Beer and Sport

Luke Watson wants to vomit on Springbok Jersey

2008-10-13T13:13:00.005+11:00

South Africa's first white quota player and captain elect Luke Watson, has made some startling comments this week.

"Me having to wear the Springbok jersey, to keep myself from vomiting on it, because there is a bigger picture, because men and women have bled for me to get there.

"Did I ever want to be there? No, it's never been my dream, but I chose this burden with the greatest of pride and satisfaction, knowing that my father Cheeky Watson laid down his life to get me there.

"the problem with SA rugby is that it is controlled by Dutchmen", whilst Watson also suggested that SA rugby is "rotten to the core" and that "the men who sit on my left and right of me in the change room despise me for who I am".

He concludes his speech in the third person, a great way to get any point across

"I'm not throwing some political twist to this transformation, I'm not saying transformation of South African rugby. I'm not saying transformation of the man next to me, on my left or on my right.

"I'm saying transformation of Luke Watson. Because, when I've transformed, when I've pushed on, when I'm alive, when I'm reaching for my destiny, the man next to me he will automatically get upset. The man next to me automatically gets uncomfortable.

"He looks at me and says: 'There is something different about this man, there is something different about Luke Watson. He can't be bought - I can't throw the Springbok jersey at him and expect him to beg for it, to be on his knees, because it is not going to happen'.

SARU has called an urgent meeting on Monday to determine the accuracy of the reports with Western Province, the player's contracting union, and UCT, where the statements were said to have been made.

Watson's father Cheeky was an outspoken anti-racism activist during the apartheid era who declined the opportunity to participate in Springbok trials as a promising player because of his convictions and has made no secret of his displeasure with the game's current administration. Now it would appear that Luke is following his fathers beliefs, and putting his position as Stormers captain in jepoardy in the process.

The civil rights initiative AfriForum has since sent Watson a letter and intends to have him summoned to the Equality Court on charges of hate speech if he refuses to withdraw his comments.

Beer and Sport the Domain

2008-10-10T11:01:00.001+11:00

As part of the ongoing Birthday celebrations at Beer and Sport, I've treated myself to a few presents.

Firstly there's the shiny new domain: www.beerandsport.net . If you get a chance please update your links ;)

Next, I put together a banner for the site which showcases many of my personal sporting heroes, in carefully selected shots that show them in a manner that I like to remember.

Richie Benaud for me is a commentating hero, and while he did a lot with the bat and ball in the 50's, for me he's a hero as a commentator. Darryl Hair makes an appearance as I've always respected his integrity and stuborness as great qualities for an umpire to possess. There's even a Queenslander in John Eales, and a great NSW Rugby Player Chris Latham who unfortunately spent much of his career in exile.

Roy and HG are a huge influence and just had to make an appearence on the banner of fame.

And thanks to Warney and his 3 foot inflateable googly, according to Gagger, I "might have the only sports blog with a famous sportsmans erection on it?". What a claim to fame that is!

SANZAR sabotage Tahs' 2009 chances

2008-10-09T11:08:00.005+11:00

Obviously not content with the draw developed as part of the 5 year plan, some SANZAR muppet has gone and sabotaged next years draw under the pretense of accommodation the Lions tour of South Africa, thoroughly shafting the Tahs in the process.

Our schedule now has us as the first AU or NZ team in 12 years of Super Rugby to travel to South Africa twice. But wait there's more, we also get two trips to NZ, and if we're to somehow overcome this absolute barry-crocker of a draw and make the finals, we could be looking at a third trip to the Republic of Boneheads.

Week 1 - Johannesburg
Week 2 - Wellington
Week 3 - Sydney
Week 4 - Sydney
Week 5 - Sydney
Week 6 - Canberra
Week 7 - Sydney
Week 8 - Auckland
Week 9 - Sydney
Week 10 - Sydney
Week 11 - Sydney
Week 12 - Bye
Week 13 - Kimberly
Week 14 - Durban

The news is coming from SA Rugby, and this quote perfectly shows their empathy for the Stormers hectic schedule.

This time it is the Stormers that get the shortened Sicof the stick. They play Crusaders in New Zealand before returning to Australia for matches against the Waratahs and Brumbies before another trans-Tasman trip to play the Hurricanes and Highlanders in New Zealand.

Oh poor Stormers, what a very short stick. My God, you actually have to travel to New Zealand twice from Eastern Australia, that's like 3 hours in a plane! Perhaps you can take some comfort from the 'Tahs who, in addition to two trips to South Africa, also get two of these horrific trans-Tasman trips.

Strongest Baa Baa's ever to take on Wallabies

2008-10-08T14:53:00.004+11:00

Gregan's long time understudy at the Brumbies Luke Burgess is set to go head to head with his former master in December's London Olympic centenary match at Wembley.

In a star studded Baa Baa's lineup that has both Gregan and Fourie Du Preez I feel that Fourie may play this match at 10. The squad will be captained by Richie 'tackles' McCaw and coached by World Cup winning combination of Jake White and former Wallabies mentor cum technical analyst and Eddie 'Steady' Jones for good measure.

