Blog of a little Muffin

Robin Williams

2014-08-12T17:21:00.000-07:00

As I lie here in bed just before im going to drift of to sleep I check my twitter news feed. The tragic news of Robin Williams was broke last night and for the past 24 hours I can't bring myself to read any of the tributes that had been put out for him other than my own. Well now I face it. I cry...im crying now.
Why? I did not know this man personally and I have never cried at the death of another celebrity before. Well there are a few reasons I believe.
For many of us Robin Williams was a boloved childhood fixture. We grew up with him make us laugh and bringing us joy. He taught me what it was to be funny and to this day its the thing I strive for the most. To make people laugh like he could, to have people embrace you whole heartedly the way he could. To have people hang of his every word, and making every individual feel special even though he was reaching an audience of millions. Robin Williams was not someone I just looked up to but he was someone whos brought an remarkable light to this world and someone who I strived to be. He is the reason I wanted to be funny over everything else. I felt like I knew that incredible man even though he'd inly ever been on my screen. It takes a special kind of person to connect to people the way he could.

The other reason ive recognised as to why im so desperatly sad as to the death of Robin Williams is how he passed.

Its the strangest thing to me that someone with such a bright light can have places with in them that are so dark. But yet personally knowing and understanding the struggles that Robin must have been going through to commit such an act it didnt come as much of a shock as it should. Sometimes we find those laughing the loudest are those that have the most to hide. Depression is not something we should be taking lightly and suffering with it myself it deeply saddens me that it took the death of such a beloved icon for depression to become a publicly discussed topic rather than some fletting story in the newspapers. Depression knows no bounds and it can touch anyone.

Robins death was not something I expected to take so hard, and I can't begin to imagine what his family and loved ones must be going through if I just a simple fan feel this much greife. My love and prayers go out to them.

I wanted to say so much more but the ability to put into words how this man has touched my life and the life of so many others,and the gaping whole he leaves behind eludes me. I think ill leave with this quote I read today that seems fitting "Just because you're struggling, doesn't mean you're failing"

R.I.P Robin Williams -gone but most certainly not forgotten

Getting started

2014-02-09T10:44:00.001-08:00

In life often the hardest step is the first one.

I really resinate with this at the moment, and for a mixture of reasons.

First of my anxiety.

My fear of faluire stops me In any persute to make life better for my self. An unfortunate charecteristic I've inherited from my father. I cant tell you how frustating it is. Logically my thought pattern is encouraging "Just go for it" "everyone has to start somewhere" "you can do this"

Then the dark cloud of anxiety creeps in and so does the "ill do it later" "im not good enough or qualified enough"

The success storys come from thoose who take risks but I can never seem to take that leep.

Secondly,I dont have a clue where to start !

I have so many ideas and want to do so many different things. I can see my end goal but I dont know how to get my foot in the door. Heck I dont even know where the door is. This problem only fuels my anxiety.

People always say, dont reveal your weakness. "Fake it till you make it" and im sure that works for most. But for those of you who know exactly what im talking about I hope this blog shows you that you are not alone.

It would be amazing if down in the comments people could share there getting started storys. How they got to where they want to be in life and tips on how I could get started...with anything :)

I'd love to read all your storys

Much love

On my Travels

2014-02-03T14:26:00.002-08:00

Well you may of may not know depending on who you may be, that this 2014 i wanted to travel a lot more. Especially in my own little country, England

The first of February came around and i made my first little adventure out and the first place i wanted to visit was Brighton.

So yes me and some of my flat mates made the journey to Brighton and what a lovely place it is. I took plenty of photos and thought i would share some of them here with you.

Brighton has some beautiful graffiti....

(street art, what ever you fancy calling it)

So yes i had a wonderful day in Brighton. Even if it was rainy and windy. Lucky one of my flat mates is from this area so we had are very own personal tour guide.

Not sure where im going to visit next. Im thinking maybe Dover.

Maybe Cambridge... any suggestions of beautiful places to visit ?

Leave me a comment if you fancy.

Much love

moments of paradise

2014-01-28T05:29:00.001-08:00

Ever needed to escape ? Just have a mental pause and find your bliss?

