Boom Bab Lala

Bye 2011. You have been a great year.

2011-12-27T11:50:00.008+08:00

It's time to countdown to the New Year!

2011 - it was a good year for me.

We gave out red packets this year because we were married. It was fun. If you don't think how much money goes into these little red packets, you actually get a little kick out of picking nice, cute red packets to give away.

I queued for bak-kwa. Yes, I fucking did. Jay was about 3 months plus old. It was raining. I carried him and queued for Lim Chee Guan bak-kwa at Chinatown for a loooooong time.

I went to Chinatown with Mum on CNY's eve after swearing 98651357 times that I will not set foot there during CNY. There was a little I-wanna-kill-you incident with an uncle who was selling flowers but that's another story for another day.

The days at BMW were filled with many car launches and events after I went back to work when my maternity leave ended. All these events and socializing somehow helped to remind me that one's social life does not die when one becomes a Mum. Phew.

And Jay turned One. Oh yes, the little one is One! He has gone from baby that does not move to a baby that is trying to talk, walk and act like he is five.

Then I had a great offer from my ex-boss. And came back to my ex-agency. It's great being back. It feels like I am back home. Enough said.

Sea Cucumber announced that she is getting married next year. Biggest news of the century la. They have been together for more than a decade!

I met up with not only my girls but also a girlfriend that has been in Oz for many, many years. Another girlfriend whom we haven't seen in ages joined in the dinner. It's like a huge reunion!

Then I received the best Christmas pressie from Sea Cucumber! Super love the Hello Kitty casing can? Woooooooooo!

So, as I wave goodbye to 2011 and welcome 2012, I would like to thank everyone who have somehow played a part in my life this year. 2011 was great and hopefully 2012 will be better!

Managing Expectations - in a marriage

2011-01-07T20:41:00.003+08:00

Someone once told me - Marriage is not about having any (more) expectations. It's about managing expectations - manage your own expectations of your partner.

I stubbornly turned a deaf ear to that advice. And now I think it is true.

A girlfriend (a fellow Libran) wrote : "And I don't think fate is destiny, it's in our own hands. I don't own people and people don't own me. Marriage can have many phrase, it's just whether I want to step out."

Clearly, not only has she reached the stage where she can manage her own expectations; she has come to a point where she no longer let her heart rules her head.

I wonder, at what point does one realise that she has to manage her expectations. Isn't managing expectations the point where you no longer expect the other to do anymore things for you because you know it didn't happen, it's not happening now and it will never happen? And what happens after one learns how to manage expectations?

My Pride & Joy

2010-12-27T20:14:00.009+08:00

MIA - not. I went to give birth. ^_^My country gives money for people that pops babies. So why not take the money if I can? 4K is not a small amount.....

And as a mum now, I finally understand why people say that kids are every parent's pride and joy. Whenever the world disappoints me, I will take a look at Jay and he will make me feel happy. It's a comfort to know that no matter how fucked up the world is, there is still a little thing that is so innocent. And of course, I feel damn proud whenever I look at his chubby face (and legs....and arms). *grins*

So, here goes......Presenting my little bundle of joy who made his grand entrance to this world on 29 October 2010 : Jay Ang

Freshly pulled out from inside of me...see the hair is still messy?

With Great-Grandma

With Grandma - who dotes on him to death...

Caught with his cheeky smile at three weeks old!

I dance Para Para dance for you!

Oooohhhh.....

People say we have the same eyes but I am quite sure I don't glare at people like him!

Neh neh pok!

Actually, the neh neh is not the focus but his new hairstyle.

First Christmas at Pan Pacific Hotel

Speechless about this....Jay Jay wants to sleep but I want to bathe him so he did this - sleep while I bathe him. -.-ll

The Tribal Fighting Fish

2010-12-18T04:44:00.002+08:00

Why a fighting fish?

Have you ever seen a fighting fish? It fights. Till the very end. It retains it's beauty and glory till it's very end. It never says die and no matter what destiny has for them, they defy it. It will never say okay and accept what fate has in store for it.

Tribal? Well, all my three tattoos are of tribal designs so it has to be a tribal.

I have learnt from many past experiences that it's up to oneself to protect herself.

A fighting fish will always remind me that no matter what fate has in store for me, it's up to me to say okay or FUCK YOU, MOTHER FUCKER.

Disappointed. Utterly.

2010-10-17T00:01:00.004+08:00

It doesn't take much. Really.

To know how much you are worth to someone.

The feeling of always being the short-changed one sucks.

And it sucks even more when one is short-changed and the realization that one was never important either. You are here just because you happen to be at the right place at the wrong time.

It doesn't take much either - to be disappointed and to eventually hit the point of "I don't give a fuck anymore".

After all, when people promise you things and go back on their words too many times, one will eventually give up believing. No?

The name game

2010-08-08T22:21:00.005+08:00

DoRAYmon told me to think of names for the baby. So I came up with :

- Ang Ku Kueh (nice to eat mah)
- Ang Gong Gong (the name power can? can ward off evil.)
- Ang Ang Ang (the correct way to pronounce this is to sing it like the Doraemon song)

DoRAYmon said No to all the names. So I gave up and told him to go think of one himself.
He is smarter. He is dumping it on the fortune teller. When the baby is born, he is going to bring the eight characters to the fortune teller to get a name. Win lor.

Then he said maybe we can think of Christian names. So, I came up with :

- Lucas (Ray called it Lu-kar-ching) -.-
- Matthias (Ray cannot pronounce the name)
- Jay (think Jay Chou. Ray of course said no)

So, now back to square one. No name. Bleah.

Because I can and I will

2010-07-27T21:21:00.000+08:00

Because I have done it before,
And I know I can do it,
I can and I will do it a second time if I have to.

