Bombshell BLISS

A Year of Worry - NOT

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Sun, 06 May 2012 12:05:00 +0000

So this could indeed be the year of worry. Oy! I hate that.

I have a kid on his way to Afghanistan. His fifth deployment.

I also have a 16 year old kid headed to Austria. FOR A WHOLE YEAR....BY HERSELF. Yeah, yeah, yeah, wonderful opportunity and all that.

I also have a kid who has just married. A new life together. I want to see them so blissfully happy!

I also have my two youngest, twins, who have just launched their teen years. Yeah baby....hold on.

It's no wonder really...that I have to use so much hair coloring.

So how does one cope with this parenting gig?

Yeah, not effective.

I suspect this year is going to be a doozie. Who knows what it will bring. All I know is it will bring change....to each of my children....to me too. Hold on people. We are in for quite the ride.

Must be why the Japanese word for Contentment is so complicated.....

Smart Cats & Dumb Dogs?

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 18:54:00 +0000

My cat watched the first night of the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show.

The second night she sat and watched the entire thing without even dozing.

I could hear her thinking….

“Dumb dogs work too hard”.

Yeah.....This Boat Has Righted Itself.

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 22:02:00 +0000

So I’ve been back to work for about four months. This after being unemployed for two years.

During those two years, I danced with homelessness, breast cancer, and a broken self-esteem.

Through it all my children and I laughed.

We persevered.

The children and I decided that we would take the trip of a lifetime if we survived this chapter intact.

Yeah, we had a goooooood time.

Finals Week

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 01:10:00 +0000

Nuff Said

Perspective Baby!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 01:19:00 +0000

So my 16 year old daughter was filled with teenaged angst this morning. Horrible thing teenaged angst….ok, I just like saying teenaged ANGST. Sounds sexy somehow.

Anyhoo, conversation went something like this.

FooFoo: I just hate school

Me: No, I think you hate the idea that you made unwise decisions and now you have to live with the consequences of two "D's". We could homeschool you. You could be home alone all day, every day with the cats. You could be the youngest cat lady on the planet.

A look of horror began to spread on her face…..

FooFoo: That’s not what I meant. I have to have my social time.

Me: Uh huh, which leads us back to the living with your consequences.

FooFoo: Life is just so hard right now.

Me: Hard? Hard is having a rash under your right boob and not being able to scratch it at work. Now that's hard.

The look of horror deepened on her face, actually she looked like she was in pain…..

Me: Now you’ll have something else to think about all day long besides your horrible life. See? It’s all in perspective. In fact, I think as you step out of the car I’ll yell, “Think of my boob”.

Let’s just say, she got out of the car in record time. She’ll thank me when she’s older.

I'M BAAAAAAAK

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 02:13:00 +0000

I miss blogging. There, I said it. Think I'll start again. I think I should tell the story of my co-workers and our night out drinking. Wait....we swore to keep our most embarassing stories a secret. HA! They don't know me very well yet.

A Note from Job Search Hell

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 19:19:00 +0000

So here we are.... I've been unemployed two years as of August 28th, sent out over 1000 resumes, and have attended some form of over 100 interviews. I have but one thing to say....

While I have been able to support myself with my writing, unemployment, and the occasional throwing myself to the mercy of former CEO's I've worked for....I. WANT. A. JOB! My job. My desk. My tasks and duties. My pens. My computer.

I vacillate between BLISS and sheer panic. Learning to be ''in the moment'' has become a necessity and not just a lofty goal. Helpful hint: Chest pain from anxiety and chest pain from a heart attack are eerily similar. Learned that from a recent ER visit.

Yeah....forging ahead here. Let's look at a picture of kittens because....well....it calms us all down...right?...RIGHT?....RIGHT!!?!

What Do You Wish to Begin?

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Wed, 08 Jun 2011 17:54:00 +0000

Over at Jamie Ridler Studios, it's Wish Casting Wednesday. I love it because it forces me to stop and breath and think. I'm generally not good at any of those things. Think butterfly on crack.

Today's question is, "What Do You Wish to Begin".

How about....I don't know. For the first time in my life, I truly feel like things are right with the world. While there is still tension from outside forces beyond my control, my home is as it should be...peaceful. My children, happy...as it should be.