In what looks to be the strongest squad to ever wear the blue and white hoops, of those announced so far the team is looking like:

1. TBA
2. John Smit (RSA)
3. Carl Hayman (NZ)
4. Steve Borthwick (Eng)
5. Bakkies Botha (RSA)
6. Jerry Collins (NZ)
7. Schalk Burger (RSA)
8. TBA

9. George Gregan
10. Fourie Du Preez (RSA)
11. Bryan Habana (RSA)
12. Jean de Villiers (RSA)
13. TBA
14. Joe Rokocoko (NZ)
15. Percy Montgomery (RSA)

Coach: Jake White
Assistant Coach: Eddie Jones

Viddy Blog - Kefu's Try

2008-10-08T14:17:00.002+11:00

Vodafone Australia recently held a competition which was to recreate a Golden Bledisloe Moment.

Inspired by the Aethiest's viddy-blogs, my wife and I choose to redo Toutai Kefu's match winning try from the 2001 Bledisloe Cup in Sydney.

The comp was meant to be judged on 3/10/08 at 3pm but as yet there's been no announcement of who won the trip for 4 to Hong Kong on 1/11/08. Well fingers crossed ;)

Beer and Sport Re-Birth

2008-10-08T10:50:00.005+11:00

With a decent cricket series about to start I thought it time to re-visit the Beer and Sport blog.

I've taken on the long overdue task of updating the B&S Blogroll, actually choosing to be a part of the blogging community by exchanging links and stuff! If I've missed you please post in the comments and if your blog isn't completely shite I'll throw you a link.

As many of the B&S readers are interested in either Cricket or Rugby but not both, I've set up individual feeds for these two main topics of discussion. So now you can either subscribe to all of Beer and Sport (highly recommended), just the Cricket, or just the Rugby.

Lastly, Blogger have finally made available a way to export and import blogs and comments (you have to log into Blogger Draft wtf!), so this also marks the end of the oxenshizer as no-one could remember this obscure reference to a card game a mate and I played in a german beer hall one night - trying to translate bullshit into Deutcsh we found oxen to mean cow with balls. Anyways, all those posts and comments have now been migrated so I'll turn off the old blog now.

The future? Well hopefully I'll make some semi-regular posts. I've had some recent technology upgrades at home so it's quite likely I'll be packaging some video highlights from the upcoming test series for your pleasure.

Keep fighting the good fight and if you see one, Kick a Vic. And always leave a comment in the blog!

The Wallaby straw that broke the Bokke's Back

2008-08-25T10:05:00.013+10:00

In a new format for Beer and Sport blogging, I've taken a published article and added my 2 cents. The base article was published on RugbyHeaven by Greg Growden

Wallabies second-rower Dan Vickerman and centre Berrick Barnes are certain to miss the Tri Nations Test against South Africa in Johannesburg on Saturday, after both suffered shoulder injuries during their triumph on the weekend.

Both had to be replaced during the first half after taking major hits from their Springboks opponents.

Vickerman's absence has prompted Wallabies team management to call up Nathan Sharpe from Perth Moses adds: Probably not a terrible thing, I've been a vocal opponent of Sharpe for some time but in truth he's had a pretty good 2008, I wouldn't go as far to say that he was unlucky to get dropped, but he could certainly show a hunger for the grunt work with this recall - the pack further weakened after a groggy James Horwill had to be helped from the field during Saturday's game after collecting a heavy knock. And Barnes's absence will result in a back-line reshuffle, with Stirling Mortlock likely to move from outside-centre to inside-centre and Ryan Cross to start at No.13. Moses adds: a shame that WaraTAHU isn't quite ready to step up into the starting side

In addition, man-of-the-match Rocky Elsom is in doubt after he was cited for pulling down Boks captain Victor Matfield at a lineout Moses adds: can't see him copping a suspension for this - was penalised at the time which seemed about right. Rocky's got a pretty clean record doesn't he?. Springboks prop CJ van der Linde will also appear at the judiciary hearing on Monday after being penalised for diving head-first into an opponent at the ruck. Moses adds: I'm tipping 4 weeks, he could have broken Cordingley's jaw with that head butt (pictured above), and he did it again at another ruck later on! I'm also surprised that Schalk didn't get cited for the squirrel grip on Smith, but again Robbie is as good as his word not getting involved with citings and letting it all stay on the field. Much respect.

The Springboks' problems run much deeper than missing personnel, however. They are rapidly losing credibility with their impatient supporters, who vented their anger after the loss. Both coach Moses adds: token puppet Peter de Villiers and skipper Matfield were booed by the crowd while each did on-field interviews after the match. It was an embarrassing moment for the Springboks, who are not accustomed to falling away on home turf - but worse was to come, with the Sunday Tribune newspaper running the headline: "Give us our money back". Moses adds: If this is the reception their getting in Durban, where traditionally their more respectful supporters live, wtf is going to happen in Joeberg next week?

