Scott Simpson: Big Ass Superstar

Site news: Site moving

2009-11-11T22:46:00.003-04:00

Heya, gang. A few newsy notes about the site.

- I'm working on a redesign of the site, and depending on how the folks at the ol' hosting company respond, you could see the site change over any day now. 'Til then, you can get a preview at http://bigasssuperstar.blogspot.com ... Once the required fixes are fixed, the regular bigasssuperstar.com addresses will take you right there.

- I've been doing some reading about internet advertising. I've also been studying the site statistics for this blog. I realize I haven't been writing a lot. So, in the coming weeks and months, watch for some writing which may not interest you directly, but should still be entertaining and better target the people who happen to be coming to this blog, which may lead to more advertising revenue for me. Am I trying to say that I'm becoming a search engine sell-out whore? No, not full-time. But I think I will throw up a few postings here and there to make the best use of what resources I have. Shake that big ass, as it were.

Spot the kitty [Flickr]

2009-11-11T14:00:42-08:00

BigAssSuperBlog posted a photo:

Can you find the kitty cat pretending to be a spindle of CDRs?

Our jackolanterns [Flickr]

2009-11-02T18:18:19-08:00

BigAssSuperBlog posted a photo:

We carved these up for Halloween 2009.

Our jackolanterns [Flickr]

2009-11-02T18:14:43-08:00

BigAssSuperBlog posted a photo:

We carved these up for Halloween 2009.

Our jackolanterns [Flickr]

2009-11-02T18:14:35-08:00

BigAssSuperBlog posted a photo:

We carved these up for Halloween 2009.

Our jackolanterns [Flickr]

2009-11-02T18:14:28-08:00

BigAssSuperBlog posted a photo:

We carved these up for Halloween 2009.

Videos from the wedding

2009-10-22T12:47:00.005-03:00

For those who can't wait for the DVD release, here are two of the videos from the 10-10-09 wedding reception.

First, the slideshow from before dessert. I'm really proud of how this turned out. Blow it up to full-screen and crank up the speakers.

Wedding Slideshow: Scott & Amanda 10-10-2009 from Scott Simpson on Vimeo.

Next, the video Amanda's sisters Ruth and Amy made for their speech:

I'm working on more video content for the DVD. Any guests who have pics or video from the wedding, send it on in, please! I've seen some of the photos people have posted on facebook and flickr, and they're fabulous!

Guess what? I got married!

2009-10-14T21:40:00.001-03:00

Posing for photos at the Saraguay dock., originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

Been wondering why I haven't been updating the blog for a while?

Well, I've been kinda busy ... planning a wedding.

On Saturday October 10, 2009 at the Royal Nova Scotia Yacht Squadron Saraguay House in Halifax, Amanda and I were married.

It was beautiful. It was magical. And it was a whole helluva lot of fun.

Many many many thanks from me and the new Mrs. Big Ass Superstar.

I'm a (replacement) winner!

2009-09-09T13:08:00.003-03:00

Many thanks to the guys at Inside Home Recording!

My name was drawn as a winner in their latest draw.

I've scored a copy of Audio Made Easy: (Or How to Be a Sound Engineer Without Really Trying).

Inside Home Recording is the longest-running podcast on home and project studio recording. I dig it.

Thanks, gentlemen, for the shout-out and the book. I'll be watching the mailbox!

Michael Jackson = Potato Chips

2009-09-01T13:00:00.001-03:00

A 1984 ad for Hostess Potato Chips in Canada. A not-so-subtle Michael Jackson circa Thriller rip-off.

Evolution of a joke

2009-08-31T20:30:00.003-03:00

It seems like there's a new joke at work every day. Something's funny for the moment, and very funny. Once it a while it carries over into long-term hilarity. Today's funniness came around like this.

My co-host remarked that the afternoon needed a drum solo. So, I did a big air drum fill from "In The Air Tonight" by Phil Collins. Funny. Funnier when I did it three times.

