What began as a grand scheme from two brilliant lovely bloggers has become an outstanding challenge which has been really embraced by the blogging community.  We wanted to bring the world of vlogging into our wee UK blogging group and hoped that some of you would be willing to give it a go.  Heather @ Notes from Lapland and I decided that we would be happy with 5 entries and ecstatic with 10.  We now have a new benchmark and have to come up with a new vocabulary word to describe how happy we are as we had 20 vlog entries for the first Just Vlog It Challenge- Teach Us Something.  20 bloggers who used their impressive imaginations and tried something new with remarkable success.  We are so proud of everyone who entered.  Heather will be hosting a Just Vlog It Carnival at Notes from Lapland on Monday 15 March to showcase all of the amazing entries.  I suggest that you get your notepad ready…there’s so much to learn from all who entered!

Without further ado, I bring you the winner of the first Just Vlog It Challenge.  Heather and I struggled to choose two vlogs for the public vote but we did manage it in the form of An Instructional Video from A Mother’s Ramblings and Young & Younger Does Big Brother from Young & Younger.  The voting was close.  There was a great turn out at the polls and we now have a winner…

Massive congratulations to Young & Younger for their win in the first Just Vlog It Challenge and big pat on the virtual back for Pippa at A Mother’s Ramblings for her jaw-dropping laundry folding demonstration!  A round of applause for you both!  Mrs. Young Mummy is now the proud recipient of a Slanket who graciously sponsored this Just Vlog It challenge.  We now expect hope to see you, Mr Young Daddy, Mr A and Miss E enveloped in Slankety goodness in a future vlog!  Just a suggestion…

Our next Just Vlog It Challenge theme will be announced the first full week in April.  You have time to rest your video cameras and think up new and exciting ideas to vlog about.  We’ve got some great PRIZES lined up as well…you’ll love it!  And remember to go to Notes from Lapland on Monday 15 March to see all 20 entries in the Just Vlog It Carnival.  Until then, happy vlogging!

The Slanket- Just Vlog It style

For our winner and runner up…the brilliant Heather has prepared for you some gorgeous badges to use on your sidebars of your blogs, if you so choose.  You are by no means obligated BUT we thought you’d like to show off your talents!

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The battle wages on and I have decided that the truth hurts.  As does running.  Actually, I have discovered 3 truths in this bloomin’ Mummy Tummy Begone challenge.

1. I apparently have the smallest ears known to man/womankind.
2. I really need some proper run/walk gear.
3. I don’t know how to run.

It’s hard to accept the truth but I’m coming to terms with it and so should you.  Shall I elaborate so you can share in my lameness misery?  OK then, here we go:

I apparently have the smallest ears known to man/woman kind.  Who knew?  When I went out the door the first night and plugged in the headphones for the iPod and trundled off, I thought everything was fine.  Oops, wait, one headphone just popped out…plug back in.  Oops, now the other one…plug back in.  Dammit…again!  Wait…I can’t reach it…get back in there you *”£$%>!  This went on for the rest of the workout.  Pop…scramble…plug back in… You get the pattern!  I used hubby’s headphones the first night and the PROPER iPod headphones the 2nd and 3rd nights.  The same thing happened with both sets.  The headphones are the ones that fit IN your ears and either I have the smallest inner ear canal or these headphones are just not designed properly.  It’s very irritating when you charge off on the RUN part of a run/walk workout and both ears simultaneously reject the one thing that’s keeping your feet moving!  Not terribly inspiring or motivational.  I would greatly appreciate any suggestions on how I can remedy this situation in an inexpensive way!  Duct tape is really not an option.

I really need some proper run/walk gear!  A Mummy Tummy is a horrible thing.  It makes the waistbands of ALL trousers/jeans/whatever roll down and make you feel like a right lard ass.  This includes any “leggings” that you might think are appropriate for exercising in.  If you looked at me from the hips down, I’m in pretty darn good shape.  I’ve been lucky to not carry weight on my legs and bum.  In fact, I think my trouser size from the HIPS down wouldn’t be half bad.  It’s when you take into account the massive expanse of my belly that I have problems.  When I run I have discovered that the leggings that I’m running in gradually make their way down to my ass and cling there waiting for me to “hoick” them back up.  Again, not terribly helpful when running.  It goes a bit like this at the moment:

• Run, run, run…bra strap up…headphone jammed back in…
• Run, run, run…both hands grab waistband of leggings and jack back up…headphone jammed back in…
• Run, run, run…push hair out of face…bra strap up…headphone…trousers…run, run…headphone…
• You get the picture, eh???