De Villiers and Matfield said they could understand the spectators being upset. "They do have the right to be unhappy," de Villiers said. "South Africa is a proud nation. They want to be winners. So yeah, the one big message we want to put out there is that we will never go out there and lose a game on purpose." Moses adds: unless they've got money on the Wallabies to win the Tri-Nations at $4.70 like me

Matfield was as direct, saying: "We're the Springboks. We're the world champs, and we've lost two games in a row. Moses adds: someone get Victor an abacus, it's three in a row :slap If you go into the change room and have a look at the players, they definitely feel worse than the crowd out there. But it's unacceptable. It's our job. It's our work. It's our passion. And it is not acceptable to play like that."

What is irking the Springboks public and media most is that after winning the World Cup last year with an aggressive, well-structured formula, the new regime has demanded all-out attack and relentless midfield kicking. It seems the players aren't certain what their coach wants from them - and with that comes confusion on the pitch. Moses adds: well, that and dropping the ball, passing it out, dropping kicks, knock on's and POOR DISCIPLINE

But de Villiers was adamant he will not be changing. "I have a new playing style which we are trying to put out there, and Rome wasn't built in one day," the coach said. Moses adds: but all roads lead to Springbok defeat

"So we have to be patient. I ask the public to give us some time to get to grips about what we want to do. If we execute this playing style correctly, I think with the speed, power and great athleticism, combined with talent, it is going to be enormous, Moses adds: ooh, enormous, nuff said. and people are going to find it very hard to stop us."

De Villiers said the Springboks had to change because of the experimental law variations. "Look how we were caught fast asleep in the first part of the Super 14 by not changing," he said. "When the teams started changing, they won the games. So we have to do that.

"The players and myself think we are on the right track. Moses adds: perhaps a better track would be winning home matches, no? They just have to get used to it, and they will get used to it. We will be there … I'm telling you." Moses adds: can't wait, it'll be enormous.

Sonny Bill's rugby future

2008-08-08T10:58:00.003+10:00

Some good points raised by the dropkicks on the whole $BW saga, and not the usual league press drivel that we get subjected to even on Australian Rugby Union sites (you know who you are!).

If SBW's intention is to play French rugby and make a truckload of money, he's going to come up trumps. Perhaps he should have thought about this before he signed a 5 year deal at the dogies, but who really cares about Cantebury.

I can't see the French giving a toss about what some Aussie court say, after all they blow up boats in allied harbours, test Nukes in tropical paradise then don't evacuate the locals when the wind changes, and sold a Nuclear reactor to Sadaam.

Sure if it were a criminal act they might extradite but it's not like he'd be facing gaol for walking out on his employer. What is likely however is SBW being refused entry to work (or play) in Australia, at the least for the remaining 4 years on his contract.

Without entry to Australia he would find playing Super 14 somewhat troublesome. In the current climate this would exclude him from All Black selection, assuming that he's even good enough to get selected for the AB's, and they believe he'd honour any contract they sign with him.

Found: Blindside Flanker for Tahs in 2009

2008-07-24T15:15:00.000+10:00

With the departure of Rocky Elsom and Dan Vickerman, the Tahs are facing a dearth of tall timber to lead them to the title in 2009.

I've been scouting around and reckon I've found the perfect person to sign up as a blindside.

He's 195cm (6'5"), 102kg, got mongrel on tap, extremely athletic, and certainly not the first player of another code to come across to the Waratahs.

What's more, he's unwanted by his current club, already in Sydney, has a very high profile so would bring a whole lot of new fans across to rugby, and O'Neill would likely sign on as he'd get that Gorilla off his back.

I give you Barry Hall.

Bledisloe press circus continues

2008-07-24T12:05:00.003+10:00

After observing the Seth Efrikaans scrum coming off second best to a revived Wallabies outfit, the Kiwi's have resorted to pre-match referee influencing 101 with "but they cheat!" Hardly revelations, but it's a line that has been well spun before, most notably by Jake White and his rainbow entourage.

The latest accusations are led by former Kiwi prop John Drake, who has assumed position as un-official spokesperson for the All Blecks front row, clearly perceiving them as a weakness and requiring a spokesperson to influence the referee. The story goes that our front row's high body position during the "Crouch" causes the opposition pack to have to come up which puts them off.

Obviously not one to let physics get in the way of a good scrummage, Drake is ideally qualified to comment considering he watched the game on TV. He goes on to say "They probably cheated at scrum time." Strong words indeed.

For the sake of clarity, here is IRB Law 20 (i)

A crouched position is the extension of the normal stance by bending the knees sufficiently to move into the engagement without a charge.

To Summarise, Knees bent = No cheat.

Someone slightly closer to the team, the Blecks forwards coach Steve Hansen has weighed in questioning the manner in which Burgess "spun the ball into the scrum." Checking the relevant law, 20.6 (b)

The scrum half must hold the ball with both hands, with its major axis parallel to the ground and to the touchline over the middle line between the front rows, mid-way between knee and ankle.

Hansen may in fact have a point, if indeed Burgess is spinning the ball in rather than rolling it. Will have to check the footage on this one to be sure.

