Youth Ministry Resources from Called to Youth Ministry

Write for Us!

Called to Youth Ministry — Sat, 11 May 2013 02:06:10 +0000

Whew! You made it. The school year is winding down. You've spent the last several months pouring your heart and soul into ministering to a group of teenagers. There were long nights. Hard conversations. And if you were crazy enough there was even a overnight lock-in. But now the year is winding down and you are gearing up for a summer of ministry.

At CTYM, our goal is to be a place where youth workers can provide articles, curriculum, games, and more to each other. We want you to share what you've been up to. Here are some ideas of what we are looking for.

1. Lessons- Do you have lessons that you have written that you can share with other youth pastors? Something that you used throughout the year would be great for another youth pastor to possibly use for a Bible study this summer.

2. Events- Summer is a great time to build community among your students through different events. What type of events have you done in the ministry at your church?

3. Games- Youth Ministry is not all about games....but we still play them. What are the tried and true games that your kids love in the ministry at your church?

4. Youth Ministry Ideas - Do you have any thoughts or ideas about youth ministry in general that you would like to share with others?

If you have the answers to any of these questions, WE WANT YOU TO WRITE FOR US!

If you are interested you can email us here!

[Video] Creatively Presenting Biblical Truth - Watch David Dorn #YPchurch

Nate Dame — Fri, 22 Mar 2013 11:50:00 +0000

How do you creatively present the Gospel in today's techno-crazy culture? Is YouTube an effective medium for communicating God's truth with students?

David Dorn says yes! After sharpening his YouTube experience as one of the very first YouTube Partners, David has kick-started several exciting video discipleship programs.

Watch David's message from the last Youth Pastor Church below. And don't forget to RSVP for the next #YPchurch LIVE!

Get in touch with David!

Twitter: @daviddorn2, @IamPreposterous
YouTube: The Pursuit Blog, Preposterous Project

And especially PreposterousProject.org!

Below are some notes from David's wild crazy out-of-the-box message and the pratical tips he shared in the video. Enjoy!

Creatively Presenting Biblical Truth

Ask questions. Ask questions about what can be done better, what are the needs of the people you are serving. Ask if people are willing to help. Ask for feedback. I’m relentless about getting feedback and polling. And when you ask questions, be ok with not always getting an answer. Creative people are often ok with not having an answer. I find that the lack of an answer makes me push more to reach the next level of creativity. And when you ask someone for their opinion, be ok with it being completely different from yours. Creativity needs pushback. Welcome it. Don’t take it personally.

Carve out time to allow yourself to be creative. I’m a planner. I plan my spontaneity. Plan times to be creative. One practice that has impacted me is every semester I go get a hotel room for a night in town. $60 and a good meal does wonders for one’s prayer time and creativity. God and I have good planning sessions on those weekends.

Take a sabbath. You’re too busy to not take one. Give yourself rest and you’ll allow yourself to think clearer.

Watch, read, and listen to creative things. It’s ok if its secular. If truth is true where you find it, then take the truth behind their creativity and use it.

I love YouTube. It’s a global community of creative people. Watch guys like Ze Frank. The Vlog Brothers, John and Hank Green who have gone on to launch channels like Sci Show, and Crash Course are amazingly creative people. SoulPancake is the channel that gave us Kid President, but they do so much more asking deep questions about the meaning of life and spirituality. MysteryGuitarman does brilliant musically creative things. Philip DeFranco was a guy who started off making videos off his webcam in his dorm room. Now he runs a production studio, has hundreds of millions of views, employs like 20 people, and makes 6 figures a year, and did all the YouTube political coverage this past year including interviewing the VP. He’s been one of my biggest influences.

I listen to music that inspires. Whether its Josh Garrels, Mumford and Sons, Florence and the Machine, etc. Find what inspires you and dig into it.

Read brilliant stuff. Fiction too. Read The Fault in Our Stars or The Undertaking. Read stuff that inspires you.

Brain storm. A good friend taught me that when you get into the zone, to just jot down as many ideas as you can. Don’t stop to consider the practicality of any of them. Just write. Once you’re done you can sort through what works, what could work down the road, and what was idiotic.

Try. Fail. Try again. It’s ok to fail. Too many of us in ministry are perfectionists, to a fault. We may not try because we don’t want to fail. Failure teaches us more than we know.

Pray. Ask God to help you do what He created you to do.

All of these elements help set a framework for continued creativity. Regularly examine what you are doing, and ask those questions again and again, checking on your effectiveness.

Ideas to Get You Started

Make videos!

First, document everything. Go to a concert? Video it. Do interviews afterwards Go on a retreat? Video it. Do interviews afterwards. Have a special night at youth group? Video it. Do interviews afterwards. You don’t have know know how to work a camera well. Film it on your phone if need be (check your church’s rules about safe-sanctuary, and get parent’s permission in the permission slips to video their kids). It’s simple and easy. Point and shoot. Show this to your congregation, or budget committees. Post this online for students to show their friends.
- Make funny videos. Do an Old Testament series having kids film skits of the Characters. This way it forces them to dig into Scripture and have fun at the same time. Not only will you have the potential to reach a wide audience, but you have the potential of your youth telling others about your youth group.
Make testimony videos. Kids often won’t stand up in front of a room of people to tell their testimony, but they very well may go on video. Have a record of what God is doing in your group. If everyone is ok with it, post it to social media. Good content is good content, and good content make a difference.
Make videos of you. Sit down and record a message to all your kids. If you are going to miss a week, connect with them. I know people who develop whole curriculums for their students through video just for them.

Write Content

You have a unique voice. Use it. Write. Write quickly lest fear catch up with you.

Youth may not read what you write, but the adults in the church will. Do a series coming out of what has been going on in your youth group. Or you can address hard topics through written word so you can choose your words carefully.

Be creative!
You don’t have to have mastery over technology to be creative. Your youth are much more brilliant than most of us when it comes to technology. Unleash their creativity.

Other Ideas
- Instagram competition - select a theme and have them go find and Instagram something that fits that theme
- Have them go and do street interviews as a scavenger hunt.
- Have them tweet questions they have during the youth service.
- Challenge them to vlog their life for a week while studying a certain verse.
- Drive around town knocking on doors asking for canned good for the local food pantry. Get the kids out doing something quick and simple to make a real difference.
- Make a list of needed items for the local women’s shelter, and divide your kids up into a few small groups. Give each $20 and see how many items they can get for that much as a competition.

Entering Your Students' World

Danielle Christy — Thu, 21 Mar 2013 13:21:29 +0000

Building healthy relationships with your students is one of the most important aspects of youth ministry. When a student knows you care about them they are more willing not only to listen to what you’re saying but also to trust you. One way youth leaders can build those relationships is to care about what the students care about. How can we do that?

1. Attend their events

If your students are involved in a musical, buy tickets and go. If your students play football, find a game where they’re playing another student or their record is on the line and go and support them. Whatever your students’ passions, talents, and hobbies are, find ways to be in the crowd to support them.

2. Look for conversation starters

Get to know your students’ interests, favorite sports teams, a new book they’re reading, or something they’re looking forward to. When they walk into youth group have some of those interests in mind when you greet them. Those conversation starters not only break the ice but show your students that you’ve been listening to them.

3. Know their school’s climate

Is there a scandal happening at their school that everyone’s talking about? Is there a decision that the school is making that could impact your students? Find ways to be in the loop about what’s occurring at your students’ schools, from being present at impactful school board meetings to reading up on decisions in the newspaper. A majority of your students’ worlds are at their school and when big things are happening there, if you’re in the loop, you’ll be able to speak into those situations.