I was reminded of the new site from the folks at You Look Nice Today: songparts.biz, where you can buy just the best parts of the songs. Good laughs there, with some of the best bits, including the Collins riff.

Then the room erupted from a small bit of David Lee Roth from "Running With The Devil". I followed the link to an MP3 of Diamond Dave's isolated vocal from the track. The boss walked in and wondered why were laughing so hard, and shouldn't we be working?

That's when the humour went from consumption to transformation.

I took the Dave MP3, sliced and diced it and delivered All The Best Parts from the DLR vocal track. Give it a listen and try not to laugh.

Someone put two and two together and figured out that David Lee Roth sounds like the Screaming Goat from YouTube.

So, Jenn put together this duet of David Lee Roth and the Screaming Goat.

All that was left to do was put the Roth/Goat duo to music. I found an instrumental track and threw something together. I present to you David Lee Roth and The Screaming Goat performing Running With The Devil.

And that's where the joke was left today. What'll be funny tomorrow?

---

Links:

david%20lee%20roth-running%20with%20the%20devil-vocals-only%20the%20best%20parts.mp3

david%20lee%20roth%20vs%20screaming%20goat.mp3

running%20with%20the%20devil%20-%20david%20lee%20roth%20and%20screamiing%20goat%20-%20bigasssuperstar.mp3

Backyard squirrel gives me attitude

2009-08-15T13:23:00.001-03:00

Backyard squirrel gives me attitude, originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

Giant grasshopper

2009-08-15T13:22:00.001-03:00

Giant grasshopper, originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

We've seen all kinds of wildlife and insects around the house, but this is the first time we've seen a grasshopper. And Amanda says it was huge!

Corner Gas - Participaction

2009-08-12T13:37:00.001-03:00

Particpaction is on tour across Canada, looking for ways to get fat kids out of the basement ... so I went on to YouTube looking for the old 1983-era "Do It" Participaction PSAs to share with the youngsters at work.

And look what I found -- a clip from Corner Gas that not only spoofs the Participaction ads, but the Canada Fitness Test. The government-sponsored annual test that gave the rest of the class another reason to feel superior to the fat kids. Do they still do this test in schools? And is the FAIL rate higher now that fat kids are approaching majority status?

Happy 36th birthday to me. W00t. I'm older than I've ever been ... and now I'm even older .... and now I'm even older .... and now I'm older still.

For those who google instead of going directly

2009-08-03T16:51:00.001-03:00

If you landed here, you're probably looking for scottandamanda.ca. Well, here's the second-fastest way of getting there: click this link for www.scottandamanda.ca!

The yum-yum fun that's cool and keen

2009-08-01T11:50:00.003-03:00

And it's name is the Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine.

I've been scanning piles of photos lately, with a vision of putting together a slideshow video for the wedding. I happened upon one shot of me with friend-at-the-time Justin Porter in the kitchen. In the background is not only an old-school Pepsi can -- back when they were 280mL -- but there's a much-wanted toy there. The Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine. Click to enlarge.

A day or two later, I was browsing one of the Cheezburger family of web sites ... something about Nostalgic Wins ... and stumbled upon the commercial for said Sno-Cone Machine! W00t! I had part of the melody still in my memory over the years. Now I can't get the jingle out of my head.

Enjoy.

Now, before you go scouring e-bay for one, here's a slight warning. The toy was not all it was cracked/shaved up to be. If you look carefully, you'll see the kid operating the toy can barely hold it down on the table. It takes tremendous force to push the ice cubes down onto the shaving barrel, and simultaneous tremendous rotational force to crank the plastic handle to shave the ice. Meantime, you need to use the plastic shovel to remove the shaved ice from the barrel. All in all, it can be a blister-inducing experience that's out of proportion to the Yum-Yum Fun you achieve at the end.

Having said that, I'm eternally grateful to my parents for granting my wish (answering my persistent demands?) for the Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine. After seeing that ad, can ya blame me?

Naughty backyard squirrel

2009-07-30T22:48:00.001-03:00

Naughty backyard squirrel, originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

Nomming on another bird feeder -- with only one foot holding on to the tree! Terribly amusing stuff.