Yeah me too.

Well ive found it.

My place of monetary solitude,peace and relaxation.

Since being at uni ive found my self at a much higher stress level than ive ever been at before. Although my mum is only onthe other end of the phone sometimes I need that little bit more help coping and fo me that has been to take mental breaks.

It started out with a mid day snooze here and there but as the stress pilled on and I again was struggling to cope I found my mid day naps becoming 3hour sleeps. As much a I love sleep it was becoming a little impractical.I dont know if any of you have had a regual mid day 3 hour sleep sesh but if you have good luck going to sleep before 4 in the morning.

This is where ive started my new hobby.

Taking my kindle,going for a walk to a cafe. Eat and drink in said cafe whilst reading my book for an obnoxiously long amount of time in conparison to how much food ive brought.

Now I know this isnt exactly a revolutionary idea and plenty of people find joy in doing this but jees am I glad that ive jumped on the band wagon. If im honest I had forgotten how much I loved reading till I went through 10 books in a month. The food part of this activity is always joyous awell.

So where am I right now ? You guessed it in a cafe looking out the window, eating and drinking. Taking a quick reading break to write this little blog post.

This is bliss, if only for a moment.

Go find yours.

Much love

And its arrived !

2014-01-03T11:44:00.001-08:00

Yes, its tue. I tell no lie.

2014 is finnaly here and by jove I am happy to see it.

So three days in to the new year what have I been doing ?

Shopping.

Mostly.

Shopping and eating.

Oh how very insprirational of me ( hope you detect the hint of sarcasum there)

Well my little bloggletts its okay because this years reolution was to be more happy and positive. Do what makes me smile and to not be so hard on myself,and im doing just that.

Normally my reolutions include the whole weight loss vibe and yes I would like to loose some weight but the pressure of it makes me put on more weight. So ill just take it easy on the whole weight situation.

Next week I have lots of visits with friends so ill try and take some pictures for you beautiful lot.

Keep smiling, much love.

Xxx

2014...?

2013-12-30T17:11:00.000-08:00

Well my little bloglets 2014 really is just around the corner now, and oh my hasnt my blog suffered some serioise neglect.

Well 2014 im waiting for ya, cause I gots some big ideas for the year. Now I cant make any promises blogletos as lets just face it and be honest. Im lazy. However as cliche as it sounds I really do feel like its the start of a blank slate, and I really do want nore from this little space of the internet if mine. So all fingers crossed you will be seeing some more blogs from me. Things I need to iron out however... where do I want to take this blog? I feel it needs more of a direction. With direction comes focus and with focus comes inspiration. So stay tuned for that one.

Well as 2014 is lingering on our doorsteps,lets have a quick recap of 2013's highlights.

This year I turned the grand old age of 21 (which I belive is a milestone in most countrys) and I celebrated in style by taking my first ever trip on the london eye and only went to blooming Disneyland Paris.

Not only did i turn 21 this year but I also started my first year at university. ( I know im a late bloomer)

I took a trip to Alton Towers in April which I had always wanted to go to.

I PMed my first show, cutesy of a good friend.

I flew for the first time on my own to Northern Ireland to visit a friend.

I went to london with a bunch from uni and took a tour of the BBC studios.The same day, I sat in the audience for the Wright Stuff and got to meet Mark Wright. I remeber this day being particularly awesome as Mark answered loads of questions about the entertainment business for us (as did the rest of the crew) and how to get into it.

I went to the Harry Potter Making tour. Which was brilliant btw.

Do you know,its so uplifting to look back at the highlights of the year. I think you forget just how much you actually do. I can only hope and work hard toward making 2014 even better.

Abd iI guess this shall be it for now my lovelies.

Stay tuned and make 2014,

AMAZING.

Much love xxx

3:43 AM

2013-09-09T20:23:00.002-07:00

So what do you do at 3:43 in the morning ?

Well sleep would be my first answer, but alas sleep alludes me.

So whats the next option?

Online shop and trawl the dark scary places of You Tube.

You know the places, the videos about people drinking nail varnish

and cray cray stuff like that.