Recommendations now are welcome regarding what I should wear when I venture out again.  I’m getting right proper p***ed off with myself.

I don’t know how to run!  I’ve had nightmares dreams where I’m being chased (as that’s usually the only occasion I would consider running for) and I have forgotten how to run.  That dream is now a reality.  I feel like I am PLODDING down the road and not knowing how to run efficiently.  When I finish each section of running in my workout, my feet can barely take a proper step!  I have so much strain in my tibialis anterior muscle (the muscle that runs along your shin and activates your foot to pick up and step) that it seizes up after running and doesn’t want me to go any further!  I then get tired and plod even more and then try to remember to have a proper heel strike and push through my foot as opposed to having a bit of a marching stride.  But then I’m too tired and my legs hurt too much and so I have to stop!  I don’t know what I’m doing and I apparently don’t know how to run.  I’m willing to work on it but I need someone to tell me what the heck I’m doing wrong.  Who doesn’t know how to run?  I’m considering chucking all the proper form ideas and just running like Phoebe from “Friends” in the episode where she and Rachel go running together.  For the two of you who haven’t seen it, Phoebe runs like a complete nutter- arms flailing, legs akimbo (I love that word)…LIKE A CHILD.  She runs that way because it’s how she ran when she was a kid and running was fun then.  As long as I keep running under cover of darkness maybe it could work for me too!  Please leave your running suggestions in the comments below…I seriously need help!

That’s my Mummy Tummy Begone report for right now.  I managed a 20 minute workout last night but missed Wednesday due to dinner at the inlaws which ran into 9pm.  Maybe that’s why I felt so rubbish last night…a day off made me feel like I was starting over.  However, I have some incentive in the very near future…I’m going to be working with a brilliant woman called Wendy Powell at No More Excuses who will be doing some guest blogging on Cafe Bebe to help out the women of the world who are struggling just like me!  Stay tuned to Cafe Bebe for more information…it’s gonna be good!  Also, I’m going to be taking part in a new campaign for a BIG trainer company that rhymes with FleeCrok…I’ll keep you posted on that one as well.  It just might be some incentive for you as well!  Thanks for sticking with me on this one…I promise to do my level best as long as you’re with me.  Mummy Tummy Begone!

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The time has come, my friends.  We have had an amazing response for the first Just Vlog It Challenge and Heather and I are totally thrilled.  The world of vlogging is not so scary and intimidating after all, is it??  In total, there were 20 vlog entries for the “Teach Us Something” challenge.  And boy did you have a lot to teach us!  From laundry tips to the circle of life; from stripteases to Coq au Dotterel…so much to learn!  It was a very tough decision to narrow it down to two nominees for the public vote but we’ve done it.  I bring you your finalists, in no particular order (dramatic pause to irritate the viewers…):

• A Mother’s Ramblings- An Instructional Video
• Young & Younger- Young & Younger Does Big Brother

Now it’s over to you, the Blogging/Vlogging public to chose.  We are using PollDaddy as our voting platform.  Voting will run from Thursday 11 March-Friday 12 March (midnight).  You can vote once for the vlogger of your choice.  The winner will be announced on Saturday 13 March.  Ready, steady, vote…

We would like to thank the brilliant vloggers who worked so hard to produce such amazing vlogs.  We are really touched with the effort that was taken to join in on the fun.  Now, if you haven’t made the public vote, please don’t be discouraged!  Keep vlogging, keep coming back here and at Notes from Lapland for more vlogging inspiration.  We’ve got our theme for April and are lining up the sponsors as well.  We think you’re going to love it!  And don’t forget there’s the Just Vlog It Challenge Carnival which will be held at Notes from Lapland on Monday 15 March where ALL of the entries will be linked for your viewing pleasure.

