Blog For Self Improvement

Forgiveness Means Setting Yourself Free

2012-01-27T10:13:00.001-08:00

Forgiveness is something that many people struggle with on a daily basis. If you take out a pen and paper, or just make a mental list, you could probably think of at least 10, 50, or even 100 people whom you have a resentment towards. Most people have them, and most people believe that they are justified in having them. Choosing to be peaceful is always more powerful than wanting to be right, though.

When you choose to forgive, you are actually taking back your own personal power. You are putting your own inner peace above holding onto hostility and anger. Staying continuously angry at someone only gives them your power, as if you are a puppet with that person maneuvering the strings.

What is the Purpose of Holding Onto Resentments?

The main purpose is that we feel like forgiving someone is letting them off the hook and excusing them for what they did. We may think it is sending a message that what happened is okay. Forgiveness, though, has nothing to do with that other person and everything to do with us. We forgive for ourselves and our own peace of mind.

Holding onto a resentment is similar to hoisting a 200 pound weight up a mountain. The more you go along, the heavier and heavier that weight feels. The more that you move through life with those resentments, the more that they will eat away at you and possibly manifest into the physical in the form of illness or disease.

Another reason that people hold on so tightly to resentments is because there is something deep within them that feels like the past should and could have been different. I heard Oprah Winfrey say something very powerful recently. She said that, "forgiveness is letting go of the idea that the past could be any different than what it was."

This was an eye-opening moment for me when I heard this because there is so much truth to it. By refusing to forgive and let go, we are refusing to accept that the past was the way that it was and there is nothing that can be done to change it.

That is the first step to forgiveness:

1. Acceptance - The first step in making any lasting change in our lives is accepting what is. This in no way means that what happened was okay, but rather just an inner acceptance that it happened and then making a conscious choice to move forward from there.

There is nothing that can be done to change the situation no matter how hard we try. One of the most painful things for people is refusing to accept the reality of things. Thinking that something should be different than what it is in the moment only causes us to spin our wheels. We can, however, make a choice to create changes in our lives and to create the reality that we desire.

2. Bring the Focus to Yourself - How can anyone move forward when they are constantly rehashing the same old thoughts in their head? We play that same tape over and over of what that person did and we then get angry all over again. I know, I have done this many times myself and still catch myself replaying the tape again.

What helps me is to become aware of when I am doing this. It means being aware of the thoughts that enter your mind throughout the day and assessing whether they are productive or unproductive. If you notice yourself playing out what that other person did, stop and look at yourself. What was the role that you played in the situation? How could you have done things differently?

3. Put Yourself Into Their Shoes - Next, you can take a moment to place yourself into the other person's shoes and view life from their perspective. Perhaps they have their own deep, personal issues that have never been dealt with and in fact, it was nothing personal against you at all. You just happened to be in the midst of the crossfire.

Usually when people are pretty unhappy within, they treat others in similar ways that they treat themselves. It is the same when someone feels great and is content. They are more than likely nicer and more loving because that is how they treat themselves.

Practice having compassion for the person and for where they are at in their lives. If they were a conscious, aware person, I doubt that they would have behaved in the same way.

4. Forgive Yourself - Have you completely forgiven yourself for actions that you have done in your life or supposed mistakes (aka great learning experiences) that you made? Maybe now is a good time to start because if you are unforgiving towards others, then you are probably unforgiving towards and hard on yourself, too.

There is nothing that can be done to change the past. Plus, I know that when I have done things in my life that later caused me to cringe, it is because I was a different person back then and in a different state of mind. Hindsight is usually 20/20. I am sure that the person that I am today would act and react differently, so it is time to practice some Self-love regarding the situation.

Most of us have had those types of moments in our lives, so just know that others have definitely experienced similar things. When you can forgive yourself and are kind and loving to yourself, it makes it far easier to do the same with others.

Forgiveness is rarely easy, yet is so simple. It is a matter of making a conscious choice, moment by moment, to practice compassion and understanding as resentful thoughts come up. Pretty soon, after this is practiced enough, a new way of being sets in. A way of being that is more loving and peaceful. Our focus and attention can then be placed on other matters rather than being stuck in the past.

Can you think of someone at this moment that you can forgive? If so, send them your love and set yourself free.

Victoria is currently a writer for the mind, body, spirit blog http://www.TheVictoriousYou.com. If you enjoyed this article, you can join her mailing list and follow her on Facebook (TheVictoriousYou) and Twitter (VictoriousYou).

Published At: Forgiveness Means Setting Yourself Free

Photo: bigjom / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Ten Signs You Need to Get Organized

2012-01-26T00:53:00.000-08:00

1. You have no idea what is buried in that pile, box, drawer or cabinet.

Quick Solution: Go through each area thoroughly. Throw out what you no longer need, remove the items that do not belong, group similar items together and make sure each remaining item is clearly visible and/or labeled for easy access.

2. You are always looking for a lost item.

Quick Solution: Designate a permanent place (example: in a basket, in a drawer, on top of a desk) to store the item you are always losing and make sure to place it there whenever it’s not in use.

3. You are running out of space in your home.

Quick Solution: Throw out items you are no longer using, utilize hidden storage areas (such as underneath the stairs), hang items and stack more items in a vertical position rather than horizontally.

4. You see clutter piling up everywhere around you.

Quick Solution: Tackle one area and/or pile at a time.

5. You have no spare time.

Quick Solution: Schedule it in.

6. Your schedule is very hectic.

Quick Solution: Prioritize your schedule. Combine errands so you aren’t making as many trips. Stock up on items to help prevent last minute trips to the store.

7. You are consistently late for appointments.

Quick Solution: Start your daily schedule 15 minutes earlier and give yourself extra time to account for unexpected delays.

8. You are not meeting your financial goals.

Quick Solution: Layout your entire financial picture on paper (include income, expenses, debt, investments, future goals, etc.) and evaluate what needs to be changed.

9. You are feeling stressed.

Quick Solution: Schedule in some “me time” and take that time to relax.

10. You purchased an item again simply because you couldn’t find the original one.

Quick Solution: All items in your home should have a designated storage place. If you have an item that does not have a designated storage place, choose one for it. Label all boxes with all contents inside and any item that is not packed away in a clearly labeled container should be kept visible at all times.

For more articles, FREE weekly organizational tips and product recommendations

OR to purchase a copy of the newest book written by Christina Scalise,

please visit our website at……. www.OrganizeYourLifeAndMore.com

Photo: Michal Marcol / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

15 Ways To Release Stress

2012-01-25T03:52:00.001-08:00

Are you stressed?

Do you have ongoing bad mood and you feel like the whole world is your enemy?
Do you feel under tremendous pressure that is hardly bearable?
Do you hear your family and friends complaining of the bad treatment they receive from you?

It is now time to act.

How?

Look at the following tips:

1. Learn to say no. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed and stressed because we take on everything people ask from us. Be selective and think over what is what you really want to take on.

2. Express your needs. How often does it happen that we are angry that things don't happen the way we want. And then we realise that we did not even tell what or how we want. Don't be shy, tell to others your needs and wants.

3. Relax. Find out what helps you relaxing. It could be yoga or meditation, breathing or massage for you, everyone has different methods for this.

4. Give yourself a break. How? Go away for the weekend to somewhere nice, treat yourself to a bath, a nice film or candlelight dinner. Decorate your home with flowers, read a good book in a park. The number of possibilities is illimited.

5. Make time for your hobbies. Sometimes focussing on one matter contributes to having a high stress level. Put aside some time for your hobbies and see how this will fill you with energy again.

6. Talk to people. Surround yourself with positive people, talk to them, or just listen to them. They might inspire you or help you out, even if just as a sounding board.

7. Give out your feelings. Find a way to express your feelings. Talk to others or write a diary or just hit your pillow.

8. Prioritize. When you are overwhelmed with lots of things on your to-do list, find out what is important and urgent and deal with those things first.

9. Keep to a regular schedule. Habits can help you reduce your stress level.

10. Have a constructive self-talk to yourself. Don't talk negatively of yourself and stop with negative beliefs like "I am not worth anything", "Even for this job I was rejected" etc.

11. Do some sports. Sports are a very good way of decompressing yourself, you can use the energy here that you would spend on dealing with your stress for other purposes. And it is also healthy!

12. Eat healthy food. Make sure your body and mind receives what it is ought to receive and that it has the right nutritive intake.

13. Ask yourself: is it really worth? Is the subject really worth upsetting yourself or stressing you? Will stress help you? Probably not, so why do it?

14. Get professional help. Talk to your coach or therapist to help you move out from your negative mood.

15. Take note of positives. Even if you feel you have the worst day of your life, there is always something positive happening as well. Make a list of positives, even if just small and remind yourself of these rather than on negative outcomes.

"The time to relax is when you don't have time for it."

Erika Kalmar is a career coach, developer of the Career Wellness CoachingTM concept, founder of the Terpsichori Coaching company and member of the International Coach Federation. Having spent the last 10 years in recruitment, she realised the importance of career wellness as opposed to career success and applies this in her approach with clients. She is working with those 70% of people who want to bring in more balance and fulfilment in their career lives, by offering f*ree career tools, articles, career support community and coaching.

