BloggingThat

Orange County Eco Mud Run - Part 1

2010-02-21T00:46:02Z

2010 Orange County Eco Mud Run

I have officially committed to participation in the 2010 Orange County, CA Eco Mud Run. I believe this is run 2 of 4 in the series, but I will be doing this one. My training regimen should adequately prepare me for the grueling course that will consist of hot California sunshine, mud, tunnels, obstacle course, cargo net crawls and walls to jump. I plan to train to the unique requirements of this race by, training on the treadmill, running on the beach and some obstacle course work. I will also commit to watching my diet. Time to run = 32 days.

This will be one of many posts in a series to document a champion and his endeavor, hardship and success, and a mighty support team. I have set some attainable goals in which to measure my success:

Achieve a body mass index (BMI) of between 18.5 - 24.9. Currently 25.62
Lose 5 pounds.
Finish the race.
Have fun.

Mike D.

Huntington Beach, CA Bans Beer Pong

2010-01-22T20:33:01Z

The city is to ban alcohol games for new businesses downtown or those renewing their entertainment licenses. “It’s an alcohol game that encourages excessive drinking,” said police Capt. Chuck Thomas. “We did not believe that type of game was in the best interest of the community.”

Photo CC by mattdell

I only pose one question. Will this prevent people from drinking excessively? Really?

Pardon Me, Sir Have You Seen My T-bag

2009-11-22T23:40:53Z

I was golfing two weeks ago in beautiful Southern California. We were standing by our carts waiting to tee off. No lie, a man walks up and asks us if we have seen his t-bag. I could barely contain my laughter. We all looked at each other to assess how funny the situation was. Then my outspoken friend told him it was on his nose. At first, I wanted to be respectful; I was raised better, but my humor got the best of me and my friends shared in my dilemma as we laughed loudly. The man, now realizing the alternative meaning to his question, and playing it back in his head as he looked slightly upward, was completely embarrassed, but laughing at himself.

Ten minutes later, after returning from the clubhouse, the man walked by again. Instantaneous flash-over!

-Mike D.

Have an Honorable Veterans Day

2009-11-22T23:48:33Z

Have an honorable Veterans Day.

Happy Independence Day!

2009-07-03T18:20:32Z

Be safe and enjoy your freedoms. Thank a member of the military, your local police, fire and public safety workers.

Lakers Beat the Magic

2009-06-15T06:13:16Z

…but Laker fans don’t know how to act. Seriously, calm the $%&* down.

Have an Honorable Memorial Day

2009-05-25T17:42:45Z

Please pay respect to the men and women who keep our great country free.

Vista is Great, Compared to Plague

2009-05-09T01:53:47Z

I do not like it in a box. I do not like it with a fox. I do not like it, that’s for shista. I do not like it Windows Vista.

Pirates Eliminated by Navy SEALS

2009-04-12T23:53:09Z

Navy SEALS cut down three pirates after a three-day stand-off with the U.S.-flagged ship Maersk Alabama. I love it when our military comes in to save the day for a good reason. This makes me proud!

Bums Suffer With New Technology

2009-04-03T23:07:02Z

I am concerned with the shopping cart wheel lock technology that prevents shopping carts from being removed from the parking lots. How will the bums haul their s***t around now?

Photo CC by Sights Set

Preschoolers Dictionary: Easter

2009-03-08T21:59:25Z

Main Entry: Eggin

Pronunciation: \’eg n\

Etymology: Middle English, from preschool, 21st century

1. (Verb) - To go on a search for hidden eggs normally associated with Easter.

“Dad, is it time to go eggin yet?”

Synonym - Easter egg hunt

Moose Humps Statue

2009-03-20T07:28:50Z

Legal Question:

Is this statue-tory rape???

Or is It just a moosedemeanor…..

Mask: You Are Remembered

2009-03-17T07:26:14Z

The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time. ~Mark Twain

Add Ice for Cold Drink

2009-03-14T06:40:59Z

The person who would not know this probably can not read.

How Not to Have a Hangover

2009-02-23T05:07:20Z

I drank some rum. Rum is good. Ask any pirate and he’ll tell you the same. However, pirates probably did not live in apartments. I do. This works out pretty well for my story.

Normally, I awake by an alarm set on my phone. It bothers me but is necessary to my career and ultimately, my survival. This was to be no normal morning.

I awake to the shrill sound of high-speed power tools grinding brick. Anyone who has had a hangover can vouch that this is pain. This is all going on below my window and I want to throw hot coffee on this person. It must be noted that I have no hot coffee, so I am screwed. Apparently the grinding was not enough and the job required a sledge hammer. Thud! Thud! Thud!, the ground shook and the very core of my brain hurt. How could anyone do this to me? I look at the clock and see it is 9:00 AM so they probably can. The apartment complex has a few guys that do it all and are equipped for maintenance. I think ” this is as bad as it’ll get”.

