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But this is a tribute to the leaders over 40 who so many of us under 40 too often think “don’t really understand what’s going on anymore.”

So to all of my young, passionate, ready to change the world peers who are under 40:

SIT down, SHUT UP, and LISTEN!

SHUT UP, and LISTEN. To the sages and wise mentors in our lives, in our companies, in our organizations, in our families, in our churches. The leaders who’ve been there, who’ve succeeded and failed, who’ve experienced multiple recessions, who’ve actually watched technology advance, who don’t just talk about experience but actually have it, who have been through the process of being Made into who they are today.

Before many of us who “think” we are the next great hope for saving our generation, or leading our generation in a whole new way, or reclaiming our culture, or just simply fill in the blank……. go any further, we need to find the mentors and sages and patriarchs and matriarchs around us and glean wisdom from them.

Every young leader I know could use a whole lot more Saged Leader in their life.

Especially those of us in our early 30′s. In our early 20′s many times we are still hungry and humble enough to seek out mentors, and find the 50 year old + sages who can provide wisdom and counsel. But for some reason, in our late 20′s and 30′s, especially our early 30′s, we start to think we’ve grown up and got it all together, and that now we think instead of seeking wisdom and counsel, we should be giving it. We tend to lose the desire to learn by listening, and start to “protect our turf” by talking. And talking more. About what we’ve done and the things that we’ve accomplished….. over the last 10 years of our “career.”

Many of us in the “next generation” of leaders need to put down the microphone, and instead get out a pen and paper and start taking notes.

So find a wise mentor, a seasoned sage, someone who’s lived a little more, loved a lot deeper, prayed a lot harder, led alot longer, and sit down…..Shut up…..and Listen. To them.

ABOUT YOUNG LEADERS

1. Today’s 20- and 30-somethings are more willing to collaborate than any other generation before. They trust each other. Really. And they see collaboration as the starting point, not as some grandiose vision of teamwork that is far off in the distance.
2. For the next generation, it’s way less about who they’re working with and way more about what they’re doing.
3. Going forward, leaders won’t have followers unless they trust them and see that they are authentic and real. Authenticity is not only important to the next generation, it’s a requirement.
4. Young leaders are ambitious and passionate about making a difference now. They’re not willing to wait their turn. They want to influence now.
5. Leaders age 35 and under in general are more about projects than they are about careers, more about movements instead of organizations. So if you want to keep us around in your organization, you’re going to have to pursue us. Show us you are approachable and connected to where we are in life.
6. Literally, you need to kick them out. Not only give them permission to leave, but actually encourage them to leave and pursue other things. Once it’s time for them to move on, they might need your encouragement to pursue what God might be stirring up in them.
7. Every young leader I know could use a whole lot more saged leaders in their life.

ABOUT VISION

8. What keeps you up at night? This one is a familiar question for most leaders. What makes you cry? What makes you mad? What are the things that nag at you? This question has to do with what you are passionate about.
9. What gets you up in the morning? This one is less familiar to most of us, but probably even more important. What keeps you and your team committed? Engaged and excited? This question has more to do with purpose.
10. Don’t settle for just going through life enduring the five days of the workweek, to only have as your greatest goal of the week to make it to the weekend. Love what you do, or at least like it. It’s too important not to.
11. As believers, as followers of Jesus, if we’re not chasing after something that is so much bigger than we are, and there’s no way we could ever accomplish it without God, then we are playing it too safe.

ABOUT DECISION-MAKING

12. Making decisions as a leader is normal and ordinary and required. It’s why you are a leader. Embrace it.
13. For big decisions, always sleep on them. The extra time will allow your decision to be made without the spontaneous emotion that comes with a spontaneous response.
14. Create a culture of action in your organization. Many leaders quickly become overwhelmed with several decisions in front of them and then unintentionally paralyze the organization by avoiding them all.
15. A lot of us as leaders are willing to allow our team members to make decisions, but want to step in as soon as we see something done differently than we would do. Don’t make that mistake. It is totally demoralizing to your team.