Well, on the oh so delicate subject of cheating, now that Richie McCheat is unfit we need to start some accusations of our own. Here's a few to get started

Rodney Rodney So'olialo - lying all over the ball
Jerome Kaino - offside at lineout
Daniel Braid - doing it all night, all night ref
Andrew Hore - doesn't throw straight
Ali Williams - grabbing the man in the air
Brad Thorn - throws people on their back causing unrelated groin injuries
Tony Woodcock - collapses scrum, weak as piss
Greg Sommerville - boring in
Anthony Tuitavake - late tackles
Ma'scar'a Nonu - drug cheat
Richard Kahui - not back 10m from free kick
Sitiveni Sivivatu - wife beater
Dan Carter - entire team in front of kicker

3N Game 4/9 | Bledisloe Game 1/4 | 26/7/08 | Wallabies vs All Blacks in Sydney

2008-07-23T11:12:00.005+10:00

After 3 matches it's 1 game a piece in the Tri-Nations. The Blecks are leading on the table, but in reality it's the Boks who hold poll position with 5 points from 3 away games.

The Softboks under their head token puppet have developed a culture that can only be described as "Eddie Jones". John Smit is leading by example and thinks that blaming his groin injury on Thorn's dirty dump all and sundry to forget that he played on for 30 minutes after the fact.

Bok management are going on ad-nauseum that the judiciary is weighted in favour of Kiwi's after Thorn got 1 week and Bismark missed 1 game for an eye gouge. Conveniently they've gone quiet on Bakkies Botha getting off scot free from concussing Stirling Mortlock in an off the ball incident.

Game 4 is going to be a thriller in a Sydney. The Blecks are likely to get back their captain while the Wallabies are sans Mortlock.

Ryan Cross is likely to start at 13, with Tim Tam Tahu likely to pick up his first bench spot. The Wallabies certainly have a league flavour to them, with 6, 12, 13, 14 and 19 all having spent time in the pokie subsidised code.

While in reality our chances of winning back the Bledisloe were sold by the ARU for Hong Kong Dollars, it's a great chance for Robbie Deans to get one up on his former NZRU masters.

Bring It On!

Super 14 finals expand

2008-07-21T14:47:00.001+10:00

SANZAR are set to approve a Top 6 playoff for the Super 14 Series from next year.

Personally I think this is fantastic news, and while the structure has yet to be announced, it's likely that a rest week will reward the first and second placed teams, while affording a shot at glory to the 5th and 6th placed teams.

Looking at this years table and you see that while the Hurricanes finished 4th on 41 points, the Stormers missed out also with 41 points on their For/Against margin. The Blues in 6th place on 40 points were 6 points clear of the pack led by the Chiefs on 34.

2007 and it's the same story - places 2 to 6 have just 2 competition points between them, then it's a further 8 points to 7th.

2006, yep you guessed it, a three way tie for 4th position ; the Bulls made it based on +65 point For/Against over the Sharks who had +64. In 2006 7th was only 2 points adrift before the mid-table divide to 8th.

Prior to that it was the Super 12, so less games played by all, and a final 4 was appropriate. Historically looking at the impact this would have had since the 2006, it's hard to argue against.

Wallabies vs Springboks, 3N game 3, Review in Pictures - 1st Half.

2008-07-21T09:52:00.003+10:00

Some snapshots from the first half of Wallabies vs Boks. If there's any interest I'll do the second half later and consider making snapshots a recurring blog. Oh, these are dodgy ones taken with the digital camera, however, the new PC is going so in the future I'll have good quality TV capture images with optimum quality (well, best you'll get taking pics of a TV anyway).

Click the images for full size.

Pre-Game feature with Rod Kafer getting out the chalkboard to explain to Kobus Weise why size doesn't matter.

Palu forgets the offside rule and gifts francois the Penalty kick.

Francois makes the conversoin, 3-0 to the Springboks

It's thirsty being a token puppet

Mortlock committing to the high ball which popped out of his arms

Bakkies Botha sees amusment in George Smith trying to pick a fight with him

Francois gets into our half so fires off a drop goal, missed out to the right

Giteau's patented head into hip tackle still not working, and Piers Spies makes a good break after bouncing out of this one

Lote runs a good line and makes great metres down the middle of the field

Then Piers Spies shows why he played wing for the Boks U19 squad by running down Tuqiri

Baxter pounces on the loose ball making Januarie look slow in the process

Rocky discovers his inner claret while getting penalised for not supporting his own body weight.

The resulting scrum is collapsed by CJ Van Der Linde with the Wallabies being awarded a full arm penalty on the Boks feed.

can't beat em, join em. Berrick Barnes has a shocker of an attempt at a drop goal which dribbles along the ground towards the corner.

Rocky goes into the blood bin as his eye is still leaking, MMM gets a run.

George Smith shows why he is one of the best in the business and pilfers the ball from right under Steyn's nose.

From a Bok scrum, JP Pietersen enters the backline and they create a gap in midfield by committing Barnes to Pietersen and Mortlock to Steyn while DeVilliers pops through the gap and is away.

The Springboks get within striking distance, and the Wallabies defence scrambles well to hold them up on the tryline. Horwill gets in a sneaky hand from an offside position which the ref rules as lost forward by the springboks.

Giteau's skillful kick over the bok tryline gives Jantes a lucky bounce to ground the ball in goal under pressure.

