Blog for Self Improvement & Personality Development

How to Set Positive Affirmations to Help You Achieve Your Goals

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 09:44:00 +0000

Positive affirmations are a tried and tested method to help you stay positive and achieve your goals. If you continue to tell yourself you can do something, then slowly you will begin to believe it and will start to achieve it. In this article we provide you with five tips to help set your positive affirmations.

Step 1: Think of all of your good qualities.

Step 2: Think of your negative thoughts.

Step 3: Work out which are the most important negative thoughts you want to change.

Step 4: Write your positive affirmations:

Step 5: Refer to your positive affirmations, and your good qualities daily.

Don't expect things to work from day one. It can take a while to overcome all the negative thoughts and to start believing the positive ones. The key is to repeat the positive affirmations every day until they become part of your thinking. Once you believe in yourself and believe you will be successful, you will easily be able to achieve your goals.

If you want to learn more about goal setting and time management, then check out Rusty O'Connors The Goal Setting Ezine at http://www.thegoalsettingezine.com It is completely free and you will even get a free e-book just for checking it out.

Time Management - 5 Mistakes to Avoid

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 03:33:00 +0000

Every day has the same number of hours, every week has the same number of days, and every month has the same number of weeks. Why then are some people so much more productive than others? The answer is time management. Time management is a system of structuring your day so that you have a plan for all of the work that needs to be completed.

Some people just can't do it right, and they're usually making one of the 5 major mistakes of time management.

Mistake #1 - Setting Unrealistic Goals

A lot of people set their time management goals by creating a long list of items that need to be taken care of, a 'to-do- list of sorts. This works in many situations, but you have to be careful not to make it unrealistic. Setting too many goals or unrealistic goals can impede the progress of the other items on the list.

When you set up a schedule, take a step back and think about whether you're not setting your goals a little too high.

Mistake #2 - Being Unprepared

The next time management mistake that people sadly fall victim to is trying to accomplish goals without the proper preparation. If you have an important business presentation, you should be spending the hours beforehand preparing and rehearsing the steps to turn it into a success. Failing to do this will just end up wasting time and putting you farther behind on your other meetings.

Additionally, it might annoy some people. Bosses look at good preparation as a strong character trait in employees they are going to promote.

Mistake #3 - Allowing for Interruptions

You have a goal in mind, you're focused on it, you're about to make it happen, and then...somebody walks into your office to ask you how to change the filter in the coffee machine. It's frustrating, and it breaks your concentration, making it harder to get back into the task later. Making yourself accessible is one thing, but being too accessible can be a serious setback to your time management goals.

To fix this, turn your phone off, close your Skype or email chat windows, and shut your door, leaving you time to work through a task efficiently and without interruption

Mistake #4 - Forgetting When to Say No

Some people are very helpful, and everyone seems to want to help with their own problems. If you're the kind of person who can easily put down what you're doing to help another person sort through their confusions, you may need to put a stop to it. Believe it or not, there is such a thing as being too helpful, especially if it leads to you wasting time and putting off your own time management goals.

It's okay to tell someone that you just don't have the time to help them out right now. They'll understand. It's also a better option than saying yes and not fully delivering on your promises.

Mistake #5 - Trying to Make Everyone Happy

This is the most important time management mistake that people make. As my father put it, "If you want to fail, try to please everyone all the time." It's okay to help others out, but remember what the priority is - you. It might sound selfish, but it's how you need to operate for successful time management.

It's easy to learn how to manage your time. Just avoid these 5 huge mistakes of time management and you will be off to a good start.

About The Author: Ann Moynihan specializes in all aspects of Personal Development and Self Improvement Techniques. For more information visit www.annmoynihan.com

Published At: Time Management - 5 Mistakes to Avoid

Photo: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The 7 Most Important Personal Development Skills

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 17:49:00 +0000

Personal development skills are about conscious change of self. Change happens to all of us and most of it happens unconsciously. However if you are a bit like me you would like to be in charge of your own life and how it develops, would you not?

Personal development skills need to be performed with mindfulness and presence in order to make this happen. At least that is what my experience is after having struggled during most my adult life. It was not until I did specific things in a certain way that I succeeded in making real change happen.

1: Resolution

After working with myself for more than 30 years having solved my most critical problems is a reasonable expectation. Well, as disappointing as it was I had not.

It was first when my frustration reached its critical mass so to speak, that I managed to make a decision so strong it pervaded me into the core of my essence. This constituted a major shift in my awareness and signified that the old way of how I saw myself finally had reached a point of chaos that was ready to reorganize at a higher level.

My point is this: You need to be ready for the change in order to make it happen. You need a core decision, a resolution to go through with your intention. If making a solid resolution to follow through with your conscious change process is not among your repertoire of personal development skills, you will back off long before any success will be at sight.

2: Taking responsibility

Real change did not start for me until I took full responsibility of my own thinking and behavioral patterns and realized that it was my way of viewing reality that did not serve me the way I wanted. It was my way of viewing life that created my problems rather than the other way around. Placing the responsibility upon my parents and other people and situations had prevented me from creating the progress I had sought for my whole adult life. Among all the personal development skills this is crucial.

3: Growing awareness

I started to observe my thoughts, feelings and behavior in situations I perceived as difficult. I noticed when I felt discomfort, unrest, confused and other symptoms of not handling things as well as I would like to. I discovered something interesting: Being my worst enemy became more and more impossible as my awareness of how I practiced my mind power increased.

Today I have realized that it is not possible to continue doing something that goes against my intentions when I'm totally aware. Have in mind that the opposite is also true: You are only able to act in harmful ways when you lack awareness of something.

4: Identification

I also discovered that the acceptance of what I noticed was vitally important for making any progress at all. The progress started first when I managed to get myself out of denial of the actual fact.

As I developed I noticed the progress increased with my ability to notice my feelings, listen carefully to my thoughts and identify more properly with what was actually happening inside me.

I realized that explaining unwanted results with what other people did, only disconnected me from the real reason and the ownership of my results and as such my possibility to change anything at all. Being able to identify fully with what is happening both inside of you and in your outer life need to be among your personal development skills.

5: Self-talk

I created a new way of talking to myself. Instead of saying "I am depressed" I said "Now I have had one or more thoughts depressing me". And when I felt some kind of upheaval I shifted from "This is too difficult for me" to "This is part of the change process and I choose to go through with it because I have decided to create a better life for myself."

I also changed my self-talk from defining myself in all kinds of negative ways to ask myself questions. I.e.: "What do I necessarily believe in order to think this way - or experience this?" "What thoughts can possibly have produced these feelings - or these experiences?"

You need to switch your inner self-talk from criticizing yourself to be your own most loyal partner.

6: Attitude

During my process it became more and more obvious to me that my intention for change needed to come from a positive attitude. As long as my intention was to get away from something, the change that I wanted did not occur. As a matter of fact it was rather the opposite that happened.

I needed to shift my focus to something positive. Positive attitude also influenced my ability to let whatever was happening to me being okay. This was important because it was only then I got the power to do what needed to be done.

Changing from an overall negative thinking pattern to a positive way of thinking can be a real challenge. Early in my process I stumbled upon the most useful tool I have ever used in enhancing my personal development skills; brain entrainment. I recommend it highly as it really helps you act from a relaxed state which is important for the results you get.

7: Focus

When you focus you push aside all kinds of distractions to your conscious intention. When I was able to fill my mind totally with my conscious intention AND align my thoughts, feelings and actions with that intention, AND do this with clarity and strength... Then things really started to progress and change happened fast.

I believe this to be the most magical of all personal development skills as the results you want seems to happen in magical ways when you manage this.

Based upon my own experience with failure and success in my own change process, I believe these seven elements to be the most important personal development skills you could acquire.

Published At: The 7 Most Important Personal Development Skills

Secret to Success: Determination and Will-Power

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 12:16:00 +0000

A lot of people who experience being on top really finds it difficult to describe what success really mean. Different people have different connotation when it comes to expressing the true meaning of success. To some people success means being on top of their careers while to others it may mean family and friends.

