Bitter/Sweet

Fika

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Fri, 13 May 2016 22:42:00 +0000

I am exhausted

with convincing myself

that that the content of this black tea

will be enough to sustain my day

or even that one cup

of you is enough.

Be something more

than my morning coffee

like the bitter-sweetness

of the early afternoon

accompanied with deep breaths,

the type that you take

when you finally feel content.

Life

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 14 Mar 2016 22:50:00 +0000

All my leaves have

fallen at my feet,

a tree

dry and brittle

but there are nests

in these branches,

proof that life

is merely a season

away.

Untitled (Intentionally)

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Sun, 13 Mar 2016 20:27:00 +0000

Can I take your insecurities

and fuck them

how they were meant to be?

Can I use them up

until they shiver? They can

tell me to stop

but not mean it.

They can scratch against

my back - I'll like it.

I will elicit a response

and cradle your

I wish I was better

until it comes out of you

and into me. Let me taste

your inner hesitancy. Let me

digest it into something else,

like a better sense of self,

like a fuller version of me.

Trust Falls

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Sat, 27 Feb 2016 20:13:00 +0000

It is the most

frightening trust fall:

being surrounded

by trees that shade

with resentment,

poison ivy crawling

up satin like sheltering,

cold nights spent

in my own skin.

I have been falling

into myself, wondering

the moment my strength

cannot catch me.

Light Me

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 22 Feb 2016 08:35:00 +0000

Chemistry is

a book of matches.

Friction

creates a flame

that only lasts

until a breath too heavy.

But what can light me

that is not temporary?

No Easy Exit

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 22 Feb 2016 08:30:00 +0000

There will never be

exit signs illuminated

in my eyes.

I crumble

like the walls of Jericho

when you leave;

it tends to be

the promise land

without me.

Love Me

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Fri, 18 Dec 2015 04:38:00 +0000

like you loved your first
car with the dents
and rust and windows
that don't roll up or down,
stuck in one place and on some
days, just the right place.

like that stray mutt
that doesn't leave you alone
ever since you made

the mistake of feeding it.

like autumn
even if it gets cold because

of that sweater you always wear

that some people tell you is ugly.

imperfectly

timelessly.

Lunar Man

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Tue, 15 Dec 2015 09:39:00 +0000

He stands next to me

our arms brushing

like many summer nights

on the same white picketed porch.

He points out how the moon's

brightness matches December's

briskness. I turn slightly away

to view

and I see him

and the man of craters mirroring

each other. I wonder

if he now sees himself

like I do:

illusive, yet so fucking real

for those who went through

space and stars

to land there.

Enlightened

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Fri, 11 Dec 2015 09:23:00 +0000

I desperately

consume understanding

because you are a

psychedelic metaphor

I struggle to comprehend.

Can we walk barefoot

even in the gravel

to feel everything

like it was intended?

I craved a travel partner

and this trip

confirms your perfection:

a sober mystery,

but I am enlightened.

Temporary Affection

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Tue, 08 Dec 2015 06:03:00 +0000

This must be

how tree branches feel

about strong winds

moving them

to the point of breakage

yet never committing

to being a hurricane

that will carry

them: limbs, bark,

trunk and roots -

until the end.

I Know

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 16 Nov 2015 07:59:00 +0000

rock bottom by

the scrapes on my knees

from falling for your apprehension

after tripping over

your ambiguity.

I should have let

the scabs fall off

before picking myself apart

because a part

of me loves

that scoffing mentality

and pretending you know me,

but worst, that I do not

know you.

Clown

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Sun, 15 Nov 2015 03:15:00 +0000

You make me a clown

and I juggle

for your entertainment.

The downside of being

a performer is that you

like me more with the stage

makeup on. What if

I dropped the act

and held just this emotion

so tightly that it embodied

into something

other than a rubber ball

bouncing in my stomach?

Would I still be something

to watch or should I expect

the crash of circus tents

to be the end of me?

Moth vs Butterfly

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Sat, 14 Nov 2015 01:25:00 +0000

When a man compliments

me I feel

like a moth

and chew through myself

while waiting to see

how long it takes

for him to notice the colors

of a butterfly.

Misunderstandings

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Tue, 10 Nov 2015 05:15:00 +0000

You mistook me

for a solution

and when I could

not be anything

other than myself

you made me to be

a mistake.

I mistook you

as you a solution

and when you were

nothing but yourself

I believed briefly

I understood;

my mistake.

Severed

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Wed, 28 Oct 2015 15:09:00 +0000

She has good hair

on her head

and a good head

on her shoulders

but sometimes

it disconnects

severed by feeling

that her mistake

was failing to use

her heart in a way

that didn't use her up.

Coping

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Thu, 24 Sep 2015 02:23:00 +0000

Feed me the truth

at places with

white tablecloths

where they serve

the type of wine

that tastes like

coping.

Chilled

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Thu, 24 Sep 2015 02:11:00 +0000

I am cold

like water

solidifying

to ice.

Did you think

I wouldn't

turn to a brick

after being

chilled time

and time again?

Homesick

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Tue, 22 Sep 2015 01:52:00 +0000

You:

in the way

I miss the smell

of rain goosebumped

across evergreens

like how I breathe

in when I consume

waterfalls

like how I breathe

out when waterfalls

consume me

for the reason

that rose gardens

are full of thorns

yet so many colors.

Dark Spots

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 14 Sep 2015 01:16:00 +0000

If I wrote

a final goodbye note

I would indicate

to everyone (no one)

how I was insignificant

anyways.

Mascara

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 14 Sep 2015 01:16:00 +0000

I waste a lot of money

on expensive mascara

that ends up staining

my pillow cases

Submission

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 14 Sep 2015 01:15:00 +0000

With my hands tied

behind my back

I actually relaxed

and let someone else

think.

Do I get to breathe?

The choice is not mine;

I only wanted a warm

body to console me

but the control in your eyes

takes me away too.

Reminiscing

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Wed, 09 Sep 2015 03:06:00 +0000

It's odd that I only talk to you on things

like your birthday

but I still know that you're

napping right now,

you'll be up in about 30 minutes

to drive to places

still sleepy eyed,

your contacts dry,

needing that extra extra coffee

which you won't have time to get

because you're alway 5 minutes late.

I know you don't think of me

but I bet you think

of that coffee and wish you

had someone to grab it for you

once again.

Sleeping Alone

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Tue, 01 Sep 2015 02:05:00 +0000

I'm resting my head

with dignity,

cuddling with honesty,

and fucking the shit

out of self respect.

If you question if this is

poetry you might know little

about loving your

goddamn self.

Compatibility

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Wed, 15 Jul 2015 16:45:00 +0000

We share common ground

both knowing

that feeling

of the surface

falling

from underneath us.

Allergies

noreply@blogger.com (Tsionah N) — Mon, 13 Jul 2015 01:37:00 +0000

I have sadness

like allergies

and you agitate

this condition.

Even a slight,

fleeting interaction

makes my eyes

like lakes

and my skin

starts crawling.

You have this way

of making me

grossly abnormal.