Bumbook

Top 10 Everyday Things People Do To Ruin Their Cars

2010-05-23T01:02:00.013-07:00

1. Not Using The Parking Brake

2. Not Coming To A Complete Stop Before Shifting

3. Riding The Brakes Down A Hill

4. Forgetting To Change The Oil

5. Pressure Washing The Engine

6. Starting Your Car The Wrong Way

7. Ignoring Your Car’s Sounds

8. Letting The Interior Go

9. Running Your Car Down To Empty

10. Driving Past Attractive Women

10 signs he's flirting with you

2010-05-23T01:02:00.011-07:00

1. The Eyebrow Lift
When a guy first sees a girl he's attracted to, chances his eyebrows will rise and fall. Quickly.
(You can slip the flip of an eyebrow back at him, if you're interested - it's a clear signal both ways.)

2. Gaining Your Attention
Exaggerated movements or gestures usually mean that he's trying to stand out from the crowd.
He may shift positions so that he is standing slightly apart from his friends or a group of people.

3. Slight Parting of the Lips
His lips may automatically part for a second when your eyes first meet.

4. His Nostrils Open Slightly - Face Widens
As his eyebrows raise and nostrils flare slightly so with the parted lips, he has an open, friendly expression on his face.

5. He Shifts to the Classic Male Courship Stance
The macho stance (cowboy style) - he'll probably lock his thumbs in his belt or belt loops, point his fingers downwards, spread his legs about shoulder distance apart and tilt his head to one side.

6. Touches His Own Face
He may rub his chin, brush his cheek with the back of his fingers or touch his ears.
(He may not realize this is a combination of nerves and unconscious preening behavior.)

7. Strokes His Shirt Front, Smoothes his Jeans
More unconscious preening - smoothing a shirt sleeve, tie, shirt pocket.
(The equivalent of the female lip lick.)

8. Fiddles with His Hair
He may smooth or tussle his hair involuntarily and more often than you might realize - again preening for you...

9. Eyebrows Arc While Talking
He may, accidentally, exhibit a slightly surprised expression with slightly raised eyebrows - which means he is interested in you.
(Forget the guy who looks at you with a smooth, relaxed brow and eyes - he thinks you're boring. You probably think he's boring so drop your eyebrows and more on.)

10. He seems especially nervous when he’s talking to you.

Top 10 Flirting Tips

2010-05-23T01:02:00.009-07:00

10. Flirting is an attitude:
A good flirt is self-confident and not afraid to take risks.
Be enthusiastic and positive, it works!

9. Start a conversation:
The best opening line is saying hello.
Talk about the surroundings, ask a question, ask for help, state an opinion.

8. Have fun:
Be playful, light-hearted and spontaneous.
Show your vulnerability.

7. Use props:
Never leave home without a prop.
Props are natural conversation starters. They encourage conversation and others will be compelled to start talking to you.
Great props include: dogs, kids, unusual jewelry, a irresistable scent, a sweatshirt with your favorite passion or personalized Hoodie with your Rhinestone Initial icon or T-Shirt with your Rhinestone Initial icon ties, Guy's Personalized Sweatshirt icon hats, or an interesting book or newspaper.

6. Be the host:
Change your behavior from the role of guest to host.
You are not the passive person in waiting, but rather the welcome committee.

5. Make the first move: Move closer to the person you want to meet.
Say hello!

4. Listen:
You have two ears and one mouth because you should listen twice as much as you speak.
Listening is a true art. Your flirting partner will be drawn to you.
Everyone loves to be heard.

3. Eye contact:
Make eye contact, but please look your partner in the eye gently (no more than 2-4 seconds) and then glance away.
Don't stare, it's a turn off.

2. Compliment:
Compliment your flirting partner. The best compliments have the element of surprise.
The "flirtee" will know that you really noticed them.
Remember, your compliments must be honest, sincere and genuine.
When you receive a compliment the best response is merely, Thank You!

1. Smile:
It is contagious.
It will make you so much more approachable.
A smile lights up your face and draws people to you. You will be a people magnet.

