True story: One man marries and divorces 6 wives in 10 years.

True story: A woman tells 7 different dentists over 5 years that none of them know how to make good dentures.

True story: A business owner hires 5 marketing consultants in 7 years, yet the business continues to decline.

Question: What do the man, the woman, and the business owner have in common?

Are they unlucky in love, periodontal disease and commerce?

Or, are they willingly unwilling to find success?

The man in the first story is a terrible husband.

The woman in the second story is a lousy patient.

The business owner in the third story….well, you get the picure.

Moral: As you navigate the stormy waters of life, spend some time in self-examination. Failure isn’t a bad thing, as long as you can learn from it and apply what you’ve learned in the future.

The Flip Side

Question: What do the 6 wives, 7 dentists and 5 marketing consultants have in common?

Each of them likely ignored many warning signs that they were about to be engaged by an asshole.

Moral: As you strive for love and success, find a way to steer clear of people who refuse to be happy. This often involves trusting your gut feelings as well as your closest advisors. Sometimes that’s hard to do.

*In Ad-Writing 101 we learn that the purpose of the headline is to get you to read the next line. Did it work?

I’ve started hosting Worthless Bastards meetings every Friday at my office location in Tucson. My office is in a very cool place called Rail Yard. Stop by and say hello.

If you aren’t sure whether you’d enjoy a Worthless Bastard meeting, just read some of the info on the main web site at www.worthlessbastards.org.

Frankly, I think of these meetings as TED talks without the hassle of finding speakers and a stage.

Join our Tucson Worthless Bastards group on Facebook.

Perhaps I tend to read too much into the intent of the Prickly Pear. The one I sent to Roy was casting Quixotic shadow puppets. This one seems to be reaching out to slap me as I walk down the sidewalk.

A lot of people have asked about this whole Tucson thing. Why are you moving? Why Tucson? What’s the plan?

The “Why” is more complicated than the “What”, so I’ll explain the why over a glass of red when you come and visit me.

Here’s “what” I’ve found:

I’ve found that turning a page and opening up a new chapter in a life is scary, exhilarating, challenging, boring, depressing and fun.

The low points come in because we’ve chosen as a family to make the move over the next year, so it means some time alone. (I told you the “why” is more complicated).

The high points come in times of discovery. If you watched the videos in Roy William’s rabbit hole this week, you’ll see 2 different kinds of Tucson being presented. This first one is the Chamber of Commerce perspective.

And the second is a peek at the parts of Tucson that the Chamber would rather have you forget.

Of course, BOTH videos are accurate portrayals of the city. You can choose to focus on the cactus or you can focus on the shadow. Let me warn you, too much focus on the cactus, and all you’ll see are problems. Too much focus on a magical shadow and all you will see is fantasy.

WHAT I’m enjoying about Tucson is that reality-bitch-slap of the cactus at the top of this post. I’ve lived in a too-small town for entirely-too-long. It’s nice to stretch my wings for more than a 48-hour visit to a city on a consulting gig. I’m making Tucson my town.

Seriously, come on over for a glass of red.

When you’re ready to start telling your story, check out Shortcut Blogging.

photo: apple.com

The short lesson from this article about Apple’s retail experience is that if you want people to have a consistently good experience with your store, you must CONTROL everything. No element of your store’s experience should be left up to a random element of choice as decided by an hourly employee.

A 2007 employee training manual lays out the A-P-P-L-E “steps of service” with an acronym of the company name: “Approach customers with a personalized warm welcome,” “Probe politely to understand all the customer’s needs,” “Present a solution for the customer to take home today,” “Listen for and resolve any issues or concerns,” and “End with a fond farewell and an invitation to return.” It is reportedly still in use today.

Freedom comes on the other side of control. How are you controlling the experience in your store?