Have a look at her f*ree career tools, articles and career support community. Get your f*ree report "Coach Yourself to Career Wellness". Claim your copy here: http://www.careerwellnesscoach.com/free-report.

Published At: 15 Ways To Release Stress

Photo: David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

3 Quotes That Make Self-Improvement 'Simple'

2012-01-24T06:51:00.000-08:00

How to improve oneself?

Well, it could be as simple as reading this self-improvement article, but I seriously doubt it.

It could be as simple as listening (and watching) how others do it, but you know better than just to rely on the actions of others don't you.

Or it could be taking right action, relentlessly so...

Or it could be a combination of all of the above, taking right actions as guided to do so by those who have done similarly, but always remembering to rely on your judgment.

This article will attempt to prove the case for the last option - taking the right sorts of actions, right for you that is. And I include 3 self-improvement quotes to help make that case...

Self-Improvement Quote #1:

"People seldom improve when they have no other model but themselves to copy."
-- Oliver Goldsmith

Learning from others is pretty much how we learn to do most things as a child, I'm sure you'll agree. And when we become a teenager the influence of our peers is not far away. And then adulthood hits us, and we know all we need to know to do life 'our way'.

Except we don't. What we really know is that some parts of 'life' come easier for us than others; that maintaining successful relationships can be frustrating; and that the 'life skills' class seems to a never-ending one whose lessons get harder and harder.

Truth is, we can bumble along in life, blaming others for our failures and taking sole praise for our successes, or we can realise that it is ALWAYS useful to find a mentor or two to model ourselves on.

The mentor could be a family member or a friend or even a famous faraway type. But some kind of role model is always useful to be guided by, when it comes to developing certain aspects of our self.

Else you might find yourself seriously stuck in life, and making the same mistakes over and over again...

Self-Improvement Quote #2:

"Employ your time in improving yourself by other men's writings so that you shall come easily by what others have labored hard for."
-- Socrates

Sometimes it's okay to learn from so-called self-help 'gurus'. Some of these people have struggled a great deal in life so that they now come to an understanding of how much easier life is when you take X action and have Y attitude.

These learned men and women understand themselves really well, and (usually) have a good way of explaining their reality so that it becomes your reality.

Then their journey, which might have taken a lifetime, can help shorten your own journey, as long - of course - as you DO what these people suggest you do, trusting your judgemental as you do so...

Self-Improvement Quote #3:

"I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand."
-- Confucius

If you don't take actions, even the opposite actions to what some 'guru' suggests you take, then you're going nowhere in your journey of life - nowhere, slow. Development and growth can ONLY occur by your taking actions, preferably right actions.

So you put into practice what your mentor suggests; you do what the self-help guru urges you to do, also; and then, then you see how it works out in your life, and adjust accordingly.

As long as you take right actions, and reflect on how it actually works for you, then you'll grow as a human being... guaranteed!

And if you find that some of these so-called 'right actions' don't actually work then even better. Just as long as you know what DOES work for you, you can maybe become a self-help guru of your own and then come full circle and end up helping others shorten their life-journeys too.

And you can find many other self improvement ideas, contributed by many, beginning at this page - http://www.selfhelpcollective.com/self-improvement-ideas.html

From Steve M Nash - Editor of SelfHelpCollective.com

Published At: 3 Quotes That Make Self-Improvement 'Simple'

7 Motivational Tips: Life Lessons from Rock Bottom

2012-01-20T06:52:00.000-08:00

You can learn a lot from hitting rock bottom. It’s a terrible place to be and I don’t wish it upon anyone – but the lessons I learned have carried with me ever since it happened. Today, I’m a licensed clinical social worker who specializes in helping others break free from the cycle of addiction. I’m currently writing my first book called Life Lessons from Rock Bottom – and below is a sneak peak of it.

I’m ready to share my experiences with you, in the hope that even the small things I learned can help you in a big way. Here is some of the best advice I’ve found to help get motivated – even in the most difficult of times:

Make your goals public. Whatever it is you’re struggling with, let a friend or family member know. You should also share your goals with them and choose one person to be your “confessional.” If you don’t do something you said you were going to, tell them. Being honest with them can help you get it off your chest so you don’t have to feel guilty about it and instead can clear your head and move on.

Learn from your mistakes. Many people are so afraid of making a mistake that they don’t take risks. Looking back, I’ve never made a mistake (big or small) that I didn’t learn an important lesson from. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes.

Find your slogan or mantra. It can be a bible verse, meditation passage, or even something you make up on your own. Find a passage that speaks to you and motivates you. When you’re struggling or feel discouraged, take a few deep breaths and repeat the passage in your head.

Be active. No matter what it is you’re struggling with, experts have proven that exercise can help calm your mind and even make you more productive. Get out there and do something, whether it’s a short jog, a walk through your neighborhood or maybe even a gym class. Getting away for exercise will not only help you live a healthier lifestyle, but will also help take your mind off of things and perhaps even give you a new perspective.

Step out of your comfort zone. Trying something new can be scary, but it’s also necessary for change, and I’ve learned that great discoveries can be made when you step outside of your comfort zone.

Stay “in the moment.” This is one of those things that helped me the most – remembering that this moment is precious and it could be all we have. Whether you’ve been putting off finding a job, going to the gym, or something else entirely, remind yourself that this moment is it. And if you waste it, you may not get another chance.

Dedicate an hour or more each day for “you” time. One of the biggest ways to grow as a person is to spend time on personal development. Set aside one hour each day and do something that makes you happy. Take a yoga class, read a good book, or listen to an inspirational audiobook.

Keep in mind the above tips if you’re in a bad place and need a little motivation. They’re just a sneak peek into the many things I have to share with you.

About the Author

Angela Weber's a licensed clinical social worker specializing in addiction recovery and writing her first book - Life Lessons from Rock Bottom based on personal and professional observations from the past 20 years of her life.

Photo: Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

How To Choose The Right Friends

2012-01-15T06:36:00.000-08:00

Stay away from toxic relationships, for your own safety and protection. What are toxic relationships? They are relationships which are dangerous, because of the character of the persons befriended. Friendships are an important part of life, vital to our over-all growth and development as human beings. In this day and time, to have just two or three good, wholesome and real friends is a blessing. In an age when we must watch the company we keep and do our best to avoid bad company, it is up to us to ensure that we choose friends who practice good habits and who are authentic in godly behavior. The Holy Bible warns us that evil companionships and associations corrupt and deprave good manners and morals. (1 Corinthians 15:33, The Amplified Bible) This means that the company we keep can influence us for the worst if we do not choose our friends wisely.
But how can we determine what friendships are good for us and what friendships are not? I firmly believe that it is not difficult to make the right decisions when it comes to friendships. But it does take strength, for we will have to be willing to pull away from the people who exhibit negative and destructive attitudes and behaviors. This takes both discernment and guts.

Here are a few tips for choosing and developing good friendships. I am aware that people can change, but my encouragement is that if someone is practicing wrong, improper and ungodly behavior, avoid that person. If they revisit and improve their character, and over time, prove that they have really changed, then you can develop friendship with them, with caution.

1. Decide what kind of friends you want to have.

2. When entering a new friendship, carefully discern and ponder what kind of the things the person or persons are into. What do they like to do? Are their actions good, wholesome and godly? If they are liars, then you may want to avoid their friendships. If they love picking fights, and are of a violent disposition, then stay away from them. If they drink and take toxic drugs, run. Get away from them. And if they do not practice the previous, but hang with those who do, stay away from them all. What they are doing may look like fun, but these practices are destructive and should be avoided at all costs.

3. Learn to be yourself and let people desire your friendship, who will receive you for who you are. So many people try to be somebody else, just to have friends and hang out with the so-called right crowd. But true friendships are the result of people being able and free to be themselves. So do not compromise your originality for the sake of friendships. Believe me when I say that there are people who want to be your friends, who will appreciate you for being yourself.

Sheldon D. Newton is an inspirational and motivational speaker, teacher, pastor and seminar lecturer. He is the Founder and Senior pastor of Jesus Christ Centered Ministries International and the author of various books including, Refuse to Live the Common Life, The Positive Power of Biblical Affirmations, Humility and the Honor of God and True Spirituality, available at http://amzn.to/truespirituality

His burning purpose is to see lives transformed through the application of timeless and godly principles, which will enable them to live better lives of peace, wholeness and fulfillment. This purpose has taken him throughout the islands of the Bahamas, The United States of America and The British Virgin Islands.

Photo: photostock / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The Best Ways to Cope With Grief

2012-01-10T06:46:00.000-08:00

One of the most painful episodes in your life will definitely be losing one of your loved ones. The circumstance doesn’t matter. The level of pain is almost the same. There will be times when you’re struggling to come to terms with it. A lot of people fall into deep loneliness or depression. In fact, some would also choose to end their lives.

Grief is a very powerful emotion, which can be a positive or a negative one depending on how you handle it. When it’s a good grief, it means you’re mourning for the loss but you’ve already reached a level of acceptance. It becomes something dangerous if it turns out to be a negative emotion for you.

