG!

Panel 2
CREEEAK!

Panel 3
n/a

Panel 4
purr purr purr purr

Whiners

2013-02-08T08:07:00.000-06:00

During my last pregnancy, I had a cold. And Tanner and I really enjoy whining at each other. (That was going to be past tense, but I think we could be prevailed upon to find a reason even now he's moved out.) And, in reality, Tanner told Alex he didn't need to get it for him. But Alex did. B/c that's who he is.

Panel 1
Tanner: [WHINE] Beth, the Playstation controller is way over there. Get it for me?
Beth: [WHINE] I'm sick and pregnant. [WHINE]

Panel 2
Tanner: [WHINE] But I'm lazy.
Beth: [WHINE] I'm lazier.
Tanner: [WHINE] I could strongly contest that.
Beth: [WHINE]

Panel 3
Alex: Here.
Tanner: Oh, hey. Thanks.
Beth: [COUGH COUGH]

The Christmas Test

2013-02-02T17:00:00.000-06:00

This comic is from two Christmases ago. Jon and Leah were in on it, which is why Jon jumped to stop my mother from touching the stick. (I have this on video. It's great.) The pregnancy referenced here ended in a miscarriage in my first trimester, so I decided to wait to post this until I got pregnant again. And here we are! Currently expecting.

A few statistics: 30% of first pregnancies end in miscarriage. That drops to 10% on your second pregnancy, and the chance for miscarriage drops every day you're pregnant without miscarriage. Once you hit your second trimester, miscarriage is very unlikely.

I also want to point out that PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome) increases the chances of miscarriage. While I don't have PCOS, several women very close to me do. One of the most obvious signs of PCOS is an irregular period (does it take forever for your period to show up?), but other symptoms are obesity, acne, irregular hair growth or hair loss, and difficulty getting and staying pregnant. If you think you might have PCOS, please see a doctor. (Also, I have it on good authority that the online PCOS community is incredibly supportive, so don't be afraid to reach out.)

Panel 1
Mom: Christmas present from Beth & Alex! Yay!

Panel 2
Mom: Kitchen tool?
Dad: Oh!

Panel 3
Dad: Are you?
Mom: Huh.
Beth: [NOD] Hee hee!

Panel 4
Mom: [REACH]

Panel 5
Jon: NO! DON'T! STOP! Mom!

Panel 6
Mom: OH! It's a pregnancy test!
Dad: [HAPPY!] Babies!
Beth: Mom...

Panel 7
Mom: HUG!
Beth: How about AFTER you wash your hands?

How to Keep the Peace

2013-01-28T14:25:00.000-06:00

True story. Z likes to pick on Tanner, so one evening I just went where my sleepy brain told me: kneading at Z while crowding him and meowing. This is now my go-to crowd control method for him.

Near Miss

2013-01-22T06:41:00.000-06:00

My imagination is thorough.

Panel 1
Alex: Jon and I almost got in a wreck today. Some guy went right through a red light. Don't think he noticed it.

Panel 2
Alex: Good night, sweetie.
Beth: SNIFFLE. I was just at the trial for your manslaughter.
Alex: I shouldn't have said anything.

Panel 3
Beth: I was in the middle of deciding my hairstyle. A classy low bun, but I look better with a little down around my face.
Alex: SIGH

Leah Meets Dream Alex

2013-01-16T06:36:00.000-06:00

Previous Dream Alex reference here. Upon the recitation of this tale, Alex laughed so hard he couldn't breathe. Specifically, at the mention of small valuables going missing.

Panel 1
Leah: I met Dream Alex.
Beth: Do tell.

Panel 2
Leah: You were REALLY pregnant.
Beth: Okay.

Panel 3
Leah: And you'd kind of turned naive hickish. And Alex was there. First time.
Beth: Alrighty.

Panel 4
Leah: My dream Alex is apparently kind of slimy-charming...
Beth: Uh huh.

Panel 5
Leah: ...and when he left, I realized all of my small valuables were missing.

Panel 6
Beth: That's awesome.

Sweet Tiger

2013-01-03T12:34:00.000-06:00

True story. My brain even creeps me out sometimes.

Panel 1
Beth: Tiger, you're so sweet. ... But not in a food way. ... Actually, probably in a food way. ... Not that I plan to find out.

Panel 2
Beth: I LOVE YOU, TIGER! NO THINKING ABOUT EATING KITTIES EVER!

The Slide

2012-12-23T06:23:00.000-06:00

It was Aaron's little red PlaySkool slide. I think they were just getting it out of the way temporarily, but it's really weird to have a slide right beside the toilet.

Panel 1
Beth: Why is there a SLIDE in your bathroom?
Jon: We had to put it SOMEWHERE.

Panel 2
Aaron: WHEEE!

The Port Nacelles

2012-12-17T07:08:00.000-06:00

[Captain Kathryn Janeway | Chief Engineer B'Elanna Torres]

It is ALWAYS the nacelles.

Panel 1
KER-KRUNCH!
Janeway: B'Elanna, please tell me that wasn't the port--
B'Elanna: --nacelles? Sorry, Captain. It was.

Panel 2
Janeway: What was it THIS time? A spec of space dust hit us too hard?

