Bikie

Inside the Engine #3

2016-02-08T20:11:00.004+00:00

Winter training. When does it end? When did it begin?

Well, as a short-hand description of "base" and "build", the terms that physiologists and sports scientist would use, probably around November for me. When will it end? Probably at the end of February or the middle of March. Importantly, when will the seasons begin to normalise themselves so I can at some point "go outside" more often?

November, December. That's all good. Christmas punctuates those two like a tidy full stop.

January kicks in, it's humid and rainy, but there's no racing to be done just yet and everything is "as planned".

February however, is a gale ridden, depressing puddle-fest and this dents the new year optimism.

During winter my shed has been my sanctuary weeks and months spent in my trusty outhouse. At the minute, I'm contemplating another month's hard labour. With little prospect of Storm Imogen subsiding, it looks like I'll be spending more time staring at the fridge freezer, the remnants of paint cans from projects past and the discarded bicycle tyres and accouterments that will be tidied up on that mythical day when all blokes "sort out their sheds". Honest.

But, I am now developing a cycling version of Stockholm Syndrome, I have begun to love my turbo.

My sessions on Zwift bring relief from the dulling pain and monotony. My appreciation of BBC Radio and Planet Rock is heightened and the variability of road training is cast asunder. Getting through February in terms of completing my training programme is going to be key to getting March's races off to a good start and I suspect that controlling the variables (power, intensity, duration) on the turbo will pay dividends, but at a cost.

I have learnt that turbo work increases the laundry demands several-fold. I am now up to four sets of cycling shorts, at least 50% of which are always in the process of being cleaned. Two towels and a sweat catcher are de rigeur for most sessions, as is a sweat-wicking base layer and t-shirt. Some sessions during January have required leg and arm warmers it's been that cold.

My worst experience to date was doing the 'dash of shame' back to the house in a sodden base-layer in freezing conditions whilst trying to run in cleats and not drop my Garmin, the laptop and the three water bottles I was using, in the dark, and in a gale. I looked like I had been to a very bad kind of Brighton Rave, or so I am told. I have no idea where Brighton is. Or what a rave is for that matter. February may have made Don McLean shiver, it's making me drip everywhere, and then shiver. So 2-1 to me on that Donny boy.

I've also learnt that sweat doesn't evaporate on the static bike, it just runs down your leg in the manner of an accidental wee-wee. The sweat then pools in your right shoe. Never the left shoe. Always the right.

But somehow, I kind of miss it when I have a recovery day or am forced to do an "outside ride", e.g. anything over two hours and one minute of riding. I'm up to two hours of turbo in one session, based on the fact that I now have to take food in to the shed to fuel myself on the for the longer Zwift sessions. And frankly, this is a sign that enough is enough. You have to draw a line somewhere and 120 minutes is my Rubicon. If I'm at a point of moving an armchair and/or camping shower to accommodate my forays in to the virtual cyclo-world, I may consider applying for a new postcode for my "studio annexe". I may have to by necessity.

I am still a strong believer that there is no substitute for a good ride, in great weather on the beautiful open road. My own power output and interest is heightened on glorious, sun-kissed tarmac - the problem is, there isn't much glorious anything at this time of year. So you just have to make your own distractions.

My key winter findings from the "Pain Cave" (also know as "a shed"), for the record are:

Radio5 Live football commentary on a live match is about the same length as a decent turbo session. The 45 minute halves and 15 minute break make nice ways of mapping out the intervals and duration of parts of sessions, e.g. 45 mins of a given effort, ease off, repeat. Listening to Liverpool play is as infuriating as being drafted on Zwift, I nearly fell off the turbo when they beat Norwich. I had a massive tantrum when Sunderland pegged two goals back last Saturday.
Zwift workouts are the business.
No matter how I set things up the friction on the turbo has a mind of its own making the first 20 minutes the equivalent of a physical version of BBC2's Only Connect. The tyre pressure is the same, the wheel is in the same place, the gears are in the same ratio. Is it the same as last time? Is it heck.
Being awarded a new virtual Trek Emonda on Zwift halfway through a sprint interval session is as much use as an ashtray on a motorbike, or a Trek Emonda (real or imagined).
I no longer eat meals with my family during the week.
Planet Rock is good. Except when it isn't. Which is when AC/DC or Iron Maiden are not being played. The adverts and slippages in to Prog Rock are bad.
Mark Riley on Radio 6 Music is either brilliant or not. His guests are usually not. But he does have a quiz based on what band t-shirt he is wearing. I never get the answer but at least it stops him playing Swedish Acid Skiffle for five minutes while he tees up the questions.
Steve Lamacq is not compatible with any form of turbo work. Or anything else for that matter. There is a reason why he is no longer on Radio 2.
Coming in to the Pain Cave (see above) to search for frozen mince beef for the dinner I won't get chance to eat, thereby forcing a change in the 'feng shui' of the Palace of Perspiration is simply not in Debrett's. Moving my impromptu plastic box/camping chair/laptop viewing podium as part of this search for ingredients just isn't sporting. Asking "Going well?", and walking off without receiving the reply (even if it is mumbled grunt) is just plain rude. Especially when the poser of said question, in true Pavlovian style, locks the shed on exit.
Netgear Wi-Fi Extenders are fab. Not least for piping 20-30MBps Zwiftage to the shed, but also enabling communication to/from my laptop so I can email someone (daughter) to come and unlock the door (see directly above).

I'm not sure what I am going to do when I do actually go outside and have to interact with society again. I'm also not sure that society is ready to receive the beckoning horde of Zombie-like Zwifters who will be returning to reality (or at least the physical world) in a few weeks' time.

Inside the Engine #2

2016-01-26T18:36:00.001+00:00

Geraint Thomas in his rather readable tome "The World of Cycling According to G" talks, amongst other things, about his time in the British Track squad in the 2000s. His narrative unfolds around how, once the team had decided on its goals (essentially World domination), the team committed to meet the goal. The coaching and supporting staff did likewise and then it was a case of trusting the process.

I have long been a fan of trying to focus on the controllable variables that accompany time-trial racing. In Thomas's book (I am not going to call him 'G'), he restates some good coaching mantra that reinforce this philosophy, e.g. there will be external influences that can knock you off-track. Anticipate external factors but don't get all angsty about things you cannot control.

As amateurs and part-timers who have commitments off the bike that professionals do not have, everyone in TSE has to strike a balance between what time and effort we can commit to the sport. And the commitment piece is critical. You only get out what you put in and all that, in time-trialling it is very much a correlation between input and result. Outside of the track pursuit discipline there are probably as few external variables affecting performance as you are likely to get. So over the winter months it has been great to watch and participate in a team that is committed, is believing more and more in the processes of training 'right' and training 'smart'.

It has been interesting to see how riders have dealt with bugs, colds, time demands with work and family commitments over Christmas and the New Year. For some there have been outbursts of frustration when they've had a cold or virus, and this kind of frustration shows how committed the team are right now. Fortunately a combination of cathartic and communal social-media outpourings: "It's the end of the world, I missed a few days on Zwift" or "How can I possibly survive the season, I missed a week in December" have been dealt with through a mix of mutual support and also plain-speaking.

Trust the process, you are committed to you goals. Form is not irrevocably lost in a week or two. Indeed, quite the opposite is true. You will #SmashItUp, to borrow a Bottrilism, if you simply commit and follow through on the plan over the course of the year.

Over the course of winter most of the team's riders have put in anywhere between 50-80 training sessions, and it shows. Functional threshold power tests are strong and ubiquitous. Everyone is talking in watts and FTP now. The support structure is blooming and the direction of travel is probably as good as any amateur squad in the country.

And it's still only January...

Inside the Engine #1

2016-01-03T18:20:00.004+00:00

Just for a change of emphasis and to maybe breathe some life back in to this blog, I thought I would post some insights in to the workings of Team Sales Engine time trial squad.

It's Boxing Day 2015. A note comes in on the team forum from Roy Robinson who rode the local Hitchin Nomads CC 'Boxing Day 10' time trial, and in doing so closes off the year's racing for our team.

The Boxing Day event is more of a social activity than anything too serious, but there is a number on your back and as such, it's a race. Given the team have been racing all over the country since March, when the season kicks off in earnest, this curtain call is quite a poignant moment. And not because of the performances, which incidentally have generally been fantastic during the course of the year, but because of what happened next.

Roy has been racing for donkey's years (and I hope he won't mind me stating that) and he has amassed so much experience and knowledge but following this final ride, he asked where his position on the bike could be improved for next year. Within minutes there were a range of really great suggestions, many of which were coming from relative newcomers to the sport, some of which came from old hands and experienced (and rapid) teammates. I've seen other clubs' forums and see people give no advice or worse, duff advice so that the rider in question can be kept 'in their place'. Not a bit of it in the Engine.

What struck me earlier in the year was Steve Franklin helping to put my own feet back on the ground with what appeared to be a throwaway comment regarding coaching. I was debating the merits of getting a coach, but being a coach couldn't see much benefit. Steve's comment, "I'm a guitar teacher, and I have three teachers." made the metaphorical light bulb go on for me. It was just the little nudge that helped restore good-Karma to the ycling universe at the time.

