tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18485768065717601822011-11-20T07:28:43.256+11:00Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.comBlogger112125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-75268115255007408612011-08-19T11:08:00.006+10:002011-08-19T11:37:20.831+10:002011-08-19T11:37:20.831+10:00

Boarking's back with a footy post! In celebration of Carlton fans wanting an Essendon win this weekend even more than the 'Dons fans do, Boarking Songwriting Services has been re-writing footy theme songs so that all fans can sing from the same song sheet. (For those not aware of the finals permutations: a Bombers win in Perth would be nice, but not necessary for stitching up a spot in the top

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-1349522909166873042011-05-25T18:53:00.002+10:002011-05-25T19:09:48.382+10:002011-05-25T19:09:48.382+10:00

Go & sign this petition:_the_war_on_drugsFor best results, be listening to Peter Tosh whilst you do.Let sanity prevail.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-60559674228609297782011-03-25T12:16:00.008+11:002011-03-25T15:04:57.490+11:002011-03-25T15:04:57.490+11:00

A bloke sent me one of those emails that do the rounds, perchance to raise a giggle. This one got me thinking:The fact that society functioned perfectly well with heaps of people quaffing addictive (but legal) drugs every day, would seem to suggest that it’s not the drugs, but the “War on drugs” that is the problem in our time. It’s not so much that the “cure” is worse than the “disease”, but

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-62675984414361241092011-02-20T15:20:00.003+11:002011-02-20T15:25:14.715+11:002011-02-20T15:25:14.715+11:00

After a brief, arguably successful (we got on tele) political career, the blog is back on line.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-75639119176323925522011-01-09T13:36:00.000+11:002011-01-09T13:36:27.256+11:002011-01-09T13:36:27.256+11:00

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-27779497079258909862010-08-19T20:41:00.002+10:002010-08-19T21:08:05.428+10:002010-08-19T21:08:05.428+10:00

That's all you need to know.Actually, now I think about it, I quite like the Secular Party, because I'd quite like to have secularism; and I quite like the Sex Party, because I'd quite like to have sex.So feel free to vote for them.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-82754882817384270242010-07-11T17:58:00.007+10:002010-07-11T23:31:44.388+10:002010-07-11T23:31:44.388+10:00

I've always wanted to start my own religion for the same reason as most people: to amass power & wealth. I've just been waiting for a decent theology to come together and here goes...A passing thought that Pauli the Oracle Octopus has what could be described as noodly appendages was, I quickly realised, a direct revelation from the Flying Spaghetti Monster who has spoken through me, Ernst U.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-28789405944710309702010-06-07T16:00:00.007+10:002010-06-07T18:04:26.065+10:002010-06-07T18:04:26.065+10:00

I write this in Melbourne, in winter, but 30 hours ago I was on one of the world's finest beaches gazing on the white sand, the clear warm waters, surf on the reef, lush green island offshore. And, not least, onshore a bevy of beautiful bikini clad backpackers continually distracting the easily distracted such as myself. All this I was about to tear myself away from, to motorcyle back to the town

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-59653958699349912772010-04-15T22:35:00.004+10:002010-04-15T22:55:02.769+10:002010-04-15T22:55:02.769+10:00

The following is based on a true story, and contains a made-up word, like any good-bad poem should:Emily, X-Ray technician------------------------Oh, Emily, Emily, Emily,You make my heart all tremor-ly.Your machine took a picture of my teeth,For the erudition of my dentist, Keith.You bid me to stay quite still,But my heart did what it will,That is to say, it was tremor-ly,For an X-ray tech called

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-81150678930805915842010-01-08T23:27:00.002+11:002010-01-08T23:31:44.624+11:002010-01-08T23:31:44.624+11:00

I've decided to share some of my rare vinyl with the world, reliving the Eighties when I was young & enthusiasm flowed through me. And why not, it feels like a new decade although the purists have a strong but dismal arguement that the new decade starts next new year, a nostalgia hobby is good.Let's concentrate on the good old flexidiscs, because though there are many a song clip on Youtube

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-22777912334287713572009-11-27T14:55:00.003+11:002009-11-27T16:04:42.795+11:002009-11-27T16:04:42.795+11:00

Thanks to the collusion of Australia's pig-shit-thick voters, we've walked ourselves into what is essentially a one-party state masquerading as a democracy. All we get to choose is which faction of the Libor Party (or is it the Laberals) gets to play government for the corporate masters.The dirtier elements of the corporate masters must be rubbing their hands with glee at how the CPRS (

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-59377781729894750472009-11-08T21:56:00.001+11:002009-11-08T21:59:19.941+11:002009-11-08T21:59:19.941+11:00

give away your hard-earned here: http://au.movember.com/mospace/124621good onya'

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-10747520896682258792009-10-02T23:38:00.002+10:002009-10-02T23:57:34.855+10:002009-10-02T23:57:34.855+10:00

On wednesday morning I woke to this text: "Hey boar did you hear about quake and tsunami in the samoas?"My phone failed to recognise the number, so it wasn't in my contacts, but the writer clearly knew my name and that I had a Samoan connection (I spent a couple of years around the millenium bring books to the Samoan masses)I replied: "I do now! thanks mystery caller!"And got the reply:

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-25399555310370770672009-09-23T23:02:00.003+10:002009-09-23T23:08:27.558+10:002009-09-23T23:08:27.558+10:00

Your head says tip Geelong.But when I was taking in the washing at the weekend, I came to a point where what was left on the line were three vests: one red, one white & one black. It seems to me an omen from the footy gods, who've I've had dealings with before, so you best tip the Saints.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-83559402731015263192009-09-20T17:59:00.004+10:002009-09-20T18:24:09.467+10:002009-09-20T18:24:09.467+10:00

as the polar bears smile their thanks,and the glaciers regrow,snows fall again on Kilamanjaro,Gaia sighs her relief,and......a cloud of smug becomes visible above Boarking Mansions!

