Burnt by the Tuscan Sun

What does an Italian Groundhog look like?

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 14:22:00 +0000

A blackbird.

Turns out, while Americans wait and see if a groundhog will see its shadow, the Italians have their own mother nature equivalent. I giorni della merla - The blackbird's days which fall on the last three days of January and indicating the coldest days of winter. And although weathermen report that there are (often) days much colder, the legend has stuck.

But leave it to the Italians and their gift for gab and you'll find that the legend has now morphed into a number of different tales, to be recalled by future generations, depending on your point of view. So, pick your tale:

I. During a very cold winter in Milan's Porta Nuova (I like this, my old stomping grounds)...a family of white birds took refuge in a courtyard of a palazzo. The father could not find food due to the cover of fallen snow. It kept right on snowing, so the father bird decided to fly out of the snowstorm looking for food. Before he left, he settled the mother & three baby birds near a smokestack for warmth. Able to return only after the storm had passed (3 days), he found his family black with soot. The sun came out in February, marking the end of winter, but by then even the papa bird had turned black and from then on, blackbirds were born.

II. ...It was so cold that the family - unable to even flap their wings - perched its nest atop the smokestack. Finally, after three days they could fly away - but by that time the white birds had turned black, and from that point on, the blackbird came to be.

III. This version becomes more dark (in tutti sensi): The papa bird left his family inside the chimney, and went out to search for food. Upon his return, finding his mate all black, he didn't recognize her and left. She died of hunger.

IV. Two young blackbirds return to the hometown of the young female in order to marry, situated beyond the Po River. Afterwards, once they left for home, back over the river, it got to be too late and too cold. So they spent two days more nearby with relatives. On the third day, their next attempt, it was so cold that the male died -- and that's why today you can still hear the lament of the female along the Po river each end of January.

One astute blogger reported the actual temperature indications. In fact, they found that:

The average temperature of the three days in question is 3.6 degrees celsius, while the average of all of January is 2.8 degrees. At nearly 1 degree more, it "proves" that legends and tall tales are just that, indeed.

Nonetheless, be sure to throw an extra blanket on your bed just to be sure...

Italy Strikes: Just what are they (all) on about?

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 15:23:00 +0000

Italy has been hit not just by mild earthquakes, but rolling strikes by seemingly every single category of worker and (non) across the country. Even the indignados showed up at Parliament to put there own take on the problems befalling our broken system. The only people, of course, who haven't complained (so far) are the Parliamentarians, still grossly overpaid, outnumbering their foreign counterparts by 2 to 1, and outrageously detached from the populace. As gas stations, pharmacists, trains, taxis, truckers and more stop their work and take to the streets, Italy is starting to feel as though we're engaged in our very own intifada. There's even police violence to put them in their place, as we witnessed with the fishermen marching on parliament as well.

So, let's take a look at our PM's efforts to bring Italy into the liberalized world of work and see what everyone's complaining about. [Everybody except the body that gives itself raises in the face of budget cuts, allows for never-ending perks, and goes against the law by deciding that those assisting the mafia are okay to serve as well. With the Mafia Inc. the number one business in Italy, at least they can say they're pro-business].

- Adding 5000 more pharmacies / As I state in my book, you would be forgiven for thinking that those neon green crosses were a modern update to the holy shrines found on nearly every street corner. Turns out, there are not enough of them. And the govt's going to make it easier to open one. Pharmacists protest that it would ruin their profession.
- The govt wants to add more notaries as well, simplify some procedures, and improve competition in the auto insurance industry by forcing cos. to provide competing tariff information (I'd love to see how that's going to play out).
- They no longer wish to enforce min/max tariffs for lawyers as long as you are forewarned of the charges and they do want to enforce max bank charges and a ceiling on highway taxes, which today is the very definition of highway robbery.
On the whole, I think it looks like liberalization and keeps govt out of private companies & prof'l offices. Correct me if I'm mistaken.
- Adding to the pot, the govt wants more taxi licenses - unleashing the equivalent of the wrath of God - when, in fact, they should spend money on taxis by giving them all a crash course in Supply & Demand.
- The petroleum cos. and truckers are pissed over liberalizing gas contracts, meaning any gas station, despite its name, can buy from any supplier. They're also keen on breaking up the supply chain to add to more competitiveness. Gas stations will also be able to sell products in a mini-market, which I believe has the added consequence of pissing off retailers. They will no longer have limits on the number of self-service stations either. As for this last one, I have no idea why it was in place in the first place.
- The govt may win its battle on allowing shops to open / close when they want to, doing away with the siesta in the interim, but retailers won their war against allowing anyone to hold sales and offer product discounts whenever they want to. They - incredibly - believe if that were the case, the large outlets and mega-stores would hold sales all year round and put them out of business.
Little do they realize that those stores are already putting them out of business, and, those companies, with such low margins cannot readily afford sales 365 days per year...Once again, for a quickie course in Economics 101 is called for.
- And finally, the govt wants to put an end to nationalized work contracts (e.g., you're paid for your category whether you're an engineer in Lucca or Lecce). This is an effort to liberalize the labour pool, allowing people to negotiate their pay & perks directly with the company they're looking to work for. Naturally, this has put in a tail spin every single person that does not make up any of the above categories, starting with train people. The workers argue that without a govt mandate, companies will start bringing salaries down to nothing as jobs are so hard to come by. That's true, but eventually, the companies are going to need to attract people too.

As Mario Monti stated (a bit more eloquently than here), "I hope I've pretty much pissed everyone off."

It certainly is starting to look that way.

Italy's Horseracing Sector - Off course by a length?

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 15:13:00 +0000

This, too, was once an Ippodromo Race Course
LET'S NOT DESTROY HORSERACING!

While the world has been buzzing over the sinking of the Concordia, while those of us in Italy are experiencing the rolling strikes of taxi drivers, now pharmacists, then truckers, lawyers and gas stations in protest of the government's austerity package, there's been one group on strike and seemingly getting nowhere fast: the horse racing industry. But this poster doesn't just reveal what's wrong with the horse race sector of Italy, it's a poster advertising what's wrong with almost the entire country's approach to each and every sector:

First, let's ignore (if you can, without scratching your head in a WTF moment) the idea that an empty field - the late great Circus Maximus - was once a race course track. Once again, resorting to "our glory days" - and here, evoking the Greatness of Roma: Caput Mundi. Too bad we have to go back to centuries before our own calendar even started for show-and-tell. I get it: let's not abandon our race tracks and leave them in ruins.
But, showing me a popular tourist attraction - no longer in use - and attracting more people than the modern-day race tracks -- in my opinion isn't the best way to go about doing this.

Where are the race tracks? Family days at the races? Competitions like the Kentucky Derby? Name that foal? Go to the wiki on Horse Racing, and under Italy you find only a mention of the Palio, a race held twice a year and lasting only 30 seconds at that. I love the races, the San Siro stadium in Milan, but have rarely set foot inside - more often to admire the magnificent bronze horse of Leonardo gracing its entranceway out front. Like much in Italy, unless you're in the know (or follow the cultural bloggers - who work for free) the world at large knows nothing of the exceptional cultural offerings taking place nearly every second across the boot.

Next, we have the appeal to the government to step in & save the day. Keeping 15000 horses from the butcher's block, and maintaining many a worker. Instead of employing marketing techniques, school programs and user-friendly websites to keep things going, just throw more good money after bad. People wait for the government to give money to make movies, the government to pay for theaters and opera houses, and a host of other cultural events. So much of it is so ill-spent it's absolutely criminal. The Italian people cough up money so that those on the receiving end can live high on the hog, improve their vast art collections, and do a number of things that have nothing to do with actually producing or promoting their venue.
Italian generosity also keeps these low-funded but culturally phenomenal concerns from stepping up to the plate and fundraising, sensitizing the public, building trustees, investing in their own improvements and more. If they did these things, waiting for a handout would not be even considered an option.

Finally, we have the strikes and street protests. Too bad it's the first time I ever saw the horses make their way into the public arena. More of this to promote their races (okay, it might be illegal) and maybe they wouldn't need to take to the streets begging people to pay attention. If they had just added signs, race times and cards of horse's names... maybe people would actually take the time to check them out.