I sat around the house yesterday and just looked. Thinking, "What does the house need"? The answer was nothing really. All is at rest. This past two years has been appallingly difficult and yet God and his great big Universe have provided....in abundance.

I suppose I would like to begin a job. Yeah. Let's do that. I'm tired of "pulling it together" every month to make ends meet. I'm an "earn my paycheck so that my brain power can go to playing and creating on the weekend" kind of gal. Yeah....that's what I need to begin.

Come join us.... http://jamieridlerstudios.ca/.

Note to Self: Read Directions First!

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Wed, 08 Jun 2011 00:29:00 +0000

So the other day....

In my need to feel relaxed....

I decided to give myself a facial.....

I used some new stuff....

After putting it on, I read the directions....

"For Men Only" it said....

How would this stuff know that I'm not a man I pondered....

My skin started to burn....

Yeah....apparently it knew cause it took almost two days for my skin to simmer down....

And yes, my kids thought it was hysterical.

I'm Almost FREE

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Sat, 04 Jun 2011 20:39:00 +0000

Some of you have been following me since I started blogging in 2007. I orginally started so I would have an outlet to process what had happened to me in my personal relationships. I needed a way to vent healing from narcissistic relationships and a place where I could work though my family of orgin issues.

After I had moved on, blogging became a fun way to just "be". I'd made friends with so many of you. It just made sense to keep going.

Two years ago, I was let go from my job that I loved. My boss let me go to make room for an "old friend". I'd been told stories about her, but my general reaction was always whatever. Until my boss told me one Thursday how valuable I was to the company in answer to the question, "Is my job at risk". He emphasized that my job was secure.

It was shocking that the VERY NEXT DAY, he laid me off with the explaination that he wasn't ready to deal with it the day before.

Would have been ok if I hadn't had a job offer the day before that I'd let go of because of his answer. Ahem.

That boss is still steamed that I blogged even though the only time I ever blogged about my job was to say how much I loved my job and I never once mentioned his company name.

Even so, I received papers stating that I couldn't formally blog for two years. Time is almost up.

I did the right thing. I loved my job. I loved the company I worked for even though it was a tough place to work. And still it bit me in the butt.

I haven't blogged in a long time. Boy...do I have a lot to say.

Flash Mob Friday Peeps! Enjoy!

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Fri, 20 May 2011 18:38:00 +0000

I'm So Ready for the Zombies

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Sat, 14 May 2011 19:10:00 +0000

Well Mother's Day has come and gone. This one was particularily delightful because my oldest son and my daughter-in-love are finally home from Germany with my new grandbaby. I swear that kid's cheeks are going to get kissed off any minute now.

A little history....

I've always been the peace type parent. It made me uncomfortable for my children to play with guns much less having one in the house. Amazingly enough they could always make a gun out of anything....my oldest made one out of a tampon when he was three.

The kid grew up to be a wonderful man and to have a career in the military. I suppose it's all good.

So this Mother's Day, I did something out of the ordinary even for me.

Yeah that last picture is me.....with a zombie. I had a great time and have once again realized....I am so weird.

Simple Things Are the Best

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Wed, 16 Mar 2011 02:08:00 +0000

Sometimes....when all hell is breaking loose all over the world.... sometimes.... it's important to just reflect and ponder.... Watching my children delight in reaching their goals...

Enjoying a seasonal something special....

Simply praying for Japan.... because each person there lost their simple lives in a moment.

Beauty of the Storm

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 20:01:00 +0000

I love this picture. It's been one of my favorites for years. I wish I could give credit to the artist. I would buy everything I could get my hands on.

I love this picture because she is moving towards the new day. The storm is coming to an end. And yet, she is still being whipped by the wind and the debris is still a flurry. Is she looking back with regret? With sadness? With a sense of accomplishment?
I feel that I am facing the new day and yet I'm still dealing with the debris. I still look back. With all sadness as well as accomplishment. I see the new day dawning. I see the storm leaving.

I'm tired. Not sure how else to describe it.

I'm a Ninja!...or Having a Mid-Life Crisis.

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Sun, 20 Feb 2011 00:14:00 +0000

Seriously....I'm not sure which, but I'm just so darn happy. I'm happy to still be alive. Cancer will do that to you. Happy to have well-adjusted children. Who should have many more problems than they do. Happy to be at peace with myself and my life decisions. Yeah, how many can truly say that.

