Bliz-O-Vision

Uberclass

2016-02-03T01:23:00.000-04:00

Well, there goes the world. What happens when your's truly teams up with his best buddies to unleash a barrage of youtube fury?

Yes, it's true, Uberclass is a new thing for you to feast your eyes on. Actually, as of this very moment, we've been running for a year on Youtube. You can find the channel here.

Here is a list of a few of my favorite things of our first year of Uberclass. Let's lead off with our YEAR 1 trailer.

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The Last of Us (PS3, 2013)

2013-09-06T05:12:00.001-03:00

Oh boy... Naughty Dog really has a thing with knocking me on my ass with their games. After playing last years arguable Game of the Year: The Walking Dead (Not the shitty FPS based off the shitty show), I certainly didn't think I'd need to play anything zombie like again any time soon. Especially, a game where you're a character who has a shady past and you find a young girl and try to escort her safely across the country without her being eaten by zombies, cannibals or bandits. When I think of it, these two games are very similar in many ways. Yet, somehow, I have found myself going back to both of them separately for another playthrough.

While The Walking Dead carried a great deal of heart and adapted to how you played to give you a different outcome, I think I preferred The Last of Us for leaving us no options. The only options you really have along the way are how you're gonna deal with remarkably dangerous situations. Do you walk up to the infected with your fists-a-swingin' or do you instead gun them down. The different types of enemies really find ways to make both an option and potentially a disadvantage. For one thing, you really have barely any ammo in this game.

THAT'S BECAUSE THIS IS AN HONEST TO GOODNESS SURVIVAL HORROR GAME!!!!

Every decision you make is very important. If you use a bullet, you need it to count or else your chances of survival just dropped drastically. You may even find that experience to be stressful and scary.

I recall seeing media getting quite upset due to the excited audience reaction to some of the extreme violence in this game. Make no mistakes, this game is seriously brutal. Yes somehow, it always manages to carry a weight. When I kill someone, it's because I needed to, or I would die. As Joel, the main protagonist (of sorts) puts it, "It's him or me". It somehow brings you in and has you make the decision that it isn't gonna be you. Sometimes, you'll sneak up behind someone and grab them by the throat and start choking out, and what follows is hardly what gaming usually gives us. Instead of the victim exploding into coins and having a japanese voice shout from off screen "GREAT JOB", you find yourself listening to them beg for their lives. You start to second guess yourself. You wonder if you could just let them go and make a deal, however, every single time I found myself finishing them and begrudgingly continuing along. Of course, none of these emotions would be felt without the great acting that Naughty Dog is known for putting into their games.

The acting in this game is remarkable. It's subtle. It's a truly evolved way of playing a game, in fact. Where as before, you would have an exposition moment where one character would say they are sad, you instead see the character make a subtle facial expression change. These people have seen a lot, especially when you take into account the beginning of the game, where you experience the initial infection from a much less gruff Joel, who up to that point was living a life like anyone else.

The game has characters that you can relate to, whether you want to or not, and the ending result is that you find yourself playing for keeps. You find yourself, having been there and done it all before, but trying to protect the one pure thing that you've found along the way. Ellie is in many ways the opposite of Joel. She's a wise cracker with an imagination and a really unique curiosity for the world that we all take for granted. She was born after the infection, and the masters at Naughty Dog know what she will make you feel and seem to make Joel feel the same way about things. It's really interesting. I'm also pleased with how they avoided cliches in this story. It's not like she just shows Joel that hope overcomes all, so much as Joel finds something comforting about her hope and will do anything to protect her. All I can say for sure is that, when I'm playing as Joel, you better not mess with Ellie, 'cause I get Batman levels of grumpy.

I've tried to avoid spoilers as best as I could, so do understand that there was a lot I didn't talk about, but I can't recommend it enough. I also want to avoid overhyping as that is a very real threat. Just get this game and have fun with it (yeah, it's fun too. Not just emotionally draining).

I also need to mention that the multiplayer on this game is actually a lot of fun. It eventually gets old, but all multiplayer does for me eventually. This was one of the best and most interesting I've ever played.

Game of the year? Possibly. The year isn't over yet.

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

2012-07-26T14:22:00.003-03:00

The Dark Knight Rises was a perfect movie. There wasn't a single mistake. I put some spoilers cause I was so excited about how great this perfect movie was!

Chris Nolan used his signature subtlety to a whole new level, going as far as to put in flashbacks to the previous movies every time something is mentioned. I also love how natural the dialogue is. Never does anyone sink to our level by sounding like someone you'd meet in the streets. That just wouldn't be Gotham. Instead we get dialogue with forced subtext at all times. This really works for the movie because it adds to the realistic tone.

I've heard Chris Nolan described as the smartest kid in the class who is no fun to be around. I don't know what they're talking about. Based on the dialogue in this movie, I imagine he'd be really entertaining to be around. I assume that he would squeeze in contextual yet unfunny jokes in every 5 or so minutes to make sure that all of the normal people (like you and me) don't get bored. He would say things that sound smart, yet are really easy to understand, over and over again in an effort to make really challenged people understand and everyone else feel really smart for having figured it out a while before.

I'm really happy with the direction Nolan opted to take this series. In the first one he only made a few changes to Batman's persona and mythos, but by the time the Dark Knight came around, he decided to show us that Batman is a lame character and made him into something really awesome. I especially loved how Batman tackled Two Face to death before falling the same distance, stretching for a minute and riding off on a motorcycle while Gordon talked to his son in a completely believable way. In the Dark Knight Rises, we finally get to see the end of Batman.... NOLAN STYLE!

At the beginning of the movie, Batman quit for the past 8 years and hasn't been seen in action since he killed Two Face and overheard Gordon's speech about him being the cities dark knight because he can take it. I think Batman overheard Gordon's speech because it's realistic to theorize that Batman couldn't handle the pressure of all of that responsibility. Others say that Batman quit because of Rachel Dawes' death, and that makes total sense too, because she was such a beloved character who always talked with great charm and knew how to make Bruce Wayne smile. Seriously, whenever either actress playing Rachel Dawes was on the screen in the first two, I'd see the whole audience smiling and cheering for her great dialogue about justice and injustice...and justice. She even had that hilarious line about how Gotham's DA is always being shot at. I sure was sad that she wasn't in this movie...but I digress, I've gotten off topic. Anyway, Batman quit...cause that makes sense.

Now he's a smelly old guy who walks with a cane, locked up in his new mansion with a bunch of pictures and things (including his mothers pearl necklace, which he must have put in his pocket before leaving the burning Wayne Manor in Batman Begins...after repairing it...and putting a tracking device in it). For a while he has a real fun accent but soon enough he just goes back to the same voice he had in the other movies.

Bane is really cool in this movie. Having barely seen him in comic books such as Knightfall and Vengeance of Bane...and Secret Six...and Suicide Squad, it was really nice to learn what Bane's character is like. First off he has telepathic powers that send his voice directly to your ears. This is really useful for him if he's hiding in the dark, because you can't follow the voice to find him. I really like the way Sean Connery played him in this film, with an excellent physique that is truly intimidating. This totally makes up for League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. I also really like the way they stuck to his origin in the comics, where he was born and raised in a South American prison. I love the subtle nod to his comic book origin, with him being in a prison and meeting someone who was born and raised in a prison.... in India... while he is a white british guy (or whatever accent he's going for here). They also do a great job of showing how much of a badass leader Bane is. He's smart and calculating and can't be told what to do by anyone... until someone makes him cry and tells him what to do. I'm not gonna spoil who tells him what to do, but I'll give you a hint. Look for the worst acting you've ever seen on film and it's that person...

Anyway, what was I saying again? Oh yeah, this movie is perfect. Forget what I said about that bad acting character. They did a great job. There was even a part within 5 minutes of that character revealing that they were actually the big villain all along where they instantly die. The performance of this scene was so realistic it made several people in the theatre start laughing. Some people have interesting ways to deal with their sadness. You think that's the only big shocking twist ending? Hell no. Nolan is no slouch! He vowed with this movie he would put in more endings than Lord of the Rings: Return of the King.

I especially love the big twist with the character of John Blake where he finds out his real name. It's great because this gesture just shows me that Nolan knows about the comic books existence, but it still reminds me that comic books are stupid and Nolan is better than that. It's weird I didn't mention John Blake until now. It's almost like his character didn't really do anything in the movie but fill in a spot that was needed, but never fleshed out. I probably feel that way because it's been a few days since I've seen this masterpiece. We do at one point see him barely beat up one guy. Maybe he could be the next Batman (I know the answer, but I don't want to spoil it for you). Still, if that did happen, it'd be awesomely realistic, because he has no training, no money and a bat costume that was made for a guy who is half a foot taller than him. Did I mention I love Nolan's realistic approach?

There are a lot more Batman gadgets this time around, which is good, because I keep running out of toys to buy. This time Lucious Fox early on says something about hey I need to show you our crazy technology that I've hidden away in this room. After they showed it, and talked about a new object called The Bat and it's lack of autopilot, I never thought they'd mention these things again, but Nolan is a wild sorcerer of genius and totally blew my mind by subtly using them a great deal for the rest of the movie.

Batman gets his back wrecked by something that happens. *SPOILER*: Bane breaks his back (or pops out a vertebrae) and locks him in an underground prison with a guy who fixes it in minutes. After Bruce finally manages to escape by only being able to make a long jump when not wearing a rope to show that he believed in himself (Chris Nolan avoids cliches at all turns). He voyages back to Gotham with a vengeance on his mind. He finally gets to Bane and has his awesome fight scene, and Catwoman shoots and kills Bane... What an awesome twist. I love that Batman doesn't accomplish anything in this movie except for flying away with a bomb at the end (with the fixed autopilot...that's why they mentioned it... HO HO HO.. GENIUS!).

Another great example of subtlety was a scene early on where Alfred basically tells Bruce to quit being Batman and eat lunch at this place in Paris. I almost fell out of my seat, when it turned out that was important. It's things like this where Nolan proves that he is the symbol for great filming like Gandhi is for peace (Ignore the fact that Gandhi was a wife beater...LOL).

Overall, this movie was perfect, except Batman was in it too much. It really should have focused on everyone else more and had Batman in it for no more than 20 minutes. The Dark Knight was the better movie because of this (and that awesome part with the two boats with bombs that plays out in Nolan's signature realistic way!). It's nice to have a movie finally show Batman off as the quitter I've always felt he should be (by always I mean since Chris Nolan invented the character of Batman properly...LOL).

I can't wait to see what shocking twists he puts into a movie next...seeing as I never see them coming from 2 hours earlier in the movie.

Masterpiece.

As an aside, I wanted to say that this theatre shooting thing is among the worst possible things I can imagine. The theatre is one of those places where you shouldn't ever have to be afraid to go. It's supposed to be safe, comfortable and fun. It seems to me, at least as of this moment, that this was a nearly unprovoked attack, but I still am hearing people talk about how they aren't going to see this movie or others any time soon because they are scared. I request that people don't let the actions of one lunatic ruin something you love. He will find his justice, and I hope in time that we all can find our way back to the safe feeling of the theatre. I also want to send respect and goodwill to the families of the victims, as well as the victims themselves, whom some of which are reported to have shielded and protected their loved ones. That's amazing and it's always sad when someone loses their life for doing the right thing.