I also tend to watch a million clips of old Ellen interviews :)

Man i love Ellen

Well this is a very rambly blog post...

but it is 3:43 in the morning, what do you expect ?

cough*its now 3:57am* cough

What did i buy online you ask ?

well, its only my mothers birthday next week.

So i brought her a lovely set of bed sheets.

Hay that's what she likes, so why not :)

but shhh dont tell her its meant to be a secret.

And whats the best way to keep a secret ?

Post it all over the internet :P

I also got a dictaphone since im off to start uni in only

2 WEEKS !! ARRRGGGgghhhh

So i thought that was a good little thing to have for my lectures.

Anyways i best go my lovely's and try and get some sleep

Have a beautiful day,night whenever your reading this

Much love

Flying from the nest

2013-09-01T14:41:00.001-07:00

Moving day looms on me now my friends.

The arrival of September brings feeling of excitement and angst.

With 20 days left, the countdown has well and truly begun and it has really started to sink in.

Now maybe i'm making too much of a big deal of this, i am only moving to university so i will be back and forth, but to me it is a big deal.

I feel like its going to be a big mile stone in my life, something that will change me.

For the better i hope.

Has anyone else had any moments where your aware that

'yeah i am going to be changed, from this time'

I think that is kind of a big deal

Fingers crossed for the future

Movie 43 review

2013-08-20T15:09:00.000-07:00

So last night i watched a little film called Movie 43,

well i say little but with the amount of big names that appear in it little probably isn't the right word.

I thought that i would give you guys a quick review on what i thought.

So sit back, relax and have a read.

Well lets start with a basic outline of the movie, beware of any spoilers.

Clearly from the poster it is a comedy, based around the rival of two brothers trying to get on up on the other. The movie really gets into things when the older brother and his friend attempt to steal the younger brothers computer to put some virus on it and there for slowing it up ( baring in the mind the young of the two is a supposed computer wiz)

However the only way they can get him away from his computer is to lure him away by telling him about this horrific (made up) movie they want to find on the internet but cant find. This movie being Movie 43.

From here the younger brother falls for the trap and starts searching the internet on the older brothers computer for said Movie 43. In doing this he finds lots of clips that claim to be Movie 43 but are not quiet what he is looking for.

The audience watching the clips that he finds are what make up the rest of the movie.

Are you still with me ?

Right so thees ensemble cast movies has been a big hit in the last couple of years such as 'Valentines Day' and 'New Years Eve', and if I'm honest i really enjoy them. I don't know about everyone else but i just love the thrill of seeing all the big names working together in one film, and this one is not short of big names.

From Halle Berry, to Hugh Jackman.

Kate Winslet and Richard Gere...

of all people i did not expect to see Richard Gere in this.

The clips are what really keep your interest in this film, the main story with the brothers is okay but that is just it, it's okay. Not something that would hold your attention for 1hr and a half.

I think what i enjoyed most about the clips section of the film was not just that they was funny but it was some seriously outrageous humor. No holding back from this one. It is just ludicrous and for all of you with a a twisted sense of humor like me, this is defiantly one for you.

However this is one that im glad i didnt see in the cinema's. Yes it is funny but i do feel at times that the storys between the brothers was forced just to give them a reason to get all the big name actors in the film. I think a lot more time could have been take on the script to create a much better reason to show all the clips and scetches. Or maybe thats's just me being a bit snotty and i have to take what the film is, a ludicrous film with a ludicrous story line.

Over all i would recommend this film as a must watch at least one.

A second watch might leave you feeling a bit lack luster as a lot of the humor comes from the surprise and shock.

***

Leave me a comment and let me know what you thought of Movie 43

Ireland days...2

2013-08-15T08:09:00.000-07:00

Im back!

Back from the land of potato and Guinness.

Okay maybe that's a bit stereotypical but to be fair i did eat a lot of potato whilst i was there and i had a couple of pints of Guinness, so its an honest observation.

So i bet your desperate to see some pictures...

and even if your not here are some anyway.

The views from my bedroom and where i was staying

Me at the beach in Newcastle ( Irish Newcastle)

Castle in Belfast

Harlem and Wolf ( cranes that built the titanic)

It was a truly beautiful and amazing trip and i met some amazing people.

