Beth's Brain Injury Blog

Make a List

noreply@blogger.com (Larry and Beth Jameson) — Sun, 29 Aug 2010 09:48:00 +0000

Hey Gang, it's Larry again.

I'm filling in for Beth this week because she's all hyped up about a business trip she has coming up this week. She leaves in a few days for London, England, and will be teaching classes to different groups of people who don't speak English.

As you might imagine, she's just about to blow a fuse. "I've got to do this. I've got to do that. I've got to remember to ... Don't let me forget to..."

Last night I turned to her and said, "Make a List." After all, that is one of the best strategies for helping a faulty memory following a brain injury. And it's a strategy she knows. And it's a strategy she's written about time and time again.

However, we all get flustered from time to time. Each of us has those moments when our guard is not up like it should be...and life is standing there ready to throw an uppercut and send us reeling. Beth was having such a moment.

First, of course, she's taking an international flight without me. Then she'll need to change some of her money to English pounds. Naturally, the electricity in the hotel is not wired for American gadgets like hair dryers and such. And we haven't even gotten to the classes yet!

Yes, it's a stressful time. However, once she began making her list, things began to fall more into place. At least into a more manageable place.

We received an email this week from a lady whose brain was injured in a car wreck back in the 1980's. She had recently read our book ... and she realized she had been fooling herself and her family about her injury FOR 24 YEARS!

I want to share a part of it with you. "OMG, I loved, loved, loved your book!!!!!!!! I am a TBI survivor from 1986. Upon completing your book I am able (for the first time in 24 years) to admit that I have deficts that make me different from the regular non-brain injured population. I thought I was healed, I kept telling my family, friends and myself that I was 'normal', I have recreated my persona and am a happy person. But in reading your book I am comfortable that I get tired after working for 5 hours as a therapist. Your book has done for me more than I could ever imagine. What your book has done for me I wish to do for others. Thank God for you and your book!"

The point I want to make is this. That lady was writing 24 years after her injury; Beth just had her 31st anniversary. The effects of brain injury can jump up at any time. Just remember, when in doubt -- make a list.

A Funny Story

noreply@blogger.com (Larry and Beth Jameson) — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 09:58:00 +0000

Hi. Larry here today. I felt like I needed to share a funny email I received from a friend yesterday.

One of the couples in our group are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember. Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. "Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?" he asks.

"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

"Sure," he answered.

"Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" she asks.

"No, I can remember it."

"Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so as not to forget it?"

He says, "I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."

"I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?" she says rather emphatically.

Irritated, he says, "I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!"

Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, The old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment.

"Where's my toast ?"

Memory problems are very much a part of life for those living with brain injury. But, isn't it fun to laugh at...every once in a while?

Prioritize and Get Organized after Brain Injury

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 15 Aug 2010 13:45:00 +0000

Last week was an especially challenging one for me. It was one of those weeks where things just didn’t fall in line like they should and I was faced with a lot of decision-making and prioritizing. An essential element to living with brain injury is to prioritize and stay organized.

I find it helps to have lists when organizing my thoughts. At work or at home I like to write down all the things that come to mind that I need to get accomplished that day. Then I prioritize that list by importance. I don’t always finish everything I’ve written down, but by organizing it, I get to the most important items first. Then I just transfer the leftovers to the next list I create. There are a lot of references to lists in Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide since I believe they are a necessary tool for living successfully with brain injury.

It helps to remind myself that everything really important will get done and that the urgency I feel at the time will no longer be a concern once they are accomplished. So, when my brain starts to get scrambled, I know it’s time to stop and get organized.

Just like organizing and prioritizing my thoughts is essential to getting things accomplished, doing some physical organization is also very helpful to me. As Larry knows, I hate clutter! After a while it starts to cloud my ability to think. Suddenly all I can see is clutter, clutter, clutter. I get obsessed with it. Then it’s time to take some time to do some organizing, prioritizing and just plain old throwing some things out. It’s like my brain won’t go beyond how disturbed I am by the clutter. I guess it’s sort of like spring cleaning – only it happens more than once a year.

I’m hoping this week at the office will be less hectic, but if it’s not – I’m prepared to prioritize and get organized so I can insure all will go as smoothly as possible. One thing is for sure – this too shall pass and everything will work out.

Traveling with a Brain Injury

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 08 Aug 2010 13:08:00 +0000

Traveling with a brain injury is not too much of a big deal as long as you have someone with you that you can trust. However, traveling with a brain injury alone is an entirely different story. It surely can be done, but requires the use of compensatory strategies (such as those describe in Brain Injury Survivor's Guide), some confidence, and a bit of patience.

I was recently asked by my employer if I would consider making a trip to Europe to share information with some of our coworkers there. I agreed, but at this point, it has not been confirmed that I will be going. Nevertheless, it is on my mind pretty much daily because I know I will need to make use of my travel planning guidelines I wrote about back in June. To complicate things just a bit – I would leave two days after I am to return from a week’s vacation in New Orleans.

Several departments within the company have people going on the trip to Europe. So – you say – I wouldn’t be going alone. That depends on how you look at it. None, with the possible exception of one of those going, have any idea I live with a brain injury. That one person who may be going too; and who I’ve told about my brain injury, really doesn’t know the extent of how it controls my life. This situation is not as bad as traveling alone, but it’s pretty close to it.

