Big Whack: Science & Mystery & Religion

Big Spiders: Joro Spider Scares Scaredy Cats

2024-06-05T19:19:00.000-07:00

The big harmless spider, the Joro spider, famously in Georgia and working its way around the South, continues to freak out people who like being freaked out. It's a harmless spider, like I said, But some people go out of their way to be afraid of things they don't understand. They banned books they don't read, dislike people they don't know, and are afraid of anything bigger than their pinky.

It might be that they don't know that the Black Widow is a very very small spider.

There's this guy, and we know him personally, trying to counter all this nonsense. He knows his stuff on mean he's trying to get other people on board. There's a lot of wacky people out there, but he's not one of them. Those people are afraid of a big spider instead of a small spider.

Whack!

Jumping from a Plane at 104

2023-10-25T09:13:00.000-07:00

It's a mixed up world. Up and down are one of the few things we understand. Or not. Can we even count on gravity?

Dorothy Hoffner of Ottawa, Illinois was counting on gravity when she jumped from a plane. If it didn't work, her age would be the least interesting part of the story. It did work, so here we are. She was 104. That's news. She was hoping to crush the record owned by Linnéa Ingegärd Larsson of Sweden. Dear Linnéa was a mere 103 for her record.

Unfortunately, the upbeat and enthusiastic jumper has been lifted into Heaven only a week after the big step. That's 100% unrelated to her now famous parachute jump.

A 104-year-old woman dies before Guinness can confirm her record as oldest skydiver

I don't know how hard it for the Guinness people to verify such things. Either she jumped or she didn't. And, as it relates to her age, a quick peak at her driver's license will clear that up. Though, frankly, we suspect she's not driven in a a few years.

Live in the Chicago area and want to jump? See https://skydivechicago.com/

If you want to leap into the unknown, we've got you covered there as well.

https://leapintotheunknown.com/

Whatever you do, look before you leap.

Whack!

Joro Spiders from Mars?

2022-03-05T16:09:00.003-08:00

The itsy bitsy spider is not itsy nor bitsy. The Joro spider is large, colorful, and taking over America.

It started in a small town in northern Georgia after piggybacking on a shipping container from Japan. It slowly grew its presence until seeing a major population spike in 2020. In 2021, it covered north Georgia and found its way into the Carolinas. Now, it is establishing itself across the East Coast and entire South.

Here are some silly joro spider jokes for you.

Whack!

Fame, Fortune, and Learning English

2022-02-28T11:47:00.001-08:00

Looking to find fame and fortune? You're on your own. If you are looking to learn to speak English better, take a look:

https://englishconversationtable.com/

Whack!

Writing, Speeches, and Literature

2018-09-17T06:54:00.001-07:00

There's so much going on for good writers these days. Speech writing, literature tutoring, writing tips.

The beat goes on.

LiteratureTutor.com

AmericanSpeechwriter.com

Speechwriter101.com

Whack!

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This is a shameless ad to promote my services.

Bristol Palin and a Quarter Million Dollars

2011-04-06T05:26:00.001-07:00

Everyone knows Planned Parenthood national leaders makes a fortune. And everyone knows those working the local crisis pregnancy center makes squat.

Not Bristol Palin. She's clearing over a quarter million dollars. Mind you, her mission is good. She is saying, in essence, "I understand the hardship of having a baby as a young, single mom. That hardship is not solved by killing the child before she's born, but not having sex as a teenager will help too." She's been there and knows, especially with Levi the Daddy leaving her in the lurch.

But $262,000?

Sure, she needs income, and she's famous and can draw legitimate attention to a difficult issue. But that much?

Whack!
Bristol Palin earns $262K for teen pregnancy work

Man gets prison for NY self-help speaker's death

2011-04-05T21:34:00.001-07:00

You have a guy who kills another guy for the insurance. The only thing is, the dead wanted to be killed.

The Joel Osteen lookalike was only scamming readers with books and presentations on stress. Obviously, he was a liar. He had no idea, so he paid a guy to off him. And that guy, the murderer, gets 20 years in the clink.