Thanks, also, to our brilliant prize sponsor- The Slanket.  Here’s the prize winning style for you to snuggle up in:

The Slanket- Just Vlog It style

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The Just Vlog It Challenge for March- Teach Us Something is underway and I, along with the gorgeous Heather at Notes from Lapland, am FLOORED with the response we’ve received!  There are 20 (count ‘em) entries!  20 brave and talented bloggers are dipping their toes into the Vlogging pond!  The videos are outstanding, with some really running with the theme and their editing skills!  Honestly, we had no idea it could get this good!  And with a precious Slanket as our prize, who wouldn’t want to win!

Of course, it’s not just about winning though, is it?  Truly…Heather and I have a tough decision ahead of us.  And I want to STRESS that if you have submitted an entry to the Just Vlog It challenge and aren’t one of the two we choose to go up for the public vote, PLEASE don’t be disheartened.  We do not want the competition side to put anyone off or make someone NOT want to participate.  This is why we will also be hosting a Just Vlog It Challenge Carnival on one of our blogs the week after the winner is announced.  We want EVERYONE to see what brilliant vloggers are out there!

So here is the schedule for the next few days:  today…a day of rest!  Tomorrow and Friday (11/12 March) will be Public Voting here at Cafe Bebe.  We will announce the winner on Saturday 13 March on BOTH Notes from Lapland and Cafe Bebe and then on Monday 15 March (my hubby’s birthday, if you’d like to send cards) Heather will host the Just Vlog It Challenge Carnival at Notes from Lapland.  Simples!  On behalf of myself and Heather, we would like to thank everyone who has taken valuable family time to enter the FIRST Just Vlog It Challenge.  See you back here tomorrow morning!

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Tom Petty is one of my least favourite singers/performers BUT, I do like the title of his song “Running Down a Dream”.  It’s what I’m trying to do right now…a dream of a healthier me who feels better, looks better and can’t be beat!  Last night I managed day two of my Run/Walk plan for world domination health and fitness.  Hubby got home late, there was a Balance Bike to be put together and no dinner on the table at 8:00pm.  I could have packed it in but I didn’t.  Hubby took over with Little Miss, I put my headphones in and my jacket and gloves on and walked out of the door.

There is something about running/walking at night.  The air was cool and crisp; there was a light mist in the air and it was SILENT.  I popped my headphones in and searched for “Glee” on the iPod and noticed that my battery was almost completely flat.  I nearly went back in the house!  But, I was determined to see it through, “Glee” soundtrack or no.  I set off on a clockwise path around the village and marched on to “Don’t Stop Believin’”.  When I reached the end of the paved footpath up to the school and turned onto the dirt path around the side of the school, I broke into my shuffly-run.  It actually didn’t feel half-bad!  My initial plan was not to worry about a clock but instead set physical distances to try to achieve.  My goal was to get by the school and then walk but when I got to the pavement at the front of the school I carried on all the way to the corner by the pub (you know where that is, don’t you??).  I ran ALL THAT WAY!  I know you don’t know where and how far that is but for me, it was FAR!  I did a brisk walk along the next stretch of pavement and then ran from the local shop front to nearly the corner of the next turning.  I almost made it as far as I wanted…it’s amazing how your body just says, “NO…STOP!”

When I turned the corner, at a semi-brisk walk (my feet were getting MUCH heavier) the “Glee” stopped!  Literally.  Damn…right after “Gold Digger” and everything.  I had to complete the remainder of my walk without the cast of “Glee” urging me on.  But I finished with a final run push all the way to the lamp post on my road and then walked the rest of the block down to my house.  I was out for about 20 minutes, I suppose (I really have to start keeping better track of this) and have realised that my village is VERY SMALL but will plot out a few more streets to add a bit of length to the run/walk adventure.  I got back in the house with BURNING tibialis anterior muscles and a bit of a wheeze in my asthmatic lungs but I FELT GOOD!  What the heck?  Who knew?  Hubby was getting Little Miss ready for bed and all was right with the world.