E3 2012 - The Good

2012-06-14T00:12:00.001-03:00

This time around, I'd like to take a look at a few of the good things that I saw at E3 this year. I would first like to describe what it is that makes something from E3 good. E3 stands for Electronic Entertainment Expo, so ultimately the mission here is to be entertaining and electronic. Since everything there is electronic, I am looking at only what I can see as entertaining.

I will be posting the videos of the mentioned games so that you, can see what I've seen for yourself.

As an aside, comment below if you saw something at E3 that caught your eye but I didn't mention it, as I may not have seen it and would love to check it out.

Beyond: Two Souls (PS3 Exclusive)

I love how we have finally reached the point in our gaming technology that we cast real actors in our games. This particular piece of art is 'starring' Atlantic Canada's very own Ellen Page is coming to us from Quantic Dream, who most will know for bringing us the gem, Heavy Rain. As of right now, we don't know much about how it will play but it seems like it is aiming for the emotional attachment that is rare these days in cinema and gaming alike. David Cage the game director says that it will be more action oriented, so that should prove to be pretty interesting. Be sure to check out the video, in which David Cage puts his money where his mouth is as to how much better a full body performance capture is than a face only performance capture, ala L.A. Noire.

Watch_Dogs (PS3/Xbox360/Windows)

If you ask anyone what the biggest surprise was of E3, this was it. Seriously, none of us had heard of it before, and for that alone, I have to give Ubisoft some massive credit. Ubisoft has done very well at making hugely accessible games that still maintain a high level of intelligence, and this seems to be no exception from Ubisoft Montreal. Check out the attached trailer to see what looks like it could be a clever sci fi masterpiece.

The Last of Us (PS3 Exclusive)

Now, where the previous two titles that were mentioned weren't really discussed before the show, we all knew that this game was gonna show up at Sony's press conference. We saw the haunting visuals of a post apocalyptic world with plants overgrown across the city streets and buildings, and we saw the main characters Joel and Ellie struggling to survive in this brutal world. Not to mention the horrific zombie like plant infected people who seem eager to eat your brains, this seems like it is potentially the reinvention of the true survival horror game, and with Naughty Dog, the makers of Uncharted, behind it, I know it is in great hands!

Assassin's Creed III (PS3/Xbox360/Wii U)

Every place that you looked at E3, people were talking about he juggernaut that is Assassin's Creed III. This game is huge and it's pretty cool to see a small series grow into such a big deal so fast. After Ubisoft wasted our time with Assassin's Creed Brotherhood and Revelations, it's back on track with, what looks to be one of the most fun games ever. I pre-ordered it months ago...duh.

Gears of War Judgement (Xbox360 Exclusive)

During the 15 or so minutes that Microsoft talked about actual games this year, they quickly mentioned Gears of War Judgement, a prequel to the excellent trilogy, except this time, you play as my personal favorite of the cast, Baird (the blonde guy who always seems miserable and makes a lot of wisecracks...it's like looking in a mirror). They gave us no gameplay really, but at very least, I know it's gonna be a fun game and it's gonna be our chance to finally see what's up with Baird, who has always felt like the only undeveloped character of the main 4 characters of Gears.

God of War: Ascension (PS3 Exclusive)

Up until now, Sony only talked about it's unwanted multiplayer features for the game. Here, they still didn't bother talking about the story, which is to me, a huge selling point of the series. What they did show us, however, was that this is another God of War game, with excellent combat and gigantic monsters at all turns. God of War may not change much in it's gameplay or setting, but what it does change in, is the new faces and monsters you see and just the sheer moments of unbelievable awesomeness.

Halo 4 (Xbox360 Exclusive)

For those who know me, you're wondering why I'm mentioning Halo 4, and to be honest, it's just because it looks like some stuff is finally different in this newest outing. Mind you, it's not different in a gameplay way (which I've always felt has been the only good thing about Halo), but it actually seems like it may be mixing it up a bit with the enemies and the weapons. I liked the first Halo, hated the second and thought the third was not too bad. Either way, the preview for the game was a high point, based on it having a greatly different feeling to it than any other Halo game (though it sorta felt like Metroid Prime).

Crysis 3 (PS3/Windows/Xbox360)

This one is another no brainer, and is also one of the worst kept secrets, leading in to E3. With Crysis, I've found that all you need to know is that it looks beautiful, it takes you to the most beautiful places possible and it is a smooth FPS like no other. As of right now I'm working on Crysis 2, but the first one on PSN or XBLA is something everyone should download and enjoy. Near the end the game really takes you on a wild ride, and this looks like a great end to the whole series.

Tomb Raider (PS3/Windows/Xbox360)

I find it to be pretty hilarious that everyone accused Uncharted of being a Tomb Raider knock off when it first came out, strictly because it was about a treasure hunter who went to ruins and had to solve some puzzles. The only difference was that Uncharted did so much more than that, and now Tomb Raider is taking some cues from the evolution of Uncharted. Please, don't misunderstand me though. I'm not saying Tomb Raider is copying Uncharted. What I'm saying is that Tomb Raider observed the great changes that Uncharted made to the formula and made them it's own. The result is what looks like one of the best games at E3 this year. Instead of the funny one liners you may expect from Nathan Drake, you get a girl who is fighting for her survival at all costs, and she's really taking a beating. Tomb Raider is the game that the Lara Croft series needs... hopefully, it will make me forget about Tomb Raider: Underworld.

South Park: The Stick of Truth (PS3/Xbox360)

A South Park styled JRPG that is actually developed with Matt Stone and Trey Parker... it's brilliant and it looks like so much fun. They even went so far as to make it look terrible, on purpose as South Park would. The idea is that you create yourself and join the South Park gang to save the town from a great evil force. It looks funny as hell and at least equally as fun. I can't wait for this PSN/XBLA title.

...and the best thing at E3 this year was....

Sony CEO Jack Tretton

Don't judge me...he's just so darn adorable!

Keep in mind there were several other games that I am pretty interested in. Many of which more so than the titles listed above, but I didn't see them have much of a presence in the press conferences so I didn't add them. Other ones to look out for are Metal Gear Rising, Darksiders II, Resident Evil 6 and many others.

Overall: E3 this year was pretty underwhelming, but the high points were very high. As I criticized it for beforehand, the big game companies have seriously gotta stop announcing everything 2 weeks before the show. As you may have noticed from my list, all of my selections for the best of E3 were games and none of them had anything to do with stupid gimmicks or dancers or Usher. Games are why we watch E3, and it breaks my heart to see that Nintendo is again coasting on nostalgia and not trying anything new. Still a part of me wants to see that Zelda game with a silent Link and HD graphics with orchestral music and a full voice cast for everyone else. I still love the Nintendo characters to a certain degree (minus Mario, who has really worn out his welcome for me at this point) and want to see them doing something exciting for a change.

E3 2012 - The Bad

2012-06-07T01:01:00.000-03:00

E3 has been something of a mixed bag this year. Overall, my complaints going in have proven to be accurate with every one of the big three announcing or "leaking" their announcements before the show, which basically takes away the whole excitement factor. Where Sony and Microsoft are concerned, it seems like they basically are waiting for this year to be over so they can get to their next console announcements, and with Nintendo, they are up to their usual tricks in announcing the same Mario games over and over again and knowing that people will mindlessly buy it. I want to take this in more of a point form direction as there is a lot to cover, so let's get to it.

Note: I decided to split this into two parts as there is a lot of ground to cover.

Iwata-San standing in front of a sign that can be translated to say "Give us your money bitches!"

Wii U - This was the biggest story of E3 going in and I'm sure many would maintain that it still is. Unfortunately, the message that Nintendo sent to me was that I could play mini game collections and newer versions of old Mario games. They pretty much ignored their 3DS market (which at this point is their bread and butter) to the point where the guy who quickly squeezed in a few 3DS announcements (of more Mario games) even was complaining about how little time he was given. The 3DS did end up with a separate video conference later on, but I honestly didn't care. When they announced the Wii U, they described it as "the wii for you...that's why we've decided to call it The Wii U." This excited the audience at last years E3, as they were actual gamers and Nintendo insisted this time it would be bringing the core gaming experience that we have been begging for. Unfortunately, this only means that you will get to play games that came out on PS3/X360 a year or so before. They even went as far as to brag about Batman Arkham City coming to the Wii U at launch. I'll pass, as I've already played through it with a better controller last year some time. As far as new game announcements go, it was pretty slim, though the new Rayman Legends game looks kinda neat, it probably would be just as fun on the iPad.

Nintendoland - I have no intention of bagging on Nintendo for this whole write up, but I need to mention Nintendo's big E3 swan song, Nintendoland. Nintendo proudly proclaims it to be "the only mini game collection that includes Nintendo characters". After that, we get an extremely long demo where a japanese guy explains to us how it works. The game (Luigi's Ghost Mansion) was basically a 4 player Luigi's Mansion mixed with Pac Man, yet somehow this took at least 10 minutes to explain. Ultimately, this presentation and the entire Nintendo presentation as a whole looked pretty awful and insultingly unambitious. Nintendo is basically saying "we know you'll buy it, so we aren't gonna try". Sadly, Nintendo fanboys have been obliging this pretty seriously on various message boards too.

Wonderbook - Remember last year's E3 showing of Disney Kinect Adventures from Microsoft? That was seriously painful, and I am attaching the link to that video here so that you can go see it, if you haven't. It's a great example of a video game company missing the mark, and showing the wrong audience something relatively fascinating. This year, Sony clearly decided that it could be way more groan inducing than Microsoft with something called Wonderbook. Sony's conference was going really great, until they decided to dedicate 20 minutes of their 90 minute time slot to Wonderbook. I kid you not, this was the longest presentation Sony did. Basically, it's an augmented reality book that you can used with the Playstation Move and PS Eye. You open it and wave your move around and it apparently adds up to being fun. The presentation was so bad that it moved past Disney Kinect Adventure's laughable presentation and into straight up agony. This may be interesting enough for children who like Harry Potter (as that's how they advertised it), but after 20 minutes, my friend fell asleep, my girlfriend who loves Harry Potter got so bored she walked off, and I seriously considered playing my Vita until it was over. Speaking of which....

Sony pretty much ignoring the Vita - Sony clearly thinks pretty highly of their new handheld, and why shouldn't they? It's a great system. It's the handheld that I myself have always wanted and I can say I've had some really special gaming experiences with it, sitting outside in the sun. Sadly, the sales do not reflect this, as people claim their are no games for it. I have 5 physical games right now and will be buying Gravity Rush in a few days, when it releases. For a console that has been out for barely 3 months, that is pretty good. Sadly, Sony seems oblivious to it's serious sales problems and instead of dropping the price or doing much of anything at all to help out this great machine, they said we'll be able to play Playstation 1 games soon on it (which was already announced), and that a special Assassin's Creed 3 spin off will be coming to the Vita with a white Vita bundle on the day that Assassin's Creed 3 comes out (Assassin's Creed 3: Liberation). Hell yeah. They also told us that their smash bros. rip off game Playstation All-Star Battle Royal (rolls right off the tongue) will be on Vita too. Ultimately, that was not enough. They could have even talked about already announced games if they had the time to.... I'm looking at you Wonderbook.