But, let's go back to the Glory Days. As I stated before in my entry on strikes, the theory goes...because we were once great, we can lose touch with our professional prowess, ignore the potential customers, run things as if it were a private club, not allow any new blood (and here I'm thinking of the Arabs who saved Kentucky), not invest in new and better ways to do things...

After all, we were once the great Made in Italy brand. And that should be reason enough to expect the throngs to keep coming.

Concordia's Deep Throat

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 14:21:00 +0000

The tragedy of the Concordia has been rocking the airwaves and bandwiths for days now, each day bringing out new revelations. But for every bit of news that goes reported, it seems that it gives rise to even more questions. So true also in the case of the mystery Moldavian who was hunkering down in Moldavia after jumping ship and skedaddling as fast as her dancer's legs could take her. But the most pressing question, in the first days of the tragedy was...How could this have happened?! We've been met with a captain's smorgasbord of explanations ever since.
A friend who was holed up at Rome Airport’s Hilton Hotel with many of the crew members all last weekend simply asked them the next obvious question: “So what was really going on there?” Little did she know before it broke at the UK's Telegraph that the word on the street was that our wonder-boy was most likely banging a “Russian whore” on the bridge before banging his boat into the hard rock basin below the Island of Giglio. That's not true. Turns out, she's Moldavian. A former "dancer" for Costa lines. Perhaps in the way Berlusconi's Egyptian princess, Ruby Rubacuore (Heartstealer) is also a dancer?
I, for one, do not believe the Italian macho press when it states it was she who "egged him on" to go closer & closer to the shore -- in the land of the Papacy, ahhh...don't we love a modern-day Eve?   After all, the videotapes of the bridge have yet to be released. It would make much more sense that he was trying to impress her by taking his boat so close to the island.
In fact, as he approached, he jokingly asked the Commodore (by phone, and the man Schettino had purportedly wanted to salute), "Got water?" Talk about famous last words.  Can't wait to see that on a t-shirt.
From the get-go, no one has believed Captain Schettino’s version of events. Especially his last alibi, "I tripped and fell into a life boat". Hundreds trying to get into those boats didn't make it in...He goes onto say he was stuck in his little dinghy - not able to jimmy the boat down into the water...So much for his mariner's skills at that.
But doesn't that make a convenient excuse for explaining your absence? It'll go down in the annals of history alongside "The dog ate my homework."
I'm going with my version instead: Perhaps he had jettisoned off the boat to make sure his “lady friend” would be on land before being found out -- a Poseidon Adventure version of having your wife come home while you’re in bed with your lover, so you shimmy her out the window to make a clean escape.

He also supposedly called a taxi, but never took one (reports vary). Perhaps the taxi driver can shed a bit more light onto who his passenger was? It would explain his absence and his presence on a lifeboat when people were anxiously trying to jump ship from the prow.
Nonetheless, the audacity of Schettino's admission makes the entire disaster even more senseless. It also certainly explains the stunned reaction of our Captain once he was caught knee deep in it – and with his pants down.

Schettino, for his part, was only following in the example of our former Prime Minister who had come to love the brazen mixture of power, money, whores, spectacle and thumbing your nose at the rules. In fact, both men started out in life on cruise ships. It comes as no surprise at least to this observer that, at first accosted by the Coast Guard Commander and later upon arrest, our Captain Coward denied everything just like Silvio -- right down even to the existence of the rocks that has torn more than his boat apart.

Captain Coward and the Sinking of the Concordia

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 10:43:00 +0000

There has been so much excellent commentary combined with a whole lot of conjecture on this terrible incident, I didn't want to weigh in on what seems to be a singular act of bravado by a seriously inept commander. Usually, guys love to show off. But when Evil Knievel jumps over a cliff, or a motocross racer does it, they usually only put themselves in danger (save for the spectators down below).
Many people find it compelling to compare the Italian disaster with the Titanic, whose 100th Anniversary is this April. I don't think that's foolish journalism. If we are to believe Cameron's depiction of the causes behind the sinking (it wasn't the iceberg, btw), it was the ship owner's desire to arrive in New York's harbor ahead of schedule. Speed was the cause, and once they saw the iceberg it was simply too late. No boat or plane can be protected from sheer chutzpah (and I refuse to use the term, "human error" - "spectacularly poor judgment" would be a lot more accurate) by a guy showing off at the helm. Furthermore, if this act of bravado had taken place off the coast of say, Iceland or Newfoundland, we would be mourning a lot more than the 30 or so who are dead or still missing.
What I find remarkable about the entire fiasco is - believing the Captain's statements made - that he "...Didn't know or didn't think there were rocks so close to the Port of Giglio." Or his statement of today, that once he realized he was too close, it was too late to maneuver a tidy 8-story city out of harm's way.
Anyone who has ever swum or rowboated or kyacked around any island can tell you...there are rocks in shallow waters surrounding it as you go out to sea. But, don't take my word for it: Captain Schettino could have just meandered into the Aquarium in Genova - the port town where his boat docks - and studied an entire topographical representation in amazing detail of the ocean floors covering our beautiful blue planet. He could even have skipped the lines, the Aquarium is owned by Costa - the same Company which owns his sunken ship. For the map image, click on the link here and look at page 2 of the pdf file.
However, judging by comments on online news pages worldwide, many are blaming the "bumbling Italians". When it comes to our skipper, nothing could be further from the truth. Italians - like the Greeks before them - have been sailing the seven seas long before other humans dared venture off the land [you can insert here your own metaphor on commandeering sinking ships]. Shipping companies, cruise ships and ferry operators worldwide are often manned by all-Italian crews. Their skippers and engineers are flawless. Bravery - and usual calm under pressure is legend (unfortunately not employed by the Italian Coast Guard Captain in his - rightfully placed - extreme frustration) and can be seen in the countless examples of their soldiers and Carabinieri stationed in Iraq & Afghanistan and in hot spots 'round the world.
When it came to "organization" of the rescue effort, certainly I would fault the captain and his crew. Misleading announcements picked up by the Spanish couple egressing from their cabin (they prod the crew member, "If it's an electrical outage, why are you wearing a life jacket?!!) and the fact that half the lifeboats where on the side that was listing into the water would reap havoc on any emergency procedures. But, is this justifiably due to Italian disorganization? Although I dedicate an entire chapter in my book to disorganization, Hurricane Katrina and the fiasco of America's emergency services in that disaster come to mind...or the response of BP in the Gulf of Mexico, which was entirely English, indeed. The reason why Captain Sullenberg of the Hudson River landing is so famous is that that kind of cool and outcome in such extreme circumstances is so totally unusual. [I might add that his boss, the head of USAirways was a total pig-headed idiot when it came to his response].
Nonetheless, for Captain Schettino ("Rollerskate" in English), this is one instance when "rockering" doesn't make for a swift and easy maneuver - and a move that he'll not get out of anytime soon.

For some other good reads, click on these links below (some in Italian):

http://news.yahoo.com/italian-cruise-capt-francesco-schettino-biggest-idiot-2012-211000948.html

http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2012/01/17/145366815/facing-disaster-what-is-a-ships-captain-expected-to-do?ft=1&f=1001&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=pulsenews
http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/01/18/us-italy-ship-crew-idUSTRE80G1D120120118
http://www.ft.com/intl/cms/s/0/2f1f39a8-4110-11e1-b521-00144feab49a.html#axzz1jufrjaTr

http://www3.lastampa.it/cronache/sezioni/articolo/lstp/438730/ (article in italian)

It takes a village...