I was a bit stiff this morning but feel better than I have in quite some time.  Thanks to some comments on my One Small Step I am beginning to wonder if I might have a bit of a gluten intolerance.  I have really cut back on my bread intake the last two days and I have no heartburn and don’t feel AS bloated (I’m sure you wanted to know that).  It would make my sad to be gluten intolerant as I LOVE bread and any form of Carbohydrate but perhaps for me, just cutting down dramatically will make a difference?  Baby steps…  Are you taking up the Mummy Tummy Begone Challenge as well?  What have you accomplished this week?  My run/walk might have to be in the light of day today as we’re at the inlaws for dinner and I might not be able to manage a run/walk after that.  I quite like the security of run/walking at night.  No one can see me!  And it’s so quiet…other than the sound of the cast of “Glee” in my ears.  Run/Walk tips are now called for…what works for you?  What’s your favourite music to run/walk to?

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I blogged this morning about a personal challenge.  Mummy Tummy Begone, is the name it’s been christened.  I’m fed up with the way I feel and the way I look and let’s face it, no one is going to do it for me so the time has come.

There was a very encouraging response and a plethora of comments from Mums everywhere who have struggled with the same thing that I am battling.  In particular, I am finding that a lot of Mums who are 1-2 years post delivery are in the same place as me which is comforting but also tells me that there’s something missing out there in the health & fitness world.  I’m hoping that the ladies who have commented and whom I have emailed will join me in this uphill climb.  I’ve even made a badge!

I’ve made some great progress on day one, I must say!  Little Miss and I went to the grocery store and bought a lot of fruit & veg, some good protein and NO BISCUITS or SNACKS whatsoever!  I had salad & veg for lunch accompanied by 2 Ryvita crisps with hummous spread (very thinly I might add) plus a handful of grapes.  I had a Cup of Soup for a snack and a VERY sensible dinner of chicken breast, roasted vegetables and couscous.  We even ate at the sensible hour of 7pm!

Here was the real achievement though!  Once hubby came home (around 6:15 tonight), I got my iPod which had been loaded with the “Glee” soundtrack earlier in the day, layered up and went out for a walk/run while hubby stayed with Little Miss.  I walked briskly down the street to “Don’t Stop Believin’” with a right kick in my step!  Then I tried running…holy.crap.  I think I have forgotten how to run!  I ran for about 40 seconds.  When I stopped, my feet could barely keep stepping.  The muscle that runs on the front of your shin (tibialis anterior, thank you very much) was in spasm.  It didn’t know how to cope with the minimal strain!  It took me several minutes for my normal gait to return!  I was battling with my iPod as well.  The headphones wouldn’t stay in my ears and I was trying to use the stopwatch feature to time my 1 minute of walking and 1 minute of running.

I persevered however.  I somehow managed to do another 3 stints of 60 second running but I needed quite a few more minutes in between those 60 second intervals to function properly.  I haven’t felt such pain in a long time!  The music helped.  The darkness helped.  I started to feel better and eventually feel quite good.  I was out walking and sort-of-running for all of about 30 minutes but it was a start.  I think I will still include running but I’m going to space it out differently.  I might attempt 5 minutes of speed walking and 1 minute of running.  Advice on this matter is much appreciated.

I arrived back home moderately exhilerated and got dinner on the table and enjoyed a healthy meal with my family.  I feel good and for the first time in a while am still full and not suffering from heartburn.  Day one is one small step for Cafe Bebe, one giant leap for Karin!  I may not be able to pick up my feet tomorrow or negotiate the stairs but I’m starting and will continue.  I promise I won’t bore you every day with a post about what I ate or the fact that I did manage to walk outside but I will share my baby steps throughout the week.  I hope you don’t mind and I hope you will join me in the challenge.  I’m going to take some ibuprofen now…I may be cursing Marathon Mummy Rachael tomorrow.

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Mummy Tummy Queen

Too many pancakes?

Finding unflattering pictures of yourself isn’t the most exhilerating thing in the entire world.  However, in my quest to make my Mummy Tummy Begone, I had to find something to start with.  The first picture is from Little Miss’ first birthday week (taken on June 5, 2009) and the second picture is from 14 January, 2010 at the Lyle’s Syrup Pancake Day event in London.  It was at said event that something happened that I had been waiting for.  Someone asked me “And when’s your next one due?”  I replied, “Uh…oh, no, I’m not pregnant, I’m just fat!” and laughed a bit to make the person feel better.  I’m good at that…making people feel better.  I didn’t feel very happy, however.