I’ve tried not to think about it for now since I don’t even know for sure I’m going, but that’s hard to do since I need to be preparing as soon as possible. I know I will be fine if I plan ahead both for the travel and for what I am to do when I get there. It’s been a while since I’ve traveled alone and have not done it at all outside the country. I did threaten to go to Saint Martin ahead of Larry one year when he thought he was only going to be able to be gone for a week rather than the two we had planned. He couldn’t believe I would go without him. But, to me, it was doable – especially since he would be joining me later. Turns out he could make the two weeks after all, so it became a non issue.

The whole point of this article is that, yes, those of us with a brain injury can travel as long as we prepare ahead of time – realizing that plans can change in a heartbeat along the way. That’s when I rely on my compensatory strategies to get me though the rough spots. Then I can sit back, enjoy, and feel relief and a sense of accomplishment that only I can see as a big deal.

JUST BREATHE

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 14:03:00 +0000

Do you ever think about how great it is to be able to just breathe? I think about that a lot – especially this time of year.

Twenty-one years ago yesterday, I entered the hospital for routine major surgery – a hysterectomy. Thirty days later I left that hospital with only partial lung capacity. That was a miracle in itself considering the various obstacles I managed to overcome during that month. More about that in Brain Injury Survivor's Guide.

My anoxic brain injury occurred as a result of ARDS which was believed by most to have been brought on by the many blood transfusions I received following a mistake by the surgeon during the first surgery. A second surgery was “finally” performed to correct the problem – too late to prevent my brain injury.

Needless to say, over the years I have faced numerous stressful situations brought on as a result of having a brain injury. As a brain injury survivor or caregiver, I’m sure you can relate to that statement. I am always looking for ways to combat the daily stress in my life – whether it’s good stress or bad. Excitement can be stressful to someone who lives with brain injury. Sometimes when I am excited about a situation or event, I can’t really enjoy the moment as I should because I am constantly reminding myself of all the things that could go wrong and how I need to “be careful”. You know what I’m talking about don’t you? “This is great! – but what if, what if, what if?”

So – back to the subject – “Just Breathe”. That is one of my best compensatory strategies. After quite a while, I was finally able to take a deep breath. I realized what a blessing it is just to be able to do that. So, when I start to get frantic, or even a little frustrated, I take a deep breath to remind myself to put things into perspective. I can take a deep breath – I can walk around without being tethered to a machine that helps me breathe – how great is that!

I decided several years ago to concentrate on what is really important in my life. That would be my family and my independence. When I get super stressed or when I’m just feeling sorry for myself, I just breathe.

Try it if you start to feel overwhelmed. Just breathe and think about how great it is to be able to take a deep breath.

MISSING MYSELF AFTER BRAIN INJURY

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 21:54:00 +0000

Brain injury recovery is often a misused term because it makes people think they may be able to return to the way things were before the head trauma.

My anoxic brain injury happened while I was in the hospital for routine surgery where I required a second surgery to correct a mistake which caused me to bleed internally. For about 30 hours the hospital staff gave me blood transfusion after blood transfusion trying to elevate my count. But it was like pouring water into a hula hoop; it was just going right through. Little did I know at the time that portions of my brain were dying as the doctors tried to determine the cause. And so would begin the reason I would be missing myself after brain injury.

I developed ARDS (acute respiratory distress syndrome) commonly caused by massive blood transfusions. My lungs filled with fluid, leaving no room for air, and I stopped breathing. No one knows how long I lay in bed in that condition, but I was discovered by a nurse. A Code Blue was sounded and emergency procedures were initiated to save my life.

I was put into a medically-induced coma to allow my body to fight the ARDS. My kidneys quit working, so another specialist joined the team. Then my fingers and toes turned blue due to the lack of oxygen and a specialist was called in to discuss amputations. Larry was on alert and stopped that drastic measure.

I guess it's kind of silly to say I woke up. Otherwise, I wouldn't be writing this. But I woke up to a strange world. I didn't know who Larry was, even though we'd been married 20 years. I didn't even know I was married and had two children. Another reason I would be missing myself after brain injury.

I couldn't see very well, I couldn’t remember things, I couldn’t’ think, I was emotional – the symptoms of brain injury continued to grow. My personality was flat and I had no initiative, so I really didn't care about any of those chores I'd forgotten how to perform. Total confusion ruled my life and I began to miss myself even more.

Months later my ophthalmologist sent me for an MRI and, finally, it was discovered my brain had been injured. Yes, I'd had MRI's in the hospital but I think they were looking at my abdomen lungs and kidneys and not my brain.

Fifteen months after my injury I was finally admitted for brain injury rehabilitation but as good as some of the therapists were, the program was only about 4 months in duration and new problems still came at me every day.

Larry and I had already begun developing strategies that would help me perform without a short term memory and without some of the cognitive skills I'd had previously. Lists, lists and more lists became a way of life ... and still are.

Like most brain injury victims, I was told I would probably never work again. With the strategies Larry and I developed I was able to return to work and even was eventually promoted. I was even able to move into a position I probably would not have reached for prior to my brain injury.

Myself- that is - I never returned completely, but I learned how to live in my new world. Not just live, but to live successfully. If there is any one word of advice I would give, it would be this: Never Give Up! Learn as much as you can, and keep on trying!!! There just might be a better life out there than the one before.

It’s your life; LIVE IT!

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 18 Jul 2010 12:59:00 +0000

No one can live your life but you—that’s why I chose the title – It’s your life; Live IT! There are others in your life who have influence over how you choose to live your life, but ultimately you are in control (or out of control).

I was inspired to write this article after a visit to the nail salon yesterday. I am often inspired by this young Vietnamese couple who run the shop I have been going to for years. As citizens, they have embraced a lot of our American culture over the years (some good – some not so good), but they seem to have a very basic philosophy when it comes to living and appreciating life.

