Big Slice of Life, Small Slice of Cheesecake

I Did It My Way

2007-09-07T09:40:46-07:00

Since May of 2006, I've been blathering on about trying to lose weight by eating a sensible diet and exercising. I've really enjoyed writing about my journey - all the wonderful comments and your own wonderful blogs have made this a huge pleasure.

As I've mentioned a few times, I've recently returned to work full-time, and I've found in nearly impossible to remember to eat, let alone spend the time needed to actually write thoughtful posts here. I am still plugging away at exercising and eating well - but I need to devote my hours to actually doing it, instead of talking about it.

I'll admit, it is hard to leave - I wanted to be a triumphant weight loss success story, and be an inspiration to others, instead of just another mom who struggles to do the right things. But as I've come to know you guys, it has become clear that you're not reading Big Slice because you expect me to be somehow different and better - you're reading because you can relate.

GROUP HUG!

I'll still be keepin' it real over at my parenting blog - Three Kid Circus, and will be popping up from time to time at Mommybloggers. You can also read me twice a week at BlogHer.org, where I'm serving up movie reviews and entertainment commentary.

Being a ClubMom Blogger has been a fantastic experience. I'll be reading your blogs, and cheering from the sidelines.

Take care, and thank you for reading!

Love,

Jenny

Eating Like A College Student

2007-08-28T16:21:43-07:00

The letter we received home from school on the first day should have read:

Welcome back to school, Lauck family! In less than a week, all three kids will be sick, and you'll be cleaning up vomit and living on cup-o-noodles and saltines and flat ginger ale. And bananas.

You will be mean, but that isn't because your kids have a bunch of homework every night, already. No, it is because you're a bad mother. Don't even think about passing that off on us.

Love,

The school.

Ah yes, the chaos continues here at Casa Lauck. I've got nothing worth eating, I've been sporadic on the working out, and my kids and I have a tenuous relationship that includes a lot of snarling. Back to school is awesome, yeah?

I can't believe we've already had vomit. That has to be some kind of record, does it not?

I'm off to the grocery store this evening, so it is menu time once again. I honestly don't know why I bother sometimes, because it feels like it is courting disaster to be prepared. This is some sort of warped lifelong resident of earthquake country logic. If we don't prepare for a disaster, one won't happen. But the second we put aside a new medical kit and enough food and water for the family, we'll get the big one.

In your face, bad logic! I'm making a menu, and it ain't pretty, but whomp. In the extended entry.

Tuesday: Pancakes and sausages , sliced apples
Wednesday: Rice with curried veggies and some sort of protein-rich dessert. Like custard.
Thursday: Oven-fried chicken drummettes with pasta salad and sweet potato fries
Friday: Bacon and cheddar cheese quiche with broccoli
Saturday: Take out - probably chinese
Sunday: Turkey roast with mashed potatoes, gravy and string beans
Monday: Lasagne

Who has time for thinking about food?

2007-08-22T11:34:30-07:00

It seems to be a rather cruel joke - I post my best intentions here, and this is where they stay...in digital form. I've recently gone back to work almost full time, and juggling the responsibilities of my family, my new job, all my writing gigs and more has left me rather at a loss when it comes to meal time. I haven't been able to slow down long enough to grocery shop, let alone lovingly prepare a meal.

It is getting dire around here.

I've needed to do big grocery shopping for a week, and instead we keep slapping a bandage on the situation with a gallon of milk here, a loaf of bread there. I figure I'll adjust to this pace (not that I was exactly adept at the previous pace, hah!) but for the meantime, I'm going to be having to force hours out of my day in order to get some order in my pantry and fridge.

RIght about now, I really need to re-read The Fat Fallacy. That idea that I can enjoy a leisurely family meal with my husband and children seems like a far-fetched fantasy... only because I'm allowing myself to not be strict with my work schedule. Is is possible to have your cheesecake and eat it too?

I'm determined to find out.