While success differs from one perception to another, Steven Spielberg, a famous and well respected filmmaker once said, “Failure is inevitable. Success is elusive.” He means that if each one of us is capable of grasping our success though it takes a lot of risks and sacrifices, each of us is capable of describing our own success.

Truly, success is the most difficult to describe, difficult to grasp and difficult to handle. A view from the top is a lot more different if you are still struggling to reach even the first step of the ladder. That is why, when successful people were asked about the scenario, they may answer that it takes a lot more courage to stay your foot on the ground while you see everything above everyone.

While staying humble can eventually maintain and welcome a lot more success, let us first know how these people become successful.

1. Know what success really means to you. You cannot grasp the most coveted success if you cannot even describe the meaning of success. Every person has his own perception when it comes to success. Defining your success means having goals to follow and to achieve.

2. According to the renowned writer and poet T.S. Elliot, “Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.” It takes a lot of courage and determination to reach the finest destination. Success is not a food or things that could be bought anywhere; success is earned through hard work and confidence. It is not a straight road to pass but a crooked straight line where the gold still lies at the end. Be courageous to sail with your dreams whatever it may take.

3. Mingle with successful people. Positive energy from successful people can infect you. According to some, success is a form of virus. It means a determined person opens all his channels to let all the possibilities of success in. What is best when you are around with these people is that you are more encouraged and inspired to take the road seeing them highly-driven and passionate with their goals.

4. Katinka Hesselink’s, “Don't give up trying to find your way. But do remember that sometimes it takes bending to avoid breaking,” definitely teaches us not to easily give up. As long as there is a possibility, may it be small or very difficult; one who persists and does not give up can eventually taste success. Always remember that the sweetest success comes from the things that pushed you to your limits.

5. Success does not always constitute happiness. According to some, when people are determined to grasp success, they tend to risk a lot of things even their own happiness. Do not misconstrue the two terms because they mean differently from each other. Success may be the fulfillment of your goals but it does not always guarantee satisfaction.

Success is for everyone which means, it does not choose who to be successful as long as one has determination and will power to take all the risks. A golfer may have all golf cart parts, golf cart accessories, and other essential things for the sports but success is no guarantee if one does not know how to play. Learn to accept challenge; for one who sees light behind darkness will always reach the finest success.

About Reba N. Stern: Reba N. Stern enjoys writing for Groovycarts.com which offers golf car accessories and golf cart parts as well as a host of additional products.

Photo: suphakit73 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

7 Steps On How To Save Your Relationship Or Marriage

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 17:58:00 +0000

What went wrong and when did it got wrong? These are just some of the questions you ask yourself when you are trying to save your relationship or marriage. You really care for the person and you don’t want to lose them, but you are not sure what to do to save your relationship from falling apart.

All relationships and marriages go through ups and downs. The true test of how strong a relationship or marriage is depends on how well you handle the ups and downs. We are all humans and we all make mistakes. Sometimes we do things that we know we shouldn’t do and when we get caught, we want forgiveness. I have a saying “you don’t go to jail for stealing, you go to jail for getting caught stealing”. The main two problems that most relationships or marriages face that can cause a breakup are money and cheating.

Lack of money to pay bills or if one person in the relationship is spending too much money will cause major problems within the relationship. When you are broke or you don’t’ have money to do the things you want to do, this adds stress to any relationship. You tend to be on edge around each other and you are constantly trying to find ways to make a dollar out of fifteen cents.

Cheating or infidelity is a major reason why many relationships fail. Once you lose trust in the individual that cheated, it’s hard for them to regain that trust. People cheat for all types of reasons and you will never figure out why that person cheated. You can have to most solid relationship and still have one of the parties cheat. And women cheat just as much as a man and it’s hard to explain why anyone would cheat. I could go on for days and to some of the reason people give for cheating, but what’s the point.

A relationship takes a team effort in order to survive the challenges brought on my life. In order to resolve many of the problems faced by most relationships, you have to ask a few basic questions. Why is the relationship failing in the first place? Why you no longer talk to each other anymore, instead you talk at each other. Somebody in the relationship feels like their needs are not being met and they want a change.

Let’s look at 7 steps you can do the try and save your relationship:

Step 1 – Communication. When two people do not know how to communicate in a healthy manner, obviously it's only a matter of time before things fall apart. Some people deal with communication issues by screaming; other people run away. Neither of these solutions is healthy. Pointing the finger and constantly bringing up the faults of one's partner, or constantly bringing up the past, will cause severe destruction within the relationship.

Step 2 – No Longer Giving. Relationships are all about giving and taking. When you have an imbalance of giving and taking you will have problems. You can’t have one person giving 80% and the other person giving 20%. Or you can have one person that is always receiving and never giving. You have to find ways to compromise with each other. You will never strike a complete balance of both people giving 50%, but you can tip the scale in a more balance way. Some people are just natural givers and they enjoy giving. The problem is that the person receiving can take all that giving as a sign of weakness. Then they just keep on taking and taking and never give anything in return. This is an area that you have to sit down and talk about with each other.

Step 3 – Lack of Support. It is nothing worse than no getting the support you need from your partner. You have to find ways to support and encourage each other. Lack of support leads to people doing things behind their partners back. The tricky part is knowing when to support and idea or suggestion.

Step 4 – Know how to manage conflict. Stuff happens and you got to find ways to deal with conflict when they come up. Screaming and yelling at each other will not solve your conflict. Instead it will only lead to more conflict. It’s better to talk to each other in a rational voice than it is to just scream and shout at each other. I know some people get pretty emotional about certain topics and they tend to get pretty loud to express themselves.

Step 5 – Selfishness. Selfishness is the root of all relationship problems. When we are selfish we think of ourselves first and foremost. We ignore the needs of others and become ego centric. Ego centric people are never easy to live with; they tend to be a drain on relationships. When we are selfish we want the praise, support and backing of others; but, we are not willing to give anything in return.

Step 6 – Blame Game. - Whoever we spend time with will undoubtedly have faults. Successful relationships require a certain tolerance of others’ weaknesses. If we keep picking up on the faults of over people, expecting them to change, we create permanent tension. For example, your partner or friend may not share your judgments that they are faults. This does not mean we have to ignore when others do wrong things

Step 7 – Needs vs. Wants. Another problem that most couples have is understanding the difference between needs and wants. A need is something you must have to sustain life and to live your life. A want is something you just want and is nice to have. You can work on ways to satisfy needs, but wants are up for discussion. I want a new car, I want a new boat, I want a new dress, and I want a new purse. You got to find ways to take care of the needs and set goals for the wants.

About Sean Templeton: In order to help save your marriage, you need to have patience and perseverance to get through the tough times. But never give up on your marriage. Get FREE marriage help and so much more by visiting www.itisallhere.com.

Photo: nuttakit / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Dealing With Loneliness Through Visualization

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 09:31:00 +0000

Whether you like it or not, there will be times when you will feel a sense of loneliness, especially during special occasions such as New year, Christmas, and even your own birthday. Many recover from their loneliness and learn to focus their attention to something else. However, others cannot and just find themselves falling much deeper into their loneliness until it turns into depression.

If you ever find yourself becoming lonelier by the day, it’s time for you to do something. You may want to see a psychologist or counselor to help you deal properly with whatever it is that causes you to be lonely. Nevertheless, you can also help yourself. You can practice visualization technique.

What Is Visualization?

For you to understand visualization more easily, you can just picture yourself daydreaming. The only difference is in daydreaming, you’re not really getting anything except perhaps a sense of motivation or encouragement. In visualization, the goal is to somehow change your thought pattern, such as a negative emotion or feeling to something more positive.

Visualization also involves tapping the subconscious. The unconscious mind is the one part you have no control of. Thus, any kind of subliminal messages you send to your subconscious will remain there forever. You just need to access them whenever they are needed.

What It Demands

Visualization requires concentration at your end. Keep in mind you’re trying to access your subconscious. If you allow yourself to be disturbed by a lot of things, such as your environment and even your own emotion, you will find yourself only accessing your conscious mind.