Aisha Tyler & Tobuscus - Every year, Ubisoft hires someone to be obnoxious while hosting their panel and every year everyone complains about it. This year they hired two people and it actually did work out to be double annoying. Whenever Aisha wasn't talking about her girl wood, Tobuscus (as he apparently goes by on youtube) just acts obnoxious and expects people to laugh afterwards. The whole act fell flat. Perhaps it's time we just go with Ubisoft's french-Canadian management team as the hosts, as I would honestly enjoy that more. As an aside, Ubisoft's games were some of the best shown (but I'll get to that on E3 2012 - The Best).

Usher - Usher came out and performed a song for Dance Central 3 at Microsoft's show. I'm not really sure who this was for.

Pretty much EA's entire conference - It wasn't offensive at all, it was just boring. Tons of sports games that are barely any different than last years. None of EA's partener's were there. The new Medal of Honor looks pretty cool, and the new Sim City looks pretty fun too, but I really didn't care until the very final announcement. Crysis 3, which almost made up for all of the boring Madden talk... almost.

American McGee's Alice (PS3/x360, 2000)

2012-05-31T16:33:00.002-03:00

For years I've been hearing about this crazy dark image of the Alice in Wonderland story. As a lifetime console gamer it's one of those ideas that makes me consider a trip over to the PC realm, but I just never got around to it. Recently, I was at the store and found Alice: Madness Returns (which I'll be reviewing shortly) on the shelf for a great price. On the back, to my surprise, it said it had a coupon inside to play the original game as included DLC.

I need to reiterate that this game was originally released in the year 2000. Mind you, they clearly threw an HD remastering on it, but for a game 12 years old to look as good at this game does is really a feat. The controls also worked pretty well, though the jump mechanics can be difficult due to having trouble telling how far away platforms are. I understand that this game was originally designed for the mouse and keyboard, but personally, I felt right at home with my controller.

I would like to say that I am an expert when it comes to Alice in Wonderland, but that would be a filthy lie. All I have ever known of it was that there is a hatter who madly loves tea and a badass cat who smiles and instigates Alice at every turn. I also know that Tim Burton tried his dark take at Alice in Wonderland and made a billion dollars worldwide with what most people would call a terrible and typical Tim Burton movie with no respect for the source material. Oh well, at least Johnny Depp got to put on white makeup....again.

Where it is generally accepted that Wonderland is a place in Alice's mind, what happens when Alice's mind falls apart? That's the idea that this game plays with. This takes place after the original story, when one night while Alice is off in Wonderland in her dreams and a fire starts in her home. She barely escapes her home, but ends up hearing her parents screams as they burn to death. This drives her over the edge and leaves her in an asylum, where her only hope is to go back into her now deranged version of Wonderland, in hopes that she can reconstruct her mind. The whole game plays out as a very interesting story of PTSD and dealing with it in a dark way, and oh what a dark way it is.

Atmospherically, this game is one of the most impressive feats that I have ever encountered before. I found overwhelming dread the further into the game I got. What I found interesting about the character of Alice, is that she seems to think the world around her is strange for all sorts of the wrong reasons. Whether it be a character in a torture apparatus asked why he was put there by the Mad Hatter. The first thing that she suspects is that he is guilty of slurping his tea or talking while eating at the table. She's wonderfully oblivous to how crazy this world is, and instead of making this world seem unrelateable , it only serves to make the atmosphere draw you in. Near the end of the game, I found myself thinking differently to try to compensate for the craziness that is this version of Wonderland, and for a game to teach you how to think like an insane person, I have no other term for it than art.

I love this version of the Hatter.

In the end, the whole game comes down to Alice battling her inner demons, and it fits with the classic story in an unprecedented way. This game is a masterpiece and I recommend it to anyone who has the patience to play a game with dated controls, older graphics and a really high difficulty curve. If you value atmosphere, this is one of the very best games ever made.

Hunted: The Demon's Forge (PS3/x360, 2011)

2012-05-28T10:25:00.000-03:00

There is an art to being tedious. If you are one of the people who believes that statement, this is pretty much your equivalent to Van Gogh's Starry Night.

The real selling point to this game, was the concept that it was an entirely coop campaign, and unlike many games, it's storyline was set up as such. This way, whoever was playing the second character wasn't just vanishing during storyline cut scenes and so on. The problem here is that there is pretty much no storyline at all.

At least Lucy Lawless voices this character, but I think the
sound was recorded in someone's bathroom, as it sounds terrible.

The 'story' goes like this:

1. 2 characters are lead to a town to go on a quest by Lucy Lawless showing up in their dreams. (My dreams with Lucy Lawless in them are so much better, but let's move on.)
2. They are greedy and want money for whatever reason (they never say why).
3. They try to convince you that they become heroic after a while, but they don't really try that hard.
4. The game ends with what can only be called a twist... maybe (again, there is no investment in these characters at all, so it's pretty much useless).

Fair enough. In this day and age, story is often the least important thing about games, after all, look how successful the Halo series is with it's whole go here and destroy this storyline that everyone raves about. Speaking of Halo, Bungie (the company who up until now has made all of the Halo games) has this mentality of creating the most fun 30 seconds you can have over and over again. This clearly was something that came through with the makers of this game, except instead of the 30 seconds of fun formula, it instead uses the 15 minutes of annoying enemies attacking non stop over and over again. It just gets old, and if you think about it, every chapter is probably 20 rooms with a metric ton of padding to keep you in each one before moving to the next.

From a game-play standpoint, this game isn't terrible, though the swordplay is a bit on the loose side and tends to degenerate into tapping the attack button over and over again. Fortunately, as you develop more powerful skills and magics, you probably can do without using a sword ever again. There is also a pretty decent bow and arrow/ third person shooter mechanic that works pretty well, with the exception of the arrows refusing to hit the targets some time. For example, you see an enemy, aim for his head and fire but another enemy walks partially in front of him. Instead of the enemy in front taking the hit or the enemy in the back taking the hit, somehow neither one takes a hit at all. This came up many times, and leads me to believe that you can only hit the one you are targeting.

Worst of all though, is the shitty comic relief jammed into the dialogue all through this game. You will likely hear the characters say something that is poking fun at how crappy the game's formula is.

Here are a few examples of this.

1. It's not uncommon to pick up a health potion and have them say, "You can never have too many health potions", which is bullshit cause you can only have 3.
2. They love to make reference to how you are always encountering yet another gigantic door to get to the next area.
3. "It's raining targets" one of the characters will say when you are under attack by endless enemies over and over again, which isn't funny because you've already heard this exact comment said about 35 times by the end of the game.
4. They refer to how the enemies never stop coming constantly, which again, you will be saying way before they will, so it's just annoying having the game say, "Oh yeah, the game designers totally knew there were too many enemies."

Overall, Hunted isn't a good game at all. I couldn't recommend it to anyone, and would suggest just steering clear of it all together.

Platinum trophy note: I managed to get the platinum, but the game has a really bizarre issue with it's trophy for picking up all of the crystals in the game. This little glitch made me have to play through the whole sodding game a second time. If you do intend to go for this platinum be sure to study the trophy guide on ps3trophies.org to save yourself several miserable hours of gameplay.

3D has got to stop!!!

2012-05-24T12:51:00.000-03:00

Since the Avengers has come out, I've gone to see it twice more, only to find myself not able to get into the regular showing as it was sold out. The second time, it wasn't sold out, but it was so full, I couldn't sit next to my friend and then it sold out about 5 minutes later (after I got my refund). While getting my refund, the girl at the theatre counter informed me that I could go see the 3D version which was under half full, which sends me a pretty clear message. If one theatre is overflowing, and the somewhat larger 3D showing theatre is under half full, perhaps it's time give more showings of the non 3d version. Not to mention the fact that there are two showings in regular (I refuse to call it 2D...because we never had to call it that before this 3D gimmick), while we have 3 3D showings. The latest of our regular showings is at 7:30pm...which for me personally is impractical, as every movie here in town is usually 9-9:40.

The point I'm trying to make, is that we are being strong armed into watching the movie in 3D, whether we want to or not. The midnight showing of the Avengers, here in Fredericton, was in two theatres, both doing 3D showings. The kicker is that the 3D in all of these movies is considered to be at it's best when it's unobtrusive. Meaning that 3D is literally making movies worse, and the best 3D movies are the ones that are ruining the movie the least. It's not fun to wear plastic sunglasses in a dark theatre. It adds nothing to the movie, and anything short of Avatar and computer generated movies have not improved at all from these so called upgrades. Essentially, we all know that we are getting screwed into paying more money, without the slightest concern about what we're paying extra for.

Why is it that only now do I stand on my soap box about this issue? I do this because I read this. Now whether you care about G.I. Joe or not, to take a movie out of the theatres a month before it's release to tack 3D on to it so it will make more money by scamming the ticket cost up is unethical, and I wouldn't be surprised if the studios use this idea more times in the future.

For all of my complaints about Nolan's Batman movies (which again, I like as movies, but am not impressed with as Batman movies), I gotta give Nolan props for flat out telling the studios NO to 3D. He was very proud to tell the media this fact, and he had every right to be.

So what do we do about it? Vote with our dollars. I'm seriously telling you to go out of your way to see a regular screening of the movie you want to see, and if they only have a 3D showing, don't see it (or don't pay to see it). The irony is that the 3D thing is to make it so that movies won't be cammed as easily and thus can help stop piracy, but for me, a person who's given so much money to the film industry, I'm done with 3D and am seriously considering going that route. The only way to kill it is to prevent it from being the money making machine that it is. I'd rather pay more for regular screenings than pay anything for 'so called' 3D.

The Avengers (2012) Non Spoiler

2012-05-04T13:38:00.000-03:00

I may gush a little about this movie, but I'm not blind. This poster is absolute shit!

*DON'T LEAVE THE MOVIE BEFORE THE CREDITS HAVE COMPLETELY FINISHED!!! TWO SCENES!*

First I want to give you a huge tip for enjoying this movie properly. In my theatre, it was preceded by a trailer for Tim (One trick pony) Burton's new movie, 'Frankenweenie'. If you want to not hear someone hyperventilating and squealing with chalkboard scratch sounding bliss through the whole movie, don't sit near any remotely emo dressed girls. Trust me on this. Life is too short.

It's been a long time since I've connected to a movie to the point where I've wanted to write something about it. Of course, I've obviously been pretty heavily invested into this movie for quite some time, based on the last few of my game write ups. Avengers was hugely hyped in my mind to be the best superhero movie ever made, and I have to say for me, it totally lived up to it.

The comparisons with the Transformers movies have been unavoidable with the movie trailers, but I can happily say that this makes none of the mistakes that Michael Bay made. This movie takes what we already know from Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Iron Man 2, Thor and Captain America: The First Avenger and merges it together in a believable way that makes old comic geeks like myself feel giddy inside. Also, it's very easy to see all of the action as opposed to close up shots of what can only be assumed to a giant scrap heap rolling down hill, inter-cut with Shia Lebeouf (if I spelled it wrong, I don't respect him enough to figure out the right way) running away. Another thing this movie does really well that Transformers tries way too hard at and fails every time, is the comedy. This has to have some of the funniest movie moments that I've ever seen in an appropriate way. See it, you'll know what I mean.