-written for giggles and lols-

10 Signs that He Likes You

2010-05-23T01:02:00.007-07:00

1. He remembers little things you mention in casual conversation.
It may take you by surprise. You might have been talking when he was around and two weeks later he'll say, "Well, you like orange fizz..."

2. His voice changes when he talks to you in a group. He may say "Hey." to everyone with you, but the "Hey." to you is a little different.

3. His voice gets softer when the two of you talk.

4. Sometimes he stares straight into your eyes.

5. His eyes get 'soft' when he looks at you. They change slightly or get relaxed around the edges. It's subtle, but you can tell if you watch...
(You may already be aware of it at a subconscious level - that's what made you start wondering if he likes you...)

6. When he's near you or talking with you, his eyes travel in a little circle around your face and land back on your eyes. (Like he's looking at your whole face - then back to your eyes.)

7. His friends start asking you questions - if you haven't met him yet - they may ask what your name is. Or may ask you what you think about 'him.'

8. If his friends are paying attention to you after he's been staring at you - it can mean that he's been talking about you.

9. He tells you that you smell nice...
(No hidden meaning here - it's a good thing.)

10. He might act weird around you or seem very nervous. His behavior may just plain change when you're around.

-written for giggles and lols-

The Simpsons Characters Look Alikes!

2010-05-23T01:02:00.005-07:00

Top 10 Lies Mommy and Daddy Told Me

2010-05-23T01:02:00.003-07:00

1. There is a Santa Claus, but he'll only visit you if you're good.

2. This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you.

3. Mommy and Daddy are taking a nap.

4. If you tell me the truth, you won't get in trouble.

5. Eating your vegetables will make you grow up big and strong

6. If you play with your privates too much, they'll drop off/you'll go blind.

7. If you keep making that face, your face will stay that way

8. Mommy and/or Daddy never took illegal drugs/drank underage/had premarital sex.

9. SpongeBob's not on this week/the TV is broken/our cable is out.

10. The stork brought you to us.

-written for giggles and lols-

25 Funny Ways To Describe Masturbation

2010-05-23T01:02:00.001-07:00

Taking the flute to band camp

Stuffing the pink taco

The five knuckle shuffle

Petting My Little Pony

Rub one out

Cleaning out the cobwebs

Yodel In the Canyon

Turn the knob

Tampering with the smoke detector

Buffin’ the muffin

Turning myself into a hand puppet

Basting the turkey

Practicing

Self-service

Flying solo

Feeling slap happy

Watering the flower

Priming the pump

All hands on deck

Cure for boredom

Tickle your fancy

Thumb a ride

Paddling the pink canoe

Preheat the oven

Staying in with BOB (battery operated boyfriend)

-written for giggles and lols-

Top 10 FML

2010-05-23T01:01:00.009-07:00

1. Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML

2. Today, I wanted to have a good lunch with my wife before fasting for my surgery which I may not survive, she decided getting her hair cut was more important. I ate alone. FML

3. Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. At that point I noticed my phone had fallen out of my pocket in the street and was run over by several cars. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

4. Today I noticed that my daughter was making funny noises which oddly resembled the sounds my wife makes in bed. When I asked her what she was doing she said "I'm pretending to be mommy from last night." I was on a business trip last night. FML

5. Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped
a pimple on his neck into my mouth. FML

6. Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML

7. Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to Itunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML

8. Today, I handed my PhD dissertation, which I have spent the past year researching and writing full-time. Last night, my roommate set an autocorrect on Word that changed "neither" to "nigger." I didn't notice until after I handed it in. My professor is black. FML

9. Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML

10. Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

10 Things Only Men Can Do

2010-05-23T01:01:00.007-07:00

No.1 - Age well

No.2 - F*** things

No.3 - Pee standing up

No.4 - Fertilize eggs

No.5 - Play real sports

Be honest; which of these would you prefer to watch: WNBA or NBA? NHL or women’s hockey? NFL or women’s rugby? MLB or softball?

`No.6 - Shave our heads

From Michael Jordan to David Beckham to Samuel L. Jackson guys wear bald better. Still need more proof? Just look at bald Britney.