You can chose not to prioritize,
And chose not to respect,
And I will do the same.

Except you didn't know me well then.
Neither do you know me well enough now.
When I switch off and turn around,
I walk and I do not turn back.

You can repeat a mistake another make.
Except you should know I do not give second chances.
No matter who, no matter what,
No second chances.

You had two choices.
You chose A so don't ask for B when your decision is fucked.
You chose and you shall bear the consequences.

And like I always said,
Too late - the damage is done.
Don't bother trying anymore.
Even if I can, I will not turn around cos there is no point in saying Sorry and making amends.

Kick, baby, kick!

2010-07-11T21:21:00.000+08:00

I never knew how amazing being pregnant was till I felt my belly moved big time.

It was almost twenty weeks into the pregnancy before I felt the baby kick. But the kick was so strong that Ray can feel tremors when he puts his hand on my belly. What followed after that was magical and at times, amusing.

Ray probably felt more excited than me from the first time he saw the foetus on the screen at the doctor's clinic. It was well, a foetus to me but he found it very amazing that it was his baby he is looking at. When we heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time and was told the internal bleeding has cleared and the baby is safe, Ray grinned like an idiot.

Last month, we went for the 20th week check up and for those who are parents, you will know how detailed this is. The doctor took a screen shot of the face and the other body parts and for the first time, we all saw something very prominent down there - which tells us the baby is a boy. Nothing could described the look on Ray's face. I was a little disappointed cos I was hoping for a girl. But I guess, as long as the baby is healthy, it's okay regardless of the sex it is.

These few weeks, we could feel the kicking getting stronger and stronger and of course, more and more movements throughout the day. You think you watching the World Cup is fun? I am having more fun cos I can feel someone doing soccer movements in me. Ray's favorite sentence for now is "Kick, baby, kick!" because he thinks these kicks are funny. Nice husband huh?

We still have about four months to go before I am due and while sometimes I don't really feel good because of all the hormones, I thank God every now and then because save for a few puking, room spinning episodes and short tempers, I think I have it real easy. And with a husband like Ray, I guess I am luckier than a lot of my girlfriends. Not taking a dig at anyone but I know know why so many of my girlfriends were pissed at not getting enough support from their husbands.

I guess like most first-time parents, we are going to keep ourselves amused by the little one's antics till he is due to arrive in November. As for now, we'll keep our eyes on that belly as we wait for the time to arrive when we can see the belly moves because his movements are huge!

The long overdue wedding photos

2010-06-12T14:47:00.000+08:00

The wedding has been over for a month, I know. I have a good excuse. I was tired. Lalalalala....

Anyway, better late than never, here are the pretty photos from our wedding album.

Enjoy. Because like every other couple, soon these photos will be kept in a part of the store room till one day when the kids ask to see it. Which will be a good fifteen years later.

Ray has concealer and lip gloss on!

I wanted to write blushing bride but people who knows me knows I don't blush. Buay paiseh, what to do?

Ray's friend called this the "sexy hip twist". O.o

Hort Park

We have a brilliant photographer, I must say.

And how can we forget Sentosa.....where it all started. ^_*

We have a photo like that taken that morning when we were leaving.....

And the oh-too-familiar spot!

One last shot at Sentosa before the rain came puring down.

Jill to Ray : Will you marry me?

Ray : "Oooooh...checks out the cleavage!" Of course!

A scene from the Storm Riders. Look at the sky! Weeet!

The black black photo. Can see nothing except the big red thing on my hair.

Back from god-knows-where

2010-06-12T00:21:00.001+08:00

I am not dead. Neither is my blog dead. We are very much alive, thank you.
I am just busy. Super busy to blog, that's all.

Had to spend the whole of April planning for the wedding and catching up on sleep. Yes, I have to sleep at least eight hours a day or I am very screwed.

Had the wedding in May and right after, jumped back into the sea of work. Two events in the same month, one after the other, so of course, I am busy like hell.

Now that we only have one launch in June, I can finally blog. Haiz....I wish I have more time to do the things I love, like blogging, reading, cross-stitch or even cooking. Of course, I wish I can have more time to club, but at four and a half months pregnant and being sleepy 90% of the time, clubbing is no longer on the top of the priority list.

So, if you are wondering what I have been doing the past two months since the last post.....well, I had gone off to get married, get pregnant and prep myself for a family. Oh yesh, family. You heard right. Come November, we will be welcoming the young one (sex to be revealed shortly). That's why life has became very hectic, for me at least, since I feel like I am battling against time everyday.

The husband said - uh-huh, DoRAYmon has upgraded from boyfriend to husband now - that since I am pregnant now, I will have more things to write about. Oh yes, I do have a lot of comments and things to say but I am too tired at the same time. More than often, I wish I can have a computer which auto types what I am thinking in my head, photoshop the pictures I am thinking of photoshopping in my mind and blog for me when I am too tired to do anything. But this is not happening so I am praying hard that the husband will do the job of the imaginary invincible computer. Which honestly, doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon too. Bleah.

So, to keep this blog alive and earn some diaper moolah in the form of advertising money, I am going to try to blog more. Keyword here is - TRY. Don't leave messages asking why there are no new posts if you don't see anything for say, two weeks.

Will upload the wedding photos shortly. In the meantime, here's a shot of me giving my life away. O.o

Mad March

2010-03-27T17:42:00.002+08:00

It's supposed to be more like a Mushy March....or Much-In-Love March....or even a Mad Love March.
But I am calling it Mad March because well, it was a mad month for us.

Nope, I did not forget that it has been eight months since we got together then. But I was simply too busy and too tired to blog. Of course, I could have done a one-liner, post it up and consider it blogging. But seriously, what's the point of doing a crap job when you can do one perfect one?