The fight scenes in this movie get progressively more entertaining, and when we reach our final climax I actually felt satisfied, which is something I haven't felt with the end of any superhero movie to this point, with the exception of Batman Begins. As far as villains go, Loki is pretty top notch. Tom Hiddleston is genuinely enjoying himself with his belief that humans should all bow down to him. He's always several steps ahead of everyone and is fully capable of taking over the planet to finally be the king he believes he was supposed to be. His only flaw of course is obvious based on the last sentence that I wrote though, as his arrogance is as limitless as his potential (which really makes him a Marvel character through and through).

One complaint that I have is that I feel Thor was a little bit under used compared to the others, whom all very clearly had their place in the greater scale of things. The team dynamic is obviously important as they go out of there way to show that every member has their place. Captain America isn't nearly as strong as most of the other Avengers, but he's a great leader. Iron Man is brilliant and able to fix tech like it's nobodies business. Hulk is the big gun, in that he probably could destroy anything in the blink of an eye. This is the issue for Thor. He's not the leader the tech guy or the big gun, he's just the villain's overly naive brother. Though, it is touching to see how much Thor obviously loves Loki and wants to help him get things back to how they used to be.

Marvel Studios took a huge gamble when they started this whole thing. If even one of their movies bombed this movie may never have happened, and even still the odds of this movie actually working were even lower. This movie genuinely puts any movie with a higher budget to shame, for having better action, better effects and about 20 minutes more of it than any other movie I've ever seen. It also completely shuts me up about every other Marvel movie always having a crappy final battle (especially Iron Man 2 with it's stupid beam high five). The whole thing is a bloody miracle.

What some may consider to be a slower bit, is during the first 20 minutes when SHIELD is going around to recruit all team members, wherever they may be. However for myself, I felt these scenes were exciting, fun and necessary. Everything in this movie felt so connected to the proper Marvel Universe and the crowd was loving it as much as I was. To me, that meant it worked. Perhaps it's time some other people in the film industry realize this and allow certain characters to be used closer to the way they are in the comics. It seems to work, as most of these characters who other studios are 'making relevant for movies' have already stayed relevant for the past 50+ years just fine.

That's how I see it at least.

I give it 5 end credit scenes out of 5!

Iron Man 2 (PS3/x360, 2010)

2012-05-01T10:15:00.002-03:00

I honestly never thought I'd be able to beat and platinum Iron Man 2 in time for the Avengers to hit the theatre, but to my surprise I found myself eager to finish this game as quickly as possible. The platinum came in one evening of non stop playing, which I'm not going to lie, is a long time for the average person out there. In 7 hours, I was able to beat the game twice and then grind out level specific trophies. This is a classic sign of a crappy movie cash in. Where Thor and Captain America were both somewhat below the line of what I would consider being good games, at least there was obvious effort put into certain things, but ol' shell head got shafted hard.

First off, you may notice that Tony Stark/Iron Man is voiced by some guy doing a Robert Downey Jr. impression. It seems to take a lot of effort to do, as he is never able to sound engaged at all and talks too slow to really feel right. The cast however isn't entirely a wash out, as they oddly enough got Don Cheadle to be War Machine and Samuel L. Jackson to be Nick Fury. They both did fine, but the dialogue didn't flow anything like it does in the movies, so the whole 'Iron Man 2 feeling' was nowhere to be found.

The story takes place after Iron Man 2...I think. Someone attacks one of Stark's reactors, he goes after them with War Machine and SHIELD. The villain is potentially interesting in that it is a man who merges with a highly powerful giant robot that was created by Stark Industries before Stark swore off weapons. This allows for Tony to have a moment of grief over having to clean up all of the terrible things that he has brought into the world. If nothing else, there is a nice scene where Stark tries to talk down the iron giant (Ultimo) by saying he is sorry that this living machine has been given such a negative view on human kind by evil men, but of course it just goes right back to cookie cutter DESTROY YOU dialogue right after.

Crimson Dynamo!!! This is what Vanko's suit should have looked like at the end of the movie!

The shock here is that the story is apparently written by current Invincible Iron Man scribe, Matt Fraction, who seriously put no effort into this. I have a suspicion that what they mean by written is that it was handed to Sega on a crumpled up napkin. Either that, or they just ignored his script and credited him anyway.

An interesting part of this game, that I found somewhat surprising is that the soundtrack is entirely heavy metal music. Honestly, it's pretty unique, and I see why you would go with metal for Iron Man but...it is trying to tie itself to a movie and then avoiding the feeling of that movie at all costs.

Truth be told, the reason that movie tie in games have a bad name, is because of games like this. The final boss fight was a nightmare as I was trying over and over again to fly to a specific spot but the camera kept "adjusting" me to a completely different spot than I needed to get to. This is a really garbage game and I don't recommend it to anyone really. Go download the demo and play it if you are curious. That is 1/8th of the entire game and the rest only gets worse.

Oh well, Avenger's month is over, and I have two little fanboy sleeps to go!

Now, I'm gonna get back to my quest to figure out the best game of last year. I'm almost finished believe it or not.

Thor: God of Thunder (PS3/x360, 2011)

2012-04-30T13:15:00.000-03:00

I'm running out of time, as the Avengers movie is almost here and I've made it my mission to play Captain America: Super Soldier, Thor: God of Thunder and Iron Man 2 (and earn their platinum trophies) before this Thursday's midnight showing. The pinch is on as I've only just finished Thor: God of Thunder last night.

First up, I need to drop a disclaimer for this review. I can't lie. I have a huge man-crush on Chris Hemsworth. It's not sexual, but I would love to hang out, eat a burger and talk about his hammer....ahem. Anyway, for Odin!

Thor: God of War....or rather, that's the title they clearly wish they were going by, is a pretty weak knock-off of Santa Monica Studios' epic masterpiece God of War. Seriously, it even looks like the PS2 God of War games. Right away, you notice the graphics are terrible, but as I often try to advocate, as a gamer from the old age, graphics aren't everything. So let's move past that. This game is flawed in so many ways that it's pretty easy to bash.

The story honestly works with the 'movie Thor' universe, taking place before the movie, where Loki works out a plan to trick Thor into going on an epic journey and waking up a super powerful being called Mangog to attack Asgard. This all works out well and good, but when Mangog get's to Asgard, Loki's big plan to look like a hero and defeat him doesn't work out. Mangog is a badass, and a really tough one at that. Ultimately, he needs to get Thor and help guide him back from his mission to clean up the mess that he has made, while Odin is trying to stand toe to toe with the force that he created many years before. Overall, this story, while definitely not breathtaking, fits the characters well and brings me great joy!

While I like the story, there are very few good character moments, minus the loving but scolding talks that Thor gives to his brother Loki...who is a huge f**k up, but still family. Thankfully, Thor is voiced by Chris Hemsworth and Loki is Tom Hiddleston, so they both know what they are doing very well, and put a great effort forth.

Where this game falters however is the atrociously inaccurate controls. Oh man, I almost flipped out so many times when I would tap the jump button and forward in an effort to jump forward, but instead just walk off an edge. In fact, so much of this game consists of delays. I recall one battle where I was fighting the douchebag pictured below, when it cut to a cut scene of him jumping to the platform that I was on, when suddenly I just heard the sound of Thor die. Apparently, I took a hit before the cutscene started, but the game was too busy checking it's fantasy football to notice. Stuff like this happened a lot.

In fact, that was both the worst and the best thing about this game. The game is pretty easy, but like I said, I like to go for the Platinum trophy, which meant that I had to play through on Valhalla difficulty. Valhalla is the equivalent to VERY HARD mode, 'cause Hard mode is for sissies! The final boss, ol' Mangog on Valhalla is legendary for being so ungodly hard, it's amazing. The fight can last about 20 minutes and does not have any checkpoints despite consisting of 3 different phases. This means starting over from scratch over and over again. I tried several time before realizing I have a girlfriend and she didn't want to watch me fight a big glowing asshole in armor over and over again. Finally, I found some time to take him on and it took me 2.5 hours of trying and trying to take him down, but oh man, was it satisfying. This is why I love Demon's Souls so much. You will really have to push yourself to not give up, but when you do finally win, you feel damn good.

Above is a picture of Thor and Mangog, which actually ends up having both Odin and Loki helping you too, which makes it seem like that much more of a big deal.

Overall, this game is not very good, but in no way shape or form do I accept the claims that it is the "worst game ever" and that "no one should ever play it". If it's the worst game you've ever played, you haven't played many games, and you're very fortunate. I kind of enjoyed it despite it's flaws and recommend it, very cautiously, to people who like the Thor movie and God of War and understand that it's nowhere near as good as God of War. Sometimes, just playing as a character that you love makes you enjoy it. If that makes sense to you, you know whether or not this game is worth a play, otherwise don't bother.

Sam & Max: The Devil's Playhouse (PS3/iOS/PC/Mac, 2010)

2012-04-26T09:59:00.002-03:00

I remember the show Sam & Max: Freelance Police being on TV when I was a kid. I honestly don't remember much about the tone or even what specifically happened on it, but I know I liked it. So, a while back, Sony's Playstation Plus membership gave out this game in 5 episodes for free, and I ended up with them sitting on my hard drive for about a year. Historically speaking, when Telltale Games makes a game, I don't bother with it, as my brain just doesn't usually work that way.

Basically, the method of these games is that you walk around, observe items, pick up things and talk to people. That's basically the entire game. The trick is, you need to use a twisted, borderline psychotic sense of logic to get around obstacles. For example, a giant is attacking the city. First thing you need to know is that this particular giant loves corn dogs, and after talking to people, you realize that if you get into his mouth, you may be able to stop him. Naturally, that means that you have to fill a giant pothole with water, by convincing the giant to throw a water tower at it, then have him throw your car into it too and then have him pick up a conveniently placed truck filled with corn dog mix and shake it over the mixture to turn your car into a giant corn dog. It's nuts.

Where this game shines is by having one of the best senses of comedy that I have EVER seen. The characters are so funny and the gags are so clever. Sam is a pretty serious detective dog character who, I'm not gonna lie, is freaking cute! Max is a lunatic rabbit who truly embraces the art of madness and random thoughts. Max also somehow got super powers out of nowhere, which the game keeps making fun of how out of nowhere this is. These guys are the best!

I really like Telltale Games' release strategy. Basically, how it tends to work, is that you play $19.99 for the season. The seasons tend to be divided up into 5 episodes and every month you get a new one. They usually average in length at about 2-3 hours a piece and always end up with a brilliantly shocking and funny cliffhanger to make you need to play the next one. The sense of humor is ever present and the stories are some of the best that you can find. Since finishing this, I have gone on to download Back to the Future, which acts as a 4th back to the future movie. As of this writing, I have finished the first 2 of 5 episodes, and have become a fan of Telltale's methods.

Overall, I have tried many times to play Secret of Monkey Island (an old classic which is probably the best known example of this game type), but my brain just never worked that way, until Sam and Max trained me on how to think outside the box. I'm gonna go back for Monkey Island soon. Give this a shot. Even if you need to use a guide online while playing it, you won't regret it for the story and comedy within.