To help you, you may want to take note of the following tips:

1. Find a good place and time to visualize. If you’re already excellent with this, you can do this anytime you like. However, if you’re starting out, you need to find a good place and time to do it. A suggestion is to do so when you’re not busy or when there are very few to zero distractions. Thus, this may be during early in the morning or before you go to sleep. Between the two, though, the latter is the more ideal since the mind is very much relaxed.

2. Take deep long breaths. Deep and slow breathing can be extremely helpful since the breaths themselves can bring your attention not to the reasons of your loneliness but to the present moment. This will also keep you feel very relaxed and receptive to the subliminal messages you’re trying to send to your subconscious.

3. Create your scenarios. You can be very imaginative with your visualization, but make sure the message is very clear. For example, you may imagine yourself standing in front of a huge board and listing all the things that make you lonely. Then think about holding a huge eraser and slowly getting rid of them.

You can also add more subliminal messages through affirmations. Perhaps the following can do:

I am well loved.
I have the ability to love and be loved in turn.
I choose to be happy.

About Nelson Berry: Nelson Berry is The Pioneer of Subliminal Messages Online. Click Here Now for 4 Free Subliminal Messages Video Downloads (valued at $160)!

Photo: Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

5 Habits That Make You Great!

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 12:09:00 +0000

Actions are the things that make you great. Empty words and no action will not make you great. Words are to be followed by deeds. Things happen only when we think that it can. Actions come from thought and thoughts come from habits and hence habits are the foundation of our success. Wrong habit can lead you to doldrums. On the other hand good habits can make you great.

Habits are unconscious behaviour. There is a method to engrave the habits. It is proven that any activity which is done consistently for 21 days in a row, has a very high probability of getting converted into a habit. So here is the MANTRA. Repeat the activity you want as a habit, 21 days without any break and YOU have a habit.

Thats about the formation of habits. But which are habits that will make us great?

Here are some of the habits which have potential of making you great.

1) Prioritizing the Vital few: We have the habit of running behind all the things. Instead just decide your priorities early in life and concentrate all your efforts on it. It will save lot of your energy.

2) Never postpone a work: We have this tendency to postpone a work as per the urgency. Never do this. Instead, decide on the importance of work and complete it. You get the right ideas when the job is told to you. The intensity is lost when you postpone it.

3) Always have a positive attitude: It is always a fact that people never like to be associated with anything negative. They never like to be seen with a person having negative attitude. So moral of the story is always to have a positive mental attitude.

4) Be ready to help others: Help everyone who asks for it. Believe me, it is the single most important habit that has the potential of highest returns. Never expect any favour in return. You follow this and you are on your way to greatness.

5) It's never too late to start: Most of the time have some mental blocks because of which we never try the things which we alway wanted to. So, it's never late to start. Achieve your dreams. Don't be afraid of failures.

Friends these are some of the habits that can make you great. This list is not an end in itself. This list can always expand. I welcome you all to provide your views on this.

My email id is rbrakesh5@gmail.com

Published At: 5 Habits That Make You Great!

Photo: Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

9 Easy Ways to Improve Your Life

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 14:32:00 +0000

The below list describes 9 easy ways in which you can improve your life in a short space of time, and without spending huge sums of money:-

1) Create a 'bucket list'. Make a list of all the things you've always wanted to do, no matter how bizarre or extravagant (as long as they are legal!). Don't give thought at this point to how you are going to achieve them or pay for them - such thoughts breed negativity. Spend a few hours and really think about all the amazing stuff you want to do over the coming months, years and decades - and feverishly jot them down! Regularly review your list with excitement and anticipation, and make them happen!

2) Spend a week without turning on the television. Most people spend hours in front of the television everyday, but what do they gain other than weight? Break the habit by unplugging, or better still disconnecting, the TV for a whole week (Monday AM to the following Monday AM is ideal). During the TV'less week find new and innovative ways to fill your time. After a week I'm betting your TV intake will reduce for the future and your eyes will be open to many new activities and possibilities.

3) Email someone you admire or respect. Is there anybody you have seen who is living life how you want to? I'm guessing the answer to that is 'Yes' - then why not email or write to them and find out the secret to their success. Why re-invent the wheel when you can benchmark and replicate an existing proven plan?

4) Get up early. Never have time for yourself? - then give it. Get up earlier in the morning and do something you enjoy - whether it be performing exercise, cooking, reading or just planning your day ahead. By waking early and performing a beneficial task you will also give yourself the perfect springboard for a productive and enjoyable day.

5) Compete in Fitness Challenges. Exercise and fitness is great, but to keep it up you need a reason. What better motivation than competing against other people from around the World and encouraging and supporting each other along the way. There are currently online sites such as Konkura who provide such a service free of charge.

6) Complete the 'Seven Day Mental Diet'. Complete Emmet Fox's masterpiece 'The Seven Day Mental Diet' and it will change the way you think forever. Whilst this is not actually an easy task (my title should have been '9 easy 1 hard'!), those who follow it for 7 consecutive days will be amazed by the results.

7) Plan a holiday / trip or event. Having something to look forward to is important to a positive mindset. So many unhappy or depressed people often say 'what have I got to look forward to?'. Don't fall into that trap, always have something lined up that excites, encourages or motivates you.

8) Create a music playlist. Music can play a major part in the way we feel. A great song can uplift you, whereas a sad song can play on your emotions. Create a playlist of songs which generate a positive response in you. This playlist should be readily available at any point in your day - so keep it on your MP3 player and copies in your car and other frequented places.

9) Learn new and different skills. Don't ever stop learning. You don't have to go to University or College to learn either. Something as simple as learning a new word everyday will keep you expanding. The internet means that delving into new skill areas is easier than ever. - so make use of it. If nothing else it will make you a more interesting person!

Take part in free sport and fitness challenges against competitors from all around the World.

Published At: 9 Easy Ways to Improve Your Life

5 Tips for Building Confidence and Self-Esteem

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 15:23:00 +0000

Building confidence and self-esteem is something that everyone should work on. There is nothing that gives you confidence more than success. I do not mean some remarkable success, but even knowing that you have managed to keep your desk tidy for a week can be a "success-event" for you.

1. Review Past Successes Often

One important factor in building confidence and self-esteem is taking five minutes to jot down or just re-envision past successes. Even if you have to go back to third grade to hoist them out again! I can remember one day in primary school that my teacher pinned my drawing up on top of the blackboard. The compliment she gave me on my first effort to draw an apple-tree, remained with me throughout school, and made me confident about art for the rest of my life. Everyone can remember moments when a friend, teacher or parent complimented them, however commonplace the incident was.

2. Learn to Compliment Yourself

It has been my experience when working with people that not many have great self-esteem and I believe it is the one area that we should consider, before charging on with goals and other success strategies. I have seen beautiful young women say that their nose was too short, their legs too long, their eyebrows too high etc. when often, I myself, was thinking "What a beautiful girl that is." People often think much better of us, than we do ourselves, so in building confidence and self-esteem, you can begin by learning to compliment yourself although, this thought may, at first, shock you.

3. Watch Your Own Self-Talk

The next point in building confidence and self-esteem is to watch what you say about yourself. Catch yourself, saying things like, "I made a mistake, as usual." "Just my luck that the tickets were sold out." "Glad you enjoyed the cake, I'm not good at cooking,"etc. Also, you must watch what you are saying to yourself. Are you unconsciously chastising yourself by saying, "I knew I would mess it up. Can't I do anything right for once?" Often your self-talk is much harsher than the criticism from others and it is definitely more repetitive!

4. Take Action and Challenge Yourself Everyday.

Learning to take some action that challenges you, is another vital point in building confidence and self-esteem. I have been teaching English for years to foreign businessmen, and one of their huge blocks was answering on the phone in English (for them a foreign language.) During the course, I would always slip in a little unexpected "authentic" phone call. It always surprised me, that after they had done this a few times, their anxiety about it dissipated. If they didn't understand, they learnt to ask the person speaking to repeat himself. Take a little action everyday to do something that you are a little shy of doing, whether it is taking over-ripe tomatoes back to the store, or telling your neighbour to turn down the volume of his t.v. after 12.p.m. because you need to sleep.

