Are you the next Mr. and Mrs. Gatlinburg?

I love a good contest! Don’t you? I mean, who doesn’t want to win stuff?

Gatlinburg has a fun one going on right now. Enter on Gatlinburg’s Facebook page between now and March 17 to become Mr. & Mrs. Gatlinburg. Ha! How hilarious is that?

Gatlinburg employees are looking for romantic stories about the Smoky Mountains and the city of Gatlinburg. So what do you win? From the site: “The grand prize is a trip back to Gatlinburg to share new experiences and relive old memories with your special someone. The first, second and third runners up will also win romantic packages.”

The top five finalists will be posted on Gatlinburg’s Facebook page, and America will have the chance to vote on the final winner.

You can enter the contest here. So how about it — are you the next Mr. & Mrs. Gatlinburg?

By the way, Jason and I probably aren’t. We love Gatlinburg. But we usually have at least one kid on the floor in the room when we visit. So it feels more family-friendly than romantic. Though there is something intrinsically romantic about sharing an Ogle Dog…

Yahoo Sports has released the 2012 fishing license fees for Tennessee.

This year, it will cost $11.50 for a one-day Gatlinburg Trout Permit. That’s required for anyone older than 13 years of age. Other restrictions and licenses are available, too.

Remember, it’s illegal to take fish out of any Tennessee waters without a fishing license. In fact, you even need a license to help someone else take a fish out of the water! So get your license!

A beautiful rosy sunrise over the Smoky Mountains.

Celebrate new life by attending the Easter Sunrise Service at Ober Gatlinburg. We haven’t been in the Smokies for Easter yet, but this sure sounds like a neat opportunity.

On Easter Sunday, April 8, plan to attend the sunrise service at Ober Gatlinburg. The service is led by the Gatlinburg ministerial association. This will be the 13th year for the mountaintop service.

Ober Gatlinburg provides attenders will free tram rides to the top of the mountain. Rides start at 5:15 a.m. and continue at 15 minute intervals until the service begins (around 6 a.m.). There is also complimentary parking for those who choose to drive up.

A breakfast buffet is available at the Ober Gatlinburg Restaurant starting at 6:30 a.m. Last year’s buffet included an omelet station, french toast, pancakes, scrambled eggs, potatoes, bacon, sausage, sausage gravy, biscuits, fruit, muffins, and cinnamon rolls. Cost was $9.95 for adults and $5.95 for kids (10 and under).

Here's my little ninja a few years ago on Halloween. Wish I could get those cheeks back!

So weekends around our house are always interesting.

Basically, my husband is a can’t-relax-don’t-want-to-be-in-the-house extreme extrovert. Whenever possible, we book every spare moment with friends, family, activities, etc. This weekend was really busy, but that’s how we like life, so we were happy.

But it meant that we stayed up really late. Well, late for 30-somethings, anyway. Not late for our previous, pre-kid lives. But I was up until 12:30 a.m. (!) and Jason didn’t crawl in bed until almost 2!

Naturally, that means that we’re going to need a Sunday afternoon nap. No way can we just roll with that like we would have in years past. We told the kids they could play as long as they could do it quietly — Mommy and Daddy needed a nap! It worked like a charm.

After a really great nap, I stretched and asked the kids what they’d been up to. Before I explain that to you, I need to make sure that you understand what a 9-year-old girl can be like, in case you don’t have one of your own around. My 9-year-old JABBERS!!!! She goes on and on and on and on. Today was one of those days. I was still drowsy from my nap and the kid just KEPT TALKING! I thought, “Maybe if I respond in a monotone, ‘Um-hum’ she’ll get the idea.” Nope. Kept talking.

And most of what she was telling me was crazy detail about things I really don’t need to know about — such as the minute details about the musical she’s putting on at school (I’ll see the live performance — probably twice) and the page-by-page ending to the book she’s reading (I read it months ago to make sure it wasn’t too grown up) and then more about the musical. And some stuff about her friend (so shoot me — I don’t really care about her friend’s after school activities).

So it’s only natural that I almost missed this very funny nugget. Sometimes, I think kids should come equipped with lights on their heads and that start blinking when they are about to say something really important or really funny. Especially 9-year-old girls.