No.7 - Navigate spatially

This explains why more men are math geniuses than women.

No.8 - Manscape

The playoff beard, the love canal, the Fu Manchu, and the goatee are strictly male innovations, and growing them are things only men can do.

No.9 - Hold our liquor

Men produce more of the protective enzyme alcohol dehydrogenase, which breaks down alcohol.

No.10 - Go topless

20 Things Women Can Do That Guys Can’t

2010-05-23T01:01:00.005-07:00

1. Get pregnant: Sure, guys contribute but they’ll never get as close (literally!) as we get to our own babies.

2. Fake it: Cue the famous scene from When Harry Met Sally. Enough said.

3. Ask for directions: We have no problem pulling over and asking for help. Consulting the GPS doesn't count either, boys.

4. Look sexy while sipping fruity cocktails: What guy do you know can look hot with a pink drink in his hand? Oh, and by the way, we look damn good drinking beer too.

5. Live longer: It’s a fact, women live five to ten years longer than men. Plenty of time to take a few more vacations, have a few more orgasms, and maybe hook another hubby.

6. Have multiple orgasms: No need for us to wait and, um, reload.

7. Multitask: We can talk to our BFF on the phone, while watching America’s Next Top Model and doing lunges. No sweat.

8. Get a new last name: Or just drop it all together, à la Fergie and Madonna.

9. Wear skirts: They keep us sooo much cooler in the summer than men’s shorts. Plus, a hot mini is sure to score us a few free drinks at the bar.

10. Get out of a speeding ticket: A little smile and a “Sorry, officer” is all it takes to get off scot-free.

11. Become a cougar, not a dirty old man: Sure, the idea of an older man sounds hot, but the reality is often a skeezy shmuck. Cougars, however, are fierce. Like: Demi Moore.

12. Wing it on the dance floor...convincingly: Guys will be so busy checking out your shaking booty, they won’t even notice you’re not a great dancer.

13. Wear high-heels: They add four inches to our height and make our legs look fab. Hey guys, what do your ratty old sneakers do for your physique?

14. Flirt with the bouncer: We bat our eyes at the doorman and get in the door with no cover charge. If a guy were to try it, we’re thinking he might get kicked out of line.

15. Blame it on PMS: Just say the words "cramp," "tampon" or “period” and men instantly let you have your way.

16. Grow out our hair: We miss a haircut appointment and our hair just looks longer and sexier. Guys miss theirs and they start looking like they’re homeless.

17. Cover up a zit: Both men and women are prone to blemishes, but one of the sexes has a multitude of concealers and creams at their disposal to cover them up.

18. Get aroused without the entire room knowing it: We don’t have to cross our legs or grab the nearest textbook whenever we get turned on in public.

19. Wear a thong: They make our ass look great and are a surefire way to turn on a guy. If a dude tried donning one, well, it would just look gross!

20. Get a manicure: Hanging at the nail salon is just a normal day for a woman. But a guy getting a mani/pedi is bound to get weird looks.

Top 10 Workout Songs

2010-05-23T01:01:00.003-07:00

No.10 - Wolfmother – “Joker & the Thief”

No.9 - Puff Daddy (featuring Notorious B.I.G.) – “Victory”

No.8 - Metallica – “Master of Puppets”

No.7 - Kanye West – “Stronger"

No.6 - Fort Minor – “Remember the Name”

No.5 - Daft Punk – “Harder Better Faster Stronger”

No.4 - AC/DC – “ThunderstrucK"

No.3 - LL Cool J – “Mama Said Knock You Out”

No.2 - Eminem – “Till I Collapse"

No.1 - Survivor – “Eye of the Tiger"

10 things guys wish girls knew - Shocking!