Wrong! DDDDDDT!, DDDDDT!, DDTTTTTT! They have a jack-hammer! Holy crap my head is dying. I am in disbelief and begin to dress myself because, I am evacuating! Could they have explosives? I can not take the chance. As I leave, many of my fellow residents are dispatching to their cars. Everyone is pissed and hauling ass. We all leave in a scramble.

I come back to a pretty good looking sidewalk, though I notice a few cracks on the other side.

My Effervescent Head

2009-02-23T03:55:34Z

I am a frequent flier within the United States. I mean I know the names of airline attendants, TSA, bartenders and all that. Sometimes when I fly I get sick. I am usually healthy, but a plane ride seems to do me in. A couple of people, including my lovely wife, told me to try Airborne before flying. This product was created by a second grade teacher. Why is that important? Well first, she probably doesn’t have to teach anymore if she doesn’t want to and second, it was designed as defense against snotty nosed [punk] kids. It is basically a vitamin pack created to boost your immune system before you travel or go in to large crowds or classrooms.

Enough background. I am at MCO, otherwise known as Orlando International Airport. I have a few bucks and a little time so I look through a shop because I’m bored. I see Airborne for the first time. The product is packaged in a plastic tube the size of a roll of quarters on a cardboard backing. I leave the store and quickly rip in to the package. I will be boarding in less than a half an hour now so I had better take this now. I pop the tamper-proof cap and a large, quarter inch thick, tablet falls in to my hand. It is supposed to taste of fruit so I smell it and it smells like fruit. I pop it in to my mouth.

Dude! I should have read the directions. This thing is effervescent like a danged alka-seltzer. As my saliva hit the tablet, a reaction began that may have made me look like a rabid dog. It was too late. I was already chewing it which made everything happen faster. I have all but lost my embarrassment through the years, specifically, when my five year old pulled my pants down in Home Depot and clung to my ankles, so I remain cool. And then I burped… A lot. The alphabet, War and Peace and a few nursery rhymes for good measure.

But, I didn’t get sick. So, was it worth it. I say yes! With all that said; this is a decent product that I would recommend. Just make sure you use it as it ws intended to be used.

Stim-usless Package

2009-02-22T01:41:05Z

I took a look at the latest stimulus package to see if it could help my family. What I found inspired my rant and a few suggestions for the future.

As it turns out, I have been fiscally responsible, unlike the banks, the government and people who bought homes they could never afford. So, I’m good. There is nothing for me here. Kinda like when I paid my way through college, unable to get a grant, though I was broke, underfed and without insurance. Oh well. <insert the tiniest violin here>

My heart goes out to those who have lost their jobs, have suffered health issues during times of relentless medical cost increases or are trying to retire. These folk truly need the help to get back on their feet or have a comfortable life. I should know as I am one of them (failed job) and currently work 2200 miles away from my family so that we can survive without a handout. Humans require food, clothing and shelter. Plasma screen TVs are not on the list people. Ya heard?

The banks and the automobile industry do not deserve a dime. Giving Federal money, which comes from our taxes, to the fiscally irresponsible (and/or corrupt) is not the way to stimulate the economy. Let them fail; then support fiscally responsible people who should take their place. Never in history has there been a time where so many CEO’s have screwed their employees out of their retirements while landing softly on the ground of their estate under the luft of their golden parachute. America hasn’t failed, it is merely weeding out the riffraff.

We do not need this much government assistance. We can do this ourselves. The more help we require from government, the more helpless we become. It has helped for me to stop watching the news. It is biased and mostly crap. Use the internet to find out whats really going on. The economy has seized because we think it is. If you weren’t told, you would just be spending like normal. Read the Constitution and get back to life. Do not let our freedom be diluted by the guise of terrorism. God bless you.

Magnitude 4.5 Earthquake Shakes LA

2009-01-09T17:58:11Z

I felt a 4.5 earthquake today. This is my first and I wasn’t sure, at first, if it was one but the room was shaking vertically and horizontally for 5-8 seconds. The epicenter was 54 miles away near the San Andreas Fault. An aftershock with a magnitude of about 3.3 occurred an hour later but I didn’t feel that.

Happy New Year 2009

2008-12-25T18:50:06Z

Here’s wishing you all the best of the new year!

Xmas Poo Visits Us Too

2008-12-30T04:56:07Z

At dinner. It’s funny to have toddlers, know what I mean?

Unalbe to show flash video

Top Five Things Flight Attendants Say

2008-12-30T04:15:38Z

5. Oh, I have ran out of cookies. They must have them up front.

4. Sir, it is impossible for two people to be assigned the same seat.

3. Sir, there was a blanket on every seat where is yours?

2. Flight attendants are not here for your comfort but for your safety. Chssht, Is there a doctor or any kind of medical assistant on board, maybe someone who used to watch Doogie Houser?

photo CC by hfabulous

1. In case of a sudden drop in cabin pressure a mask will drop from the ceiling. Please place the mask around your face and breath freely. Though the bag does not appear to inflate, oxygen is flowing if you have first swiped your credit card. Please put on your mask before swiping your card to purchase your childs air for the same price.