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 18:07:00 +0000

The Italians have a wonderful expression for when something happens someplace which is identical in breadth and scope of a happening somewhere else -- Tutto il mondo è un paese - The whole world is a village.
And so it was, while reading my Detroit Free Press, I was reminded of this when 44 yr old white collar thug Brian Marsack risks being sent up the river for ripping off the elderly of their life savings. His response? "They were old and didn't need the money anyway." Like Madoff, I guess he was a better financial planner - he was planning for his retirement more responsibly.
It's a sad start to a New Year but one that always brings me back to fine Italy. Here (and everywhere, I imagine) it is a national sport for faux utilities personnel to get into the homes of the elderly and rob them blind after stunning them or knocking them out with chloroform of some sort. Others prey on seniors by pretending to know them or their offspring, and then happily escort them to a bank machine for money their relative purportedly needs.
Recently, two Neapolitan criminals received 15 years in jail each for killing an elderly American tourist just for his Rolex--the man had simply set out to visit the city from a cruise ship nearby. We are constantly hearing reports of people being pulled to their deaths for their purses or necklaces in street crimes by fast-moving criminals (often on scooters). And although a friend of my great aunt's once grabbed the necklace off the man who had grabbed hers -- he got a fake gold necklace, she ended up with the real thing -- these stories usually don't have such happy endings.
Luckily, many elderly are growing more and more aware of the perils of these sorts due to outing the scams on TV shows. But sadly, like the family featured in the Detroit article, many of them get ripped off by the people they know best. In fact, the article goes on to state that:

"A 2009 study by MetLife says seniors are cheated out of $2.6 billion each year, and the perpetrator is likely to be a relative or caregiver.

The study estimates that for every case that's found, there are likely four more cases that went undetected."

The article offers a few pointers for seniors such as: Do not give information such as Social Security numbers and bank account information over the phone and Be wary of charities asking for money, even if they sound legitimate. I would add a few of my own: ignore letters or emails saying you've won money, seek advice on business deals - even if thru a good friend or relative, and never open the door to strangers.

Wherever you may live. As the saying goes, the whole world is just a village.

And the Winner is...Burnt by Tuscan Sun Giveaway

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 20:55:00 +0000

As I had announced on my Facebook page, Blogger Michelle (& co-host of the terrific podcast show Eye on Italy) from Bleeding Espresso reviewed my book and offered a free book to the best story of someone's first Italian memory or their wish for a first-time visit in Italy. She collected some terrific stories on her book review page. Keeping in theme with my book, I have featured some of my favorites below. As I wrote in my book (and in the Chi Sono? section of my blog) my first trip to Italy was at 4 mths old so no memories from then. But it was the maniacal mix of pain & pleasure that kept me coming back for more.
So, enjoy -- and, feel free to add your own first-time memories of Bell'Italia!

Saretta / My very first minutes in Italy were not auspicious. Upon arriving at the Bari airport the customs agents tore my whole suitcase apart and I was barely able to get everything back in and close it. The school where I would be teaching had sent a student to pick me up at the airport and his car was so small my suitcase wouldn’t fit in the trunk. The rather unfriendly fellow, quite obviously put out about being elected to pick me up, dumped me off in front of the apartment building that was to be my home and said, here are the keys, goodbye! I didn’t know what floor I lived on, how to work the elevator, who I would be living with, where the school was…Things soon got even worse, but eventually got better…obviously, because that was in 1990 and I’m still here! saretta´s last post . . . Yin-Yang You

Pauline / My first two trips to Italy didn’t really give me any particular positive feelings about Italy: the first time I set foot in the country was at age 15 on a schooltrip to Rome…..a lot of churches…..too many for a 15 year old; second time interrailing at 18….the problem wasn’t Italy though but rather the heavy rucksack and the tent….

Subconsciously however these trips must have made a good impression, because I’ve been living in Italy for 10 years now!!!

Amy / I haven’t been, but when I do go, my first memory will be (knowing me) the food.

Megan / I had to change trains at the French/Italian border, in Ventimiglia. It was apparent I was in a whole other country – if not on a whole other planet! – the second I stepped off the train. There are a few tell-tale signs you are in Italy…

1. The policemen are in a cluster, chain-smoking, usually in the vicinity of a sign that says “no smoking,” and making no secret about the fact that they are trying to figure out your figure under that coat.

2. The train platform has a restroom, smoking lounge, and chapel.

3. There actually are old ladies in black dresses ready to shake their fist and yell at you…loudly. (I still can’t figure out what she thought could have been wrong with my biglietti, biglietti, BIGLIETTI!!!)

The fact that all these stereotypes actually happened to be true blew my ever-loving mind! Oh my gosh, I was so excited!!! No doubt the fact that I was smiling ear to ear only encouraged the police officers and befuddled the old lady. Cont'd on bleeding espresso page...

And the winner is...in the spirit of Burnt by the Tuscan Sun...(insert drum roll...)

Chef Barbie / My most vivid memory of italy would be coming around the corner to the piazza di trevi and thinking to myself, “shouldn’t i be hearing the water splashing in the fountain by now?” and then seeing the fountain sitting there empty. it was monday morning so the fountain had been drained for cleaning and coin collection. i had to come back around later that day to see the fountain in all its glory.Chef Barbie´s last post . . . Culinary School – Q6 Week 4 LatinChef Barbie...Enjoy your free copy of Burnt by the Tuscan Sun! For the rest of you...Available on Amazon or receive a signed copy when ordering directly from my blog page thru paypal - posted on the right hand column.

Hanging up on the Telecoms Cos.

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 19:04:00 +0000

I don't know if you happened to notice it, but it seemed to me that as 2011 was wrapping up, companies worldwide were doing their best to ~~defraud customers~~ errr...I mean make their budgets before the New Year. I wanted to pen a blog about one company and how I was being taken for a ride when three more would come onto my radar (and into my wallet) just for good measure. Not knowing where to begin, I thought I'd start my first entry with our nefarious telecoms companies, who, like taxis worldwide find all kinds of ways to separate you from your money.
But first let's start off with the good news: My brother in Switzerland and my sister in the USA are joining the millions of people who are getting rid of their landlines, primarily due to exorbitant monthly charges and harassment by telephone sales vendors. In my anti-telecoms crusade, I truly believe that this is just another way for companies to shake us down -- After all, I can call landlines for next to nothing (16 cents a CALL) while we're all being charged gazillions per minute to reach cellphones. Nonetheless, I see their point and am wholly fed up with the sales calls as well.
Incredibly, my telephone company Wind/Infostrada let me know with each call to their offices that I could register to get my number taken off those sales call lists. Well, today, after my fifth uninvited sales call, I decided to finally register to be taken off the lists and eccolo! I found in my inbox a groovy email telling me how to go about doing just that.

Click here to register via email - tel - fax - web

And in under a minute I was good to go (or so I think). In fact, anyone in Italy can register here so click away (you don't have to be an Infostrada client). In Switzerland, you can't even take your name off the list and in the USA, where companies are people too, I think it's pretty much a free-for-all.

I had (stupidly) switched from Wind/Infostrada to Vodafone Station this past summer. That was the summer in which I no longer needed to worry about pestering from telephone sales people, because from the moment I changed carriers, I could no longer make or receive calls. Desperate pleas to "customer disservice" (which by all accounts is usually fairly good, excepting for the heavy metal music they blast in your ear while on hold) got me nowhere. I switched back to the tune of some €80 or more for changing carriers (note: a charge that was outlawed so now shows up as something else - applying a bit of corporate savvy just like those U.S. credit card cos.).

And although problems with navigation due to being a Mac user tripped me up for awhile, who cared? I was getting 16 cents a call! [again, the "customer disservice" dept told me it was my fault for owning a Mac but I resolved the issue by contacting the modem producer for assistance -- in Australia].

Shortly thereafter, I was presented with two humongous phone bills from Vodafone. Extra charges aside, my bills had tripled in the two months I could barely make or receive calls. What happened?

Carriers cannot distinguish between most U.S. cellphone numbers and landlines. That's because Americans use the same area codes for both. So unless you call someone who is roaming, it is as if you are calling a landline. Nonetheless, I am always careful to call landlines only. Regardless, Vodafone took it upon themselves to treat all calls as if I were making an international cellphone call for each and every one of them.

Back to the "customer disservice" dept, I was told there was nothing they could do. Following my first rule of advice for Life in Italy (it's in my book, believe me), Never take 'No' for an answer, I managed to speak with someone in the accounts dept. They told me that the praxis was that they would credit the amount only when a customer called in to complain. I told them it was for these types of disservices that I was no longer a client of theirs.

Rather than take it on my honor and charge me for landline rates, here we were...back to the cat&mouse game of Telecoms operators and their phone charges.