The Boks manage to cross through Habana, unfortunately the last pass from Britz went forward along the ground as he was trying to avoid the sideline.

Tuqiri bashes through Jean to cross in the corner, 5-3 to the Wallabies.

The Conrad Falcon is rarely seen this far north in the winter months.

Smite Smit

2008-07-10T15:45:00.002+10:00

When did the Springboks turn into the Softboks? I remember a time when they were feared for their mongrel, brutality and acceptance of what happens on the field stays on the field. Now they're acting like a gaggle of netballers.

I don't like Peter DeVilliers. I don't believe that he's the best man for the job. Actually, I don't believe he's in the top 5 best men for the job, however he is likely the best black man for the job, no wonder he's been branded Peter the Puppet. But he's not the target of today's blog.

I used to think that John Smit was a pretty good player and captain who commanded respect. Now I Smite Smit. He's accused Brad Thorn of "unsportsmanlike conduct" and claimed that the "spear tackle" caused the groin injury that ended his tour.

Bullsh1t. He played on for 30 minutes after the Thorn hit, and from Watching the footage he was unimpaired until:

IMO; it [the injury] happens at the 35:40 mark when he is caught up on one leg driving against Williams. He goes up high on his right leg and the inertia rotates him outward, ouch I can feel my own, there is a slightly audilble yell and after tumbling down on the right side of the breakdown, he is very slow to get up and when he does, he is limping. During the ruck, you can see him struggling to get his left leg back on the ground.

Prior to that, I tracked him from the 29:50 mark and he is fine. From this point: he drove hard into 3 breakdowns, ran back 30 meters after AB grubber, no limp, and seconds later a strong, low driving tackle on Thompson at 30:26, Not the kind a person with a severe groin pull makes, all this while continuing to scrummage and generally get aroung the field. The same tackle that Nesbitt so strongly credited Burger with but it was Smit that drove him back. To me it is clear, and clearly unsportsmanlike to falsely accuse Thorn.

(thanks to Will the thrill for the quote).

Smit goes on to say "I'm really not happy about having to sit in South Africa and watch the Springboks beat the All Blacks in Dunedin." I guess he'll be f'ucking spewing when the Sprinboks lose in Dunedin.

Dingo Deans names Anglo 15

2008-07-04T10:17:00.003+10:00

At a time when the Protea's have abandoned their quota system in favour of a quota coach under instructions to pick lots of players of colour, Robbie Deans has picked a team on merit that for the first time that I can remember, has a completely white starting 15.

Wallabies: Adam Ashley-Cooper, Peter Hynes, Stirling Mortlock (capt), Berrick Barnes, Lachlan Turner, Matt Giteau, Luke Burgess, Stephen Hoiles, Phil Waugh, Rocky Elsom, Nathan Sharpe, James Horwill, Al Baxter, Stephen Moore, Benn Robinson.

Late injuries to Palu and Tuqiri have forced the changes, and with the constant selection of Gregan over the past decade and Willie 'Ofahengaue before him, it's no surprise

Australia v Ireland - Promo

2008-06-13T08:58:00.001+10:00

ELV Insanity Continues

2008-06-04T15:36:00.006+10:00

The ELV's were designed in Stellenbosch by a panel appointed by the IRB and led by Rod MacQueen. Perversely, the reason for their design was to simplify the game of Rugby. While this simplification may eventually lead to less confusion around the contest for possession, it's the manner and timing of their implementation that has led to this current state of insanity.

I've spent half the afternoon when I should have been working putting together this handy table of which ELV's apply and when. Perhaps the teams, players and referees can print it out and refer to it at the bottom of mauls and when passing the ball back into their 22.

My biggest beef with the implementation of these new laws is, as with all things IRB, politics. The laws were trialled in the 2007 ARC and the players, referees, coaches, media and IRB observers all agreed they were mostly good, however there was contention over the ability to pull down mauls.

As such, the Super 14 adopted the new laws minus the pulling down of mauls. All rejoiced at the greater understanding at the breakdown, the extra minutes of ball in play, the increased turnovers in the constant battle for possession. We were happy that the fundamentals of the game hadn't changed - it was still a game for all body types, dominant scrums still dominated, and Richie McCaw was still a cheat.

Now we find ourselves having blooded the ELV's at ARC, Currie Cup, NPC and Super 14 levels. It's been an overwhelming success. Alas, bar the Scots, the Northern Hemisphere have shown little to no interest. The Poms (especially Jeremy Clarkson) seem to believe the whole ELV 'scandal' is one perpetrated by Australians in order to make their scrum competitive. Fair point, our scrum has been woeful in recent memory, but perhaps one could watch a game of the Super 14 before passing judgment.

After a great Super 14 season we now find ourselves at the June Internationals with the Northerners coming south in search of Winter. To appease them we're going to revert to the old laws. Yep, for 6 weeks only the all you can eat 3 point penalties are back on the menu. If we're lucky England and South Africa can replay the RWC final.