Bah, Bye, Now!

Happy Holidays from Bloggingthat

2008-12-25T18:51:34Z

Hope your holidays are great!

BloggingThat Thanks Europe

2008-12-25T18:44:58Z

I have had some time to look at some statistics of people who read this blog and I want to thank some folks. Thanks goes out to Halifax, Bath, Aalst, Mettmann, Manchester, Bochum, Morfelden, Prague, Ostrava, Maples and Casablanca.

Unalbe to show flash video

Bush Narrowly Evades Shoe Attack

2008-12-15T00:51:38Z

Unalbe to show flash video

An Iraqi news reporter throws his shoes at President Bush during a ceremony in Iraq stating “This is the end”. First off, I would like to say those are pretty good reflexes for an old man. Second, I believe that perhaps Barbara must throw shoes at him because he ducked the shoe too naturally, not unlike an athlete. Third, and maybe most importantly; where was the secret service? Sure the first shoe was a surprise, but someone was supposed to “take the bullet” on the second shoe. I should have seen a man diving in front of the podium in response to the second shoe with no regard for his own life.

To the Iraqi “shoeman”; what the heck, man? You must have grown up in the posh area of Iraq, not ever throwing a rock in your life. How could you miss? Twice! You are a disgrace to your recently liberated country. You are what we, in America, call an “easy out.” He did hit the American flag, so maybe we should let a Marine talk to him about honor. Just a thought.

That’s all I got to say about that.

-Mike

How Men Screw Up Romance

2008-12-14T23:36:01Z

Of course this is not the only way, mate.

Unalbe to show flash video

Chicken n’ Waffles, Bird n’ Batter

2008-12-04T08:23:01Z

I have always wanted to try chicken and waffles from Roscoe’s. Since I am in LA; I decided to give it a try. I wish I could say it was worth a Wingsday review.

I was first introduced to the bird and batter by Snoop Doggy Dogg on his show “The Dogg Father”. You see, Snoop tries to get at the chicken while his wife tries to make him stop eating greasy foods, but Snoops chubby assistants gets the chicken for Snoop. Well, the good news is, the chicken is not greasy and the waffles aren’t either.

I ordered the “Country Boy”, which is three, count’em, three chicken wings and one regular waffle [special batter, whatever]. This would be one damn skinny country boy! I ordered this because it was cheap at 8-9 dollars. They say happy cows come from California; I’m willing to bet the chickens are happy to be worth that much and how do you even put a price on batter. This meal had no substance. Sure, I could have ordered the whole chicken, but at what cost?

I’m sorry, but in my opinion, this restaurant is all hype. The irony is, the location I visited is built right next to a Kentucky fried chicken. I can’t decide which place is worse.

Dissi’n on the chicken,

Mike - Out

Los Angeles has the Best Chinese Food

2008-12-14T22:38:07Z

Los Angeles has the best Chinese food. The Chinese have gathered in China Town [naturally] which is near where I work in West LA. The food is as authentic as if you were in China only better. How, you ask? Ancient Chinese secret. The restaurants prepare food that is specific to different parts of China; North China, South China, Canton and so forth. The service is great, the portions are satisfying and the meal comes with tea, soup, rice and main dish for $4.75. I’m stuffed by the time I leave and including a tip, I’m out the door for less than a super-size value whatever. The difference is, the food is healthy. Lean meat and plenty of vegetables and anti-oxidants in the tea insure a longer life than a fatty burger, but I love that too. I also love the bean sauce or salty beans. It is like Chinese ketchup. So, if your in LA, stop your rickshaw at a restaurant on the streets from Atlantic to Garfield off the 10 and treat yourself to some fresh, authentic Chinese food. But be warned; you will never want to eat Chinese food from the mall again. -Mike

Obama Please Do Good

2008-11-08T05:33:22Z

We are all tired of the weak market, high gas prices and thinking government should be doing a better job. My family and the world are counting on you to make things better. It is not hard to look good when you follow a complete moron, but please try as hard as you can for your entire term. “The First Black American President”, I didn’t know that would happen in my generation, but I’m glad it did. I am proud of you. You are well spoken and present yourself as an intelligent American, a sharp contrast to your predecessor.

In the past year, I have done things to support my family that include me not seeing them for extended periods of time. I have not been pleased that this may be happening as a result of the inappropriate actions of failed leadership. The president used presidential power to over-ride the normal checks and balances to get what he wanted. He used fear tactics to scare the American people into believing terrorists are all around us and blatantly lied about weapons of mass destruction. There are clear ties to the war, oil and profit for these corrupt politicians. I also do not think the timing of this market crash is a coincidence. As we gain new leadership the deals of the corrupt will be broken. If we only knew the truth.