So! First things first - a menu. Then shopping. Then some prepare ahead tactics.

The menu for the next week in in the extended entry. I can do this.

8/22 - Soup and sandwiches, sliced apples
8/23 - Pasta salad and grilled turkey sausages
8/24 - Tilapia, sweet potato fries and applesauce
8/25 - Homemade mac and cheese, steamed broccoli
8/26 - Soft tacos made with black beans, red bell pepper, rice, avocado, corn and cilantro, with salad
8/27 - Chicken and noodle casserole with green beans

Back To School

2007-08-15T21:23:38-07:00

Despite advance planning, and a whole lineup of things ready to go this morning, I woke up late (thanks to the husband) and found myself rushing out the door, not for a pleasant walk, but for the three minute drive to school.

I can't tell you how ridiculous it feels to drive a mile to the school, when the walk from home takes almost the same amount of time, once you factor in parking, unloading and all that jazz. It is so silly.

But rather than risk it this morning, we drove, and made it to the new classrooms just as the bell rang.

The lunches I packed went over well, finger sandwiches and a few cookies, apples and cheese and crackers. Not the most nutritious of lunches, but I figure we'll work up to salads and other veggie intensive fare.

I'm really, really struggling right now to get back into my exercise groove. I need to challenge myself again, I think. I should really pick a daily hour and stick with it. Unfortunately, I haven't found that magic hour - and that kind of thinking keeps me from just fitting it in as best as I can during the day.

Tonight, I'm shot. Absolutely spent, both mentally and physically. Probably from all the Riverdancing I was doing to celebrate the start of school. But I'm going to set my alarm for 5:15 am tomorrow, so I can squeeze in my DVD workout before the kids wake up. That will start my day off right.

But you know what? Even if I don't, I'm not going to bed tomorrow until I've managed to work up a sweat. I need it, for the endorphins, for the routine, for the positive impact on my day.

You probably need it to. What are you doing for exercise these days?

T Minus One Day

2007-08-13T17:09:35-07:00

With the kids starting school on Wednesday, I've entered the final countdown. Backpacks? Check. Lunch boxes? Check. New shoes? Check. New outfit for the first day? Check.

All the rest of it? Laller laller laller laller laller laller laller laller laller laller. Commence running and circles and flapping because the school year is upon us.

There are so many things I have planned for the hours while the two big kids are in school, and most of them are likely to be thwarted, but I've got the buzz of anticipation and it feels good.

Because I'm working nearly full-time right now, I'm not very organized when it comes to eating. But with the kids in school, that isn't going to be an option. I can't very well send them to school with four green olives and a frozen chicken breast, so I'm going to have to menu up for the weeks ahead. I'm pretty excited about that, too, actually.

Tonight after the kids go to bed, I'm going to be drawing up my official menu for the month, and then I'll tackle shopping for all the goodies tomorrow. My big plan is to pack not only the school-kids' lunches, but to go ahead and pack mine and my youngest's too, and maybe even the hubs, so that we all have healthy, nutritious food to get us through the day. Or, you know, some olives and frozen chicken.

Also on the agenda for this evening is re-upping on my daily exercise commitment. I've been flailing around, squeezing in a workout here and there, but as my working hours increase, I'm spending more time on my hiney than ever before, and it is making me more tired, more grumpy and I actually have been having trouble sleeping - all problems that disappeared with a daily hour of sweaty exercise.

I'm giving you all a pass tomorrow to get yourselves organized. But starting August 15th, I'm on the ball and going at it full speed. I'd love to have some company to keep me accountable and motivated.

At this point, I'm not concerned with counting calories or losing pounds. I just want to see myself back on a healthy routine with daily exercise and regular meals. (How low I'm aiming, huh?)

Menus and exercise schedule coming tomorrow.