Anyway. I almost missed this. Because I really was toning some of this stuff out. So, here we are, just to make you smile on a Monday…

What the Beutler kids were up to yesterday afternoon while their lazy mom and dad slept:

(I know that those of you with babies are jealous right now, because we have time to take naps. Don’t worry. These days will come for you, too. Someday. Seriously.)

So, the kids owe me money from a series of strange things over the past month or so. They’ve been doing chores in the afternoons to slowly pay down that debt. Well, they decided that paying off the debt that way would take too long.

So they decided to open a lemonade stand. In winter.

They decided their stand needed a mascot. Jaybin thought a blue ninja would be a good mascot for a winter lemonade stand.

So they dressed him all in blue and made him as ninja-like as they could. They tied a headband around his head. They figured out how to make a belt/sheath for his ninja sword.

But then they were worried because it’s quite cold outside. They were pretty sure I would make Jaybin wear his coat, and then people wouldn’t be able to tell that he’s the ninja mascot. So they layered ten (10!) blue-ish shirts on top of one another to keep him warm in the Indiana winter.

That was about as far as they got during our naps. Yes, the idea brainstorming and mascot-making took almost two hours. So they were wondering if I could now help them open their ninja lemonade stand. Of course, I told them that I was sorry, but I couldn’t. It was almost time to go to church. Naturally, I’m a wonderful mother who would have let them otherwise, despite the fact that it’s 35 degrees outside and we live in a small neighborhood on a cul-de-sac and no one drinks lemonade in the WINTER for crying out loud. Oh no, I definitely wasn’t using church as an excuse!

Here’s hoping they sleep really hard tonight and forget. And here’s hoping they invent that blinking light thing soon. I almost missed that one.

The 12th Annual Saddle Up! Festival in Pigeon Forge starts at the end of February. Yee-haw!

Pigeon Forge will host the 12th Annual Saddle Up! festival at the end of February. But this year, the festival has attracted additional attention. The “Cowgirl Caravan” will be joining the festivities for 2012.

The Saddle Up! festival is scheduled for Feb. 23-26, and it’s intended to be a celebration of the American West. It includes lots of concerts, cowboy activities, and a Chuckwagon Cook-Off.

Stages West is a western wear store in Pigeon Forge and one of the top supporters of Saddle Up! This year, the Stages West people decided to invite the “Cowgirl Caravan” to join in the fun.

The “Cowgirl Caravan” is part of the group called Sisters on the Fly. The group, which has more than 2,000 members, takes travel trailer caravans around the country on vacations and outdoor adventures. They do things like fishing, running rivers, riding horses, and camping. And at the end of February, they are coming to Pigeon Forge!

The travel trailers, which are 12- to 24-feet in length, are decorated in “a Western kitschy style.” They will be open for inspection on Feb. 25 during the Chuckwagon Cook-Off. One of the trailers is a 1963 Metzendorf, a rare vehicle handmade from the same metal used to make food cans.

Food for the weekend will be provided by six authentic and historic cowboy chuckwagons and their cook teams.

The schedule for the long weekend includes things like cornbread sampling at Old Mill Square, lots of concerts and stories, a cowboy dance, and cowboy church. About 15 bands will be participating in the weekend.

Tickets for the weekend are available on the Pigeon Forge website, and are sold for individual events, which vary in price from $5 (chuckwagon breakfast) to almost $55 (dinner at Partridge and the Pear and concert).

Saddle Up!

Well, I found a very interesting article by the Smoky Mountain News. It’s worth a read, because it involves “tricking” tourists for monetary gain.

Here’s the gist: Leaders in Haywood and Jackson counties in North Carolina have asked the N.C. Department of Transportation for signs pointing tourists to Cherokee through their perspective towns.

The part that really affects tourists? One sign that has been requested points tourists on a route that takes 45 minutes, rather than 20 minutes the other way.

Read the whole article here. It’s interesting.

According to the Enhanced Online News, Titanic Pigeon Forge will be hosting “A Night to Remember: An Original Musical Tribute to Titanic” on Saturday, April 14, which is the 100th anniversary of the night the famed ship struck the iceberg on its maiden voyage.

The night will include musical performances, historic ceremonies, and appearances by actual descendants of the Titanic’s passengers and crew.

The tribute will take place at 8:30 p.m. at the Titanic Pigeon Forge museum. Tickets will be available beginning Monday, Feb. 20 by calling 800-381-7670.