I don't think it will be too long before i'll be back.

I did so much for one week that the days kind of blurred together.

I did do somethings i promise.

Like swimming at Warren point, baking a cake

(if you are aware of my lack of cooking skills you would find this impressive)

Going to a gig...

and getting lots of rest, just what i needed :)

Holi One

2013-08-04T07:52:00.002-07:00

Well wasn't i a lucky devil.

Only went and won tickets to the Holi one event in London

Battersea Power Station to be exact.

For all of you who don't know what Holi One is...

Let me show you...

As you could probably tell it's an amazing colour festival, supporting equality for everyone.

We mainly just went for the colours and music :P

Honestly though if you get the chance please do go.

We loved it so much were going again when it goes to Portsmouth.

Its worldwide, so ill link their website below and see if they are coming to your city.

Much love

http://www.holione.com/

https://www.facebook.com/LondonHOLIONE

Not all pictures belong to me :)

Ireland days

2013-07-29T03:05:00.001-07:00

Hello my lovely's

I've been really struggling with things to blog about of recent.

Feeling like i haven't really got a lot of interesting stuff to say.

But then alas !

i remembered...

I've only gone and brought myself some tickets to Ireland.

WAAHHOOO

I simply cannot wait to go, i leave at the beginning of august to stay for a week

( i would stay longer but i'm going to be staying with a friend and anymore more time then that might drive her crazy )

I've always wanted to go to Ireland

It looks like such beautiful country.

...And i love the accent

It was my mission this year to make a trip to Ireland, but i honestly didn't think it would happen.

Little things getting in the way and such, but i bit the bullet and just booked some tickets.

I'm going to be making this little adventure on my own.

Big step for me if i'm honest.

I've always prided my self of being a very independent person but actually when i really think about it, i'm far less independent then i think.

So this trip, even though i'm staying with a friend, is going to be one hell of a big step for me.

Especially since i'm going to uni in September it think its really important for to start doing things completely on my own and use it as a personal growth experience.

It's healthy really

Maybe my next step will be to take a trip completely on my own.

Not go and stay with a friend, but get to a country by myself and enjoy learning who i am.

HMMM sounds like a plan

It's good to challenge yourself, find out what your really made of

When was the last time you challenged yourself?

It doesn't have to be anything as big as a trip by yourself,

but something that pushes your comfort zone just that little bit.

They do say 'do one thing every day that scares you'

Embarrassing moment -2

2013-07-12T08:18:00.001-07:00

Well my muffins, you've got two blogs in one day. The only reason is because, its that time again. Embarrassing moment time. Urgh...

Now this literally just happened to me.

Right ill try to create a mental picture

for you.

So im in Primark, minding my own business. Mentally spending the money thats burning a whole in my pocket, when a girl starts shouting in my direction ' excuse me, excuse me' her head bobbing over the clothing towers as she makes her way towards me.

Oh god, she thinks i work here. What do i do? So my first reaction is defensive mode

'Excuse me...can you tell me ...'

And before have the time to take in fully what shes saying to me i respond (in a rather snappy manner)

"I dont work here "

It takes a second, but i then register what she actually said to me

" can you tell me... The time "

I look like a moron, All the poor girl wants to know is the time and ive given her my occupational status. Cue confused look across her face and my mother thankfully giving her the time whilst i do the walk of shame.

Oh dear.

Mobile blogger

2013-07-12T05:25:00.001-07:00

I have my blog back on my phone !!

So handy, any thoughts i have can come straight to you as i think them :p

Although, lets be honest.

Im pretty flaky.

All i can say is ill try and be more consistent.

Plus there is a lack of editing on here.

So all my simple blogs will have come from my phone.

Speaking of phones, i got a pretty new phone case the other day. It makes me soo happy :)

Much love

21

2013-07-11T07:22:00.004-07:00

Hello there my lovely

Well its been 2 weeks since in turned the grand age of

Let me tell you I had the best birthday.

A blog post on what i did is to follow and for all you Disney lovers out there it will be worth the read.

But for today's post I wanted to write something a little different

So with out further adieu

Here are 21 lessons i have learnt and some advise for my past self.