5. Learn to Program Your Subconscious Mind

Lastly, in building confidence and self-esteem, do not forget to learn to program your subconscious mind by repeating and saying out loud, positive affirmations. For years, the Self Growth movement has been advocating this, and yet how many people do it? Determine to practise these five tips, and you will find that slowly and surely, you will build confidence in yourself. The astounding thing is, that when you respect yourself, you find that others will respect you too. This, after all, is a Universe of Reflection. The Universe will reflect back, that which you give out.

Fastrack your progress by reprogramming the subconscious. I have many other practical tips in my report on "Becoming Your Best Self." Check on my site, below.

M.Elena Rogers is a vigorous proponent of Self Help, after having had extensive experience in the University, Education Field, in different countries, including Australia, U.K. and Perugia,Italy. Publisher, Editor and Founder of http://www.bestsuccessoptions.com

Published At: 5 Tips for Building Confidence and Self-Esteem

Photo: Michal Marcol / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

5 Things That Prevent People From Finding Love

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 14:49:00 +0000

You may have a friend or two who are single right now. While we know the situation that they have gone through or are going through, sometimes a little nudge from us still doesn’t seem enough to get them on their feet to find love.

Here are the some of the common reasons why some people can’t seem to find the love of their life. Whether they are consciously aware of it or not, you might know a friend who may have some of the following symptoms:

1. Work – With work hours becoming longer and managers becoming more demanding, a lot of people are spending late hours at the office or bringing home their work with them. Some people even enjoy the challenges of work and will opt to stay later for their own career advancement and enjoyment of work.

However, with the high demands of the work that they need to accomplish, people are finding less time to go out and socialize. Or if they were in relationships, not having time for their significant other proves to be detrimental to their relationship, thus, some relationships break down because there is just not enough ‘quality time’ that couples share together.

2. Living in a small town – In a small town, mingling with people of their certain age bracket may be difficult. They say that proximity is important in finding and meeting new people, and if the people in the area are limited, chances will be slim as well. Fact is, if you live in a town with limited population, then you have less people to meet.

3. Not trying new things – As it has been said, if you go to office and head straight home, there is a minimal chance that somebody will just pop out of your car window or your fridge. One must truly go out and socialize. And if there are hobbies and activities that interest them, they should try it out in order to meet available people with the same interests.

4. Family – Family must indeed truly come first; but if at times that the financial and time demands in taking care of the responsibilities are home becomes too large, it then takes the whole time of the person, not to mention work as well.

5. Religion – Demands at church or at a certain congregation may limit a person’s time in finding and meeting other people. While it may help that some do find their love interest at church, others who fall for someone belonging to another religion or sect may no longer pursue not continue a relationship with him or her because of their differences in religion.

Generally, giving someone your time and attention means giving that person your love. So if you are really interested in finding that love that you would hold on and cherish the rest of your life, do find time to find that person. Better yet, start becoming that person worthy of love and soon enough, you need not find him or her, but because of whom you’ve become – love will find you.

About Criss White: Criss White is a professional article writer for bridal, wedding, and various other topics. For more information and articles or to browse through some love wedding favors and other wedding favors, visit Bridal and Wedding Favors. Note: This article may be reprinted in your ezine, blog, or website as long as the credits remain intact and hyperlinks remain active.

Published At: 5 Things That Prevent People From Finding Love

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"If I'm Perfect, No One Will Reject Me" - Healing Perfectionism

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 11:52:00 +0000

Do you believe that being "perfect" gives you control over how people feel about you?"

If you do, then you are coming from 3 big false beliefs that are causing you much unhappiness.

FALSE BELIEF #1

"I can have control over how people feel about me."

Think for a moment whether or not others have control over how you feel about them. Can someone do everything "right" and be "perfect" in their own eyes, yet you don't enjoy being around them or you don't feel connected with them?

Of course!

Others may influence how you feel about them, but they have no control over how you feel about them. If you are a basically accepting person, then you might like them even if they get angry or withdrawn. If you are generally a judgmental person, then there may be little they can do for you to like them.

Now turn this around regarding how others feel about you. Since you have no control over whether or not another person is accepting or judgmental, it stands to reason that you also have no control over how they feel about you, regardless of how perfectly loving, open, caring, giving, understanding, handsome, beautiful, or rich you are.

FALSE BELIEF #2

"There is a standard of perfectionism and I can reach it."

I grew up believing that there was a "right" and "perfect" way to be. Then I learned that what I thought was right and perfect was not necessarily what others thought was right and perfect. In fact, it seemed that each person had a completely different understanding of what it means to be perfect!

This was quite distressing to me, as it took away my illusion of control over how people felt about me. At that time many years ago, I was terrified of rejection, so it gave me great comfort to believe that if only I was perfect enough, then I would never be rejected. Without a standard of perfection, what would be my guiding light to feel safe?

FALSE BELIEF #3

"I am basically flawed and need to strive to cover up my flaws and appear to be better than I am."

As long as I believed that I was basically flawed in some way, I was afraid of rejection. When I learned how to connect with my spiritual Guidance and see myself through the eyes of truth rather than through the eyes of my parents and others, I was able to see that my soul essence - my core Self - is already perfect, a perfect individualized expression of the Divine.

What was flawed were my beliefs that were programmed into me and needed to be healed.

HEALING PERFECTIONISM

Imagine how life would be for you if you knew that you were already perfectly wonderful and incredible just the way you are in your true Self? What if you could separate out the flawed, wounded, programmed part of you - the part you created to help you survive pain - from the magnificent part of you that God created. What if you could see that your ego wounded self - with all your fears and protections and ways of trying to have control over getting love and avoiding pain - is NOT who you are.

Then, instead of perfectionism being your guiding light, being fully and passionately yourself becomes your guiding light!

I assure you, this is a MUCH easier way to live!

About Margaret Paul, Ph.D

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process, featured on Oprah. Ready to join the thousands who have healed their pain and discovered their joy? Click here for a FREE Inner Bonding Course, and visit our website at www.innerbonding.com for more articles and help. Phone Sessions Available.

Published At: "If I'm Perfect, No One Will Reject Me" - Healing Perfectionism

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There Are Three Facets to All Relationships

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 15:17:00 +0000

Lasting relationships between two people have to be successful in three aspects. These are the three keys that can unlock the potential for positive interaction and fruitful effort in that association. A sympathetic similarity coupled with cooperativeness in the couples has to pervade their attitudes regarding personal beliefs, temperaments and social roles.

Similarity in beliefs

The idea of Deity, ethics and the objective of life can take on many varying shapes and perspectives. There are perspectives that make people intolerant of any other beliefs but their own. On the opposite side, there are points of view which welcome life in all its variations.

People who lived before our times were one in affirming their reverence for nature and her varied aspects. Before formal religions were institutionalized, men more or less shared common notions about the supernatural. These notions might be called by different names from region to region but the system was the same all throughout.

Recorded history is filled with stories of intolerance for the beliefs of others. That is probably the very reason why nations in our era do not even last for one millennium whereas in ancient times, the great civilizations lasted for thousands of years. This intolerance was especially felt in the area of religion. The great religions of our time formerly forbade their members to think for themselves. The rule was to rely on revealed truths. The whole problem was that each religion had its own set of such truths.

In the past, many individuals have preferred to forsake the ideas they were born with in order to unite with others who thought as they did.

We are lucky to be living in times when people, nations and religions prefer not to emphasize their differences anymore. They would rather work on how they and their beliefs are similar in order to encourage good relationship and cooperation.

Attraction to each other

Attraction has very little to do with physical beauty although sometimes beauty may be part of the attractiveness of a person. Not all beautiful people are approachable, some can actually repel others by their temperament. Attraction is a mixture of differences and similarities. When people with different temperaments are held together by their common goals, you have one of the most productive situations possible. Being different from the other is a good way to accomplish many things together that would have been impossible to do alone. Being similar is the glue which holds that cooperative effort together.