2010-05-23T01:01:00.001-07:00

1 Calling you on the phone does not mean what you think it means.

2 You are much prettier without all that makeup.

3 When you act spazzy and giggly, ifs seriously embarrassing.

4 Gossiping, whispering and writing notes make you look beyond shallow.

5 Boys worry about what you think of their hair, skin, weight and clothes.

6 PMS is no excuse to he mean.

7 Talking about your "big" butt is so boring.

8 Tight clothes look uncomfortable, cheap, and sort of desperate and insecure.

9 Most boys are looking for the right girl.

10 If you like him, just tell him.

10 things guys regret the most in their life

2010-05-23T01:00:00.003-07:00

No.10 - Not playing a team sport

No.9 - Not staying in touch with friends

No.8 - Not getting in a fight

No.7 - Not splurging on a badass car

No.6 - Getting married too soon

No.5 - Not sleeping with all willing parties

No.4 - Being a workaholic

No.3 - Ignoring your health

No.2 - Not spending enough time with dad

No.1 - Not going after the hot girl

69 Sweetest Things To Do With Your Girlfriend/Boyfriend

2010-05-23T01:00:00.001-07:00

1.   Back rubs/massages.

2.   French Kiss.

3.   Whisper to each other.

4.   Skinny dip.

5.   Hold hands.

6.   Buy gifts for each other.

7.   Roses.

8.   Find out their favorite cologne/perfume and wear it every time you're together.

9.   Kiss at every chance you get.

10.   Lightly kiss their collarbone and their jawbone just below the ear, then whisper I love you.

11.   Hugs are the universal medicine.

12.   Say I love you, only when you mean it and make sure they know you mean it.

13.   Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry etc.

14.   Tell her that she's the only girl you ever want. Don't lie.

15.   Spend every second possible together.

16.   Tell her that she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to. And mean it.

17.   Look into each other's eyes.

18.   Very lightly push up her chin, look into her eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.

19.   When in public, only flirt w/ each other.

20.   Put love notes in their pockets when they aren't looking.

21.   Buy her a ring.

22.   PDA = Public Display of Affection.

23.   Take advantage of any time alone together.

24.   Tell her about how you answered every question in math with her name.

25.   Let her sit on your lap.

26.   Lips were made for kissing. So were eyes, and fingers, and cheeks, and collarbones, and hands, and ears.

27.   Always hold her around her hips/sides.

28.   Hold her hand, stare into her eyes, kiss her hand and then put it over your heart.

29.   Unless you can feel their heart beating, you aren't close enough.

30.   Do cute things like write I love you in a note so that they have to look in a mirror to read it.

31.   Break every one of your parent's relationship rules for them.

32.   Make excuses to call them every 5 minutes.

33.   Even if you are really busy doing something, go out of your way to call and say I love you.

34.   Call from your vacation spot to tell them you were thinking about them.

35.   Ride your bike 8 miles just to see them for a few hours.

36.   Ride home and call them.

37.   Tell each other your most sacred secrets/fears.

38.   Brush her hair out of her face for her.

39.   Hang out with his/her friends.

40.   Learn from each other and don't make the same mistake twice.

41.   Everyone deserves a second chance.

42.   Make sacrifices for each other.

43.   Really love each other, or don't stay together.

44.   Let there never be a second during any given day that you aren't thinking about them, and make sure they know it.

45.   Love yourself before you love anyone else.

46.   Dedicate songs to them on the radio.

47.   Fall asleep on the phone with each other.

48.   Stand up for them when someone talks trash.

49.   Never forget the kiss goodnight. And always remember to say, "Sweet dreams."

21 Most Embarrassing Names in English

2010-05-23T00:59:00.013-07:00

Barb Dwyer

Pearl Button

Hazel Nutt

Ray Gun

Helen Back

Stan Still

Jo King

Lee King

Terry Bull

Mary Christmas

Ben Dover

Max Power

Paige Turner

Sonny Day

Harry Butt

Tim Burr

Teresa Green

Will Power

Anna Sasin

Chris Cross

Doug Hole

Justin Case

Barry Cade

Top 10 Weirdest Phobias

2010-05-23T00:59:00.011-07:00

10. Phobophobia
Fear of fear or fear of developing a phobia

How common is it? Don’t worry about it and you’ll be controlling the count…

9. Nephophobia
Fear of clouds

How common is it? Not very, but a strong concern among those on solar-powered life support…

8. Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia
Fear of long words

How common is it? Well, the White House is concerned, though we’re not sure whether that reflects a national crisis or a personal interest…

7. Cacophobia
Fear of ugliness

How common is it? Our informal research suggests it’s especially isolated around bars, sororities and the state of California…

6. Linonophobia
Fear of string

How common is it? Basically non-existent -- among cats, anyway…

5. Epistemophobia
Fear of knowledge

How common is it? We’re afraid we don’t know -- or is it that we’re happy we don’t know?