So, after a visious campaign, you are victorious and moving your things in to the white house. Please do not forget how you made it there and “keep it real”. You have a great opportunity to go down as one of the great presidents in history as opposed to a president, who will be viewed by all who study history, as a dipshit. I actually felt happier when Obama became president elect than when the Saddam Hussein statue was pulled down. In my mind; the Bush statue toppled.

This is the last of the political series. It’s not my thing, but I felt I had to use my blog to reach some people.

Peace

Family Wisdom

2008-10-23T06:20:47Z

My Grandmother [d], in my opinion, was set in her ways. She was firm and not changing anything. I’ll give an example. Her coffee pot was a percolator type, real old school. We, meaning my parents and us kids, would always offer to buy her the latest coffee pot with all of the features, but she liked hers just fine. I perceived this as stubborn or maybe being older you get set in your ways. Why not get the coffee pot with the timer and twelve cups and all that.

At one point in my life, my relationship with my girlfriend was caustic. I asked my Grandmother what she thought about the situation. She said, “Well, get an new one.”

At first I thought this is the woman who has percolated coffee since the 1900’s, sits on a *davenport, and made **bathtubs full of chili (unconfirmed). It sounded simple enough. It was reasonable. I took the advice and now I have an amazing family who excels at being wonderful. I shutter to think of the now if I had not.

Years later, today, right now, it just hit me like a ton of anything. She did not keep her coffee pot because she was old or inflexible or unwilling to change. She kept it because it worked for her, flawlessly, with no problems. I just needed this to remember the strong foundation that my family was built on.

Who is the foundation of your family? How have they forged who you are today?

*”Davenport” has become a genericized trademark like “Kleenex” or “Band-Aid.” It is often used as a synonym for “sofa”, especially in the Midwestern United States.

**The dream is alive. I’m thinking about doing this, possibly to feed the homeless of Los Angeles.

When You Are a Little Dog

2008-10-16T04:58:46Z

Walk in the footprints of the big dogs…

Presidential Debate 10/07/08

2008-10-08T06:34:04Z

I love Tom Brokaw
Obama’s Grandma was “scrimpi’n
McCain is at the tiller, steering a small boat
Possible irony… Obama kills Osama

Later

BTW, do NOT look at your 401K. Just place that envelope in a drawer somewhere.

Vice Presidential Debate 2008

2008-10-07T03:09:31Z

Mc Cain depicted as a “maverick”. We already have a cowboy in the White House. Do you really want a maverick? And which iteration of maverick do we get?

mav-rik, [mav-er-ik,

–noun

1.	Southwestern U.S. an unbranded calf, cow, or steer, esp. an unbranded calf that is separated from its mother.

2.	a lone dissenter, as an intellectual, an artist, or a politician, who takes an independent stand apart from his or her associates.

3.	(initial capital letter) an electro-optically guided U.S. air-to-ground tactical missile for destroying tanks and other hardened targets at ranges up to 15 mi. (24 km)

I’m gonna guess 3 and vote NO.

Eating Kangaroo Saves Global Warming

2008-10-02T05:19:12Z

According to this article from Yahoo, eating kangaroo could cut global warming because the kangaroo fart less than cattle and sheep. Or, more politely stated, ” Kangaroos, on the other hand, emit negligible amounts of methane gas.”

This gives a new meaning to the words “hot pocket”.

My First Magnitude 3.0 Earthquake

2008-12-04T05:26:10Z

I just read that a magnitude 3.0 earthquake happened at 7:57 Pacific time while I was talking to my wife. I didn’t feel it. I am about 16 miles away and the event occurred 8.4 miles beneath the Earths surface . As I recently learned after moving to SoCal, earthquakes happen about a dozen times a day. The faults are really active here. It’s that whole ring of fire thing.

So, I have something to watch now besides hurricanes and tornadoes.

Griffith Park Observatory

2008-09-28T23:59:04Z

Griffith Park Observatory is on the South slope of Mount Hollywood. The visionary dream of Griffith J. Griffith, made the Griffith Observatory possible. “Man’s sense of values ought to be revised. If all mankind could look through that telescope, it would change the world!” , Griffith said. His original plans would include a telescope for all to see, a hall of science and a motion picture theater. The observatory comes with a great history. As you arrive, you are greeted by the likes of Copernicus and a real sundial that was accurate enough to let me know when the observatory would open.

For those of you who need proof that the Earth is rotating, there is a Foucault Pendulum which hangs from a domed roof that is beautifully adorned with paintings of philosophers and scientists. Look up.

During the day, a coelostat can be viewed from three locations. This is used to look at the sun without burning your eyes out. The picture on the left is the dome that houses the coelostat.

There is a dome identical to this on the other side of the building that houses the 12-inch Zeiss refracting telescope. this telescope can be viewed during the day, but they only use it at night for obvious reasons. Should you find yourself unable to climb the stairs to either scope, CCTV is provided.

There are two levels underneath the observatory that have been a recent addition. There you can view scale models of the planets (even Pluto) and find out how much you weigh on each, see meteors and discover the solar system. A seismograph, used to measure earthquakes, is on display for you to play with.