If you are finding it quite hard to deal with grief and loss, the following tips may be helpful to you:

1. Start the process of acceptance

There are actually different stages of grief. You may start from denial to desperation and eventually into acceptance. It’s recommended that you are very aware of this, so you know what level you are in. The goal is to get into the acceptance part as fast as possible, so you can completely move on with your life.

2. Learn to grieve with others

Now is the best time to share your grief with others, such as the rest of the family members or friends. You will know that you are definitely not alone with what you’re going through. Sometimes you can draw strength and inspiration from the ones who have already learned to accept the fate. They can help you get to that point too.

3. Share good memories

Many people tend to not talk about the deceased for fear that sharing will only bring back the sad memories. That’s actually fine, but you know sometimes you good memories can also lighten up the mood. Besides, surely the dead wants you to remember them when they are at their best. Honor their memory and life by sharing any pleasant memories you have with him/her.

4. Join support groups

There are plenty of grief support groups you can join. Some of them have already formed chapters in your area. If you go to the Internet, there are message boards and websites you can check out. They usually have professional counselors who can help you understand the grief you’re feeling, as well as teach you some methods on how to cope with the pain of losing.

5. Use subliminal messages

How can subliminal messages help you with your grief? These types of messages have the ability to change your perspective on things, even your negative thought patterns. Subliminal messages get into your subconscious, so it’s something you have no full control. However, you can tap them if you wish to change something negative to positive.

Some of the subliminal messages or affirmations you can use during grief are the following:

I am taking care of myself.
I place a high value in my life.
I accept life’s natural process called death.
I acknowledge the pain, but I won’t let it control me.

About Nelson Berry: Nelson Berry is The Pioneer of Subliminal Messages Online. Click Here Now for 4 Free Subliminal Messages Video Downloads (valued at $160)!

Photo: Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Top Ten Tips for Balance Between Home and Work

2012-01-09T07:17:00.000-08:00

In my never ending quest for the perfect balance between work and home, and friends and clients, I have been blessed with many great mentors and the opportunity to learn countless lessons for myself and from others. Many of these tips are hard-fought for me. And so, in honor of David Letterman's famous "Top Ten," here are my top ten tips on getting to balance.

Number 10: Use one calendar. It sounds simple, but put your personal and your business commitments in the same place so you can quickly see what you have going on and make intentional decisions about where you want to spend your time. How many times has it happened that you inadvertently scheduled a work commitment (or a doctor's appointment) on top of your child's school assembly?

Number 9: If you work from home or have the luxury of a flexible work day, set a specific start and end time for your work day. Set clear boundaries so that you do not end up doing "that one more thing" that takes you through dinner time.

Number 8: Never go to bed angry. Resolve whatever the problem is before you head off for bedtime. Trust me, you will sleep better and feel better. Apologize even if you did not start the fight.

Number 7: Take all your vacation days! What are you saving them for?

Number 6: Don't keep up with the Joneses. Meaning, don't worry about what everyone else is doing, or how many committees they are on, or what activities they pack into their days. Define what balance means to you, and stick to it. I once had a business owner tell me that I couldn't run my business in just 40 hours a week - and for him, 60 hours was just fine. But guess what? I found a way. You need to find your own way to achieve your balance, not somebody else's definition of balance.

Number 5: Listen to your body. Really listen. Your body will tell you when it needs a break. This tip is particularly hard, because we become experts at ignoring warning signs. Begin to pay attention to what your body is saying - build that habit of actively listening to when your body tells you it is worn out, or not eating right, or getting sick.

Number 4: If you don't block time for exercise or physical activity, it won't happen. Make an appointment to go to the gym, or play tennis, or join your son in a pick-up basketball game.

Number 3: Laugh as often as you can. Find ways to bring laughter into your day. Watch a comedy; listen to the comedy station on your radio; call your favorite jokester friend.

Number 2: Set consistent sleep patterns. This is not just about the number of hours of sleep you get every night (although that's important too). In addition, get in the habit of going to sleep and rising at about the same time every day. Yes, that includes the weekends. Try it, you will thank me.

And, the Number 1 Tip for Balance: Make time for what is most important to you. Have you ever heard the story of the Mayonnaise Jar, the Rocks, and the Two Beers? In that story, a professor tells his class about the "big rocks". Those big rocks represent the most important things in your life. If you fill the mayonnaise jar with all the little things (the "pebbles") then you won't have room for the big rocks. Put the big rocks in first, the rest will find a space somewhere.

If you want a copy of the full Mayonnaise Jar story, contact us. We would be delighted to share it with you. And let us know which of these Top Ten Tips is more valuable for you? What other tips can you share with our readers?

Robyn Rickenbach, President of Springboard International Inc., is an innovative, strategic thinker with proven success in executing critical business objectives, making teams successful and facilitating collaborative decision making and planning. She has an intense focus on human capital improvement, learning and performance, and organizational development areas, with 20 years experience in a variety of market sectors and verticals. Learn more at http://www.springboardintl.com or email her at robyn@springboardintl.com

Published At: Top Ten Tips for Balance Between Home and Work

Photo: Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Grow Old With a Lot of Grace

2012-01-08T07:12:00.001-08:00

Whether you like it or not, you are going to grow old. Your skin will start to wrinkle, and your breasts will start to sag. You will feel more emotionally imbalanced, blaming it on the hormones. These changes are inevitable, but that does not mean you cannot grow old with grace, poise, and a lot of inner beauty.

Watch what you eat

Do you know that obesity can make you feel and look older than your actual age? It is not impossible to be 40 and have the body and health of a 60-year-old woman. That is why you need to watch out what you eat. Focus more on fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. Start weaning yourself from meat, especially red meat. If you need protein, you can source it out from beans.

Exercise

You need to keep your body robust and strong. Besides, the more you remain idle, the higher are the chances of developing atrophy, which means your muscles are damaged due to disuse. It is very easy for you to feel pain on different parts of the body, such as your back, shoulders, and knees. Exercise can also keep your metabolism in check. It tends to slow down as you get older.

Do not allow your confidence to slide down

The more you grow old, the more you should be confident of yourself. Just think of the wisdom you have gathered after all these years. To continuously boost your confidence, you can recite some mantras or subliminal messages. Practice the following while closing your eyes or looking yourself at the mirror:

I am confident of my body.
I embrace getting old.
I welcome the wisdom that comes with age.
I am not trapped to my past.

The subliminal messages will create a powerful change into your manner of thinking. If you can just recite these subliminal messages over and over, you will discover they begin to make up your new set of beliefs. You will become more open to age and wisdom.

Be childlike

How do you become childlike? It’s actually finding beauty in everything that you see. It’s all about being honest and embracing the changes that are happening around you. It’s all about being secure in the state you are in and just choosing to be happy with what life has dealt you.

Explore new horizons

Age should not stop you from achieving the things you want to accomplish in your life. Go back to school and learn a new skill. Take up a new hobby. Go out with friends or travel. If you’re single or divorced, find a date. Life is actually fun if you allow yourself to have some fun.

Love

Love is a very powerful emotion. In fact, as they say, it makes the world tick. It makes people happy. With love, you will discover that you can still contribute something to the world. With love, you will realize you do count to others. Allow yourself to feel it. Let it surround you as you grow old.

About Nelson Berry: Nelson Berry is The Pioneer of Subliminal Messages Online. Click Here Now for 4 Free Subliminal Messages Video Downloads (valued at $160)!

Photo: Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Time Management Tips: 10 Things You Can Do To Be Effective With Your Time

2012-01-06T02:57:00.001-08:00

If you find yourself constantly frustrated at the end of the day, with a pile of things that need to be done and wondering why you weren’t able to do it, you’re not alone. Plenty of people suffer from an inability to make the maximum use of their time, but there is a solution! By implementing these simple time management tips in every area of your life, you’ll be surprised at what you can accomplish – and how quickly things will get done – every day.

1) Know what you want – set goals.

Since you can’t change time itself, you need to change how you work with time. This can be done by making small personal goals to start with, moving to larger goals as you progress in your time management skills. For example, set a goal to not check your personal email while at work for one week. At the end of the week, evaluate whether you achieved that goal and add another one or try again.

2) Do what you need to – create a plan.

This is a more overarching goal, but something that can be implemented as part of a plan for time management success. For example, your plan for trying these time management tips might be to increase your productivity or to lower your stress levels.

3) Learn about yourself – where are you losing time?

For a week, track what you do every day. Take note of your activities, how long they took, and even the breaks you take for a personal phone call or for lunch. After a week, look at the areas that took up your time, and evaluate where you wasted time that could have been given over to more productive activities.

4) Use the available tools – write it down.

Time management tools are an effective way to give concreteness to your goals and the tasks you need to accomplish. Whether it’s through a daytimer or a computer program, physically manage your time by listing the tasks you need to do now and in the future.

5) Keep perspective – prioritize.