Blogging from the deck

2009-07-25T16:07:00.002-03:00

Well, we're getting some sun ... finally. It's been a soggy summer here in Nova Scotia, and I'm grateful for the nice weather when we get some.

I'm on the back deck checking out the wireless connection on my new toy -- an Asus Eee PC netbook. It's the 1000HE. I won't go into the details of how I came to acquire it, but I'm digging it so far.

It's like a notebook PC but smaller. It has a ten-inch screen, runs Windows XP Home on an Atom 280 processor, and comes with a 160GB hard drive. I upped the RAM to 2GB.

I haven't done much on it yet, other than run a ton of driver upgrades and add a bunch of software -- Google Earth, OpenOffice, Ccleaner, Avast! antivirus, etc. But it seems really sharp. I could be mistaken, but I think this might be one of the most powerful computers in the house.

Also out back, I'm seeing a lot more wireless networks than my router inside is able to see. There's probably ten access points showing up on the survey. A few are unsecured. I upgraded my router's firmware to DD-WRT, so I was able to boost the transmitting power of the access point in the basement. Now I have a clean signal and I can blog, watch videos, read e-books or do whatever from the comfort of the back deck ... in the breeze ... where it's actually getting cloudy ... and a little cold. Brr.

Naughty backyard squirrel

2009-07-21T11:47:00.001-03:00

Naughty backyard squirrel, originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

Another backyard critter getting into mischief. This squirrel spent several hours last afternoon and evening nomming on the suet puck bird feeder in the backyard. More pictures at Bigass Photos.

Dahlia

2009-07-21T11:45:00.001-03:00

Dahlia, originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

Amanda's new favourite plant -- this striking dahlia on the back deck.

ANDREW KRYSTAL 95.7 Tribute

2009-07-13T14:25:00.001-03:00

Aside from this gentleman's tragic misuse of apostrophes, I think it's cool that a listener made a song/video about someone at my station.

More funny blogs to make you laugh out loud

2009-06-29T13:48:00.004-03:00

The web has never been funnier.

Here are some sites that have made me laugh so hard recently, I thought I'd need medical assistance:

- You Suck at Kijiji - mocking the stupidity of people posting to the free classifieds web site that's popular in Canada
- You Suck at Craigslist - same idea, but for Craigslist

- F My Life - sometimes life just fs you in the a
- My Life is Average - same premise, but for banal things

- Awkward Family Photos - like it says
- F U Penguin - cute animals are more than they appear to be
- Passive Aggressive Notes - if you could please visit these web sites, it'd be appreciated. thanks.

I'm especially fond of the first one. But they're all hilarious.

Roof's on, holes dug, deadlines creep

2009-06-29T13:16:00.002-03:00

Didn't take long for Bernie and his Coughlin crew to put the new roof on the place. A lot of noise and flying nails, and one instance of me catching one worker peeing on the side of the house, but otherwise, an incident-free installation. And, the sun came out later in the day.

The front and back yards continue to be a wonderland of life forms. The front lawn is a diverse blend of clover, creeping charlie, dandelions, little purple flowers, chinchbug-eaten lawn, and some grass in there too. Amanda's on a gardening tear, so we spent Saturday digging two circles in the front lawn to make homes for more plants. Within the dirt was a few hundred ants, several white grubs, possible chinchbugs, spiders, beetles, and stuff I'm probably blocking from memory because they were so creepy.

Birds love our place almost as much as we do. They've been coming by less in the rain -- which has lasted for what seems like weeks now -- but we've seen robins, blue jays, little black squawky birds, big black birds, at least one kind of woodpecker, and a hummingbird or two. Really cool stuff.

We're starting to crack down on getting-stuff-done on the wedding front. Small victories here and there, but I acknowledge that we may be behind in such areas as letting people know what they can do to help, and what their roles encompass. Ack! I'll be in touch soon, I hope!