You are going to change, it maybe be a little or a lot.
You may change one a year or once a day.
Change is progress

And its okay

Do it now !
That little thing your putting off... the sooner you do it,

the happier you'll be

Learn to enjoy spending time with yourself.
Your the only person you'r going to spend forever with,
so you might as well enjoy your company.

Dont give your heart away too freely...

However
no matter how cautious you are with your heart you will probably get burned.

It happens to most of us,
your not alone

You will loose friends.
Its the sad truth, you wont remain friends with everyone.
Even the ones that you thought you were super close to may leave your life
All i can say is be thankful for the time they were with you,
They came into your life for a reason.
And the ones that really matter stick around

Treat others as you wish to be treated but..
don't be surprised if they don't do the same for you

Start taking care of your skin asap ( its never too early)

People make mistakes, including you !
No body is perfect !
learn to forgive them and yourself.
( and if you really want to aim for perfect, aim to be the best version of yourself)

10:

If you lack confidence - fake it

11:

Find the fun in everything, makes life a lot more interesting

12:

Its okay to not have it all worked out, as scary as it is.

I'm still learning this but i know its truth.

13:
You cant please everyone not matter how much you try.
This goes hand in hand with, not everyone will like you and it sucks !!

14:
Travel !

15:
Dont be afraid to say no. Its your life and you deserve to live it how you choose.
Not how others want you to live

16:
Experiment with your look

17:
Not everything is always black and white... there are shades of gray
Maybe not 50 of them :P

18:
Don't wash your hair every day,
please stop this habit !
A girls best friend = dry shampoo

19:
Sleep on it.
I've heard this said so many times but i have learnt its true.
Things always seem a little clearer after a good sleep

20:
Take the time every now and then to pamper yourself.
Your body will thank you for it

and last but not least
21:
A wise women once told me
'Don't sweat the small stuff, and everything is small stuff'
I try to remember this every time im worried.
Nothing ever turns out how you imagine it so
chill out :)

This took me so long to write as there's so much i have learnt in 21 years ( like walking for example :P )
I didn't know what to put and what not to put, so who know's we may see an extended edition of this.

Much love
X

Make the change in you're life

2013-07-04T04:09:00.001-07:00

Get ready for some inspirational words my little bloglets

You are worth ~~something~~, scratch that, you are worth a lot.

More then you probably think.

You do not deserve to be treated like dirt !

This is a lesson that i have had to learn this week.

Ive had to learn that at the end of the day Happiness is far more important then money.

This is something i should have already known,

alas, at least i know now.

When your miserable.

When your being treat like a substandard version of a human being.

When you dread the day.

Its time for a change.

IT IS TIME.

I feel like maybe i was treated like this, to be honest, allowed my self to be treated like rubbish, so that i could help others.

So that i could tell them how i would never allow myself to be this unhappy again

and that maybe someone would read this, who feels just as awful as i have felt for the past year and think ' you know what, i want to be happy too ! and i am worth more then this crap that i put up with !!'

Go and chase you're dreams, i can't belive its taken me this long to realise it but i dont want to look back on my life and think, well wasnt that boring. Boring and miserable.
Now im not saying that if your not chasing you dreams you'r not happy but i just feel so empowered to do so at the moment that i want to encourage you all to do the same.
Even though its only been a couple of days since ive made this desison to chase my dreams and just do what makes me happy i have already noticed a vast improvement on my mood, my relationships with others, and strangly my bank balance and waist arnt taking as much of a hit because im just not feeling the need to crush my emotions away with food or to spend till it stops hurting.

My dreams may not be handed to me on a plate and i may have a long joyney till i get there doing all sort of different jobs and meeting so many different people
But i know this is the right path.
I can feel it.
When you know you know right ?

Ive only made this one desision
to move on
to value myself

I supose i have to thank the people in question.
They gave me the power to move on.
The push i finally needed.

I hope this is yours
xxxx

Embarassing moment 1

2013-06-06T04:45:00.003-07:00

This might become a bit of a thing, the embarassing moment series. You know since i have a lot of them why not type them up on the internet for your entertainment.