So, what to do for the Tri Nations then? SANZAR have pulled a rabbit out of the hat here by seamlessly sliding back to ELV's, but for good measure pulling out a further two ELV's. Until this point SANZAR had making the best of the situation, but why the f'uck would they introduce 2 extra ELV's and not the final 3 ELV's?

Now we'll go from 8 to 0 to 10 to 13 ELV's.

Here's an example of the clarity that the ELV's have given us. The 1st rule determined that Touch Judges should be referred to as Assistant Referees for the Super 14. The period between 1st May and 17th July they'll revert to Touch Judges for the June International Tests, before switching back to Assistant Referees within SANZAR while retaining the Touch Judge title elsewhere for the Tri-Nations period. From the 1st August they'll be Assistant Referees everywhere. Glad we cleared that up.

If you're interested in what these new laws actually are, here's the list of
2008 Super 14 ELV's and heres the Final ELV List from August 1s 08

World's Greatest Waratah's Supporter

2008-05-30T14:00:00.000+10:00

I've always just accepted that Phil Kearns was the worlds greatest Tahs Supporter, but now I'm not so sure.

Times tipping the Tahs in '08
Moses: 13
Kearns: 12

Number of Waratahs websites started
Moses: 1
Kearns: 0

How you're spending the week leading up to the Super 14 final
ThursdayMoses: Posting pro-Tahs articles on the Internet, putting shit on the Reds and Force
Kearns: Humpty Dumpty Good Egg Luncheon

Friday
Moses: Flying to Christchurch, arriving at midnight and going to hostel to hit the piss
Kearns: Balmoral Burn Sponsors Dinner

Saturday 6th September
Moses: Following the mighty NSW Waratahs into hostile territory to help them overcome the evil Crusaders of Cantebury
Kearns: Humpty Dumpty Ball

Sunday 7th September
Moses: Flying back to Sydney on my wife's birthday to try and make a Tahs welcome back day.
Kearns: Walking up a hill

Waratahs biggest fan? You decide.

Balmoral Burn - Phil Kearns WTF!

2008-05-30T11:21:00.006+10:00

Phil Kearns, a former 2nd division Randwick hooker, is known for his love of the mighty NSW Waratahs. He's also the champion of the Balmoral Burn which he's been flogging for several weeks on Inside Rugby. For some inexplicable reason has scheduled this charity event for the same weekend as the Super 14 final. Such a lack of faith in the Waratahs is un-Australian, it's un-NSW, and it's un-f'ucking-Kearnsey.

Now I've gotta go and fly the flag in Christchurch while Kearnsey gets off lightly playing charity games in Mosman.

Incidentally, I've looked into this charity event and it's a bloody good cause - raising money for medical equipment and holistic environments for NSW Children. They're aiming to raise $2 million by running 420 metres up the side of a cliff - Awaba street I believe.

This is a charity appeals to me. It's for our kids - not that there's anything wrong with making poverty history (glad we beat that one btw) or supporting breast cancer (everyone likes breasts) - but these are sick kids in the struggling health system of New South Wales.

Perhaps the 2 million could go towards lobbying for GST equalisation, NSW consumers are already funding the health of Queensland and Western Australian children to the tune of 2 Billion a year despite unprecedanted growth in those states. However, this is a beer and sport blog so bugger politics.

So in short, bloody good cause and after writing this I've convinced myself to chuck in a hundred at http://www.humpty.com.au/ . It's just the timing that sucks!

I believe...

2008-05-26T12:38:00.005+10:00

What a superb year it's been to be a New south Welshman. First the Pura Cup, and now a Super 14 Final. The Waratah's have been awesome this year, and the entire team and coaching staff deserve our congratulations. It's hard to pick standouts as the team effort has been phenomonal. But I'll try anyway.

Usually at times like this I'd manipulate the stats until they're in our favour, making a convincing argument for why we're going in with an advantage. While this is generally an easy task with the Baggy Greens and do-able with the Wallabies, in terms of Super Rugby at Jade Stadium it would be an excercise in futility. Apart from blatantly making stuff up there's no favourable spin I can put on this trip - each metric is stacked massively in favour of the Cantabrians.

With the old chesnuts of prior form, stats and bookie's odds abandoning me, I've instead chosen instead to appeal to Patriotism, Team Spirit, and Awesomeness. Damn, we've made the final.. is it too much to believe that we could go one more game?

Our scrum has had the best year in memory, always gaining parity and some weeks being totally dominant - winning against the feed (2 x stormers, 1 x reds). It's hard to seperate the names from some prior acts against England, however Matt Dunning and Al Baxter have been superb at tighthead, while Benn Robinson has really matured this year to be a combative loosehead. TPN's throwing is much improved, and his impact at the breakdown can't be underestimated.while Adam Freier's pick and go's are a highlight of his play in the loose.

Dean Mumm while scoring a bunch of tries himself with powerful runs and strong palm-offs has really come of age to make a potent combination with Aussie Dan, who will be sorely missed. Dan's going to be a monumental loss to the Tahs and Wallabies respectviely, any world XV would have him and Victor locking down.