Is everything good? Heck no. I still need a job. I'm still not cancer free. I'm still living in a situation that I'd give anything to be out of.....but I'm content. Happy. Something I've pursued for years and feel that in the midst of the turmoil I seem to have found it.

I've gone back to yoga. Big part of it. There is something about forcing yourself to do nothing but focus on relaxing twice a week. What a difference it has made.

I'm changing my name....legally. Why? Several reasons.

1. I worked a job years ago that had three "Jeanette"s working for them. I became Jlynn because my name is actually Jeanette Lynn. I liked that name and looking back, I wish I'd kept it. So I'm going back. In fact, I'm changing it legally.

2. I hate the tone that my ex uses when he says Jeanette. It has a venom to it. I don't like it. Pithy and immature on my part to take offense I'm sure, but I want something new.

3. I wanted to go back to my maiden name when I divorced. One of my children asked me to keep my married name so I did. He no longer sees us having the same name as important. So I'm going back to my maiden name too.

4. A new name feels fresh, the same way that turning 50 feels fresh. I am pursuing that which brings me BLISS much as I always have, but something has changed. The pursuit now has a sense of abandon. I no longer care what others think....with the exception of my children.

5. I've shared my name change with a few select friends who have been overwhelmingly supportive and have even expressed that my new name more appropriately reflects my personality. I don't know why that makes me smile, but it does.

So there you go.....is it a Mid-Life Crisis? Yup, and I wear it proudly....like a Ninja!

50 Women Over 50 - Jamie Lee Curtis

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Thu, 23 Dec 2010 00:23:00 +0000

Ok troops! First of all, I can't believe I still have followers after six months in hiding. Thanks for waiting patiently. Then to log on and see comments plus a bunch of emails of encouragement and telling me that you had missed me...well...it made me cry. Thanks for that!

So I'm turning 50 in February. I am excited about it. I am looking forward to it so much I do believe people are questioning my sanity. I love my life even with all the stupid that seems to hit me on a daily basis. I've been told that I have a great capacity for happiness. Pretty good complement I think although I truly believe the happiest people in the world are usually the ones who have been run over by a truck....repeatedly. If that is the case, I am delirious with happy!

In celebration of my turning 50, I want to shine a light on women over 50 who rather than becoming old crones, have gone on to accomplish more and be deliriously happy themselves.

Jamie Lee Curtis is first up.

This women first became one of my heros when she debuted in the movie Halloween when I was in college. Scared me to death which is pretty hard to do.

I've spent years watching her career and grew to actually love her when in her thirties she announced that she intended to grow old with grace and would never have plastic surgery.

Can you imagine? I can remember her on Oprah talking about it and everyone in the audience was shocked.

She has gone on to many other roles and now tends to play the mom usually with a comic flare. Since I live the role of mom with comic flare....well.... what can I say.

I think she is beautiful. That comic thing just adds to the dimension of a woman who is living life to the fullest no matter what stage she is in. I love that!

She has gone on to become a philanthropist supporting some incredibly worthy causes.

She has married and mothered children.

And she looks forward.....always.

I want to live my life always looking forward. I want to do good things in the world and raise happy children.

The best part of this over 50 woman is that Jamie Lee wears her wrinkles with pride.

If that isn't a role model, I don't know what is.

Yeah.....it's time

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 02:43:00 +0000

Time to start blogging again.

I'm getting ready to turn 50 years old. I've been told that people who are over 50 become more of who they are and tend to lose their filter. Yeah, that ought to be fun.

I haven't blogged in six months. In that time....

I've had a grandson. Welcome Remington Danger.

I've been diagnosed with cancer. Fight on I say.

I've lived with my ex-husband for financial reasons. Ahem.

And I've loved life more than ever.

Stand by....more drivel is on the way.

July Full Moon Dream Boards

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Sun, 25 Jul 2010 06:31:00 +0000

I love the Full Moon. Regardless of what you believe, there is just something about a great, big full moon that makes me want to dream dreams.

Head over to Jaime's place if you want to participate. Here's the link.... http://jamieridlerstudios.ca/

BLISS - Swedish

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 06:25:00 +0000

It’s been awhile since I’ve explored BLISS. Perhaps it’s the fact that my family has taken a left turn into Crapsville or the reality that this is the second year for the same word and I’ve never done that before. (I choose one word a year to explore in as many ways as I can. Last year it was BLISS and I’ve continued the exploration even now.)