4. Be a part of celebrations

Be present for celebrations big and small. Whether it’s a birthday party, baptism, an award they’re receiving, if your student is being honored try to be there, even if it’s for only a few minutes. When a student is being celebrated, the people that show up speak more to their hearts than your words can say.

5. Get to know their parents

A student’s family and home is the other part of his or her world. By getting to know their parents you are earning the entire family’s trust. A student may be more willing to open up to you if their parents trust you; a parent may be more willing to have you as a part of their child’s life if they know you.

Paul said to the church in Corinth,

“ Though I am free and belong to no one, I have made myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.” 1 Corinthians 9:19-23 NIV

We can’t be everything to everyone but we can show the students that God has entrusted to us that we are there for them. If we can find ways to cheer them on, to talk to them, to know their world, and to celebrate them, we can show our students that we care about them as individuals and not just as a number. When our students believe that we care about them, they’ll open up more and be more of themselves around us. Students want to know that when their life is good you’ll cheer them on so that way when their life falls apart they know you’ll be there to help them pick it back up again.

Mandatory Mentoring

Aaron Stief — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 16:00:00 +0000

Whether you’re a full-time, part-time, or insane volunteer youth leader, you’ve heard it before. We need to be connecting with students. Yes, is it important for students, but this discussion is about the irreplaceable value for you in mentoring students. It seems so basic, so foundational, and so simple but this incredibly vital and powerful action often gets lost in the midst of schedules, programs, planning, meetings, personality types, and a hundred other things. If we’re honest, some are better at relationships than others. It’s like they are hardwired for socializing. It’s as if God put them on this earth just to remind all of us what “connecting” is really supposed to look like. And then there are others who find it ulcer producing to have a prolonged conversation with anyone, let alone a teenage student. Regardless of who you are, God made you for relationships. Nothing new, I know, but a good reminder still. After all, God tells us that the world will know that we are His by the way we love one another (John 13:35). Then in 1 Corinthians 12:26 Paul talks about the church (us) rejoicing with one another and feeling sorrow with one another. We are made to be connected, but that is sometimes more easily said than done. I found myself in this situation a couple of years ago. Direct hang-out and mentoring time with students was nearly squeezed out of my schedule entirely until my senior pastor stepped in (in a good way) and made connection time a mandatory priority in my schedule. Here are a couple of important lessons I learned along the way.

1.Mandatory means priority.

Maybe you are the type of person who foregoes details, strategy, and release form chasing in order to pursue connecting and mentoring time with students. If so, this one probably isn’t an issue for you. But I needed a firm hand to hold me to the fire of mentoring students. I had to build 9+ hours of student connection into each week. Believe me, this was a hard transition as none of the other tasks that I was juggling were allowed to drop. It forced me to look at how I could bring students alongside what I was already doing. I began meeting with students to review my upcoming lesson. During one series, I took the time I normally would use for message prep and used it to mentor a group of students so they were teaching. Making student connection time and mentoring mandatory forced me into a much better place, both for my students and me. I knew them better. They had more opportunities to fail and succeed. And they grew more. Do yourself a favor: make mentoring a student mandatory in your schedule. Add it to your calendar first, then let the other things fill in around it.

2. Not everything needs to be a Bible study.

I had to relax. I don’t know about you but there was always this voice in my head telling me I needed to make every connection a Bible study. After all, I was on the clock. I was receiving hard-earned tithe dollars from our church members and attenders. These connection times certainly needed to involve more than video games, fast food, and watching YouTube. But then again, maybe not. As I just relaxed and eased into hanging out with students, questions came up naturally. Defenses came down, walls crumbled, and conversations were freer. I witnessed first hand how relational credits in the bank (from simply “being” with students) paid off in their desire to ask for and receive advice.

3.Always be on the lookout for God moments.

Yeah, yeah, it looks like I am contradicting myself after saying not everything has to be a Bible study, but life is filled with those God moments. One of my favorite verses since becoming a parent myself is Deuteronomy 11:19, “Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up” (NIV). Always keep your eye out for those moments to glorify God. Even better yet, always look for those moments to steer students to recognizing God’s fingerprint in their lives. Unless you are looking for those moments, they will more than likely slip right by you.

4.Gain an accurate picture of the core of your students.

These days there is an overwhelming supply of youth ministry resources, ideas, and advice (this blog post included). Read all the books you want. Read all the blogs you want. Even creep on all your students’ Facebook and Instagram accounts you want. You will never really know a student until you spend regular time with him or her. Everything else only helps piece the outer framework of the puzzle together, but in order to see the complete picture, you need to see the core of your students’ lives. Spending real, regular, face-to-face time with students helps you see the core . You’ll understand your youth, your context, and ultimately how you can reach their hearts better.

5. A reminder of the power of listening.

And finally, never forget to listen. Especially in the amplified culture where our students live day-in and day-out, we need to be a listening ear for them. Listen to what they are saying, not just for the trigger that will allow you to share your nuggets of wisdom. Let them take the floor, stand on their soapbox, and vent if need be. Be genuine and be true, but listen intently.

None of us got into youth ministry to run the best program ever, to lead the best small group discussions ever, or even host the smoothest event ever. We are in youth ministry to see God change lives. I encourage you to make mentoring students mandatory in your schedule for them, you, and your ministry.

What other tips would you share for healthy mentoring??

Build Relationships Exponentially

BrianLucas — Tue, 12 Mar 2013 16:49:35 +0000

Moses is arguably one of the best leaders in history. He followed God into some crazy situations and confrontations with Pharaoh; he led hundreds of thousands from freedom to slavery; he continued to lead, despite grumbling and opposition, and never lost track of where his vision came from.
But he did it all by himself. This is not more praise for him, but less. He did it alone, and that set him up for failure. In Exodus 18, Moses is visited by his father-in-law, Jethro, who tells him that this is a bad situation. Jethro sees all of Israel coming to Moses for judgement on everything from doctrine to minor property disputes. Rather than just criticize, Jethro gives Moses some game-changing advice (which all of us in leadership need to follow): "You can't do this alone... recruit help." And he did.

Exodus 18:24-26 NIV
Moses listened to his father-in-law and did everything he said. He chose capable men from all Israel and made them leaders of the people, officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens. They served as judges for the people at all times. The difficult cases they brought to Moses, but the simple ones they decided themselves.

As the leader, you will die if you are the only one leading and building relationships. Multiply and "replace" yourself and you will find leadership to be much easier and rewarding. It is crucial to recruit quality leaders, and empower them to take on part of the load of the ministry, by building meaningful relationships with a few students. Here are five ways to get started:

1. CAST THE VISION: You can't have people help you if you don't know what you're doing. Figure out the vision for the ministry, and then do everything you can to over-communicate it to your leaders. This helps everyone to work toward a common goal, and allows them the freedom to run when they know what direction to take.

2. 4-LAYER LEADERSHIP: Amazingly, the Bible has some things to say about leadership. 2 Timothy 2:2 NIV "And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others." There are four different positions here: Paul (1), writing to Timothy (2), who is to entrust this to reliable people (3) who will teach others (4). We should strive to always be in the second layer here. So, you have to be receiving something from a leader above you (or you’ll stop growing and become stagnant). Then find good leaders and train them. But don’t let them sit on this. They have to pass it on as well. If everyone sees themselves as a second layer leader, they are always passing on what they receive with the intent of the next person passing it on as well. This is the model my pastor is implementing at our church across the board and it is very effective.
So, train your leaders to pass on what they get from you to the students. And not just for it to stop there, but teach the students in a way that they are encouraged and empowered to pass it on to others as well. (Bonus: this ends up fulfilling the Great Commission as well!)