Whack!
Man gets prison for NY self-help speaker's death

Charlie Sheen's Mystery

2011-03-09T21:57:00.000-08:00

Here is mystery for you: His name is Charlie Sheen. The world cannot decide if he is winning or not, but he is drawing attention. Strange things. Music videos in which he might, or might not be singing. Comparisons to Chuck Norris (come on, don't mess with Chuck). It goes on.

Songify This: Winning - a Song by Charlie Sheen
Chuck Norris vs Charlie Sheen
Let's Learn About Charlie Sheen's Early Life

Is Charlie winning, or are we losing? The video music guy is winning, that's for sure.

Whack!

Black Friday: A Brighter Day

2010-11-26T11:29:00.000-08:00

The word already is that Black Friday sales are hot, and, being a capitalist pig, I want to ride that coattail. Below are ads for places I do business with. Click and buy, click and buy.

Black Friday is here. Black Monday is coming.

Pope Knocked Down By Serial Knocker Downer

2009-12-25T07:36:00.000-08:00

Pope Knocked Down By Serial Knocker Downer

She struggles with mental illness, so I hope they do not come down too hard on her. Pope Benedict XVI was arriving at St. Peter’s Basilica for Christmas Eve mass when it happened. The Pope is OK, but French Cardinal Roger Etchegaray apparently broke his hip.

Oral Roberts is Dead

2009-12-18T15:35:00.000-08:00

Televangelist Oral Roberts is dead. You knew that.

He was 91.

More in Google news.

Tony Alamo Guilty of Taking Girls as Young as 9 Across State Lines for Sex

2009-07-29T14:29:00.000-07:00

Tony Alamo, previously known a Bernie Lazar Hoffman is a heap of trouble. Basically, he was found guilty of being an A No. 1 Creep.

There will be some boneheads who look at all of this and blame God for this, but God's not the one at fault here. There's no spin Alamo can put on it, but he still is telling people he's a prophet and being jailed for the gospel.

Hogwash, Tony.

Is there hope? Sure there is, but that will take Alamo actually responding to the real Gospel.

Whack!

Convicted Pastor Says He's 'One of the Prophets'
Pastor convicted of sex abuse says he's 'another one of the prophets that went to jail'

Prosecutors said Alamo could face a total of 175 years in prison over violating the nearly century-old Mann Act, a morality law once aimed at stopping women from being sold into prostitution. Each count also carries possible fines of $250,000.

Late-term Abortionist Gunned Down in Cold Blood

2009-05-31T10:34:00.000-07:00

While no one thinks of an abortionist as men of integrity, say, like a casino operator or government official, but none should be gunned down. This was done inside a church, but there's no news yet whether either late-term abortion specialist George Tiller or his killer believed in God.

There's a smaller group of Americans that support baby killing through the day before birth, but George Tiller, the man murdered by apparently someone who is prolife (no point in demonstrating the obvious irony) was only doing what the law allows. Besides, President Barack Obama supports abortion.

Whack!
Abortion Doctor Shot to Death in Church

Tragedy of Faith? Maryland mom pleads guilty in cult starvation death

2009-03-30T18:18:00.000-07:00

Whacked yes, not that she has faith, but that she had faith in something obviously awry.

Md. mom pleads guilty in cult starvation death
AP
By BEN NUCKOLS, Associated Press Writer Ben Nuckols, Associated Press Writer
BALTIMORE – A former religious cult member pleaded guilty Monday to starving her 1-year-old son to death after making an unusual deal with prosecutors: If the child is resurrected, her plea will be withdrawn. Ria Ramkissoon, 22, also agreed to testify against four other members of the now-defunct religious group known as 1 Mind Ministries. All four are charged with first-degree murder in the death of Javon Thompson.

According to a statement of facts, the cult members stopped feeding the boy when he refused to say "Amen" after a meal. After Javon died, Ramkissoon sat next to his decomposing body and prayed for his resurrection.

Ramkissoon's attorney, Steven D. Silverman, said Ramkissoon believes the resurrection will occur. She agreed to plead guilty only after prosecutors said they would drop the charges if the child comes back to life, Silverman said.
more

James Dobson resigns as chairman of Focus on the Family

2009-02-28T05:55:00.000-08:00

Not everything in the religious world is whacky. Not everyone is Benny Hinn. Jim Dobson was a class act. Sometimes delving too much into politics, but always coming back to the core values of family and God.

