Blood & Mud

A tribute to Ronan O'Fucking Gara

2013-05-21T19:56:13+01:00

blood&mud

SHIT/GOOD™ Ratings: Heineken Cup Final

2013-05-21T08:40:16+01:00

The Big Cup final ended with a piece of grand larceny by Toulon to pip Clermont to the title, which we sort of predicted, but what did the ratings computer make of it all?

SHIT

Danie Roussow - Not a great day on the park for the big blind-side. Looked very lumbering in letting Rougerie go in the lead up to the Nalaga try and bossed by opposite number Bonnaire.

Delon Armitage - People will say that his wave and tongue-out shenanigans are at least "different" and add colour to the game. I'm not one of those people, I say he's a twat.

Wesley Fofana - The best centre in Europe is a title that no-one would argue with so it was a real shame that he didn't look anything like that in the biggest game in Europe.

GOOD

Aurelien Rougerie - I've never been the greatest fan of the champion the wonder horse like winger cum centre. But he was at the heart of everything that was good for Clermont

Jamie Cudmore - won all his line-outs and carried tirelessly off the 10 channel right to the end.

Juan Martin Fernandez Lobbe - Great turnover and vision to set up that twat Armitage for the winning score, obviously, but more than that he was everywhere all game leading his pack. Perfect example of his level of effort was when he ran off the pitch, over a load of tackle bags to catch a touchfinder to enable him to take a quick throw in from nearly in the stands.

That's mine, you give us yours in the comments.

For those that didn't know, I had a go at alternative commentary for this match and it would help me out a great deal if you could have a listen to my commentaries so I can bump up the listener numbers on YouCommentate. Plus you never know, you might enjoy them...
First half is here: http://bit.ly/13FzUVd
Second Half Part 1: http://bit.ly/13wqYhi
Second Half Part 2: http://bit.ly/YSiW4c

British & Irish Lions: Fly Half Question Could define tour

2013-05-20T07:58:00+01:00

by Alex Jackson

As we edge towards the British and Irish Lions' tour to Australia, and the Paddy Power rugby union odds start to gather pace, there is still a massive debate over who will start at fly-half for Warren Gatland’s men.

Admittedly there was a lack of options for the Kiwi to choose from, especially with Rhys Priestland’s injury woes and Jonny Wilkinson turning down the chance to tour, meaning most rugby betting fans and pundits would have eventually opted for Gatland’s choices of Jonathan Sexton and Owen Farrell.

Since coming of age in the 2009 Heineken Cup final, Sexton has been at the forefront of Leinster’s success but despite his many qualities, questions still remain over his game management and goal-kicking, although full-back Leigh Halfpenny’s form means he will more than likely take responsibility from the tee.

Farrell is still definitely a work in progress, especially as he’s only really established himself as an international number 10 in the last year and has spent most of the season playing outside Charlie Hodgson for Saracens.

Like his main rival for the shirt, the son of Lions’ defence coach Andy has often failed to ignite his back-line while playing for his country and is still to demonstrate that he can truly control a game.

Coach Gatland’s decision to only pick two fly-halves possibly demonstrates that he still harbours hopes of persuading Wilkinson to join up with the touring party and many fans would love to see Sexton start against Australia, with the Toulon playmaker coming on after an hour to close games out.

However, with that situation yet to arise, there are still a number of questions surrounding who will guide the Lions and you get the feeling that they will have to raise their performance to new levels if their side are to have any chance of winning their first series since 1997.

Heineken Cup Final Preview: Clermont Auvergne vs Toulouse

2013-05-17T19:49:51+01:00

The final of The Big Cup is here and it is to be fought out by two French teams for the fourth time, once again proving that the cheese-chompers really are the mack daddies when it comes to this tournament. And chomping cheese.

Few would argue that these two are not the best teams in Europe - Stuart Barnes probably would, the contrary bellend - each one featuring superstars rubbing shoulders with super players of less renown. This should be a feast for the senses for all rugby fans, especially if you watch it a bit drunk, which given the kick off time is a certainty in my house.

This match will be all about partnerships and which ones come out on top. The craft & bosh of Giteau/Bastareaud vs the craft and running of Fofana/Rougerie; the power and seething anger of Cudmore/Hines vs the rage & jumpy, jumpy of Botha & Kennedy. The half backs is a pushover as Clermont have Parra, the cocky-faced master of insouciant class while Toulon have some no-mark with a double barrelled name.