3. TRAIN THEM WELL: What have you learned about building relationships with students? Pass these things on to your leaders to help them. Offer small group training, leader retreats, online resources, etc. Again, "entrust these things to others..." Pass on everything you know about this. (Bonus: In building relationships with your leaders, you will help set an example for how they duplicate this themselves.)

4. SET THEM UP FOR SUCCESS: Use spiritual gifts inventories, personality tests, and even Strengths Finder to help your leaders identify their strengths and abilities. Then have them serve where their strengths are. If you have a leader who is into gaming, put him over a small group with kids that have that in common. Get creative... I once had a leader come to me who wanted to get involved, but she didn't feel that she was young enough/cool enough to be a small group leader and play games with students. So we asked her to run the snack bar and be a greeter for us. She started sending me weekly emails with the names she learned each week, and the students dubbed her the "snack bar momma". Great relationships were happening, SUCCESS!

5. LEAD BY EXAMPLE: There is another point that my pastor is training us to utilize... and it comes from the medical profession. Watch me. Help me. Show me. Have leaders watch you hanging out with students and building relationships. Then bring them along and do it together. Then have them build a few on their own.

That's it. Jesus died to restore relationship with us. We are most like him when we are building godly relationships with each other and with students, and encouraging one another toward deeper relationships with God.

How do you train, equip, and empower your volunteers?

5 Reasons that Relationships with Students Matter

timprice — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 16:34:08 +0000

As with anything in life, relationships matter. It’s not always about what you know, but who you know. That’s true for the corporate world, for the music industry and for lots of other places in life.

When I think of building relationships in student ministry, however, the reverse is often true; it may not be our need for us to know students, but it sure is a need for students to know us.

Let’s do an experiment: I want you to think of the single most influential person in your life when you were a teen. If you are thinking of more than one person, quickly narrow it down to one just for this exercise. Now, if you are like many youth workers I am privileged to lead on a regular basis, the one person you are probably thinking of from your teen years is an adult. Hal Hamilton taught me that "a student will gravitate toward the oldest person who will take them seriously." I have found that to be the case.

Jesus built relationships with people. He had a relationship with the masses and he was publicly known. He had a relationship with the crowds and many followed him, such as the seventy he sent out. He had a personal mentoring relationship with twelve and he had yet a deeper friendship with three. It’s through the life of Christ that we see that relationships with students are important. But why are they important? Here are five reasons:

1. There is no substitute for Christian relationships with students. With all the conferences a person can attend, with all the online information, daily email devotions and Facebook interactions, students in this day and age still need the good old fashioned opportunity to stop by the youth pastor’s office at the church. They still need to be able to meet in the home of their small group leader for weekly Bible study and friendships. The Kingdom of God is huge, but each local community makes it that way. Students can experience Jesus in many different settings, but can only be discipled face to face.

2. Students need you to point them to Christ. Your life and service are a witness to the faithfulness of Christ. Why is it important for leaders to have relationships with the students? Because Christ wants to have a relationship with the students. In your relationship with teenagers, you model Christ’s consistency and point them to Jesus.

3. The domino effect begins to happen. When leaders love the Lord with all their hearts, minds, and souls and their neighbors as themselves, students then experience the love of God. They, in turn, begin to love the Lord with all their hearts, minds and souls and their friends as themselves. Then that friend experiences that love and begins to love the Lord with all his or her heart, mind and soul and begins to… Being the salt and light in the world isn’t just a phrase, it’s an experience and a lifestyle. Live it out!

4. The message is more clear and more believable. I’m always skeptical if I get a call from someone, out of the blue, asking me to give something, do something, or buy something. If I know that person, however, I have a different mindset about it. If I have a relationship with the person, I find that I really want to know what they are calling about. When we share Christ with students (with whom we share a relationship), the message is clearer for them- both in words and actions.

5. Relationships open doors. If you have a relationship with a student, it opens doors to conversations, connections and change. If you don’t have a relationship with a student, the odds of those three things happening decrease dramatically. Doors are also open to friendships through the students you know. And doors are open in the way students see Christ’s love modeled. If you are able to lovingly care for and pursue a student who has gone down the wrong path, then Christ’s love is modeled to them. By keeping doors open, you can be ready (when students ask) to give a reason for the hope you have found.

I have been in countless settings where I have seen the relationship with students matter. If I had to give one piece of advice to a youth pastor of any age I would say, “Don’t focus on “relationships,” focus on people.” The relationships will take care of themselves. Though the nuts and bolts of learning about relationships are important, God’s heart is about people. Sometimes we get caught up in being a great leader, a great relationship builder, and other things as well. Learn those and learn them well, but don’t mistake the goal. The goal isn’t to become great at relationships, the goal is to love the students God has given you to serve.

[Video] Building a High Performance Team - 1st Youth Pastor Church

Nate Dame — Tue, 26 Feb 2013 12:30:00 +0000

The first Youth Pastor Church was a blast! In typical youth ministry style, there were a few humorous technical challenges... But we still managed to have a good time.

Jimn Kyles shared some great thoughts on building high performance teams. Watch the full recording below, and be sure to join us next time!

Scheduling Your Spouse

Rick Hutton — Fri, 22 Feb 2013 15:37:08 +0000

“Let’s be honest, you’re going to sacrifice your family for the ministry anyway.” Said in an almost secretive tone, these words were spoken to me by a single friend and fellow youth pastor. I too was single but I remember feeling my anger rise as he said this to me. I thought that what he was saying was off base and most certainly did not reflect the way that God would call people to live their lives in any career, but especially in ministry.

Now as a married youth pastor I have to acknowledge that though I completely disagreed with my friend, I actually have sacrificed my family for the sake of the student ministry and most of the time I didn’t even realize that I was sacrificing them on the altar of “successful ministry.”

In our culture it is quite easy to find ourselves making this sacrifice. With email, smart phones, texting and all of the social media out there it’s easy for us to get wrapped up in a crisis with a parent or student that takes us away from our families even when we’re in the same room! Then there’s the fact that students don’t keep the same kind of schedule that other people do and so a text at 11:30 pm seems perfectly normal to them even when it’s something as simple as saying “hi.”

We make this sacrifice because we love Jesus, we love students and we want to see students come into a powerful, saving, life-transforming relationship with the Lord of the Universe. It’s a noble desire and a high calling, but it is not a call to sacrifice our spouses and our families for the sake of the students in our churches. As we think about this, it’s helpful to remember a few things. First, it’s the Holy Spirit who will and does bring students to faith in Christ, not us. Second, Jesus is the only person that we’re called to sacrifice everything else for, not our ministries or our students. Third, and finally, we’re told in Genesis 2:24 that “a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” We’re meant to be united to our spouse as one flesh and with our spouse alone. There is nothing and no one else in this world that we are to be connected with in this way and therefore our relationship with our spouses must be placed above all other things except for our relationship with God.

But in our world, how can we do this? Mark DeVries, the Associate Pastor for Youth and their Families at First Presbyterian Church in Nashville, TN and President of Ministry Architects (www.ymarchitects.com) gives us some helpful advice by something he calls (admittedly unromantic) Rhythmic Week. You must be deliberate in making this rhythm work, and when you do, you will find time with your spouse increasing and your relationship growing, but it does take effort.

So how does this work? Divide each day into three sections, Morning, Afternoon, and Evening with each section being roughly four hours. This gives you 21 sections per week. We then break down those 21 sections into different categories. Here’s how they break down.