A few of the guys have been struggling a bit for form over Christmas, given the multitude of bugs and viruses that seem to whack British-Man during holiday season. Again, the support and advice dished out and received has been overwhelmingly supportive. Most of the squad have already put in 8-12 weeks of monster training already ahead of 2016's season, a few days here and there on the sofa isn't going to matter a jot once the sun eventually comes out again.

So, if there's a point to today's little missive it is probably two-fold: firstly, everyday is a school day on (and off) the bike and secondly, if you are receptive and a member of a squad as good as ours the improvements will be plentiful and significant. You mark my words.

RTTC National Circuit Championship - 2015

2015-10-21T10:56:00.006+01:00

I rode the RTTC National Circuit Championship at Thruxton a few days ago (Oct 19th 2015). A write up is on the Team Sales Engine blog.

Love this photo - war face and nice and aero

Really great event, well organised, great circuit and really fair conditions for all riders. Managed to get my 'war face' snapped on the circuit and the pictures are as follows. Last year's ride was a shambles as my chain developed a fault and caused me to have to put the bike in the recovery position whilst swearing at it with a mile left to race. There was an issue with Shimano 11 speed chains apparently. Gladly this year the bike was fab, the rider was in good enough form and the weather was dry but a tad windy.

I was 55th on GC and 8th in the National Masters A category. A nice way to end a season of several highs. Great to race this event with Sam Hayes again and also really good to have James Gomm in tow for Ostrich Curry and general mirth making.

The Italian Job - Passo dello Stelvio

2015-09-21T17:49:00.001+01:00

Few places in cycling can rival the Alps for sheer scale. Even fewer can rival the Stelvio as the definitive mountain col. No matter the language, Stelvio Pass, Stilfersjoch, Passo dello Stelvio, this col, from whichever direction is brutal and beautiful in equal measure, I can attest to this having had a crack at it from both the Prato side and then the Bormio side.

With the Foscagna, Eira and Fuorn cols already in my legs and 60 miles traversed across Italy and Switzerland, the Stelvio beckoned. The next three hours were to be the most gruelling and educational of my cycling life.

The climb begins by rolling from Prato allo Stelvio at around 3,000ft. The target is the summit of the pass which is around 17 miles away, and 6,000ft higher. The pass is only bettered in altitude in the Alps by the Iseran. What unfolded was an almost religious experience. There are 48 hairpin bends on the climb from this side. The first three (48 to 46) take a while to appear and an even longer period to complete, a purgatorial prelude. I had ridden with Simon Wilson and James Gomm to the first hairpins, and then pushed on alone for 85 minutes of steady tapping on my 36*28 gear. A gearing which was way too big for the circumstances but which was good enough to crack a 5-6mph average speed.

I could see Simon on the lower slopes, hovering around 200-300 yards back, he was going steadily and James was not far off him. As we progressed the ~10% gradient was becoming harder to deal with, but the real kick in the teeth was the increasingly windy and wet conditions. The rain had become a full-on storm and the wind was now gusting 35mph.

At hairpin 22 several of our colleagues who began the day with us began to abandon. As a trio we were riding just on the edge of the storm, the only break in the gloom was the dozen or so Ferraris that were being thrashed along the pass. I'm no petrol-head so the spectacle was wasted on me. At that point in time I was looking for road position, so the screaming engines were more of a distraction for me than a delight, I was weaving around the falling rocks and shattered branches from the overhead pine trees to try and manage my tyres from puncture. A puncture or mechanical at that stage would be terminal - quite literally.

Stelvio Pass from the summit, facing towards the Prato side, two days after the ascent of doom

At hairpin 10 the wind lifted me and my bike (the lovely Victoria) completely off the road. Boom! Welcome to the game son. The wind was increasingly ferocious. My thighs and calves were on fire. My focus was solely on getting to the top - the inner tester in me took over, 'I don't DNF and I'm not about to start now'.

My kit was drenched and I was drenched. Fortunately it was good kit and I'd held off the elements as much as anyone could, this was now a purely head game.

Simon went passed me, we exchanged glances and nods. We said nothing, like men on the gallows waiting for the drop. James went ahead and pushed hard for the top. It would take him 2 days to recover from that effort.

Getting to haipin 2 was the single most difficult physical thing I have ever done. Mentally it would be right up there too. Something akin to special forces selection I guess. Even my cramp had cramp. Twisted and contorted I pushed on.

The wind on the top of the climb was brutal, two of us sought shelter in a doorway until we spotted that the hotel at the top was open. We bundled for cover and then the enormity of what had happened set in. Shivering and shaking was the order of the day, a couple of co-riders came in, frozen and soaked to the bone. Blankets were conjured up by the hotel staff and lycra-layers were peeled off to stave off hypothermia, with modest effect.

A support vehicle arrived, dry clothes appeared, coffee, crisps, biscuits were consumed with haste. And then the suffering began to relent as we took sanctuary in a commandeered minibus and trailer. Bormio please driver, don't spare the horses.

The summit monument to Fausto Coppi.

The day of the ascent would have been my late Father-in-Law's birthday, I didn't realise it till afterwards, as a great fan of Coppi Brian may well have been pushing me on somehow. That one was for you BP. The tales of the Stelvio and Cima Coppi are renowned for a reason but I now have my own personal post-script that will stay with me forever.

My respect for this pass is now absolute.

The summit of the Gavia - what a difference a day makes

I feel the need, the need for.... ...a glass of celebratory Wine Society Merlot

2015-08-01T22:34:00.001+01:00

Well I seem to have gone rather quickly in today's Chronos RT 10 mile time trial.

I posted 21 minutes and 44 seconds to be precise, which is 5 seconds quicker than my fastest time ever (set in 2014 on the F15/10 after a week of 18,000m and 500 miles-ish of Alpine climbing training).

I am going quicker now than I did 10 years ago. I must, therefore, be like a fine wine, maturing with age.

There can be no other explanation.

Thanks go to a support network in the shape of my team mates, in 'the Engine' and elsewhere - and a VERY supportive family who let me traipse around the East Midlands each weekend from April-September in pursuit of fitness, mental well-being and performance improvements.

F2A/10 Chronos RT - about 6 miles in. Thanks to Davey Jones for the pic.

I did smash my body and brain to bits into the prevailing headwind going out to the turn. Some would say there isn't much of either to smash.

Positive splits, it's the only way.

Some pointless data that only me and Steve Robinson care about.

It takes two baby

2015-07-29T19:05:00.001+01:00

Last night I was treated to the following view for approximately 23 minutes and 36 seconds.

But what is it viewers?

I am sure you are now trying to work out what it is. Or have clicked elsewhere in your browser having realised this is weird.

I'll help you out but bear in mind this is something that has been burnt on to my retinas over the past 24 hours.

If you have not worked it out, it is Steve Robinson.

More accurately, it is Steve Robinson's backside as viewed from about three inches away.

I like Steve a lot, he has been a friend for approximately 15 years. We have raced together for most of that period and we share a common love of Stewart Lee's comedy. He also has a van akin to Team Sky's Death Star. What's not to like?

But to spend half an hour that far from where his lunch would normally be exiting his body, takes some doing. And also some convincing, let's get that straight right now.

So, apart from a pastime performed in the Cannock Chase area by ex-professional footballers, what could we be up to? Well 'give me your answer do', if it wasn't whizzing along on a racing tandem.

Riding a 'normal' time trial bike at speed is exhilarating. Riding a 2-man version with no control over the front/pointy end but still attempting to make it go quicker is probably the comparable to static-line parachuting from 800ft, versus jumping off a Red-Bull-branded-space-balloon thingy in a flying-bat suit.

Tandem racing, it is the future. I have seen it, I have scoffed at it, my prejudice for the tandem was rivaled only by that of my disdain for the folding bike (and all forms of trikes).

But that was yesterday, before my road to Damascus (or Old Warden, Bedfordshire) moment.

My only lingering thought, apart from the visual scar (above) is that the words of the song 'Daisy, Daisy' and associated reference to a bicycle made for two, need to be struck from the canon of English language popular verse. Or at least it should be annotated along the lines of the following.

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer, do,

(Translates to 'So long as the answer is not 'Slow-the-f**k-down!! We're going to die on that corner!')

I'm half crazy all for the love of you.

(Half-crazy? And the rest. Especially if you think we are going to smash 350 Watts up that hill.)

It won't be a stylish marriage,

(Easy for you to say, you are not stoking this thing - I left my dignity and any residual style at the signing on point along with my £2 levy to the CTT.)

I can't afford a carriage,

(Because you blew it all on carbon fibre, tandem specific wheels and modified Sugino hubs.)

But you'd look sweet upon the seat

(Sweet? Sweaty more like.)

Of a bicycle made for two

(Well, that is factually correct - so leave that line in)

I think HAL in '2001- A Space Odyssey' sang about this. Just before he fired his best mate out of the air-lock or similar.

For the record, Steve (pilot) and I went round the Hitchin Nomads Briercliffe 10 course, which is not flat, in well over 25mph. That is half a minute quicker than I have ever gone on my own. Still grinning, although seeking therapy.

Putting some skin in the game

2015-05-24T19:14:00.000+01:00

Yes, I know, it seems a while... ...I have been inundated with requests to blog about my travails and travels in the renowned British Time Trialling circles.

Since my last broadcast, I have done some races, got ill (nothing life or death but a touch more than "man flu"), got better. Did some more races.