I shall back-track a bit for those of you who don’t know me or my tummy very well.  When I was pregnant with Little Miss, I put on a good 3-4 stone on a frame that was already overweight.  Fish and chips had taken their toll long before Little Miss was implanted and I took full advantage of every craving, every extra muffin and every indulgence possible while she was growing.  Rude people Co-Workers asked if I was sure there weren’t twins in there and “WHEN are you due?”  So helpful and kind.

Little Miss was born by emergency c-section on 3 June, 2008 and thus began my struggle with my maladjusted mid-section.  I was amazed at how, every day after delivery, my middle shrank bit by bit…sort of like a balloon gradually deflating.  However, not long after coming home, the deflating stopped.  And that’s just about where I have stayed ever since.  Approaching 2 years is a long time to be carrying about far too much weight and having no shape.  I’ve had a bit working against me though.  My expanding middle couldn’t quite expand enough and I ended up with an umbilical hernia as well as, in my humble opinion, VERY distended abdominal muscles (diastis recti anyone?).  In my concern over my now-permanent “outie” belly button, I was referred to a consultant to see about a possible hernia operation.  I was told by said consultant, that I could have the hernia operation but it wouldn’t do anything for my abdominal muscles, if I was considering having another child there was no point in having the op and that I should lose weight.  Helpful, that consultant!  Of course, he was right I guess.  I also was referred to a physiotherapist to learn exercises to “knit” back together my abdominal muscles.  (That sounds icky doesn’t it??)

Now, here’s where the problem lies.  I was told to lose weight and do specific exercises.  Did I do it?  No.  Well, I did do the exercises for a while but then I stopped.  Did I lose weight?  Well, maybe a pound or two but then there was Christmas and then New Year’s and then Valentine’s Day and then St. David’s Day (any excuse…) and here I am.  Hopelessly out of shape, wrecked abdominals, pain, a stomach (the internal organ) that sloshes about (will it actually fall out?  I wonder!) and thoroughly deflated opinion of myself.  I must do SOMETHING.  We don’t have money for a gym or a piece of exercise equipment and time is a factor as I’m home alone with Little Miss from 8am-7pm most nights of the week so I will share with you my plan.  It’s not ideal but it will have to do.  If I share it with my blogging community, I am therefore forced to follow through on it.  Unless I delete this all! (HA)

I have approximately 12 weeks until Little Miss’ second birthday.  I have to make a dent in the me I that I am today.

• Stop eating RUBBISH!  I have a pretty carbohydate-centered diet.  Toast, Rice Krispies for breakfast, Rich Tea bisquit for snack, pasta/chips/sandwich for lunch (not all of them, either/or), Rich Tea bisquit for snack, finishing Little Miss’ dinner for her (waste not…), Dinner with hubby at 9pm or later consisting of: jacket potatoes, beans, pasta, quiche…very little veg/protein.
• Stop clearing Little Miss’ plate!
• Eat MY dinner with Little Miss and aim for a lean protein, low-GI carb & veg
• Alternate the following for exercise:  get up in the morning (6am) and go for a walk/run BEFORE the day begins and while hubby is at home for Little Miss or when hubby comes home at night go for a walk/run at the END of the day while hubby is at home for Little Miss
• Walk/RUN!  I have been inspired by Rachael at Marathon Mummy to start a bit of running.  Rachael is not a runner but she very well may be now after just completing her personal Half-Marathon training over the weekend.  I am going to start with a very simple walk 1 min/run 1 min and see what I can work myself up to in the next 12 weeks.  I have to state for the record that I HATE RUNNING and really wouldn’t consider it unless CHASED but, my tummy is about to start chasing me and I don’t want to see that!  Also, according to many who’ve done it, it’s a great fat burner and perhaps the kick in the pants that I need.  I guarantee you will not find me running any marathons or even a half-marathon any time in the near or distant future but we all need to start somewhere, don’t we?
• Find time during Little Miss’ naps to peel my ass away from the computer and do the EA Sports Active Personal Trainer programme and/or abdominal exercises.  My ass is taking on a decidedly flat appearance so I must do this.
• Get thee to a FEMALE doctor who may be able to help with my midsection and tell me, point blank, if it’s just my laziness and excess weight that is causing my abdominal pain and discomfort or something that can possibly be fixed with medical intervention in addition to proper eating, exercise and weight loss.