So, if anyone thought I had dropped dead, the truth is I was almost dead. Twenty eight and a half years of my life, this is the first BLOODY time I truly wish I have 48 hours in my life. Yah lah, I did wish for this many hours before when I was single and having a lot of fun out there...but.....moving on.......

It was a good month. I left the PR company I was in after a month and a half, went for a one week holiday in Perth with DoRAYmon, came back and joined a German automaker. New career, new scope of work, new challenges, new fun and the best part? Back with the old boss! Mad love.

And the big news now - We are getting married! :)
Yes, you heard right. Wedding is on 2nd May, Sunday.

This is the reason why this has been a busy month. Planning a wedding from scratch is fun but when you have a new career on hand and so little time till the big day, a wedding seems like the hardest thing to plan!
But we have been lucky till now cos we had a lot of help and a big sponsorship from a special someone. :D

See, this is the reason why my blog has been left out there in the cold. Almost everyday, there is something to be done - getting the schedules fixed, replying emails, confirming RSVPs, getting the rings etc etc etc.
THEN, I realized something. I am damn good at this can? I got everything in place (well, almost) in two weeks. Am I good or what? I am considering, after we have a couple of kids, maybe I can look into doing wedding planning. More time for the family plus it's something I am damn good in lah!

To all those who have asked - yes, this is the latest news. I am getting married off. After so many long, failed relationships and short, crazy flings, I am finally settling in. A round of applause please. XD

It's really something that I am still coming to terms with. True, I had close brushes with marriages before but this time, this is the the closest time I have come so close to one. Trying on that wedding gown and ring does make a girl feels special. I guess that is the one time when a girl looks into the mirror and realizes (with an uh-oh) that this is the moment on when they will have to take full responsibility of their life. Take charge, make things work and be an adult. Sometimes, it still scares me when I think I am really going to get married. I admit I cringe when I see my single life - the one full of clubbing/ drinking/ smoking/ crazy parties/ irresponsible fun - slowly fading away. :s
But then, I guess this is life. We grow up, we move on, we grow into the next phase of life. And we pray that whatever comes along is not too fucked.

Anyway, while I go back to being busy with my wedding preparations, here are some of the photos we took in Perth. For more photos, it can be viewed on my Facebook (but I guess most have seen by now. :p)

Camwhoring by the O'Neill's pool.

Samantha and her Taxi

Cottesloe Beach

Alright - this photo was stupid. Downright stupid. I bought a double scoop ice cream to eat as we strolled along the beach. But then the wind was so strong that my ice cream was melting big time. That plus I did not have something to tie up my hair with. So there was this silly woman eating ice cream with her hair flipping wildly in her face while she tried her darn hardest to push her hair away. And her boyfriend leh? Happily snapping away at her ridiculous moment.

Ferris wheel at Swan Bell Tower.

Our host - Rory making a toast midway during the BBQ dinner.

And hostess, Vanessa talking to her neighbor.

Walking along Swan River to get to the jetty.

I found my family in a random shop at E Shed!

Port Beach

Little Creatures!

Must try beers? Sorry, I can't taste the difference. I AM NOT a beer person!

The must try mussels! Yummylicious!!!

And we found another must try - the Kanga skewers!

There he goes....seducing the camera again.

The ferris wheel by Swan Bell Tower at night.

Prevelly Beach - where we lost our camera! *sobs sobs*

This is when I thank God for the invention of the iPhone which took beautiful photos in daylight....

Winery tour - our first winery, Stella Bella Winery.

Wine, my love. See you in November. :)

Lunch at Voyager Estate. OMFG - the pork was as soft as the fish!

The flower garden in Voyager Estate.

The wild safari tour with Neil McLoed. This was when I miss my camera. Because the iPhone can't capture the kangaroos in the dark. -.-

Bye, Margaret River. Back to the O'Neills.

Brunch at Fast Eddy's!

Scarborough Beach - check out my shiny arms and legs! And for those who are STUPID enough to ask me - no, mine is not a fake tan. I am born dark skinned. Getting a tan is as simple as snapping my fingers. Duh.

Scarborough at sunset.

We then made our way back to Vanessa's to pack up and leave Perth.....

Who knows we missed our check in time by five minutes and had to buy fresh new tickets at SGD900 back the next day! KNN. Fuck you, Jetstar! I swear I will never take you budget airlines ever again.

Perth holiday is over

2010-03-01T00:25:00.000+08:00

It sucks. We waited four whole months for this holiday and it's over in a glimpse?!?! Life sucks at times, isn't it? Pui!!!

I decided not to blog or tweet while in Perth. Reason being that technology should NOT get in my way of a nice holiday like it used to. My only way of contact was via mobile and Facebook. And I am proud of myself because I FB less than a total of sixty minutes during my one week stay in Perth.

Pictures will be up over the next two days cos I am dead tired. We only arrived back yesterday morning and I spent these two days unpacking and doing laundry and etc etc etc. Bleah. Plus I start my new job tomorrow. Ooooh....back to the dream team again. ^_^

Looked up at the calendar and realized - five more FREAKING months to our next vacation?!?! WTH?!?!?!?!?!
I am going to book something in between. Haha!

Alright, I'll be nice. Here's a photo of us at King's Park.

Superb Seven

2010-02-12T00:02:00.000+08:00

Superb Seven - again, I find myself questioning where has all the time gone?

The fact that every month passes by so fast means I grow older faster. :(

Oh wait....this is not about me. It's about the cartoon network - DoRAYmon & PikaJill. :)

So, seven months now.......sometimes, I still feel like we are still intoxicated. Since day one when we met. Serious. But intoxicated in a good way. :)

Too much stuff has been happening, good and bad. Decisions we have to make, career changes, start of new careers, an almost homeless episode - gosh, we are like Chn 56 HK dramas.