Each morning, look at the tasks you need to accomplish and prioritize them. Figure out which ones are urgent and which ones can honestly wait if you don’t have time for them. Do the important things first – don’t put them off, or you’ll be stressed and rushed at the end of the day.

6) Keep moving – create a routine.

If you have an established routine, you’ll be more able to complete your goals each day. When crises arise, move with them and deal with them – but don’t let them distract you for the rest of the day. Once you’ve dealt with the problem, get back on task.

7) Don’t dawdle – set time limits.

If you only need an hour to check your email, set a timer for an hour until you can get used to that amount of time. A day can be easily wasted on one thing if you let it, so this will ensure that you don’t waste extra time surfing around that could be spent on other projects.

8) Ask for help – delegate.

You don’t need to do it all yourself – no person is an island! Allow others to carry some of the burden for you, but be willing to help them along the way – that way your creative hand is still in the pot. You need to decide to delegate, and then just ask. What’s the worst that could happen, someone would say no? It’s not the end of the world.

9) Know yourself – don’t waste time waiting.

Whether it’s standing in line at the grocery store, waiting for a doctor’s appointment, or even if you’re sitting in a lobby waiting for a meeting, realize that you don’t need to spend that time waiting. With a task list set out, bring something with you at all times that you can work on – a report to read, a notepad, your checkbook, or your PDA to check your email. Keep moving, keep working on those tasks. Don’t let a moment go to waste.

10) Be realistic – don’t get discouraged.

If you’ve set realistic goals and you’ve followed the tips outlined here, there may still be some days that you just can’t get everything done. That’s okay! There are only 24 hours in a day, and all you can do is work with them and manage yourself. Time doesn’t change – you can, and that’s really the best thing you can do. Realize that some days will be successes and others may be a little more disappointing. That’s life – and tomorrow is a new day!

About Adam Thompson: Save time! Get top quality, valuable, time-saving scripts that will take care of business for you, leaving you more time to make more money elsewhere at a very reasonable price at http://www.yourfreeworld.com/script

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Anger Management In Eight Steps

2012-01-05T02:52:00.001-08:00

Read any paper today and you find news of violence caused by anger. School shootings, road bullying, workplace rudeness, domestic violence and almost all conflicts between couples are caused by uncontrolled anger. Many large and respected studies have found that at least one third of all marriages have episodes of domestic violence. Studies have also found that at least a million kids in the USA are physically assaulted in their homes. Uncontrolled anger can destroy personal and professional relationships.
What is anger?

Anger is not one emotion but a cocktail of emotions connected to our brains and behaviour. Once anger starts, we start to experience change through the body. And that change prepares the body to face threat or what it perceives as threat. The feeling of anger originates in the limbic system of the brain, around the mid part of the brain. Amygdala, which is part of this system stores emotional memories and this actually triggers angers from the past on top of what you are experiencing in the present. We cannot control the amygdala from sending you “old anger” but we can control our respond to it.

Angry feelings are “hard-wired” in humans. It is part of survival. It is part of our protection dating back to the days when our ancestors were hunting for lunch and running the risk ending up as lunch themselves. It is impossible to never get angry not to mention absurd and that is not anger management.

Anger management is about choosing our respond to the situations that makes us angry. Anger management is about harnessing the energy released by anger into something useful. Those who manage their angers enjoy a healthy relationship with others and get more of the needs fulfilled.

Mastering anger is not easy but with the right help and guidance it can be achieved. The eight steps described below are helpful tips to manage anger.

Step 1 – Recognize Stress

Stress is the usual trigger that changes our mood from feeling calm and peaceful to being angry. Whether the cause of stress is internal or external, our brain activates an old powerful defence mechanism, the “fight or flight” response. Thus it important to recognize stress and bring it under control before it anger creeps in.

Step 2 - Learn to Empathize

Remember that everyone is fighting their own battle in life. Be aware of the mood of people around you and their feelings on certain subjects. The ability to accurately sense emotions around us helps us to make positive and enriching connections with our fellow humans.

Step 3 – Don’t React But Respond

Do not react to situations. When you feel a rush of blood to the head, pause and think. Remember that you have a choice. And you are in charge. You will find that feeling of not letting others control; you liberating.

Step 4 – Change the Self-Talk

An important tool in managing anger is the way you talk to yourself. Learn to change the self –talk empowers you to effectively deal with anger in terms of how strongly you feel and how you express your anger.

Step 5 – Use Assertive Communication

Being assertive is not the same as being aggressive. Being assertive communicator means using the right words, tone and body language to effectively and honestly convey our feelings to others. This is far more powerful than being aggressive.

Step 6 – Be Realistic

When you set your expectations too high and find that it is not met, more often than not you will find yourself angry. Learn to be flexible in your expectations and always be alert of the realities of life.

Step 7 – Learn to Forgive

Most anger management coach will tell you that this is the most important step in letting go of angers. Learning to forgive others who we feel had hurt us demands a lot from us and it is never easy. But we have to learn to forgive for our own sake and peace of mind.

Step 8 – Retreat, Relax and Ponder

The daily grind of life can take its toll on the human body and soul. It is important that you retreat and learn to slow your mind and ponder upon your life. You can do this daily before retiring every night or weekly, but whatever your preferred method, do not miss it.

You must keep in mind that anger can cause you to live a life full of regrets and to lean to manage it is utmost important to the quality of life you wish to lead.

About A. Majid: Learn how you can use anger management tools to achieve peace of mind and develop enriching personal and professional relationships at Anger Coach

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Achievement - What Are Some Traits of Extraordinary People?

2012-01-04T03:21:00.001-08:00

"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man." Bernard Shaw.'The unreasonable man', mentioned by Bernard Shaw, refers to the extraordinary leaders, scientists, and entrepreneurs who redefined the world with their inspiring personality, discoveries, and business strategies. Throughout history, we can find many extraordinary human beings who helped mankind reach new heights with their great innovation and hard work. All of these great individuals shared certain traits that helped them become what they were, extraordinary. Below is a list of 5 traits that some of these extraordinary people have shared.

Strong Belief

Be it Edison who discovered electricity or Einstein who discovered the Relativity Theory, each one of these men strongly believed in themselves. When faced with opposition from the norm or what was possible, these men had unwavering belief in their ideas and 'what could be'. The saying, "faith can move a mountain", came true in the lives of both Edison and Einstein.

Extraordinary people never change their views or ideas, no matter what happens to them. Galileo, the astronomer who first proposed that the Sun lies in the center of the solar system, stood by his words even when people accused him to be mad and threw stones at him. Such is the power of their belief.

Minute Observation

Extraordinary people have amazing powers of observation. For many, it is the key to their success. Henry Ford was famous for noticing minute miscalculations in his annual report without the aid of any computer. This attention to detail is an example of how Ford lived his life. By being keen on the finer details, Ford was able to multiply that onto a larger scale. It was one of the building blocks that allowed him to establish a large business empire through the concept of mass production.

Love and Empathy for Fellow Humans

By far one of the most important characteristics any great leader can have. Great leaders love others, care about their well-being, and sincerely have the desire to bring about change. These characteristics were present in all inspiring leaders from Martin Luther King to Karl Marx. Extraordinary people don't mind the difficulties that they endure while they work for the improvement of the greater good. They believe so strongly in their cause that the world follows them without any question.

Persistent Hard Work

By taking a look through history as well as observing the present, one common trait shared by successful people is persistent hard work. Not only do successful people work hard, but they find ways to work smarter in order to maximize their work efficiency. They have the understanding that success does not necessarily happen overnight. Often times, people quit just short of the finish line. Successful people understand this concept and continue to push and persist, even when things are difficult.

Courage

An un-daunting courage to stand up, take charge, and go full on with their mission is a trait of extraordinary people. Whether it was Columbus who set out to find the new world or Nelson Mandela who served 27 years in prison, each of these individuals had the courage and grit needed to fulfill their mission, regardless of how bad the situation or how long it took. In the presence of fear, they still stood firm in their unwavering belief and pushed forward to achieve great heights in their lives.

Success leaves footprints. In order to become extraordinary, often times, it is necessary to observe those who have paved the way before us. Where do you currently stand in your own life? How many of these traits are you currently living into? Make it a goal to grow in each of these traits and you will soon be on your way to living an extraordinary life.

To continue receiving access to powerful tips on becoming an entrepreneur and growing your business, you are invited to visit my Blog Page at http://www.EntrepreneurSuccessPrinciples.com/

Feel free to connect with us and leave a comment on our most recent blog post.

From Edmund Lee and EntrepreneurSuccessPrinciples.com

Published At: Achievement - What Are Some Traits of Extraordinary People?

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Do I Have a Healthy Relationship With My Husband? 5 Ways to Tell

2012-01-03T04:26:00.000-08:00

A marriage is something that is meant to last a lifetime. At least, that is the ideal. And, many couples do make it through their lives while staying married together until truly death does them part.

Still, the ability to stay together and stick out the tough times does not necessarily mean that the marriage is a happy or healthy one. People who are married to each other are not meant to just kill time as a married couple. Their life together needs to have frequent moments of joy and an underlying sense of contentedness.