If I could manage to lose a pound a week over the next twelve weeks, I could make a good dent in my mummy tummy and feel a bit better about the way I look.  Then maybe, just maybe, Claire at The Good, The Bad & The Ugly could give me some fashion tips to help disguise what’s left.  I will be blogging about my progress in this category (Mummy Tummy Begone) and will keep you posted.  I’d love to feel confident enough to share my weight with you BUT I don’t know that I’m ready to share those numbers with the world.  They’re embarassing!  However, suffice it to say that if I lose 1 pound a week for the next 12 weeks, I will lose nearly a stone which will be a massive accomplishment.  A very sensible time line, for sure.

I would appreciate any tips and/or encouragement that you might want to offer as this will be an uphill battle for me.  I used to be fit and healthy and worked out all the time…of course, I worked in a fitness centre so that makes a bit of a difference!  If you’d like to join me, I’ll be making a badge to use…you can do it too!  I’d love to have a little bit of support if you’re willing.

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New Zealand Flag

US Flag

The delightful world of blogging has allowed me to get to meet so many brilliant people and Vegemitevix is one of them.  We’re kindred spirits, in fact.  Vegemitevix is a Kiwi (from New Zealand) who came to England much the same as I did.  For the love of an Englishman.  She and her Englishman have a similar love of Paris as well as I found out on her lovely post A Girl Guide in Paris.  You can read more about her life and adventures at http://vegemitevix.com.  I think you’ll love her writing and tales as much as I do.  Vegemitevix has this to say about herself:

Vegemitevix moved from the seaside city of Auckland in New Zealand to a small rural town in Hampshire in August 2008, to follow the love of a Englishman she met on holiday in Paris in 2007. She took along for the ride, her kids (two teens and a tweenie) the family pets, twenty boxes of earthly possessions and guts! Swapping pavlova for pork pies, beautiful beaches for Blighty and sun, sea and surf for snow and sleet, Vegemitevix blogs stories from the expat frontline.

I now bring you Vegemitevix’ guest post for my Friday offering.  It’s all about being an expat…something I know just a bit about.  If you’d like to read my post on Vegemitevix’ blog…head on over there after you read this one.  My post is entitled “Pork Pies and Other Faux Pas”…it’s a corker!

Things I’ve learnt from being an Expat

This is my third experience of living the expat life. I spent my early life living in a gold-mining town of Vatakoula in Fiji, I spent my kids’ early lives in Brisbane, Australia and now I’m here – in Hampshire, UK.

New Zealand’s national bird and icon is the flightless kiwi – a discreet brown little bird who forages for food on the forest floor! Yet Kiwis have a reputation for lots of travel. Who says Kiwi’s can’t fly? Huh!

I’ve learnt so much from being an expat. Some silly things, some trivial, some deep…and…meaningful, some things about the world, the universal way of things and some sometimes alarmingly revealing things, about myself.

Here’s a few of them.

You wouldn’t go into someone’s home and tell them they had a small house, you didn’t like the food and laugh at their accent, would you? It’s never a good idea to complain about your host country and compare it with home. It’s hard to not do this. At first everything is so new and different and interesting, but after a while the exotic light dims and the comparisons begin. My son (aged 14 when he first arrived in England) would often come out with terribly embarrassing comments such as

‘I got really lost on the way back cos all the houses look the same’.

And in answer to questions about whether he’d found a girlfriend at school.

‘No, all the girls are really fat in England. (He wasn’t trying to be rude, it’s not quite such an outdoorsy lifestyle here and he just lacks social graces sometimes..)

Ahem. Moving on…

Your home country’s national dish may be pickled turnips on a bed of fattened frog’s livers, but nothing in your new country will ever hold a candle to it. I will never understand what is so appealing about Cornish pasties. To me they are a heart-attack wrapped up in a stroke! Who would enjoy stewed mince meat and bland potatoes and veg swimming in coloured cardboard gravy, wrapped up in soggy pastry?

My Englishman!