Captain America: Super Soldier (PS3/x360, 2011)

2012-04-16T14:07:00.000-03:00

I am so super stoked for the Avengers movie, that it's a little bit unhealthy. The thought of seeing several of my favorite superheroes on screen together and fighting a villain that I can actually respect (Loki...not the stupid aliens) has me giddy with anticipation. To celebrate this absurd excitement, I have decided that I will play and write a review for 3 of the Avenger's solo games, consisting of Iron Man 2, Captain America: Super Soldier and Thor: God of Thunder. I am fully aware of how terrible this can turn out as most movie licensed games are beyond shit...but every now and again, a great game will sneak out (like X-men Origins: Wolverine, which was so awesome despite it's shitty movie).

First off, I decided to go with Captain America, cause playing as him sounded the most exciting to me. Here's how that went.

For those of you who have seen the Captain America movie, this storyline seems to take place in the middle of the sequence where you see Cap kickin Hydra ass. The story is about Cap going in to a Hydra facility to stop the mad Dr. Zola and save several trapped soldiers of the good ol' U.S. of A. from his sinister experiments. Obviously, the plot isn't really the important part here as it's essentially your typical save A. from the evil B. The only really special thing about it is that even more-so than the movie, this game shows off how important Dumdum Dugan and Bucky are in the Captain America story. Both of whom help in their own ways, by saving the hostages. A great Captain America moment is when he goes into a specific battle, expecting to die and hoping to buy the others enough time to stop the enemy in a different way. Of course, he's Captain America, and selflessness is his thing.

This game is barely about the story though. You only play this game because you want to play as Captain America, and this doesn't disappoint. The combat is very similar to Batman Arkham Asylum, in the respect that you are able to fight large crowds all at once, while countering from all directions. It's pretty fun. The shield comes into play too, in that you can bounce bullets back at snipers who are far away from you and take them down. It's impressive to see Cap taking on 6 guys at once and then turning to bounce a bullet at a sniper before effortlessly getting back to kicking the remaining guys around again. It is all very smooth and very enjoyable.

From a graphical point of view, the game is very nice to look at, but in a more stylistic way than a graphically strong way. I would say it's like a very impressive PS3 launch title. Which is satisfactory, but nothing to write home about. Really, the whole thing is very impressive for a movie tie in from Sega, who fails on a regular basis at these things.

It is also worth noting that the music, while a little bit generic at times has moments of brilliance. I actually was left wondering if it was the movie's score, which would make sense, but I really couldn't tell. Either way, the music works.

So lets rank this up... the music works, the story is good enough, the graphics are alright and the gameplay is pretty good. This is a good start to Avengers month. I expected apocalyptically awful. There is one problem that I feel must be addressed though. The game is way too easy. In a way I loved that, after Deus Ex, it was nice to have a game I could just chill out with and play effortlessly, but if you are looking for a challenging experience, it's not likely gonna be here. Perhaps it's because Captain America is a bad dude, but I don't know. I didn't try hard mode, so that may have been the perfect fix. I recommend it for people who love Cap and Arkham Asylum, and just want to play something that isn't stressful at all for about 8-10 odd hours.

Oh, and by the way...you totally can throw the shield and it's wonderful!!

Deus Ex: Human Revolution (PS3/x360, 2011)

2012-04-10T11:55:00.000-03:00

There are many games that do style well, then there are games that do substance well. It's a rare occurrence that you get both. Tron Legacy has a remarkably cool look and an amazing soundtrack, but it lacks in story and it rarely gets you thinking. Still, I love Tron Legacy, entirely because it gives you a feeling that is unique. I would call it my favorite music video, and in that respect it serves it's purpose. Deus Ex: Human Revolution is pure style, and it really connects you to the world that you are roaming in, and it comes very close to mastering the story part of it too. It has a lot of character development, and a lot of interesting thought provoking ideas, mixed with the look of Blade Runner and the music of Michael McCann (which puts you in mind of the Dark Knight score, except significantly better).

When you land in a new location, be it China, or Detroit, or Montreal, you feel the mood change from wherever you were before. You walk the city streets, and see billboards on the buildings above advertising unique things that kind of subconsciously tell you what that individual place is like. I can honestly say, I don't remember the last time a world was so fleshed out for me and in that respect, Deus Ex: Human Revolution is a masterpiece.

I need to mention that on a graphical scale, this game wasn't terribly impressive, but I am not taking that as a negative, so much as a positive, which is what I believe Eidos Montreal did when making it. They decided to not make everything look super realistic and instead stylize everything...and I mean extreme style. The cyberpunk setting has never looked so good, at least, not that my eyes have seen.

Anyway, while I could talk about the stylistic visuals all day, and the overwhelming commitment to the main character's coolness, this game is a storyline game, so how does it hold up? The story starts off with you playing as all around badass Adam Jensen, who is the head of Security for a company called Sarif Industries. He is going through the security details of a very important press conference that is going to be showing the world great new advances in the field of cybernetic implants, which are already taking place in this world, but they are far from perfect. Suddenly the labs are under attack and before anyone can figure out how, Adam rushes into action to try and stop them and to save the lead scientist, his ex, Megan. It's important to note that Adam is just a man, and if you are playing on the highest difficulty (awesomely called Give me Deus Ex), you will get the most engrossing experience out of this game, as you will be very stressed every time you see a guy with a gun (which you will a lot). When Adam finally finds Megan, he gets beaten badly by some heavily augmented mercenaries and ends up nearly dead. This is where the game starts.

At this point, Adam is now rebuilt from head to toe, without his consent. He's disappointed in himself, because he wasn't able to save Megan and the scientists who died in the attack, and worst of all, the details just aren't adding up as to what happened that night. Even though he is on a much needed medical leave, he is called in to deal with a terrorist attack on one of Sarif Industries' factories. It is at this point that he get's involved with something that leads him to a global conspiracy. That's what this series is all about.

Good sci fi to me is all about presenting morally grey issues in a specialized setting where it can make the viewer really think about it. In this story people are divided on augmentations as some think it's an abomination, while others think it's amazing. There are a lot of comparisons in the storyline to Icarus from Greek mythology, which I think is really applicable here and gives a message, which very few games bother to do.

Earlier, I mentioned that it was almost perfect for story. Where is the flaw? There are a few things wrong with the game, but to me, the biggest one is the ending. I'm not going to spoil anything but I will say there are multiple endings and the execution of picking which ending you get and the endings themselves are the laziest things I've seen in modern gaming.

There are a few things that this game did that really felt fresh in today's gaming climate. First off, so many games go with a morality system, where if are good you get good points and if you are bad you get bad points, and those effect you in some way or another. In Deus Ex, you really don't get the sense of that. It feels like the game puts you into spots where you can do a good thing, or a bad thing, or choose between two bad things, or two good things, or any other combination of that. The game just throws it's hands up and says, it's your call, and to be honest, it makes making decisions a lot harder and meaningful. Another thing I would be crazy not to mention is the augmentation system. As you play you will occasionally acquire enough experience to upgrade your body parts, and unlike a lot of games where you upgrade things that you'll never use, you'll find yourself playing differently than you were up to that point. Enemies will kill you super fast on the highest difficulty, so you need to get enhancements to know where they are. You can see through walls, or walk quietly, or you can detect which way they are looking, and all of these things, make it so that you can strategically deal with situations, without ever making the game easy.

Seriously, this game made me feel more like Batman than Batman Arkham City did. In fact, this is Metal Gear Batman. I snuck through the whole game and killed no one, unlocking the Foxiest of the Hounds trophy. If you are a fan of Metal Gear Solid, you can see that the guys who made this game were too. This is a worthy successor to the original Deus Ex, and I couldn't be happier with it. Hopefully if another one comes out they will put a little more effort into the endings, and the boss fights (which ultimately are shoot em up bits after sneaking and killing no one for a few hours), but they have created something amazing and I want more of it!

Nintendo's at it again...

2012-04-05T14:29:00.001-03:00

Recent details have been slipping out about Nintendo's new console, the Wii-U. As it seems, they put about as much effort into making it the most powerful system of this generation of console (7 years after it's started) as they did into naming the damn thing. At last years E3, Nintendo was talking big about how powerful the system would be compared to the PS3 and 360, even saying it would be more powerful than both, but recent leaks from developers working on games for it are setting the record straight. CVG's report says that games will look just as good as the two current generation consoles, but not better. The other big thing to note is that the processing power is actually lower than Sony and Microsoft's 6 and 7 year old machines. The anonymous developer says that the physics and AI would actually take a hit. This seems to be Nintendo's strategy in recent years, with the exception of the briefly impressive 3DS screen. Find exceptionally old technology to make a cheap system that you can sell cheaply and keep pumping out the same old nostalgia games so people will instantly be giving them a profit.

It just cracks me up honestly, especially since there are also rumblings of Sony and Microsoft's next grown up systems coming next year. I wouldn't be surprised if Nintendo ends up really successful off of this, because people keep eating up that gimmick bullshit.

Resident Evil 5 (PS3/X360, 2009)

2012-04-02T16:37:00.000-03:00

With the recent announcement of Resident Evil 6, I finally had the pressure on to get the platinum trophy on Resident Evil 5. This game has been something I've played with friends off and on for 2 and a half years now. Sometimes when I go for the platinum, it's a grind, sometimes it's for the sake of getting a platinum, but for the greatest of games it's all about wanting the platinum, to say you have fully experienced a game you love. Now, for those of you who don't know what a platinum is, games have recently, started a system of hidden rewards for doing things you may not try to do. I believe the purpose of this has been to make games more replay-able, and for me it has worked very well. Xbox 360 started off with Achievements and later the Playstation modified the format into trophies, which I personally enjoy more based on small details. The platinum trophy, only comes when you get EVERY trophy in the game (with the exception of post released downloadable content, cause I don't want that crap). Essentially, what I'm trying to say is that I wanted to squeeze every bit of life out of this game, and now I can say that I have.

Resident Evil 5 has been judged by many for being too action oriented for a series that defined the term survival horror. Fundamentally, the way of the old Resident Evil games was that you would find hardly any ammo, and the controls were horrible, leaving you totally horrified and vulnerable whenever zombies came at you. It really worked well and allowed for a lot of strategic gameplay, but it makes it hard to play those games in this day and age, based on how smooth controls have come. Resident Evil 4 changed everything and added more action and removed a lot of the horror, where you found yourself fighting giants and sea monsters...seriously! However it was universally praised for being an amazing game. The best of 2005 in fact, according to many.

Resident Evil 5, improved the gameplay making it less stressful, but still slightly impaired leaving you feeling claustrophobic at times and made a crucial error in making this game entirely coop. So much so, that if you are playing without a friend, you have a terribly controlled computer partner. This kills all scares completely as you are no longer walking through terror all alone. Because of that complaint this is a genuinely hated game by many...except for me. I love playing games with coop. Especially when it is split screen couch coop. Sure, the horror atmosphere is gone, but this is one of the best coop experiences that I have ever played. It has individual characters who are actually important to the story and it is fully built for it. That is what has made me play through this game so many times. Seriously, I've probably gone through the whole game about 6 times, because various different friends would want to play it with me.