The backrow have used the ELV's to their fullest, winning vital turnovers. Phil has been tackling anything that moves, often moving into the backline so he can put the smackdown on an unsuspecting centre. Legal agression has been a standout of our play, with massive hits being dealt out while maintaining an excellent disciplanary record. Two of the hardest men around - Jerry Collins and AJ Venter can speak first hand of the dominance of Beau and Palu in this area after they were both given a comprehensive lesson in pain.

Luke Burgess has been a revelation at scrum-half. His pace electric, decision making astute and ability to back himself provided the Tahs with some much needed spark. Perhaps the biggest difference he makes however is the basics of scrum-halfing. He gobbles all the shit ball that comes out the back of the scrum and serves up a golden platter for Kurtley. For me the highlight of his year was in attrocious conditions in Pretoria where a slipery ball was flying all over the place, yet he somehow managed to clean it up for Kurts to concentrate on distributing. Plus it's satisfying to take one back from the Brumbies. Josh who?

Much of our success this year has come in spite of poor kicking. I don't blame Kurtley for this however, in fact I think he's had a wonderful season. He seems to have learnt to do less when required, happy to get the forwards to run it up rather than go for the hero try every play. He's playing percentage rugby and growing each game into a fine distributor. I even think he'll turn into a fine kicker, he's just not there yet. I've maintained all along that letting Peter Hewat go with a year remaining on his contract was a mistake, I still don't know how but we've made the final!

Tom Carter is another who's efforts have been mostly under-rated though he's picked up some positive press in recent weeks. His hard running, solid defence and resiliance to injuries have provided a bankable inside centre that gets the job done.

Rob Horney, well what a champunisher. As the 2nd quickest guy in the country he manages to rush opposition defences and has put on some memorable hits on opposite numbers. Just last week he gave Francois injured ribs a real test, as well as smashing the Sharks 13 for a vital turnover that led to Lote's try.

Lote Tuqiri has had his best season ever. Always drawing in two tacklers and sometimes that's not enough. He's not scared to get involved in the dirty work, and has been a real leader amongst such a young backline. Richie McCaw, if you're reading please pull Lote's hair. Pump Up Lote.

Lachie Turner has had a mixed season. Some call it second season blues, while I'd argue he's just had some bad weeks while being mostly awesome. He's been much better since returning to the wing, I reckon his kicking out of hand has been a bit of a weakness at the back, however that'll improve with experience. Full marks for his payout on Waratah Jesus, was worth the price of admission. Funny f'ucker.

Sam Norton-Knight's return from injury - he's proved to be a reliable kicking option and reliever of pressure, as well as astute positional play at fullback. He's also provided spark at different times moving into flyhalf and mixing up the attacking patterns, and helped Kurtley defend that 10/12 channel when required.

A team is only ever as good as their bench, and in a competition as demanding as the Super 14. David Lyons, Timana Tahu, Beau Robinson, Will Caldwell, Brett Sheehan, Alfi Mafi, and Ben Jacobs have all played their part in getting us to the final.

Finally, Sir Les Kiss take a bow. You certainly get my vote for coach of the year. Our defensive structures have been superb all year and have most definately got us where we are today.

It may well be a fantasy world that I'm living in but I believe I can fly. I believe we can beat the Crusaders. Well, maybe I can fly. Damn it, I'm going to Christchurch to support the team! Go The Tahs!

Bugger Link, let's talk rugby

2008-05-22T11:27:00.003+10:00

With all the crap going on this week in the media you'd be forgiven for not knowing that the mighty NSW Waratahs are playing a must win semi-final on Saturday evening.

There have been many long running jokes about SMH's Chief Pie Eater, and while he's predictably in on the action it's not just him this time. It seems that the entire Australian media fraternity don't give a toss about the Waratah's best chance to take home the trophy to date, and are more interested in fuelling some sort of 'saga' about Link's career.

There's the usual boardroom shenanigans, but their fools anyway. We've got Eddie Jones weighing in, calls for an apology, and deadset I'm not making this up, opinions from Rugby League coaches being reported as News!

Les Kiss is leaving, John Connoly's taking over, no it's definately Chris Hickey, or Scott Johnson, oh, we're re-signing link, thanks for clearing that up.

Actually he's off to France, no Ireland, actually Munster, correction - Crusaders, I mean Blues. Maybe he'll just go back to being a town planner.

But don't worry, it's not a distraction. Personally, I'm with John O'Neill.

Bugger Link, lets talk Rugby.

All Hail the NSW Waratahs, the second greatest team in the hemisphere

2008-05-19T15:10:00.002+10:00

The MIGHTY NSW Waratahs have overcome a mountain of obstacles this year in order to finish 2nd on the Super 14 table. So that we can all appreciate the greatness of this team, I thought I'd go through some the challenges we've overcome this year.

Shit Draw
2008 is was our year for 6 home matches and 7 away matches, so it's an absolute tribute to the team to even make the finals with an away laden draw. Two of our home games being against 13th and 14th, who you'd fancy your chances away against. The worst part of our draw was weeks 12-14, with a trip to South Africa being immediately followed by a return to Queensland for a must win grudge match against our nemisis north of the border. Add to this our luggage was lost in Joberg (thanks to all those who donated to the appeal), and our preperation really couldn't have been any worse. Poor Queenslanders crying about us missing their sponsors do, boo f'ucking hoo.