Joys of home ownership, up and down

2009-06-25T07:42:00.004-03:00

Well, *this* has been an interesting few hours.

Last night while we were waiting for dinner, we heard some kind of bang. I went to the basement hall and saw the cats near the litterbox looking perplexed. I thought they were fighting or something. Then I heard a hissing noise.

I scurried under the stairwell and saw a spray coming from the main water line. Uh-oh! A leak!

I had Amanda grab a bucket and some towels while I shut off the line ahead of the meter.

A call to the city's emergency number summoned a repairman about an hour later. He arrived ... leaving a trail of blood down the stairs. Yeah, apparently he'd cut himself on an earlier call and the dirty bandage just wasn't keeping the crimson nectar inside his body.

Anyway, he muttered something about the packing in the valve being bad or something. And something about washers being made of leather. In the end, he fixed it.

So, crisis solved.

Then ... about 15 minutes ago ... that'd be about 7:30 ... we were awaked by the doorbell.

It was Bernie! Bernie! Bernie from Coughlan's Roofing! Yeah, Bernie from Coughlan's Roofing here to do the roof! Bernie who was supposed to call on Monday! Or Tuesday! Or even yesterday to say he'd be coming by today to replace our roof.

No problem that it's raining today. "It's not going to rain!" says the young man on our roof, tearing off shingles with roofing nails flying around. "We haven't worked all week, so it's not going to rain on us today!"

At present, the house is shaking like God is cleaning his shoes on our eaves. The cats are either intrigued, alarmed or bored.

I must learn how to ambush people in their sleep as a tactic to profit and succeed in life.

I am so dearly looking forward to sleeping in on Saturday morning.

Naughty backyard raccoon

2009-06-18T00:45:00.001-03:00

Naughty backyard raccoon, originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

One of a series of pictures snapped past midnight last night as I looked off the back deck and saw a raccoon causing mischief in our backyard.

First, it reached up and started tugging at the yellow extension cord that runs from the deck to the shed. Then it walked over to the clothesline and pulled down a big blue fleece blanket ... and either planned to heist it, or make it a meal.

I hustled down the stairs to ask its name, but it scurried off into the neighbour's yard.

My kitty seemed intrigued by the smell of the blanket when I brought it inside. I hope it didn't smell like rabies.

A two-legged return to normalcy: general update

2009-06-15T13:12:00.003-03:00

Looks like Amanda's leg malfunction wasn't as serious as first diagnosed. The orthopedic hottie doctor at the Cobequid Health Centre squeezed and flexed her on Friday and told her to scram and resume living. She's not at full speed yet, but she's clear to return to baseball and other fun-ness as much as the pain allows.

I was freakin' out thinking that this past weekend contained Father's Day, and that I'd missed yet another card-sending deadline. But on Saturday we figured out, courtesy of the interwebs, that Father's Day is this coming Sunday. So, if all goes well, I will have sent a card on time...for a change.

Yard work is a blessing and a curse. I can't say that I enjoy mowing the lawn, but I like how it looks afterward. I've taken a few passes at the evil evil goutweed with the weed whacker, and I've enjoyed decimating the greenspace. It was a bloodbath. Imagine throwing a grocer's supply of celery into an open blender, and you get the idea. Goutweed guts were spraying all around, into my glasses, onto my face, onto my clothes. Damned crap keeps growing back. But I have a plan. Mwahaha.

Last week's election coverage went surprisingly smoothly. In years gone by, I've been assigned to report from the headquarters of assorted fringe/weirdo/longshot candidates for comic relief, or from legit but underdog candidates for boo-hoo updates. It was nice to be at the winner's party for a change. And the results (a sweeping majority win for the first NDP government east of Ontario) came in so quickly that I was outta there at a reasonable hour. I did not sample the open bar.

My net worth chart over at networthiq has been updated. Up 5% in the past month. Good showing.

I cashed out some stock and maxed out my RRSP. And I rebalanced, or more accurately, began balancing and diversifying my RRSP. Perhaps I'll write a post about this another time, but instead of having all my loot in two equity mutual funds -- one of which wasn't moving at all -- I spread it out across money market, bond index, and a variety of equity funds. Oughta be interesting.