His voice will still be heard, though anti-free speech advocates tend to want to shut down his conservatives views on religion, homosexuality and abortion. He spoke out against heavily pro-choice American president Barack Obama, causing disputes among pro-Obama Christians.

Dobson resigns as chairman of Focus on the Family
DENVER (AP) — Conservative evangelical leader James Dobson has resigned as chairman of Focus on the Family but will continue to play a prominent role at the organization he founded more than three decades ago.

Dobson notified the board of his decision Wednesday, and the 950 employees of the Colorado Springs, Colo.-based ministry were informed Friday morning, said Jim Daly, the group's president and chief executive officer.

Dobson, 72, will continue to host Focus on the Family's flagship radio program, write a monthly newsletter and speak out on moral issues, Daly said.

Quitters: Julie and Hillary Goodridge Divorcing

2009-02-04T03:19:00.000-08:00

Surprising no one, Mass. couple who led gay marriage fight to divorce.

After proving that their commitment was a sham separating two years after legally marrying, Julie and Hillary Goodridge are legally quitting.

They apparently were willing to fight to be married, but unwilling to show that same fight to stayed married.

No matter how you slice it, divorce makes someone a liar when they said "I do." For all the noise Julie and Hillary Goodridge made, they are quitters, and what do we say to quitters?

Whack!

Ted Haggard and the Vengeance of Doom

2009-01-27T03:43:00.000-08:00

Ted Haggard is in trouble again. No, he has not done anything new. Rather, some sleazy kid decided he wants to talk about an alleged sexual relationship with Haggard. Claiming to be a spurned lover, or something otherwise questionable, he feels icky about Haggard's portrayal in the upcoming HBO movie "The Trials of Ted Haggard."

What's really going on? Maybe it happened as he claims, maybe it didn't. That's secondary to the whacked out perversion some jilted kid feels here that he wants to announce it to the world.

A salute to New Life Church, which has handled all of this with class. Thumbs down to the bonehead who wants to hurt Haggard for something the kid feels a movie producer is doing. To Ted Haggard, I hope you're dealing better with this than the kid.

Whack!
Haggard’s Church Discloses More on Sex Scandal

Pastor Steals from Flock Thousands (And Gets Busted)

2009-01-22T04:41:00.000-08:00

$370,000. That's a lot of money.

Naturally, some people will say God screwed up just because a pastor is a thief. They obviously weren't especially sure about God in the first place.

Or is an embezzler not technically a thief? Who knows? But he is an A number one chump.

Either way, few things are lower than stealing the widow's mite, especially if you are the guy in charge.

Whack!

Fla. priest accused of theft pleads guilty
WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. – One of two Florida priests accused of embezzling hundreds of thousands of dollars from their church pleaded guilty Wednesday, the same day jury selection was set to begin in the case.

Whack Job "Lord's Resistance Army" Brutally Murders Church Members

2008-12-28T15:45:00.000-08:00

Punk rebels claiming to be working for God hacked up the congregation at a Catholic Church in northeastern Democratic Republic of Congo.

These weak men, armed with weapons call themselves pretentiously, "Lord's Resistance Army." Which lord? Apparently one which hates and kills. This would not be the lord in Heaven, of course, who tells his followers to love their enemies.

This is serious stuff. Hopefully, the authorities will catch these chumps and dump them into prison. Toss in a Bible. Maybe this time, they will read it. Look at Matthew 5:44, boneheads.

Whack!

Ugandan army says rebels kill 45 people in Congo church
KAMPALA (AFP) – The Ugandan army on Sunday accused Lord's Resistance Army (LRA) rebels of hacking to death 45 people in a church in northeastern Democratic Republic of Congo.

An aid official speaking to AFP on condition of anonymity confirmed Friday's massacre, saying the killings took place in a Catholic church in the Doruma area, around 40 kilometres (25 miles) from the Sudanese border.

"There are body parts everywhere. Inside the church, the entrance and in the church compound," the aid official said.

"We got information the rebels cut 45 people into pieces," added army spokesman Captain Chris Magezi.

"They were cut with pangas (machetes) and hit with clubs...