ABOUT CONFLICT

16. Tension is a powerful platform to clarify what is important. Out of tension many times comes change—change for good.
17. Generational tension is essential in passing the mantle of leadership. For the Church to move forward in culture, older leaders must pass on their wisdom and legacy to younger leaders.
18. Leaders lead in the fray. Leading in the safety zone is easy, but true leadership happens in the fray where change is happening and there is a unique tug-of-war happening in that area.
19. Tension among and within a team is healthy. Unity doesn’t mean there’s no tension. Unity means you are pursuing the same mission in the midst of real and purposeful tension.
20. As a leader, lean into the tension that constantly exist. As Andy Stanley says, some tensions are meant to be managed, not removed.
21. Four things poison a team faster than anything else: arrogance, lack of communication, “me-first” vs. “we-first,” and jealousy/cynicism.

ABOUT COMMUNICATING

22. Keep it simple. Stay focused on a few key points. And use common sense. If it sounds confusing, it probably is. If it sounds cheesy, it probably is.
23. Tell great stories to validate your points. Unless you are just an amazing communicator, your points probably won’t hold me. So sprinkle in some great stories, good analogies, and current events.
24. Inspire action. Push me toward doing something, not just hearing something.
25. Create hooks, repetitions, and memorable phrases. I won’t remember all you said, but I might remember something you said. Our current culture is now built around sound bites—status updates, tweets, texts, etc. So keep it simple, but also keep it short.
26. Land the plane on time. Don’t just end on time, but actually end with the right timing. Don’t keep circling above the runway—land it now.

ABOUT LEADERSHIP

27. 12 Characteristics of Leaders
    • Be humble
    • Be authentic
    • Be generous
    • Be Christ-like
    • Be the best at what you do
    • Be consistent
    • Be courageous, willing to go first and take risks
    • Be honest and trustworthy
    • Be thankful
    • Be a learner
    • Be inspiring and vision-giving
    • Be adaptable and open to change
28. What pastors can learn from business leaders: (a) Collaboration (b) Excellence (c) Execution.
29. What business leaders can learn from pastors: (a) Relationships first (b) Income for greater purposes (c) Leadership.
30. You are never too good at what you do or who you are to need honest feedback from yourself, your peers, your family, and your friends. Seek it out constantly.
31. The more humble you are, typically the more self-aware you are. The more arrogant you are, typically the less self-aware you are.
32. You’re not that important, and you need to relax. Sometimes the more platform and position we get, the more seriously we take ourselves. Don’t.
33. No one wants to work FOR or AROUND a leader who doesn’t understand who they really are.
34. One of the keys for properly channeling your ambition is to have people around you who will tell you what you may not want to hear, trusted friends and advisors who are honest and authentic with you.
35. As leaders, we are called to a higher standard. And as followers of Christ, an even higher standard. Set your standards so high that it may seem impossible to reach them.
36. It drives me crazy when I see something done without excellence but with the excuse of “Well, it’s okay because our intentions are good.” Nope. Not good enough. Our God deserves our very best. Always.
37. Comparing yourself to others just like you won’t challenge you or make you improve. Compare yourself to the best. Both inside and outside your industry. Learn from others who are better.
38. “Us” is way better than “me” or “you.”
39. Next time someone says “How have you all accomplished this?…” or “What do you plan to accomplish the rest of this year?…” or “Who is involved in making things happen within your organization?…” or “Talk about the keys to success for you?….” make sure you start your answer with “WE” or “US” or “OUR.”
40. True influence is about more than just someone listening. It’s about action. And it’s about change. If I simply buy your book and read a few chapters, but don’t put anything into action, are you really influencing me? If I listen to you speak, but make no changes in my life or the way I lead, are you really influencing me? If I follow you on Twitter, but it doesn’t change anything for me, are you really influencing me?
41. Teams that are excellent at what they do attract people who are excellent at what they do.
42. A great statement in terms of trust: I’ll do what I said I would do, and if not, I will tell you.
43. Ultimately, we create a culture of trust by trusting, and trusting more, and trusting even more.
44. As leaders, if our team fears our response when they mess up, because they’ve seen our response and don’t want to deal with that, we need to change our response.
45. I would much rather have a horse I have to hold back versus a horse I have to spur to get going.
46. Whether you like it or not, you are ALWAYS training.