To amuse the reader, I shall regale you with yesterday's endeavours. I entered the Lampard RC F15/10 on the Marston Moretaine course. I have been training well, the numbers were good on the power and pulse and although it was a bit of a hard day to call weather wise, the runes looked promising.

And then it happened.The zip on my skinsuit ripped, just south of my navel.

This meant that not only did I look like a reject from Stan Lee's sketch book,, e.g .Shit Time Trial Hero Man, it also meant I could not take to the start line due to CTT's regulations on attire, e.g. "Competitors must be clothed from the neck to at least mid-thigh". All told, I looked like a deviant and I would have stopped me racing too.

To make matters worse, I drew the attention of both James Gomm and Mike Webb who both attempted to "yank my zip". Bearing in mind they(Gomm and Webb) were crouched at midriff height "tugging hard to release my fastener" this could not have looked good.

If Bedfordshire Police had patrolled the underpass where we had parked (yes I know, it gets worse doesn't it), I dare say Stan Collymore and I would be in the same support group now working out why our lives were in respective tatters.

With no solution in sight, I took to wearing my winter jersey over the top of the offending garment. This at least hid my rippling six pack from the attendant masses and also allowed me to do the actual race. The net effect of wearing the equivalent of parachute was not formally quantified but I am suggesting it was at least 1.5 seconds per mile.

As Morrissey once said, "I can laugh about it now but at the time it was terrible" I'll be packing two skinsuits next time.

Stay tuned for more fashion advice.

Time Trial Round Up - 2014

2014-10-21T18:43:00.002+01:00

The Autumn nights are drawing in and the temperature is dropping. The hill climbs are done and dusted and the knee warmers are beginning to make way for the "longs" and the full finger gloves. Winter is coming and with it comes time to reflect on the season gone before planning out the regime for the season to come.

2014 saw my life-time 10 mile best get shaved by 3 seconds and also saw another solid 57 minute 25 miler go in the book.

Hitting 21.49 for 10 miles was a major achievement given that it is around 12 years since I have posted a sub-22 minute time. I was optimistic that I could carry some form following a week at altitude on the Raid des Alpes (September) so breaking the mark with comparative ease (it felt oddly "easy" on the day) was a bonus. I had taken 30 seconds off my last-three-season best in the Bossard Wheelers event in August (22.19) which meant that over the course of the year my time has improved by 1 minute. A significant improvement. Tick.

Rides of over 10 miles were more numerous for me in 2014, at least when compared to 2013 and 2012. The upshot was a solid 57.42 in July on the Bentley (Hants) based H25/8 course. Sadly Phil Silver DNF'd on that one. I suspect that event will be on the "to do" list for 2015 as it is a good course albeit not a rapid one compared to the E2 near Newmarket. Tick.

Having been knocked off on a Hitchin Nomads club run in January/February time my winter was ruined. Another collarbone/shoulder injury affected my fitness and it took around 10 weeks simply to get back to square one. To say I was cheesed off was an understatement. Inexperienced riding in icy conditions took a few of us out. I won't be repeating that combination again. Work commitments also saw me chucking a bike in the car and riding with VC Sevale in Malvern. A really friendly bunch who let me ride some of their evening time trials. The Malvern courses are sporting and pretty idyllic so that was a silver lining even if it meant some complex logistics and sneaking bikes in and out of hotel rooms.

F15/10 action in August (Davey Jones with the snap)

The biggest change for me this year was riding with Team Salesengine. Although I am still an active member of the Hitchin Nomads CC, the club isn't a dedicated time trial outfit (nor does it claim to be) as such it has been difficult in a personal sense to gain impetus and motivation to move up to (or even back to) the next level. Feeding of the energy and competition in a time trial squad yielded huge benefits. As did a week at altitude on the Raid des Alpes.

The specificity of time trialling needs real focus and although the Nomads has gone from strength to strength membership wise (107 and counting), at a personal level I needed a boost and challenge in terms of riding more TTs within a focused and dare I say faster cadre of riders. That is not to say the Nomads do not have some good TT riders. I was chuffed to see Nick Hickman, Ben Wilson and Gavin Ashfield break the 10 mile team and individual records this year. Nick Hickman in particular has had a stellar season. Proving you get out what you put in. Chapeau Nick! Ben also represented GB in European Triathlon. I am looking forward to seeing him continue. The Nomads is a social and sociable club and its catholic range of activities are its strength.

But back to the "here and now". I am lucky in the sense I have good friends in the cycling community. Over the course of 2014 I have managed to plunder information from Justin Layne (ex-CC Ashwell - thanks for the super hard training sessions) and Simon Norman (BRCC - and probably the best TT rider within 50 miles of the Beds/Herts area). Again, I am really pleased they have progressed so significantly.

Mark Gray (BRCC), John Pick and Jason Stuart (CCA) have also been good for banter and support, most notably on the BRCC SPOCO circuits. These sporting course (SPOCO) races are a must for anyone wanting to improve all round technical riding, handling and fitness. Graham Laming is an ever-present at the Cardington HQ - he and those like him - are the bedrock on which British TT'ing is built. Paul Bullen has been a rock (yes, that is with an "r") despite the "Black Books" level of intimidation and harassment in the shop.

Me, Steve Robinson, Sam Hayes (October 2014 - Thruxton) - note the matching kit/van combo and lack of awning.

My time trial highlights this year are (quick times aside) probably as follows:

Riding the Milton Keynes 4up team time trial on closed roads with Steve Robinson, Chris Hartley and Phil Silver. Phil smashed his bike to bits within seconds of the start so it was a full bore effort from there on having lost Phil so early on.
Hitting the track at Thruxton with Steve and Sam Hayes to compete in the national circuit champs. Sam's times have been getting within range as the season progressed so I think he's been a good carrot. A top 40 place should be achievable next year for me.
My ride on the Interclub 30 was a good one - marred only by another rider attempting to draft me. I was pleased with that performance and will be able to claim my last HNCC trophy off the back of that (the Allan Porter Trophy)
The Victoria CC 10.2 (August) was also a revelation - 23.37 got me 12th place on a route I didn't know prior to riding it. It is however a brilliant "out and back" course running along a twisty rolling B Road near Saffron Walden. Sam and Steve claimed the 2-up competition and will be eyeballs out to retain it.
The Northampton and District CA series events I rode (I missed the first few) saw strong collective and individual performances from the Salesengine team. The final results should see us hit 2nd place overall in the team competition.
And finally - even when I punctured on a BRCC event and was faced with a 2 mile walk in cycling shoes Mr Gomm appeared like Jeeves to my Wooster to whisk me back to the HQ. Serendipity cost me a pint but it was worth it.

Next year is going to be a blast.

Raid des Alpes - part 2

2014-10-15T14:34:00.001+01:00

What goes up, must come down. Or so the saying goes. Having endured several hours of climbing the carrot dangling at the top of the climbs was the chance to open the taps up and push some speed on the beautiful alpine descents.

This is the scalextric style view of what you can expect to rocket down and there's miles of it.

The length of the descents coming off the back of cols such as the Galibier, Vars, Bonette, Saisse etc has no real comparison in UK terms.

In my view they are gifts which keep on giving.

Having taken the time to trundle 26km up the Bonette or the several hours to rock up the Iseran, the least the French can do is lay some good tarmac to allow Johnny English to get the adrenaline levels going. And that, in the most part is what happened.

Being more suited to going down a hill than up it (in comparison to my companions at least), I took a view of "if it is worth doing, it's worth doing ~~well~~ fast". With James Gomm and Rob Fryers in particular we had some real grins ratcheting up the speeds as we weaved down of the higher cols.

Hitting speeds in excess of 50mph, some of the descents became battles of nerve as well as stamina as holding on to a carbon bike with under 20mm of tyre tread in contact with the road is tiring. The arms begin to burn and the neck and back begin to wonder what is going on. The wind rush and exhilaration make up for it though. The GoPro footage (above) taken on the Col de Vars gives a good idea of some of the lines we were taking. James is hanging on to my wheel here deliberately to film the lines and give an impression of what it was like. Keep an eye on the horizon line to see how much we threw the bikes around.

Critical to success (and being able to avoid total wipe-out) is the ability to relax on the bike and to focus on where you want to be in the road. Taking hairpin bends at speed and flowing through them in the right gear helps save energy and keep momentum. Observing the valleys and bends below is also an absolute must given that these are not closed roads. A near miss with a Fiat served to shoot more adrenaline in to the system but the calculated risks taken ensure safe passage. On that occasion being in control of the bike allowed me to flick the rear wheel out to create safe passage. This kind of proves the point that descending is all about being fluid and loose - I don't want to do too much more field testing like that though. James likened the downhills at speed to slalom skiing and that analogy stacks up - even though I've never skied I can see the logic. I did raise an eyebrow when he ordered extra espresso when we got to a Cafe at the bottom of the Saisse though. I don't think it had any affect.

I'm not sure if it's the ~~inner child~~ inherent nutter in me that thought going as quickly as possible wearing only lycra and a plastic helmet was a good idea? On one of the peaks I think I was paid a compliment by one of the other riders when he said, "you go first, you are good at this sort of downhill thing." Either that or he wanted to be out of sight if/when some form of terminal event or smash occurred.