I will intentionally leave out a few things that you will have to see for yourself. The park is free and offers a great view of Los Angeles. There is also hiking, biking and pets are welcome in some areas. The Griffith Park Observatory is an excellent place to spend the day in Los Angeles.

Presidential Debate 09/26/08

2008-09-27T04:08:10Z

In this debate; I think that McCain highlighted that he has the same narrow thinking as President Bush. McCain seems to be looking for answers to correct past problems while Obama recognizes the mistakes of this administration and is prepared to correct them or at least not go down the same road again while looking forward to prevent such irresponsible mistakes.

The Bush administration has become so encapsulated in terror and war that they have left everything else by the wayside. We see this in the present state of the economy. McCain defends the bad decisions that have been made, because he was there making them, and even tried pulling heart strings to make a point. Look, we all appreciate the soldiers. They do their job. Nobody wants to see them used unnecessarily. It seems McCain will plow forward with backward thinking. McCain is focused on the same policies that encourage terrorism. When we invade other countries, they hate us. Put yourself in their shoes. McCain is prepared to ignore country leaders who are developing nukes, and generally put Americans in “survival mode” when we could be freaking happy.

Obama seems to have a broader scope of the situation, realizing there is more than one front for the American people to be concerned with. Though we need to deal with Iraq and terrorism, the suffering economy and natural disasters as they unfold, there are other things that concern the American people that are currently being ignored. I think Obama said it best when he described how children from other countries perceive the United States of America. It should be the great place in which everyone has a chance to be great. Obamas words encourage me as I think about the future for my children and me. I have never been encouraged by the mumbling, bumbling Bush.

So, if you are a hard core republican, just look back at the past eight years and ask yourself if you are better off today than you were when you were bitching about Clinton. Because, I’d rather have a president that’s getting a little on the side than a war monger. We have been at war the entire time Bush has been president and the cost of that dwarfs the economic mortgage bank crisis we are in now. Wake up People!

Obie Has Passed On

2008-09-26T20:56:30Z

I regret to say Obie has passed on. The cause of death, dental floss.

We’ll miss you.

Guess Who Said This?

2008-09-26T04:55:01Z

“In an economic recession, I’d rather that in order to get out of this recession, that the people be spending their money, not the government trying to figure out how to spend the people’s money.”

Obie the Cat is in Critical Condition

2008-09-26T03:13:38Z

Obie the cat is in bad shape. He is a good cat but he has lately been lethargic, lost about five pounds and generally down. There has been evidence of great illness and so today we made the decision to…

help him. He is in intensive care on an IV and pain meds. If he makes it through the night, he will undergo exploratory surgery to clear an obstruction in his bowels, they think. He ate something that cats aren’t supposed to eat.

News media crowded the vets office in an attempt to get the scoop regarding legal action taken by Lucas for the patented Star Wars name. As Obie rested, he was quoted as saying, “Meow.” On wall street, as the news of Obie’s illness hit the wire, oil went up $2.00 a barrel.

God speed Obie.

Bail Out Package

2008-09-23T06:21:40Z

It sounds so neat and clean. Like it comes in a pretty little shrink wrapped package.

Where the hell is my bail out package? When ever I screw up; I bail myself out or suffer until I can crawl back up to the surface. My business fails, it just fails. I lose my job, i’m broke.

Banks suckered stupid people in to outrageous home loan terms that they could never afford or pay off, then the banks whine that they are losing money on TOXIC loans and the market crashes, oh my @#&&* hurts.

Fortunately Hopefully, this is the last thing BurscK can screw up before he’s out of office.

Oh, but while America can only react to one thing at a time, people can’t get gas in the South and Texas is kinda messed up. More government oversight, I think not. Not even going to touch on the things that matter like education and starving people. That wouldn’t look good in the face of seven years of war. Damn it.

ps. The only thing that should have EVER been bailed out is my brothers boat. That WAS necessary.

I Got So Busy, I Forgot to Say

2008-09-16T03:49:29Z

I received my first Google Adsense check for $100. When I do the math, it kinda pays for this literary social experiment, however, the time I spent was fairly enormous. Now that i’m past the learning curve; let’s look at my sweet retirement plan. Let’s just say 20 years to retirement. I’d better get a job.

Later

Damn Disrespectful Bastards

2008-09-16T04:08:35Z

I know that is a terrible way to begin a post, but i’m pissed (PG-13 in effect). This is Santa Montica Beach in California. The crosses in the sand are made to look like Arlington, VA cemetery.

To walk through this is just a disgrace. Or a statement… Either way, to me, despicable.

Edit: But doesn’t that grey tube look like a weapon from a first person player game like Duke Nuk’m poised to hurl a ball of fire at them? Okay, whatever.