As the young woman was working on my nails, we were having a discussion about how important it is to live life and enjoy our families while we’re here on earth - to go out and spend a little of that money we work so hard to get day after day. Their salon is open 6 days a week from early to late with an occasional extra day off for popular holidays. They have three small children and she’s always talking about how much she enjoys spending time with them. In addition, she somehow finds time to go shopping which is just about her favorite pastime – thus, the topic of our conversation yesterday.

I think we should surround ourselves with encouragement and humor. No good comes from being down and sad all the time. Sometimes we have to have a talk with ourselves to get back on track. In less than a month it will have been 21 years since my anoxic brain injury occurred. Nonetheless, in many ways it seems like yesterday.

Our goal is to help all those affected by brain injury: victims, family members, friends and co-workers by showing the way to a prosperous and happy Life After Brain Injury. I still have the same brain injury I had 21 years ago. What has made the difference is learning to live with my brain injury by constantly using compensatory strategies practiced over and over again. Check out this page on Brain Injury Guide which contains some uplifting items available for purchase that offer encouragement. All purchases in this store help support the mission of braininjuryguide.org.

Keep it simple. Look at what’s “really” important in life. It’s your life; live it!

Take Immediate Action!

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 11 Jul 2010 16:31:00 +0000

I have to tell you, this gulf oil spill has really upset me. I love the ocean as you are aware if you read this blog regularly. It breaks my heart to see all the animals, fish and fowl that are suffering as a result of oil company greed and procrastination. I could go on and on about how people have chosen money over doing the right thing.

We all know that accidents happen – all kinds. I can’t think of an instance where procrastination is better than taking immediate action. Take brain injury for instance – since this is a brain injury blog. We are told be those in the medical profession that taking immediate action after a brain injury is imperative to a better outcome. In other words, the sooner a person is diagnosed, the sooner a treatment program can begin.

Unfortunately, for those of us who acquired a brain injury in a manner other than a “traumatic brain injury", there is little hope for being able to “take immediate action”. In my case, I struggled with the my anoxic brain injury for about a year and a half before I even knew that was what had occurred. I really thought I had lost my mind as did others around me. During the extended time I was in the hospital, they did MRI after MRI of my abdomen since that was the area of the surgery. My family was told repeatedly that the “other” problems I was having were most likely the result of all the morphine they had given me during my ARDS. And – that’s a whole other story which you can read about in Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide.

As evidenced by the gulf oil spill, the longer a mistake or accident is allowed to grow, the worse it gets. In the case of an undiagnosed brain injury – it could lead to death. I’m not just talking about death due to the injury alone. As those of you who are living with brain injury know from experience, the frustration alone can cause thoughts of suicide. I can’t quote the statistic, but I know that suicide is very high among those who have suffered a brain injury and even some caregivers who decide they can’t take it anymore.

I hope this latest effort by BP will work and we can begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Obviously, they should have been prepared but since they were not we all hope this latest effort will turn things around.

I eventually got my life back on track after my brain injury; I encourage other brain injury victims and caregivers to take immediate action now. Don’t procrastinate – it will only get worse. There is light at the end of the tunnel – we just have to dig in the right direction and never give up!

Independence Day

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 04 Jul 2010 13:27:00 +0000

Happy 4th of July – Independence Day!

Wow – I know this annually celebrated day represents the independence of the United States from Great Britain. But, today I want to talk about another type of Independence Day – a day when you or I are able to stop depending on others for things we can do ourselves even when we have a brain injury.

Some of us desired it from the beginning but didn’t know how to get there. Others are content to depend on their family or other people for their every need. No matter which of these personalities, a person who has an acquired brain injury needs to learn how to be independent which will ultimately provide for a more fulfilling life.

For independent-minded (or hard headed) me, discovering ways to do things myself – not having to depend on others – made me feel free. My brain had been caged with no lock in sight. A daily thought was “how can I get out of here? – how can I be free?”

I know I talk an awful lot about compensatory strategies in this blog – that’s because I know how helpful they are for so many reasons, but especially when it comes to finding independence. Knowledge is Power – knowledge can give you independence! This phrase is used over and over again in Brain Injury Survivor's Guide.

I hope everyone has a safe and fun 4th of July. What a great day to begin striving for independence from brain injury!

TRAVEL PLANNING GUIDELINES

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 27 Jun 2010 19:57:00 +0000

Summer is here and vacations are beginning to take shape. I discovered early in my brain injury that traveling could be a nightmare if I didn’t prepare ahead of time. Prior to my anoxic brain injury, I could just grab the necessary items at the last minute and deal with everything else as it occurred. If I ran into obstacles along the way, I had every confidence I could handle whatever came up.

After my brain injury, I can still feel confident when going on a trip – whether out of the country or within the US. The difference is – I MUST plan ahead and use my travel planning guidelines every time. The only way I can “wing it” now is if I have no other choice. That’s when I reach for my compensatory strategies to help me though the situation.

The article Travel Planning Guidelines, from the Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide website, can be useful when planning a trip and can help reduce stress so you can actually enjoy the planning process. There are some great links to airports too.

If you’re planning to travel this summer, relax and enjoy. Compensate for the abilities you lost by using strategies. One of those strategies can be to use some travel planning guidelines.

The Importance of a Supportive Environment

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 16:07:00 +0000

Larry and I just returned from the 2nd annual get-together of some of his close classmates that we both grew up with when we lived in a small Arkansas town many years ago. It’s a gathering of our childhood friends we hope to continue for years to come.