My favorite thing this game had going for it, however, was it's unforgiving, matrix knock-off lead villain. Albert Whiskers...

Errrr... Albert Wesker.

This guy is so cool it's kinda funny. He can kick your ass, and you really don't stand a chance against him, because he keeps injecting himself with viruses to make him half mutated but not fully mutated (cause he's special). This makes him absurdly powerful, and half of the time, from the moment he shows up, you are
trying to figure out how you could ever beat him. It's amazing to me that Capcom went with the weakness that they did for him, and I think it's flat out comedic gold. See those sunglasses he's wearing? Just kill the lights in the room you fight him in at the end of the game, and he'll walk around looking for you. This gives you a chance to hit him with a rocket launcher from behind. Seriously funny stuff! Kahn's weakness was his thirst for revenge. Wesker's weakness was the need to look super cool.

At this point, it's impossible to talk about Resident Evil 5 without mentioning the whole racism scandal. Let me see if you can figure this out. The game takes place in Africa... where people are being infected with a zombie-like virus on a grand scale. You're a white guy who's the member of a special ops team, who was sent in to stop it... do you see where this is going? I ask you, how could anyone argue with the fact that most of the infected would be black? Especially since a lot of the time, you are stumbling onto infected pockets of them who are more tribal. Don't get me wrong, the other half of the zombies, look like Saddam Hussein stand ins, but no one complained about that.

I figure the only way to get around that is to have your main character be a black person too, and that's what they did. Her name is Sheva, and quite honestly, she's treated very well by the story. You are also helped by an agent named Josh who is a black man. He too is a bad dude who saves you at times. I think the talk of this game being racist, is mostly coming from people who are looking for something to fight about. This is NOT a black person killing simulator!!! There is a really fun and interesting narrative, and quite frankly, I like it a lot more than Resident Evil 4, which I find nearly unplayable because of the left joystick aiming.

If you like playing games with friends, that feature a storyline, look no further, and try to overlook the fact that it barely feels like Resident Evil 1-3 anymore. It's still a good game, if you can overlook the lack of being able to move and shoot at the same time.

Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4 (PS3/X360/Wii, 2010)

2012-04-02T13:11:00.000-03:00

DISCLAIMER: I go off track a lot on this one and rant about a lot of things that piss me off that you may not particularly agree with. Feel free to tell me how stupid I am in the comments below.

Ok, I really hate Harry Potter. It's really overblown when at the end of the day it's just a children's book that hit a lot of people at a young enough age to give them the nostalgia factor. A lot of things don't hold up under those circumstances when viewed by fresh eyes. Harry Potter is a fantastic example of that, the same can be said of a certain other franchise that Lego has also taken on (not Star Wars obviously). If one thing can be said of this, it is that I was able to play through this whole game, so Lego and Traveller's Tales were at least able to keep it from being as lame as the movies were.

Years back on the PS2 I tried out Lego Batman. If you know me, you know I love Batman, but I didn't love or even like Lego Batman. It is essentially, too much of the same thing over and over again. Jump, walk, regular attack, special attack and that is it, over and over again. These games were something I decided I wouldn't bother with because they were for beginners of the gaming front, and not to sound like a snob, I need a little bit more from my games. However, when my girlfriend mentioned that she would like to try it out, I saw the opportunity to get her playing video games with me. Since we started playing this, I've been jokingly saying that her and I support game marriage. Which is great, because I'm a huge gamelord and this proved to be a successful mission. She enjoyed herself to play other video games with me and because of that, I enjoyed it too, to an extent.

Something occurred to me while playing this. This game is made for young children to play, and yet to my surprise, this game is a glitchy mess. It was honestly offensive. To make a game that suddenly kicks us out to the PS3 main menu while we were in the middle of play, is something I honestly hadn't seen anywhere else. It wasn't uncommon to get stuck in textures and to have the game freeze up. The game was pretty short, and we could only stand to play it for a few hours before stopping. Because of this, for every 1-3 hour play time, we usually had 1-2 freezes or glitches that would make us have to play through a level again or something like that. If you've read my Dark Void review, you'll understand that I am a pretty forgiving person to glitches, because with games as advanced as they are today, it's bound to happen, but for a game that is essentially a PS2 game with barely HD graphics to have even more bugs than normal, it spoke volumes to me about Traveller's Tales just not giving a shit. They made this game for stupid kids who like Harry Potter, "cause they won't know better". That's bullshit, and this is not ok. If this is how they handle their games, I'm sorry I ever bought one, and won't be buying anymore (except for Lego Pirates of the Caribbean, which I have already purchased with this game). On principle, I am not ok with pumping out bullshit for kids, but then again I suppose that is the standard for Harry Potter, isn't it? Harry Potter has more than proven that any story to a kid can be interesting or exciting, and nostalgia can be forever.

A fun experiment for me was that Indiana Jones was a series I somehow never saw as a kid. So when I finally went to watch them for the first time a few years ago, with no nostalgia at all, I thought Raiders of the Lost Ark was amazing! I then watched Temple of Doom, and thought it was amazingly bad. Then The Last Crusade which I thought was, not too bad, but nothing to write home about. I won't even go into my opinions of the newest one that nuked the fridge. The result of the no nostalgia factor has lead me to thinking that there is one good Indiana Jones movie, and the rest I could do without. Star Wars has never seemed to have that problem. To be good despite nostalgia is a sign of greatness (and no one needs to explain to me that Power Rangers is not a great show as I am aware that it's total nostalgia for me, but I'm not so jaded that I think it's the best thing ever).

I keep getting side tracked on this, but couldn't be happier that HP is done, and hopefully won't be having any more milking done with it anytime soon. If it does find a way to return, I wouldn't be surprised if the hardcore nostalgic fans of HP don't like it at all, because the nostalgia won't be there. As for this game, it blows, it's not worth the glitches as the gameplay isn't good and the storyline only excels when it's making fun of the source material (which it seems to be doing often). It has inspired me to play better coop games with my friend. We love sitting around playing with our joysticks like the gamelords that we are!

If you disagree with what I've said, tell me I'm wrong. I want to know other people's thoughts. I'm aware that my opinions aren't popular, but if Michael Bay's Transformer movies keep being "popular", then that's the last thing I want to be.

inFAMOUS: Festival of Blood (PS3, 2011)

2012-03-30T10:41:00.002-03:00

inFAMOUS: Festival of Blood is a PSN title that to me seems like it was initially an inFAMOUS 2 expansion. In fact, they still refer to it as an expansion, but it doesn't actually expand anything and is downloaded and played like a separate game. Anyway, those details are irrelevant. I enjoyed inFAMOUS 2 a lot and decided, I should get this game as it was criminally cheap at the price of $7.99. Somehow, though, even at 7.99, I felt short changed.

The story this time around doesn't seem to connect with the actual story. It seems like it's a fun Halloween adventure set in an else worlds setting. Zeke is in a pub trying to pick up a girl, and he explains that one time he had to save Cole, the hero of New Marais. The girl is intrigued to here his story, and as he starts telling it, you start playing it. It's pretty cool in that respect, especially since it's such a bizarre ass story. Cole is saving people who got stuck in a catacomb....for some reason. When he gets captured by vampires... Uhh... what? Did I say vampires? Oddly, yes I did. They then drain some of Cole's blood into a coffin to resurrect Bloody Mary. Seriously, that is the plot of this game. Cole get's blood rage and starts having to drain people to keep powered up.

The only real point of this game is that Cole's powers change. Sure he still shoots lightening, but now he gets vampire senses (cause they turned him into one) and he can turn into a swarm of bats and fly across the city (this is a great addition). He has to kill Bloody Mary before sunrise or else he will be stuck as a vampire. This works out, because doing everything there is to do in this entire game takes about 3-4 hours.

Don't get me wrong, from a game design perspective, this is a very solid game. Just when the ending comes to be, you are left wondering what the point of the whole thing is. It has it's moments of charm, but the karma system isn't there, and the only side missions in the game are those frustrating user generated missions, where I would say lies the weakest points of the whole inFAMOUS series.

From an ethical perspective, I can't say that it's ok to make a super short 2 hour game and allow users to pad it out with their user generated content. Sucker Punch is a better studio than this and I feel like this was a cash grab in the most obvious of ways.

I don't recommend this game, unless it finds it's way down to 2.99 or something. Then it's a good very short time killer that let's you try out some fun vampire powers.

Man-Bat...seriously!

Could this be Bigfoot!?

2012-03-21T15:08:00.001-03:00

This picture has recently been released and is being called the clearest and greatest picture of Bigfoot ever! Could it be real?

Well, I'm here to tell you, it could be. Using my highly advanced digital technology, I picked out a reflection of the so called bigfoot's face on a leaf in front of it. The image that I found may be disturbing to some. Only read on if you have a strong stomach.

Please keep in mind that I am only interested in presenting the needed information. It is your job to decide for yourself what this is.

This can only be called a sign of the end times. Dear me.

inFAMOUS 2 (PS3, 2011)

2012-03-15T15:03:00.000-03:00

I need to be up front about this review right from the start. I loved the first inFAMOUS. It's fun to feel so powerful and hover down from rooftops to bust criminals. The simple mechanic of absorbing electricity from anything that had it to replenish your strength made you seem like a battery with limited resources. This allowed moments of dread when you walked somewhere where the power was turned off, and honestly makes you seem more badass for moving forward regardless.

I have played many games since I played 2009's instant classic, and I didn't quite remember various things about the story, but inFAMOUS 2 came along and reminded me of the story up to this point. It manages to walk a fine line by not being hung up on what has happened in the past, but not ever forgetting about it. Every now and again it will have a casual line in the dialogue that shows that the characters are still effected by the events of Empire City, but the big action of inFAMOUS 2 starts right in the opening seconds when you realize, that stuff before was nothing compared to the stuff now.

I need to get this out of the way too. Cole, our main character, has since had a change of voice actor, and this is actually an improvement. Before it was a standard growly voice, but now it's a very unique voice that perfectly fits his face and has a lot of personality.

Where this game excels is definitely in being different than other games, and only now can I say that it has become a completely unique thing. In inFAMOUS, you had great combat mechanics, amazing powers and brilliant climbing, pared with a cool story that allows decision making. inFAMOUS 2 looked at the formula and said, "let's make what was good better, and give it all a whole new style that no one has seen in a game before." Simple things changed, like the location, from Empire City to New Marais (or New York to New Orleans) allow for beautiful scenery with swamps and bayous as well as beautifully designed New Orleans style buildings. Throw in some of the most original and incredible music from a more jazz and blues background and it changes the feel completely.

The story itself starts off shortly after inFAMOUS' ending where Cole defeats his alternate future self who came back to make sure Cole was ready with his powers in time to deal with "The Beast". Since then he has found a scientist from New Marais who can help him grow his powers so that he'll be ready for whatever this beast is. As he is getting on the boat to go to this scientist, the beast shows up and starts destroying Empire City. This whole first mission finds you flat out facing the beast in all out mortal combat, and draining most of your power just blowing him away. In the end, you find yourself nearly dead. Eventually Cole wakes up on the boat going to New Marais with the discovery that The Beast has just reformed himself and destroyed Empire City. A wave of destruction is moving down the east coast of the U.S. from Empire City to New Marais and no one can stop it. This game is about getting ready for when The Beast arrives.