Rhythmic Week: 21 (4 hour) chunks of time

6 Sections - "Time-off"

“Time-off” That means no church phone calls, texts, emails, lesson prep, etc. Just a time to unplug from your daily work and be available to God and to your spouse. Of those six times, three must be designated as Sabbath and taken all in one day (for me, that’s Thursday). During that Sabbath day you can and should find time to be with your spouse even if it means that you schedule it far ahead of time.

5 Sections: Flex Time

Five of the remaining 15 sections should be designated as “flex time” which can be scheduled for regular monthly committee meetings, meetings with students or any other times where you might find yourself working; these are not events that occur on a weekly basis. On the weeks when you don’t have something work related going on during “flex time,” schedule a time out with your spouse, go for a walk, do something to make your spouse feel like you care for them and want to spend time with them.

10 Sections: Work Only

This leaves you with 10 remaining blocks in your week that you can schedule for programming, lesson prep, meetings, study time or whatever you need to do in your calling to minister to students to the best of your God-given ability. Working this schedule will hopefully bring balance to your work and to your life with your spouse and will also hopefully bring you to a place of being better at both.

While scheduling your spouse may not sound like the most romantic thing to do, we can see it in the same way that we schedule our time with God, spending time with Him each day. Just as we grow in our relationship with Jesus through our scheduled time we too can grow in our relationship with our spouses by scheduling time to be with them.

May God bless all of us who are married in ministry and help us balance out the time in our lives!

Happy or Holy?

Called to Youth Ministry — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 16:23:10 +0000

*This is a post written by Tim Price of Harvest Ministry. As we continue to look at how to build up your marriage we really like what Tim has to say. so we decided to pass it on to you. You can read more of his stuff /www.harvestministryteams.com/blog*

I remember reading a book a long time ago and though I don’t remember the official title, this tagline has always stuck with me: What if marriage wasn’t meant to make you happy, but to make you holy? The concept runs across my mind each time I have the blessing of being corrected or shaped in life by my wife.

It is true, however, that the marriage relationship is one model of our relationship with God. The way we love and interact with our spouse is typically an indicator of where our souls are with our Father.

Because of this important aspect, our relationship with our spouse, above all other earthly relationships needs to be cultivated, cared for, nurtured and cherished. The marriage relationship is tied to our spiritual lives because we are called to love our spouses as Christ loved the church. It involves sacrifice. It also involves a decision. It also involves daily commitment.

To get deep for a moment – have you ever thought about that fact that your spouse is you? This mystical aspect to marriage in scripture is that “the two become one.” You literally are joined together, heart and soul. But, your spouse is also your neighbor. The person you married and live with also falls in the category of the great commandment, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength and love your neighbor as yourself.”

It’s no wonder that next to our relationship with God, the marriage relationship is so holy and important. I guess you could say it’s one of the most important on earth because it reflects so much of our eternal relationship with God.

Here are some practical thoughts for helping to make the relationship with your spouse a holy, God reflection:

Jump over to Tim's Blog to read the rest....HERE

Why Youth Need to See Your Marriage

leneita@blueskygreensky.com — Tue, 12 Feb 2013 14:00:00 +0000

As I peered through my veil, my husband-to-be was beaming from ear to ear. I know it’s a cliché but it really seems like yesterday we stood before God, friends and family on our wedding day. From this point forward, we would be one. Standing at the altar I thought I could never love anyone more than I did at that moment. I was so wrong. No one told me that your love grows deeper, stronger, and richer from that point on. At the same time, no one told me just how hard marriage truly is. The old adage that declares, “This is not a sprint; it’s a marathon,” is more than true.

More and more, our youth know about the harshness of marriage instead of the joys. According to the American Psychological Association between 40% and 50% of youth will witness a divorce in their lifetime. Another 50% of that statistic will witness a second one. 1 Did you know that almost 41 percent of children have parents who have never been married?2

It’s no wonder that our students are struggling to know what a marriage should look like.

Recently, I met a young mother who was finishing up her senior year in high school. When I asked if the father of her 8 month old was in the picture, she told me that, sadly, he was in jail. “It’s alright,” she declared, “I want the world to know that I can do it all without a man. We don’t need him anyway.” In today’s world, the home is not always a good representation of what a true union is. The media portrays that marriage is expendable and unnecessary for a successful life. Whether we like it or not, our students are watching us and want to know if we will become the example they are looking for. This means we must take the time to do whatever it takes to train hard, stop for rests and keep going in this race of marriage. All the while our students need to see a Christ-centered marriage in action. Why? They learn three vital lessons:

1. Servanthood: My husband is the most amazing servant I know, and he starts his serving with me. However, it doesn’t stop there. My job is to serve him as well. Students see true servanthood when they see it start with a spouse. It is much easier to take each other for granted, and to ask our spouse to be on the back burner while life takes over. Instead when our youth see two people equally serving each other when they don’t “have” to, it is an amazing picture of the body of Christ at work.

2. Selflessness: When I first got married I thought I needed to learn the word “compromise.” I envisioned us walking onto a bridge and meeting in the middle. Instead, I quickly learned a valuable lesson. A good marriage means that I am walking all the way to my spouse, while at the same time he is walking all the way to me. I never realized how much I cared about ME until I got married. It was MY time, space and money. Everything was MINE. Then I learned that dying to self means just that: MY and MINE and ME die. If earthly marriage is to be a dim reflection of our relationship with Christ, then our students need to see what this looks like in a tangible way.

3. Sacrificial love: If I asked my students to tell me the elements of a healthy marriage, I don’t know if they could answer that question. You see, only ONE of the students in the ministry I serve is living with both of his/her biological parents. Many of them are in blended families with step-parents that they dislike. The others are in single parent homes, with moms who have never married at all. Words like “trust” and “safety” would elude them. Love, real love, that bonds a marriage together, comes from a foundation in the Lord. This is a love that will lead us to do anything for another. When students see the vulnerability that comes with this type of love, they can start to comprehend how much broader Christ’s love must be.

The goal is not for our youth to see perfection. Instead, a healthy marriage is a little bit messy. I don’t always want to serve, sacrifice and be selfless and neither does my husband. Instead, it is in our imperfections that we become the best role models. When youth can see that the point is to push through when we don’t want to, with Jesus at the center, they realize that our love grows more solid by the day. This is what a true relationship with our living God looks like, isn’t it? It’s the relationship that can’t be severed.

1(Furstenberg, F.F., Nord, C.W., Peterson, J.L., and Zill, N. (1983). "The Life Course of Children of Divorce." American Sociological Review 48(5): 656-668.)

2 Centers for Disease Control, National Center for Health Statistics, National Vital Statistics Report, “Births: Preliminary Data for 2010,” November 17, 2011, Table 7, at http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr60/nvsr60_02.pdf.

Your Spouse Comes Second

JonGreenhill — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 14:00:00 +0000

“I feel like you love your job more than you love me.” These are the words that my wife of two years said to me frustratingly. It was in the middle of an on and off argument that would last for weeks. It was the lowest point in my marriage and it was a time that I had to step back and rethink my calling as a youth pastor.

I was in my first full time youth ministry position and I had really hit my stride. I was building relationships with students. I was learning how to teach the word of God. I was doing God’s work. But I was missing something huge. I wasn’t building my relationship with my wife. I was letting my marriage fall by the wayside as I jumped into ministry full steam.

I think that a lot of youth workers fall victim to this. It’s so easy for us to get caught up in the fact that we are working for God and doing good in the world that we begin to neglect our spouses. It’s not intentional. It’s not something that we aim to do. It’s subtle. It’s a way for Satan to use something good to destroy our lives. And every youth worker who is married has the potential to be caught by it.