I don't know about you, but my New Years Resolution? Always check the utilities bills. And double check them again. You cannot believe how a little off the top times millions of customers makes for a Happy New Year to the Telecoms Operators.

Italy: A Year in Review

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 16:49:00 +0000

To conclude my monthly Tante Belle Cose feature of all good Italian things, this year I thought I'd offer my own highlights of the year that has just expired. There was lots to celebrate but here is my brief recap, month by month (note: many items in color and/or bold are live links):

December 2011
Of course the Big News of the month was that Burnt by the Tuscan Sun - the book came out which took the world by a storm...! Don't I wish--you can try & win a signed copy by posting to blogger Bleeding Espresso's contest (click here).
Parmalat's Thief-in-Chief, Mr. Tanzi got 9 years in jail (18 in some reports - boh?!) for his part in hiding the money under his mattress along with his master paintings collection.
TV presenter Mike Bongiorno's remains were uncovered. Perhaps I should say that differently. His stolen remains (still in the casket) were found and returned to the family who says they didn't pay the piper for them...Either way, we're happy he can rest in peace (and in one piece).
The year came to a spectacular finish with fireworks displays taking place all over Rome, and a huge concert & party in Piazza Venezia. Milano was the party-pooper by outlawing the fireworks due to smog, but I'd be happy if it was due to budget tightening regardless.

November 2011
The world applauded at the news of Berlusconi finally stepping down as Prime Minister. But, as he's threatened, and as I've consistently stated, he may be down but he is not out of the Italian political scene (or imbroglio, as the case may be). Hopefully, in 2012 the judiciary can take care of that, but...don't hold your breath. He has very deep pockets.
After yet another pedophile scandal erupted across Ireland, the country closed its embassy to the Holy See, citing financial reasons. Or, maybe it was the smog from the smokescreen lofted by Bishops worldwide over their handling of the pedophiles in their flock. Either way, it marks a huge schism in Catholic circles.

Italian women's sports chalked up yet another victory, this time winning the Volleyball World Cup.
Businessman & Alfa Romeo/Ferrari Man Montezemolo finally cut thru the red tape and launched Italo, his shiny red NTV trains to compete with Trenitalia. While competition is a good thing, don't expect any major cuts in ticket prices. It doesn't take a brain surgeon to check your competitor's prices online and keep them fixed there.

October 2011

picture from Quest for Nirvana

I was thrilled to take part in the 14th Edition of WIN-Women Int'l Networking Global Leadership Conference which took place in Rome. 1000 Career women, top executives & just an inordinate amount of energy took Rome by a storm, but not that the all-male politicos & industry leaders took any notice. Rome's City Govt continued battling the law to allow an almost all-male team of leaders, Milan's Expo flaunted their 42 all-male managers, & most political parties outlined their visions of renewal with all-male tickets.

Italy's Women's Beach Volleyball garners the Silver in the Continental Cup. Not that anyone was looking.

Savvy new media marketing maven, film producer & newfound friend Sarah Marder launches the completion phase of her documentary, The Genius of a Place covering issues of sustainable tourism & focused on Cortona, Italy. Sarah&Co. reached their goal of raising $20,000 at the stroke of midnight on Dec 31st, but you can still contribute to their enterprise & get bragging rights on what we believe will be an Oscar film! Every penny counts.

September 2011

"Talent Scount" and Berlusca "Madam" Lele Mora gets thrown in the slammer for fraud & bankruptcy claims despite Berlusconi's paying his buddy millions of euros simply for being a buon amico...

Italy's Census starts shocking the homogenous Italians out of their stupor by reminding them there are immigrants in their midst.

A terrific movie, Terraferma opens revealing results of said census. Click here for a review in hollywoodreporter.

Italians discover their researchers have a hand in Geneva's CERN particle accelerator, even those laboring far away in Abruzzo. And then-Minister of Education (and barely graduated) Gelmini claims that the tunnel linking the two labs was finally completed, showing that it's not just Americans who are geographically challenged.

August 2011

Of course, the season brings the best in Jazz Festivals, concert series, sagre of every gastronomic delight, and all kinds of happenings throughout the country. Not a town is still.

Tourists in Rome are given free water bottles to handle the hot metro (subway) system. Although this news seems to be steeped in controversy - as some say it ain't so.

July 2011

A huge statue of Roman Emperor Caligula is recovered & returned to the town of Nemi. And you can read about his sex life in my Irreverent Italy section above, in the outlandish book entitled Sex Lives of the Roman Emperors

Olympian Swimmer Federica Pellegrini breaks a world record & along with diver Tania Cagnotto are the first Italians to win in 4 consecutive events. Are we paying attention to the bold & outstanding women of the Bel Paese yet?

June 2011

Although events have been taking place all year, we finally celebrate 150 Years of the Unification of Italy in full force. Our embarrassment-in-chief outdoes himself by touching the King of Spain in order to grab his attention.

Silvio's childhood buddy Lucio Stanca, the IBM man who ran through 42 million euro to create the defunct $4.99 italy.it website resigns from Milan Expo 2015, aka the Backscratch Bazaar. Too bad the other 41 men managers are still in place.

Since it's a year of unification, we got to witness the reopening of the (finally) unified Barberini Palace or Rome's National Gallery of Art. Stupendous. Take time to enjoy the gardens as well.

And, while we're on the subject of art, the Vatican Museums reached out to new visitors by opening guided tours for the deaf, and a route using braille & bas-relief for those with limited sight.

Italy's water nymphs collect another medal, this time silver, in water polo.

Italians throttle the government's attempts to hand out contracts to cronies for public water, nuclear energy, and a host of other initiatives on the referendum. In response, Berlusconi's Ministers say that they will not let the public dictate their law-~~breaking~~ - errr...making.

May 2011

Milan elects a left-wing Mayor, signs of tarnish appearing in Berlusconi's shiny facade (and I don't just mean the glow from his forehead and hair dyes).

April 2011

The first audience takes place for Silvio's soliciting prostitution from a minor, in the Ruby Heartstealer trial. Not that it's actually going to go anywhere, but it makes for fun reading.

The movie about the last days of my favorite Italian author, Tiziano Terzani and the cycle of life, La fine è il mio inizio opens.

March 2011

The cute FIAT '500 hits American roads (and the Gucci model coming out in flying colors not far behind).

February 2011

Italian women finally are fed up and take to the streets in the hundreds of thousands in the first national (& even int'l) protest of its kind, Se non ora, Quando?

I got to climb atop the rooftops of Rome's City Hall perched above the Capitoline Hill and take in all of Bella Roma in all its splendor.

January 2011

Italy is the first country on earth to introduce biodegradable plastic bags-making it mandatory. Of course, just like the frail bags, no sooner was the law introduced than we started to see the rips in it...by August the law had to be reinstated, and this very December 28th, it looks like the law has mysteriously disappeared off the books.

Tod's businessman Della Valle offers to pay for restoring the Colosseum but with all the bickering about the handout, by December, it seems no work has truly started.

Tante Belle Cose a Tutti per un Magnifico 2012!!

Italy's Holiday Traditions

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 18:07:00 +0000

Natale con i tuoi...Pasqua con chi vuoi (Christmas with the 'rents - parents - Easter with whomever you choose) is always a nice way to look at the holidays in Italy. Many families stay home, delaying beach or snow vacations until after the 25th of December so they can break bread with others in their oft-extended families. The die-hards who really want a getaway, sometimes take mamma with them, in a case of killing two birds with one stone (and the benefit of free babysitting!) So you often see multi-generations enjoying the pool during your holiday vacation.
Comparing notes this Christmas with a (German) friend, we got around to the topic of card games and Tombola! (Italy's version of Bingo!) which, after imbibing in the big meal is a hallmark of the festivities. I remarked that the kids had won 20 euro off of me that day while playing Mercante in Fiera, a sort of bidding on cards that might turn up lucky once you've accumulated enough in your hand.
And it dawned on us both...how ironic that the celebration of the birth of Jesus was observed by heavy duty gambling, bartering and card dealing? I'm not sure where the tradition started...perhaps long before Alexander the Great decreed Christianity as the official religion...but, wasn't it Jesus who eventually threw the money changers out of the Temple? After losing more and more as the day grew on, I too, found my inner Jesus and wanted to go after the ones changing my money into theirs!
According to donna.tuttogratis.it, it was actually the Bourbon King of Naples who instigated Tombola...Reasoning that, by making it legal, they would do away with the dark underbelly of illegal gambling. And so it was that Tombola Neapolitana entered into the homes of all Italians and those immigrants to foreign lands. Leave it to the crafty neapolitans who love their traditions and you've got Tombola!