As the years go by in a marriage, it can be easy to lose sight of whether you are truly happy together. It is hard to know what is normal and healthy and what needs to be fixed.

For example, everyone has a thing or two about their marriage that they wish were different. The trouble is, it is sometimes hard to know whether we should just put up with those things about our marriage we do not love, or whether we should actively be trying to make them better. In order to differentiate these things, sometimes it can help to get a little bit of perspective on the situation.

If you are wondering, "Do I have a healthy relationship with my husband?", here are 5 ways to tell:

1. You willingly and often choose to spend time together

Most people are so busy these days that it can seem like that they sometimes go days between having real quality time to themselves. And, it can be equally hard sometimes to find time for one's spouse.

However, no matter whether you are super busy or whether your life is fairly quiet and clutter-free at this point in time, one sign of a healthy relationship is that you both go out of your way to make time to be together as often as you can.

2. You each show evidence of thoughtfulness toward each other

Most relationships are somewhat one-sided, whereby either the husband or the wife is a "giver" and their spouse is a "taker." Still, regardless of what role you and your husband each play, there should be times when you both show each other a measure of thoughtfulness and kindness. This goes beyond just doing what is expected, but rather it has to do with going out of your way to be kind to your spouse.

3. Both of you plan for your long-term future together

You and your husband probably have different roles in your relationship and in your household. For example, maybe one person handles bringing in income for the family while the other manages household expenses. But regardless of your specific roles, a good sign that your relationship is doing well is if you both often speak and think in terms of your long-term future together. Doing so indicates that you are planning to be together for a long time.

4. You laugh at each other's jokes

Laughter and humor is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship. If you can laugh at each other's jokes and truly find each other funny, mark one for yourselves in the "healthy" column.

5. You have a healthy sex life

For most people, having a regular sexual relationship is a sign of a healthy marriage. You do not need to be doing it twice a day to qualify, either. As long as both of you enjoy sex and have it frequently enough to more or less satisfy both of you, consider your sex life to be a healthy one.

Consider these 5 ways to tell whether you have a healthy relationship. If you have concluded that your relationship needs a bit of work (or a lot of work), don't worry. Just get yourselves on the path to learning how to make your relationship a healthy one again.

About Marie-Claire Smith: Get your relationship back on track with expert relationship advice from someone who has saved thousands of marriages at: Need A Relationship Tune-Up.

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Tips for Achieving Your Peak Performance

2011-12-30T07:08:00.000-08:00

Achieving peak performance is vital in all aspects of our lives, both personal and professional. Included in this article are some tips that have helped me in my own personal life to increase my productivity and success. Take a look at each one of these tips and be open to the benefits of each item. After going through each tip and incorporating it within your life, if you don't feel like it provides value, disregard it. If it does provide value to your life, keep it.

Meditation

Daily meditation and quiet time is one of the most crucial, yet overlooked tips for achieving peak performance. Why might you ask? Throughout our day and throughout our lives, we are constantly bombarded with different messages and stressors. Whether it's family related, work related, incoming phone calls, or email, in this technological age, human beings are becoming more connected and available than ever. The primary drawback with this is that our minds and bodies are in a constant state of stress, as we tackle everything that hits us, from first thing in the morning until late at night.

At what point do we have time to recover and relax? That's where daily meditation and quiet time come into the picture. If there is one thing that you can incorporate into your daily regimen, it would be meditating and having alone time first thing in the morning. By devoting time for meditation in the morning, you start your day off on the right foot with a calm, relaxed attitude, resulting in better decision making as well as increased productivity.

Healthy Diet

Eating healthy will not only help you physically, but it will help you mentally as well. The food that you put into your body acts as fuel, which provides you with the energy needed to sustain you throughout the day. A healthy diet that consists of plenty of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, protein, and water is beneficial for our bodies. Whenever possible, cut out as much processed food as you can. In this day in age, it is becoming increasingly difficult to cut out processed food as most everything around us is processed in one way or another. However, by doing so and making gradual changes, you will begin to reap the benefits. Not only will you be slimmer and more fit, but you'll have more energy as well.

Exercise

To achieve your peak performance physically, it is necessary to begin an exercise regimen. Exercise is beneficial both physically and mentally. Not only does it strengthen your body, but it also releases stress and tension. Make time to exercise at least 3-4 times a week. Whether its weight training, running, cycling, playing sports, or doing yoga, there are a ton of options for you to get out there and be active. If needed, go find a personal trainer that can guide you through the process. Together, you can put together a plan that covers both your nutrition and exercise regimen so that you hit your fitness goals.

Setting Goals

Goal setting is the key element in attaining your success on a day-to-day basis. The problem that many people run into is that they set TOO MANY goals during the course of the day. As a general rule, look at your list of goals that you want to achieve and only select a few of them. By doing so, not only do you keep your mind free, relaxed, and focused, but you also set yourself up for success so that you can build momentum into the next day. Start with a list of only a few goals for the day. If you complete these goals early, feel free to add 1 or 2 more to your list. The key is not to have too many things that you FEEL like you need to complete. Doing so will only increase your stress level, resulting in decreased productivity and lower quality of work.

Accountability Partners

Having one or more accountability partners is one of the most overlooked elements to success. Have accountability partners for different parts of your life. Perhaps you can have an accountability partner for your business that you report into on a daily or weekly basis. You can also have another accountability partner that holds you accountable for your personal life. This may include spending 'x' amount of time each day with your family or friends. It may also include blocking out time for exercise, reading, or quiet time. By having accountability partners, not only are you accountable to yourself, but you are accountable to another person. When you are accountable to another person, you are more likely to take action because somebody else is relying on you to follow through with what you said you would do.

Follow these tips above and the likelihood of success in your life is likely to increase. Ignore them and you will most likely get more of the same of what you are getting right now. Success leaves clues. Is your life leaving behind the type of clues that you want to be remembered for in life?

And to get your Free Instant Access to many more powerful tips on achieving your peak performance, you are invited to visit my Blog Page at : http://www.EntrepreneurSuccessPrinciples.com/

You can also ask me your most important questions there as well...From Edmund Lee and EntrepreneurSuccessPrinciples.com

Published At: Tips for Achieving Your Peak Performance

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Four Fantastic Strategies To Stop Saying I Don't Know What To Do With My Life

2011-12-21T00:36:00.000-08:00

Uncovering what to do with your life could involve using your passions, making a difference in the lives of others and doing work that brings you joy. Contrast this to a life of quiet desperation where you're simply tolerating the routine of everyday living.

If you're ready to figure out what to do with your life, I've listed 4 exercises for you to complete that may help you discover what to do with your life. Schedule an appointment with yourself to do the following exercises.

Strategy #1: Be A Kid Again

The first strategy is to uncover things you previously enjoyed doing and make a list. What did you enjoy most as a child? What did you do for hours looked in your room as a teen? What were your favorite activities? What type of cartoons and TV shows did you enjoy and why? The motive behind this question is it prompts you to think of things you once enjoyed and when you felt the world was your oyster. Continue to ask yourself these questions until you have a list of at least 20 things. Don't censor yourself with the things you write, really brainstorm about what you enjoyed in the past and what you now enjoy. This may hold the key to uncovering your passion.

Strategy #2: What Causes You Pain?

Most people will simply never go any further to do the things they once enjoyed on a daily basis. This is because the majority of the time, we will do more to avoid pain than to gain pleasure. What are things you do the most to avoid pain? However, things that annoy you and have the potential to be painful may be another way to uncover what to do with your life. What changes can you implement up help avoid pain in your life and in the life of others. Sometimes, the very thing that annoys or infuriates us can be just what you've been called to do to make things right again.

Strategy #3: Create a Don't Want List

If you were to walk down any major street and survey people about what they DO want, most would be at a loss. On the other hand, ask them what they DON'T want and they can quickly rattle off a list as long Santa's. Use this strategy to create a list of the all the things you don't want in your life as well as the things you tolerate. Really brainstorm this list and include a minimum of 20 things you no longer want. Once done, go through each item and list the exact opposite. This can bring to light the things you really want and inspire you with what to do with your life.

Strategy #4: Change The World

What is the legacy you want to leave? What do you want others to remember about you? As much as we try to avoid it, this is what I know for sure. Everyone will take their last bow one day on the stage of life. This reality may ignite your thoughts about what to do with your life. Most people dream of changing the world which is to be commended. However, to change the world you have to first change your world.

In closing, you can always refer back to the above 4 strategies so that you finally live the life you are worthy of, and play a big game in life. Don't let limiting beliefs about what's possible stop you from taking action to go on this journey for what to do with your life. When you truly desire to live by design and not by default, you can live each day as if it's Christmas morning.

Are you tired of saying to yourself, I don't know what to do with my life? If you're frustrated with the results or lack of results you've been getting, it's time to stop holding yourself back. Download Michelle Greene's free FunBook, complete with smart goal setting strategies that really work so you can live by design and not by default. http://www.lifeunstuck.com

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Fear the Future? Don't.

2011-12-18T20:13:00.001-08:00

In one sense there are three parts of our lives. Past, present and future. How each of these is viewed has huge consequences.