But, what of St Jonny of Wilkinson? I've a feeling that Toulon's frighteningly good back row will best the not quite as frightening offering from Clermont, which will lead to more penalties for Toulon which will lead to...well you know the rest. Given it's probably going to be pissing down, that will likely be enough.

Don't forget, that to enhance your viewing experience, your favourite blog will be having a go at commentating on this match. Check in at http://youcommentate.com/s/bloodandmud/ just before kick-off to hear me a bit tipsy and ranting.

B&M Prediction: Toulon by 5

Spotter's Badge: Nick Kennedy stands in the middle while Cudmore, Hines & Botha rub around him fighting in a Looney Tunes style.

Toulon: D.Armitage; Wulf, Bastareaud, Giteau, Palisson; Wilkinson (Capt.), Tillous-Borde; Sheridan, Bruno, Hayman; Botha, Kennedy; Rossouw; Fernandez Lobbe, Masoe.

Replacements: Orioli, Jenkins, Kubriashvili, Van Niekerk, S.Armitage, Mermoz, Michalak, Suta.

Clermont: Byrne; Sivivatu, Rougerie (Capt.), Fofana, Nalaga; James, Parra; Domingo, Kayser, Zirakashvili; Cudmore, Hines; Bonnaire, Vosloo, Chouly.

Replacements: Paulo, Debaty, Ric, Pierre, Bardy, Radosavljevic, Skrela, King.

Rugby Video: Fat players scoring tries

2013-05-17T13:14:24+01:00

Does exactly what it says on the tin

Rugby Video: Tom Croft 60 metre try vs Harlequins

2013-05-14T13:34:36+01:00

Tom Croft is hitting the kind of form that could make a glass eye weep with unbridled joy. This no doubt means he'll get broken before the first British & Irish Lions test, but we can dream while it lasts...

Rugby World Cup 2015: Stadium choices – the reaction

2013-05-07T21:57:11+01:00

Wembley: an "ultra-modern cauldron famous for its lack of atmosphere at England football internationals"

by Alex Jackson

The RFU’s stadium choices to host the 2015 Rugby World Cup have come under close scrutiny in the betting world this week as fans give mixed reactions to the venues. The biggest news is that the Olympic Stadium will stage five games at the tournament, despite the quite obvious problem of a running track around the pitch, and the fact it has no rugby pedigree.

The future of this stadium is still in doubt, and its development are still in doubt, with football club West Ham United wanting to renovate it and bring the stands closer to the action. While this is undoubtedly a good idea, it is yet unknown if these changes can be implemented by 2015.

If the Olympic Stadium is used in its current state many rugby betting fans are likely to voice their displeasure, with the distance between field and terrace too great to generate that atmospheric buzz a World Cup demands.

Wembley has also been chosen for the tournament – that ultra-modern cauldron famous for its lack of atmosphere at England football internationals and ridiculous food and drink pricing – but thankfully there are genuine rugby stadiums also on the list.

The RFU should get credit for selecting Gloucester’s Kingsholm stadium and Sandy Park at Exeter. Although these venues aren’t the multi-purpose super structures of Wembley and the Olympic at least they boast the heritage and environment of real English rugby.

Thankfully both Twickenham and the Millennium are expected to host major games, with the former to stage the final, while Newcastle Falcons fans have a chance to watch matches at St James’ Park.

Yet it is still disappointing an underdeveloped Olympic Stadium and a soulless Wembley earn hosting rights merely for their size, with no guarantee they will actually be filled. After all, there is nothing worse than a giant stadium populated with only a few thousand people in it; the atmosphere is akin to a lonely man shouting obscenities in an empty warehouse.

Rugby Video: Jonny Wilkinson gets flattened vs Agen

2013-05-07T08:02:00+01:00

An equation for you Jonny:

Head wrong side + poor set position = being put on your arse and remaining there for quite some time.

Video via @ajjolley

British & Irish Lions: A sneak peek at Rob Howley's first strategy meeting with the inside backs

2013-05-02T07:53:00+01:00

Many are puzzled by the selection of only two fly-halves in the British & Irish Lions squad.

But, considering that the midfield has a combined weight of 1,587 stones and then this secret coaching flipchart page our insiders have sent us, it all becomes very clear.

Given this plan, whoever plays 10 has clear instructions to let the monsters do their work, and so will only have the ball for 42 seconds in any given eighty minute game, thus avoiding being tackled and the possibility of injury.

Genius in its simplicity.