Holidays are for Giving

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 11:00:00 +0000

I would like to say, first & foremost, in the spirit of Christmas or all that you celebrate, Grazie mille! to all my faithful fans, long time readers, and occasional drive-bys wherever you may be. And while I'm thrilled that there are people out there who take time out of their day and select my blog of the 10 trillion 489 thousand blogs to choose from (and that's excluding the Chinese!), this season, I thought I'd ask for something in return.
I came across this terrific post at Blogher.com by author & blogger, Melissa Ford. She suggests a few things to give your favorite blogger - which won't cost money, will seriously cheer someone up (namely, me!) and make the world of difference in someone's life [insert image of 70s star Sally Struthers and her charity here].

from VinMag.com - gift items for sale

Give the Gift of Comments. And I quote:

I know you're probably thinking this gift sounds akin to receiving socks under the Christmas tree, but hear me out. What do writers want most of all? They want eyes on their work and a response to their work. Bloggers crave traffic because traffic equals human beings all enjoying the words they've strung together. And they like comments because no one wants to speak into a vacuum. We want to know that our words were heard and to know how the reader received them.

So, if any of you want a New Year's Resolution you can stick to...how about commenting on posts every now and again? Letting us know someone is 'out there'. In the words of Christopher Robbin to Winnie-the-Pooh..."Are you there, Pooh? Good. I just wanted to be sure of you."

To read the full blog post and see Melissa's 'gift certificate' list, click here.

Grazie del pensiero!

Buone Feste -

Merry Crisis!

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 15:59:00 +0000

If this is the gift the govt wanted to give,
shall we say...You really shouldn't have!

Although we have heard rumors that pensions will go up a bit (while the age of retirees will be raised considerably), just like in the USA, it won't be the rich nor the politicians who will foot the bill for Italy's present financial woes. The rich get to keep their money abroad, the criminals get to pocket the cash (upwards of 100 billion euro industry), and the politicos get to keep their high salaries and their black income while - according to the above Pensioners Union, it will be those left working and those low income families who will be hurting the most.
Last week alone saw Ms. Mussolini (the granddaughter of the late great Berlusconi predecessor) saying that a pay cut for the highest paid Parliament on earth would be "akin to instigating suicide". They're all paid more than Barack Obama and I don't see him in bread lines. She blithely ignores those that actually have killed themselves due to this financial crisis. Nonetheless, if govt cuts = suicide, that could mean two things:

1) Italy now embraces assisted suicide
and
2) Will most of the Parliamentarians do it?
That would ease the burden on us all, pensioners or not.

Oopla! and other Exclamations...

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 19:24:00 +0000

One of the delights of living in a foreign country is finding all the words that are similar, and even getting tripped up by the 'false friends' that may come your way. But when it comes to little-known exclamations, I always get a great big kick out of them.

In English, when you hurt yourself, you say Ouch! or Ow! Everyone knows, starting with your first boo-boos that that's what one must emit in order to convey pain. In Italian, the word is Aiiah! And to this day I still think the person means Wow! whenever I hear it uttered. But that can't be, their word for that is Waio! It all makes me want to thumb through some old Batman comics just to get a glimpse of the Pow! Bash! Bang! and their Italian equivalents.

When you hear a crowd sing out, Hip, hip hoorah--The über-phonetic Italians will actually shout Hoo-rah and not the American hooray...something that always brings to mind Pacino in Scent of a Woman. Furthermore, in my opinion, this is actually much more correct as I recall when first learning to read and wondering just why it was we said 'hooray'!

Disney's Oopla says Oops!
from Disney Character Central

But my personal favorite is Oopla! And although urbandictionary.com lists it as Oh, Dear! (just about how more un-hip can you get?!) I think the true translation is Oops! just as it should be...
But looking into all this hoopla I came across Oopla who I gather is a Star Wars figure. And then there was the guy from oopla.net - someone professing to make sense out of stocks & portfolio issues. Perhaps his name is intentional...given the huge mistake of allowing our banks to throttle the universe with their derivatives and spreads and subprime mortgages... (and to think...all this time and the world was afraid of Kim jong-il...)

Nonetheless, I still would advise an updated brand name for Mr. Braeckman and his enterprise.

Italy: Closed for Business

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 14:09:00 +0000

In this Age of Austerity, Italians have been taking to the streets to protest the various measures which are leaving the middle class to foot the bill for the excesses of their political class (comprising some of the wealthiest in Italy & the most coddled politicians on earth). While I'm all for protests, like sit-ins on the capital, or the SNOQ Se non ora quando marches by women across the boot,I for one cannot tolerate the endemic strikes that wreak their havoc on daily life in Italy [and moreover, the summer strikes that bring the French truckers & farmers to occupy that entire country's highway systems for weeks on end.]

Today I don't strike

In the first place, I think it's a big brand image mistake. I cannot for the life of me comprehend just how pissing off millions who would otherwise rally your cause helps you make your case. In the last few weeks we've seen all the buses, trams & subways shut down, thankfully operating during rush hours as they are forced by law. Nonetheless, it still took me 6 1/2 hrs. to go to two different appointments located on polar opposite sides of Rome. The last thing I wanted to do by the time I walked in my front door was feel warm fuzzies for the strikers. In fact, my solution would be Ronald Reagan's: Fire them all and hire a whole host of hard-working Bangladeshis, Poles, Libyans & Romanians who just want a job.
If you want us on your side, take your woes to the Ministry of Transport - occupy their house - throw rotten eggs - broadcast propaganda against cuts on your buses for all I care, but leave the rest of us well enough alone.
One of the most incredible things I heard over the radio was the fact that, like many other sports before it, Italy's horse racing venues are all drastically in the red. Counting on payoffs - errr...support by the local or national governments to keep them alive, these places have also been hit by the budget cuts. In the 1900s, horse racing was the biggest sport in the USA. People bet on their horses by the thousands, jockeys were revered like our basketball & football players today. But, market forces changed all that and out it went to be something that only Arab horse breeders now contend for.
Our knighted Chairman of the Ippica Foundation offered his own solution for the decline in interest in his sport - while lamenting the fact that people no longer flock to the tracks, he offered, We're planning to go on strike.
At least no one will be bothered by this audacious act of dissent.

Italy: the Grapes of Wrath

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 14:45:00 +0000

The fruit of the spirit by Magnolia Heartbeats

One of my good friends and loyal blog fan, Carolinrome held a warm holiday evening so I could present my book to a group of women readers & expats...We all enjoyed a few good laughs doing what women do best: Tell incredible stories.

Using the book chapters as a launch pad, it wasn't long before everyone was telling one of their own...These ran the gamut from post office woes (where one woman actually called the toll free number pondering exactly, why, people didn't 'go postal' in Italy given the services were so much worse) to toilet flushers (from my brief run-down in the book called Royal Flush).

We also discussed some of the other unique features to Italian living, such as never ever touching one's food with one's hands. In my book (Peel me a grape, Beulah - click here for entry), I imagined this was for pesticides but then again, I decided it was just germs combined with the impeccable table-training at the apron skirts of mammas everywhere, in order to exhibit one's exceptional Bella Figura.
Turns out, I may be wrong. A woman stated that her own (Italian) husband, will not let her peel his mandarin oranges or clementines for him...She discovered that it upset his bodily harmony...Again, I immediately assumed this was due to the perceived onslaught of germs perhaps from her handling her fork prior that might be lurking around just waiting to get under that orange peel and onto a juicy slice. I was wrong.
In what might lead to a certain revision in the book, she was told in no uncertain terms that the way she peeled the tiny oranges released acidic juices so as to upset his stomach.
As I stated in the book, In Italy, stomach upsets out-trump all other existential conditions. Therefore she was left with no other choice than to simply serve the oranges as nature intended them and let him sort out his own gastric juices accordingly.
-----------------------
As a postscript, I found these warning labels for grape eating on the website The Perfect Shape.com:

Although it seems that grapes can have a huge positive effect on the human body, there are some RESTRICTIONS/ WARNINGS regarding their consumption. Here are some of them:

1. Neither grapes, nor grapes juice are recommended for persons suffering from stomach ulcers, diabetes and obesity;
2. Eating grapes or drinking grapes juice can cause dental problems. If you have a cavity in a tooth, it is not recommended to consume grapes, as they will intensify the destruction process of the tooth;
3. Grapes cannot be consumed along with a relatively large number of food products, like: milk, fish, beer, mineral water, melons, etc. The combination of these kinds of food products with grapes can cause serious stomach problems.