Thank god it's over now. I can finally sit back and relax with a ~~glass of wine~~ can of sparkling apple juice drink.

At almost the seventh month, I discovered one more thing. DoRAYmon actually understands me more than I ever thought. With my bitchy attitude, I hate it when people judges me and tries to make me live my life their way. Think what? I am their Barbie doll ah? KNN. But thank god, DoRAYmon is the direct opposite. He has been ULTRA supportive all this while. Whenever I make a decision, he has never bring me down but supported me all the way.

I think someone up there really likes me and so, has sent me my angel. ^_^

Happiest seven months for now and many more to come!

ARGH!!!!

2010-02-10T10:47:00.000+08:00

I was so looking forward to our Seventh Month Anniversary, our first CNY (all dressed in ang-gong-gong) and Valentine's Day when everything came crashing down. KNN. TMD. KNNBCCB. Argh!!!

No, I am not letting my blog die a silent death. I was just too busy with stuff - planning for the Perth trip, preparing for CNY, changing job (ah yes, I am changing job) and stuff.

And no, DoRAYmon and I are not breaking up. Cartoon network is still going on strong. Hah!
It's just a whole load of stuff - family, work and cuckoo matters.

First, the happy stuff:

It's our seventh month together this Friday! Can't believe it, where has all the time gone to?
14 Feb 2010 is going to be our first Valentine's Day spent together....woot woot!
And our first CNY as well. No, no ang pows for any of you.
We are going to Perth in nine days' time! I realized - this is the first time I am taking a flight of more than four hours with a boyfriend. Let's see how much grumpy PikaJill can piss DoRAYmon off on the flight.
And erm.....a bit too soon but.....in exactly six months from today, we are going to Phuket!

And I am going to rant now.....you can close this window if you like.....

Stupid doctor said Mama don't need chemo then came back and say she need chemo. KNN
Dog can't to stay in the house when she has chemo sessions so she have to go.
If Christmas goes, I will go and DoRAYmon will go as well. That makes three of us homeless.
We are now really almost homeless and I am looking for a Master bedroom to rent urgently.
I need a landlord that will okay my dog but I have a feeling this is going to be very tough to find.
I lost my atm card...no money on me now. I have to go bank and draw it the traditional way. CCB
I tendered my resignation at my current company cos I have a FANTASTIC offer at an automaker company and people seems to take advantage of my leaving and is throwing all kind of shit at me. I am not stupid either. I can and I will play stupid and drag their time and make sure they get hell back. People seem to forget I have been in the workforce for 12 years now and I have seen all sort of stuff. I hate politics but if I have to do it, I will do it and screw people around.
I overspent on shopping AGAIN. Fuck me. Damn.

I can't decide if this year is a good or bad year anymore. Everything seems to be coming in at the same time. Argh....I need a drink. Actually, maybe I should just hop to the Martini Bar at lunch for one drink.... :p

New Year Resolutions

2010-01-22T22:07:00.001+08:00

I think I am the last few who are still posting New Year resolutions. Smart right? End of Jan then post. Might as well wait till next year then post.

But then, this is my blog. I can post anything, anytime I like. Lalalalalalala!
Honestly, these new year resolutions I drafted - I don't intend to stick by them. Those that know me will know I don't react well to rules and regulations. And it means I fail at keeping resolutions. Muahahaha!

Here goes :

Quit smoking. Laugh bah, you assholes. I know my friends are all evil people and are convinced I will pick up smoking within three months of quitting. Whatever! At least I am trying. Oh wait, quit smoking everyday but I will still be a social smoker. I can never not smoke when I am drinking. It's like eating chicken rice with no chicken.
Cut down on drinking or stop altogether. Erm....cut down is doable. Stopping altogether is not. I don't understand why I even write "stop".
Chill and take life easy. Enjoy the journey cos most of the time, we don't get to the destination. Well, at least for me, that's the case. People can promise to walk with you till the end but then they can always choose to take a turn in between. Like a friend said - mostly, at the end of the day, you are by yourself. So why not just enjoy the walk while it last?
Build up my savings account. Amazingly, this appears year after year. And very coincidentally, every time when I make my resolutions, my account shows double digits. Wahahaha! Ok, seriously, will make an effort to save this year.
Stop biting my right thumb. T, if you are reading this, you better stop laughing! It's a comfort issue. When I get nervous, I bite it unknowingly. Cannot is it?
Make something out of my career. I still have six years to fulfill my career goals. But why wait six years? I am going to make it happen in three.
Quit worrying about people. Enough is enough. I do my best, you want to be an asshole/ bitch/ idiot/ retard, go ahead. I came to this world without you and I survived. So, I won't die without you.
Make an effort to maintain friendships with the people who were with me during my darkest hours. Speaking of which, I better call the Ah Lian for our Oosters drink session soon.
Stop falling asleep about 9pm every night, then wake up at 3/4am, try to find stuff to do and go back to sleep at about 6am and start panicking cos I only have one more hour to sleep.
To make my Mama happy, yes, I will go see the god-damn doctor about that thingy on my neck. Knn....it's so near my face. If I have to go for an operation, I will kill myself.
Time for that degree. But I still want to have fun. So maybe after June will be a good time to head back to school. Haha!
Speaking of which, maybe get a driver's license. Bwahahaha! I am bullshitting here la. I want a chauffeur. Not be a chauffeur.
Stop using perfumes as air fresheners.
Stop glaring at people who bumps into me on the MRT when it's crowded.
Instead of yelling "Can you all move in?!?!" to people on a crowded bus, smile sweetly, then say "Move it please, assholes."