I think it was the former. If you can ride down Hillfoot near Cardington on the tribars at full tilt anything that involves proper handlebars and brakes that aren't built around carbon pads has to be child's play surely? You can see where it is easy to get in to a breakaway move given the speed we were holding.We readily tapped out average speeds of well over 30mph for very long stretches of road. It could have been a better strategy to hold something back on some of these drops as there may well be 3 or 4 to do each day, as well as the associated "going back up" bits. I have tried to blank those out as it's the rocking downhills and associated rush that leave the enduring grin.

Two steps Fast Forward..one step back (to the local bike shop)

2014-09-19T13:55:00.001+01:00

Things ain’t what they used to be.

Firstly, cleats wear out way too quickly. In the good old days of SPDs (mountain bike style) and SPD-R, the cleats used to be made of metal. These allowed the cycling equivalent of tap-dancing in various cafes. The move to plastic based cleats by most suppliers now means that walking around in cycling shoes is a good way of wrecking the cleats. Living on building site doesn’t help longevity nor does lolling around Broom Wagon stops in the Alps.

Having said that, the wear over a period of 12 weeks on my current “all rounder” shoes is catastrophic. Almost to the point of being difficult or biomechanically dangerous to pedal.

Bring back robust cleats!

Before and after.

Now for the comedy customer service of the week award.

Last year I bought a Fast Forward 9/10 speed disc wheel (second hand via Shorter’s in Potters Bar). Having run 9 speed on all of my kit for donkey’s years, I have finally bitten the bullet to upgrade to 11 speed. Not for any reason other than getting replacement bits and interoperability with my (new-ish) road bike.

Exhibit A.

I bought the Fast Forward 11 speed Freehub body – which is approved for upgrade and is an OEM component.

Exhibit B.

I took my bike to the (excellent) local bike store (Paul Bullen’s in Hitchin) to have said upgrade performed.

Lo and behold! The beautiful Ultegra 11 speed cassette and rear mech’ were touching the surface of the wheel. This is a bad thing.

So, two things happenend.

1) Paul looked at working out a “local” solution. 2) I took the opportunity to contact Fast Forward’s all singing, all dancing international customer service line in Holland. No one answered the phone. For sure. [Insert joke about smoking and pancakes here.]

I filled in the web form as per the following:

Hi - I have a FFWD disc wheel (road, tubular) which is running shimano 9/10 speed hub.

I have bought a replacement 11 speed Shimano freehub and the new 11 speed Ultegra rear mech is touching the wheel surface. The cassette is basically too close to the wheel.

Do you have a resolution or fix for this?

Answer (after two days) from Paligap (FFWD’s UK proxy):

Thanks for the enquiry, there is no other solution than to not use the gears close to the carbon. Otherwise he should consider to purchase a carbon disc wheel 11 speed.

Aside from the pigeon English, basically this translates to, “Eerrrr, sounds hard. Buy something else that costs about 800 quid and forget the fact you bought the converter.

By this time Mr Bullen had already crafted a solution using a very thin spacer.

Local Bike Shops. Love ‘em or lose ‘em.

Raid des Alpes - part 1

2014-09-15T20:02:00.003+01:00

Imagine smashing your head against a wall for three hours. Imagine, doing this at altitude. Imagine that you have done this for several days prior.

This is alpine riding.

Well at least the uphill bits at times. I am just back from the epic (an overused word I know but not in this case) bike ride from Thonon Les Bains near Geneva, to Antibes on the Mediterranean coast. If the 500 miles in 6 days was not enough, try sticking in the equivalent of riding from sea level to the top of Ben Nevis 18 times. The aim of the "Raid" is to successfully get to Nice in 6 days via 8 set points (where you receive a stamp to prove you have made it). The cols (around 30 of them) are like a who's who of cycling folklore (a where's where really). The assemblage includes the Iseran, Telegraphe, de la Ramaz, Galibier and Bonette to name a few.

The highest road pass in Europe (according to the French).

Being a big lad, i.e. not a stunt double for the malnutrioned climbers of the Tour, some of these "icons" proved to be a test of sheer will power rather than cycling finesse. I'm not exactly a slouch on a bike but two to three hours of climbing at anywhere "as quick" as 4mph is pretty gruelling. The steepest gradients were around 1 in 5 (part of the Roseland and the top of the Bonette, the latter being the French's claim for the highest road pass in Europe). The average gradient for some was around 5-7%. My oppo, Nigel Wilson, pulled the following together from ClimbByBike. See for yourself how horrendous some of the profiles are. Data in metres.

Col	Altitude	Length	Climbing	Gradient	Difficulty Index
Colle delle Finestre	2178	18.6	1694	9.1%	249
Col de la Bonette	2715	24	1589	6.6%	166
Col du Galibier	2645	18.2	1244	6.8%	148
Col du Pre	1703	12.2	963	7.9%	145
Col de la Couillole	1678	16	1168	7.3%	145
Col du Telegraphe	1566	12	848	7.1%	116
Col de l’Iseran	2770	48	1955	4.1%	114
Col d’Izoard	2360	19	1105	5.8%	112
Col de Vars	2108	19.4	1111	5.7%	108
Col du Mont Cenis	2083	9.8	682	6.9%	107

The climb of the Iseran (from Val d'Isere) introduced a new canon of swearing to the Alpine landscape. It also involved a game of "Guess the CB Call sign for this member of the Nomads" and a spontaneous chorus of "Come on and join our Convoy" by Kris Kristofferson. And no, James Gomm and I will never divulge the names we came up with.

What goes on torture, stays on torture.

Going up some of these "hills" requires balls. Big balls. I think most, if not all of the group I was with, regardless of ability would admit to going to some pretty deep depths mentally at some point, For me the ascent of the Bonette (one of the most beautiful passes in Europe) was like watching paint dry. Sacre Bleu! I hear. Well I was in survival mode at that point. The less glamorous roads of the Couillole and St Raphael saw me (relatively speaking) fly up. There was little rhyme or reason to this other than riding conservatively when it mattered and also not having a heavy lunch. The omelette at Pras de Lys on day 1, when combined with 30 degree heat nearly did me in.

So, Simon's top tip for climbing in the alps is: do it at your own pace. If you don't believe me, simply ask Mark Young (HNCC) how he improved over the week and also who his "coach" was on the Col du Pre. Where's my beer Mark?

Bossard Wheelers F15/10 Open Time Trial

2014-08-31T00:21:00.000+01:00


F15/10 Bossard Wheelers courtesy of Davey Jones (near the 8 mile mark).

A windy day on the Brogborough based 10 course saw a LTS best for me as I clocked 22.19 for 10 miles. This, I think, was the second fastest time I have clocked at the distance, 21.52 being my best around 10-12 years ago on the F1/10 (on the A1 on a hot summer's afternoon).

It was hard work coming back from the turn at 5.5 mile but getting "stuck in" on the return leg made the (rapid) outbound leg count. Looking at the provisional results I was up on many of the riders I vie with on this course.

My team mates, Sam Hayes (21.54 for 9th place), Ric Palmer (23.48) and Chris Hartley (25.02) all did great rides, so on what could have been a bit of a challenging and daunting day modest celebration was the order of the evening. I thought the field was stronger than usual, due to a misprint many riders thought they were heading off for an afternoon on the much faster F11 course. So getting 20th place was very satisfying.

Geoff Bunyan and John Pick, along with Mark Gray and the BRCC guys provided light relief and general banter. Always good to see that although things are taken seriously, there is a good craic to be had and good camaraderie regardless of team or affiliation.

CTT Results available: here.

Victoria CC 10.2

2014-08-24T17:14:00.002+01:00

I rode the Victoria CC 10.2 yesterday and actually did quite a good time of 23.37. The course is a beaut. Not a drag-strip or a "full on" SPOCO, more of a roadman's route with a nice couple of "S" bend sections in the leafy Essex villages around Saffron Walden.

Team mates Sam Hayes and Steve Robinson nailed the 2-up series award which was great for them as they have worked hard to accommodate each others' riding styles, strengths and weaknesses. Sam is probably the quicker "flat out" rider and Steve has great handling skills so it is a good combination. Having smashed some rapid times out on the tandem (sub 20 mins for 10 miles) it is fair to say they are well matched. Here's to a successful defence of the title in 2015.

Sam Hayes, Steve Robinson - Team Salesengine.co.uk - Victoria CC 2-up series winners 2014

Having not raced in any form of competition for a month was novel for me mid-season but it obviously shows that miles on the road (in preparation for Geneva-Nice in September) and rest (cider) can be of benefit.

Snaps captured from Davey Jones (gratis, he is a top man) and SportInPictures (for a couple of quid - below).

Davey Jones captures me at the turn at around 5 miles

Nearly home - great shot with about a mile to go from SportInPictures

Keeping the Riff-Rapha out

2014-04-05T11:07:00.002+01:00

The sun was out, the air was refreshing, the company was good, the roads were quiet, the cafe was warm and modern, what could spoil the Sunday Club Run? Spoil is probably too strong a word but let's go with the theme for now.

Well, it was this... (points to picture below).

The Velominati have their so-called rules, but there is little which can be applied to the appropriateness of over-priced, over-stated Denim in *my* club run cafe. I am a tolerant man, ask any of my Brompton riding friends**

Crimes against Cycling Exhibit A

Rapha Jeans.

