tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18485768065717601822024-11-01T20:04:01.717+11:00Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.comBlogger120125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-872987174435966642018-10-31T11:47:00.001+11:002018-10-31T11:47:12.978+11:00

I wasn't blogging, but did manage to fire off a few quick letters to the Herald Sun (under a pseudonym of course). Why the 'Hun? I think because I tend to read it at work over lunch so I'd get a chance to respond promptly, whereas the Age gets taken home and read maybe days later making it too late to respond. Also, the 'Hun publishes so much drivel, I thought they'd generally be happy to

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-12395121165360709382018-10-31T11:18:00.002+11:002018-10-31T11:18:16.666+11:00

It's been awhile, but Ernst U., your guide to all that is good in life, is back in business... Hello!

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-69605057052543081942014-01-16T17:17:00.000+11:002014-01-16T17:17:51.920+11:00

Here's an excerpt from an email to a friend in England: "Yes, it is hot, very. I was ringing you about 2am, unable to sleep due to the heat.  I was sat in the backyard and it was still over 30degrees.  This is a glimpse of the future, so we (in Australia) better get used to it.  In a decade or so we'll probably get heatwaves like this every year and some years we'll get three

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-29094348289253243392013-07-17T16:33:00.000+10:002013-07-17T16:44:52.181+10:00

A broken weather record doesn't necessarily mean climate change, and records can get broken for many reasons; however if climate change was not involved you'd have as many cold records being set as hot ones, on average. That's not the way it is.  I'd hate to be considered an alarmist, and the first thing I'd say to a denialist is "I hope you're right", but it seems to me it's well time:

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-90704238224478387252013-07-17T16:32:00.002+10:002013-07-17T16:44:01.350+10:00

1. Go to Florida 2. Buy a gun 3. Goad your victim into throwing a punch at you 4. "Stand your ground" and blow your victim to bits 5. Walk away scot-free Note, for best results at point 5, ensure your victim has darker coloured skin than you.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-85390209711412217352012-12-28T15:35:00.000+11:002012-12-28T15:38:04.552+11:00

It's so frustrating listening to Red Cross on the radio complaining about their shortage of donors, when hey stop thousands of us from donating because we lived in the United Kingdom for six months during the period 1980-1996. Where do the British get their bloody donations from?

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-28277422151538936522012-11-16T22:39:00.000+11:002012-11-16T22:39:35.496+11:00

Being of a somewhat sensitive nature, I die a little inside each time I see someone destroying tea: the workmate adding milk to their cup before adding the not-quite-boiliing-for-OHS-reasons water and the ubiquitous yellow enveloped teabag that is defeated before it starts; the inner-city cafes that import Italian barristas to work vast espresso machines like demented church organs, they

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-21234231679948118902012-06-28T10:51:00.000+10:002012-06-28T10:52:02.255+10:00

As a Greens supporter, I implore you to pass the legislation in the Senate today. It is flawed legislation, but the impasse is worse. Sometimes politics demands compromise, sometimes it's distasteful. If you continue to side with Abbott and his crocodile tear shedding colleagues, can you really say you are better than them? You are certainly enabling them in driving more nails in the coffin

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-75268115255007408612011-08-19T11:08:00.006+10:002011-08-19T11:37:20.831+10:00

Boarking's back with a footy post! In celebration of Carlton fans wanting an Essendon win this weekend even more than the 'Dons fans do, Boarking Songwriting Services has been re-writing footy theme songs so that all fans can sing from the same song sheet. (For those not aware of the finals permutations: a Bombers win in Perth would be nice, but not necessary for stitching up a spot in the top

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-1349522909166873042011-05-25T18:53:00.002+10:002011-05-25T19:09:48.382+10:00

Go & sign this petition:_the_war_on_drugsFor best results, be listening to Peter Tosh whilst you do.Let sanity prevail.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-60559674228609297782011-03-25T12:16:00.008+11:002011-03-25T15:04:57.490+11:00

A bloke sent me one of those emails that do the rounds, perchance to raise a giggle. This one got me thinking:The fact that society functioned perfectly well with heaps of people quaffing addictive (but legal) drugs every day, would seem to suggest that it’s not the drugs, but the “War on drugs” that is the problem in our time. It’s not so much that the “cure” is worse than the “disease”, but

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-62675984414361241092011-02-20T15:20:00.003+11:002011-02-20T15:25:14.715+11:00

After a brief, arguably successful (we got on tele) political career, the blog is back on line.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-75639119176323925522011-01-09T13:36:00.000+11:002011-01-09T13:36:27.256+11:00