This is not The Beast. The Beast would mess this thing up!

This whole game has a whole sense of dread to it, as you've seen how powerful this adversary is, and you keep hearing the news refer to it as a force of nature that is wiping out cities by the day. These places literally vanish with no one able to report it, so the government doesn't even know what is happening. On top of that, a plague has begun to spring across the country killing hundreds of thousands. That is a lot on your shoulders! It doesn't help that when New Marais flooded, it was taken over by a militia that was lead by a power hungry tyrant named Bertrand, who just has to be a superhuman himself. The whole story just glows as an awesome superhero story!

Another fun thing is that this time around, if you play the game as a good guy or a bad guy really does matter. In the past games have had certain things change depending on how good or bad you've played before it, but this game really has to take the cake with how big the difference is. I advise two playthroughs just to see how amazingly different the final missions are as well as the endings.

When Uncharted 2 came out, it changed gaming in a big way. Now people are really looking for honest to goodness characters. inFAMOUS 2 has learned from it too in a big way. The interaction between Cole and his best friend Zeke (who has to make up for some big mistakes from the first game), is at least as good as that between Nathan Drake and Sully. There is a mission that requires you to go hang out with Zeke and just watch a western on TV and drink some beers. It may sound dull, but it's played as hilarious as possible and this is what I feel games need more of. Make me care for these characters and I'll put more of myself into trying to do what's best for them.

There isn't much that is negative to say about this game. I'm even pretty fond of the user generated content that is added on, though I'm not entirely convinced that it really is needed for this game. Essentially that feature allows people to make their own missions for other people to play. Sometimes they are amazingly fun and other times they are so incredibly terrible that it's just depressing.

Overall, the missions do tend to eventually be a bit on the repetitive side, but I like it a lot. Both endings are great, but the good ending is perfect, and I'm very excited to see if there will be an inFAMOUS 3 as, I have no idea how you move on with either of these crazy different endings.

A New Way to Play (Part 5)

2012-03-05T15:21:00.000-04:00

Gradually the gaming companies were moving into and past the silly gimmick based controllers for video games. These things served to remove all connection between the player and the game. As Sony did with it's PS Move controller setup, Microsoft found it's own way to move into this realm. I would argue that Microsoft was more misguided than any of these things that I have written about in the prior articles.

Chapter 5: The Dis-Kinect of Microsoft

While I have never been one to champion the Xbox 360, I have always, at least, been able to say that it was a real hardcore gaming system. I feel like most of it's exclusives are misguided, especially Fable and Halo, but have always owned a 360 for Gears of War. At the end of the day, as a Playstation guy, I feel like our biggest disconnect has always been that I am not the target audience of Microsoft's console.

While Nintendo threw all of it's decades old fans to the wolves, the last thing I expected was the youngest of the big three to flip off it's fans and show things like this.

Seriously... That wasn't just one part of it's big E3 conference of last year. That was the tone of most of it. Microsoft basically said, "Hey kids! You like Battlefield? You like Call of Duty? We're announcing Halo 4! But let's talk about this stupid fucking camera that you can set on top of your TV you can and flail around like the products of inbreeding that you probably are."

It seems to me that many Xbox fans were upset by this, and justifiably so. It is also worth noting that with the exception of Forza 4 and Gears of War 3, I don't think Microsoft released one new exclusive game in the past year that wasn't just a vehicle for the Kinect.

For those of you who don't know, the Kinect is a camera that very accurately detects your movement and in some ways detects your voice. If you haven't tried it, I'm surprised, as it's sold over 11 million worldwide at this point, but oddly enough I've never seen one at anyone I know's home. Perhaps it's Kolect-ing dust underneath their Wiis.

The big concept of the Kinect is the for all of these years we actually haven't enjoyed playing video games because we've been using controllers and when we've been sleeping the controllers have been molesting babies and murdering your grandparents. This is honestly how Microsoft is making it sound. Arrogant Dipshit Kudo in the picture below actually went as far as to say that only now, with the Kinect, can we really play games.

Ok. That face has convinced me that I'm wrong about the Kinect. Controllers have always ruined video games. What cases do we have for the Kinect as an actual gaming device? Dance Central and it's sequel, an embarrassing looking Star Wars game, that at E3 even made people who were excited about it shudder, and mini game collections, because the Wii didn't give us enough of those. Out of everything, it is good for dance games. This hasn't reinvented the wheel, it's just a slightly advanced Playstation Eye Toy...which came out in 2003, and was treated and said to be exactly what it was. A camera that you could flail around in front of and hit cartoony objects on the screen.

Gaming has evolved a great deal and it keeps on growing and being able to do more, but these days there are too many resources being put in to making games do less for people who don't play games. Here's how it works. People who don't play games, rarely play because they don't know how to play. They don't play because they don't really feel like putting the time into learning, because video games aren't important to them. Kinect and Wii and Move just show these people that video gaming is as stupid and 'lowbrow' as they have always thought they were.

I love gaming. I love being engrossed in an experience. I love actually having a connection to the stories in video games, and I think a better way to get someone who doesn't play games interested, is to show them how much games are like movies now. My mom saw me play some Uncharted 3 the other day and now she is asking about getting "one of those machines".

If this misguided attempt is the best the game industry can come up with to grow the market, it's pretty sad. Games like Uncharted, Flower, Papo and Yo and other things to that effect are what is gonna make it happen. Not because they are the best games, but because they are trying to do bold things that non gamers don't realize gamers do. To win them over, we must finally put an end to the debate about whether or not video games are art. I know they are, but people think they aren't because they haven't seen good examples.

It's not about the way you play, so much as it's about making what you are playing worth learning.

Last Rebellion (PS3, 2010)

2012-02-29T11:57:00.001-04:00

My history with gaming goes back to the moment I met Mario. Mario was an overwhelming experience for my young mind, until Sonic the Hedgehog came along and showed me how much more intense that formula could be. So I saved up money from Christmas and birthdays and bought a Sega Genesis. I was confident that that was the best choice out there as, Mario just couldn't compete in my eyes. Then I went to my friends house and he showed me Chrono Trigger, and from that point on, JRPGs were a part of my life, especially my next find, Final Fantasy VI (my favorite game to this day). Needless to say the Japanese Role Playing Game format has been fading away as of late, with Final Fantasy XIII pretty much abandoning decent storytelling techniques in favor of trying to make Call of Duty loving American's like it's new fast paced action. Meanwhile, the Western style RPG has been growing greatly, being all about doing whatever you like, which is fun, but personally I miss the days of having a story so compelling that you yourself wanted to keep moving the plot forward. Ultimately, that lead me to, after beating Skyrim and Dark Void, dust off Last Rebellion which has been on my shelf for a bit. It's a JRPG, I wondered if it would fill the JRPG void in my life.

First off, in recent years, a large staple of Japanese games is to have overwhelmingly obnoxious characters as your protagonists and to have every conversation be about as wordy as a Dostoevsky (without any substance). That guy on the cover, his name is Nine. He's a prick and is always making things more difficult than they have to be. The girl, she's relatively logical magic type chick named Aisha, her arch is to realize that she should be more like him who does nothing but talk shit to everyone and whine a bunch. Also, they totally fall in love in less than 10 hours.

My other big gripe with this game is that it looks like an early Playstation 2 game, which doesn't matter that much, because my favorite game of all time looks like this.

This is easily one of my favorite moments in gaming history.

I had to mention it, but I was easily able to look past the visual problems. In spite of the bad graphics, I really liked all of the character designs and the level designs. The game shows you lots of beautiful places...in bad graphics. Still, it provides a unique experience in that respect.

The nice thing about Last Rebellion is the imagination that it puts forth. It's one of those classic Japanese feeling storylines, where there are two competing gods. One with the power of life, the other with the power of death. The life god has grown too powerful and is making it so that people and monsters aren't staying dead, thus the world is gradually becoming a monster paradise and they can't really be stopped. The death god then assigned two different types of people in this world to deal with the problem. There are Blades who are there to fight the monsters and Sealers who are there to seal their souls away so they won't come back. The main characters meet when Nine, the strongest of the Blades, is stabbed in the back and is dying and Aisha casts a forbidden spell to absorb his soul into her. Thus they set off on a journey to set things right, where only one can exist at a time. So if you're playing as him, you can abruptly change to her. This also works in combat, and allows you to attack a whole lot more because of it.

The big thing about this game is that the music is fantastic! It sets the mood very well and I often time would find myself just leaving on the main menu while working on other stuff, just to hear it. In fact, the music was way too good for this game, which is a terrible shame.

Overall, the joy of a JRPG is that you can sink 100 hours into an engrossing story and feel a great connection to the main characters while it happens. You know a JRPG has been successful, when you are watching the end credits out of respect, and reflecting on the great moments that you were lucky enough to experience. For this game, during the end credits, I was only thinking of how cool the music for this whole game was in spite of the nothingness that was the game. It was too easy, and finished with all side missions and everything in 11 hours. That's just depressing. It's a pretty terrible game, but at least I got a bit of that Japanese gaming that I've been missing.

Oh, by the way, I killed this dragon! That's 3 games in a row with dragon killing! Booyah!

Dark Void (PS3/X360, 2010)

2012-02-24T11:32:00.001-04:00

Dark Void inspires in me a great emotional response. This game does so much right and contained some of the best game design elements I have seen, but it also has it's fill of flaws. I bought this game for 5 dollars brand new a few months back. I bought it because I played the demo years ago and thought it had some potential, despite having heard nothing but terrible things over the years. Now that I've given it a full playthrough on the Hardcore difficulty I find myself torn on it as a whole.

First off, let me say, I found this game to be absolutely beautiful. On the graphic side of the fence, this game did a great job of showing us various different kinds of locations and having a beautiful cartoony character style that never falls into being too cartoony. When you have great visuals and pare it up with Nolan North of Uncharted fame's naturalistic voice acting, you really end up with something special.

The story blows my mind on this bad boy. I swear, the writers must have sat around and thought of their favorite conspiracy theories and decided to make a game out of it. It's hilarious. Lizard men who transform into world leaders? We got those. People vanishing in the Bermuda Triangle? Hell yes! Tesla didn't really die? Of course. UFOs? All over the place! You take all of those, put it in World War 2 and get a jetpack from Tesla, and the result is laughably awesome!

Throughout the game, you'll find yourself speeding through the sky shooting up UFOs and other things, and quickly landing on the ground to do some cover system gun fighting, which is very well executed, by the way. The controls handle great and it offers you the perfect amount of both types of combat. Flying through beautiful canyons, with waterfalls and battling UFOs with amazing music that puts me in mind of Battlestar Galactica, is a beautiful thing. Oh, and yeah, I did my research. It turns out the music is from Bear McCreary, the maker of the Battlestar Galactica theme. Honestly, there are so many elements coming together to make this game absolutely special, that it's overwhelming, so why all the negative reviews?