He comes over all nostalgic and moist-eyed when he sees one. I don’t get it! But then he doesn’t get my favourite food, oysters. I particularly love Bluff oysters from the deep south of New Zealand! He doesn’t understand the attraction of what looks to him like the contents of a sailor’s spittoon and tastes like fermented cough mixture!

I’ve discovered that being an expat will do crazy things to your memory. You will all of a sudden magically memorise every single word of your national anthem, (even the Maori words that you used to mumble!) and you will be prone to bursting into song at any minor sporting triumph. You’ll remember the words and actions to the Haka despite the fact that it’s a Maori man’s ceremonial war dance. And you’re a woman! You’ll watch every All Blacks’ game you can (NZ’s national rugby team), despite the fact you loathed rugby and despaired of your rugby idolising nation!

Memories tinged with homesickness become more vivid when you’re an expat.

You’ll remember a hotter sun, a longer summer, a keener surf, and an easier lifestyle, at home. No doubt the grass is greener there too, despite the fact it doesn’t rain as much as here in England.

Nowhere has as much rain as England!

I’ve been here over 18 months now and I’ve been amazed at how few Kiwis live in my neck of the words. I haven’t met one fellow Kiwi – with familiar squashed dipthongs and flattened vowels – in this little town. This sad search for fellow countrymen and women lead me to throwing myself at a man at the Basingstoke Ocktoberfest who was wearing a t-shirt with a Kiwi advertising slogan on it – ‘Yeah right’. (It’s advertising for a beer called Tui) Keen on making friends I bounded up to him like a friendly Labrador, patted him on the back and said about the rapidly diminishing beer supplies at the festival

‘Beer at a beerfest, yeah right’

He gave me that look that silently asked ‘How long until your meds?’

I tried to explain but failed in light of the fact he was English and the t-shirt was a gift. I hurriedly lost myself in the crowd.

It’s possibly a blessing in disguise that there aren’t many Kiwis living nearby, as there’s no way I can loose myself in a clicque of countrymen. I’ve had to assimilate, though I’ve learnt to be careful to remain true to myself and my identity. I have to encourage the kids to not pick up the local accent. I was horrified when my ten year old daughter came home talking…

‘like is, dropping the ‘t’s in words like, y’know like wah-a not water’. I got her to drop it immediately. The fake accent. Not the t’s.

Being an expat makes you an immediate expert about everything that comes from your home country. At times you become something of a walking talking tour guide. Lord of the Rings? I know all the scene locations. America’s Cup – I was there wearing lucky red socks! How to shear a sheep….um….I’m a city girl!

Everyone you meet knows someone who lives in New Zealand, and they want to know if you know that someone too.

‘Where are you from’ asks the key cutting engraver.

‘Auckland, New Zealand’s major city’

‘OOOOOh I know Fred and Martha Anderson they live in Auckland. Do you know them?’

Patient look. Faint pleasant smile.

‘No sorry I don’t think I’ve come across them.’

There’s just under 2 million people in Auckland. I’m a friendly girl, but not that friendly! I don’t know everyone!

I’ve learnt so much from being an expat.

The most important lesson of all I think, is how deeply unsettling homesickness can be. It creeps up on you not on the dull dark days, but when everything is working out well. When the sun’s shining and the new family dynamics are working out. There’s no explanation, and often no warning when homesickness will strike. Learning how to work through it has been one of the major lessons of my life. After all it’s simply learning how to deal with change. Our whole lives we are travelling from place to place (emotionally if not physically) from age to age, from circumstance to new circumstance. Learning how to cope with change has meant that I am painting myself with resilience. I’m adapting and growing.

I’m forever learning and that is a very precious lesson indeed.

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Battling my demons

There’s a tug of war going on inside of me.  I wonder why I write.  I wonder who’s reading what I write.  I wonder why I don’t get the comments I think I should.  I wonder why, despite the hours of time promoting it, my blog isn’t doing better.  I wonder why the pitches I write seem to go unnoticed.  I wonder why the suggestions I make are ignored.  I wonder why I can’t made myself be heard.

There’s a tug of war going on inside of me.  I used to be sexy and confident.  I used to weigh far less.  I used to have a twinkle in my eye.  I want to be those things again but I’m not sure I know how any longer.  Do I hide behind the new me because I don’t want to work that hard?