Yes.

That's what I thought.

If you think that I am making a mountain out of a molehill, please never speak to me again, unfriend me from LinkedFace, move to somewhere inside the District and Circle line and sell any bike which is not a fixed gear courier pavement cruiser or Condor fixie.

I'd never actually seen a pair of the offending articles before and as many of you know, I really appreciate the Rapha branding machine for the way it portrays cyclists.

I've often dreamt of being floppy haired fop riding up and down thoroughfares of Clerkenwell on my way to read the iPad version of the Guardian at the local Venezualan Fair Trade Guava and Quince Juice Bar.

But somehow I've never really made the grade.

Having said that, if I turned up in the blue and gold lycra uniform I sport on Sundays I would probably have been mistaken for some form of "Grumpy Super-Hero" tribute act. A cycling club in full flight is probably about the only thing that could rival the Marvel Super-Hero pantheon for the amount of spandex/ lycra/ figure hugging material that is (just about) legal to wear in public. If Brendon Reynolds had turned up in his Argyle patterned overshoes we'd have looked like the militant faction of the Ronnie Corbett Sock Appreciation Society. See Exhibit B.

Exhibit B

So, there is a time and place for all things. And that is my point. "They" would frown upon "me and my kind" in that London. So it's only fair to adopt an equally "snobbish" stance.

The fact that the Rapha Jeans (Exhibit A) were spotted in Rural Bedfordshire is as incongruous as the above. Cycling is a broad church and we are all brothers and sisters on the road. But the Cafe is sacrosanct. I know can understand the logic of the Countryside Alliance's arguments (although not support it) but let's be clear, the rock cakes, mugs of murky greasy spoon tea, the ability to clear any National Trust restaurant in seconds due to the mud, sweat, general road detritus is a skill which is unique to the cycling club.

We'll leave your Quinoa Salad alone if you can keep off my patch. Deal?

(**friends may also be too strong a word but they do let me glare at them with a smile on their face now).

The race of truth

2013-08-29T19:28:00.000+01:00

The time trial is probably one of the purest tests of cycling ability and fitness. The rider and bike against the clock of a set distance racing relatively against the rest of the field and also racing absolutely against previous best times or targets.

For me time trialling has been my focus from a competitive perspective. The ease of being able to simply turn up at a club evening "ten", pay my quid and see how I did helped ease me in to what has become something I have become gradually more competent and experienced at. Looking back on those early performances there are a number of pointers that are worth sharing which have been garnered through a mix of trial and error, experience and also observing others and refining things that work and cutting out things that do not. There are many aspects which can be attended to such as bike position, aerodynamics, which kit to use etc but let's focus on one of the basics - what actually is the time trial testing and how do you set a good foundation for everything else to be built upon?

The time trial is a test to see what speed you can average over a set distance, i.e. how much effort you can SUSTAIN consistently.

Let's consider some of the shorter distance events, i.e. 10 and 25 miles. Broadly speaking these events are the shorter "standard" race distances and are by far the most commonly promoted. The way a 25 is tackled may be a bit more conservative than the 10 but both of these tests need to be approached so that at the end, as you scream your number as you pass the time keeper you are basically spent. A way of thinking about this is that you need to get a feel for what your lactate threshold is. This is generally the point where your legs begin to burn as your body can no longer effectively process carbohydrates as energy and where lactic acid starts to accumulate in the blood stream. If you go out to hard you'll hit this point and essentially burn out. If you go out too slowly, you'll put in a less than optimal time against the clock.

Getting a sense for the threshold you can ride at is pretty key, experience helps as would a maximal heart rate or V02 Max test. I had one done at Birmingham University some time ago and the lab condition analysis confirmed my "gut feel" based on the use of a Polar HR monitor that my max HR was around 183bpm and that I could probably handle a 172-173bpm for an hour. This is a little bit of reverse engineering on my part but it did tally as the faster (sub-hour 25s I'd achieved saw me average around 170-174 bpm). So understanding your own capability is key in this respect.

The next thing to consider is what is the optimal pace to begin the TT at? Ideally you should get a solid, progressive 20-25 minute warm up so that you can elevate your pulse to a point where you are touching race pace but not going too deeply in to race mode. A roller or turbo are the most effective mechanisms. Sometimes it's impossible to do this so doing a series of hill climbs or sprints over 100-200m can help. If you get to the start line "cold" your body and brain will be in rebellion and will wonder what you are doing to them.

If you can imagine you have ten matches and that each lasts for 30 minutes, if you light them all in one go you won't light the room up. George Hincapie used this metaphor to state that you need to burn your effort evenly so that the room can stay lit. With the TT you need to be able to SUSTAIN your effort. Whatever you think it may be, take a note of your pulse or time and set that as a baseline. With interval training you can increase your capacity and recovery rate. If you can take notes of times and distances and HR or power outage (as is the current vogue) you can see how you progress.

Using a trip function on a GPS or bike computer is good too. I set my auto-lap for 2.5 miles. I can see four split times on my computer as I ride (the last being the finish) or nine plus one splits for 25 miles. The latter tend to be even more useful given the need to be more even with the matches being burnt. Sometimes courses are hilly in places or not uniform so the splits may not be "identical" when related to one another. Once you have ridden a set route though you should be able to have some baseline times for each segment of the course by which you can begin to draw comparison and target an improvement. Strava segments are an example. In our case though, the segment in totality is 10 or 25 miles long. So there is no point being "Mark Cavendish" in one section and "Driving Miss Daisy" in the remainder.

To round this note off, I'd also add that you have to think your way around the circuit as well as ride your way around. Mental stamina will keep you focused as at some point early (or later at times) in your ride you will want to get off and pack up. This may last a nanosecond or several minutes. It's not a bad thing, it means you are working hard and the body and mind are reconciling themselves for the task at hand. Build on this and move on. Several riders I know use a mantra or little internal dialogue which includes counting to four repeatedly or repeating "I can do this", "I am flying" etc.A steady, repetitive chant can help steady the cadence and tempo. When warming up, some up tempo tunes which you find motivational or moving also help. I've been using Sabotage by the Beastie Boys. I associate the baseline and rhythm with speed and aggression and that works for me. Next season it may be another tune, the important thing is that it works for me at the moment a it helps frame what I am going to do and because I associate it with previous strong performances it reinforces what I am thinking - that "I am going to ride well".

Managing the course is my final comment. The distances are 10 and 25 mile. Not 11 and 26. If you ride in a straight line between points of the course you'll be riding the distance. Too many riders wobble and bobble around in their early efforts. Try and minimise the distance covered. You cannot always take bends on the apex due to the roads being open but you can get your head up and focus on a point 100-200m ahead and ride to it. These little things as well as riding on the smoothest part of the road surface (the vitrified bits where the cars have smoothed things over) also help. Keep your head up always and be wary of pot holes which can wreck you front wheel.

Measure what you do. Keep measuring and comparing. Always think that there is scope to take 1-2 seconds per mile off your times. These small improvements add up to 10-20 seconds or 25-50 seconds over 10 and 25 miles.

Up, up and away

2013-08-02T20:00:00.003+01:00

The request for some pointers on climbing from Paul Dean popped up following my last post, so here goes. One of the common mistakes newcomers to cycling make is to confuse their new bicycle with an iron and by that I mean an iron which makes the landscape flat. Sadly, the chances are the roads and trails we all ride on a not flat. They may be flat in places but generally we will either be going up or going down. Even roads which you think are flat won't be, there will be some form of gradient however shallow. Generally anywhere outside of Norfolk or bits of Suffolk is going to have an incline. Let's break things down in to some manageable chunks.

Read the road
By "read the road" I mean look at the way the road ahead is shaping itself. Look at the horizon and how the road (or trail - these principles are equally valid off road too) fits in to the landscape. Even if you cannot see the road itself you can often see hedge lines and where trees or woods are split. Taking note of these things should help you anticipate where you are going to be in the five to ten minutes.

So from having an eye on the road we can then begin to anticipate what's in store for the brain, bike and body.

Anticipation
Getting a feel for the incline, decline or flat should allow you to think about your gear choice and cadence (how fast you spin the pedals in revolutions per minute). Spinning a lower gear at higher cadence will usually be more efficient than cranking a big gear at a slower rate although
there is a grey area where what may be deemed "small" or "big" gears may be hard to differentiate. If you are in doubt as to which gear you should be in though, err on the side of the smaller gear.

Try and find a gear which is comfortable to turn as you near the start of a hill.

Let's imagine we are going up the half-mile long climb from Gosmore to Preston you should have spotted where the road peaks and turns to the right (in to a wooded area) so you can now focus on the point you can see, get in to that comfortable gear and do the following:

stay in the saddle
focus on smooth and efficient pedalling
sit well back on the saddle to give traction to the back wheel but keep your torso forward
keep your trunk and arms strong
hold your bars at the widest part if you are on an MTB or place them on the hoods of your road bike (on top of the levers)

Where you see the road incline increase consider changing gear before you get to it. Changing when you get to such a point will stall you slightly and interrupt your rhythm. The other thing it can do is put stress on the rear mech. You will have heard people changing gear in such a fashion as it's like a misfiring Bren Gun as the chain clanks up the cassette.