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-68288879530969001702009-09-20T17:48:00.004+10:002009-09-20T17:59:42.975+10:002009-09-20T17:59:42.975+10:00

I warned all my Collingwood Pie friends (I confess I do have some) not to watch the Preliminary Final. I'm sure they regret ignoring the man in the know, Ernest U.Followers of the game knew it was going to go pear shape when the coach tried to play mind games, always the last refuge of the desperate.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-35462480810663979742009-09-13T22:16:00.003+10:002009-09-13T22:26:54.480+10:002009-09-13T22:26:54.480+10:00

Obviously, when you think about it, there is no point.We're all, creatures great & small, just filling in time between birth & death, in a universe doing much the same (I suspect).When you are doing alright, this is liberating.When you struggle in the dark night of your (non-existent) soul, this is no consolation.But you might as well go on with it, because you're a long time dead.And you might

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-61258686272207129912009-09-07T21:47:00.001+10:002009-09-07T22:47:38.763+10:002009-09-07T22:47:38.763+10:00

At the pool after work, I go for my crook neck, I stay too long in the spa, I get a bit light headed. I sit on the side, half dressed, waiting to recover, waiting for my feet to dry and I remember this lovely woman that got on my carriage last Saturday arvo.She got on at Antsey or Brunswick, or somewhere close; it's not really that important but perhaps it is, all the best people live in

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-75524104142615159402009-08-30T13:06:00.003+10:002009-08-30T13:37:36.363+10:002009-08-30T13:37:36.363+10:00

Forget all this talk about Adelaide being really good, Carlton were doing alright until they realised that Essendon, their Nemesis, were going to win and therefore Carlton would have the dubious pleasure of hosting the 'dons in a home final. At that point, Carlton stopped, "tanked" in the preferred vernacular, prepared to gamble on losing a home final just to avoid the Bombers...You soft blue

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-27067517198546269752009-07-04T16:01:00.003+10:002009-07-04T16:13:15.855+10:002009-07-04T16:13:15.855+10:00

Here's a question I'm often asked: "Ernst, How good is footy?"Last night, tired & emotional at the 'G, I had an answer:"Not that good!"One shocking quarter and big team wide dose of the kicking yips did all the damage.I found some consolations:*The Dons are young and the lesson will do us good*The Pies are actually pretty good, so not too much shame in losing*Didak is in my fantasy footy team,But

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-315437818126272692009-06-20T15:35:00.002+10:002009-06-20T15:41:57.433+10:002009-06-20T15:41:57.433+10:00

I did, but that's because I made it. If you did too, and you are not me, that would indicate that the new title is untrue. In fact, even if you didn't notice, but you are reading this, and you are not me, then that would indicate that the new title is still untrue. And that makes me happy.However, barring the odd wonderful exception that is you, I know the title is broadly true.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-56604466731456969942009-06-10T21:37:00.006+10:002009-06-10T21:52:19.107+10:002009-06-10T21:52:19.107+10:00

When the last star dies, when entropy and expansion have wrought the death of the universe; it will still be warmer than Boarking Mansions tonight.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-62170704626901896982009-05-09T14:24:00.002+10:002009-05-09T15:28:53.426+10:002009-05-09T15:28:53.426+10:00

All that stuff yesterday about Christians and lions, about feeling like a Melbourne fan, and lottery winning odds, not to mention the tipping against my own team; all a ploy, to tease and goad the footy gods into delivering for the 'dons. I'm glad they fell for it, I know I did.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-11004849172676795602009-05-08T10:33:00.003+10:002009-05-08T10:46:53.651+10:002009-05-08T10:46:53.651+10:00

We're off to the Colosseum tonight to see the Christians take on the lions. I'm cheering on the Christians, but I'm not tipping them.Actually, I'm going to the footy, as you might have guessed. I was using metaphor. But it's true that the bookies are paying similar odd on Essendon as they used to pay on the Christians (probably), so the metaphor would appear apt.It's not impossible that

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1848576806571760182.post-64120904689934837772009-05-05T14:21:00.002+10:002009-05-05T14:34:23.898+10:002009-05-05T14:34:23.898+10:00

There is no other explanation for Fev's post-er.Sometimes there is a little magic even in just listening to footy: Fevola marks 15 out, 45 angle. It's all over, Carlton have done what Essendon did a week before. The commentators go quiet as he takes the kick, leaving the listener with the crowd... We hear the roar waxing, but it falters then wanes, the crowd like one wounded, bewildered animal.

Ernsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00465867254639917996noreply@blogger.com0