That way my shame becomes something you can breifly giggly at and hopefully it brighten your day just that little bit.

So lets get on with it. Now i dont know where you live in the world but here in England its not often that we get a but of sun, and as soon as we do everyone is wacking out the skirts and shorts embracing the sun glorious heat. So not to be left out of all the fuss, on my day off i decided, hay lets wack a bikini on, grab an ice lolly and sit in the garden.

'No ones going to see you in all your vulnerability' i thought... oh how wrong i was.
Just as i had settled down, half naked may i remind you, the bloody window cleaner comes storming through the back gate !!!

All women out there, no matter how body confident you are, you feel my pain. You dont want anyone to catch you in a bikini unless it's intentional. Or just on holiday. Either way wearing a bikini is just like sitting around in my bra and pants. So the window cleaner basically saw me in my bra and pants. Oh god.
It gets worse, did he turn away? nope.. was he just as embarrased as me ? yes ! so why Mr embarrased window cleaner, did you not turn away ??? urggh
In a last ditch attempt to save the situation i resorted to thinking the only thing i can do now it to pretend its not awkward and everything is fine. I am a body confident young women, i tell my self who see's no problem in the situation that has just arisen and im going to fix it with ....' can i get you a coffee'

Why god, why ?

Time for a change

2013-05-31T07:11:00.001-07:00

Well isnt this a nice change of scenery ? what change of scenery i hear you ask...
Well the back ground to my blog of course.

Thought it was time for a bit of change, and i like it. I feel like when you look at the new background it's uplifiting and has an inspirational vibe to it :)

So what am i going to chat about today ? hmmm
well change is a nice topic since its in the title, even though im pretty sure ive chatted about that before. But you cant not have a repeated conversation between old friends can you ? ooo look at us, old friends.

So what changes are happening in my life ? well there are quiet a few in terms of things that are actually happening like going to uni in spetember, leaving my jobs ect ect.
What i really want to talk about though is more of a change in me :)

If im honest im fed up. They always say you wont make a change untill you uncomfortable enough to do so, and by gosh i am uncomfortable. Time to start persuing all the things i really truley want. Well the time was a couple of years ago but its never too late to start. Yeah, remember that one. Its Never too late to start.

So instead of boring you with paragraphs on how i want to be a better person and change the world. Lets write a list ( cause lists are more interesting to read anyways) about how i want to change to make my life a little selfishly better :P

I want to start a new blog. Dont worrie, for the 5 of you out there who read my blog ( and im very greatfull for you 5)it dosnt mean ill be deleting this blog. I was just thinking about writing a blog thats more in touch with something spesific rather then just my rambleings :) i want to write a blog about the entertainment industry and my progress into acting since that is my great love. You should always write abiut what you love.
Getting fit, for thoose who know me dont laugh. Okay you can laugh but make it breif. I think this is the age old change that everone wants to make. You know how it goes, 'ill start my diet on the monday' and when sunday roles around your craming every last cream cake into your mouth as a sort of goodbye to treats ceremony and as soon as wednesday hits youve made a mistake with a chocolate hobnob and think 'fuck it ill start again next monday' and finish the packet. well ladies and gentleman not this time. This time its all about the balenced life style. Have a McDonalds with your friends here and there but also excersizing 5 times a week and loads of veggies thrown in. I know what your thinking 'she'll never do it' well your wrong my friend because ive been doing it for quiet a while know. Suck on the past Me !!
Acting ! as i said before its my first love and ive never really gone full force with it. Not anymore. I have been ging to audtions and really pushing for this. It something that i want, that i need to be honest. I can't do anything else, and i wont do anything else. If you want it, work for it! my new moto :)

And thats it for todays blog ladies and gents. Hope it wanst too long for you :) go forth and have wonderful days you little love bugs. sending you some cyber love right now, can you feel it ? hahah i bet you can ;) xxxxx

30th of May 2013

2013-05-30T15:08:00.000-07:00

Hello... been a while hasnt it :P

I am such a naughty blogger. I always have big gaos between my blogs..
the truth is i havnt really known what to blog about. Surley my blog should have a theme i hear myself asking myself ?
well i guess it does have a theme, ME :) and you cant spell theme with out me.