Creating lasting relationships on the basis of the fulfillment of need alone will most of the time be impossible. People will work with each other getting what they need for what they have in excess. But that will only be until they realize that they are basically unlike each other.

Roles in relationships should be compatible

The particular stations in life that have been selected by both parties involved have to be compatible for relationships to last. This is an even more important factor that just compatibility in temperament.

It is not possible for two equally aggressive persons to co-exist in a relationship. One will have to give in to the other. People who are used to take orders cannot continue that role in their personal lives. One will have to take charge over the other

A good relationship has to be striven for

In real life, very few people can make relationships work out without a good deal of effort. Most couples will be deficient in one or all of the three factors that a good association needs. And that is the beauty of it. The relationship is supposed to grow as the insight of the partners becomes clearer.

About Gerda R. Leon: Gerda R. Leon, relationship author, encourages couples to share a laugh while watching dancing videos, disgusting videos or funny animal videos.

Photo: David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Self Help Reading List – the Most Powerful Messages From the Most Popular Self Help Books

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 15:08:00 +0000

Self help books have become quite popular of late, as more and more people become interested in personal growth and development, which is turning out to be the only key to survival in this competition-ridden society.

1. Thought Vibration, Walter Atkinson - Attract Your Desires through the Vibration of Your Thoughts

Another one of the many self help books that focus on the law of attraction, the Thought Vibration explores the subject using a different and more radical perspective, making it quite a controversial self help book from an equally controversial author.

The main purpose of the book is to enlighten you on how to use your thoughts to attract what you want to get in life. It says that if you really set your mind on your desires, your thoughts will create such a powerful vibration that will simply magnet the subject of your desires straight to you.

Thought Vibration also teaches how to go through the process, which should begin with a clear and calm mind that is not limited by negative beliefs. The book is closely linked to the benefits of positive affirmations to train the mind and to remove limiting thoughts.

2. Rich Dad, Poor Dad, Robert Kiyosaki – Welcome Money and Prosperity with the Abundance Mindset

Rich Dad, Poor Dad is one of the most talked about self help books around. The book became a hit especially since it dwells mostly on money issues, which all people, regardless of age or background, can relate to.

The self help book dwells on how to invite money and prosperity into your life by seeing money making opportunities clearly instead of focusing on the negative state of the economy. It’s all about developing an “abundance mindset” rather than get drowned by the “scarcity mindset” that is so prevalent today.

3. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey – Change Results by Changing Perception and Interpretation

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People turned out to be one of the most influential books in the popular self help reading list. Although it was published way back in 1990, ripples of its influence can still be felt today.

Like the other books in this self help reading list, the 7 Habits revolve around the importance of changing your perception and interpretation of the world in changing results. This phenomenon was dubbed by author Covey as the “paradigm shift.” Covey wrote that the right perception can do wodners for your productivity and time management skills, making you an able and effective person.

4. NLP (Collins Need to Know?), Carolyn Boyes – Change Results by Changing Action

Another intriguing self help book is the NLP by Carolyn Boyes. The book revolves around NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming. The book teaches another way of changing one’s mindset, and how this simple act can pave the way for goal achievement.

The unique thing about the concept of NLP is that it begins with a change in action, which brings a change in results, which therefore changes one’s thinking. This is a modified version of the law of attraction, which begins with a changed thinking leading to a changed action and then changed results.

About Nelson Berry: Nelson Berry is The Pioneer of Subliminal Messages Online. Click Here Now for 4 Free Subliminal Messages Video Downloads (valued at $160)!

Photo: photouten / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

How to Get Over a Relationship Breakup - 5 Tips

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 15:27:00 +0000

What makes the world go 'round? Cynics will tell you that it's money, but when speaking from the heart most people will tell you that it's relationships that make the world turn. Romantic relationships play a big part in the happiness of most people. Besides the never-ending pursuit of wealth, knowledge, relaxation and fun, most of us spend a large portion of our time seeking, maintaining, or getting over a romantic relationship.

For those who have been through a relationship breakup, finding the courage to get over a failed relationship is not always easy. Often, feelings of resentment and anger can linger for months or even years after it is over.

If you want to know how to get over a relationship breakup, here are 5 tips for making it easier:

1. Recognize that each of you is an individual with different life purposes

One of the reasons that it can be so hard to get over a breakup is that most of us confuse our love for the other person with the question of whether we are meant to be with them. Relationships end for a range of reasons. However, often the reason that things end is that the couple simply find themselves on divergent paths. Their life purposes are just simply taking them in different directions.

2. You can only reach a healthy place once you untangle the issues that kept you in conflict

When you think back on your ex, it is likely that a mixture of positive and negative feelings well up inside of you. It can be very tempting to simply look at the relationship through rose-tinted glasses, seeing only the good things; you remember his or her look, facial expressions, kind gestures - even their smell.

However, it is easy to subconsciously suppress your memory of the various issues in your relationship that eventually drove the two of you apart. It is important to look at your relationship objectively, keeping in mind both the good and the bad.

3. You need to learn to distinguish between the issues and the person

At heart, you need to learn to be able to view the person in your mind's eye for who they are in their essence: a loving individual who has many great qualities. However, the same time, you are encouraged to view the very real problems and issues that existed between you objectively. Remember, the person can still be a great person, while at the same time you can recognize that the issues that arose had to do with your interaction (or relationship) with him or her.

4. Do some journaling to get your feelings out and onto paper

At this point, it is a good idea to start keeping a journal that details the journey of your heart through this relationship, including how you have functioned in the aftermath of the breakup. Journaling has a wonderful, healing quality that will allow you to separate the person from the issues in your mind and heart, as suggested above.

5. If your relationship still has a chance, put together a plan to make it happen

As you journal, you may discover that you still believe the two of you should be together, even today. If that is your conclusion, be sure to put together a plan to get back together with him or her.

Consider these 5 tips for how to get over a relationship breakup.

About Susan Willis: Get expert relationship advice from someone who has helped thousands of couples get back together at: Find The Love Again.

Photo: nuttakit / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Self Improvement Book: The Skinny On Success

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 10:41:00 +0000

The Skinny On Success: Why Not You?

By: Jim Randel

RAND Publishing

http://theskinnyon.com

Paperback (204 pages): $14.95

Ebook: $9.95

The Skinny On Success Book

Ninety-nine percent of the world’s success goes to those people who find the courage to pursue their dreams with everything they have. We do not believe that success is somehow reserved for the smartest, most talented, best-looking or even the luckiest. We believe that the likelihood of your achieving your goals and aspirations is a direct function of the heart and will you bring to the pursuit.

This book will help you reflect upon your potential. We do not patronize with the bromide “you can be anything you want to be.” The truth is that there are some limitations and factors beyond your control. Still, what everyone can do is maximize the likelihood of our success. In other words, we can take steps to improve our chances.

Each of us has enormous upside potential. Our observation is that most people aim too low – not too high. Far too many people underestimate their potential and the heights to which they can climb. We hope this book will find its way into the hands of such people, and that it will inspire them to reach a bit higher.

Top Ten Lessons on Success

1. Success stories commonly boil down to tales of ordinary people with the courage to take action in the pursuit of something they felt strongly about, and the will to persist against all setbacks.

2. Successful people prepare for the journey from where they are to where they want to be.

3. Successful people do everything they can to maximize the probability of their success.

4. Successful people take action.

5. Successful people learn to combat the fear of failure.

6. Successful people work on their mental fortitude.

7. Successful people train themselves to see the glass half-full.

8. Successful people are very hard workers.

9. Successful people persevere.

10. Successful people believe in right and wrong.

For more information, please visit TheSkinnyOn.com now

Anxiety Self Help - Your Basics Guide

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 10:36:00 +0000

Anxiety is a condition where you undergo constant worry and fear about various situations that shouldn't actually bother you. It is when this constant fear and anxious state interferes with your work and family life, it is said that you suffer from General Anxiety Disorder.