Another shout-out to my sister's growing family. Two kids now, and they're buying a new house. Excitement!

Wedding planning continues to crawl along. We now have the venue, the cake-maker, an officiant, a photographer, a florist, and probably more. October 10 is the day -- don't forget. I must get on top of the what-people-are-assigned-to-do list.

My recent at-home project has been building bass traps and broadband sound absorbers for my home studio. I hope to get the last of them up on the wall soon, then do a showcase post about 'em. I think they're cool, and the room seems to sound better.

The folks at work surprised me last week. It was the 15th anniversary of my first paid shift with the company. Fifteen years! In my business, that's a long time to be at one company. There was cake ... I got a free shirt ... folks signed a card ... a certificate from the new CEO ... and a generous gift card for the Blue Jays, cable/wireless/internet or the Shopping Channel. Sweet.

That's the roundup for now. Keep at 'er.

80s Commercials - McDLT [Jason Alexander]

2009-06-15T13:01:00.001-03:00

If this had had bacon.... you'd want it.

Hobbling toward the end of a busy stretch

2009-06-09T12:43:00.002-03:00

Friends and family on Facebook (the place what I ain't at) are, I'm sure, already up to speed on this, but for the rest, the big news this week is that my fiancee Amanda is at home with no mobility while I'm here at work.

We had a busy weekend of gardening and lawn care. Monday I was up early for an appointment, then had a frustrating day at work. Around 10 o'clock, Amanda went up to get a snack and I considered briefing myself on my work assignment for Tuesday and test-driving some new technology for work.

Then, a crash, a smack, and a scream, and Amanda was in a pile at the bottom of the basement stairs.

Looks like she missed a step coming down when she was a few steps up from the bottom. She came straight down her right leg, and says she felt something give. Her leg buckled and she flopped to the floor in pain.

She refused to go to hospital by ambulance, citing cost. So, wincing in pain, we gathered up a few essentials and crawled to the car. It took, what, 20 minutes to drive into town to the ER, with every bump and pothole causing more pain.

Triage at the ER sent us to a waiting room around 11pm. Then she was moved to the plaster-spattered room where they make casts -- improvised as a waiting room. I stayed until around 1:30am, having not seen a doctor, then drove home to get some rest.

Around 4:20am, the doorbell woke me up. Amanda had arrived home in a taxi, but didn't have enough money on hand to pay the fare. I dug up some money out of the spare cash jar and sent the nice cabbie on his way.

Turns out the doctor's preliminary diagnosis is that she suffered a partial tear to her quadriceps and MCL. She's been put in some kind of flexible cast/bandage and needs crutches. This will temporarily derail her new hobbies of gardening and baseball, and effectively keeps her housebound, since she can't drive.

That was a long day for both of us ... and another one today. Amanda has a friend coming over to visit, and hopefully help ... and I can't be there because it's election day in Nova Scotia, and I'm pulling a double shift. I'll be in Dartmouth tonight to cover the NDP campaign, and this'll be a big one, since pollsters and pundits are forecasting a possible NDP win -- the first NDP government ever formed east of Ontario. So, it's going to be a late night, and my poor dear is home by herself with a bum leg.

The weekend can't some soon enough, gang!

Introducing Nephew 2.0!

2009-05-29T12:25:00.002-03:00

Congratulations to my little sister and her husband on the arrival of their new son Callum!

Clothes: hang 'em high!

2009-05-24T20:16:00.001-03:00

Backyard clothesline is a go, originally uploaded by BigAssSuperBlog.

We're now cool like the rest of the kids on the block by adding a clothesline to the backyard. Energy savings, here we come! The clothesline stuff came in a kit, which came out cheaper than buying the pulleys, cable, hooks, winch and spacer separately. Then again, the ladder was, what, $149, but we needed one anyway. And it was half-price at Canadian Tire. Seriously, it's a badass ladder!