IN GENERAL

47. The more you have, the harder it is to give it up. Doesn’t matter whether we are talking about money, possessions, toys, influence, team members, projects, or assignments.
48. You are never really “ready” for anything. Some say that you should wait until you are “mature” enough to pursue certain things in life. But we’re never really ready, are we?
49. Being remarkable 1. Takes a lot of energy. 2. Is not easy. 3. Requires a constant sense of improvement, innovation, and intuitiveness. 4. Is a clear commission from God. 5. Provides platform, credibility, and respect in the culture at large. 6. Steps up the game of those around you.
50. We have to fight against the idea of just wearing a wristband and feeling like we’ve done something.
51. WHO you are working with is just as important as WHAT you are working on.
52. Love people until they ask why.

Teams are incredibly important in accomplishing a vision. And as the leader of organizations, projects, initiatives and churches, maybe the most important thing you do is select, equip and release leaders.

We talked a few posts ago about being a great employee, so here are a few thoughts on building a team. Several of these points have been constructed and edited based on thoughts that Brian Houston from Hillsong Church shared with a few of us in a retreat setting a few years ago.

1. Live and lead so that your team is an overflow of your leadership. Your team will reflect your leadership. What you see in them is what you’re modeling to them. Overflow to your team in a healthy positive way.

2. Don’t think too much, or too little, of yourself. As the directional organization leader, you aren’t the hero, but you’re also not the goat. A healthy balance on this is the right direction.

3. Create a structure and system that allows people on your team to flourish. Can people flourish on your team, or does your personality or stature or the system get in the way? If someone can’t flourish, why would they stay? Find structures that release people.

4. Don’t just look to people, look thru them. What is the next generation? Who will replace you? Constantly build layers of leadership – think generationally.

5. Hire heart before head every time. I want a hustler, not a know it all. I want someone who is passionate and hungry, not entitled and complacent.

6. Slow and steady, not fast and furious. Building leaders takes time, but is always worth it. You may not always be able to find the right people, but you can always build into them. It’s a marathon, not a sprint in terms of developing people.

7. Constantly fight the bureaucracy as you grow. People are not the problem, sometimes it’s the structure or systems. Even in large organizations, things happen with 3-5 people working closely together. Small and stealth vs large and slow when it comes to teams that get things done. Where there is bureaucracy, the team perishes.

8. Model strong leadership, and not controlling leadership. Your team doesn’t want a dictator.

9. Create a culture where things are out in the open. Don’t let issues fester too long.

10. Be consistent yet customized. Create an environment that is predictable (security) but innovative (creative).

11. Demand a pursuit of perfection. It’s not about being perfect, but the pursuit of perfection should be something every one of your team members feels responsible to achieve. It starts with you, and flows from there.

It’s a pretty simple process that has proven to be pretty effective over the years. This can be useful in any organization or scenario, whether you are launching ideas, or just looking to make sound decisions. Here you go:

1. Create- we spend a ton of time just brainstorming, which is obviously a very important part of the process. The more ideas on the board, the more opportunities for one of those to make it through the process. For example, we have probably 300-350 programming ideas every year for our October conference. And creative meetings are “yes and” meetings, not “but or”. Important!

2. Criticize – every idea, in order to stay in the process, has to be critiqued and criticized significantly. This is key in order to make sure you don’t spend tons of time chasing too many rabbits and driving everyone crazy with lots of good ideas but nothing ever happening. And make sure everyone doesn’t take things personal- criticizing an idea is much different than criticizing the person who came up with the idea. It’s not personal.

3. Optimize- anything that makes it pass the criticize phase has to be built on. In some ways, this is a second and third wave of innovation. Most of the time the original idea will turn into something that looks totally different. This is really the essence of putting icing on the cake. If you are the leader and idea generator, at this point in the process your idea may be totally changed and enhanced from what it was originally. You have to be OK with this!

4. Validate- every idea has to be validated- financially, operationally, personnel wise, and direction/vision related. Lots of big ideas appropriately get held up in this phase, either to be released later or put on the shelf for good. Conversely, lots of bad ideas make it through this phase because of bad systems and/or leaders who aren’t willing to say no, or teams who won’t say no to the team leader’s idea.

5. Execute- it all comes down to getting things done. Hard work is time consuming and tiring. And actually putting ideas into action is tremendously difficult and draining. We take tremendous pride in execution on ideas. If it has gone through the entire process and made it to this point, the idea deserves the attention and focus to make sure it happens. And if every level of the Idea process grid was correctly put in motion, the idea is probably going to be good!