I will admit, last year I was a little skeptical of how I would fit in. I was a couple of grades behind them in school even though I was around them a lot since where Larry was -- I was (most of the time). At the end of the gathering last year, the gang officially claimed me as part of their class. One guy even made the statement that he thought I was in their class anyway. This year was no exception as all of the spouses have become “part of the group”.

Acceptance for who you are after a brain injury is so very important. The first thing I had to do was to recognize that I had an anoxic brain injury and then accept my limitations. Since I love my independence, Larry and I knew we would have to find a way for me to keep as much of it as I could. Someone living with brain injury needs to feel accepted and know they will not be judged for everything they do or say since some types of brain injury can also affect behavior.

For instance, the brain injured person who possess the symptom of memory problems (as a lot do), has the tendency to feel overwhelmed as they search their brain to find the correct word to finish the sentence. The harder we try and the more pressure to hurry to find that word, the more difficult it becomes to relax and either finally come up with the word or use compensatory strategies to overcome the situation gracefully.

I know, in my case, when I don’t feel pressured to remember, I have less difficulty. I’m not sure why unless it allows my brain time to pull information from my long-term memory which triggers the correct answer. That’s just my theory – nothing official.

To tell you the truth, I think time helps more than anything. The more times I’m faced with what I think at the time are unbearable and/or embarrassing situations, the more relaxed I am when it happens again. I’ve sort of taken the attitude that life is really, really short and there will be another day after I get through the current crisis.

All of that said I know that people who are in the early stages of their brain injury are going though some very stressful times. And – let’s not forget about the family or extremely close friends. My heart goes out to them because I know how painful that is for them. I have suffered through it and have watched Larry and others in my family as they endured their own stress and frustration.

Let me bounce back to the subject of this article – a supportive environment. A person’s environment will vary depending on where they are and what they are doing. I found when I moved from the brain injury rehabilitation facility, I was uncomfortable being outside the house. I had become “comfortable” in that safe environment. Everyone there either had a brain injury or was there with the purpose of helping someone who did. There was no need to explain every mistake or the loss of words while trying to carry on a conversation.

The environment changed with each new endeavor – going back to work – going grocery shopping – driving – going on a trip that involved flying. These are events that occur in everyone’s “normal” life, but when trying to learn to live with brain injury, it is necessary to find your own way of grabbing all of the independence you can. Take advantage of every compensatory strategy that fits your need and even develop some of your own. And, don’t forget the importance of a supportive environment.

Flash Flood at Camp Albert Pike

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 13:14:00 +0000

It’s vacation season – a time when families gather for some relaxation from day to day life. Camp Albert Pike located in Arkansas is in a national park on the Little Missouri River and is in the news a lot these days due to the flash flood that occurred there a few days ago. The news stories caught my attention since my mom owns one of the cabins there. It was passed down to her from my grandparents who are both now deceased.

They started camping in the national park many years ago prior to purchasing the cabin. I’m not sure exactly how long ago that was, but I’ve heard stories about camping there with me when I was a tiny baby (which was many, many years ago). The cabin was purchased about 40 years ago according to my mom. I remember celebrating my first son’s birthday there when he was three.

We won’t be able to find out if the cabin is still standing for several days since, unfortunately, officials are still searching for bodies. We were thankful that none of our family was there at the time, but I learned yesterday that the wife of one of my second cousins was swept away by the raging water when she slipped as the family was climbing a tree to escape to safety. Her body was found, but many others are still missing.

Life can be rolling along and in an instant it can change. I thought about how fast the water rose and how it came without warning. Since a large portion of my life centers around the effects of brain injury, for obvious reasons, I thought about how fast I went from being completely normal to having a brain injury. It happens in an instant – you’re normal – then you’re not.

Suddenly nothing was the same anymore – just like I’m sure we’ll see changes once we can check out the cabin – if it is still there. As a result of my acquired brain injury, my cognitive abilities were all but gone. It took time and tenacity to get to where I am today. I had to rebuild my life using various compensatory strategies. Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide explains how those who have suffered a brain injury, as well as caregivers, can use these tools to live a more fulfilling life. I suspect from those who were able to survive the flood there is a possibility some may have suffered a traumatic brain injury. I hope that is not the case, but it is likely considering the dangerous environment surrounding them.

Life is full of unexpected tragedies. Larry and I send our condolences to those who have lost loved ones as a result of the flood at Camp Albert Pike.

Exercise after Brain Injury

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 06 Jun 2010 15:55:00 +0000

Larry and I have a trip planned in a couple of weeks to visit long-time classmate friends. We haven’t seen most of them for a year and some of them we haven’t seen in a very long time. Of course we want to look our best, so several weeks ago, we joined a neighborhood gym. Until about three years ago, we worked out regularly, but a number of “excuses” caused us to get away from it over time. Exercise after brain injury is extremely therapeutic.

Since we joined the gym, I have been stopping on my way home from work every day to get in a workout before going home. As I was leaving the office, I noticed that Larry left his phone in my car when he drove it prior to my leaving that morning.

Now, I always feel great after my workouts – but I think my subconscious continues to look for an excuse not to. Why do I do that? After all, I just said (and believe) exercise after brain injury is extremely therapeutic. That said – as I was driving home, I was trying to convince myself to go on home instead of working out – after all, I had Larry’s phone and he might need it – right? Besides that, it was Friday!

I finally did decide I would go home. That meant I would need to change lanes. As I began to merge into the right lane, I felt a big bump and thought – what the h*&%? It turns out I had hit a car already in that lane. I did look – but didn’t see the car there. Was it because the car was in my (anybody’s) bind spot, or was it because of my lack of peripheral vision (did I just go through the motions of looking and no really see?) I will never know the answer to that question. Thankfully, no one was injured and it was yet another reminder of how careful I need to be when driving.