The past:
If one looks back at the past for anything other than experience, the past can paralyze today. Many times our memories of events, and results from those events will seem relevant to a situation we might be facing today when in reality today's situation is totally different. If we treat the current event like the remembered event, we probably have not addressed it correctly. Each problem, challenge, and situation today requires a fresh new outlook and solution. To be sure, we can use look at past experience for suggestions, but today's solution will always be different.

The future:
The future is not real. One of the biggest blocks to living a full life is to spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about the future. Many people fear an unknown future which makes it impossible to live today. This is especially true for those in business for themselves. When one is beginning a business, with no revenue, no customers and startup costs depleting financial reserves, fear of the future can be overwhelming. In fact, this fear can easily incapacitate one to the point that nothing at all gets done due to the 'what if' scenarios developing from visions of a horrible failure sure to come.

What if - I fail?

What if - no customers show up?

What if - I run out of money?

What if?

The cure for fear of the future is to keep reminding one's Self to live in the present moment as much as possible. To fully focus on what is happening right now is challenging. When bank accounts are shrinking, customers and clients are slow to arrive, and the gut reaction is to extrapolate the current conditions into the future, fear has an opening and will take full advantage!

In the time it takes to think through the process and create this fabricated future, fear steps into a life and plays havoc. The truly sad part is many will create that fabricated future because they already believe it. They will unconsciously make choices to bring that future to reality.

The present:
The present is a daily, minute by minute gift to us from the Universe. The present needs to be appreciated, caressed and cared for.

It is possible to break this vicious cycle of fear based on unreal projections of things that might happen..

Understand the process. Be aware when it is happening to you.
Create the future you want in your mind. (Visualization)
Make a plan to achieve your future. What would you have to do in order to make it reality?
Work your plan.
Measure your progress and adapt your plan.
Have faith in your Self and the Universal laws that will come to your aid.
Stay in the present moment.

Being present is a learning process. Simply being is the first step in that process. To Be who you are comfortable being, and to Do what you love to do provides a very good foundation for the strength required to eliminate the fear of the future and to have faith in the present.

Your Coach and online friend,

Miami Helping others find their path - and stay on it. http://miamiphillips.com

Quotation of the Week·

Learn from the past, plan for the future, and live in the present.

Duane Alan Hahn

About The Author: Miami Phillips is an ANSIR Certified Personal Coach and the founder of Creative MasterMinds who believes personal growth is an essential ingredient to being happy and contributing to this world. While his main focus is affordable personal and business coaching, he also offers motivational teleclasses, ebooks, reading recommendations and much more. To find out more visit his site at http://miamiphillips.com

Photo: Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Be Happier Now - 3 Things to Avoid & 3 Easy Things to Do to Become Happier Now

2011-12-16T08:20:00.001-08:00

Even if you are not one of the lucky ones who feels genetically predisposed to happiness, you can change how you feel by changing how you think and changing some of the actions you take. With only a little practice, it is possible to choose happiness. Here are six simple and easy things that you can do to start becoming a happier person right now.

3 Things to Avoid

1. Listening to/Watching/Reading the news first thing in the morning and right before bed.

First thing in the morning and right before bed your brain is in a relaxed state and you are highly receptive to suggestion. Listening to or watching the news first thing in the morning can set you up in a negative frame of mind for the whole day. Similarly, just before bed, when you've already been winding down, your brain is relaxed and getting ready for dream time to process your experiences and everything that is on your mind.

Ending your day with the powerful negative stimuli provided by the nightly news, especially if you watch it on television which stimulates both visual and auditory cognitive centres, downloads a lot of stress inducing information to your relaxed brain which soaks it up like a sponge. Avoid the news, and any violent television programs before bed. You will rest easier and have sweeter dreams if you stop inputting negative thoughts and images right before bedtime.

2. Playing "I can beat your horror story"

Although this is often a favourite activity at work and at social gatherings, unless you make them really funny stop telling your "horror stories" about work, relationships/ marriage/ divorce, pregnancy/birth, airports, renovations,... anything.

Telling and retelling negative stories keeps them active in your mind and imagination. The human need to reciprocate will have all of your friends and colleagues dragging out their own similar tales, and before you know it they'll all be re-activating their negative experiences and everyone's mood will take a dive.

The more often your subconscious hears, remembers, thinks about the same story, the more deeply it is imprinted and the truer it becomes through sheer force of repetition. If you want to be happy, stop replaying your life's minor and major mishaps, annoyances and tragedies out loud, and talk about happier things.

3. Hanging Out with Negative People

Do your best to avoid constant complainers. To be happy, it is very important to have friends and supporters, but you need people who are upbeat and not those who are into incessant griping, moaning and nagging. These people can suck the energy and sunshine out of your psyche just by entering a room.

If you can't avoid this type of person (maybe they are your spouse, or your mother, or your best friend) be kind and let them know you still care. Let them know that as part of your new approach to a happier life, you will help them find positive solutions for their problems. If they still just want to complain, do your best to change the subject. If this doesn't work, try meridian tapping or EFT to keep your own equilibrium until you can change the subject.

3 Easy Things to Do to Become a Happier Person Now

1. Smile

Did you know that the simple physical act of smiling releases endorphins and dopamine (pleasure chemicals) into your brain? So, even if you are not feeling happy to start with, the very act of smiling makes you feel good. It may feel like you're putting the cart before the horse, but it really works, so give it a try.

2. Laugh Out Loud

Like smiling, the physical act of laughing causes your body to release feel good chemicals into your brain. The skin and muscles in your face are tied directly to your hypothalamus, the mood regulating organ of the brain. Laughing triggers the release of happy hormones, so make it a point to find things to laugh about whenever possible to feel good and lift your mood.

Laughing is so good for you, in fact, that there are now classes in something called "Laughter Yoga." Active laughing can give your core a great workout. Add this to sending pleasure chemicals to your brain, and having fun just because you're laughing, and you have lots of reasons to go ahead and LOL as often as you can!

3. Go Outside & Breathe

And get a little sun if you can. Seeing green and living things is an automatic mood lifter, and so is getting a hit of Vitamin D from the sun. Breathing fresh air and seeing the sky just feels good. The full spectrum of natural light is a pleasure to eyes strained by the strobe effect of fluorescent lights. Even going outside in rain or winter weather can give you a boost by giving you a reason to breathe in the sweet ozone-rich air of rainy weather, or the dry crisp freshness of winter's chill.

©Jacqueline R. Isaac, 2011

For more fun and easy ways to become happier, I invite you to claim your free access to my special report 10 Quick & Easy Mood Lifters. You'll get this free 9 page report as a bonus when you subscribe to my e-zine to keep getting useful articles, tips, book reviews and more at http://www.bestlifecoaching.ca/newsletter-signup.html

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10 Ways to Improve Your Self Image

2011-12-15T08:58:00.000-08:00

How we view ourselves has a great impact on how we move through this world, how others view us, and the decisions we make in our lives. Having a positive self image is one of the most valuable gifts we can give ourselves and those around us. Our self image or self esteem as it could be called, is our source of power and here are 10 ways that will aid in improving your self image.

Positive Thinking - Filling the mind with positive thinking will reflect in your life. By thinking positive we create positive. When our thoughts are focused on the good, that which is right, the creative, the passion that we feel, we can easily make those thoughts our reality.

Positive Self Talk - For many of us there is a dialogue running through our minds most of the time and for most of us we can be our own worst enemies. Changing our inner dialogues to positive self talk can quickly and easily improve our self image. Telling ourselves that we are beautiful, creative, talented, intelligent, and worthy will aid in the process of becoming those wonderful positive aspects that reside within each of us.

Positive Speech - What comes out of our mouths is a direct reflection of what is going on in our minds and it is how people get to know us and see us. By speaking positively and sharing that with others you are not only sharing your positive self image with others you are also helping others to focus on the positive within them as well.

Do What You Love - Create the job, hobby, and life of your dreams. By doing what you love you express who you are. When you do what you love, you love and respect yourself more.

Make Healthy Lifestyle Choices - By making healthy choices in food and exercise, you feel good about yourself and you have the nourishment to be the best you that you can be.

Surround Yourself with Positive People - Positive people will help you increase your positive thinking, your positive speech, your positive self talk and your positive self image. You can use these individuals as a mirror of who you are, who you want to be, and who you are becoming.

Seek Out Positive Situations - Finding the best possible situations that will lead you to your ultimate goals will allow you to continue increasing your self image. When you are on the right path for you, you know it and you feel good about yourself.

Embrace Creativity - Create something; a project, a drawing, a garden, an article, anything you can image or dream up. Self expression through creativity allows you to release and express a part of your deeper self, increasing self awareness and in turn increasing self-image.

Focus On That Which Makes You Uniquely You - Whether it be wearing a flower in your hair, reading books for hours on end, dancing to your favorite song as you make dinner, do it! Have fun with it and enjoy every moment of it!

Stand Behind Yourself 100% - Be who you are without apologies. If you make a decision that you firmly believe is right and good and makes you feel good about who you are, stick with it, own it, it is yours, part of what makes you the special person that you are.