There’s a tug of war going on inside of me.  I want to be the best mum my daughter deserves.  I want to be a good cook and go the extra mile.  I want to entertain my daughter and be everything she needs.  But…I can’t seem to find the mojo to cook like Nigella or Delia.  I can’t seem to find the skill to be crafty like Mr. Maker.  I can’t seem to let my daughter just be…I’m forever meddling…am I doing the right things?  I’d like to think so but I fear I’m not.

There’s a tug of war going on inside of me.  I want to be a friend.  I want to have friends.  I want my daughter to have friends.  But I can’t seem to get myself out there to do it.  Is it the comfort of home?  I make excuses and wish for something different but if I don’t make it happen, who will?

There’s a tug of war going on inside of me.  I’m a good wife, I think.  But I could be better.  I could have our house gleaming from top to toe.  I could have fresh bread baking in the oven and a gorgeous meal waiting on the stove.  I could sew and knit; I could craft and bake.  I could dress better and prettier and take more care with my appearance.  What is stopping me?  Is that REALLY me?

There’s a tug of war going on inside of me…who’s going to win?  Who’s going to jump behind me on my side and help me do it?  Maybe I just need to rely on myself and dig in and pull…

(Written in support of the Writing Workshop at Sleep is for the Weak; prompt #2- Battling your Demons)

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Finally, the theme to the Just Vlog It Challenge for the month of March is TEACH US SOMETHING sponsored by The Slanket and brought to you courtesy of Heather @ Notes from Lapland and me!

Your mission…should you choose to accept it…is to:

• Decide on a subject of your vlog.  You can teach us ANYTHING.  How to make bread, how to say “Happy St. David’s Day” in Welsh, the history of St. Patrick’s Day, how to drink a Guiness properly, what your home is like…anything that helps us to learn!
• Record your vlog entry.  Remember to keep your video to around 4 minutes.  Any longer and we get too tired!
• Upload your video to the platform of your choice.
• Create a post on your site with the vlog embedded.
• Send us the link to your post:  justvlogit[at]hotmail[dot][com] by TUESDAY 9 MARCH (midnight)
• Come back to Cafe Bebe on Thursday 11 March to see if you are one of the lucky 2 vlog posts up for the public vote.  If you aren’t, fear ye not…your post will still be included in our Just Vlog It Teach Us Something Carnival on Monday 15 March at Notes from Lapland.  But still take the time to vote here at Cafe Bebe for the BEST VLOG on Thursday & Friday 11/12 March.  Your fellow vloggers will love you for it.
• Saturday 13 March the winning vlogger will be announced here at Cafe Bebe!  The winner will be the lucky recipient of a SLANKET like this one (the colour will be announced later this week…this is just an example):

It’s just that simple!  We’re giving you until next Tuesday because we know how tricky it can be to get time to vlog and upload and post.  The weekend might be a great time to get all of this done.  I’ve vlogged some helpful tips on how to have a successful parent vlog and there are some other great vlogs out there like Heather’s vlog tour of her farm.  I happened to record a little vlog for another challenge altogether about how to dance like a Disney Princess which ought to give you all the inspiration you might need…or put you off vlogging altogether!

If I can impart one bit of wisdom, in my minimal experience with vlogging, what makes a successful vlog is the willingness to look silly.  I don’t mean that your vlog has to be goofy and crazy (there’s certainly a place for that!) but you have to be willing to let the world see you “warts and all” and not care.  You are not going to be a raving beauty or hunky hunk (well, maybe Tim at Bringing Up Charlie would be), you’re going to be yourself.  That’s what we want to see.  Try not to plan it out too much or stress over it and do take after take.  Try to do one or two takes and let it roll.  Be organic!  I think, in my humble opinion, it translates better.

So, now it’s over to you!  You have until Tuesday 9 March to get your vlog posts up and your links to us.  The winner will be able to wrap up in a gorgeous, snuggly, cuddly Slanket and the rest of us will learn something and probably have a good laugh or two in the process.  This is meant to be fun!  Heather and I are really excited to be bringing you this challenge…we hope you’ll dive in along with us.  Good luck and HAPPY VLOGGING!

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