So tonight I had some “me” time and I got bored and began pondering BLISS yet again.

My daughter has a friend. We’ll call her Sweet E.

Sweet E and FooFoo are pretty much inseparable. They go to church together. They spend tons of time together at both houses. They both call me mom and quite frankly, Sweet E is just as much a part of our family as FooFoo.

This weekend, Sweet E is away. My daughter and her friend have made a pact that they will text a picture every hour no matter what they are doing at the moment. There have been some pretty funny ones going back and forth.

Sweet E is Swedish. She speaks the language fluently and FooFoo has picked some up just by being in their home. For instance, sometimes I say “Kiss, Kiss” to my children as they are running by. Last week, my daughter replied, “Puss, puss”. Stopped me in my tracks, but apparently that is “Kiss, Kiss” in Swedish.

I love Swedish. It’s a happy language and I can’t help but smile every time I hear it spoken. It is light and joyful.

There are three words in Swedish for BLISS. I always find it interesting that BLISS in English has multiple meanings but only one word. No wonder it’s so hard to learn.

Lycksalighet means nothing more than BLISS. It’s a noun and has no other meaning. I searched quite a bit and really couldn’t find an alternative meaning. BLISS meaning so many different things to different people, a simple meaning of BLISS wasn’t enough. Anyway, this didn’t help my never ending search.

Lycka is also a noun meaning BLISS. This word has other meanings as well.

happiness,
luck
success
chance
mercy
fortune

Which makes me wonder, if BLISS that is made of chance, fortune, and luck is that really a BLISS that should be pursued. I mean, wouldn’t that be a BLISS that just falls in my lap at some point without any effort on my part? I want a tangible BLISS. I want to feel it and know that it is real. I want to pursue BLISS with all my heart.

The Swedes have one more definition of BLISS….

Salighet, also a noun for BLISS but with the further definition of

glory
blessedness
beatitude

Now that sounds like a BLISS that is related to a spiritual pursuit, although I may be pushing that definition for my own needs.

What I know for sure is that when FooFoo and Sweet E are together, there is BLISS in every way. They delight in each other and they care deeply about the comings and goings in each of their lives.

It is BLISS to find a good friend. I’ve been blessed to have several in my life. I am very thankful to good friends who buy into my life on a deep level. They pour BLISS into my life often.

It’s the phone calls from the best friend I’ve ever had, Ann, who has the ability to make me laugh like no other. It’s the chattering away the evening with my friends AD and Kyra. It’s the simple love of people who have been there to listen and encourage for years like my friends, Sarah, Sue, Janice, Pam, and Tracy. It’s the friends that make me stretch and grow and call me on it when I feel sorry for myself a bit too much like Mary and Jo.

BLISS can be the simple reaching out to enjoy another person. BLISS can be the willingness to accept that someone is reaching out to me. The back and forth of a delightful intimacy that is just two friends connecting.

I don’t know if all Swedes are like that, but I know two 14 year old girls who have it down. BLISS.

The Last Person on the Planet to See

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 00:41:00 +0000

My name is Jeanette and I've never seen LOST. There, I said it.

Sooooo, I have an opportunity here to watch the whole thing from the beginning and I'm going to.....or at least try. Stay tuned. If I don't get it, I may need answers. Just sayn'

Flash Mob Friday's Tribute to Seattle

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 04:27:00 +0000

Doncha know I love Seattle! I suppose I could honor my area of the country by sharing the normal that goes on here....but that wouldn't be near as much fun.

Seattle is home and we know how to do flash mobs. The organizers post an invite on Facebook. Then they post the teaching videos on YouTube so everyone can learn the dance. Then they hold five or so in person rehearsals. Then they go to several sites in the city. It's open to anyone who wants to participate. Always fun!

And of course in Seattle we have our annual Zombie Walk. Yes, I have several friends who participated this year....

We can't end this tribute to Seattle without sharing the Solstice Parade 2010. Seattle's tribute to summer....oh...and yes...ahem...they are naked. In the old days the cops would chase them down the street which was just as much fun. Now the cops don't even bother to come.