Throughout my weeks long discussion with my wife, I had to come to grips with a few things.

1. I made a vow to my wife first. When I stood in the front of the church I made a vow before God to love and take care of my wife no matter what else happened in life. We talk about “in good times and in bad. In sickness and in health.” But we rarely think, “I’ll love my spouse even when I’m doing God’s work and my schedule gets crazy because I was dumb enough to schedule an overnighter the week before a retreat the week before a carwash and don’t forget that it’s a holiday weekend which means that I get to preach!” I made a vow to love my wife no matter what happens in life. EVEN IN MINISTRY!

2. I drastically needed to re-evaluate my time. I was always taught about boundaries when I was an intern and an interim youth pastor. But in the midst of ministry, my time started to blur together. I was working from one event to the next and building relationships in between. I wasn’t watching my calendar to know how much time I was spending at church. I wasn’t paying attention to how much time I was spending with my wife. I needed to sit down and look at my calendar and make some changes.

3. I needed to re-prioritize my life. Ministry had become number one in my life. I needed to change that. After ministry my relationship with God came second (there’s a whole different discussion there). My wife was a distant third. As youth workers we need to get this order correct. In our lives, our relationship with God is always first. ALWAYS. But right after that is our relationship with our spouse. Your spouse should come second in your life only behind God.

Ephesians 5:25 says that as a husband, I should love my wife as Christ loves the church. It doesn’t say that I should love my students like Christ loved the church. Or I shouldn’t love meetings like Christ loved the church (okay, bad example). It says that I should love my wife as Christ loved the church, who he gave His life up for. I can’t do this if ministry comes first. I can’t do this unless my relationship with God comes first. I can’t do this unless my spouse comes second.

Do you need to make yourr spouse second in your life?

How to Write a Worship Song (In 5 Minutes or Less)

Nate Dame — Wed, 06 Feb 2013 12:23:00 +0000

Hmm, good advice?

The Ministry Marathon

BrianLucas — Thu, 31 Jan 2013 17:18:45 +0000

“We won!”
These were the dying words of Pheidippides. According to legend, when the Greeks defeated the Persians at Marathon, Pheidippides was sent to Athens to relay the good news. Immediately after fighting in the battle, he was sent as a messenger of the news. He ran the entire 25+ miles without stopping, only to declare, “We won!” with his dying breath. [1]
The combination of a hard-fought battle and a 25 mile sprint proved too much for the man, and his life gave out under the effort. The news was important, and timing crucial, but he lost his life to deliver it. At what point does the consequence outweigh importance of the task? Would the news still be valid if the man had taken a little more time for the sake of his health? Probably. But I’m sure he saw the need for the news to be delivered. He was willing to sacrifice his own well-being to get the job done, even if it meant running until his heart actually stopped.

My own personal marathon
I can relate to this in a small way. In fact, as I write this I realize I have just finished my tenth day in a row of working in some form or other. I’ve worked right through both my days off. I always find one more thing that should have been finished, or something else I could get started on; another emergency problem that I have to attend to “right now”. Even though I know better, I keep pushing through and working. As if somehow working myself to death is preferable to taking a break.

It’s like weight lifting. I played football in highschool, and I was scrawny when I started. I wanted to bulk up to match up to the other players, and so my first inclination was to work out as much and as often as possible. But the coaches taught me an important truth, even though it’s a little counter-intuitive: resting makes you stronger. You see, when you work out a muscle, the tissue breaks down a little bit. If you work it hard the next day as well, the tissue continues to break down. Keep working it everyday, and you’ll end up destroying the muscle. But, if you work hard one day, then give that muscle a break for a day or two, it will rebuild and become stronger, allowing you to lift more the next time. It’s almost like God designed us to need breaks even at the most basic levels.

More than a suggestion
When God delivered the Ten Commandments to Moses, the title of “Commandments” wasn’t arbitrary. These are ten foundational rules for living. These are crucial mandates for righteousness and even decency. Don’t kill. Don’t steal. There is only one God. Don’t hate people because their stuff is better than yours. Take breaks . . . what? Yep, that’s there, too. Good ol’ number four:

Remember that the Sabbath Day belongs to me. You have six days when you can do your work, but the seventh day of each week belongs to me, your God. No one is to work on that day—not you, your children, your slaves, your animals, or the foreigners who live in your towns.

- Exodus 20:8-10 (CEV)

There are meant to only be six days of work. Not seven. Not ten. Not 100. You are supposed to take a FULL DAY off. Together, as a family. The Israelites took this seriously. I mean, look at all the grief they gave Jesus over the Sabbath. They had rules about rules and following those rules just to keep people from possibly breaking the Law of the Sabbath.

Sadly, many of us have lost our zeal for this commandment. We can all agree that we shouldn’t kill or steal. Most pastors would have no problem preaching on coveting, honoring your parents, and idolatry. But rare is the sermon on Sabbath. Rarer still is the church culture that adheres to a Sabbath among the staff. I’ve heard of pastors that expect their staff to work in the office Monday through Saturday, and then show up for duty on Sunday and call that their day off while they serve in the services. This is not what it should be!
God said no one is to work on that day. NO ONE. That includes pastors. That includes you and me.

Bad pictures
When you work on the Sabbath (when you fail to take a day off each week), you aren’t just working a little too hard. You are being a bad photograph. We are made in the image of God, but we’re not portraying a good likeness of our Creator when we fail to act as He does, and that includes taking a break every seven days. Even worse, when we neglect the Sabbath, we are breaking one of the Ten Commandments. And you can’t explain your way out of ignoring one of the “Big Ten”. We’ve got to be better at living like Jesus.

I get how hard it is to take breaks. Day off? Are you kidding? I’m a youth worker who is currently also serving as the Communications Director at my church, while I run a freelance graphic design business on the side. I have a wife with whom I am trying maintain a quality marriage, twin toddlers that are a pair of adorable handfuls, and we just bought a house. My “honey-do” list is only a foot or two short of a marathon itself. I know how hard it is to really take time off; how easily “just one quick thing” turns into an entire afternoon or day of extra work. Where could I, or you, possibly find space for an entire day off?
How to get some rest

Due to the hectic nature of our society, a day off might seem impossible. But try these three things:

1. SCHEDULE IT - I know that I have to set reminders and appointments for just about everything, and it’s never more true than with resting. Schedule your day off. It doesn’t have to be Sunday, and shouldn’t be if you’re working Sundays at church. Pick a day that will work with your schedule. I shoot for Fridays, knowing that Saturday generally gets taken up with youth events and Sunday is always church. Monday is a popular one, too, but I like to get going right after the weekend and get my break before the Big Day.

2. BE UNAVAILABLE - Once you’ve scheduled your Sabbath day, make yourself unavailable. Tell your boss, your church, and anyone else who will give you work that you are available before and after, but NOT ON THIS DAY. Turn off your phone. Don’t check your email. Spend time with your family, or a friend or two who won’t bring up work.

3. SPEND TIME WITH GOD - Part of “resting” includes the rejuvenation of your soul. Read your Bible, casually. It’s easy to get in a rut of only reading to prepare your messages each week. Pull out a devotional or reading plan and just read without any purpose other than getting close to your Father. Use part of this day to try some of the other spiritual disciplines, like solitude, meditation (the Christian kind that King David did, not eastern-style), prayer, or that one you read in that book that time and never got around to...

Don’t forget to give yourself grace with this. In the words of Jesus, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.” (Mark 2:27 NIV)

Digging into God

Jody McPhearson — Mon, 28 Jan 2013 18:00:00 +0000

As a youth pastor, why is digging into God’s word essential? Why is it important to have a relationship with God?