I think that's about it. Actually, there's a lot more but they are mostly rubbish resolutions I don't intend to keep so I just deleted them.

Actually, I don't think I will keep to most of them so drafting them was probably self entertainment at that time. Oh right, they were drafted because one of the resolutions was to at least blog once a week!

All the bitchy stuff

2010-01-14T14:22:00.000+08:00

Procrastination mood is in action :

New Year resolutions - still sitting in draft folder. Should have posted it up last week already.
Perth's itinerary - haven't even started on it.
Oz visas - still haven't applied.
Travel insurance - still haven't buy.
Hotel for first night in Perth - not booked yet.
Update iTunes library - lazy to do.

Random things that I have been doing since 2010 started :

Play Bejeweled on my iPhone and has beaten all high scores that DoRAYmon set.
Play Cafe World like mad and is now near level 60 - the last level of the game.
Walk pass the LV boutique at ION whenever I have a chance and dream of the day when I can buy that luggage bag that will cost me a year of my salary. Did I mention the window by my side looks right into the open air area of ION and I see the LV boutique 24/7? No good.
Constantly battle the urge to shop online at VS. Or rather all online shopping sites.
Facebook non-stop. Twitter non-stop.

I need to move my butt. Am procrastinating too much - typical Libran behavior. Damn.

Btw, Angie the Choice at Novena Square SUCKS. I bought a pandan cake for Mama yesterday and asked if we can have a plastic knife cos hospitals don't usually give you a knife for cakes and the stupid woman gave a FUCK FACE and said : "We DO NOT give plastic knife for this kind of cake."

First of all, what is with that chee bye face and attitude?
Secondly, pandan cake is not cake ah?!?!?!?! KNN, if you have this kind of standard then you don't sell pandan cakes! Or put up a fucking sign that says : We DO NOT provide plastic forks for the cheap cakes we sell.

Mind you, we didn't buy a slice. We bought a whole round pandan cake ok? No doubt it's only four bucks but it's still a whole cake ok, bitch?

I would have thrown the cake back in her face like what I did to that stupid KFC manager at Woodlands if not because Mama wants pandan cake and we could not get it after searching the whole of Novena Square. Knn...what kind of customer service is this? No wonder your counter was empty.

Just remembered - I should send an email to Angie The Choice and complain. In DoRAYmon's words : "DIE BITCH!" (too bad, you stepped on the wrong tail)

And this morning, some China woman who works next door pointed out to me that I have wrinkles around my eyes. Another KNN one.
Still try to be generous and ask if I want some eye cream. Thank you bitch, but no thanks. I have a bottle of expensive eye cream (that you probably cannot afford) sitting on my dressing table at home. I am just too lazy to use it. Plus, I am a lot younger than you, I DO NOT NEED INTENSIVE CARE like you.

If I have wrinkles around my eyes, it's because I am happy and I laugh too much and thus the smiley wrinkles around my eyes.
Unlike you who have not much wrinkles around your eyes because you probably has nothing in life to be happy about.

Splendid Six

2010-01-12T15:16:00.000+08:00

I remembered it was our last morning in Vietnam when we skipped out for breakfast. Firstly, the breakfast at the hotel sucks and I really didn't want to eat it two days in a row. Secondly, I have been wanting to go sit in a little French-like cafe, have coffee and watch the world go by since we touched down in Ho Chi Minh.

So, that morning, DoRAYmon told me to wake up earlier so we can go have brekkie before flying home. That was the first, followed by many-to-come moments where I would say I wish I can have something and he makes it happen.

It has been nearly four months since the Vietnam trip. And exactly six months or half a year (depends on how you like to call it) today since we went official. And many times, during these six months, DoRAYmon has been working his magic to make things happen.

Things haven't been easy for us all the time. There was a prank email which nearly broke us up, times when we are totally broke (my bad lah, cos I went jobless for three months and wiped out all my savings), news of Mama diagnosed with cancer, career changes which affects the stability we were once familiar with.

But we have never backed down. Neither have we argued on how difficult things are at times. I am thankful that God sent me someone who has (and whom I know always will) walk through difficult times with me. Whenever things get a little shitty, I always think of that morning when we sat in the little French cafe in HCM and how we let each other in on thoughts of our projected future. That was the moment when I truly believed that something good is happening.

DoRAYmon said : Because we are happy, time passes by faster. Because we are happy, it makes the journey easy.
In reply to this, I say : Because we are happy, we had the most splendid six months. Because we are happy, we are going to have many, many more blocks of splendid sixes coming.

PS : Sixes = six months = many, many six months. Not sixteen kid for his dream DOTA & WOW team. -.-

Looking back...

2010-01-03T03:11:00.001+08:00

Looking back at 2009, I realized it had truly been a fast year. I thought I was screwed at first because the thought of facing everything alone was damn scary. But oh well, I survived and now I am stronger than before. *insert smug look*

A recap of the past year....walk with me and re-live the crazy moments.

01 January 2009 - Spent New Year counting down with The Sistahood, their partners, my bro, Michael and a few friends at Luke's crib. That was the first New Year that I actually celebrated with a bunch of people after like six years.

January - Three months since Shawn and I broke up. I decided I need to get up on my feet cos I had sat at the crossroad long enough. This was the breakthrough month as I removed the ring from Shawn that I had worn for five whole years. The necklace that I had really loved and worn since he gave it to me on my 21st birthday was also taken down. The old blog that track what happened during our relationship of six years was also shut down for good.