Early after my anoxic brain injury, panic would have set in immediately. My first thought would have been to call Larry. Realizing I had his phone and couldn’t get in touch with him would have put me over the top and I would have been in tears and hysterical.

However, this time I was amazed at how in control I remained. I can’t say I was completely calm inside, but I remained in control – using my compensatory strategies as I worked my way through the process of dealing with an accident. I tried not to get ahead of myself and I took it a step at a time. I told myself I would just see how far I could go before I got all upset about the situation. Surprisingly, I made it all the way home without “losing it” – and then I gave myself a big pat on the back. It was a big thing for me. Tomorrow I would address the challenge of getting my car repaired.

I know there are those of you who understand what I’m saying - especially since the majority of those who read this blog either are brain injured, or are closely involved with someone who is. We all take our routine-like abilities for granted until we don’t have them anymore.

When faced with any crisis, I first try to remind myself that at least I am here to have an opportunity to address these problems. Here is a pdf file of Chapter One of Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide (Welcome to Our World). You are welcome to download and read it completely free of charge. This is what I’m referring to when I mention reminding myself that I’m glad I’m still here.

BRAIN INJURY MEMORY PROBLEMS

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 30 May 2010 23:47:00 +0000

Brain injury and memory problems go hand in hand in most cases. While all brain injuries are different (like snowflakes), memory problems are common in a lot of them.

I chose this cartoon for this article first because I thought it was really funny and second because it is a great example of what we as brain injury victims have to cope with from day to day. If you haven’t already discovered it for yourself, let me tell you, we need to see the humor in our circumstances or we’ll go nuts.

Thank goodness for compensatory strategies or I would miss the boat more often than not. Early in my brain injury after Larry and I decided to take the humorous approach to some of the outrageous things I did, we began to relax more and go with the flow.

There are a number of humorous events with regard to memory problems mentioned in Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide. In some circumstances I couldn’t see the humor in the beginning. But, soon I discovered it was better to laugh than cry about it since it is what it is.

Earlier I mentioned strategies for compensating for memory loss. Compensatory strategies are so so so important to coping with memory problems after brain injury. I can talk about the humor resulting from memory problems now, but, believe me, it was no laughing matter in the beginning. It was frustrating to say the least. But, as I began to use strategies to compensate for my memory loss, the trauma and drama involving lack of memory became fewer and further between and I could take an “oh well” approach in most cases.

Even at this point in my life, I would never say that I have overcome the challenges I live with as a result of my brain injury. However, I can say that with the use of the strategies I have learned and the knowledge I have gained about my brain injury, I can live a more fulfilling life and can even see some humor in my situation from time to time.

I want that peace for everyone who is living with brain injury. I know there are various degrees of brain injury, but my desire is for everyone to reach their full potential. Sadly, some will not, but Larry and I want to share all of the knowledge we have gained about brain injury over the years with the hope that more people will be able to reach that goal of independence.

Just remember to take a laid back approach when you forget -- (Oh crap! Was that today?) :)

Brain Injury Memory Compensatory Strategies

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Mon, 24 May 2010 02:42:00 +0000

The article I am publishing today will be the 102nd post to this blog. It was my intention to mention this milestone at the 100th post, but I forgot. I suppose that is no big surprise for those who know me well since memory has not been my strong point since my brain injury in 1990.

When Larry first suggested I start a brain injury blog I was not that interested. Frankly, I didn’t think I had that much to say. But, as it turns out, it has been very therapeutic for me and my hope is always that some of the information I share is helpful to someone else. This has been my way to reach out to others who are struggling the way I did before I began to use memory compensatory strategies so I could become more independent and self-reliant.

In fact, that is why Larry and I wrote Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide. I was so determined to be independent again and Larry was frustrated as he tried to find the information that could help me. I did spend a few months at a brain injury rehabilitation facility which helped, but we needed something more to make life appear normal. I say “appear” normal because I know I will never be “normal”. But, using compensatory strategies has gotten me through many potentially embarrassing and frustrating situations.

I want to point you to a Brain Injury Memory Compensatory Strategies article from our Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide website. You may be able to relate to some of the frustrations expressed by the (anonymous) survivor. Even though it has been years since my brain injury, I can still relate to that feeling of being helpless and insecure.

So, I plan to continue writing blog articles until I can think of nothing else to say. And, I can assure you Larry doesn’t see that happening anytime soon.

Brain Injured Mom

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 09 May 2010 13:10:00 +0000

Today, on Mother’s Day I am so thankful for my two wonderful boys. They are grown men now, but still are and always will be my little boys. They make me so happy to be a mom every day, not just on Mother’s Day.

I am also fortunate to have a great mom myself. This is the woman who never left the hospital the entire time I was there after my ARDS which resulted in my anoxic brain injury. She stayed in the waiting room every day that I was in MICU which allowed Larry time to continue to work and be available for our boys during the time he was not at the hospital. After I was moved to a room from ICU, she stayed with me until my discharge from the hospital. Had she not done that, I would have had to stay in ICU longer and I REALLY wanted out of there. I can’t remember a time in my life when she was not there for me. That’s because she always was.

As a mom, I have always wanted to be there for my boys too. Prior to my brain injury, I made sure I was available for any need they had. There were times when Larry’s job made him unavailable to be there with us, but that didn’t stop me from getting the boys to where they needed to be. It really was no big deal from me to take off to another town or state for some sports tournament they were participating in. After my brain injury that all changed. I couldn’t go anywhere without Larry. I became extremely dependent on him and I hated being dependent on anyone. I wanted my independence back but didn’t know how to get it.