What is a youth pastor? If pastor is called to serve, then he/she is a servant. So, a youth pastor is a pastor is called to serve youth, right? Well, if that is true, and a youth pastor does not have a relationship with God, then who is he really serving? Himself/herself?

I know that as youth pastors, we get busy. I mean BUSY! There is program planning, curriculum building, volunteer recruitment, announcements, events, visits, marketing, social media, trying to be relevant, and on, and on, and on! Is it possible that we get too busy for God? Think about that for a second. We get too busy to read the words of the One who originally called us to speak for Him! How can you speak for somebody if you don’t know what His word says?

Let me say this. I was born to be a public speaker! I am great at it! That is a God given talent! There are MANY public speakers who are better than me! (Not many are more talented!) I say that to say this: before I truly devoted myself to the subject matters of my speeches, they were still pretty good. That’s because I am great at improvisation and I can adapt very quickly. To my chagrin, God is not always a fan of improv! When I am delivering His word, improv turns His words into my words. That’s not what He called me to do.

In sports, we have all seen, known, heard of, or been the athlete that was physically gifted, but was not the best on the team. The athlete that was the most successful was the one that worked the hardest. The athlete that was the most successful was the one with the most heart! I use this example because I know that we can all relate to it. I also use it because that is what I am talking about here. Heart.

If your heart is to do God’s will and to give God glory, then you ought to spend time with Him and know His heart. It is important to take an honest spiritual assessment of the condition of your heart. Are we like David, son of Jesse, a man after God’s own heart? (Acts 13:22) Are we willing as youth pastors to do everything He wants us to do?

God wants us to have a relationship with Him. He desires us to be after His heart. Jeremiah 3:15 says it this way:

And I will give you pastors according to mine heart, which shall feed you with knowledge and understanding.

If a youth pastor doesn’t dig into God’s word, then this is an EPIC FAIL!

So, as a youth pastor you must ask yourself the following question:
Do you have a heart after God’s own heart? In what ways does your heart need to be transformed so as to be more like God’s heart? How can digging into God’s word change that?

Tips for digging into God’s word.

Find a quiet time and place to read God’s word.
Pray before you start reading
Be purposeful in your reading (have a plan of what you’ll read).
Create a journal devoted to your time digging in God’s word.
Listen to what God is saying through His word.

Truly listening to God through His word can be tough. It takes effort to empty yourself of thoughts and feelings and open your heart to truly hear what is being said. It’s about consciously and actively taking in a message and then responding to that very same message. If we can do that, God can transform our lives.

When Prayer Becomes Active

Jeremy Lokey — Thu, 24 Jan 2013 15:37:36 +0000

I once paid $10 to watch a vegetarian eat a piece of pork fat. My first full-time ministry job was working with another guy who trained and ran triathlons so he didn’t eat meat while he was training.

We developed a sophisticated “game” where if you bet the other guy $10 that they wouldn’t do something, the other guy would HAVE to do it or face the shame and ridicule of the other. It wasn’t really about the money, and it ended up being a $10 bill that we traded back and forth for what are now indelible memories of one-ups-man-ship and mild embarrassment.

Needless to say, it became a unique and significant part of our relationship through the years.

Unfortunately, I tend to look at my prayer life much in the same way as the “$10 bet.” It’s something unique to my relationship with God that comes up occasionally and is mostly done to receive a desired effect. Even then, it's not essential to my relationship with God, just something that's added on every now and then.

PRAYER PROVES FAITH
It wasn’t until I started looking at how my prayer to God is linked to my faith in God (and His Word) that things really started changing with my prayer life. It came in a realization that my prayer PROVES my faith. I had to let that sink in a little. Saying that I believe that God answers prayer takes faith in Him. When I pray I’m ACTING on that faith by seeking, waiting, and listening for an answer.

 THE PRACTICE OF PRAYER
It’s hard to put that in practice, even in student ministry, because prayer seems so passive. It seems to be just words, feelings, thoughts directed at an unseen God who knows everything we’re saying, feeling, and thinking anyway.

Consider Abraham waiting on the promises of God to be fulfilled in his life. God first revealed His plan to Abram when Abram was 75 years old. It wasn’t until 25 years later that God’s promise of an heir was fulfilled in the way God intended. Yet we see in Genesis 15:6 that years before the promise is fulfilled, “Abram believed the Lord, and he credited it to him as righteousness.” How did Abram’s faith result in righteousness? The answer is simple... ABRAM MOVED! He took God’s promises as truth and walked in obedience until those promises were fulfilled (not without a few missteps along the way).

This is the same thing that must happen in our own lives. Our prayer life proves our faith in God and once that faith turns to action, we experience the life God desires us to have...a life of full dependence on Him for direction and provision. It’s the kind of life that can only be found through prayerfully seeking His Word and listening to His voice each and every day. No $10 required.

The Most Important Relationship You Have

JonGreenhill — Thu, 17 Jan 2013 19:26:45 +0000

“It’s all about relationships.” These are the words that my youth pastor said to me soon after I began my first paid job in youth ministry. I was a 20 year old youth intern and I was ready to change the world. Little did I know that these words would transform how I did ministry.

As I entered the world of being on a church staff, I would soon learn that I would need to develop relationships at every level. First with the students. Then there were the parents. Then the older adults in the church. Don’t forget the deacon board and elders. And the custodian. I needed a strong relationship with the custodian. There’s also the pastor and other staff. I can’t forget about them. These were all relationships that I needed to foster and grow if I wanted to survive life in a church.

I learned these things as I went, but I was forgetting about one crucial relationship. The relationship between God and me. As I built relationships with students and parents, I neglected the relationship with my creator.

In my discussion with other youth pastors and youth workers, I realized quickly that I’m not alone in this. This is a struggle that plagues youth pastors of all ages. From the twenty year old intern to the twenty year veteran, we often get caught up in the “to-do’s” of ministry and neglect the single relationship that matters the most. This leads to a quick burnout in ministry. After all, you can’t pour out what you don’t have.

Let me share an example with you. The other day I was watching Curious George with my kids. It was the episode where George learns how water wells work. Now, why a monkey needs to know this, I still can’t comprehend. But George learns that in order to get water to flow from the pump, it needs to be connected to a greater source of water. If the source of water dries up, there is nothing left to come out of the pump.

Think about that for a minute. In our relationships with the students that we minister to, we pour out what we have. If we aren’t connected to a deep enough source, we will run dry and have nothing to offer our students.

I love how Jesus brings this illustration to life in John 4. Jesus interacts with the woman at the well who is coming to draw water. After a brief exchange the following happens:

Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”
“Sir,” the woman said, “you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his livestock?”
Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (verses 10-14)

Jesus shows this woman that He is spring of living water. He is a spring of water that is never ending. His well will never run dry. It will never cease. As long as we stay connected to God’s well, we will always be filled. That is a huge truth.

As we spend the next couple of months looking at relationships, we need to acknowledge one thing. We need to acknowledge that our relationship with God is the MOST ESSENTIAL relationship. Over the next few weeks, CTYM will feature articles from youth pastors who are in the trenches. The aim of these articles is to give you practical ideas for staying connected to the unending well.

But we also need something from you.

1. Check back regularly for new articles.
2. Contribute by commenting and sharing how you stay close to God.
3. Share these things with other youth pastors that you know.

Our goal is to start creating a community of help and encouragement for each other. Join in and take part!