Panel 3
B'Elanna: Whoever decided that nacelles should be made out of toothpicks should be court-martialed.
Janeway: Agreed.

POISON

2012-12-12T07:07:00.000-06:00

Panel 1
Beth: When posting recipes to a communal recipe site, it is probably best that your user name not be "POISON."

Panel 2
Beth: Srsly. POISON.

Ultrasound

2012-12-08T06:25:00.000-06:00

When Leah was pregnant with Aaron, I told her the ultrasound looked like a slug. I learned much later that she'd gone home and cried. Poor Leah!

Panel 1
Leah: Look at my ultrasound!
Beth: It looks like a slug.

Panel 2
Leah: Is baby, not slug. *sniffle sniff sniffle*

Guess

2012-12-03T16:17:00.000-06:00

I find it soothing to shower to candlelight, and I love being able to poke my head out of the curtain and see Tiger! Plus, clean undies. I tend to just throw my jammies back on, but only monsters don't put on clean undies.

Anyway, I had all three things in my arms while talking to the guys before my shower and realized it probably looked a little... strange.

Panel 1
What is Beth up to? Can you tell? Tiger, Matches, Clean Undies

CrimCrim

2012-11-29T06:57:00.000-06:00

I love "Criminal Minds." Reid and Garcia are my favorite characters.

I did say the above, though it was half to troll the guys. The other half really wanted to see if Reid had grown out his hair.

Panel 1
Alex: Surprise! We got the season opener of Criminal Minds!
Tanner: I do accept thanks in the form of cash.
Beth: GASP

Panel 2
Beth: I'm really excited to see what Reid's hair is like this season!
Tanner: I suddenly regret doing this.
Alex: Me too.

Kitty Witty, Bumble Bundle

2012-11-26T07:11:00.000-06:00

Panel 1
Beth: Tiger, hi! Hi Tiger! I want to snug you! You're my cute widdle kitty! I want to snug my cute widdle bumble bundle!

Panel 2
Tanner: (whine) Alex?!
Alex: Yes, Tanner?

Panel 3
Tanner: (whine) Beth!
Alex: Yeah, I know.
Beth: Little orange bon bon! Bon buns! Squee! Baby waby! Snuggle wuggle!

My Sugar

2012-11-21T07:22:00.000-06:00

Due to Alex's nutrition craze, I've restricted my sugar intake to one cup of tea a day (and 2 to 4 pieces of leftover Halloween candy). My pink 12oz Disney Princess mug with a 6-minute-long steeped Prince of Wales tea plus 3 heaping spoons of sugar and a dollop of skim milk is the best part of my day. I will defend every granule of that sugar to my last breath.

Alex: You can get addicted to sugar. Know what that means?
Beth: That you shouldn't take my sugar or I'll hurt you?

Jerk Alex

2012-11-19T14:16:00.001-06:00

For the entirety of our marriage, the biggest jerk I know has been my husband in my dreams. For some reason, Dream Alex is both stupid and mean and takes every opportunity to prove it. Real Alex has gotten used to this phenomenon, and when he woke me up to say goodbye this morning, I related the above. His response is preserved verbatim in panel 3.

Panel 1
Beth: I can't believe you took a job at a WalMart McDonald's and let the manager lady change your legal name to Mr. Dixon! Our name isn't even Dixon! It's nowhere near Dixon! And that lady was so happy to have you but you lied!

Panel 2
Beth: You weren't remotely going to work there! And I had to be a shrew and quit for you and make her change your name back and then she didn't even spell any of it right and I had to stand over her shoulder the whole time and you just wanted to go look at the electronics!

Panel 3
Alex: You have weird dreams, sweetie.

Panel 4
Beth: Dream you is a jerk.
Alex: Yes, we have established this.

Enjoying Each Other's Company

2012-11-04T13:19:00.000-06:00

Panel 1
Tanner: Tonight, I was thinking we could just enjoy each other's company.

Panel 2
n/a

Panel 3
Tanner: Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

Panel 4
All: Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

Panel 5
All: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

Panel 6
Tanner: T.V.?
Beth & Alex: T.V.

Weeding the Garden

2012-10-14T19:04:00.003-05:00

Completely true. *shudder*

Panel 1
Beth: So easy to weed after a rain!

Panel 2
Beth: Bleh, something cold landed between my toesies.
Grub: ?

Panel 3
Beth: AUGH!
Grub: Yeep!

The Diet: End

2012-09-01T07:38:00.000-05:00

Paleo diet. We did it for a month, just to try it. No carbs, no sugar, no dairy.

Panel 1
Alex: We're ending the diet early.

Panel 2
Beth: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Panel 3
Tanner: I mentioned pizza to Alex, and I sensed weakness. You're welcome.
Beth: Thank you.

The Re-up

2012-08-31T06:46:00.000-05:00

Panel 1
Beth: By the way, we're out of bar soap.
Alex: I'll add it to the list.

Panel 2
Beth: I was going to "reup" the shower, but my "stash" was gone.

Panel 3
Alex: Maybe we should take a break from The Wire for a week or so.
Beth: No.
Alex: Okay.

"Gassy"

2012-08-29T09:36:00.000-05:00

Panel 1
Beth: He's been alternately happy and gassy.
Leah: Home!

Panel 2
Leah: LOL. Only Jon's son could have a mood called "gassy."