Our summer's are short here, we have to pack a whole lotta fun in a very short time. Come for a visit. We promise to be "normal" if that would make you more comfortable. Just sayn'

Even the Whales are Unhappy with BP

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 00:26:00 +0000

Have you seen this? No injuries to the whale or the boat, but how scary is that! I'll add the link so you can see more pictures if you like....

http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Whale-wallops-yacht-South-Africa/ss/events/sc/072110jumpingwhale

Seriously Cranky

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 08:25:00 +0000

So I am seriously cranky.

I suppose I could blame the fact that August will mark my one year of being unemployed. While I have documented ENDLESSLY my wanderings through the various "systems" and my disappointment in said systems, I have actually loved being home daily with my children.

I suppose I could blame the fact that I've gained thirty pounds this year when I could have been working out constantly, although I've gotten more exercise than I've gotten in years.

I suppose it's because I've listened to stories of abuse for almost six months now and am having a terrible time not internalizing them. Writing my book has become agonizing at times.

Whatever.

So I'll leave you with a couple of pictures around our town.....

First up....this is the sculpture outside the Unemployment Security Office....SERIOUSLY.

This next picture goes to prove the economy is bad as this is our local cemetery.

Persevering on....

An Authentic Life

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 04:38:00 +0000

I love this picture. While screaming Authentic Life, that woman looks terrible. I look like her in so many ways right now. I'm not sleeping well and quite frankly, those dark circles around her eyes are very accurate. Funny, but accurate.

An authentic life...being true to one's own personality, spirit, or character. Living in simplicity because there is no facade. Staying true to what matters most.

For the last ten years, I have wanted to live an authentic life. When I turned forty, I was dealing with some really ugly things in my marriage. I was holding tight to my religious beliefs, but at the same time having a terrible time justifying the suffering that was going on....for the both of us.

I've never talked about why I ended my marriage except with my pastor at the time. Back then, his opinion mattered to me. In some ways, it still does but it is more as a friend than as an authority in my life these days.

When I turned forty, I spoke to him about ending my marriage and he told me that I had biblical grounds to do so. At 43, I finally did. It was brutal. My poor ex-husband spoke untruths to anyone who would listen. I kept my mouth shut. My pastor telling me not to speak out. I never did. He told me to walk in grace. I learned to do just that.

I knew that ending my marriage was something that needed to be done. And while he doesn't agree, I believe that in many ways it was something that needed to happen for my ex-husband too. He coped as best he could. Perhaps I should have defended myself, but I'm glad I didn't for so many reasons.

Since then, I've sought to learn who I am, what I need, what my bliss is....what exactly is my authentic life. A year ago, I was well on my way to BLISS.

I am at a baseline place tonight.

And still, I feel hope. So much hope. This whole year has been about being on the cusp of something new. I'm ready. The children are ready. It's exciting. An authentic life. It is happening now.

Twenty Years and Counting! TWENTY YEARS!

noreply@blogger.com (Bombshell BLISS) — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 15:20:00 +0000

Remington Nathaniel is 20 years old today. This kid, he makes me smile. He is so smart. Gifted Smart. He works full-time, he goes to school full-time. But I'm going to share some things that you probably don't know about our Remy.

The day he decided to be born. I was home alone. Contractions started and because my first labor had been 14+ hours, I decided to take a shower. While in the shower, my water broke.

I decided to drive myself to the hospital, pulling over for every contraction. Yes, twenty years ago, I wasn't very smart.

I drove into the emergency room bay of the hospital where I worked. I was in really hard labor at this point. One of the male nurses, who was my friend, helped me into a wheelchair while stating, "I don't like to do babies. You will wait until we get you to OB right?"

Needless to say, Remy was born forty minutes from the moment I felt my first contraction. Thank goodness my doctor's partner was there delivering another baby or I would have done that on my own too.

And that, my friends, is how this man goes through life. He forges ahead no matter what.

When he was a preschooler, his babysitter named him The Reminator. Apparently he was always on some kind of search and destroy mission. The name has stuck to this day, much to his annoyance.

He loves well done scary movies. He is the one person who can talk me into staying up all night to watch zombie movies.
He is fiercely loyal to family, to friends.

But mostly, he's my sweet, beautiful baby who has...from the moment he was born...warmed my heart to the point of bursting. He is someone I enjoy immensely and I'm so very, incredibly, proud of the man he is choosing to be.

Happy 20th Birthday Remy!

When the Zombies attack, I'll be right there with ya!