When I was at the brain injury rehabilitation facility, I met a woman who had several small children. She had been a stay at home mom who was extremely organized and ran her household with the utmost efficiency. I don’t remember what caused her traumatic brain injury, but it changed her life dramatically – as most brain injuries do no matter what kind.

She could no longer cook, do laundry, organize lunches for her children, or perform any of the many activities that came with such ease to her before. She was at the facility to get back her independence and to learn to be an efficient mom again. I wasn’t close to her, but I know she was well on her way to learning compensatory strategies that would allow her to go home and be there for her children and husband again.

The point of this article is to let brain injured moms know they should not give up. Although it is frustrating (especially at first), there are strategies out there which will allow brain injured moms to continue to be there for their children.

I always tell my boys – "there may be better mom’s out there, but there is not a better one for you – because no mom loves you more than I do. That makes me the best mom you could ever have."

Happy Mother’s Day!

Brain Workout – Never Give Up

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 02 May 2010 20:52:00 +0000

We are well into spring and the closer it gets to summer the more I am reminded I need to get into shape. I will be the first to admit I have sort of “let myself go” over the past couple of years. I weigh more now than ever before in my life except for the couple of times I was pregnant. There are a few reasons for that – mainly I eat too much, drink too much, and don’t get enough exercise. You would think since I know that I would do something about it.

I do have plans to correct the situation. The problem is, I’ve had various plans for some time now but have yet to follow through. Still, I have no intention of giving up. I will never give up because it is not in my DNA. I truly believe that is why I survived ARDS in 1990 and the resulting anoxic brain injury. I just would not give up.

Whether it’s a physical workout or a brain workout, it is necessary to make daily workouts a habit and a lifestyle change in order to see results. And, just as you need to give the body a rest when performing a physical workout, it is necessary to give the brain a time to rest when you are working it out. (By the way, working out your body also can give your brain a rest).

Since I have not physically worked out in a while I know it will not be an easy thing to get started again. It was no different when I began to strive for my independence after brain injury. I had to start slowly and regain my confidence. It was discouraging at times as I struggled to use the strategies I had developed to compensate for the cognitive, memory and social skills I had lost as a result of the brain injury. However, I would never give up. It was unacceptable - even though I wanted to many times.

If you have ever stuck to a physical workout program long enough to see results, you know how rewarding it is and how good it makes you feel. The same is true when you give your brain a workout. There is a feeling of accomplishment and confidence builds. The more I challenge my injured brain, the more confident I feel about my situation. I find new ways of doing things. I also find myself “going for things” I would not have even prior to my brain injury.
Now, I hate to admit this, but I am getting older. Larry will tell you I am quite vain. He can’t say much though because he is too. I just recently realized I can’t workout as hard and heavy as I used to when we both went to the gym on a regular basis. But, I am determined to start again at a pace that is sensible for me.

The same is true for an injured brain. The brain needs to rest – especially if there has been an injury. Be sure to make time for your brain to rest to prepare for the next brain workout.

Forgetting My Brain Injury

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 20:31:00 +0000

It is amazing to me how often I temporarily forget I have a brain injury. I can say that now after 20 years, but believe me when I say I still know I have one.

Actually, it sort of scares me when I realize I’ve been going along through life forgetting my brain injury. That’s because I realize how dangerous it can be in certain circumstances. It’s great when I don’t get confused when making purchases or have difficulty trying to recall information in certain situations. However, when I realize I’ve been gone for hours and really didn’t think about my driving, it sort of scares me. The reason being – I have no peripheral vision as a result of my brain injury. I’m sure you can see the danger in not paying close attention when you are driving.

As with anyone else, some things I do when driving are just automatic. I believe one of those automatic responses for me now is to turn my head a lot to compensate for not having peripheral vision. But, since I don’t remember doing that while I was out, I just have to hope I did and thank my many angels for watching out for me.

The same holds true for eating out with friends. My routine involves paying close attention to where everything is placed on the table (especially drinks) so I won’t accidentally spill or knock things off the table. But, if it happens to be one of those days when I’m going through life not thinking about my brain injury, accidents are likely to happen.

I’m glad I sometimes forget I have a brain injury as long as I can remain safe and keep from embarrassing myself. It’s nice when my compensatory strategies kick in automatically and I don’t have to try so hard to do the things others do without thinking about them.

For any of you who are just starting to learn some compensatory strategies in order to have a more fulfilling life, I want to encourage you to learn them and develop as many of you own as you can. We have encorporated a lot of the strategies I use into the development of Brain Injury Survivor's Guide.

Believe me, knowing these strategies can make your life better. You may even get to the point where you temporarily forget you have a brain injury.

Brain Injury Irony - Looking Back

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 18 Apr 2010 16:32:00 +0000

I’m about to have a birthday so I’ve been reminiscing a bit and thinking about how my life has played out so far. I sometimes play the “what if” game. Have you ever done that? If you do, you’ll probably find some irony in a number of the circumstances.

What if I had gone to college?
What if I had been rich?
What if I had been born into a family that didn’t show their love?
What if I had not sustained a brain injury?

Of course I can’t go backward and I can’t change what my circumstances were years ago. I can only learn from my mistakes and go forward no matter what my current stage is in life. In most instances I would not want to change my past. I think of all the people who would not be in my life today if things had gone a different direction and it makes me so thankful. I definitely would not change that part of my life.

All articles in this blog are brain injury related – thus the title Beth’s Brain Injury Blog. So - back to thinking about the past.....