Coaching Merry-go-round
After weeks of distraction and speculation, Ewen was sacked mid season. This was followed by many more weeks of speculation on his replacement and constant media harrassment of the players which appeared to galvanise the team into the force they are now. Everyone know's that Waratah Jesus will be the next coach anyway.

No Kicker
By far the most inexplicable decision by the Waratahs this year was releasing Peter Hewat from the final year of his contract without having a replacement. Hewat's form in the ARC was the catalyst for the Central Coast Rays to take the trophy, with his kicking out of hand and for poles being amongst the best in Australia. Sure Kurtley's tried hard and even has had some decent weeks (eg week 13 against the Stormers), but he's just a kid and would have benifited a lot more as Hewat's understudy this year - taking kicks through the season as circumstances allow but knowing that Hewat is there to fall back on. The issue was mostly covered up when SNK returned from injury, but the glaring hole persists if he goes off (or Link starts him on the bench again WTF!)

Bad Weather
This season the 'Tahs could really be called the rain makers. It seems everywhere we play thunderstorms follow. While you'd have to say our boys have played well in the wet, our lack of a kicker has really hurt us in this area (case in point Derek Hougard pushing us all over the field with his territorial kicking game). A true tribute to the pigs up front that we've stayed in these matches. The plethora of wet weather matches has been a significant factor in our low number of bonus point wins this season.

Unsettled backline
Disturbingly, our backline is still unsettled going into the semi's, with 13, 14 and 15 all up for grabs. I thought we had reached some consistency of selection going to South Africa, however for some reason Horne is on the outer and we seem to be bending over backwards to accommodate Cararro in the starting team. Sure he's big, but his positional play is lacking (see Stormers first try), and in leaving SNK out of the team we lose our one open play kicker.

Despite these obstacles, we've equalled our 2005 regular season as our best ever. The news gets even better as the Crusaders are suddenly looking beatable and there's a very real possibility that the final will be in Sydney vs the Hurricanes. 2008 has to be our best shot at the title yet.

Shit-hot defence
Our defensive effort this year has been remarkable. Of the 186 points scored against us this year, 34 were in one week against the Crusaders. We've the second best defensive record in the comp after the Crusaders, however bad weather doesn't lend itself to high scores by either side. Some of the pressure that we've withstood has been mirraculous - Les Kiss, take a bow. A shame we don't have a knighthood system in Australia as Les Kiss would be a sure thing.

Awesome Platform
Bill from QR was spot on when he said our forward pack have an awesome platform. The Dunning and BaxTAH have been on fire, Bennnn and Kepu have also been consistant along with TPN and Freier making an impact too. Three wins against the feed in the last two weeks is one stat that should concern the Sharks. It's not just the front row however, the entire pack have been awesome with great contributions from Aussie Dan, Dean Mumm scoring a few tries, and Rocky, Phil and Palu smashing everyone in site.

The possibility of losing Dan and Rocky at the end of the year hurts, and it's for this reason that 2008 is likely to be our best shot at the title for some time.

GO THE TAHS!

Sock shortage won't stop the migthy Tahs

2008-05-14T16:57:00.001+10:00

Yesterday's appeal for training clothes and equipment has led Waratah's management to offer there sincere thanks to the rugby public. They've even released a photo of yesterday's mufti-training, and I've managed to identify the pieces of clothing identified by the good folk over at www.GoTheTahs.com.

You'll notice from the picture that there is still a severe shortage of socks, with Sam Harris forced to run around in Peter Hughes Shoes unprotected. Harris will be fighting back the blisters tonight, and may also be refused entry to the RSL due to his lack of sockwork.

Be sure to dig deep into the sock draw tonight and do your bit for the Tah's march onwards to the finals.

Waratahs Clothing Appeal

2008-05-13T10:27:00.004+10:00

The Tahs have arrived back in Sydney, however 95% of their playing kit has failed to follow them. It's times like this that the fans can step up and really support the team, so dig deep into your rugby merchandise cupboard and donate whatever you can to help out the boys in light blue.

Donation bins have been installed at all major shopping centres (pictured), with team management specifically appealing for undergarments and toiletries. Lote has put in a special request for a bottle of Soul Glo.

I've already donated two of my Tahs' Jerseys (the third one has been given to my brother-in-law after a recent bet he lost), as well as some spare boxer shorts and three pairs of odd socks.

While appreciative of the public's generosity in the appeal to this point, there is a real dearth of XXXXL merchandise. Fortunately they made Morgs hand in his gear when he moved north last year so that's Bennnn covered, however at this stage the rest of the pack will be running around shirtless which could present some difficulty in getting a decent bind. It should be noted that our scrum is still expected to monster the ailing Reds pack.

Waratahs management have assured me personally that all borrowed gear will be signed and returned to the owners as soon as they find the missing bags last seen strapped to the roof of a Joberg taxi.

QR Reds Advert

2008-05-12T21:51:00.001+10:00

Thought it was time to edit the sh1thouse QR Reds advert that's currently doing the rounds on Foxtel..