Try and keep your chain as straight as you can. There is no point in riding on the 39T inner ring and having the chain stretched across to the 11T sprocket. The stress on the chain won't be good for the bike or you.

Power Rangers
Concentrating on the road and your position should allow you to be efficient in the way you apply your energy in to propelling you upwards. Ultimately you will be trying to balance the amount of power you can generate, without going in to oxygen debt (or blowing up), so as to get the combined mass of you and your bike upwards and forward. The power to weight ratio is pretty pivotal here so you may want to consider how you can reduce the mass of you and your bike - it will be cheaper for you to lose 8lbs than it will be to reduce that mass on the bike. Your credit card will only get you so far. The other thing to do is to increase the amount of power you can generate. This may mean doing some turbo training or weights work to get your quads and glutes a bit beefier. If you want to make climbing easier see that next bar of Dairy Milk or the packet of Hob Nobs as gravity's satanic helpers. Resist the temptation and have some fruit or a glass of water.

Think your way up
One comment I often hear is "I'm not really a good climber". If you go back to my earlier point about the nature of topography in the UK, you need to dispel that thought as you will need to be good at going up or at least improve as you get more miles in and develop your experience and knowledge. I like to "dial in" to a climb by visualising myself going up it quickly and lightly. And by lightly I try to think myself "light" and commit to picking a nice comfortable gear which I can firstly accelerate on and then settle down in to a nice flowing rhythm. As the road stretches out ahead it will also vary in its camber. If you visualise the road's profile the middle of the road may be higher than the gutters or sides. As the road bends these changes in gradient will also affect how you ride. Look at the gradient and pick the shallowest bit to ride. This may not be the shortest line around a corner or hairpin bend but it may well be the easiest.

Out of the saddle?
Sometimes you will have to get out of the saddle, this will tire you out more rapidly than being seated as your body will be elevated and your heart will need to work harder to get the oxygenated blood around. The advantage is that you can inject some pace or a kick to escape the bunch or deal with some technical surfaces. You won't be able to hold that position for too long but do remember to look forward, keep the torso forward and still keep the cadence smooth and flowing. As you begin to accelerate out of the saddle you may actually want to change gear up (to a bigger gear/ smaller sprocket) and then change back down 10-20 seconds later. That will depend on how strong you are and also what the road is like. Try it but do remember not to change the gear at the same time you pretend to be Chris Froome on the Ventoux. Change before and then attack.

Your upper core and arms will be in need of more control so keep steady. You may end up rocking from side to side if you are racing or time-trialling, in which case you should get a good grip on the bars so as to avoid sliding off the bike. When you are out of the saddle you can also generate a lot of torque which can lift the front wheel of the ground if you are in a small gear. This is essentially how you do a wheelie but unless you are Peter Sagan you may not want to create that effect. Good traction is delivered seated.

Ride your own ride
When on club runs or sportives there can be a temptation to follow someone else who looks like they are a keen climber. Unless you know that rider and know how you compare to them, don't. Ride within yourself and make sure you get to the top without your eyeballs popping out or your legs pinging with lactic acid. The Team Sky approach is a good example to follow. When attacked in the mountains by the Contadors and Quintanas, the Sky boys keep to their own pace. They tend to be driven more by Power Meters and Wattage but the principle is the same. James Gomm and I rode the Chiltern 100 earlier this year and saw the after affects of someone attempting to track us and attempt to drop us on a climb after 70 miles or so. Ironically that rider had "Rule #5 Applies" on his jersey. The irony was that it obviously didn't as he was crumpled in a heap as we pottered past him and onwards.

There's little point being the first person half way up the hill. Or even the first to the top and then watching the rest of the club sail past as you catch your breath. You need to remember that the hill is part of a wider landscape and to dial in to the fact that there will be some "flat" or "down" within a few minutes. There aren't too many big climbs in the UK so if you can get in to the practice of climbing effectively for 5-10 minutes you can then work on your speed.

Remember that what goes up has the joy of blasting down the other side with a grin on its face.

Peddling more advice

2013-07-29T21:53:00.002+01:00

When we learn to ride a bike, we don't. We learn how to not fall off. Because it hurts when you do. This is akin to hitting a dog everytime it barks in an attempt to cause an effect (silence in that case). Bark = Pain. Fall off bike = pain.

Although the ability to stay upright is not to be scoffed at, nobody *really* learns (emphasis) to ride their bike. It's something which we all tend to bimble along at. For those of us who grew up in an age where there were fewer TV channels, or indeed no TV channels, we used to go off and muck about on our Raleigh Grifters and the like and make up our own BMX tracks, jumps and berms and basically while away the hours larking around.

Having coached quite a number of Go-Ride sessions now I've noticed something. Adults are not very good at pedalling. I've noticed this during club runs and also observing people on the roads who are evidently coming in to the sport on the back of the Olympics and Britpack Tour de France victories which we are now becoming almost blase about.

The Go-Ride syllabus has several sessions which focus on the techniques relating to efficient and effective pedalling. I was given a "pedalling" session as part of my practical coaching assessment and I was really cheesed off at the time to get something so dull. Why not group riding in contact or high speed cornering? To dismiss pedalling technique as a trivial activity or something unglamarous is to be done so at your peril. Getting a group of kids to race against one another with half in their lowest gear and pedalling smoothly and at high cadence and the others using the biggest chainring and smallest sprocket, guess who wins every time? The spinners do every time.

Combine pedalling with correct gear choice and anticipation of terrain and you are going to be going faster sooner. Get these elements wrong and not only will you be going backwards in the bunch, you'll damage your knees and you'll also wear your kit and body down.

Good pedalling techniques involves good alignment of the ball of the foot in the centre of the pedal. This means keeping your knees in alignment with your feet, and your feet point forward. Have a look at your own feet, are the turning in or too close to the cranks? Tell tail scuff marks on a second hand Dura-Ace crankset I acquired tell me that the rider "didn't get on with them" because their heel was striking the crank and therefore their leg was point out. The pedal stroke should be even and fluid. Mashing the gear by pumping the lower leg up and down like a steam piston is not only ungainly, it's not effective. As one leg flows down, the other should be pulling up on the opposite side of the bike to counter balance things and convert potential energy in to kinetic energy on that next stroke. With some of the body's biggest muscles hanging off the backside and thighs it makes sense that these muscle groups need to be put to good effect so try and imagine a beautiful flowing cyclic action which has its basis at the pelvis and sees the knee form the centre of an arc with the ankle forming the lower point.

The final thing to consider is saddle height, a bit like Goldilocks and the bear's porridge the height needs to be just right. Too high and the leg will stretch and you will be in pain due to overextending the muscles and tendons in the knee and quads. Too low and you'll see your knees smash in to your elbows as well as look like a numpty. With the cycling shoe heel resting on the flat of one of the pedals at its lowest point (the 6 o'Clock position) your leg should be just shy of being fully extended. You may find that one leg is longer than the other in which case you'll need to make some small adjustments but the principle still holds. You may want to get the tape measure out to record the centre (of pedal) to a directly extended line at the crest of your saddle. Scribble that down and keep a record as it'll help if you need to take a seatpost out or if you swap a saddle at a later date.

There's more to pedalling than you may think. Ask yourself how much of the above you have taken for granted and then ask yourself how smootly you are pedalling. On a turbo trainer, try clipping in with one leg and restrict yourself to a few minutes pedalling with just your right then just your left leg. That'll give you the answer you are looking for.

Happy pedalling.

plus ça change

2013-07-21T13:28:00.004+01:00

It was over nine years ago when I last rode a time trial on the F1/25 course which is based around Tempsford. Today I broke my duck as I competed with fellow Nomads, James Gomm and Nick Hickman in the Verulam CC 25 mile time trial. Some things have changed for the better but some aspects of time trialling on this particular course and this particular HQ are unspoilt by progress. In some ways it felt like a lycra-clad version of Life on Mars as I time travelled back a decade, some of the same faces filled the Stuart Memorial Hall in almost exactly the same spot they'd been left in 2004 (or prior) and some of the same features have persisted.

In no particualr order these include:

- The Max Wall lookalike from the [Name of Club witheld] Road Club rolling around on the floor as though he was the focus of some form of slow motion exorcism. It wasn't a pretty sight. I'm sure Chris Froome doesn't have to dodge the slowly flayling limbs of humanity's least congruous cyclists.

- The aroma of the early start, which Nigel Tooke oft recites as a "melange of faeces and embrocation". He's not wrong, that's exactly what it is.

- The pensive gaze of the organiser as riders breach the "no cleats" on the floor rule.

- The inordinately long queue for the single lavatory, made worse by the steel wool which is provided by the Hall owners to remove any collateral damage from the post-colonic evacuation which is inevitable given the mass arrival of 100 blokes who have driven quite some distance at five in the morning.

- The demand for hot water and tea outstripping the supply capabilities of the single water heater.

Experience is a good teacher though and as a responsible ~~and caring~~ Club Captain I had informed my teammates of what to expect.