BloggingThat Goes LA, California That Is

2008-09-16T03:53:15Z

Swimming pools… movie stars… traffic… graffiti… Does everyone carry spray paint with them? My car has to stick out like Jethro with my out of state tags. I drove through the Mojave desert to get here. On the way, I saw the roadrunner and the coyote. Don’t believe me? All ye of little faith.

Meep, Meep! Plublublub! Phuuuume!

The Dude Abides

2008-08-15T02:49:28Z

Isn’t that comforting?

The Big Lebowski: Are you employed, sir?

The Dude: Employed?
The Big Lebowski: You don’t go out looking for a job dressed like that? On a weekday?
The Dude: Is this a… what day is this?
The Big Lebowski: Well, I do work sir, so if you don’t mind…

The Dude: I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man.

——————————————————-

The Big Lebowski: What makes a man, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: Dude.
The Big Lebowski: Huh?
The Dude: Uhh… I don’t know sir.
The Big Lebowski: Is it being prepared to do the right thing, whatever the cost? Isn’t that what makes a man?
The Dude: Hmmm… Sure, that and a pair of testicles.

Photo CC by greefus groinks

Redneck Tanktop

2008-08-14T02:18:13Z

This was taken in front of the Gardendale, Alabama, Walmart while she was going to the Flea market.

Please look carefully at this photo.

Notice that it is a pair of men’s briefs. That is just darned creative. What gave it away for me was the upside down Hanes on the waistband.

I don’t really know what to say other than, wow.

Blogging That

Love That Bernie Mac

2008-08-10T03:30:50Z

Love you, brother.

Cell Phones With Airbags

2008-08-10T03:15:38Z

So, I’ve been dropping my cell phone a lot lately and I thought it might be handy to have CIS or cellular impact restraints. Kinda like airbags for cell phones. Well, that’s just crazy, but what if the outside of the phone was made out of bouncy balls? What do you think?

Photo CC by jeff kubina

Blogging That

Windows Vista is Cool Cause it Looks Like Linux

2008-08-10T00:49:31Z

My wife’s mother bought her a brand new PC. That was swell of her. It came loaded with Vista, which I had not experienced, nor had I heard many good things about. Nobody likes change as it relates to something they need to be consistant. I did spend many hours trying to adapt to operating systems in the past, and just when you get everything stable, there is a new one. I kind of like it because it looks more like Linux, which I have used for a few years in my study of data recovery and other bit-level activity (read I am a geek).

The coolness quickly wears off when you realize that your existing software isn’t compatible and you have no real software budget. The new graphics of old minesweeper do not make up for the ability to balance your checkbook. Well, that’s life, so we’ll adapt to Vista just in time for the launch of Andreas. That is my prediction of the name for Microsoft’s new OS. San Andreas FAULT… get it?

Blogging That

I Have Rented So Many Cars Lately

2008-07-31T00:53:02Z

That, when I walk in to a parking lot, I have to think hard about what I am driving today. Make, model, color, i’m reaching for the alarm button to hit panic to see which car goes off. The good news is; I could blog about car reviews or something. I love my Scion.

I Didn’t Know You Could Control Alt Delete a Passenger Jet

2008-07-30T23:46:53Z

I shuffled on to the Airbus A320 jet airliner like any other day. No rain delays, no pilot delays, no mechanical issues, oh, wait there was just one mechanical issue.

Capt from the cockpit: Chssht, we had a minor issue when starting the left jet engine. Uhh, a trouble light came on at startup and, uhh, we are in contact with maintenance to see if we are going to restart the engine or taxi back to the gate and off load. Chssht.

Me: The left engine is bad? Don’t we need them both? I hope the guy who is making the call got plenty of rest, woke up on the right side of the bed and his dog brought him his slippers so he could enjoy his morning coffee.

For the next five minutes, the sound of the engines being shut down were heard. Then five minutes later, the engines screamed with life again.

Capt from the cockpit: Chssht. Uhh, as you may have heard, we shut down the engines for a restart. Ground maintenance advised the doohickey thingamabob sensor set a trouble condition in the systems computer. Chssht.

-five second pause-

Capt from the cockpit: Chssht. Flight attendants prepare the cabin for takeoff. Chssht.

Me: They just did a Control+Alt+Del on the plane. Does the trouble ticket say NTF (no trouble found)? How will we reboot in flight? Did I leave my iron on?

Photo CC by caribb

We Don’t Need No Stinking Email Address

2008-07-20T13:35:18Z

One of my blog readers, possibly my only blog reader Gabby, has brought something to my attention. She suggested in a previous post that more people would comment if an email address was not required. I have no need for your email addresses and I don’t want you to have to slip on your morals by fibbing just to make a comment here, so no email address is required to comment here. By the way, you can contact Gabby, for blog consulting, at sorryihateleavingmyemailaddy@hotmail.com

Thanks for reading!!

It’s Too Early For Coffee

2008-07-18T11:14:13Z

So, I’m at the airport in DC. It’s 5:00 AM and I am getting coffee. I pour the coffee and tear the top off of a small half and half container and dump it in to the coffee and throw away the container and repeat. The third time, I ripped the top off the container, skipped the pour it in the coffee step, and threw the full container in the trash. The lady behind the counter and I had a good laugh.