I was driving (on my way to work), and thinking about my childhood. (I do a lot thinking when I’m driving) In particular – not sure what triggered it – I was thinking about when I was in elementary school learning the multiplication tables. I was just not getting it. Most likely it was because I was trying to think of a way to get around having to memorize them. Anyway, my mom “somehow” knew I was struggling in that area – maybe a bad report card?

Soon after that, she had me sitting on a kitchen stool as she continued to cook, drilling me on the multiplication tables. Being stubborn I fought her efforts at first, but to no avail – she was determined I would memorize those multiplication tables. She even insisted on including the 11s and 12s even though I kept insisting I only had to learn them though the 10s.

Nevertheless, I did memorize them and the fact that I did served me well for years. That is until my anoxic brain injury in 1990. Let’s just say I am thankful in today’s world there are calculators, computers and smartphones.

So, the irony, in this case, is that no matter how much effort I had put into learning those multiplication tables, that knowledge was gone in an instant when my anoxic brain injury occurred. The lack of oxygen to my brain wiped the slate clean in an area that can never be written on again. Because that was explained to me by a knowledgeable and caring brain injury therapist, I understood how important it was for me to use other areas of my brain and to find new tools to compensate for that loss.

This is not the only area of brain injury irony in my life and each brain injury survivor has several of his or her own. We can look back for a glimpse of the past and the irony in many circumstances, but we must continue to move forward to find the better life that is ahead of us.

Brain Injury Hospital Stories

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 17:13:00 +0000

When you are in the hospital, it’s like being in an entirely different world. That is also true for family members who are there constantly for their loved one. Note: It is necessary these days for every patient to have someone to watch out for them when they are in a hospital. You cannot count on the hospital staff to do that any longer.

As a patient lying in the hospital bed day after day with an anoxic brain injury, I lived in another world. I could not relate to what was going on around me much less what was happening outside those four walls. I found out later that August in 1990 was a very eventful month as I lay in a medically induced coma. I had no idea! I felt somewhat like Rip Van Winkle when I was told about it.

Recently one of my co-workers spent some time with his dad who is in the hospital recovering from some heart surgery. We all laughed as he told of his boredom - there with nothing to do but watch TV since he had left the office in a hurry and didn’t even have his laptop with him.

His father wanted to watch baseball on TV. Now, my co-worker is not particularly fond of baseball, but there was nothing else to do so he watched. Since his dad had been given some pretty strong drugs it was not unexpected that he would fall asleep periodically. The problem was, every time he woke up, he would rewind the game to watch the part he missed after he fell asleep. Which meant - my co-worker not only was watching baseball, which was not his favorite thing, he was watching the same thing over and over again.

He said he finally began to play games on his Blackberry to keep from going crazy. We all thought that was pretty funny, but not so much for him at the time. Thankfully, his dad is beginning to recover.

My family has many stories they could tell about their experience during my hospital stay. Some are pretty humorous, even though they were not so funny at the time. When you do survive a crisis it helps to recall the lighter side of things. I think that is why being able to communicate with others who have had similar experiences is so helpful.

If you have a brain injury hospital story you would like to share, feel free to send it to Brain Injury Stories - Share Yours, Help Others in the Brain Injury Online site.

Travel Planning Guidelines

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 04 Apr 2010 21:57:00 +0000

It’s time to start your travel planning if you have a trip coming up and have not already done so. This time of year, and for the next few months, people will be planning their vacations and short weekend trips. Few people, and especially not those living with a brain injury, can throw something together at the last minute without forgetting essentials.

Whether you have a brain injury, or just need some help planning your travel, the Travel Planning Guidelines page in the Brain Injury Survivor’s Guide site should be of some help.

Not only is it fun to plan your trip in advance, it is essential for those of us who live with brain injury. I keep these guidelines handy as well as a standard list of necessities to take on every trip. Of course, what is a necessity to me might not be yours. In addition to my medications, I also include skin care and make up which I consider to be necessities.

Time for relaxation is a very important for someone living with brain injury. It is important to the victim of the actual injury as well as to the person(s) providing the daily support. Planning a trip together to a place where you can get away from some of the day-to-day stress of brain injury helps to provide some temporary relief. That does not mean things are suddenly all better. It just means there is usually a more relaxed atmosphere which allows time for the brain to rest and prepare for battle.

I hope you enjoy your summer and that these travel planning guidelines are helpful to you.

A New Beginning

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 00:40:00 +0000

Spring is upon us. It’s like a new beginning to the year. When you’ve had a brain injury, the first step to living with it is to find a new beginning. After my anoxic brain injury my life was never the same. My family still loved me, but beyond that, all had changed. Once I moved past the denial stage, I had to understand the next step was a new beginning.

I was blessed with a great short term memory prior to brain injury. You don’t realize what an asset that is until you don’t have it anymore. I lost that as a result of my anoxic brain injury which occurred as a result of a routine surgery. It’s really disturbing to see so many people take that for granted.

Another thing I took for granted was my peripheral vision. I now live with tunnel vision. I have learned to live with both of these disabilities over the years. It was not easy, but it was necessary for me to learn to live without both of these.

I had to “start over” in so many ways after my brain injury. Once I got past the denial stage after brain injury I began to find ways of surviving and to develop strategies for a new beginning.

That’s what each of us living with brain injury must do. We have to find ways of making our way through life. We have been given different challenges depending on the type of brain injury. But there is a compensatory strategy for most every situation we face. If there’s not a “standard” one, then create your own. There is a way to do everything - we just have to figure out what it is.