New Year...Again

groveyp — Tue, 15 Jan 2013 18:00:00 +0000

Every year it is the same story., the “ooohhh’s” and the “aaaawwwweeee’s” ring through the crowd as the ball is lifted up high into the sky at Time Square. The music thumps away late into the night in down-towns across the nation with glasses clinking, indistinct conversations and laughter barely buzzing above the music. And then, depending on if you have kids sleeping in the house, we shout or we whisper the countdown to the New Year. And then, if we are blessed, we kiss the one we love and we smile.
Why the hoopla about a new year? When did celebrating the New Year become such an important part of our society? I don’t know the answer to that, and I can’t speak for everyone; but I can speak for myself. The new year is such a profound time of celebration because in one night we remember the highlights (be them high or low) from the previous year and for a moment we can imagine that the new year will bring new hope, new opportunity, new things that will be better than the year before. As we plunge into 2013, I imagine that there are a lot of people who hope that this year will be much better than the year before, so the New Year’s celebration must have been bigger than ever before because there is so much more need for hope.
At Called to Youth Ministry, we are concerned about relationships. We have found a niche that we find particularly interesting and we get feedback that you do to. We believe in small group coaching and training because we are fascinated with the power of a small group of like-minded people; it is an experience like few others. When trying to tell others about the experience I usually have the end the conversation with, “you just have to see it for yourself.”
With that in mind we have chosen to focus on relationships in all of our writing, articles, resources and communications for the next 3 months at least.
It is the time of year that we look into 2013 with hope and expectation for something new. And here it is: something new. We offer a fresh look on relationships; relationship with God, with your family, and with ministry partners. If you’re wondering where the “sell” is, there isn’t one. But if you can’t see the power of relationships now, you will at the end of this series!
I can’t wait to read the articles from the talented writers we have. I can’t wait to see the resources that come from this series for pastors and ministry. I can’t wait to hear the testimonies from youth leaders just like me who grow in relationships, and what God does with that.
If you are feeling tired or worn down, there is probably a gap in the relationships in your life; we want to see those relationships healed and restored and we want to see you with fresh passion and vision for the new year. If you are wondering what is going to happen this year and you’re feeling disillusioned with your life- we want God to reconstruct your illusions based on faith and based on His purposes, and we want to see you on fire for God and His passion for people.
We often can’t remember an influential sermon from last week let alone from years ago, but remembering who influenced us is often easy. Who is the most influential person in your life, and why?

The END of Controversy

JonGreenhill — Fri, 21 Dec 2012 14:57:00 +0000

(written 12/13/12)

As I sit in this coffee shop, slowly sipping on my hot chocolate, there is Christmas music playing in the background and the sun is setting behind the trees in the distance. This is the pinnacle of peace. If I could escape here forever, I just might consider it.

But the truth is that outside of these walls, peace is far from everyone’s mind. The nation is coming to terms with a horrible and senseless shooting at an elementary school in Connecticut. The world is trying to make sense of the tragic loss of life. Parents are mourning with the families of those who have lost their lives. They are also holding their own children a little bit closer.

It is in this context that I sat down to write about controversy. To be more specific, I sat down to write about the end of controversy. Over the last two weeks we’ve discussed what happens when there is a controversy to hit the church. How do people respond? How do we, as Christians, act?

But today the idea of controversy takes a different look. A quick pass through Facebook and Twitter already shows arguments popping up about gun control. "WE SHOULD HAVE MORE LAWS!" "DON’T TAKE MY 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHT!" is what I see.

Hours into a national tragedy it seems silly to have these arguments, yet here we are. By the time that this article is published, the initial shock will have begun to fade and this topic will have begun to dominate the discussion.

More talk, more arguments, more controversy. It doesn’t matter which side you stand on, you have to admit that there seems to be an increasing number of controversial subjects. Abortion. Homosexuality. Gun control. The list could go on and on.

As I was thinking about how to approach an article on the end of controversy, I realized something. There will never be an end to controversy. As soon as one topic fades away, another comes along to take its place. This will happen until the end of time. It’s in our fallen nature to argue and disagree.

I was thinking through these things and a Bible verse entered my mind. It reads:
He who testifies to these things says, “Yes, I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus. Revelation 22:20

It hit me like a ton of bricks. There will be a time when controversy ends. It will be the end of arguments. It will be the end of pain. It will be the end of evil. As I sat in my peaceful coffee shop and tried to process the horror of the day, the peace of the Lord came over me. There will be an end to all of this. There will be a day when Christians won’t fight each other on topics. There will be a day when all of the pain of this life will fade away and we will be caught up in the joy of knowing God completely. It is the day of Jesus’ coming.

Reflecting on this verse today has found me in my tranquil coffee shop whispering to myself,

“Amen, Come, Lord Jesus.”

Responding to a Controversal Culture

Blake Appleby — Thu, 20 Dec 2012 18:48:00 +0000

We live in a culture that is no stranger to controversy. From the political ads to the religious fads, controversy is everywhere. But, what are we really doing about it? Our methods of handling these matters tend to stir up more problems, rather than provide solutions.

Doesn’t it seem that our culture is apt to promote and platform contentious matters, such as abortion or gay marriage? We attempt to see how close we can get to the line, or how far we can push the limits. We see it. We hear it. Some are right in the middle of it. So, how should we handle it? How should we respond to a culture that promotes controversy?

What Should We Do:
1. We must trust in the Word of God.
2. We must acknowledge the fact that we’re held accountable before God.
3. We must carefully and courageously address the situations that arise.

What Should We Not Do:
1. We must not address anything we aren’t capable of backing up.
2. We must not voice our opinions if our motives are impure.
3. We must not stir the fire, but allow God to use our lives to stir the hearts of those who need Him.

In conclusion, controversial issues are messy. We must be willing to show this world the love of Jesus Christ. Let’s be His hands and feet in the midst of controversy and chaos.

About Blake Appleby:
Blake Appleby is the student pastor at First Baptist Church in Umatilla, Florida. He is an unapologetic gospel communicator with a passion to reach students where they are. Blake and his wife, Meredith, enjoy empowering students to make much of Jesus. He loves his marriage, coffee, and traveling. You can connect with him personally at bappleby@fbcumatilla.org.

Will We Ever See the Acts 2 Church Again?

Jay Higham — Tue, 18 Dec 2012 21:00:00 +0000

I am almost one year into a brand new church plant in Western Pennsylvania. When I say brand new, I mean brand new. From the ground up, this is a new church. No denominational backing. We're not a sister plant started by a larger church. We are simple a group of people who felt God calling us to do something different in the communities in which we live.

As we got our start, we spent significant time in the early chapters of Acts, studying the birth of the Christian church. We sensed an overwhelming pull to model what we saw and learned. Now this isn't anything new. Many churches start out with the same intent, to be an "Acts 2 Church." But as we get ready to celebrate our first year as a church, I have becoming asking myself, Are we on the Acts 2 path?

What is the Acts 2 Church? Personally, I define an Acts 2 church to be a church who sees the basic principles church ministry and demonstrates them within the context of their corporate and personal ministries. The principles are simple. Share the gospel message of Jesus Christ. Teach the lessons that Jesus taught. Serve each other and the community in which you live. And Worship God with all that you are and do.

The early church lived out their faith in real and dramatic ways. New Christians sold their possessions and property and gave the proceeds to the church. Believers met regularly, not just for worship but to do life together. Whatever the need, the church met it. Whatever the challenge, the people of God came together to face it. Sacrifices were great, even leading some to their death, and yet, they refused to back down. It was an amazing time.

Now I don’t think for a second that they had it all figured out. Nor do I believe that they did things perfectly. Scripture gives evidence that they experienced trials and difficulties. Nonetheless, it was a unique time for the church and the believers who committed themselves to the movement.