About Amanda Duncan: Amanda Duncan believes that a great way to achieve weight loss results and to improve health in general is to start The Day Off Diet

Published At: 10 Ways to Improve Your Self Image

Photo: graur razvan ionut / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Happiness - 3 Ways To Achieve It

2011-12-14T04:28:00.001-08:00

Having a happy life is a goal most people have, but lets face it, many will never achieve it. Why is this? Personally, I think there comes a time to stop analyzing the reasons why we are not happy because it usually makes us feel miserable. Instead if we all focused on how to be happy and spent our time working towards that happiness we would all be happier people!

This article contains 3 ways anyone can start to achieve happiness. None of these steps cost a penny.

1. Have A Purpose In Life

Know your goals and how to achieve them. People are happier when they have sense of direction. Learn about what are your goals. Think of the ways to reach what you are aiming for. You can achieve happiness if you will find that one ultimate dream that you wish to have. Go to the place where you wanted to be. Write down that purpose that you have to make it more real. Plan the steps ahead to get there. Have pictures you can find in order to see yourself acquiring those things. Don't underestimate the power of visualization. By merely looking at that written plan, you will feel more alive and happier. You will have a focus and something to work towards. Life is not a destination it is a journey. Lets make our journey a joyful and fulfilling one.

2. Eat Well, Sleep Well and Get Active

Your health is your wealth. It is difficult to be happy if you don't feel and look well. Be on a healthy diet. Starving yourself or overeating will never make you happy in the long run. Treat yourself with a chocolate bar. It will boost up your endorphins which is the happy hormones that will give you the feeling of being in love. Get enough sleep to feel well rested. It will give you more energy and you can do more things that way. Your mind and body will be more alert with a good nights sleep. You will feel more positive, more able to change your life. Be active and try out some simple exercise. It will also help not to feel sleepy or lazy all the time. If you feel inactive and lazy you will not be able to feel good about yourself. The healthier you are, the happier you feel.

3. Surround Yourself with Positive People and Have a Positive Outlook in Life

It is true that people are easily influenced and affected by their surroundings. If you have happy people around you, you tend to be happy as well. Surrounding yourself with negative thinking people will ultimately turn you into a negative thinking person. Always try to look at the brighter side of everything. A positive outlook in life will create the happiness that you are looking for.

So try to smile or laugh as much as you can. It's free. Happiness is something we feel on the inside. It allows us reach our potential and life the life we want to live. When we are happy we are confident, positive and comfortable with who we are. Material wealth, physical beauty and material objects will never make us happy. They will make life easier but not happier! If you like who you are you are a long way along the road to life lasting happiness.

Remember if you are unhappy with your life or feel depressed, seek help. With the right help people can and do make recoveries from depression and go on to lead their best lives imaginable.

Are you unhappy with your life? Seek help.

Do you want to learn more about depression and anxiety?

Click here to receive your FREE e-book on everything you need to know about depression and anxiety and much more... http://lifelastinghappiness.com

Rose White Young's recovery from years of depression, against all the odds, has inspired her to setup a blog to help people manage and overcome their depression.

Click here for advice and resources http://depressionadviceblog.com

Start today. Be all that you are capable of being.

Photo: graur codrin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Self Empowerment Plan for You

2011-12-13T08:24:00.001-08:00

How can self empowerment give you more fulfillment in your life? By knowing yourself, respecting yourself, and trusting yourself you do away with any need to doubt or ridicule yourself, or fear life.

Have you ever wondered why one person seems to thrive no matter what life throws at them while others shrivel even in the best weather? A good deal of this has to do with whether or not they are an empowered human being. Knowing and loving yourself is one of the key ingredients to positive growth, and this is a big part of the difference in the two examples above. One has the nurturing they need to thrive in all types of conditions and the other heaps self-recriminations and worse upon themselves daily.

Self Knowledge

Discovering your own individual seeds of happiness and success are the perfect first step for your empowerment plan. What is it that drives you? Explore what values you hold closest to your heart; what are you passionate about in life; what do you believe is your life purpose; and how do you prioritize these things in your life?

Adjust the Soil Conditions

If the seeds of success are not growing in your life, could there be a problem with the soil? Positive self-talk, self-esteem and self-motivation are the best ground conditions for the seeds of success. They will water, fertilize and support these seeds to full maturity and harvest in your life. Look very carefully at how you think and feel about 'you'. Are you constantly berating the way you look, act or feel? Not very much positive can grow from these soil conditions.

Believe

Have you heard the saying, "if you can believe it, you can achieve it"? So guess what, you have to believe in the possibility of your own self empowerment. You must come to the knowledge that you are worthy and capable of discerning the best path for yourself through life. Many people have a long history of believing the 'put downs' they have been handed through the years... being told they are incapable or not good enough. Couple that with all the 'professionals' that society endorses to run our lives (doctors, lawyers, religious leaders, politicians), and it's easy to feel disempowered. Of course experts are good, but you have to believe in your own capabilities to question and make decisions for your self. You are worthy of believing in!

Empower Yourself

Can you empower yourself? Of course, you can! It's a matter of you wanting it badly enough. If you make it a priority, you will find the tools that will best help you to embrace strong self belief and empowerment. For some, those tools look like everyday life unfolding its secrets for your success. For others it's self help books, or personal development seminars. And others may find life coaching is the perfect path for them. It can be done, and you have the strength it will take to do so!

Cathy Johnson Campbell shares more tips on developing a self-empowerment plan and more personal development tools on her site at Inspired-Personal-Development.com

Published At: Self Empowerment Plan for You

Photo: photouten / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Be SMART: Set and Achieve Your Goals!

2011-12-12T20:06:00.001-08:00

Effective goal management is one of the keys to achieving everything you want and need. It is a lifelong process that is not limited to a few New Year's resolutions. You will need to train yourself, and it takes effort. While effective goal management is a worthy objective, it will take time and personal commitment to implement an effective plan.
Most of us think we already have goals, but the truth is that most of us don't. Unless we have our goals properly quantified, planned and written down, we don't really have goals at all. We may have dreams or wishes, but we don't have goals.

A little acronym that can be very useful in quantifying your goals is SMART! Here is a brief overview of the process:

S - Make your goals specific, know exactly what you want to achieve.
M - Goals should be measurable. You need to know where you are and how you are progressing.
A - Make them achievable, this doesn't mean easy but with the right amount of challenge.
R - Goals should be realistic. They should not be based on circumstances or good luck.
T - You should establish a timeline for your goals.

Here are some goal setting tricks:

The simple mechanical act of writing your goals down makes your goals visible and tangible. It's no longer just a thought. Make sure your goal is as specific as possible, and then it becomes a commitment.
Ask yourself, why do you want to achieve your goal? I want it doesn't count. There are reasons behind your goals, and if you realize why you want to reach your goal, it will keep you focused and motivated to follow your plan till the end.
How do you get started when you already have so much to do? Every day write down a small task for the next day. Make it as small as you can, maybe something that would only take 10-15 minutes. The most difficult thing is to get started. And once you get started you will actually find out that you won't mind doing more than you planned. Set big goals, but make your tasks small.
Write down the achievements and tasks you've completed daily. Only write down what you've done and list even small things; make it a daily habit. Writing down your progress motivates you, helps eliminate temptation and simplifies your life.
The perfect time to start is NOW! Don't waste your life waiting for the perfect conditions or perfect opportunity. They don't exist. Use what you have, start right now, never ever procrastinate!
Are you the person who always puts things off and promises to do it later? Next time you catch yourself putting off an important task, write down the answer to 3 simple questions. Where are you? What do you want to do? How will you feel while doing it? While writing these things down you will already imagine yourself doing it, and it won't be very difficult to get up and do it.
Make a game out of it! Challenge yourself! You can turn any boring task into a fun game. Just use a little imagination. See how quickly you can finish a task and keep trying to improve your time. The good thing is you will always be a winner.

TJ Carter, SPHR, is Vice President of Human Resources at Staff One, Inc. Prior to joining Staff One, TJ founded TJ Carter and Associates, LLC, a national Human Resources consulting firm. TJ has over 25 years of Human Resources Management experience in the public utility, insurance, real estate, telecommunications, financial services and fitness industries. Prior to founding TJ Carter and Associates, TJ served as the Vice President of Human Resources for Gold's Gym International and ACE Cash Express, Inc.

TJ is a member of the national Society for Human Resources Management and the Dallas Human Resources Management Association, and is certified as a Senior Professional in Human Resources. TJ graduated from the University of Central Oklahoma with a BA in Criminal Justice. She holds an MS in Human Resources Management from Golden Gate University and was a former military officer with the United States Air Force.

Published At: Be SMART: Set and Achieve Your Goals!

Photo: digitalart / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

3 Keys to How You Can Be Happy and Successful

2011-12-11T09:23:00.001-08:00

Happiness is a lifelong pursuit. It's something we all strive for and yet to achieve full and lasting happiness seems elusive even for the most successful people among us.

Some people have even suggested that to become successful you need to first be unhappy, after all if you were happy where you were why would you try to get more? There is some truth to that, but I take a different view.