The 4th of July is Independence Day

2008-07-04T12:42:04Z

Happy Independence Day everybody. Have a safe weekend.

[Photo CC by D4rr3ll]

BloggingThat Goes Green

2008-07-01T17:33:15Z

A lot of people are going green these days and BloggingThat is not about to be left behind. As our carbon based natural resources go up in smoke, so do the bank accounts of the oil companies. This is what is called the “footprint” people. So, what size shoe are you wearing?

This is a sneek peek, behind the scenes, look at BloggingThat. It is simple really; I run off of bio-fuel. I like corn and other grains too. Beer is made from grain and so this is how I power up my blog. Maybe this explains some of my posts.

Anyhow, this is a green blog. So, when you read it, you are effectively reducing your carbon based footprint while surfing the internet.

Thanks for reading BloggingThat.

[Photo CC by John Hoover]

Water on Mars, We Got It!

2008-06-27T19:45:58Z

And they said it couldn’t be done.

Unbelievable Crashes

2008-06-21T21:29:49Z

I don’t know why I do this before I fly or SCUBA dive. I freak myself out a little.

Godaddy Server Move RSS Test - Take 1

2008-07-23T22:20:06Z

Godaddy moved my server, while I was moving RSS. Ouch! A heads up would be nice.

How to Bury a Garden Hose

2008-06-19T21:59:25Z

Have you ever tuned on the water hose full-blast and just stuck it in to the ground, the water blasting the dirt and sand in every direction, welcoming the hose to enter the underdirt? <Begin Mischievous Echo> Never to be recovered.</End Mischievous Echo> When I was young, I did this a lot and it was exciting to think that I could water China. While I’m still not convinced it can not be done, I do appreciate the cost of a garden hose. Because, I know, you can never get it back. My kids were adamant about pulling the hose from the ground. First, they asked me to pull it out of the ground. I did give it a tug and at the same time noticed the water was still on. “What a stretchy hose”, I thought. Then, my wife chimed in, “I need that hose.” “Well, honey, then you shouldn’t have let the children bury it, it’s gone now.”, I replied. “They didn’t do it, I did.”, she remarked. Pause [Wild laughter ensues] I wonder if the children, or wives, in China are trying to “hose” to the United States. I’ll be waiting, I could use a new nozzle.

10 Things You Shouldn’t Do While Driving

2008-06-12T21:32:21Z

Drink alcohol
Sleep
Change your pants
Confess to wife or girlfriend
Eat tacos
Text message
Juggle
Sneeze
Ahem, you know*
Pick buggers**

*This is a PG rated blog, please.

**Unless windows are tinted by a minimum of 85%

Credit Card Minimum Purchase is Wrong

2008-06-12T18:31:36Z

Have you ever walked in to a convenience store to buy a drink, gum or other low cost item and use a credit card to pay for it? Have you ever been fed a ration of crap regarding a minimum purchase? A sob story of how expensive it is to process, blah, blah, blah. If you are saying my money is no good here, then i’ll take my business elsewhere. No, not only for gum…gas too. Why?, because it’s wrong.

Many stores display signs of their required minimum purchase, others charge an extra fee to process payment. According to an article from msnbc stores cannot set credit card minimum. “Merchants accepting Visa or MasterCard credit or debit cards are not allowed to set a minimum amount for using the card; that is a violation of the merchant agreement.”

Here it is from the faq straight from Visa. ”

Can merchants set a minimum purchase or charge a fee for using my Visa card?
Visa has certain regulations that all merchants that accept Visa cards must follow. One of those rules is that Visa merchants are not permitted to establish minimum transaction amounts, even on sale items.

If you run into a problem like this with a merchant, please notify your Visa card-issuing bank. Visa member banks have access to the appropriate Visa rules and regulations as well as to the Notification of Customer Complaint forms which should be used by the bank to document and file merchant complaints.”

Still not convinced? Let look at the MasterCard policy. Can a merchant charge me a fee to use my MasterCard card? Can a merchant require a minimum purchase amount to use my MasterCard card? The answer to the first question is almost never; the answer to the second question is not ever.

I think I have made my case here. So, start a fist fight! No, just kidding, perhaps this is a more humane way to deal with this injustice. My personal choice is to mention it and let them know you won’t be back. The workers don’t care, but the owners will. Or, if you’d rather complain with less hoorah, write to Visa at askvisacorporate@visa.com. MasterCard complaints will be accepted at 1-800-300-3069.

[Photo CC by Brett L.]

Fare Well Bo Diddley

2008-06-09T23:48:54Z

You will be missed.

Is That a Pop-tart in Your Pocket?