Oooo while i remember im in this competition and it would really mean a lot to me if you would go and vote, it litterally only takes 2 seconds.
Heres the link
http://www.colgate.co.uk/app/ColgateOralCare/Toothpaste/MaxWhiteOne/UK/EN/Promotion/PhotoShoot/Bio.cwsp#!USER_DDB83BA024CF28D5E04379500A0ADB20

Thank you beautiful love bugs :)
im going to make this a short but sweet blog today since i havnt blogged in a while i have a lot to say so im not going to spew all my thoughts out now or there would be farrrrr too much to read and i would'nt want to assult all your beautiful eyes :D
ill just leave you with an inspirational quote and a few funny pictures in a hopes that it brightens up your day.
Lots of love being sent your way strangers of the world

On the other side of fear, lies freedom.

The 15th of March 2013

2013-04-14T16:26:00.001-07:00

hmmmm... i think i may have made a silly desision.

Ive always been really bad at academics. Ever since Primary school, i couldnt consetrate, to be honest i didnt want to consentate.

So this year, dispite all that ive desided to go to university. Really Me?! is that a good desision ? oh dear.
Panick panick panick.

Not sure what im going about this.
If i dont go to university though i honestly dont know what im going to do with my life. I dont know what i love, what my passion is. Am I the only one who feels like this ?

Hmmmm, ill deffinatly be back with more blogs on this subject. OOOoooo that might be a good little blog idea, finding my passion blogs. Blogs of me trying new things out !!
Go me with my ideas. shhh no one likes a big head :P

Anyways freak out over, thank you for coaching me through that, one of my many life crisis's

Lets end the blog on a happy note :)

Oh Barney, you're so right

19th of March 2013

2013-03-19T09:47:00.002-07:00

Lovley Days, ironicly, i love them :)

Let me tell you, yesterday was a lovley day.
Ever had a time in your life where you experianced pure happieness. Just bliss. Then one day the magics over and your just living life again. Everthings alright but its not quiet that bliss that you once had. Well thats kinda how i feel my life is at the moment. Then yesterday god took pity on me and sprinkled a bit of magic on me. College days were the best days of my life (...so far, i hope) The main reason was because of the people. Amazing people that no only understood my weirdness but encouraged it.

Leaveing college was awful. I no longer saw thoose people everyday, i no longer laughed everyday. My creativity was stiffled and i havnt felt that happy in a long while. Till yesterday, and all it took was a trip out with 2 of my great friends. I had met up with two of my amazing college friends for a wonder about town and a qucik snack at McDonalds. Let me tell you it was heaven. Going back and making all the old jokes we used to make spending time together and just laughing whilst being our own brand of weird. Now it wasnt quiet the same because it was only the 3 of use but hay i still got a chance to walk back down memorie lane. Sometimes its okay to look back to the past and reminis i think. As long as you dont dwell there too long :)

Mmmmm what a wonderful day i had, and yet so simple.

12th of March 2013

2013-03-12T07:54:00.000-07:00

Inspirational quote for the day :

“We learn something from everyone who passes through our lives.. Some lessons are painful, some are painless.. but, all are priceless.” - Unknown

Dont you just love a good inspirational quote to get you through the day. Well i sure do.

The only misfortune with leaving it so long between blogs is that you forget what youve already written about... oh the doubt.
Meh well never mind, lets discuss... boredom.

Ever been bored? i sure have. Probably explains the different fonts im using now. But have you ever though about what a luxury it is to be bored? Well... have you ?
we come from a society where boredom is a well excepted stae of mind ( and it is a state of mind)

The dictionary discribes boredom as : an emotional state experienced during periods of lack of activities or when individuals are uninterested in the activities surrounding them.

Lack of activitys ! how lucky we are to be able to live in a society where we can go through a day with a lack of activitys. We can have days where all our brain has to think about is 'remember to breath, no seriously at least do that today brain' Take a moment to appreciate that.
Ill wait...

We have so many options avalible to us in this age which wernt avalible even 50 years ago. Heck in some countrys they still dont have much freedom, let alone the freedom of boredom....