I say that if you can be happy in the pursuit of success then you can have both happiness and success.

How can this be accomplished? How can you be both happy and successful? Here are 3 key things you must do:

1. Try to find success in something you love

In order to be happy in the pursuit of success then its vitally important that whatever it is you try to be successful at be something you love to do. The reason is that if you love to do it you'll be able to work longer and harder at it, and you'll be happy while your doing it. Gaining success from it is just a bonus. Some people have called this follow your bliss or follow your heart.

2. Celebrate each step

Take time to celebrate all of the little victories. Just made your first dollar? Celebrate. Just got your 100th client? Celebrate. Celebrating mini-milestones is key to being both happy and successful. This is because of course celebrating is fun in and of itself and because it is an important psychological tool which lets your subconscious know you're making it. Its also important because it shows you progress is being made towards your goals. It lets you reflect on where you've came from and where you are now.

3. Laugh at and embrace failure

Everyone who has ever succeeded at anything has failed countless times before their success finally came. Once you accept and embrace that fact then failure becomes something entirely different. Failure is simply Gods way of telling you that your on the wrong track. So when you fail laugh at Gods humor and make sure to learn the lesson that the universe is trying to teach you. Then move on, adapt and overcome. You will fail again, but you will learn something again. Eventually, if everything works out then your eventual reward will be the achievement of your goal.

I know you can do it... now get started!

Brian is the creator of the site. Check out his site and especially his research on happiness and success.

http://thegoodlife.org/how-to-be-happy
http://thegoodlife.org/how-to-be-a-success

Photo: Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Self Development: A Way to Success

2011-12-10T04:45:00.000-08:00

No matter what status we hold in society, either a student, an executive, an employee or a teacher, we are entitled for improvement, not only for the betterment of our lives, but also for self-fulfillment and self gratification.

Not a single person in this world is perfect and exempted from committing mistakes and flaws in life, but we have the power and capacity to change them for the betterment of our lives and welfare of the people around us.

Some people failed to succeed in life because they refused to accept their flaws, failed to recognize their lack of qualities and skills and hesitate to accept the reality that we are in a competitive world, bound to compete with others to survive.

In order to succeed and perform better in whatever field of endeavor to choose to pursue, we should not only be contented with what skills we have, but we must take measures to develop our personalities. Developing your personality plays a vital role in your success, affecting how you tackle and how you eliminate the obstacles that you encounter.

Before you take action to develop yourself, you must do an inventory of your total personality and assess which areas need improvement and what skills you lack.

Areas of personality which are vital to one’s success:

* Communication skills – it is important in one’s personality development because through it you can express your thoughts, ideas and opinions. Communication skills that need improvement include effective persuasive writing skills and telephone communication skills.

* Confidence – if you have confidence, you care confident that you can do what ever you aim for in life. Inferiority complex and inadequacy hinder personal growth, while boost of self-confidence is needed to achieve success and happiness.

* Optimism – you should have positive outlook always because negative attitude hampers success and self development. As quoted from the video “Law of Attraction,” positive thinking and mind set beget positive energy. It fuels progress and self development.

* Stress and depression management – stress is one barrier that hinders success, while depression disrupts the flow of progress and personal growth.

* Coping skills – you should have skills to cope up obstacles and problems experienced. With your coping skills, you can advance and further your quest for personal growth.

* Self esteem – It is a vital factor in personal growth. Those who have self-esteem learn to have balanced habits and behaviors. With it, you can have clear purpose in life and strength in bouncing back after experiencing failure.

* Persistence – you must have persistence in life, without it, you easily withdraw and acceded to failure. With persistence, you always bounce back after failure and learn from the mistakes committed.

* Creativity – with resourcefulness, you an always find an alternative way to solve problems. With creativity, you can find new and alternative options to become successful in whatever undertaking you pursue in life.

* Curiosity – majority of successful individuals are inquisitive and always asked questions. Their curious and inquisitive behavior allows them to have deeper understanding of the challenges and obstacles they encounter.

* Emotional intelligence – this skill allows you to act and react to emotions correctly and handle problems with coolness. The higher the emotional intelligence you have, the greater chance that people listens to your ideas and follow your actions.

With these character traits, you can accomplish things and achieve success in life. Some successful individuals use a combination of these skills to pursue their goals.

About Christina Cordle: Christina Cordle enjoys writing for Coachestrainingblog which is an online resource on life coach programs and life coach salary range as well as other related subjects.

Published At: Self Development: A Way to Success

Photo: graur codrin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Low Self Esteem Signs - 10 Unhealthy Behaviors

2011-12-09T03:00:00.000-08:00

Self esteem can mean many things to many people. As a whole, it can be defined as how worthy we feel to ourselves and to the world. If an individual feels a low level of worth, their attitudes about themselves and the world will be negative, bitter, and disapproving. While in contrast, one who feels a high level of worth has a more healthy view of themselves, develops positive relationships, and finds comfort in the world and their surroundings.

It is not uncommon for us to feel badly about ourselves from time to time. The occasional dip in our spirits is not the same as having low self esteem. This list of ten low self esteem signs can help provide clarity:

1. You do not feel secure in who you are or what you have to offer the world. You are not sure where your place is, and do not feel like you have a purpose or even direction.

2. You are not able to see the good in others or the world around you. You are critical of others and very judgmental.

3. You are not able to move on from the past and stay stuck, and continue to relive a bad experience.

4. You are not able to overcome adversity or setbacks easily. Small things bring your down and keep you there.

5. You are not able to forgive yourself or others. You believe that everyone is against you.

6. You do not have a clear sense of your own values. You do not know what is important to you or what defines your character.

7. You take poor care of your physical and mental health. You body and mind are not a priority to you and you pay little attention to your overall health.

8. You are not able to develop a positive outlook on life, and feel that no good can come your way.

9. You are pessimistic and unhappy, and not able to give to others.

10. You do not take responsibility for your own thoughts, actions, or life. You feel like everyone else but you has caused your problems.

Having low self esteem and not loving yourself go hand in hand. There are many reasons for this and many influences throughout our lives that contribute to low self esteem - from our parents, to teachers, to religious leaders, to the social climate during time we were growing up, siblings, and peers. Poor self esteem is not something that happens overnight, and it can definitely be changed.

Learning to love yourself is one of the first steps in beginning to feel better about yourself and your position in life. Nurturing and comforting yourself emotionally, taking care of yourself physically, being financially responsible, having intellectual stimulation, and creating an environment that is comfortable and reflects your personality are all expressions of self love.

Acquiring a good self esteem is about setting attainable goals, hard work, and acheivement. This sense of accomplishment is an act of loving yourself and changing your position in life to make yourself great.

About Julianna Gauthier: Julianna Gauthier is passionate about helping others feel great about themselves. Learn more about low self esteem signs by visiting: www.RescueYourSelfEsteem.com, a popular website shd created that provides tips, advice, and resources on improving self esteem.

Photo: David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Your Path to Self-Growth

2011-12-08T03:17:00.001-08:00

Independence is a wonderful thing. It signifies your ability to stand on your own feet and think for yourself -- the hallmark of self-growth and all things that make you whole as a person. Sometimes it can be a bit scary venturing out on your own without someone to do all the decision-making for us. But rather than be intimidated, embrace the challenge. See it as a milestone in your life.

Here are things you can do as you make that journey to find yourself and establish your own identity:

• Observe people around you and note their habits and treatment of others. Separate the admirable traits from the negative ones. Use the former as your peg to turn yourself into a better person, and use the latter as a reminder of the things that go against your better judgment.

• Start making decisions for yourself. Weigh the pros and cons of each situation, but do not ask anyone what they think you should do. Part of self-growth includes learning to trust your own instincts.

• Learn to accept your frailties and imperfections. That way, when you make mistakes, you won't be so hard on yourself. A mature and independent individual will be more accepting of himself and not allow any mess-ups to derail him from pursuing his goals and becoming the best he can be.

• Try to do things on your own before asking for help from others. If you've been so used to receiving assistance at the onset, now is the time to break free from that and go "solo." That is, until you can honestly assess that it's time to get some help.

• Self-growth is also about discovery. If you've never been away from home or have always done things with family and friends, then go on a short trip. Don't let anyone tag along. Think of this as "me time" - a time for personal reflection, relaxation and enjoyment. Quiet moments have a way of stimulating our minds and helping us discover things about ourselves, things we are unable to do when surrounded by the cacophony of our environment. We also learn to fend for ourselves, thus honing our survival instincts.

• Learn to start saying no. You don't have to accept all social invitations. You don't have to agree to everything that is said. Say yes only to people, occasions and ideas that really matter. Don't be afraid to go against the grain.

• Keep experimenting, trying, discovering and surprising yourself. Enjoy your journey to self-growth and remember that you alone can transform yourself into the person you wish to become. Good luck!

Read more information on self-growth and learn how you can improve the quality of your life and take charge of your own destiny. Use these guides to help map your own road to success and transform yourself into a more confident and independent individual.

Photo: graur codrin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net