Perhaps we should all wisen up and take our cue from the Granmammas whose health precautions are probably the soundest advice one could ever have gotten prior to the internet (and even afterwards)!

Italian Post Office Blues

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 16:26:00 +0000

I have been sending out copies of my book recently to places far and wide. And incredibly, books were delivered to the person intended in under four days - and these were to places as disparate as outside Milan, the Siena hillside, London, and Calabria. So much so, I thought maybe I'd have to eventually eliminate the chapter in my book, The Postman Never Rings (even) Once.
In fact, with all the talk these days of the U.S. Postal service eliminating saturday delivery, it looks like I might have to republish the chapter in a book on the USA.
While discussing the post office and all the terrific things one can do inside this update of the Ancient Forum main square, one newcomer to Italy remarked to a colleague that he'd never set foot inside an American post office in his life but after moving to Italy, he'd already been there five times in under 2 months!
Another Italian friend was totally bummed out because he had to step inside the post office to make some transactions. He was worried about the wait. I had never thought of it, but that's because it was the first of the month. The elderly would be mobbing the joint to collect their pension checks. So that's why I sometimes found that I was the youngest one at the post office! Certainly - the young immigrants now use call centers or Western Union outposts to wire their money home...
And while it looks like these days money might buy efficiency (it's now €5.50 just to send my light book outside Italy), I'll stick by my comment under the book entry entitled, Going Postal:

For any expatriate or any Italian who has lived abroad Post Office horror stories are legend: true legends.

Feel free to post yours!

Rome's Mayor is really the Grinch?

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 13:38:00 +0000

I was going to post today about the truly bizarre Christmas tree I happened to pass last night in Rome's main Piazza Venezia. At first, I thought it was a promotion of a water company, launching their eco paper drinking cups in place of the plastic. As someone twittered about the "tree", it looked like a gigantic cone decorated with the Mayor's sash. Fortunately for Italy, the red-white-green color of our flag happens to match that of Christmas. Which could be actually deliberate when you come to think that it was good ol' Saint Nick whose bones were stolen out of Turkey back in the day & laid to rest in Bari who started the whole affair in the first place...

In fact, when I took a good look at it, it appeared that the tree was made out of white turkish carpets and topped with a minaret. Perhaps as a nod to all of the new Italian residents who have shown up on our beaches from Libia and in the recent census?
Needless to say, by the time I went back to Piazza Venezia to take a photo of the monstrosity, it was gone. Out of sight.

Mayor Alemanno gets into the Christmas spirit

Turns out our Mayor of Do-Overs (search Ara Pacis & you'll see the lively debate which touches on elevators, parking lots, & even a statue of the pope or click for one excerpt here) simply "Didn't like the look." Errrrr...if he can wield veto powers over city decór, perhaps someone could have let him have a peek at the design to begin with?
Of course, in these days of austerity, people are asking the question, How much did this new fiasco just cost the people of Rome? Actually, since it's in eye-shot of tourists in the popular Piazza Venezia, I'd say, How much did this just cost the tourists from the ever-burgeoning 'tourist tax' budget? Consider it our little Christmas present. You'd think with all our generosity they'd let us at least step up onto the grass if not to sing a song hand in hand like in the Grinch, to photograph the lovely nativity scene when the do-over is set into place.
But my question is, Did the guy who pocketed the bribe for the "Holiday Decoration Contract" have to return his portion of the fee? Or, does he get double the money now that they're doing a makeover?
Regardless, I think the Mayor should have done nothing. With a papier mache tree, it would only have lasted up til the first rain storm anyway.
To see the mirage tree, click here.

Italian Lessons from Life in Italy

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 13:31:00 +0000

Life in Italy.com is an excellent online publication of all good things Italian. For some time, and through the words of able writer Elisa Bressan, they offer mean, lean mini-courses in Italian also available by mp3 download, for any of you who want to brush up on your Italian conversations.
Her most recent posting is, "How to say you're sorry in Italian" (click on title for link) Bellissima. It's always nice to know how to show a sign of grace when up against the odds. To her - exhaustive - and highly accurate list of expressions, I would also add one more:
Permesso? or, Con Permesso?
Although this is more like an Excuse Me versus an I'm Sorry.
Nonetheless, it comes in very handy. One should use it when entering a room, any room, even if it's someone you know very well (like a boyfriend's house and especially his parents' place). It's asking permission to enter, or like an 'Excuse Me' when spoken on a bus, in a crowded area, or even before barging into a meeting.

picture from Cliff Robbins speaks business blog

My only doubt in all of this formality, however comes from a line in my book, Sorry is for Sissies:
Say you're sorry and you'll be going down as fast as the Titanic.
In fact in Italy, you will be hard-pressed to ever hear the words spoken by anyone - in any given situation. It's as if, as related by TV personality & business blog commentator Cliff Robbins, people followed John Wayne's advice that apologizing is a sign of weakness. In fact, just the opposite is true but this is a cultural difference worth noting for future reference.
In any case, as I conclude in my book:
The old adage that “Love means never having to say you’re sorry” must have been born in Italy, the country of Amore.

*all links in grey are live

Cliff Robbins has been doing a television show called Fox Robbins since 2009.
To view past episodes visit: Fox Robbins and visit Fox Robbins Business Blog on Cape Cod Today.

Lost Luggage? What (not) to do in Italy!

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 18:40:00 +0000

No sooner had I posted that TrenItalia was finally going to search for your left luggage or lost objects, than I lost my cellphone aboard an Italian train. I decided to test drive their new service and see how I fared:

- The announcement was made on 18 Nov stating that people like me ("the distracted traveler") can now report their lost objects to the Ufficio Assistenza Clienti at the main rail station where they have disembarked.

Unfortunately for me, I did not read the fine print with the operative word, "subito" (immediately). Although I had noticed my cellphone was missing right away, and even re-boarded to look for it, I could not find it. It could be that it had been stolen off the little table in my distraction disembarking the train.

- Checking the Trenitalia website, however, this announcement has not made it to the computer screens of their online web content person, most likely the son of a manager's lover, hired to keep him out of trouble. I began the Italian internot series of surfing the web (which generally feels like the surfer has actually been drowned by a massive wave).

Clicking on:

- Lost Luggage = Contact the City of Rome then trying

- Assistenza Clienti (Customer Assistance) = Contact the City of Rome then on to

- Lost Objects under the Station Services Tab = Contact the City of Rome

and finally, looking under

- FAQs / Oggetti Smarriti (Lost Objects) you will find the Civil Code detailing why, in fact, you must Contact the City of Rome.

Each of these options boldly promised "For more information, click on Trenitalia website", of course with a live link redirecting you to ticket purchases only.

All of which provoked the question, Does the Mayor's office get involved?

- I of course was still operating under the assumption that should my cellphone have slipped and fallen, perhaps the Cleaning Crew might bring it in. After all, my train was the last one in that night, and perhaps by morning it'd be found and handed in the next day to Customer Service. So off it was to that very place.

- I was given the typical customer service song & dance that one commonly receives when faced with any dilemma: "No can do." Followed quickly with, "You should have come in immediately, we don't hold objects, we can't help you..." and soon thereafter by the agent just getting up and walking away from her desk. A forlorn soul behind her took pity on me, flicked some pages in a log book of lost objects (I am assuming, but it was probably their bets on the day's soccer match), and shrugged her shoulders. I asked if they might at least list what I was missing and my contact info...but to no avail. I offered that perhaps the cleaning crew might turn it in, and then how would they reach me? In response, I was given a tiny over-copied slip of paper. On it, the Magic Words: Contact the City of Rome. At least this time it was specified "Lost Objects Office", emails & other contact info.