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-27779497079258909862010-08-19T20:41:00.002+10:002010-08-19T21:08:05.428+10:00

That's all you need to know.Actually, now I think about it, I quite like the Secular Party, because I'd quite like to have secularism; and I quite like the Sex Party, because I'd quite like to have sex.So feel free to vote for them.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-82754882817384270242010-07-11T17:58:00.007+10:002010-07-11T23:31:44.388+10:00

I've always wanted to start my own religion for the same reason as most people: to amass power & wealth. I've just been waiting for a decent theology to come together and here goes...A passing thought that Pauli the Oracle Octopus has what could be described as noodly appendages was, I quickly realised, a direct revelation from the Flying Spaghetti Monster who has spoken through me, Ernst U.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-28789405944710309702010-06-07T16:00:00.007+10:002010-06-07T18:04:26.065+10:00

I write this in Melbourne, in winter, but 30 hours ago I was on one of the world's finest beaches gazing on the white sand, the clear warm waters, surf on the reef, lush green island offshore. And, not least, onshore a bevy of beautiful bikini clad backpackers continually distracting the easily distracted such as myself. All this I was about to tear myself away from, to motorcyle back to the town

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-59653958699349912772010-04-15T22:35:00.004+10:002010-04-15T22:55:02.769+10:00

The following is based on a true story, and contains a made-up word, like any good-bad poem should:Emily, X-Ray technician------------------------Oh, Emily, Emily, Emily,You make my heart all tremor-ly.Your machine took a picture of my teeth,For the erudition of my dentist, Keith.You bid me to stay quite still,But my heart did what it will,That is to say, it was tremor-ly,For an X-ray tech called

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-81150678930805915842010-01-08T23:27:00.002+11:002010-01-08T23:31:44.624+11:00

I've decided to share some of my rare vinyl with the world, reliving the Eighties when I was young & enthusiasm flowed through me. And why not, it feels like a new decade although the purists have a strong but dismal arguement that the new decade starts next new year, a nostalgia hobby is good.Let's concentrate on the good old flexidiscs, because though there are many a song clip on Youtube

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-22777912334287713572009-11-27T14:55:00.003+11:002009-11-27T16:04:42.795+11:00

Thanks to the collusion of Australia's pig-shit-thick voters, we've walked ourselves into what is essentially a one-party state masquerading as a democracy. All we get to choose is which faction of the Libor Party (or is it the Laberals) gets to play government for the corporate masters.The dirtier elements of the corporate masters must be rubbing their hands with glee at how the CPRS (

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-59377781729894750472009-11-08T21:56:00.001+11:002009-11-08T21:59:19.941+11:00

give away your hard-earned here: http://au.movember.com/mospace/124621good onya'

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-10747520896682258792009-10-02T23:38:00.002+10:002009-10-02T23:57:34.855+10:00

On wednesday morning I woke to this text: "Hey boar did you hear about quake and tsunami in the samoas?"My phone failed to recognise the number, so it wasn't in my contacts, but the writer clearly knew my name and that I had a Samoan connection (I spent a couple of years around the millenium bring books to the Samoan masses)I replied: "I do now! thanks mystery caller!"And got the reply:

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-25399555310370770672009-09-23T23:02:00.003+10:002009-09-23T23:08:27.558+10:00

Your head says tip Geelong.But when I was taking in the washing at the weekend, I came to a point where what was left on the line were three vests: one red, one white & one black. It seems to me an omen from the footy gods, who've I've had dealings with before, so you best tip the Saints.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-83559402731015263192009-09-20T17:59:00.004+10:002009-09-20T18:24:09.467+10:00

as the polar bears smile their thanks,and the glaciers regrow,snows fall again on Kilamanjaro,Gaia sighs her relief,and......a cloud of smug becomes visible above Boarking Mansions!

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-68288879530969001702009-09-20T17:48:00.004+10:002009-09-20T17:59:42.975+10:00

I warned all my Collingwood Pie friends (I confess I do have some) not to watch the Preliminary Final. I'm sure they regret ignoring the man in the know, Ernest U.Followers of the game knew it was going to go pear shape when the coach tried to play mind games, always the last refuge of the desperate.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-35462480810663979742009-09-13T22:16:00.003+10:002009-09-13T22:26:54.480+10:00

Obviously, when you think about it, there is no point.We're all, creatures great & small, just filling in time between birth & death, in a universe doing much the same (I suspect).When you are doing alright, this is liberating.When you struggle in the dark night of your (non-existent) soul, this is no consolation.But you might as well go on with it, because you're a long time dead.And you

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0