February - Threw a mahjong party and The Sistahood plus a bunch of close friends came over for food and mahjong. It was ages since I organized something like that! Awesome party! Met up with Shawn one last time to cancel the mobile lines and the feeling of how everything-is-over-after-we-part-ways-here washed over me. At that point of time, I felt like a burden has been lifted off me and I can finally walk on into my new journey. Attended Her World's birthday party with AW on Valentine's day and got myself drunk on Moet & Chandon by 5pm. (wtf??)

March - Doctor finally instructed "No alcohol". Didn't really listen but instead of drinking everyday, I cut down the drinking sessions to three/ four a week. An achievement ok?!?!

April - First time to Batam for a spa weekend with Sea Cucumber! Also, it was this time when I decided to not be so "dao" and accept more people/ friends into my life. Also, around this time, I embraced my title of being "Single" and am proud of it.

May - Second time to Batam with Sea Cucumber. Attended Pink Dot event at Hong Lim Park with JT & LP. Went out for quite a few dates. Knew DoRAYmon via FB. 29 May - first time DoRAYmon and I met up at Boiler. ^_^

June - First time I joined a movie night thingy with HY and the girls at Luke's. Got my third tattoo on the back of my neck. Fell very sick for a week - stupid viral infection and gastric flu. Started to spend more time with DoRAYmon while status was unknown. -.-

July - DoRAYmon had a couple of misplaced wallet and key incidents and started staying over. Then we went to Genting. And become a couple officially in Genting (of all places). Then we became "同居蜜友" ever since. **Happiness**

August - Attended unofficial pink dot picnic at Botanic Gardens with DoRAYmon, Chris, Terence and Louis. Went to the Smirn-Off event together on National Day where DoRAYmon meets JT. It was HILARIOUS!

September - Spent the first stay-cation at Rasa Sentosa with DoRAYmon a week before Vietnam. Visited Vietnam for the first time with DoRAYmon, Sis and Mao Mao - best holiday ever.

October - Left the PR company I was working for after three years. DoRAYmon organized a birthday dinner for me and it was also the first time we celebrated my birthday. Booked our tickets for Perth. First time in my life where I booked a holiday four months in advance! @.@

November - Accepted the offer at the new company, it's a managerial position! DoRAYmon and I had our first quarrel. Eeyer. Wasn't a very happy month but we survived.

December - This is a fucking eventful month. Seriously. Went to Buko Nero (the restaurant that's famous for the months' long wait list) for dinner. Got an email which we have dismissed as a prank email (I can't write details of what happened because of some possible legal issues). Mum got diagnosed with breast cancer. We got couple phones - the iPhone! Well, I got mine myself lah while DoRAYmon's was a Christmas gift from me. DoRAYmon finally met the family, including the grandparents. Mama finally giving us her blessings.
AND, a day or rather twenty four hours before the year ended, DoRAYmon said (I know he will probably strangle me for writing this out but I can't help it!) : You are going to be my wife.

Wooooo.....weeeee......wooooooot! What can I say? *acts shy*
Eh...this is not a proposal. No. Really not lah. But it could possibly happen soon. Yes, I am ultra confident in Us. :p

As I saw how the past year began and ended, I realize how drama it looks. It began in the worst possible way but ended in the best scenario ever. When I thought my door was closed for good forever, God decided to send me an angel to turn my fucked up life around and fill it up with a lot of laughter and joy.

I haven't been this happy for a long, long time. Looking at how good this new year is already looking - I start in my new career next week, we have a trip to Australia next month, we have talked about working out something concrete for us when we are back from holidays, we are talking (though vaguely) of vacation plans in the third quarter of the year) - I can't help but look forward to our new year. ^_^

This pretty much sums up my crazy 2009 and gives you an insight into my beautiful 2010. How about you? What have you done for the past year? Are you looking forward to the next year excitedly like me?

PS : I have drafted an entry on my new year resolutions. Oh yeah, I did it again. Some are practical while some are crap which I really don't intend to keep. But I am tired after the mahjong games today and DoRAYmon is nagging at me to go to bed (the nagging has stopped for a few minutes now though...haha) so I guess I will post it up over the next couple of days.

A blessing that finally arrive

2009-12-30T17:40:00.004+08:00

The first time Mama saw Ray, she said : Eh....he looks like a playboy. Got that flirty look leh. Plus you both status so confusing. What is the relationship between you two huh?

My answer to her then was : Aiya, playboy then playboy la. No status then no status la. I am not looking for a partner now anyway. Plus you want to match-make me to the Indo-Chinese guy in Batam all the time. I can play around before going for the match-make session mah.

Then, Ray and I went to Genting for a weekend and the rest, like they said....is history.

Yesterday, while Ray was out, Mama came and have a talk with me.

Mama : Are you both getting married? If yes, can get married at end of 2010 or wait till 2011?

Me : *looking nervous* Why must this kind of date huh? *then got dramatic* And why you want to marry me off so quickly? Six months ago, you want to send me to match-make with some guy and now you want to marry me off?

Mama : No la. Cos we (Mama, Stepdad and sister) are moving back to Woodlands after your sister's PSLE next year. So, when you guys get married then, there is extra space.

Me : But we are all perfectly fine now mah. Enough rooms mah. No need to move la.

Mama : Then when you have baby, how? Baby sleep where?

Me : *wah kao....my mama think until so far* Sleep with me, in my room la. Eh, I thought you say Ray look very flirtatious? You dare to marry me off to him ah? Not scared later he cheat on me?

Mama : You happy can already. If happy, then marry, When not happy, then divorce. Anyway, you so fierce, if he cheat on you, he know he will kena jialat jialat.

Me : *knn* I change already ok?!?! I very good tempered now hor! Very long never "chu" stunts already can???? Fine, so you DARE to marry me off to a flirtatious looking guy now la?

Mama : Whatever la. Whatever makes you happy.