- I was then told to file the "Police Report" in order to assure that my tel number would be cancelled by my operator. The dept was located nearby, right in front of Track 13.

Going there, I was sent to Track 1 - about 1 mile away.

- Thankfully, the police dept was actually on Track 2, so I only walked about 1/2 a mile. Once inside, I began the wait - but after 40 minutes the same 3 people were still ahead of me. So I up & left with the knowledge that my cellphone was now in use by some lucky chap who boarded the train that very morning. So off I went directly over to a Vodafone store.

- Turns out, I no longer need a police report for them to cancel the SIM card & issue a new one. New card in hand, I started receiving messages from the fellow that had my phone. With a sense of humor, he asked if I might not top it up with funds.

- I had an appointment at the Carabinieri later that day, so I filed a report - saying this guy clearly had my phone. That "denuncia" (complaint) only took about 40 mins. to complete-they didn't ask for my first born, just my father's name. I would like to think that they'll track this guy down thru his cellphone that now appeared on my screen (as the Italians like to quip, La mamma of the idiots is always pregnant...).

In short, the new TrenItalia fab "lost & found" service:

(0) in communications

(Sub-Zero) if you only notice your missing item much later

and in terms of efficiency (-25) Contact the City of Rome's lost & found office

Once there, I can assure you, you will be sent to the police station taking hours to file a complaint, and, only in the unlikely event that your bag or object should ever turn up (assuming the gypsies haven't pulled it out of the rubbish bin first), you would need a return trip to Italy just to check on it and retrieve it. (-100).

Oh - and to Contact the City of Rome?

Try email: oggettismarriti@comune.roma.it

Address: Circonvallazione Ostiense 191

opening hrs:

Mon-Wed-Fri 8:30 - 13.00 / Tues 8:30 - 13.00 & 15.00-17.00 / Thurs 8:30-17.00

Tante Belle Cose: November in Italy

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 14:30:00 +0000

Of course, the absolute *best* news to come our way this month (other than the launch of my book!) was seeing Silvio Berlusconi get his comeuppance when finally he was delivered with the sorry news that It’s the Economy, Stupido. [To his defense, he had relied on the Italian post office for delivery...so it came a bit late]. A bon vivant and symbol of all that is wrong with Italy (skirting the law, sidetracking the women professionals in favor of the professional women strippers, proffering rampant nepotism & cronyism, suggesting people don’t pay taxes all the while treating the judiciary with gross disrespect), he was finally forced to step down. He may be down but this does not signify he is out. Although he did very little for Italy over the last 17 yrs wandering the ~~lap dance~~ halls of power, he has vowed to play on...

In fact, fans of Silvio's will find that his record album, Il vero amore was released this month. If that's not a case of a politician lying right through his teeth, I don't know what is. Tell us about True Love, Silvio!

We are now faced with the prospect of his delfin – Angelino Alfano, the strange alien life form now at the helm of his party who I am sure if he took off his mask is in reality Admiral Ackbar. Italy: the next Death Star.

I may be a bit behind on reporting this news, but after recently purchasing two wonderful tiny Bialetti Moka espresso makers (you know, the old-fashioned ones that you set on the stove only after spilling costly coffee grains all over the kitchen counter and then wait as it spits up the black gold all over the stovetop), I discovered a whole section of spare parts for it hanging in grocery & appliance stores around town. Offering – at long last – the little plastic handles and tops to your espresso maker that you have, over the years, melted down to irrecognizable clumps of their former selves.

Perhaps if they’d offered this years ago, the rest of the world wouldn’t have switched to the handy spill-proof pods & electric coffee makers by now. Regardless, I say stock up now before they can only be found in archeological museums.

Rome continues to beautify itself. This time, completing the restyling of the romantic Parco degli Aranci (the orange garden) on the Aventino hill which offers a stunning – and silent – view of Rome. Also, the park across from the Bocca della Verità was done up and now sports a labyrinth of greenery for you to enjoy. But for some real treats in the area, head up the tiny street nearby - via dei Cerchi - and on the corner before crossing into the Circus Maximus you’ll find Cristalli di Zucchero. It's a slice of heaven serving tasty treats including those mouth-watering macarons in every sort of flavor – my favorite rose - bagel sandwiches and chocolate-covered ambrosia, food of the gods.

Across the street from there & up a few doors is a newish wine bar serving great food 24/7 and excellent happy hour buffets. Next stop: Piazza Vittorio, Rome’s largest piazza (remember, St Peter’s square is in Vatican territory) will be getting its own facelift. And around there, even more treats to be had amongst the foreign foodstuffs &amp, cheap Chinese shops, and Rome's oldest gelateria.

Now if the city only spent more time & money on cleaning up its outskirts or enabling recycling, we’d truly be a shining jewel in the crown of city planning.

Elsewhere around town, the Province of Rome has installed hundreds of solar panels in schools everywhere. And Yelp.it That website for allowing the lowly customers a voice was launched in Italy (I personally can’t wait to start uploading reviews).

And finally, Trenitalia finally got closer to their customers by starting a lost luggage contact point with their Ufficio Assistenza Clienti located at each rail station (Really?! Italy's Trenitalia has a customer service center??! Hopefully it'll be an improvement on the one I went to at Rome's airport - with the doors locked and no one in the office once I infiltrated the premises or the one in Torino where the doors do not open automatically). Of course, this news doesn't bode well when their illustrious website still informs you that you must file a complaint with the local police dept instead.

Luggage-less English speakers can also try their luck at calling the Phone Center (they speak English) but...that costs you money and...I wish you luck.

Regardless, this is still great news arriving only 172 years after people started losing their bags on trains since taking to the rails under the Naples' Reign of the Two Sicilies.

But hey, as the Trenitalia motto reads: Always better late than never.

A Guide to Life in Italy - Now Available!

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:07:00 +0000

Now you can have your very own User's Manual to Italy!

Just in time for the holidays...

Francesca Maggi takes off her rose-colored glasses and takes on Italy's world-renowned Quality of Life. Starting with her X Commandments of Life in Italy [Thou shalt not covet thy customer, Thou shall hold La Mamma as your one true omnipresent and omniscient lord of the household], she tackles Italian bureaucracy, drivers, superstitions, traditions, La Mamma and more. Readers will get a hilarious insider's guide from an outsider's perspective, taking us through the trials and tribulations of life in Bell'Italia.

About the author...Francesca Maggi first came to Italy at the tender age of 4 months. A return visit at age 6 sealed her fate as she endured the agony and enjoyed the ecstasy of this country of contradictions. She has been working with Italy for nearly 30 years, 20 of them as a resident while traveling the entire swathe of the Boot and taking in the sights, sounds & society's peccadillos from Trapani to Trieste.

Illustrations by...Throughout the book, you'll find each chapter introduced by the inimitable vignettes of Gianni Falcone, or GianFalco...www.gianfalco.it which are part & parcel of the humor of the book...(including the cover image). You can see more by Gianni by clicking the main tab on the blog page, Cartoon of the Week...or visiting his blogs on OpenSalon (Just a few Pixels) or Diario Acido.

What they're saying...Francesca Maggi is brilliant -- a modern day critic following in the footsteps of Luigi Barzini's The Italians. Her stories are at once funny, irreverent and poignant.

OMG - i just read the first few paragraphs of the ''Baby on Board' part of your book! that was hilarious.....im still laughing ROFL!
Been reading your book and LOVE it!! Great insight and funny, FAMILIAR anecdotes!

Get a signed copy if you purchase the book off the Official Home Page
Burnt by the Tuscan Sun

http://burntbythetuscansun.blogspot.com

Fine Feathered Friends-Thanksgiving in Italy

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Thu, 24 Nov 2011 07:30:00 +0000

For Thanksgiving, I bring my annual tradition of posting one of my earliest entries on celebrating this very American tradition as an expat...Today, or often over the weekend, people are breaking bread (well, actually stuffing) with their native friends, and many foreign faces as well. So, wherever you are, enjoy your own Festa di Ringraziamento!