Dark Void is an ultimate concept of a game, with a lot of love put into it, but it seems like it was never finished. The development team behind this game apparently went out of business almost immediately after the games release, thus preventing them from being able to patch the glitches and so on, and that is a real shame. I was playing along, oblivously, when I reached what many would call the hardest part of the game, the battleship. After trying over and over again, I finally did it. Something weird happened though, it cut to a cut scene of the battleship crashing and burning and a guy said something to the effect of 'great job, come meet us', followed immediately by a screen that said mission failed. I was left scratching the side of my head for a few minutes, but I went back to it and tried again. Now whenever I flew where I was supposed to land, I would float into the battleship. I mean inside it, through a wall. I couldn't move, and the only way out was the fly into the wall and kill myself. This happened over and over again for about 60 minutes before I exited and reloaded my checkpoint. To my surprise, I was finally able to land, except, when I did what I was supposed to, it didn't play the cut scene that would allow me to advance...so I just flew around until I got killed. I need to remind you that this was incredibly hard, as well as the game refusing to let me pass. After about 60 minutes of that, I shut the system down and tried to figure out why my head was hurting so much. It seems I blew a few blood vessels in my eye. In hindsight, that was probably kinda serious. After I went back, and decided I had to give it one last try, I got by it, and it all worked swimmingly, and the rest of the game was a load of fun! Still, 3.5 hours for one battle, was definitely excessive.

I wish this game did better, so it could have been patched. Better yet, I wish Capcom gave the developers more money so they could properly finish this. It was so close to greatness and that is why this game is so disappointing. It even helped me with my whole dragon killing fetish...I suppose that's a spoiler. Anyway, I really want to recommend that you play this game, but I need you to understand that it has some big issues here and there. Hopefully, if you do give it a shot, you'll be able to see the hard work that went into this game and how special it really is. So if you actually try it, just set it to easy or something and enjoy the experience, for your health.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go play something remarkably easy to wind down. Perhaps Sly Cooper.

Skyrim (PS3/X360, 2011)

2012-02-20T12:24:00.001-04:00

Wow...just wow. I didn't want to play Skyrim, when it was just coming out. I played Oblivion for 200 hours and didn't do the first storyline mission, and quite frankly I have lots of games that I want to play and didn't want to waste my time doing fetch quests. Alas, Skyrim was already ten steps ahead of me. This game knew what I liked to do. It knew I liked to feel powerful, it knew I liked to explore and it knew that I love Sheogorath (The Lord of Madness). Skyrim was eager to give me all of these things, and still it somehow didn't drag on too long. Granted, with all of the exploring of a gigantic country, it took a little time, but unlike Oblivion where the enemies just got stronger as you did so you were always sneaking and praying you wouldn't die, you can actually explore freely and relatively safely...relatively. What I mean by that is that occasionally you'll be walking along when a large shadow sweeps over you and you know you are now experiencing what I call 'go time'.

Science has proven and dis-proven many things over the years, and as I'm sure you remember, from grade 4's biology class, dragons are always awesome. Hell...even Spyro is voiced by Elijah Wood. You can't be much more badass than that. Now, let me explain to you how you make it even more badass. A dragon lands on the ground in front of you. He's pissed off. He's storming towards you blowing fire at you, but you are ready for him. Suddenly you turn into a werewolf and charge right at this dragon's face. Suddenly waves of awesomeness start hitting people all over the world from the rippling effect of your great battle. People who have been in comas for years wake up and start moonwalking up and down hallways, all wars as we know it temporarily end, at least until this epic battle finishes, and Larry the Cable Guy actually says a few things that don't make me want to kick a hole in his head! Skyrim is that bloody awesome.

The best thing about this game is that every player get's their very own experience. Ask anyone about the best thing that's happened to them in the game, and sit back, light a camp fire and listen to it. My girlfriend used to ask me for routine morning emails every morning writing about the adventure I had the night before in Skyrim, and I would be so excited to tell her, based entirely on the unexpected nature of some of the adventures. Even the fetch quests weren't as plentiful this time around. I found that I was doing more interesting things than just running into a cave and finding some clumsy buggers dropped sword (though that was the first objective that I got).

My favorite encounter was at a time when I was sneaking along trying to avoid a bear, which at that point seemed to be going well, when suddenly I heard a loud roar. I knew what that was so I started running, of course making the bear come at me. That was bad news in itself, as that bear was stronger than me too. Suddenly the bear is attacking me and I'm trying to block it with my shield, when I see a big badass dragon land right behind it and start charging at both of us. After hitting the bear and I with some fire, the bear turns on the dragon. Yeah, a huge brown bear attacking a dragon. NICE! I used this opportunity to get away, but the bear didn't last for too long and the dragon quickly started his chase again. After about 2 minutes of running I came up to a road and saw two guards and decided to try to hold the line with them. The dragon landed and started attacking us, but we did very little damage and as soon as one of the guards fell, I knew it wasn't gonna work, so I took off running again. As predicted, the dragon didn't give up there and continued it's rage fuelled quest for supper.

At this point, I was so close to being dead that I figured I wasn't gonna make it, when I saw in the distance one last hope. Two giants are roaming around ahead of me so I run past them and the dragon touches down attacking them. The battle seemed to be going pretty close, so I jumped in and started hitting the dragon in the back in hopes that this would finally stop him, and to my heart's content, it actually worked. This was the 2nd dragon I ever killed, and it was definitely the strongest one up to that point. I was so pleased with my resourcefulness, that I... wait a second, I'm flying through the air. Yup, I forgot about the giants. So there I am, now being chased by two very powerful giants who are actually keeping up with me. This continues on for about 2 minutes when I reached the edge of a cliff. Basically, at this point I have to decide between dying by jumping, or dying by giant. Either way, killing that dragon isn't gonna count, so I'm sad. I decide to risk jumping, especially when I discover a very high waterfall. I dive into the water and am swept away, crashing into the water below. I'm hurt, but I'm still alive, and to my pleasure, there is a little mill next to the water, where I ran in to hide. All in a days work in Skyrim.

I know I just told a silly story about what happened to me walking from point A to B, but that's what Skyrim is all about. The game has plans for you, but those plans are different for everyone and that makes it special. I can't recommend this game enough. I was fortunate to not experience any serious bugs either. The game is overwhelmingly huge, so some bugs are expected, and apparently this game has plenty of them, but at most I only got some slowdown from time to time. If you're like me, and haven't played it yet, because you don't feel like you have enough time in your life, reconsider. It's a very special game, with a greatly simplified level and armor system and several unique and exciting experiences.

Tekken Hybrid (PS3, 2011)

2012-02-10T10:31:00.004-04:00

Tekken Hybrid? What's that all about? Let me tell you...I love Tekken. I may have even gone as far as to review their spellbinding movie on this very site. Anyway, after the disappointment that was said Tekken movie, I was deeply curious about what the upcoming Tekken Blood Vengeance CGI film was gonna be like. It was impressive when I finally saw the trailer, as the characters looked exactly like they were supposed to, and it actually looked like they were following the Tekken story (as loose as it is). The big thing that they showed that caught my attention was footage of Jin, Kazuya and Heihachi fighting each other. Nothing says Tekken better than that. So, let's go back to Tekken Hybrid. What is it? Tekken Hybrid is the movie Tekken Blood Vengeance, pared with an HD remake of Tekken Tag Tournement (the one that made me love Tekken in the first place) and a prologue demo of the upcoming Tekken Tag Tournement 2! That's a pretty easy sell for a guy like me, so I picked it up.

Tekken Tag Tournement 2 Prologue

My first stop on this bargain was the Tekken Tag Tournement 2 Prologue. Right away, I noticed that while most modes were open, there were only 4 characters to play as.We had Jin and Kazuya in their Devil forms (if you aren't a Tekken fan, I really can't explain it to you) with Xiaoyu (a dull girly charater) and Alisa (the robotic chick who ruined most of Tekken 6's scenario mode by being too happy and annoying). Oh well, at least we have two characters who aren't frustratingly stupid. I played it for a few minutes before deciding, there are no characters and I don't feel like playing anymore. Overall, it looks pretty much like a Tag version of Tekken 6 and handles about the same too. I guess it's alright, but it didn't sell me on Tekken Tag Tournement 2.

Tekken Tag Tournement HD

This is the reason I bought this anyway. It was me grabbing back a piece of my past. 11 years ago, I discovered that I liked fighting games, because my friend gave me his copy of Tekken Tag. Years have gone by, and the fighting game has evolved a great deal, so it was interesting to see how well this old game holds up. First off, the HD look is nice. The graphics are terribly under detailed, but in a way that adds to the timeless nature of this game. With full HD, it looks smooth and stylized. The gameplay on the otherhand, didn't fare so well. It still is a perfectly playable game, but for some reason there is an auto block feature on, where if your character is just standing around he automatically blocks everything. I don't like that. Not to mention, on several occasions I found myself struggling to even play it without using cheap tactics (Heihachi's back + right punch attack). Don't get me wrong, it's still a fine game, but I've encountered so much better out there with Street Fighter 4 or even Tekken 6. I don't see me sinking hundreds of hours into this one, like I did back in the day.

Tekken Blood Vengeance

Oh boy, here we go again...another Tekken movie. The live action one blew it, but this was actually made by Namco. It can't be that bad. The basic plot is that a crazy powerful business man throws a tournement and whoever wins it takes control of his company. There are of course subplots between many of the characters, as well as rivalries and so on, such as Jin's rivalry with his father, Kazuya who has a rivalry with his father Heihachi...and so on. Look...all that matters is that it isn't following any of the lame characters from Tekken...

Uh...huh... so...behold. Xiaoyu and Alisa are our main characters...

Yeah, so I shit you not... the movie follows these two on a journey through high school to try to get the attention of a boy...who isn't even a character in the games.... Don't worry, two Tekken characters are jammed into this movie as teachers too! Anyway, they both are supposed to find this mystery boy for whatever reason... (I've seen it and I forget already) for Jin and Kazuya who are trying to one up eachother. Again, by finding some random boy who Jin apparently went to school with at one point, two of the worlds most powerful men will be able to one up eachother.

Somehow they manage to pad out this girly BS story for the first hour and ten minutes of the movie. They eventually end up with a huge confrontation between Heihachi, Jin and Kazuya at the very end. This battle would have been much more interesting if we were building toward it, but oh well. At least this movie acknowledged that those 3 characters are so far out of Xiaoya and Alisa's league that it's insane. The big final battle goes on for about 20 minutes and is easily one of the coolest things I've seen in a while, but this movie doesn't get a free pass as it ends with a huge cop-out and goes right back to the two blandest Tekken characters talking about friendship.

My friend gave an analogy of this whole movie that I think, despite it's vulgarity, sums it up pretty well. Picture an incredibly beautiful girl who wants to pleasure you better than you've ever been pleasured before, but only under the circumstances that she will bite your business for over an hour before she does it. After finally making it through the most nightmarish pain of your life, it all turns around and feels great, however, just when you are about to reach your happy peek, she starts biting you again.

This movie is a psychotic dominatrix, and if you are into pain, I highly recommend it to you.

Overall
I can't recommend this purchase. Tekken Tag HD is the only real selling point here, but even then, it's a little too dated now. The demo makes me sick for putting those two stupid characters in, and the movie does the exact same. I don't know what the hell the story writer was thinking but I hope he gets the dominatrix treatment mentioned above.