Common symptoms of general anxiety disorder are stress, sickness, digestive disorders and frequent tearful episodes. The sufferer can experience irrational fear of being outside, sense inability to complete simple tasks, feel unvalued and have not even little respect of himself. It is essential that treatment is sought or self help information obtained in order to break the cycle, as opposed to simply worrying over the matter even more.

Anxiety is a very common problem and self help information is widely available. There are many ways to combat the effects of anxiety, some may be useful to an individual but some may not. It is advisable to find a method which is suitable for you.

Find out the trigger for your anxiety attack

The first thing to be done towards your attempt of preventing your anxiety attacks is to discover the causative factor. This is an assessment form of work that you will have to perform to discover the thing that causes your anxiety. Thus, you will be able to heal anxiety without the help of medications.

Make a list of factors and circumstances that you know can cause an attack and review this list carefully afterwards. Consider each potential trigger on your list, and then rank them in order of priority. This will help you determine what to address first.

There are many things that can trigger an anxiety attack. Fear, latent after-effects of a traumatic experience, phobias, and even foods are only some of them. You must identify which specific things cause your anxiety.

Next Step - Avoid these triggers

Next, in order to solve your episode of anxiety, shun the things or circumstances that prompt your anxiety. If you feel it somewhat difficult to perform, you can also modify your diet. Excess amounts of caffeine in foods like energy drinks, coffee and aerated water will build up pressure and anxiety in your body since caffeine is known to excite panic attacks.

Introduce more liquids to your diet and avoid alcohol as it excites your brain. If you are hooked to alcohol, at least limit your consumption. Introduce a regular exercise regimen to your daily routine to act as an outlet to vent your stress and anxiety.

Practice regular meditation and yoga

Meditation and yoga relax the mind and body, and are very helpful in controlling anxiety. Getting a full night of sleep at least seven hours per night is absolutely critical to successfully overcome anxiety.

Anger control is also very important in dealing with anxiety. Try to be tolerant and patient, as uncontrolled anger is a major anxiety trigger. Bringing anger under control also reduces anxiety levels. Start using these anxiety self-help tips, and you will be on your way to controlling and curing your anxiety attacks.

About Barbara Thomson: Are you looking for in depth information about anxiety self help, then visit Barbara Thomson's Anxiety Self Help Blog at www.AnxietySelfHelpBlog.com.

Photo: David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Successful Thinking Habits

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 11:52:00 +0000

We form idea's in our heads to affect our behavior whether from friends, family, or school.

1. The negative land of "W" - wishing you were there - wishing you were somewhere else - wasting time These are all disappointment, wallowing, and wishing. The positive land of "W" - feel charged up - feel energized - things feel good - working hard - willing to listen. These are where you want to achieve.

2. Uncover your blocks - look at when you are not getting things done - doing something else - blocking - know what your weaknesses are

3. Identify your scripts - I can do this - I will have fun - I am going to feel great. These are positive scripts - I can't do this - I can't do math - this is a nightmare .These are negative scripts If you start with a negative script though and realise it, you can turn it around and think positive thoughts instead. Switching scripts * think positive =)

4. Voice the goals - say out load what you want - make commitments

5. Effective use of time

6. Confidence and Chutzpha - chatzpha means be bold - Believe in Yourself

7. Stamina and Persistance - understanding - know that people with stamina are successful

8. Do it now - you won't have as much to do if you do it when you get it

So what ever you do think positive and remember about the land of "W"

Article From: ArticleBuilder.net

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Self Improvement Book: The Skinny On The Art of Persuasion

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 12:12:00 +0000

The Skinny On The Art of Persuasion: How to Move Minds

By: Jim Randel

RAND Publishing

http://theskinnyon.com

Paperback (182 pages): $14.95

Ebook: $9.95

The Skinny On The Art of Persuasion Book

Persuasion: the act of convincing, influencing, or inducing.

Great persuaders – people who can get into your brain and massage your cerebrum. Wow! What is more powerful than that?

Our team here at The Skinny On has studied great persuaders going back hundreds of years. We synthesized 35 very respected, very wordy books into 182 pages of straight-to-the-point insight. We learned that persuasiveness is an acquired skill. There are principles, techniques and strategies that you can develop to boost your persuasive powers.

This book will help you improve your persuasiveness. When you’re able to persuade others to your point of view – when you can move minds – then you can do just about anything. In fact, in almost every endeavor in life, the more persuasive you are, the more likely you will be successful.

What You’ll Learn – The Nine Rules of Persuasion

1. Likeability works.

2. Prepare. Then prepare again.

3. Listen and watch.

4. Scarcity pushes people to act.

5. People want to be consistent.

6. Create a sense of reciprocity.

7. In lieu of analysis, people equate price and value.

8. People follow crowds, celebrities, and authority figures.

9. Decisions are all about emotions.

For more information, please visit TheSkinnyOn.com now

Best Time Management Book: The Skinny On Time Management

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 14:46:00 +0000

The Skinny on Time Management: How to Maximize Your 24-Hour Gift

By: Jim Randel

RAND Publishing

http://theskinnyon.com

Paperback (136 pages): $14.95

Ebook: $9.95

The Skinny on Time Management Book

Nearly 100 books and articles on time management were digested and synthesized to write this book. What did we learn? The whole process was a waste of time!

Every source said the same things. There are about 50 principles of time management that you need to know. Once you learn them, you have everything you need. All 50 principles are addressed in The Skinny on Time Management.

Top Ten Time Management Lessons

1. Self-Awareness is the ‘sine qua non.’

2. Goal-setting is the first step.

3. Choices are tough.

4. You can ‘create’ time.

5. Procrastination is the enemy.

6. Aim for ‘a mind like water.’

7. Planning and preparation are worth the effort.

8. When you prioritize, you separate the wheat from the chaff.

9. Single-minded focus is where it’s at.

10. Pick and chose the time management techniques that work for you.

For more information, please visit TheSkinnyOn.com now

How to Get Over Your Fear to Drive

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 09:04:00 +0000

Do you have that fear to get on behind the wheel? Do not fret. You are not the only one. There are actually millions of people out there who never apply for a driver's license or drive an automobile because of their fears.

However, at some point or the other, you may have to learn how to drive. It may be part of your job, or you may have a growing family who needs a vehicle to commute. So as early as now, you may want to purge that fear and learn how to drive:

1. Know the reason for the fear.

There should be a much deeper explanation why you are afraid to take the wheels. You may tremble at vehicular accident statistics that result to death and very grave injuries. You may have relatives and friends who met their untimely demise, or you have met unruly drivers before.

Take some time to fully understand your fear. When you already have the cause, it is easier for you to find the right solution.

2. Do not self-teach.

If you want to learn how to drive and get rid of the fear, then do not rely on yourself alone. Discover driving with the help of an expert. There are plenty of professional driving schools within your area. These experts will not only teach you how to drive, but will also show you tricks and techniques to greatly reduce your chances of meeting accidents or even dying from driving.

3. Boost your self-confidence.

A good reason why you do not like to drive is you are not confident of your skills. You may want to boost it further, so you can have enough courage to hold the wheels. Make use of subliminal messages to help you out. Some of the subliminal messages that can be applied are the following:

I am letting go of the fear to drive.
I have nothing to fear when it comes to driving.
I am a careful driver.
I can definitely protect myself and my loved ones when on the road.

You can repeat these subliminal messages when you are losing your self-esteem. You can also make these a part of your meditation or visualization.

4. Meditate.

Make sure you do not drive with a very cluttered mind. You should also not be carrying heavy emotions or thoughts. You can count on meditation to help you get rid of them. Moreover, meditation can calm your tensed nerves and muscles, so you will feel more relaxed and less panicky when you are driving.

5. Learn the roads and rules.

You will less likely meet an accident if you are just going to be more familiar with the roads and the street rules. You should also check your vehicle all the time. All parts should be in tip-top condition.

The truth is being a good driver does not guarantee complete safety. Nevertheless, you can definitely reduce bad possibilities if you just stick to the laws and be focused in what you're doing.

About Nelson Berry: Nelson Berry is The Pioneer of Subliminal Messages Online. Click Here Now for 4 Free Subliminal Messages Video Downloads (valued at $160)!