Packed Lunches Are Back On The Horizon

2007-08-09T18:23:21-07:00

Meal planning has been the bane of my existence for the last month, and so I haven't been doing it. As a result, we've been eating unbalanced, strange meals. Mostly things that I don't have to cook.

I figure a few strange weeks of eating aren't the worst thing I've subjected my family to. But with school starting in one week, I've got a good dose of panic going, and I'm not ready to deal.

I'm not ready! Whose idea was this whole back to school in the middle of August? WHO?

I came up with some great suggestions for packables last year... but recently, I've been really inspired by a few fellow bloggers:

Lunch in a Box - this is right up my alley - I love the presentation and the smaller portions.

Pack My Lunch - she's been on a slower posting schedule this summer, but she's got some fantastic ideas for even the picky kids.

The title of this blog just cracks me up, and she's got some fantastic stuff here, too.

I'm determined to pack lunches for the kids this year - last year, I made it through two discouraging weeks of nearly-full lunch boxes being brought home (and the news that my kids were mooching off of their friends who had pringles and "fruit" snacks) before I decided to purchase hot lunches for my kids - I figured it would be better to have the school food get rejected, so I could still pretend that I'm a good cook.

This year, I'm not going to be defeated! (Or okay, not that easily!) My kids aren't sandwich eaters... so I'm thinking leftovers are going to be the way to go.

How about at your house? Are you ready for school lunches?

The Sin of Omission

2007-08-05T23:08:36-07:00

I've been working on a mega-post in my head, all about BlogHer and the lessons I learned listening to the panelists and awesome audience members during the Our Bodies, Our Blogs panel, when I realized that maybe a week of wondering where to start is enough, and I can just leap back in over here with the first thing that comes to mind.

Only the best for my BigSlicers, yeah?

It came up during our discussion that some of us tend to be honest and open about our successes, but we gloss over those times when we aren't succeeding. After my great run of daily exercise, I've fallen out of the groove, and am fighting to regain my daily "walk-break." I've managed most of the days, but I've been angry at myself for not finding the time on the days where I've been so busy with other things that I never managed to get dressed all the way, or eat a hot meal, let alone read to my children or be present with them in the way that they need.

I've been reluctant to write these things. I want to tell you all that I'll find a way to get my workout in, no matter how busy I become, and I want to say that I'm eating well, sleeping enough, drinking my water and above all, losing weight -

And none of these things are true. Not this week.

I look at all the photos that have appeared online from BlogHer, and I see myself smiling and laughing, and it heals that little disappointment in my heart that I didn't manage to lose the weight this last year. I heard my story from the lips of so many other women at BlogHer. We all want to look our best - and what I'm really starting to understand is that maybe my best can't be measured in pounds or inches. Maybe my best is something that comes from a place inside me, something that lights up my face when I'm talking to a friend. Maybe I'm at my best when I'm surrounded by laughter and friends and women who unapologetically eat an extra helping of bacon, and throw caution and calorie counting to the wind when there's a dessert buffet.

It isn't that I'm advocating over-indulgence, or saying that bacon equals happiness, but sometimes, it just feels good to inhabit your own body, to look through your own eyes at others without turning your focus inward. And yeah, my body still could shed some pounds, both for my health and physical comfort, as well as for my vanity. Lord knows, if I could have talked these pounds off, they would be long gone.

For now, I'm going to reclaim that hour of exercise that has become so restful and good for my mental health. Onward.

On the Road Again

2007-07-25T06:30:33-07:00

I'm taking this show on the road - BigSlice is BlogHer bound! I'll be updating from the conference... if you're at BlogHer this year, give me a shout!

Busy Makes For Odd Choices, It Seems

2007-07-19T19:15:34-07:00

I've been very busy this month...busy to the point where grocery shopping is not happening on a frequent basis. I've neglected my meal planning, and really, I've thrown the calorie awareness to the wind. I've been getting all judge-y and feeling guilty, when I dawned on me that despite my utter lack of a master plan, I've been sticking with fairly healthy choices, and I'm okay.