British & Irish Lions: Squad analysis by your favourite rugby blog

2013-04-30T14:46:26+01:00

After what seems like 37 years of interminable conjecture, intrigue, banality and pointlessness on the part of the rugby media and some fans, Warren Gatland has today finally put us all out of our misery and named the British & Irish Lions Squad to tour Australia. Let’s take it section by section...

Fullbacks - Halfpenny, Hogg, Kearney

Hard to argue with that. Unless both his legs fall off or he catches scurvy on the plane, Halfpenny will start the Tests with Kearney as backup. Hogg is there for the experience that his talent deserves, and given that the Kiwi Cuboid has only selected two fly-halves, it looks like he’s there to cover 10 as well

Wings - Bowe, Cuthbert, Maitland, North

Gatland loves a big winger, and each of these are over 15 stones. Maitland is a surprise, or more specifically him being in ahead of Tim Visser. This blog would’ve taken Visser, other than that I concur. That is all.

Centres – J Davies, O’Driscoll, J Roberts, Tuilagi

The most obvious issue is that there is only one recognised 12, so we can safely assume that the 12-13 axis will be a repeat of 2009, with Roberts & BOD filling the jerseys. But what if the 10 is getting hammered? There is no pressure relieving kicking outlet at 12, so if Roberts isn’t at his line-busting, offloading best, which he hasn't been regularly for a while, what’s the Plan B? I guess it’s the same as Plan A, only with Manu doing the BOOM-POP! carrying instead.

Fly-halves – Sexton, Farrell

No great surprise. The Cuboid has confirmed that Jonny said no to a tour invite, hence he’s not here. It would've been interesting to see if there had been three 10s had he said yes, but that’s as pointless a musing as it is academic now. Both Farrell and Sexton have talent, but are yet to convince with their consistency of temperament, but with Halfpenny likely on place-kicking duties, the pressure will be off slightly. Only slightly, though. Aussies will target this as a fragility.

Scrum-halves - Murray, Phillips, B Youngs

Phillips and Ben Youngs were always nailed on to tour, but as for Conor Murray.... I’ve made no secret of my view of young Conor; he makes poor decisions, turns quick-ball into slow ball and is more average than a government statistical benchmark; either one of the Scottish nines would've been a better shout.

Backrow - Croft, Faletau, Heaslip, Lydiate, O'Brien, Tipuric, Warburton (captain)

The Omission Of Robshaw, which is the first real shock of the squad, could end up as a TV drama, such is the interest in it among the mainstream media and those people in your workplace who normally pay no attention to rugby. With Warburton & Tipuric always likely to get the nod at seven, Robshaw was never going in that position, so this selection indicates that the Cuboid believes Tom Croft, Dan Lydiate & even Sean O’Brien to be better sixes than the England Captain. Expect much debate on this one. I blogged a little while back that I expected Dan Lydiate on the plane, and so it has proved. However, would any other coach than Gatland have taken him at this stage of his recovery and form? Doubtful.

Warburton as captain, given his accepted influence and impressive character, is less controversial than the fact that this means he’s starting the Tests, which many would not have gone for given what's gone before in 2013. Can’t help thinking this is aslso Gatland’s way of giving the two-fingered salute to, and re-asserting his seniority over Rob Howley.

Locks - Evans, Gray, Wyn Jones, O'Connell, Parling

Joe Launchbury can consider himself unlucky, but he’s young enough to have another chance. Richie Gray is picked on talent rather than form after an indifferent season, but Gatland had to get another Scot in here somewhere didn’t he? I’m glad for Geoff Parling, who has been consistent and classy on the quiet for a while, while the other three would’ve been on most people’s squad list yesterday. Test pair will be O'Connell plus one of the Welsh lads.

Hookers - Hartley, Hibbard, Youngs

What no Rory Best? An omission of Robshawesque proportions. However, at least Robshaw can offset his disappointment by telling himself there is some real quality in the backrow; Best on the other hand should be put on suicide watch when it sink in that someone thought Tom Youngs was better than him. TOM YOUNGS?!

Props - Cole, Healy, Jenkins, Jones, Stevens, Vunipola

Matt Stevens, who hasn’t played international rugby for a while is surely selected as he can play on both sides of the scrum. He also has the contacts to score nocturnal party product for the midweek team (allegedly). Ryan Grant will be upset, but Gatland has obviously seen something in Vunipola that he really likes. It seems that these props are picked without scrummaging ability as the main criterion.