Photo: graur razvan ionut / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The Keys to Winning

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 14:39:00 +0000

It has been said that everyone wants to be a winner, however they define winning. Ever since Napoleon Hill spent more than 20 years to study successful people and organized them into amazing works like "Think and Grow Rich" and "Law of Success", many more successful people have been closely observed and extensively studied by other researchers. These people are the winner in their own field, as well as in life.

Today, we learned so much about winning that it makes winning become a lot easier than it used to be. In fact, with the right knowledge and concentrated effort from your part, winning is as predictable as the sun rising in the east and setting in the west.

Here are the three keys to winning.

1) Attitude

To be a winner, one must possess great attitude. Attitude is the composite of thoughts, feelings, and actions. Therefore, it's vitally important to have a great attitude, because thought leads to feeling, feeling leads to action, which in turn produce the result.

The good new is, attitude is a choice. It's something that you have complete control over, no matter what are the external problems or conditions. Attitude and result are inseparable. Attitude is the cause, and result is the effect. Positive attitude allow you to respond to the external challenge in a positive manner, whereas negative attitude will let you react to the same challenge in a negative way, which will eventually determine the result that you will get.

Therefore, cultivating a winning attitude is the first key to winning.

2) Empowering Beliefs

Second key to winning is to have an empowering belief system. The opposite of empowering belief is self-limiting belief. Self-limiting beliefs hold more people back from winning than any other factors. Most people have self-limiting belief due to the way they have been raised, the environmental conditioning, peer's influence, and media influence. It's very hard to get ahead in life by having self-limiting beliefs deeply ingrained in your brain. It's like driving a car with the emergency brake still on, you can work very hard, but you'll be making little or no progress.

It's therefore important to replace the self-limiting beliefs with empowering beliefs. The law of belief says that whatever you believe, with feeling, becomes your reality, whether or not the belief is true. The more intensely that you believe something to be true, the more likely it is that it will be true for you. So, your empowering beliefs will actually leads you into taking positive action and eventually achieve your goal.

You can cultivate positive beliefs through reading biographies and autobiographies of successful people, reading books on positive thinking and personal development, as well as associate with successful and positive people. All these will change your reference point and instill positive belief in you. Attitude and belief are closely link with each other, they work hand in hand, and one reinforces the other. So when you have developed positive attitude, it will be easier to develop positive belief.

3) Habits

The last key to winning in life is habit. Behavioral psychologists have estimated that habit determined more than 95% of what you think and what you do on a daily basis and because of that, habit has the power to determine your destiny. And since what you think and what you do will inevitably determine the result you are getting, it's overwhelmingly clear that habit is the essential component in the process of getting the result you want.

You can turn positive mental attitude and empowering belief into habits. In fact, that could be the most important habits that you can form, because it will serve you extremely well for the rest of your life. These are the internal habits.

External habits are equally vital. Some of the external habits include your working habits, planning, the way you run your day, and the way you get along with people.

Here is an exercise that will change your life for the better. Identify five winning habits that you need to form this year, and do whatever it takes to develop those habits. This is probably the most important idea that you will learn in this article, because that will change your life like night and day. After all, as mentioned earlier, your habits will determine your destiny.

In summary, when you develop winning attitude, winning beliefs system, and winning habits, winning is automatic. When these three keys to winning are in alignment, and you put your acts together, nothing can stop you from winning. You will be unstoppable.

Jack Ooi is a businessman who run a successful financial planning practice. He is also a dedicated student and practitioner of strategies of success, law of universe, and personal improvement.

Visit http://achiever-zone.info to learn the scientifically proven method to achieve success and wealth.

Photo: Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

How to Overcome Negative Thinking

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 04:30:00 +0000

The Snowball Effect

Oh my God, It’s four Pm!!
I should arrive there within a maximum of 10 minutes
But what if I didn’t arrive on time!
I may miss a part of the exam, that’s really terrible I can’t afford to lose any more marks
And if I didn’t do well in this exam my mood will get a blow
Now with bad grade in one more subject I could fail this year!!
And if I didn’t graduate earlier I may not find a job!! After all there seems to be a recession on doors.

HEY HEY STOP!!!!! You are only late for 10 minutes and now you are thinking about failing and a recession !! Don’t laugh at this story because we all do exactly the same thing but without noticing, it all starts by a small seed, the unwanted event, then negative thinking turns the samll seed to a big tree and sometimes a forest!!

Why do you think your mood suddenly swings without an apparent reason? It’s the snowball effect, a tiny event may have happened but your self talk kept expanding it until it became a catastrophe. Although the above example may be a little exaggerated, if you just watched your self talk you will discover that you even create larger snow balls out of nothing!! What’s really funny is that, in most cases, the event that happened will have no bad impact on your life at all and even if it did, it would be a minimal impact compared to your imagined huge snowball.

What Negative Thinking Can Do

Lots of people ask me whether negative thinking is the cause for lack of self confidence or not, in fact, negative thinking is not the cause for lack of self confidence but negative thinking is the direct agent that interacts with your beliefs and so it’s what’s responsible for changing your idea about yourself. For example, if negative thinking was used to reinforce a false belief about your looks then most probably the result will be lack of self confidence.

In other words, negative thinking is the tool used by your mind to eat out your self confidence, to swing your mood and to even depress you. One other dangerous thing about negative thinking is that your emotions does not change except after a few phrases of self talk are played in your mind, so any unwanted emotional change that happens to you is caused by negative thinking or negative self talk.

How to Overcome Negative Thinking

Life is full of annoying events and if each event left you with a negative snow ball then you will stay down forever. If you want to avoid this then you should follow some of these practices in order to minimize your negative thinking:

* Don’t create snow balls:

Sometimes we cant hold ourselves from having negative thoughts, if that’s the case, then don’t grow these negative thoughts bigger and just focus on how to deal with the new situation

* Accept the Change:

When an unexpected event happens we usually go through some stages before we return back to our previous mental state. The last one of these steps is acceptance and the one just before it is bargaining. In bargaining the person usually keeps thinking of the reasons that caused the bad event and of the bad consequences that will follow, usually this is the stage where negative thinking is at its peak, if you want to move away faster from this stage then you must learn how to accept the new events. Acceptance may sound like an intuitive advice but its not, if you want to be able to accept new and unexpected events then you should know about the psychology of acceptance, this article will explain to you everything about acceptance and it will give you the Know-how of acceptance.

* Have Faith:

In the middle of the darkness there is usually no room for positive thinking, after all, why have a positive attitude while there is no possible way out? And here comes faith into play, faith is the only thing that can withstand the worst unexpected life events yet keep you optimistic. I don’t like the idea of believing in God just because we need a God and that’s why I am not asking you to do so, but i am only asking you to seek your answers, if you don’t believe in God then search for him in order to know whether you are on the right track or whether you should belief in him.

Want to have a solid self understanding?

Check out www.2knowmyself.com

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How to Stop Being Impulsive in Shopping

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 16:39:00 +0000

Do you always have the urge to purchase something even when you're not in a department store? Are you spending thousands of dollars over goods that you don't really need? Do you spend a lot of time looking for potential items online? There's a huge chance that you've transformed yourself into an impulsive shopper.

You should learn to curb your impulsiveness, or else, you may find yourself in deep economic trouble. You will not only get to spend a lot of money for things you don't really need, but you will also not save anything. Worse, if you're using credit cards, you may not be able to make prompt payments anymore, damaging your credit rating and your name in the process.

Here are some ways on how you can better control yourself:

1. Determine the main reason for the issue

Why are you in such a state? Many of those who buy impulsively are actually people who live in insecurity. They want to surround themselves with things, hoping they can obtain satisfaction. They may be jealous or envious of what other people have. It's the root cause you need to curb, so you can put an end to your impulsion.

2. Avoid using your credit cards

Every time you buy don't use your credit cards. That will minimize your debts as well as force you to keep track of your cash in hand. This will also stop you from purchasing items online.