Anyways you get the idea... enjoy your boredom because there may come a day when boredom is all you want. Belive me that day will come.

In other news i brought a new handbag and its brown, covered in studs and its wonderful :D

26th of October 2012

2012-10-26T11:50:00.001-07:00

Well when your mother has to spend the night in hospital because of a suspected stroke dosnt that just change your whole out look on life.

Luckly after a Ct scan an MRI and an ultra sound on her neck it seems that a stroke has been ruled out... but the scary thing is, they dont have a clue whats wrong with her. She had symptoms of a stroke, slurred speach, heavy / numb arm and mouth and the scans showed scaring on the brain...phew didnt realise i wasnt over it yet. It has only been a week since it happened, i dunno. Sounds cheesey but when something threatens your world you go into high stress mode and even writing about it, is more difficult then i thought it would be. I could'nt be with out my mum and I'm sure many of you feel the same. I defiantly feel like a different person, i dont want to waste my life, i dont want my mum to take everything on. Time for me to step up really.Anyways her next appointment at the hospital is due soon, not sure what it for as they didnt say, in fact we had to get in contact with them even though we were promised a letter and what not ....okay off subject, im just really hoping they can tell us whats wrong cause something defiantly aint right.

9th of October 2012

2012-10-09T04:30:00.003-07:00

Well for the second time in a row here comes a slightly different blog today.
More of a review.
Well the other day me and my lovely other half went to the cinema ( origonally to see sinister) but we ended up seeing Looper.
I was actually pretty pleased as i wanted to see that for a while. The main 2 actors in the film are Joseph Gorden-Levitt and Bruce willis, who can i say looks lot younger in this film then i have seem of him resently. They are both playing them same charecter just the past and future version. One thing I found strange about the film but did actually quiet enjoy was the fact that the past section of the film as set in 2044 which is obviosly in the futur so it was a nice take making the future basically the past. so with out giving to much away Gorden- levitts chatecter young Joe is an assinator of peope who are sent back from the future which is called being a Looper ( hense the name of the film) . With out giving too much away Loopers one day will be sent their future self to kill and will get a big pay off for doing so. Well you can imagine what it would be like if you were sent youself to kill and you knew it. You might struggel. So you can have a guess of how the film goes. Now there is a second storie line which comes into play in the film and this is where Emily Blunt come in, who I think plays a brilliant role and a truley beliveable charecter. I would say more about the second storie line but i feel that really would give too much away and ruin the film for you.
One thing that i did find dissapointing about the film was that I founs it to be a really predictable ending. Me and my other half both guessed it quiet quickly. However the storyline before, and acting from all actors far makes up for the predictable ending.
So overall i would deffinatly recomend this easy to follow film. If you like the style of films such as Inception, Shutter Island and In Time then you'll love this.

day in the life of a muffin (yeah you read right )

2012-10-07T14:47:00.000-07:00

Its been a short life, but a sweet one.
Today i was taken from the warmth of my life giver and placed in this amaxing new world. Its a lot colder here but theres a lot more to see. Already i have been dressed up in a pretty pink hat with flowers and sparkels on top. i think its for some grand ceromy im attedngin as i often hear talk of a party. I hope the party is for me. Ive been spending a lot of time with all the other muffins. They have been dressed up too. At first i thought we were all the same but the strange creature put different coloured hats on their heads and now i think they are what they call my brothers. Later ill be placed on what i think is called a table to sit and be pretty with a lot of other pretty things. I think we are in competiton with eachother to be the best looking so im going to make sure i look my best. I seem to smell pretty good to as the creatures keep walking past me, smelling me and then letting out a low humming noise. This must be a good sign.
I must be off i can hear a lot of noise coming from the frount of the building. People seem to be very excited. Oh look there are some smaller creatures coming this way. They seems to be very exicted, oo im being picked up , this is my time to shine i think im going to be taken to the judging table ...oh wait. What are they doing... they are putting me in their mouth ..oh no .. no ..noooooooooooo

Well that was a little depressing
Poor little muffin. Remember this story folks next time your eating freshly baked muffins
Haha hope you all enjoyed this little storie xxx