I'm just fine. You know who isn't fine with all this busyness? The kids. They are sick of me working, sick of the back of my head and the tap-tap-tapping of the keyboard. We've been cutting out of here for a few hours each day, swimming at the pool, playing in the park, seeing a movie or just doing errands, but we've been At Home for much of this month. This isn't exactly how I pictured summer, but then again - I don't recall my parents planning fun-filled days of adult-led exploration and adventure. No, they put us in swimsuits and terrycloth shorts-sets and sent us out into the backyard. Or sent us to the pool with a pack of our friends. We rode our bikes and made up clubs and spent the summer with our siblings and our peers.

These kids of mine are outside digging in the dirt as I speak, pretending to be archeologists digging up artifacts from long ago. They are filthy. I am biting back the urge to hose them down just yet - they are having fun, and I'm getting some much needed time to blog.

As I get ready for this weekend's Wii party (more on that next week) and next week's trip to BlogHer, I glance at the calendar and realize that summer is almost gone. The kids are back in school in less than a month. Why are the days slipping by so fast?

It is funny...every day while I do my DVD workout, I know it so well that I don't have to listen much anymore. My brain wanders, and I find myself laughing about an earlier conversation, going over my list of tasks still undone, planning dinner. As the sweat starts to drip down my back, I lose myself in the motion, and it becomes a meditation. I've been very active, many times in my life, but I cannot ever recall finding it a peaceful experience, until now.

Even with the peppy music, and the speed of my limbs, I become very introspective as I plow through the workout. It has become MY time. An hour a day where I can get my heart-rate pumping, yes - but more than that, it is a time when the busyness stops. It releases stress, and I feel fantastic when I hit the eject button at the end. I've started to look forward to that hour, and I find that I will make the time, even when there are more pressing issues at hand. What a trip, huh?

Even the kids respect "The Hour." They will pop in and out, joining in for a few bursts of walking or quietly watching from the couch. They know that once I get going, I'm going to be nicer, more patient, and generally happier. It has made a huge difference for all of us.

I wish I could say that I've been as affected by the desire to eat healthy foods. I'm not. I still crave things that I'm not supposed to crave, and eat portions larger than strictly necessary. All in good time.

All in good time.

Tuesday Already

2007-07-17T06:48:07-07:00

Why, hello! The week is underway! (Note to self: post on Mondays. Doh!)

It is a very bright and sunny 6:30 in the morning here at Big Slice headquarters, and I'm feeling great. This is rather remarkable, because I pulled out my scale for the first time in about a month and hopped on it yesterday. More on that in a minute.

My most recent 10-day challenge - daily stepped up exercise plus journaling was a 50% success. Me and journaling, we just don't get along. Me and the stepped up daily exercise, however - whoooo! I'm absolutely loving how my body responds to the daily exercise, and I've found myself contemplating how to build up the intensity and push myself more.

Me! Pushing myself! More?

"Who are you, and what have you done with ~~Hermione Granger~~ Jenny Lauck?"

With BlogHer a mere 10 days away, I've been noticing a lot of posts around the internet of women who are trying to lose a few pounds (or, you know, 30) before BlogHer. I suspect there are a lot of crash diets, frantic exercise, and probably the purchase of a bunch of Spanx. That was me last year. Blown diet, an 11th hour attempt to sweat off a few pounds, and the futile attempt to encase myself in spandex, resulting in a sausage-like appearance.

This year, I'm proud of the progress I've made. I went shopping this weekend, and picked up a couple of new dresses and tops, and discovered that I've lost a dress size since I scored the dress I wore to my friend's wedding. It's a small victory, but a visible one.

Which is why when I stepped on the scale yesterday and saw 172 blinking at me, I couldn't care less. It is muscle, baby. ALL MUSCLE. My waist is trimmer, my arms are thinner, my legs more shapely.

How did you guys do? Did you stick with the challenge?