Mama's love - how great it is. In a situation like that, parents will only react two ways. One, insist that that guy is a flirt, and stop you from going out with him or nag till you stop dating him. Second, let you do whatever that makes you happy. If you succeed, they pop champers to celebrate your success. If you fail, they welcome you back into their embraces with a blanket and warm cocoa (in my case, it's a few bottles of wine).

I remember Mama was very strict with me when I was a kid. She used to cane me till I scream and yelp (and black out once which is hilarious everytime we talk about it). But one thing that she did and I always felt that she did right was being very supportive in whatever we do. Even when she knows that chances of succeeding is near zero, she will still let us do what we want. She believes that to know the pain and to avoid getting hurt in future, you need to fall and climb back up yourself first. However, the one thing she will always do is have our backs when we come crying home.

When Ray and I were at the status-unknown stage, many times I had to defend our relationship and my choice. I know a lot of people were not happy then because they felt I deserve better but it was also too late to turn back. Mama questioned our relationship only once and she left it at that. Of course, when we went official, I could see the relief on her face.

Now, almost six months later, I know Mama has come to accept Ray fully and she is actually not worried about marrying me off to him. *looks amused*

The last big thing for this year, I guess, will be that we finally have Mama's blessings. This is really important to me because it means that I will not have to defend Ray and our relationship anymore. Eh....the Empress Dowager has spoken. Who dares to defy her?

I am truly blessed. I started 2009 in tears but thirty hours from now, I will bade farewell to it with a huge smile (or Pikachu grin as Ray would have call it). ^_^

Pikachu grin :

Best Christmas Ever

2009-12-29T16:13:00.004+08:00

Goodbye, Christmas Day. I waited one whole year for you and I am glad you did not disappoint me. This year was a pretty quiet but nice Christmas. Well, not quiet-quiet since we went to two Christmas parties. But not your usual party-at-Boiler kind of parties.

Christmas is my favorite holiday of the year because it reminds me that it is nearly year end, I get to attend many parties and not to mention the pressies I receive and it is when I know the new year (definitely a better year) is going to arrive soon. Heeeee......

This Christmas was near perfect. For the past few years, I always had to attend Christmas parties alone even though I was attached. I always had to decide if it's the family or the boyfriend I want to accompany. Needless to say, the family wins year after year after year. LOL. (however, it's a pain having to decide year after year after year) This Christmas, I no longer have to make such decisions because I have met someone who have the same beliefs as me - we like family gatherings like these (hah!). So instead of deciding who to accompany this year, Ray came with me to Grandma's. Fine, I had it easy with Ray but that's because he loves me enough to come know my family better ok? *smug look*

This year, we did the gifts exchange before Christmas Day. I decided to give Ray his gift a couple of days earlier cos I know he will want to jailbreak his iPhone (yes, that's his Christmas pressie) so by the time it's all done up, it would have been Christmas Day. And I got my pressie on Christmas Eve. I strongly believe I got my gift earlier by a day because Ray knows I have been snooping around, trying to look for my gift. Oh, did I mention he stupidly said there was a Christmas gift for me a few days before Christmas? I initially thought the pink iPhone cover was the gift but then he said there was something else. And so I snooped. Hah!

But, the gift aside, the best Christmas gift this year were the promises Ray wrote in the card. Yah lah, I know words are cheap but to know that someone can feel so strongly for me at that point of time makes me go gaga. No, I am not showing the contents in the card. Well, maybe one day when I win some awards like XX, then I might write my own love story and show everyone the contents.......but wait long long hor............

Knowing that he is willing to be with me no matter how tough it is now and is willing to climb every steep uphill climb with me is the best gift for me. Knowing that he will fight for us and our future is the best assurance I can ever asked for. In short, just by being here with me is already the best gift he could have given to me.

Ray said the other day : "The new year is approaching. It's going to be a new year, a new start for us".

We do not know what will happen in the future. 2010 is going to be busy, busy, busy for sure as I continue the second leg of my career advancements while Ray embarks on a whole new career. But I know we are going to leave behind all the bad memories (silly prank emails and arguments, or rather that one argument) and move ahead together, as a couple, as a team for a better year. And maybe, if all goes well, I will be blogging about our Christmas next year!

Enough of words, enjoy the pictures as promised.

Christmas pressies! Can guess who got what for who now?

One is mine lah. Not a Christmas pressie though. Bleah.

But the one on the right is someone's Christmas pressie. Lucky DoRAYmon.

Obvious enough which belongs to who? Oh actually, I sometimes think that Ray kinda like Hello Kitty but is too shy to admit it.

Ta-dah.....My Christmas pressie!

Think they are just photos? Each of them represent something - the first day we went official at Genting, the first time we went on a holiday to Vietnam and my birthday which we first celebrated together.

Effort max to dig them out, have them printed and fitted into frames. Many had thought it was me who did this but no......not me. It was my DoRAYmon. *grinz*

Our first Christmas dinner at Grandma's.

Well, DoRAYmon, welcome to the family. ^_^

Over at Erin's, we decided we need to have a shot with the Christmas tree to commemorate our first Christmas together. Hah!

Happy holidays, all! Catch up in 2010 again.

Happy New Year and all the best to all you lovely readers out there!

Merry Christmas all

2009-12-25T00:41:00.013+08:00

First of all, to you readers out there who have emailed me or DM me on Twitter - thanks for all the regards and concern.

Went with Mama to the hospital yesterday and the operation is confirmed for 11th Jan. We still do not know the stage of the cancer but for now, we are crossing fingers and hoping it's at the advance stage. We need a lot of strength to be strong for her and I admit it's getting emotionally strained to stay calm and to act like normal so as not to affect her mood. It's truly a hard time and it sometimes takes every bit of strength in me not to break into tears when I think of how we can easily lose her.