2008-05-31T16:01:56Z

My younger girls love the laundry. They unfold it, sit on it, roll in it and generally drag it around the house. This Saturday morning I woke up and headed downstairs to get a up of coffee. I put some cargo shorts on from the day before to get me by until I can wake up and tackle the day. I sat down at the computer to download some pictures from an awards ceremony from my oldest girl. When I got up to hit the shower, I noticed a heavy feeling in my pocket. I jammed my hand in to the pocket to find a mushed up Pop-tart. In the time it took me to type this post, a root beer was shaken up and exploded and a dish of cat food was dumped on the floor. With kids, you never know. Well, I better get going, I think I heard a crash in the living room. The good news is I am going to hop them up on sugar and drop them with Grandma for the day!

[Photo CC by Missionshine]

Bloggingthat

Landing on Mars, NASA’s Phoenix Project

2008-06-12T13:46:33Z

Should we really be spending our greatest technical resources and dollars searching for water on Mars? Is there something we could be doing on Earth to improve our quality of life? I have read, from various sources, that the project is upward of 500 Million dollars. Could we spend that money more wisely, perhaps using space technology to improve the quality of our water on Earth? Food for thought.

BloggingThat

Honor Our Military Servicemen and Women

2008-06-12T13:47:15Z

Please honor our military service men and women who have given their lives for our great country.

Where’s the Beef, O’Bradys

2008-05-23T03:28:49Z

Being a product of the 80’s, I love the tag line. I also have an acute sense for customer service or lack there of. That being said, I was at a local [family] burger joint with my wife and young child. My wife and I ordered hamburgers. My child ordered a hamburger from the child’s menu. The waitress tells us they are out of hamburgers from the child’s menu. Does anyone see a problem with this? As far as I can remember, hamburgers are made by smashing ground beef in to patties regardless the size or shape. Besides, if you are out of small, you give the customer large. It is your fault that you are out [of child burgers], not ours.

I do have more important things to think about, like, buying random kids video games so they can stop pretending to play. Don’t tell me you’re out of small food when you’re serving large food of the same kind.

Bloggingthat

Photo by Ran’s

Rock Paper Scissors

2008-05-21T03:57:52Z

Sometimes life can teach us a lot without even trying. I just found out I didn’t know how to spell scissors, nor could I find a pair in my house if I tried. Why by do kids love scissors? (and running with them) But, I digress. This is about making decisions, really important, life changing stuff here. A precipice of sorts. You could make a list of pros and cons. Weighing each aspect against another to measure its imperturbableness. Or, maybe einy meni mini mo, naw too childish. How about rock, paper scissors? But, who am I playing against? Can a rock really cover paper? It is not a bad thing, it’s just the edge, out of the box, the line in the sand, the coup de grace, the whole enchilada, very exciting and I can’t make everyone happy. This entire dialect occurred in my brain in less than five seconds. I have never really tried to capture it until now. I almost always come to the same conclusion when I think like this. I am digging deep, here and I came up with something I can hang on to.

Faith Meme!’s photo

Jewelry Teeth

2008-05-01T17:18:01Z

Kylie, my four year old daugter, got two crowns on the bottom molars and she calls them her jewelry teeth. She is very proud of them and I don’t have the heart to correct her by saying that it’s her grillz. OhhKaayyy! Yeahhhhah! (Photo of random man with grillz.)

[Photo CC By Uberculture]

How to Pull Anything From YouTube With RSS

2008-04-24T04:02:03Z

I saw something today that blew my mind. I have been using Google reader to bring the web to me as opposed to surfing thanks to my brother Steve. I also love to watch YouTube videos, but I still had to search for them which took a lot of time. Now for the beauty.

In the Google reader, add a subscription. In the box, type ‘http://youtube.com/rss/tag/funny.rss’ Your reader will now feed you everything tagged as funny that Youtube has to offer. It took a while for this to aggregate or whatever. Substitute ‘funny’ with your topic, Ehh. BloggingThat

Hello Blogging My Old Friend

2009-02-23T06:01:44Z

The Sound of Silence

Hello blogging, my old friend,
I’ve come to talk with you again,
Because Wordpress softly creeping,
Left its seeds while I was sleeping,
And the version that was planted in my brain
2.5 remains
Within the sound of silence.

6:60PM BloggingThat is down.

In restless dreams I walked alone
Database of cobblestone,
neath the halo of a street lamp,
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of
A neon light
That backup right
And touched the sound of silence.

7:23 in desperation, called brother

And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people, tech support.
People blogging without speaking,
People hearing without listening,
People writing songs that voices never share
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of silence.

7:31 called Godaddy

Fools said I, you do not know
Blogging like a cancer grows.
Hear my words that I might teach you,
Take my arms that I might reach you.
But my words like silent raindrops fell,
And echoed
In the wells of silence

7:45 realized I shot self in foot

And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon God they made.
And the sign flashed out its warning,
In that BloggingThat was forming.
And the signs said, the words of the prophets
Are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls.
And whispered in the sounds of silence.

8:30 BloggingThat is back minus a few posts

BloggingThat