3. Come up with a sound plan

The moment you receive your salary, take a portion of it for savings and pay off your debts first. Then you can spend the rest however you like.

4. Surround yourself with financial-conscious people

You can talk to economic experts or shop with friends and family members who are known to have excellent control of their money. They can definitely teach you a lot of ways on how to effectively control your spending by preventing you from purchasing anything.

5. Teach yourself to be more confident

Your emotions can sometimes force you to shop without any good reason. This is called retail therapy. If you can just get over them, you may be able to stop your dilemma too.

You can utilize the different subliminal messages to eliminate the negative emotions and thoughts. The purpose of using subliminal messages is to fill your subconscious mind with positive thoughts. This way you can build your confidence and realize there are a lot of things to hope for. Some of the subliminal messages you can use are the following:

Tomorrow is another day to correct my past mistakes.
I am in control of my spending habits.
I don't allow my emotions govern my finances.
I am taking control over these negative emotions.
I picture myself not dwelling on negative thoughts.

The truth is impulsive shopping is something you can control, provided that you're willing to make a change. Be more open to modifying your bad behavior with these tips, and may just save yourself from a lot of headaches later.

About Nelson Berry: Nelson Berry is The Pioneer of Subliminal Messages Online. Click Here Now for 4 Free Subliminal Messages Video Downloads (valued at $160)!

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9 Honest Steps to Success

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 16:40:00 +0000

Step 1. Have a dream.

If you have no dream, just a vague outline, nothing will happen. Your destination must be crystal clear.

Work at creating in your mind the desired outcome this success will create for you. Whether it is success in relationships, or a financial success or athletic success, visualizing the outcome is a crucial step. Be completely sure of the result you want.

For instance if you are looking for a compatible partner for a long lasting successful relationship- take the time to write down what characteristics you are looking for. What traits are important to you to create and maintain a long-term relationship?

If you are unsure of what a long-term successful relationship requires, get around people who have them, and find out what makes that relationship work

If it's a sport or athletic goal - what result are you looking for? Visualize that result. How do you feel when you can truly see it? Remember that feeling.

If it's a financial goal - an amount of money is never a good motivator. A dollar amount is a good measure of how your plan is working, but it has no emotional value, no hook Lifestyle is the key. So find people who have the lifestyle you want and get around them, as much as you can. Look at houses they have, the cars, the holidays and vacations. Take time to visit open house dream homes, walk through those houses, and imagine they are yours. Visit car dealerships that have the cars that lifestyle has. Sit in those cars, imagine they are yours.

Imagine for instance the perfect day in your life. Who is with you? Where are you? Where are you living? What is the weather like? And so on.

Another great way of keeping the dream alive and in front of you is to find a photograph that can represent that dream, and look at it every day

It's never about money - it's what the money buys that gives you satisfaction. Be sure of what your success lifestyle requires

STEP 2. Create a plan that will honestly and without doubt achieve that dream for you.

Be very clear-eyed about this plan. If you want a certain house in a certain area, and time to enjoy it - how much does that cost? Don't forget taxes, and up keep and furniture and all that goes with such a lifestyle. Does your plan allow you to create this kind of income? Make sure you are able to have time to enjoy it?

STEP 3. Break your plan down into bite size pieces.

What do you have to do every day for that plan to work, What do have achieve at the end of a week, a month a quarter. And be honest with yourself, start from where you are, not where you think you should be, or would like to be. Be clear, honest and aware, make sure your plan starts from where you are. And make sure the pieces of the plan make the whole, and most important - that the daily and weekly work is doable. Don't set impossible work goals. Work from where you are, with steps you know you can accomplish

STEP 4. Build in failure.

If you don't achieve a goal within your chosen time frame. Check your plan. Is it still workable, does it still make sense?. If not adjust the part that needs adjusting then reload the plan and start again. It's not how long it takes you that is important. It's getting there that is everything

STEP 5. Associate with people who have achieved that particular goal, or dream.

The most effective motivator in the world is other people who already have the lifestyle you want. In fact the greatest teacher in the world is other people. That's how we learn to talk as babies - by associating with adults. If those adults speak Mandarin, we automatically speak Mandarin. If they speak English, we speak English. If they have three languages we learn all three, by osmosis as it were.

Association is the most powerful influence in the world. Who you associate with - you become. If you associate with people who make about $50,000 a year,that's how much you will ever make. If you associate with people who make $20,000 a year, that's your income. It's almost impossible to change your situation without changing your environment.

Associate with people who already have what you want - it's the guaranteed elevator to success

STEP 6. Be aware of what you need to give up to achieve your goals and dreams.

To move from where you are to somewhere else, requires change. As we all have heard, you cannot keep doing the same thing and expect different results. To create a successful lifestyle, whether in sports or finance or relationships, you will be required to change. Perhaps you will not be able to watch as much T.V. as you now do, or play your favorite game of golf, or see your friends everyday. You will have to give up things to achieve things. Be prepared.

STEP 7. Find a trustworthy group who will hold you accountable to your work habits.

Not a group who will nag or complain. A group who you trust and hold in high esteem. A group who believe in you and your goals and will be generous and honest in holding you to your goals.

STEP 8. Work the plan, all of it, and consistently.

It's no good having an excellent plan if there is no action. All action produces results, and it doesn't matter if the results are successful or not. Remember you learn as much or more from your failures as form your success. Work your plan.

STEP 9 Never, ever,ever quit.

Change the workload, change the plan, change the time frame - but never quit

martin gover writes on a strange subjects - check them out here- http://martingover.com. Thats not strange - but some of the stuff is. strange? - I mean...diverse.Yes I mean diverse online-internet-business-online http://martingover.com.

Published At: 9 Honest Steps to Success

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7 Ways You Can Feel Better About Yourself

noreply@blogger.com (Adil Syed) — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 11:55:00 +0000

You should not feel bad if self-confidence doesn’t just ooze out of your pores. Lots of people have experiences that lead them to become self-conscious and to think less of themselves than they should. We are all influenced by different things, but we can all feel down sometimes and somehow it’s always easier to be more critical of ourselves than we are of others. Comparison, however, are a bad idea. They lead to feelings of inadequacy, leaving us feeling like we should be something we never can.

These seven tips are written to help you see that you have worth just how you are. What needs to change is your attitude and your self-perception.

1. Practice looking confident. Get away from those pessimistic thoughts just long enough to work on displaying yourself in a way that looks confident—whether you feel like it or not. Hold your shoulders back and your head up. Look up with your head held high; don’t stare at the ground or ponder your shoelaces. Sometimes all it takes is acting confident to be confident.

2. Stop subscribing to Cosmo and all of those fashion magazines unless you are willing to accept that those models and celebrities are totally airbrushed. Not even the models look like that. Fancy lighting and heavy makeup can make anyone look good. Your friends and family don’t love you because you look like a model. So you don’t have to hate yourself for not looking like one.

3. Devote your spare time to a new hobby. Get involved with something that interests you and has the potential to make you feel better about yourself. Learn military self defense at a self defense training course. Or, if it’s easier start training with a Self Defense DVD. Take a cooking class, enroll in a pottery or photography class. Learn a new language or learn to play a new instrument. But do something to expand your horizons.

4. Set new goals and track your progress. Start small if you need to or plan big. Save money for that vacation you always wanted to take or write that play you’ve had bouncing around in your brain for the past 5 years.

5. Challenge yourself to do something good for yourself every day. Meditate, take a walk, read a new book, cook yourself a healthy meal—do whatever you need to relax.

6. Look for ways to change your perspective and be the kind of person you admire. Journal your thoughts and write down what you like about yourself. Then write down things that you want to be able to say about yourself and look for ways to be more patient, funny, bold, free, honest, and loyal. Imitate the characteristics you admire in the people you love. And be brave enough to say out loud what you like about yourself.

7. Take time to think about the really big, important things. Believe in something bigger you are and realize that the world doesn’t depend on you being America’s Next Top Model to get something of value from your life.

About William F. Gabriel: For more information about military self defense, please check out Self Defense DVD.

Published At: 7 Ways You Can Feel Better About Yourself

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