Oh yes, there it sits. In its pretty red box. Tempting you. Get it out of the house! Quick!

Valentine’s Day sure isn’t like it used to be.

Back in the 80s, we would hand out Valentines, sure. We’d make them or buy the cute little character cards. They still do this now. But unlike the 80s, now every card comes with CANDY!

Pixie Sticks, lollipops, Nerds, more lollipops, Snickers bars, did I mention lollipops? My son actually came home with a heart-shaped box of candy that a classmate had given to EACH STUDENT! Candy, candy, everywhere! Between the stuff the kids bring home and the giant Reese’s hearts I gave them (’cause they ARE my Valentines…) and the candy I bought to decorate the Valentine’s Day table and the just-sittin’-around-cause-it’s-V-Day candy …. hmm … wait a minute, it’s starting to sound like this is more my fault than anything else.

Anyway, no matter whose fault it is, Valentine’s Day is starting to rival Halloween as a candy emergency! I’ve gotta get the stuff out of my house. So, here it is:

10 uses for Valentine’s Day Candy

1. M&Ms duels.

I found this little gem at the Science 2.0 website. Love it.

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the “loser,” and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3×5 card reading, “Please use this M&M for breeding purposes.”

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this “grant money.” I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

2. Use it or lose it.

The Journal Star has this great idea — Skip the poker chips: Bet with candy at your next card game.

3. Turn that candy into a grown-up treat.

Mix That Drink has a fun-sounding recipe for those little bags of Skittles that always come as Valentines these days. That’s right, follow the above link to make your own Skittles Vodka. Hmmm…

4. Make a Blizzard!

A CNN article has this great suggestion — who needs Dairy Queen when you can make up your own Blizzards using leftover Valentine’s Day candy?

Don’t have the time to hit up Dairy Queen? Try crumbling your Snickers, 3 Musketeers, or Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups and sprinkling them over ice cream or place in a blender to create a homemade blizzard or flurry. For added effect, add caramel or chocolate sauce and a dash of milk to create a smoother texture.

This is a tasty and fun option that the entire family can put their stamp on with their favorite candies.

5. Incentives!

Either I’m a really mean mom or my kids forget things really fast, but I like to confiscate their candy and save it for incentives. They don’t seem to remember that it was THEIR candy in the first place. And it’s amazing what they’ll do for a Pixie Stix!

6. Budding (candy) artists

Well, now I’m getting creative. Watch out.

It’s not the right time of year for gingerbread houses (the most traditional way to get rid of candy…), but why not have your little artists make a candy collage? Dump out M&Ms and Skittles, unwrap Reese’s and Snickers, get a nice heavy piece of paper and some glue and let them go to town. Fun!

7. Trade it in

KidsHealth.org suggests holding a Candy Exchange. Get a scale, and have your kids weigh their stash. Allow them to trade in candy for a book or toy. For example, let them earn a book for every pound of candy they trade in.

Then, take the candy to work to share with co-workers! It doesn’t do you much good to take it from the kids, then eat it all yourself!

8. Halloween decor

The Stir has a fun suggestion: “Create a Halloween wreath for next year. Grab a styrofoam wreath and a glue gun, and go candy crazy.”

9. Donate it

Did you know that you can donate candy? According to The Stir, you can donate it several places, including nursing homes, doctors’ offices, shelters, and troops abroad.

10. Wear it

It’s a cultural craze — kids everywhere are wearing candy bar jewelry. Don’t believe me? Just do a quick Etsy search, and you’ll see.

But your kids can make it themselves, too. Ecouterre has some great step-by-step instructions. Try them out!

We celebrated 12 years of marriage this year. And we've spent a lot of it laughing.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Almost. I know, V-Day isn’t until tomorrow. But tomorrow I’ll be busy teaching class, taxiing kids to a hip-hop dance party, and pulling off a special Valentine’s dinner (think heart-shaped Jello Jigglers and Kool-Aid) for my kids. And we don’t post on Tuesday, so for all purposes, Happy Valentine’s Day today!