Are you busy but not intentional? Do you feel like you are just spinning your wheels and not getting any traction? Does there seem to be a lack of any kind of momentum in your organization? Could be you are dealing with way too much “sideways energy.” There is good energy and bad energy- and bad energy usually shows up as sideways… not because it is necessarily bad, but because it is usually a distraction.

We need to avoid sideways energy. It drives me crazy!

So what is Sideways Energy?

- Sideways energy is showing up to work but spending two hours talking about what you should have done an hour and a half ago.

- Sideways energy is gossiping about your boss or co-workers.

- Sideways energy is procrastinating.

- Sideways energy is the same meeting eight times in a row regarding the same idea that still has yet to be implemented.

- Sideways energy is having three sales to close and not calling them back because you are asked to help clean up the office for the Christmas party .

- Sideways energy is a staff handbook that collects dust but took hours to create.

- Sideways energy is an organizational system that takes 4 weeks to move a sale through the process because there is too much bureaucracy.

- Sideways energy is a meeting with no follow up, action plan, next steps or implementation that everyone knew would be a waste of time but no one was willing to say so. 

- Sideways energy is cleaning your office or cube instead of finishing the project that was due yesterday. 

- Paper shuffling is sideways energy.

- Dealing with the same problem multiple times is sideways energy.

- Too many cc’ed emails is sideways energy.

- Creating new policies for the company that everyone knows will never be implemented is sideways energy.

- Micromanaging is sideways energy. Lack of trust is sideways energy.

- Brown-nosing is sideways energy.

- Office politics is sideways energy.

And many times, the reason sideways energy becomes such a regular happening is because there is pressure coming from all sides within and around an organization- the very top, your boss, and those who you are leading. And the side seems to be the only place to find some relief and maybe focus on something, even if it is not the right thing to be focused on at the time. And growth can cause pressure that facilitates MORE sideways energy. Ultimately, this all leads to a lack of focus, which causes pressure because you choose not to deal with reality and instead want to focus on things that ultimately don’t matter.

How to combat sideways energy? First, realize it exists and will paralyze an organization. Second, identity it and deal with it. Third, measure your productivity and create a system that will help you determine how much sideways energy you are creating, both for yourself as well as for your team. And finally, be clear on your goals and what the right kind of energy looks like for your team- if you model the right kind of energy, your team will follow in the same direction. Ultimately, use common sense. Most of us can identify sideways energy in others, so being self aware and making sure we don’t allow ourselves to get caught up in sideways energy personally is really important.

1. Ruth Awogbade- founder of Magnify, staffer with Alpha, and editor of Alpha Life Magazine

2. Michael McDowell- NASCAR Sprint Cup and Nationwide series driver

3. Benjamin Grizzle- executive director, securities division at Goldman Sachs in London, writer and speaker

4. Katie Strandlund- founder of Dirty Work, creative management for creative minds

5. Larry Hubatka- creative pastor at Elevation Church in Charlotte

6. Eryn Erickson- founder of So Worth Loving, a community helping people pursue their dreams

1. Write everything down- never show up to a meeting without something to write with and something to write on. And write it down. Everything. Otherwise you’ll forget. I don’t care who you are.

2. Honor people’s time- show up early and finish on time.

3. Come with solutions, not just ideas- this is crucial. move towards completion, not away from it. Ideas are great, but have to lead towards the finish line.

4. Learn how to anticipate- be one step ahead. do something every day you weren’t “asked” or “told” to do, but know you should do.

5. Be a disciplined learner- understand it’s your role to be an expert, no matter what level or role you play in an organization. Don’t just be one step ahead of your boss in being skilled at your job…. be an expert.

6. Listen well- listen when in a conversation, don’t just think about what you are going to say in response. Listen for next steps, not current realities- this has to do with anticipating.

7. Reflect most of the credit, take all the blame- this is more for leaders, but still a great principle to put into practice no matter what level you are in the organization. Be a reflector of praise, not an absorber. Absorb the blame if at all possible.

8. Never speak negatively of your peers for personal gain- wow, this is a hard one for everyone. Especially when your boss or superior wants to pit you against that peer and see how you respond. Don’t give in to that. Stay above it.

9. Push back- almost every organizational leader I know wants their team members to challenge the process, question assumptions, bring new ideas to the table, and push back when they don’t agree. Don’t be afraid to do this. If your leader is not mature enough to take this, then they probably shouldn’t be in the position they are in. If unsure on whether you truly have “permission” to push back, ask for permission on the front end.