We could not really legislate for the cathartic Yoga experience but we could at least walk around it. The way to deal with the olfactory assault was to avoid being in the HQ other than to sign on and retrieve a racing number. Being armed with a roll of Andrex Aloe Vera soft toilet roll was also a boon. I'd like to see Cyclist Magazine or Urban Cyclist do a review of "Which Bog Roll?". No doubt a Rapha Loganberry infused Tartan Ar5ewipe would win the "shoot out". And "shoot out" was a good description of my own private battle with the ladies' loo as my pre-travel coffee worked its magic. That's right, the ladies' loo is the "in place" if you want to avoid a queue. It's also pink which is easier on the eye and it doesn't have an open guttered urinal. Fortunately there are few women time triallists so it's fair to say that I was simply using the resources available so as to prevent the flush handle in the gents' from being over-used. And yes, I did leave it in a clean state. Well, clean for a bloke.

The HQ does have some new cupboard doors but other than that, it has hardly changed at all. And it's probably not changed since 1953 let alone 2003.

The racing is merely the filling in the sandwich, three of us PB'd but the post-ride car park was full of the usual cliches and excuses about the "wrong tyre", "doing a road ride last week too hard", "the wind being Nordic and not Baltic", "one's biorhythms not being aligned to the phase of the moon" and so on. Similarly the range of post-exercise recovery nutrition still features Nescafe Gold Blend instant and Tesco Value Victoria Sponge (50p per slice). A see of middle-aged/ elderly and portly men with clipboards and startsheets waving betting shop pens as though they were at the press conference at the end of the Tour De France also adds to the atmosphere. The amount of squinting at the results board signals that the riders and results junkies are getting older and more longsighted (I'm sure the writing is much smaller).

I found the experience to be wholly rewarding. Given that both Nick and James are relative newcomers to the whole "Tempsford experience" I felt like I'd taken them to visit an elderly, scarcely sane relative just to show them that indeed Aunt Agatha is as mad as a box of frogs. Plus they got to use the team loo roll.

Here's to revisitng Tempsford in 2023.

Look what he did

2013-07-15T22:04:00.000+01:00

Lewis Hamilton has won the British Grand Prix after competing in 14 other Grand Prix in the previous fortnight. The press were keen to express that this was an impossibility and his tyres must have been pumped up with some magical air which transcends the laws of physics. Driving round in circles and then having to then hump one of the Pussy Cat Dolls or The Saturdays or someone else equally vapid must be tough though, so don't think driving in circles isn't tricky.

Andy Murray has also hit some balls over a net and this is deemed a gargantuan achievement, especially as in one game the ball boy didn't give him his Wimbledon branded towel to mop his mono-brow between points. To be fair, it is a tough game that Tennis. Some of the games last a couple of hours and involve some really high intensity grunting and on one occasion the Robinson's Barley water was a bit tart to say the least.

So Froome wins on the Ventoux, one of the starkest, toughest climbs in professional cycling after defending the yellow jersey for several days and the accusation is "he must have been on the juice." On a day which sees two of athletics' top sprinters test positive, the innuendo gathers pace. Sadly he is paying for the sins of his fathers and lazy journalism.

"It's sad that we're sitting here the day after the biggest victory of my life talking about doping." Chris Froome.

A cyclist rides up a hill.... Froome sticks it to the peloton.

The strength in depth of British cycling is embarrassingly good. But somehow we just can't accept that at last Britain is good at something. Not just good but really good. And for once the "something" is something other than getting on a plane from Luton to Marbella and then demanding "I waaaaaaant Hammo, Eggo and Chippos you [insert racist insult]! I came here on a plane you bast@rd." Although this is something that we excel at as a nation (plus the added bonus of getting sunburned within two minutes of any sighting of solaris. It's not something we should be particularly proud of (except in ~~Essex~~ some parts of the UK (n.b. Phin Wenlock complained about this bit but he is from Dorset or somewhere anyway but I like him and have recanted), where this is actually viewed as a rite of passage akin to a Victorian "Grand Tour").

The national dish.

To prove the point about the depth of GB talent, Cavendish has hit 25 TdeF stage wins, Pete Kennaugh has achieved super-domestique status in his first TdeF and Geraint Thomas and Ian Stannard have kept pushing on despite injuries which would even make Ray Wilkins sober up rapidly.

Is the reason Froome isn't getting the plaudits a question of timing? Some people have stood around in a field in Nottinghamshire having their Cricket game littered with a series of cucumber sandwiches, tea and occasional sunbathing getting more column inches? Is it because Cesc Fabregas may join Everton United this week? Who knows...

All I know is that Chris Froome won a stage of the world's hardest race, on Bastille Day, in France, in the Centenary edition being chased down by two former winners (~~the disgraced~~ Alberto Contador and ~~the spent~~ 2011 winner Cadel Evans). This is the equivalent of a Frenchman flying a Spitfire over Trafalgar Square after having created the fuel biologically by drinking Kentish ale and urinating in out in to the FA Cup, decanting it in to the fuel tank whilst singing Jerusalem and wearing a Union Jack waistcoat.

Would that go down well in the Olde Bulldog on the Benidorm Strip? I think not.

Maybe "Froomo" should grow some sideburns and profess a knowledge of The Jam's back catalogue? That's not a jibe at Wiggins but it is a tily at lazy reporting and the tendency to report on matters of style and not substance. It merited 100 words in the Metro, no doubt Froomo will not win BBC's Sport's Personality of the Year as ~~Virginia Wade~~ Andy Murray has finally won a UK "slam". At least Froome has a personality. Having said that Lendl will be coach of the year no doubt based on his charismatic and engaging media campaign this year... oh no hang on a second.

Maybe Froome should simply "stick it" to the rest of the field in the last week of the Tour and make the race his own. No one is going to touch him for several years if he maintains this form and approach. Indurain, Merkcx, Fignon, Hinault, Froome - a good club to be in.

He's back! And this time he's really got a spleen to vent - Urban Toss

2013-07-10T19:33:00.002+01:00

Over the last year I have spent a lot of time working on the Hitchin Nomads CC blog. And jolly good fun that has been. So far I think we are pushing somewhere between 45,958 unique page views, which for little ole Hitchin Nomads is great. Of the local cycling clubs, the Noddies' site is probably the most frequently updated, down with the kids and generally informative. Well, that's what people say.*

*That's what Nigel Wilson says and he's the authority on these things as far as we need be concerned.

Having ~~suckered~~ roped new Nomad, Steve Austin (he of splendid Mud, Sweat and Tyres blog fame) in to helping with the Nomads' site, I have a spare nanosecond to proffer my own musings.

To open my 2013 account I'll start with my initial observations on "new" cycling magazines. And one in particular. To a degree, anything which promotes cycling to the reading public is a good thing. But sometimes the narrative is onanistic to say the least. Typical articles include but are not confined to:

Which carbon fibre inner tube cap is best?
Get that courier look! (exclamation mark essential)
Riding to Ulan Bator on a custom built steel tourer! (goatee beards and exclamation marks essential)
Super bike review (lowest price similar to national debt of Cyprus)

In plain English these articles can be translated in turn to:

You are a nob.
You don't know you are a nob but will become a giant one by aspiring to ride a bike with coloured wheel rims and curating a fetid body odour.
You are a nob but at least you might leave the country for a while as a result of being inspired by some hippy. You will hopefully be abducted on the Silk Road and sold to the local tribesmen as raw ingredients for a nice broth. Plus you will have a steel bike that has been made by a man in a shed in Bristol with his redundancy money from Aldi. Undoubtedly it will be called Trevcycle or Bazwerks.
You can't ride a bike quickly but are confident your ability will increase simply by racking up a huge credit card bill/ divorce or both. Typically you will be a 4th Cat rider who gets dropped on every race on the first lap.

Or, in summary, you think Rapha clothing really is the bee's knees and that Nespresso is similarly great.

My good friend and fellow pedant/ ubercynic, Paul Riley, has just ~~invested~~ wasted a whole six English Euros Dollars on a copy of Urban Cyclist. He could have spent the money on Jaffa Cakes for his excellent water emporium. But no. He was drawn in like a sailor to the Sirens on the rocks by the promise of new knowledge and insight. Was this wonga well spent? Let's see shall we?

The following feature header, "Smashing Good Show" which as it indicates is:

"...a joyful celebration of a bygone age, inviting cyclists to dress up and enjoy city cycling as it once was..."

Promises to deliver the gen. But does it?

So what could that mean? I expect the author and also the editor thought that this would be akin to a Jules Verne epic which would incite the cycling nation to run to Hackett's, purchase a Berwick Tweed, batter a blind person andthen nab their golden retriever (or black labrador if possible) and then attempt to shoot some local peasantry.

Over the past 20-50 years many manufacturers have been at pains to create clothes and kit that isn't tweed. Because it is not a good idea to ride a bike in the equivalent of a National Service army blanket.

So what next in the Urban Cyclist agenda? Up the Alps in Hessian sacks a la mode of the leper colony of ancien Guadaloupe? Which doublet should I wear whilst fitting carrying my sackbut and hedrygurdy on a club run? Can I still joust and tilt a lance whilst cycling a Raleigh Grifter?

So as you can see, this is an idea based in a universe where city cycling was once deemed to be both idyllic and fun.

But which city could that be? Which famed civitae and cyclotropolis? Was this a city where the streets were paved with gold wherein Dick Whittington would give you a rub down at the end of a heady commute to the flange-nut factory? No.

Was this a city where there were no horses or associated droppings/ trams/ urchins/ horse drawn carriages/ horseless carriages/ hover cars like in the Jetsons/ white vans etc. No.