For those of you that know me well, I’m not a “romantic” person. Neither is Jason. It’s (almost) always worked for us. I say almost because the photo I’m posting here always reminds me of the one time it ticked me off. We were on a piazza in Venice, a band was playing slow music, romance was so thick in the air that you couldn’t help but run right into it, and MY husband was holding strong to the fact that he does not, under any circumstances, dance. That once, I would’ve traded him in for Romantic Jason robot in a heartbeat. But for the vast majority of the time, our more practical relationship works.

We’re not the types who would, ever in a million years, declare our love for each other on Facebook. When we’re with a group, we usually choose to sit apart, so we can talk to different people. To some, it may seem like we aren’t romantic at all.

But instead, I’d say that we aren’t traditionally romantic. Jason may have bought me flowers once in the past 15 years, since we met and fell hard. But honestly, I don’t remember it. What I do remember is the multitude of times he’s surprised me with a new book by my favorite author. That is the most romantic thing in the world to me. I know. I’m a dork.

And he probably remembers nights like last night, when I wasn’t hungry, but I knew he was craving something sweet, so I baked up some chocolate chip cookies and delivered them to him in the basement where he was playing video games, complete with a tall glass of cold milk.

We fit.

As Valentine’s Day has been approaching this year, I’ve been thinking about romance. And even though Jason and I won’t buy each other Valentine’s Day presents or even cards, I know that that’s not an indictment. Some people love those things. But I think we both would rather spend money on a night out together than flowers and candy. We’re practical. We don’t crave those traditional signs of love and romance. We just need the real thing.

After all, true intimacy, I’ve been thinking, is in the millions of small things that happen every day.

Like being able to take a drink of his soda after you said you only wanted water, and he doesn’t even flinch.

Or knowing that he must have sighted a cop car while driving because he lifted his thumb. And you know he does that to check his speed, since he’s too tall to see the speedometer like normal people.

Being able to feel which room he’s in when you walk in the door after a long day at work. Or knowing from the way he says your name if he’s just calling to chat or if he has bad news.

It’s the moment when he picks up the slack when you were too tired, too stressed, too overwhelmed to be a good parent. And you’ve returned the favor on another day.

It’s when you realize that your heart breaks more from watching him suffer loss than from dealing with it yourself.

And knowing there’s no one else you’d rather talk to when you’ve had a really incredible day.

Real intimacy takes time to develop. Years and years. And moments and moments. Those nights (they’re rare anymore, but they happen) when we suddenly realize that it’s time for bed and all we’ve done since we put the kids down was talk about our days. It’s the tears. It’s the multitude of beautiful shared moments watching our kids grow up. It’s watching each other grow up. It’s a lifetime.

And I’m so lucky.

Happy (slurpy) Valentine’s Day, to my one true love. (And I know you’re hating that everyone’s reading this. )

The Mountain Man Memorial March in Gatlinburg.

The Mountain Man Memorial March is an annual event in Gatlinburg and the Smoky Mountains. This year, it will be held on Friday and Saturday, April 20 and 21.

The Mountain Man Memorial March is a 26.2-mile march through the Smoky Mountains and Gatlinburg. It is considered a tribute to our men and women in uniform. The event was created to honor 1st Lt. Frank Walkup, a Univeristy of Tennessee-Knoxville alumnus, who was killed in the line of duty in Iraq in 2007.

The Gatlinburg City website said this about Walkup’s life:

Raised in Woodbury, Tennessee, Frank B. Walkup, IV, always wanted to be like his father and serve in the Army. Upon his graduation from the University of Tennessee in 2005, Frank was commissioned as a second lieutenant in the Infantry. A graduate of Airborne, Air Assault, and Ranger School, Walkup was assigned to the 25th Infantry Division in Hawaii. In the summer of 2006 he was deployed to Iraq as a platoon leader.

     He was killed on 16 June 2007 in Rashaad, Iraq, by an improvised explosive device that detonated near his position during a dismounted patrol. He is survived by his parents, eight brothers and sisters, and his college sweetheart, Sabita Walkup.

Friday night will be the opening ceremony for the event. The actual March will begin at 9 a.m. on Saturday, April 21 in downtown Gatlinburg. The march will then proceed up Hwy. 321. The motto of the event is: “Support the Future, Honor the Past.”

Entry in the march is open in three categories: Military Heavy, Military Light, and Civilian. Those in the military category will have uniform and backpack/ruck sack weight requirements. There are also half- or quarter-marathon options.

Register for the Mountain Man Memorial March here.