Come You Who Are Weary

Matthew  11:28-30 invites us to come in our tiredness and weariness.  It implies that coming in this way assures a lighter load.  Most of us seem to experience our spiritual life as anything but lighter.  Instead our spiritual life is often heavy, burdensome and exhausting.  Why?  Perhaps we are trying to “do” God rather than enter into a relationship with Him.  Often our prayers are petitions to God to help us do something or a request for Him to do something.  Our spiritual activity is more often motivated by guilt of what we should be doing for God.  Where is the rest? 
    Many times our spiritual life leaves us hopeless, lonely and depressed.  The main reason we feel this spiritual and emotional turmoil is because we have filled our lives with substitutes and false loves.  We have forgotten how to rest.
    Rest is more than the absence of doing something.  It is more than stillness.  Rest calls to us.  We are asked to find rest but to find rest we must venture deeply into the invitation of Christ.  Rest requires everything.  Rest requires the paradox of our life: faith and fear; acceptance and rejection; selflessness and selfishness; ambition and mediocrity – all of us.  Rest is unbiased in its treatment of all.
    While rest calls to all and all who seek rest find it, finding it takes time.  Rest comes only as we surrender.  It will never come by force or demand nor can it be bought or sold.  It is not something to be won or conquered.  Rest comes as we trust and let go.  There are no short cuts or magic passageways to make it easier.  Rest only comes by answering Christ’s call to come and lay down which requires absolute surrender. 
    Rest in Christ.  He is the lover of your soul.  Your best interest is at his heart.  Trust his love for you.  If trust is the first step of rest then surrender is the second.  Be brave enough to surrender the false loves and the false self.  Be who you are.  Christ doesn’t love us in spite of who we are but because of who we are. 

Matthew 11:28-30

Henri Nouwen – The Way of the Heart
“Without solitude, we remain acolytes of our society and continue to be entangled in the illusions of the false self.”

Thomas Merton – The Ascent of Truth
“We look for rest and if we find it, it becomes intolerable.  Incapable of the divine activity which alone can satisfy [rest] … fallen man flings himself upon exterior things, not so much for their own sake as for the sake of agitation which keeps his spirit pleasantly numb … [the distraction] divers us aside from the one thing that can help us to begin our ascent to truth … the sense of our own emptiness.

This past weekend 21 people from Wichita came to Texas and we retreated together.  One challenge we all agreed on is that for the next 30 days we will spend at least 5 minutes with God.  We have to pick a special place and a special time and show up.  We don't have to do anything, say anything, write anything, or be anything.  We just have to show up to our God time.  We did kind of decide to journal about our God time but only when we were moved to.  Journaling is definitely not a requirement but we did all take a journal.

I decided that since I issued the challenge that maybe I should publicly share some of the things that are happening in my God time.  Perhaps it will serve as a guide to some of you who took the challenge.  Maybe it will remind you to show up to your God time.  You may feel like sharing some of your comments too.  Whatever sharing does is God's business.  I am just trying to obey.  So here goes.

March 22, 2009

There are dishes that need washing and clothes that need folding.  Now is not the time to worry about household tasks.  Now is the time to be with you, Jesus.  The time that I need to show up.  I probably shouldn't use so many words now but there is so much you have taught me this weekend.

Thursday afternoon we sat in a circle at Caddo Lake singing songs and sharing.  I asked for us to think about and articulate why we believe in God.  We would return to the question later that evening. While we were sharing, a bumble bee entered our circle.  He hovered and each time someone tried to shoo him he would move a bit but he remained with us.  Finally, he would turn toward a person and look then move on to another person.  This went on for a long while.  It was so strange.  What are you saying through that bee.  It was weird.

Thursday night You spoke to us so profoundly.  We had to ask ourselves - Do I truly believe in God?  Why? Is it because I have been taught to?  Is it because I was born in America and Christianity is the primary belief system?  Do I really believe in God?

We sat there thinking and allowing the question to pour over us like rain.  As we considered our belief in God, a more probing question began to surface - If we do believe in God, do we believe everything He says about us?  Meme read a verse from Zephaniah 3:17.  Do we really believe that God rejoices over us with singing?  Do we believe that we are the Beloved of God?  If we don't believe what God says about us, what does that make God?

We wondered if we were trying to "do" the God thing or just be God's.  We wondered what our motives were for the actions we did in Your Name.  Are we only what we do?  What if we don't do anything?  What if we don't do anything for You?  No great ministry, No great action, No great words - we are just Your children.  Everything in our society (secular and sacred) tells us we are what we do but we are not.  We are so much more.  We are Your Beloved.  We are the Apple of Your Eye.  We are what you created us to be.  All I ever have to be is what You made me.  

It hit us all pretty hard.  We had to be with You.  We didn't want to talk much.  It was all more than words could convey.

After a while, Dan and I began to talk about the day.  We talked about that Bee.  We both felt it was You trying to speak to us.  Maybe you were telling us to "BEE" aware: to look for You everywhere.  OK - I admit it sounds hokey but You do speak in the weirdest ways.  

At any rate, we decided to pay attention.  We want to hear You.  We want to rest in You.  We want to do Your will.  We want to be Your Beloved.  We want to be closer to You.  But we don't know how.  Help us Lord.  Have mercy on us.  

I love the simplicity of this prayer.

To shut the eyes of my soul,

I never realized how much I really love the rain.  Perhaps, it is the fact that I grew up in Maryland and during the winter months it could rain a good bit.  At any rate, it is raining now and I love it.  It hasn't rained as much in Texas this winter.