Spending time in the USA during my favorite holiday, Thanksgiving, well, makes me think about all those wonderful Thanksgiving Days celebrated by all us 'expats' in our adopted countries. In much the same way that Italy (and Europe, for that matter) have adopted Halloween as their own, well, in industrious Milan or places like Geneva or Lausanne, even the store owners get ready when Thanksgiving comes around the corner. It's so popular, you now need to order the bird in advance. Those same stores stock their shelves with many items that ordinary Italians would probably have fed to their pigs if they had them.

Although Italians eat lots of turkey, they seriously don't eat - much less prepare - the 15kg. version -- whole. But, right around the last week of November, you could ask the butchers to purchase and then hold onto the whole bird. And this was terrific. Aside from providing the butchers and cashiers a bit of holiday entertainment, you (along with your bird) would be the center of attention. One year, they were so confused by our request, a friend ended up with an 11kg bird for the price of one kilo: 3euro95. Even after questioning the amount, they insisted the price was right...let's just say given the cost of things here, we had lots to be thankful for that year!

Surprisingly, Thanksgiving in Italy brings one lots closer to the original Thanksgiving feast. First, there's the shipping of all the canned foodstuffs, probably not unlike the stuff our forefathers brought in huge wooden crates to and from the New World. Americans start filling up empty suitcases with goodies like cans of pumpkin and cranberry, Stovetop stuffing mix, and packs of Jiffy cornbread (because polenta just doesn't do the trick).

But, in a nod to those original pilgrims, I must say, it's the turkey. While we don't have to quite break its neck & clean out its gizzards (although, if you forget to request it, you might just end up with the whole thing, head and all), we all get a bit tripped up by something never quite seen in an American home -- all those feathers. Or, feather tips, rather.

While in America, you get something that very remotely resembles the animal from whence it came; here, you're reminded that this was, in actual fact, a bird -- feathers and all. And so, you learn how, exactly, one rids oneself (or one's turkey) of his down without actually peeling the whole skin off, feather tips and all. I can just imagine those early pilgrims trying to figure this one out: the Indians furious that their guests tried cutting away the feathers along with the tasty (and fatty) skin. No wonder so many died of hunger. So, ignoring old traditions of plucking, you find your best gas-powered flame thrower, and start burning away.

Although no matter how long you painstakingly go about de-feathering, there are always a few tough ones left over-- kind of like those grey hairs you try so hard to dye. And, while I must say, this process does not make me nostalgic for the huge butterball turkeys with a self-popping thermometer inside, it does add a bit to your preparation time.

The last problem you must face in serving your feast, is that, contrary to popular belief, Italians do not feast, least of which during a non-Catholic holiday, and especially, in the evening. So, that annual pigging out fete sort of falls a bit flat, with each Italian carefully choosing their primo (mashed potatoes & stuffing), the secondo (turkey), and the contorno (veggies), and questioning why one must eat 'family style' and not one dish at a time. They barely fill their plate, never mind second helpings. Stuffing is seen as an alien life form and desserts, well, whoever heard of a dessert made from a vegetable?

So, while the rest of us heap up our plates again and again, and then start loosening our belt buckles, well, judging by our girths, we see why Thanksgiving is an entirely American phenomenon.

Letter from Paris

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Tue, 22 Nov 2011 17:42:00 +0000

Paris - the City of Lights - quite necessary due to the grey haze and often rainy days that is a part of its cityscape. Although if you wake up early and hit the streets you can sometimes find cloud formations and skies that would wake the senses of any a fine artist.
Having lunch in a café, I was startled out of my amazing Japanese meal when the elderly and elegant woman next to me started yelling -- calling for the owner to come to the front immediately. I was stunned by her total composure (she just kept right on supping) in the throws of what seemed like a total Bella Figura breakdown. The New Yorker in me figured she was just another loose screw in the machine that makes up our civil society.
Finally turning my attentions away from her and in front of me, I realized the reason for her alarm: four gypsy kids had meandered into the crowded locale so they could meander out with a five-finger special: your bag, wallet, cellphone, or anything from the pockets of your coats hanging on racks or seat backs. With all the raucous, they turned and ran out immediately, and straight into the arms of a local policeman who then popped his head in to see if anyone was missing an item. He stepped back out to shake the kids down and recover their stash.
This was not the only instance of security I found in this bustling city. Your arrival at Orly (and probably a few other airports and train stations as well) is greeted with machine-gun wielding soldiers strolling the arrivals and departures areas. Coupled with those lime green plastic garbage bags waving in the wind like a humungous Christo exhibit installed throughout every single arondissements which have taken the place of metal garbage cans, well, you can see that these Parisians take their security seriously.
I realized that not only were these the first gypsies I've ever seen around town, it was certainly the first time I've seen them so bold as to enter a restaurant. In Italy, this doesn't seem to happen although instead we have a nightly infestation of wandering vendors selling Chinese gadgets and unscented roses who make their way in amongst the diners. But at least these guys are fairly harmless and don't seem to steal (and, I must admit, I harbor a secret desire to buy some of that junk every so often...).
Nonetheless, I found that the vigilance of both the customers and the proprietors when it comes to protecting our private property and our dining experience quite impressive. I imagine that in our always compassionate Italy, there is the idea that "they're just trying to make a living" which allows our vendors in the door. And the idea that "gypsies are people too" which allows them to roam the streets and pick-pocketing tourists to their heart's delight under the blind eye of our law enforcement officials.

Tons of travel tips for Italy

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 19:58:00 +0000

Friends who run a wonderful B&B - The Beehive - and apartment rental service Cross-Pollinate in Rome have been penning quite a few pointers on their blog for years. It is filled with excellent tips for anyone coming to Rome, with a touch of user-friendly advice as given by their lovely daughters often featured in the videos. I loved the quirky stuff so much, I thought I would bring you one as a guest post feature.
This one is on how, exactly, to drink from the Nasoni (or Big Snout) Water Fountains of Rome just like a native. They also provide another on shopping tips, or purchasing train tickets from Rome Termini Station (right near the Beehive) to Fiumicino - Leonardo Da Vinci airport. You can even download on their home page an exceptional 'insider's guide' to all things Roman while there. Their cross-pollinate blog posts are also filled with cool tips and neat stuff to make any trip that much more pleasurable. So be sure to buzz over there sometime and check out what hoteliers Steve & Linda (& their girls) have to say.

I Nasoni - water fountains of Rome from Cross-Pollinate Travel on Vimeo

note: all live links are in grey above

A New Dawn Greets Italy

noreply@blogger.com (Francesca Maggi) — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 20:16:00 +0000

All the Prime Minister's Women / This picture was posted on the Informare Controinformando News Facebook Page and compares the women Ministers of the previous Administration to those of the newly minted Monti Administration.

Above, we have (the titles above are incorrect)

Minister of Justice - Paola Severino - Lawyer, Four time Vice President of the Council of Military Magistrates, with a stellar defense career, she has been listed as one of the richest public officials.

Minister of the Interior - Anna Maria Cancellieri - Commissioner of Parma, Bologna, et.al., Prefect & Sub-Commissioner of Milano.

Welfare Minister - Elsa Fornero - Economist, specialized in pensions, & Prof of Policy & Economics, Vice Pres on the oversight board of one of Italy's top banks, Intesa Sanpaolo & advisor for Russia & E. European banks

Below, our previous ministers:

Minister of Tourism (Italy's most important industry) - Michela Vittoria Brambilla - Former model, Voted Miss Elegance for Emilia, worked for Mediaset (Berlusconi's TV co.) - Studied some philosophy & obtained journalist credentials

Minister of Education - Mariastella Gelmini - Graduate in Law/Administration outside track, President of the City Board of Desenzano del Garda (a small tourist hamlet)

Minister for Equal Opportunity - Mara Carfagna - Former topless model, ballerina & voted Miss Cinema at the Miss Italy contest - Graduated with honors in jurisprudence before working on Berlusconi's campaign in Campania.

Let's just hope that these women with the credentials can now be the ones to turn heads.