Pope Gets Bashed by Religion Phobic Gays

2008-12-23T19:59:00.000-08:00

Where does Benedict XVI think he gets the right to pontificate about religion?

Oh, wait. He's the pope.

Meanwhile, you've got gay rights groups intolerant of his religious views.

Whack!

Pope angers campaigners with speech seen as attack on homosexualityguardian.co.uk
Gay rights groups and activists yesterday condemned passages in Pope Benedict XVI's end-of-year address in which the pontiff spoke about gender and the important distinction between men and women.

Pastorbating? Barack Obama Teases America With Religious Controversy

2008-12-18T16:31:00.000-08:00

Who will be the most suspicious of this decision?

Will it be Evangelicals and other morally conservative Christians who know Barack Obama is extremely prochoice and generally pro-gay marriage. They know Rick Warren, pastor of Saddleback Church, is not.

Or liberals, Christian and otherwise, who prefer to think of Obama as one of theirs?

Who will cringe at this proverbial reaching over the aisle the most?

No thrills up my leg here. Obama is just politicking.

WHACK!

Obama's next pastor controversy - at inauguration

Salvation Army - Getting It Right

2008-12-14T19:26:00.000-08:00

It has come to my attention that there are people who are so afraid of religion that they will not give to the Salvation Army because of its Christian worldview.

What organization so much is the spirit of Christmas as the Salvation Army? Few are as effective. Give today, whatever they believe. Don't let what someone else believes hold you back. Such discrimination isn't cool in 2008.

http://www.salvationarmyusa.org/usn/www_usn_2.nsf/vw-local/Ways-to-give

To those intolerant louts who think only atheists are worthy of their money:

Whack!

Politics and Faith?

2008-11-06T15:08:00.000-08:00

Peter Roskam Speaks at Wheaton Academy
How to work in the real world without compromising your faith.
by Anthony Trendl
Chicago Tribune

Peter Roskam, a senator in Illinois most noted nationally for taking over Henry Hyde's spot, spoke at a high school today.

...Talking about his Glen Ellyn roots and path into politics, he also candidly described the basis for his prolife views in the context of remaining consistent with his Christian faith. His theme was ethics, and thinking long-term when it comes to career while not separating faith and vocation, that a Christian is a Christian no matter what the job at hand is.
more

I gotta admit, I hardly expected one Christian Republican to survive this election, with so many Democrats seeking the big O. Good for this guy, going against the flow (and we know what's flowing).

WHACK!

Monkey Business Scientists: Science in search of the top banana

2008-11-04T16:26:00.000-08:00

Science has always bveen known to follow the money. Religion has never been as profitable, you know.

There's some green to made in the yellow, helping keep agriculture out of the red by avoiding black spots.

WHACK!

Science in search of the top banana
By ARTHUR MAX – 7 hours ago

ROTTERDAM, Netherlands (AP) — It's not easy to keep a banana yellow.

To get it to market ripe but unblemished by brown sugar spots takes careful timing, a slight fiddling with nature's rhythms and a delivery system that is increasingly computer-driven and technical.

The perfect banana used to be a rare and precious find, but technology is changing that. From the tree in the sweltering tropics to the grocery rack in the frigid north, scientists are seeking new ways to strengthen the food chain and extend the shelf life of perishables so they reach distant consumers as if freshly picked.

Commercially, the goal is to satisfy a demand for quality food anywhere, any time, and at maximum profit.

Students Struggle in First-ever State Science Test

2008-09-23T16:59:00.000-07:00

Weird. As the nation becomes more secular, science students are getting dumber.

Students Struggle in First-ever State Science Test
September 23, 2008

Whack!

Scores from the first-ever statewide assessment for science show that just one in four Rhode Island students is proficient in the subject.

Students in grades 4, 8 and 11 were tested, with fourth-graders showing the highest proficiency of all three groups.

The state Department of Education said Tuesday that in Rhode Island's urban districts, where test scores were lower overall, only 3 percent of eighth graders tested proficient in science.

Gov. Don Carcieri said now that the state has seen the scores, it can begin to address the problem.

Board of Regents Chairman Robert Flanders, Jr. said officials need to look at whether the state has enough science teachers and appropriate training and materials.

© Copyright 2008 Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.