It's hard but I know God is watching on us from above. In our moments of weakness, I hope he will somehow help us pull through. Anyway, thank you guys for the words of encouragement. It may be just words but for now, it really mean a lot to me.

It's Christmas Eve now as I draft this entry. I was looking forward to this Christmas because last year's was crap. Mama's diagnosis took me by shock and I don't feel festive at all. Oh well, maybe the mood will build up tomorrow morning. Bah.

I had a wish list actually. But for this year, I am not going to be greedy and I am going to ask for just one thing - all I want for Christmas this year is for Mama to be well and healthy like before.

I am going to go look at Christmas for an hour or so. Maybe I will start feeling festive. @.@

Bye for now or rather till the next entry where you will all get to see what Ray got for me this Christmas. Guarantee you will all go "Aw....." though the effort placed in the gift cannot fight with me (yes, I very yaya one). Full story of how much effort I placed in his gift will accompany the photos. Sit tight and wait ah.....

Merry Christmas all and God bless you and your loved ones!

I wish I can stab you. Seriously.

2009-12-17T15:16:00.007+08:00

I feel like getting a tattoo. A fighting fish tattoo that I have been yearning for a long, long time.

Things haven't been well lately. And please, for fuck's sake, stop asking if I am okay. I am not. And seriously, is "I AM NOT okay" the answer you want to hear? If not, shut the fuck up and fuck off.

Just when the first argument ended and things are looking up, another bomb had to drop. Friend or foe, I wonder what you are exactly.

If you are a friend, till now, I am still very curious why you are withholding your identity. Why do you want to see your friend hurt if you are truly a friend? Don't tell me that you are afraid that when we meet up in future, we will feel awkward. This is an excuse, not a reason. Nothing is more awkward than this hoo-ha you have created. I hope you are happy.

If you are a foe or psycho bitch, I hope you will burn in hell. Your kids will be born with no assholes and they will choke on fishballs and sotong balls. If you have a son, he will have erectile dysfunction, so bad that he cannot even have a hard-on to PCC. If you have a daughter, she will have no womb. Not only can she never have children, she can forget about having sex. Btw, I will keep on sending porn stuff to your children just to see them suffer.

As for you, I hope you will fall into god-damn holes you come across, have flower pots drop on your head, cars e-braking at you (so you will have many heart attacks) and get cheated on by all your partners. If you think this is a funny prank, let me tell you - this is a fucking sick joke. If you are that free, maybe you should spend more time thinking on how you can contribute to this society instead of doing retarded stuff like that. Oh, but wait, you don't have much brains, do you? How to think like that? Huh? Huh? Huh?

Sorry all, especially those of you who are students - this probably all sound very crude but I am super pissed off now. I could have print screen the email I received from someone claiming to be my friend and stick it all onto my blog but for now, I am holding that back because of some reasons, which I will tell when time is right.

PS : Over the years, I realize I have a very foul mouth. Once, over an argument, I told my friend that I hope his dad will die and sure enough, he died in his sleep shortly after. To another friend, I told him I hope his mum will kena kidney disease so that they can all suffer and true enough, that happened. This is one of the reasons why I choose to swear at people with the most unkind words than curse them because my curses do come true. So, whoever you are, I am not taking these back. In fact, I wish you the best of luck.

FML. Seriously.

2009-12-16T14:56:00.002+08:00

Just when everything was going well and just when we thought our plans are going nicely without any hitchbacks, shit happened.

The worst kind of shit. Words against words.

No one to have anyone's back. We can only hope for a miracle of sorts.

Dear God, please make me disappear this very minute. Amen

Little doses of joy!

2009-12-14T15:11:00.003+08:00

Ray said to me last night :

I have found the right one for me.

*grinz*

He said that while he was playing DOTA.

So I am not sure if it's for real.

But it still makes me happy.

Happiness.

^_^

Five months of Dirty Dancing

2009-12-11T21:43:00.008+08:00

The first time ever I saw your face,

I thought the sun rose in your eyes.

And the moon and the stars were the gifts,

You gave to me in the darkened end of the skies.

That was when the walls came down,

And I saw a Ray of light.

Five months......every month, I wonder how we got here so fast and before I knew it, it's another month gone again.

Someone once said : If you are happy everyday, your days will pass by quickly. But if you are not happy, even a second will feel like a year.

Thank God, until today, I am still asking for time to slow down a little. I can't catch up, it's passing by too fast!!!

As of today, I am STILL amazed at how time flies by. It's a weird feeling cos it seems like we have done a lot. But how much can be done in five months? We seem to have been together for a long time. But it's only five months?

A friend said : Settling down always take heaps of effort and I've always believed that if both parties tango together, the dance steps will be in sync after getting used to each other....And after that, one cannot do without each other.

Well, me being me, sometimes I refuse to dance and I stand at my spot and whine a lot about how unromantic he has become, how he plays his games more than he looks at me, how he no longer is mushy. But really, I do appreciate all that he has done. Love is fulfilling your love's wishes without them having to make any requests. And I have seen for myself how all I need is to mention something and Ray will go all out to make it happen. The best part - I never have to ask him to do it or even try to drop any hints and viola, wish granted! I guess this is what they mean by "To love is to give".

Well, Ray and I don't know how to do the Tango. We do it the "Dirty Dancing" way and luckily, we have no problems getting in-sync there. Wahahahahaha!

Sorry for the TMI but if you don't like it, you can stop reading my blog. Bleah.

So, I guess since we are young and flexible right now, we will concentrate on putting lots of effort in synchronizing our dirty dances......till the day when we are old and our bones are brittle, we might just settle for the Tango.