This is a great time of year to re-focus. Step back and take a look at the big picture. Treat it like it’s a new beginning.

Your Brain’s Comfort Zone

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 21 Mar 2010 13:26:00 +0000

I was reading a magazine article yesterday about pushing past your comfort zone. Of course, the person writing it was talking about the general population. But it brought to mind my comfort zone experiences as someone who lives with an anoxic brain injury.

We all have certain areas of our life that are “outside our comfort zone” -- Whether it’s

not feeling comfortable in crowds,
trying new places,
meeting new people,
etc., etc., etc.

Of course, a recently diagnosed brain injury victim has a whole host of insecurities and a lot of situations are outside their comfort zone.

I recall early in my (not yet diagnosed) brain injury how insecure I was. All of the areas mentioned above were outside of my brain’s comfort zone in additional to a lot more. Even today, I don’t like to be in a large crowd unless I am anchored to a particular spot. I hated being in a new place or meeting new people at that time. I didn’t even feel secure when I went back to work at the place I had been employed for years. Suddenly, everything looked different and actually some areas had changed. I was not good dealing with change at all at that time. And, the fact that I no longer had peripheral vision made things even worse. Even now, I sometimes let down my guard and forget to use the strategies developed to cope with this brain injury disability.

One thing I do know that helps to improve my comfort zone is knowledge. Knowledge is Power which allows me to enter my comfort zone. Read about it in Brain Injury Survivor's Guide. Here’s a “for instance” –

I have been invited to participate in an event with a group of people to a place I have not been in quite a long time and that I know has changed a great deal over time. Now, if Larry was accompanying me – not a problem. Whenever I’m with him, I am completely comfortable with my surroundings. In this case, however, he will not be there.

Now, what I usually do in this type of situation is make a “trial run”. That is, I go to the place ahead of time (with Larry) for a preview. That way, I know what to expect. I don’t think that’s going to be possible this time. So, in this case, I’ll just have to sike myself up – reminding myself that “I can do it” and that I have strategies in place to deal with situations that may arrive.

Bottom line – out of comfort zone? – take actions to make it more comfortable. Sometimes it is not possible to do a lot to make an upcoming event comfortable. However, in most cases, I have found things turn out just fine and sometimes I am pleasantly surprised at how well they went. The best thing is that I have now been there and the place or situation has moved into my comfort zone – not to mention it gives me great satisfaction to know I survived it!

I know to some people this seems like a “silly” thing to worry about. But those of you living with brain injury and those caregivers who really understand brain injury know exactly where I’m coming from.

Brain Injury Fatigue

noreply@blogger.com (Beth) — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 15:59:00 +0000

Sometimes I just get tired of thinking and need a break from it. Brain Injury Fatigue is common among those who are living with any type of brain injury. I know from experience that it is a major factor for anyone who suffers from an anoxic brain injury. As a matter of fact, any type of brain injury that involves cognitive abilities creates fatigue after a period of time.

Mental fatigue has signs. A person loses the ability to focus on concentrate. The attention span shortens considerably. There may be vocal expressions of confusion and frustration. "Why can't I remember...?"

When this happens, it's time to take a break from whatever is being done. Deep breathing, listening to music and taking a walk are three things that can help get away from situations that ignite the Cycle of Response.

Stress causes mental fatigue. Those of you familiar with our book, Brain Injury Survivor's Guide, know that we devoted Chapter Six to what we called the Cycle of Response. This stress and fatigue-busting knowledge can make the difference in the type of life you live.

1st - know that brain injury fatigue is real.
2nd - understand how it works.
3rd - use every strategy available to fight it.

Brain Injury Fatigue happens, but you can control it instead of it controlling you.

Relaxation and Independence

noreply@blogger.com (Larry and Beth Jameson) — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:34:00 +0000

Hi. Larry here. I'm borrowing Beth's blog for a few minutes today to talk about stress relief and ways to relax. Yes, yes, I know that's a lot easier said than done most of the time. Following an accident that results in brain injury, it's pretty hard for anyone to relax...sometimes for years.

Stress for a brain injury survivor brings with it all kinds of other problems as you run up and down the Cycle of Response. Your brain tires more quickly. You get confused more easily. Then comes frustration and, well, it just sort of goes down hill from there, doesn't it?

Stress is equally difficult to manage for the family caregiver, the one responsible for helping the brain injury survivor. As you regular readers know, Beth's injury happened over 20 years ago, and I've been her caregiver since that time. Yes, she has certainly retrained many of her executive functions and created many, many new memories, and that has all helped her cognition. She functions so well that most people would never know she has a problem of any kind. Unless they knew her as well as I do.

I've corresponded with many caregivers over the years, and they all have one thing in common: they're tired. They're tired of dealing with brain injury; they're tired of dealing with doctors; they're tired of dealing with insurance companies; they're tired of dealing with therapists; they're tired of dealing with government agencies; they're tired of dealing...period.

Twice this month Beth and I have "gone out" for a romantic dinner...at our house. Once we ordered out and brought the food home; the other time, I cooked. We call these dinners our Euro moments because we will spend two hours dining and talking while listening to soft "love song" music.

The rules for the evening are "no rules". We can, and do, talk about anything without fear of judgment, ridicule or someone getting upset. Not only are these Euro moments a good way to step outside the normal world and have a little brain relaxation, it's also a time to practice independence and the all-important communication.

The economy has a lot of folks talking about staycations and playcations. These are strategies that have been practiced in the brain injury community for years. They are a way to take time away from the normal world and relax.

Beth and I try to do something every week. I believe you'll feel better and a little more refreshed if you'd do it, too.