10. Take on more responsibility- ask for more power and involvement, and you’ll be lifting the load of your employer or boss. That is always a welcomed conversation. Always. Help by taking on more.

1. Use your 20′s to build a foundation for your 70′s. Create deep roots that will give you a foundation for when you are older. Finishing well means starting well.

2. Don’t worry about climbing the ladder. There’s no longer a ladder anyway. It’s more like one of those spiral staircases. And sometimes you are going across or down when you think you might be climbing. So don’t worry about it. Spend your 20′s learning and having life experiences. Travel, explore the world, take on projects that seem fun.

3. If your “career” path doesn’t make sense to anyone except for you, it’s okay. My 20′s: college at University of Oklahoma, wrangler on a guest ranch in Colorado, management consultant, business development officer, Magazine and media company, strategic business plan developer. Leadership development facilitator. WOW. That is all over the map. But God was orchestrating steps very clearly for what was next in my story. And continues to do so.

4. Be diligent and aggressive in developing your friendships and relationships. Create a core group of close friends who you want to do life with. This group may change a bit over the years, but it is imperative to find a circle of trust that you are committed to and they to you.

5. Figure out who you want to be, not what you want to do. Who you are is more important that what you do or where you live. Spiritually, financially, family, emotionally, relationally. Find two or three older, wise “sages” that you can learn from and count on as help.

6. Say yes to as much as you can. Your 2o’s are typically a decade with minimum responsibilities. So because of that, say yes to everything you can. Global mission trip… yes. Mentoring from a respected leader…. yes. Chance to learn from a top notch CEO…. yes. Spend a season working in London or Hong Kong or Sydney or New York… yes. You get the point. Pursue lots of opportunities- it will help you refine and define your calling.

I would argue that replacing yourself is one of the most challenging parts of leadership- Succession is really really difficult.

Succession, simply the transition of leadership or power, is very difficult for most companies or organizations. Whether a Fortune 50 like GE, Wal-Mart, or Apple; a non-profit like the Red Cross, Focus on the Family, or World Vision; a small startup or family held business; a church of 200 or 10,000; or one of the thousands of mid sized companies across the country. In any case, this is a tough leadership paradigm to get right.

Large companies put millions of dollars into making sure succession is smooth and seemless. Look at Apple- succession from Steve Jobs to Tim Cook has been difficult, and over the last year or so has possibly cost the company billions of dollars in market capitalization, and even more in brand equity. It is a huge issue for the long term health of any company.

Family held businesses or “founder-driven” organizations are really at risk of bad succession plans. Most founders of family held or not for profit organizations can’t let go, and drive everyone crazy around them. Especially in companies that are highly missional- founders are great at starting and building, but usually terrible at letting go and allowing the organization to grow into a second phase of organizational life without them, with a different leader at the helm.

Here in America, we do a really good job of succession when it comes to our President. It is a civil and democratic process. Not the case in other parts of the world, especially in third world and developing countries. Leaders hold onto power and do everything they can to stay in the seat of President or Prime Minister way long after they should be there. Usually because the power of their position corrupts their realities at the deepest levels. I believe this is one of the major issues for these countries- bad succession leads to internal strife, violence and disruptions in growth. These leaders not only hold onto to their power, but fail to develop any other leaders around them to take over.

What about you and your current leadership realities? Whether a team, a company, a non-profit, a church, a family held business, or a Fortune 50, you should be thinking about succession. How are you replacing yourself? If you are not thinking about this, you are neglecting a core part of your responsibility.

A few things to consider:

1. Is it time for you to replace yourself? Have the courage to always leave before you need to or have to.

2. Who are you grooming to step into your role? Start looking and grooming the next leader way sooner than you think you need to.

3. Does the organization or initiative need a fresh perspective and fresh eyes? Most of the time the answer is yes.

4. Power corrupts. Don’t let your power trip end up keeping you from correctly leading the organization into the next season of healthy organizational life.

5. Seek wisdom from inside and outside the organization. Seek counsel from trusted friends and advisors, as well as team members internally who can speak the truth.

6. The legacy of your leadership relies significantly on how well the organization continues to thrive after you are gone. Your replacement is a direct reflection of the quality of your leadership.