Is this a city which exists within a 300 metre radius of West Hampstead? Yes.
Is this a city in which everyone is called Giles, Rupert or Betina where a Trust Fund is de riguer? Yes.
Is this a city which is conveniently linked to the "country" by the use of a Bentley and driver? Yes.
Is this a city where I want to live? No.

It would probably be called Tw@tville cum Spanner.

So in the alternative universe of "Bikie Cyclist" the basis of the article would be as thus:

Smashing Good Show - some fools with too much money sit outside a bandstand drinking Pimms gazing in to the middle distance as the staff photographer takes close-up shots of their over engineered frame lugs (whilst wishing he'd studied harder and got a job on Nuts magazine or at least Which Hi-Fi).

At this point Paul Riley is brought in to inform the participants that this shoot is to be re-themed along the lines of the Hunger Games and is actually now a fight to the death on Primrose Hill.

Several of the participants are subsequently impaled on or gaffer-taped to Bromptons which are then folded up and thrown in to the Regent's Park Canal (victims preferably still alive). Other "survivors" are similarly skewered on Rapha Condor seatposts and the like and made to lick jam of the tire sidewalls of Boris Bikes.

The "winner" is then forced to have a presta valve fitted to the side of his/ her head which is then pumped up to circa140 PSI using a Victorian fire engine pump.

At some point the ""winner's" head eventually explodes but not before the opportunity to fit in a consumer test of "cycling helmets of the 1960s" is performed by smashing them in situ (on the "winner's" noggin) with a mattock.

Two for the price of one.

Now that is a "Smashing Good Show" I would pay £6 to read about.

Who is the dope?

2012-10-22T17:26:00.001+01:00

A year ago yesterday I pinned on a time trial number for what was potentially the last throw of the dice in my competitive cycling career. Assuming that a career can be described as loitering around the village halls of eastern England on cold Sunday mornings.

I'd stopped riding in 2006(ish) due to the cumulative factors of time poverty due to family and work commitments plus I had become increasingly annoyed by the issue of doping in the top-flight of the sport. And it's the latter which is the topic for this post.

The relationship between cycling and chemical assistance has been a curious one: one which led me to hang up my bikes for a few years too. I'd grown tired of reading of young cyclists dying in their sleep for no reason; of someone being busted for EPO; of champions accidentally eating contaminated food and so it goes. I don't have time for cheats and they are not good role models for my kids.

Ignoring the issue was the main thrust of the governing bodies for too long. I've never done it nor sought to do it as I don't have the pressure or talent or lack of integrity to entertain it. But others have and may still do. There will always be cheats in any walk of life. But why do it?

Following the Second World War, cycling was viewed as a means of re-establishing the new Europe and also a way of demonstrating national prowess as well as illustrating that there was sufficient infrastructure to allow a nation state to to host a Grand Tour (in France, Italy and to a lesser extent Spain). The pressures on riders grew and the demands of these epic races grew to Herculean levels. The availability of cheap amphetamines and a less than qualified approach to medical science led to the perfect storm whereby riders could no longer compete on "pain et l'eau" alone. Any biography of Anquetil, Simpson, Coppi etc attests to these themes. I think I have read nearly every book on cycling that Amazon sells and there is consistency in the stories told; a little bit of speed is fine; these tablets will help you recover. But respect the omerta. Keep it in the family and it will all be fine. Don't piss in to the tent like Paul Kimmage or you'll be ostricised.

As I began to take up the sport more seriously in the late 1990s and early 2000s I had little appreciation of the history and metier. As I developed my love for the sport and the hatred of the training, I did improve my knowledge of who was riding, what the events were all about and began to supplement my education which had been gained by watching Channel 4's coverage of the Tour de France in the 80s and further advanced by old copies of my father in law's Cycling Weekly. Indurain, Lemond, Fignon, Kelly, Roche, Cipollini, Robert Millar all riders I respected. Incidentally Kelly was ruled out of a position with Team Sky as he would have failed their zero tolerance policy for convicted dopers).

As the shadow of doping grew I was at least satisfied that Lance Armstrong was a paragon of what could be achieved through science, determination and sheer will-power and bloody mindedness. "There's no way he's doping, anyone who has been through cancer wouldn't be some stupid. He's an inspiration, if he doped then cycling would be finished". These were my own words on more than one occasion when asked by non-cycling friends. "Oh come on, he must be."

"No way." I'm not that into the pro-cycling scene but that would be a bridge too far.

I recall leering at David Millar as he warmed up at the London Grand Depart in 2007 near Whitehall and muttering to friends what a total fraud he was for stealing the World Time Trial championship (he was convicted of doping following the Cofidis affair).

Armstrong is above this.

He's different. I've seen him ride in France several times, he is carrying a generation on his shoulders and on the Champs Elysee he carries the chants of "U-S-A", the French would have a field day if he fell from grace and what about his cancer charity and foundation. That alone would keep him honest. He's never tested positive, he's been screened more than any other athlete...

As the UCI ruled in concordance with USADA today, the writing is now on the wall. The lack of defence is deafening. The USADA case against Armstrong is more or less exclusively based on circumstantial evidence and affidavits, there isn't much forensic evidence at all, certainly not enough to force the stripping of seven Tour de France victories. But the testimonies and lack of rebuttal have seen Icarus's wings melt. There may be some compelling defence on the horizon but it will lack credibility and history is already being revised.

The heroes now are people like David Millar, his book is candid and honest and the context and challenges that he articulates go some way to explain how rank and toxic the pro-sport was. The future is now down to people like Wiggins, Cavendish, Stannard, Froome, Thomas and the other "products" of the British Olympic programme that was set up by Peter Keen (World Class Performance Plan maestro) and which lives on in the through the BC Academy, Team Sky and UK Sport. The Tour of 2012 may be the first clean race for a generation, there may be even a BW and AW suffix for the historians to adopt, i.e. cycling Before Wiggins and After Wiggins. In the UK we are lucky that we have been on the margins previously but now we are at the forefront of the development and progression of cycling. I'm disgusted that the UCI have been weak in policing the sport but I'm sure that the generation of talent we have now (and the next one) can demonstrate more integrity than "generation-EPO".

The infamous Charlton Hillclimb courtesy of Neil Fraser 21/10/12 - I did refuel on Young's Best Bitter but that's as chemical as my training gets.

My next post will be on more deserving matters as I work out what next year's goals are going to be.

Briercliffe averages

2012-08-27T13:32:00.001+01:00

My fastest four 10s around the Briercliffe circuit for 2012 are:

24.18
24.37
25.08
25.37

Giving an average time of 24.55 which equates to 24.09 mph. Ironically, the two "25s" were ridden at the very start of the season and the two "24s", right at the end. That'll teach me to break bones.

What countryside?

2012-08-08T19:20:00.002+01:00

Well it is certainly one question. I am feeling rather melancholic as I have ridden my last Briercliffe 10 TT for the season. The last event is next week and I won't be around so that's that for another year. I always think I enjoy riding around the Southill course more than I do. Partly as I feel transported back to a part of England that still has globes that are mostly covered in pink countries (the old Commonwealth for you younger readers) and partly as it is as twee as a Wind in the Willows character in a Harris Tweed suit, smoking a pipe and listening to Elgar whilst sat in a leather chair in a Gentleman's Club.

The actuality of life in 2012, is that I invariably spend 25 minutes plus staring at tarmac and/ or avoiding badly driven Vauxhall Astras, pick-up trucks and the likes that are bombing around the villages near Old Warden.

But that dispels the idyllic view of Elysian Fields and the brief escape from the slings and arrows of modern life.

In fact on most time trials I can't recall much of the scenery. Assuming there is some. There's not much on the A1 for sure. Unless you count dead badgers, discarded porno' mags (some of which get collected by some time keepers I know) and pot noodle cartons. There are always porno mags on the F1 course, once you see one it is like the Sixth Sense with Bruce Willis. Or it could just be me. "I see rude bits"....

Going around the Ashwell F14/12 course at a mere 20mph with Andy Herbert a few weeks ago at least provided me with the opportunity to see what some bits of Guilden Morden and Wrestlingworth actually look like. Apparently there are houses, a church, shops....

The fields around Pirton and Meppershall.

Not too many opportunities like this arise but I'll take what I can. The other night I managed to get out for a gentle spin and actually did marvel at the landscape for a few moments. I love the rolling countryside near Pirton, Meppershall, Sharpenhoe etc. It may not be the most stunning but it allows my (simple) brain to switch off for a short period at least.

There'll be plenty of time for staring at fields and cottages in the off season, but for now I have the Beds Road CC 10 to have a crack at tomorrow. I like the BRCC set up as their Club House is another (welcomed) throw back to simpler times. Hopefully I'll do a short 25 or better to boot.

Pip Pip!

Is it me? No, it bl00dy isn't but I'll take this for the team.

2012-08-06T22:29:00.000+01:00

So Jamie Staff MBE and I are both baldies with glasses. Makes a pleasant change to be mistaken for a former Team GB sprint gold medallist as opposed to the host of TV Burp.

Me talking to Jake Humphrey at the Velodrome.


Me coaching the USA track squad.

Jamie Staff at the HNCC Open 25.

Staff coaching Pendleton(?) quite some time ago.