4. Vestiophobia
Fear of clothing

How common is it? Ever been to a European beach?

3. Arachibutyrophobia
Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth

How common is it? Are you kidding? One case is too common…

2. Papaphobia
Fear of the Pope

How common is it? Exceptionally prevalent in Guam -- don’t ask us why…

1. Panophobia
Fear of everything

How common is it? Tough to tell. Panophobes fear the question, fear answering the question, fear being chased by strangers for an answer -- it’s a no-win situation…

10 Funniest Photobombs Ever

2010-05-23T00:59:00.009-07:00

Funniest Car Licence Plates

2010-05-23T00:59:00.007-07:00

10 Funniest Protest Signs

2010-05-23T00:59:00.005-07:00

10 Pictures That You Can't Believe Are Not Photoshopped

2010-05-23T00:59:00.003-07:00

dare devil/stunt performer: Rick Rojatt

Another girl is standing on the other side. Left is a piece of mirror

Devil's Pool: water is relatively calm

Aqualand, Spain

Building in Paris

Horse was looking at the other side.

Adventures of Mr. Fly (although not photo-shopped but the fly is dead.)

Tricky Desktop Background

Zebroid: Cross between a zebra and horse

Funniest Facebook Status Updates

2010-05-23T00:59:00.001-07:00

10 Company Logos That Will Make You LMFAO

2010-05-23T00:58:00.003-07:00

Hundred Year Old Woman With Horn (You Will Not Believe Your Eyes!!!)

2010-05-23T00:58:00.001-07:00

10 Funniest Overheard Convos

2010-05-23T00:54:00.001-07:00

Guy (to a young boy outside a dorm): Is this a have-to-pee dance? Do you need to pee right now? Okay, wait, wait, wait, first we pull down our pants, and then we pee. First pants, then...
Boy: (Wets himself and begins to cry)
Guy: That's okay. Sometimes I get the steps mixed up too.

-Simon Fraser University

Guy: That Motherfucking Cop has driven past here twice in the last fifteen minutes.
Cop: (On car's loudspeaker) I'm not a motherfucker.

- tailgating at baxter and milledge

Protestor: What do you think of abortion?
Guy: I'm a guy. I don't have an opinion.
Protestor: If you were forced to pick sides?
Guy: I'd say late term ones are OK.
Protestor: How late?
Guy: I'd say no later than after they are 20 years old.
(Protestor's jaw drop)
Guy: You don't know if they are worth a shit till they are like 18, then ya figure a year or 2 to decide if you want to keep them.

-Tate Center

(Teacher puts a giant photo of vagina on overhead)
Camera Phone: (click)

- Biology

Seven-year-old boy, turning to gaze at young woman's two-tone pumps: I want them shoes, man!
Mother, pulling him by the hand: Come along, Jake.

-Crotona Ave & Fordham Rd

A young girl to her parents at a look out at the Grand Canyon: When can we stop looking at this big hole in the ground?

-Grand Canyon

Guy 1: well, i wasn't really sure. I mean, it looked like a scab, and it felt like a scab.
Guy 2: Did it taste like a scab? Because that's how you know.

-college

Guy 1: That chick yesterday was so hot. What was her name?
Guy 2: John.

-college cafeteria

Guy 1: Half the pickles on my screen are fucked up.
Guy 2: Pickles?
Guy 1: Uh Pixels.

-High School Computer Lab

Guy 1: Dude, did you get a haircut?
Guy 2: Yeah, pretty drastic, more than three inches.
Guy 1: Kinda like my circumcision.

Guy 1: You're in love.
Guy 2: Shut up, no I'm not. You're in love too! I mean, not too. Shit.