As I look at the church today, I wonder if we will ever see the church that we read about in the book of Acts? Will we ever see the sacrifice and giving? Will we ever see the church respond to the needs of our neighbors and communities? Will we ever see believers put they faith as their first priority? Will we ever be so committed to the church as God’s family that we go out of our way to make sure we are building stronger communities? Will we ever stop living for the glory of self and begin living to glorify God? Or have we become too comfortable with church as we’ve made? I’m curious to know, Will we ever see the Acts 2 church ever again?

THINGS I DO IN YOUTH MINISTRY…Simply Youth Ministry Conference- a new favorite place for training and growth, the Simply Youth Ministry Conference is an amazing opportunity for youth pastors to connect, grow, and be challenged and renewed for the callings of their ministries. I also serve as a volunteer staffer who supports the conference team. This year I will be looking to connect with youth workers as I lead one of the Connecting Groups, formerly known as Affinity Groups.

Jay Higham,

Pastor

Jay Higham is the pastor at Harvest Church, in McMurray PA. Having served as a youth pastor for over 20 years, Jay now shares his ministry experience on his blog, jayhigham.wordpress.com, and on his website, www.jayhigham.com. He also writes the blog, Help! I'm A Teenager. a new online resource for students, and contributes to a handful of youth ministry blogs and websites. Along with being a husband and father of five, Jay writes children's books, designs t-shirts, and loves training up the next generation of youth workers.

Help Called to Youth Ministry Equip More Youth Pastors in 2013

Nate Dame — Tue, 18 Dec 2012 16:42:34 +0000

Hello youth ministry friends!

I have really enjoyed the series of "controversy" blogs recently posted by a nmber of contributers. That series will continue, but I felt it prudent to pause for a moment and share some fo the broader vision of Called to Youth Ministry.

As another year comes to a close, we look to next year and again wonder just what the Lord will do through this ministry. Even with the best laid plans, he has a way of working in unique ways – and we are happy to be along for the ride!

This year we again saw the ministry grow, especially through the work of Nathan Cornett as Ministry Director, and the wonderful support of our growing Ministry Team. We saw interest in the ministry expand as we made lots of new friends on Facebook, Twitter, and on the blog. And we were so encouraged to walk alongside some of those new friends as they experienced training and community in our online training groups.

Called to Youth Ministry's ongoing mission is to support and equip local youth pastors. With God's help, we aim to make a substantial impact in the lives of youth pastors, without busting their budget!

Online training is a great format to see that happen. Just watch this video from one training group to see it for yourself:

I'm writing this post today to especially ask for your prayers. We need the Lord's blessing and direction each and every day if we hope to make any difference!

I am also asking if you would prayerfully consider supporting this ministry financially.

If you are a barely-paid or never-paid youth pastor, please do not feel pressured to give what you donot have, and allow us to continue to serve you! However, if you are a youth ministry fan (parent, senior pastor, etc.), if you support other ministries, or if you are a part of a church that has a missions budget, would you consider the impact you could have by partnering with Called to Youth Ministry?

Your financial gift has a direct result in equipping youth pastors. Have you ever stopped to think about how many students’ lives just one youth pastor can impact?

In high school, I was deeply impacted by the life and teaching of my youth pastor, John Brooks. I can still picture one particular conversation we had in his car one day and how it resolved some serious doubts I was having about my faith. And John poured individually into dozens of students every single month, and taught many, many more.

When you give to Called to Youth Ministry, you help us equip youth pastors like John who in turn disciple many teens in their community. One youth pastor can pour into the lives of hundreds of students every year – even thousands! With God’s help, we are able to make a multiplied impact for Christ in communities across the country!

This ministry is blessed with very few overhead costs. Like many ministries, our greatest cost is supporting the staff that make day-to-day ministry possible.

As 2012 comes to a close, many families make end-of-year contributions to their church and various non-profits. May I encourage you to make a donation to Called to Youth Ministry so we can continue reaching more youth pastors? Those in youth ministry need your help – with tight budgets, little is left over to pay for the training they really need. Because of the wonderful support Called to Youth Ministry receives from friends and family like you, we have been able to serve youth pastors at little cost to them – and we need your ongoing support to continue to do so.

We have some ambitious goals for 2013. Please pray for Called to Youth Ministry, and if you would, pray about partnering with us financially to make 2013 the best year yet.

We thank God for your continued support and friendship! And Merry Christmas!

By God’s grace,
Nate Dame
Founder, Called to Youth Ministry

P.S. There are a number of ways to donate. I would love to chat if you have any questions about Called to Youth Ministry. You can reach me at nate@calledtoyouthministry.com or direct by phone, (312) 870-0056.

Lessons from the Election

KellySoif — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 14:00:00 +0000

I think all of us would agree that we are glad that this election has passed. I saw in the news that it is estimated that $6 billion was spent! That explains why I felt so exhausted by the barrage of negative TV commercials and flyers in my mailbox.

However, this is the first major election that I recall where the dialogue was just as ugly on social media. Sure, we had Facebook and Twitter in 2008, but they were not operating at the intense levels they are now. I am more bothered by the posts I saw from my Facebook “friends” than by anything I saw from the candidates!

Other than unsubscribing the worst offenders from your Facebook feed, what is a Christian to do? I take counsel from Paul’s wise words to Timothy in what most scholars consider his last epistle from jail, written nearly two thousands years ago.

In 2Timothy 2, especially starting in verse 14, here are some of Paul’s words that we can take to heart and apply in very real ways in 2012:

Stop fighting. Period. There is not much to add to Paul’s words in verse 14: “Remind everyone about these things, and command them in God’s presence to stop fighting over words. Such arguments are useless, and they can ruin those who hear them.” May we never put more emphasis on where we disagree than on what we have in common.

Never attack other people, regardless of how strongly you feel about a given topic. I cannot deny that some of the issues at stake in this election will have massive consequences on the world stage. Nevertheless, we are called as believers to be respectful and kind. Hear Paul’s counsel again from verses 16-17: “Avoid worthless, foolish talk that only leads to more godless behavior. This kind of talk spreads like cancer, as in the case of Hymenaeus and Philetus.”

Pray for God to change hearts. Rather than debate and argue and post yet another toxic article on your Facebook, listen to these words: “A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult people. Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth.” (verses 24-25).

Don’t get me wrong – I really cared about this election. In fact, I voted early through my absentee ballot. But at the end of the day, I want to live out these words that John Wesley frequently quoted from Augustine: “In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity.”

Kelly Soifer is the Director of Recruiting and Leadership Development for the Free Methodist Church in Southern California and is a 30-year youth ministry veteran with the church and Young Life. She has taught religious studies at the high school level, and currently teaches at Westmont College, where she trains students in church and parachurch internships. You can read her blog at kellysoifer.blogspot.com and follow her @kellysoif.

Demonstrating Christ Even Among Christians

John Powley — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 16:19:11 +0000

One of the biggest hindrances that people claim prevents them from becoming a believer is other Christians. They are quick to point to gossiping, backstabbing, and a general unwillingness to care about one another. Sadly, these claims are often true in regard to the most insignificant things.

Unfortunately, when hot button topics are broached, even among believers, the results can be un-Christian! Certainly, it helps to choose appropriate times and locations for these types of conversations such as:

• in person, rather than online
• among friends and respectful acquaintances rather than enemies
• at times when all participants are well-rested
• adequate time can be given to a discussion

Romans 12:10 tells us that we are to “Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another…” There are many topics on which good people passionately hold different viewpoints. The answers are never easy, and there is often deep pain on both sides of the issue.

The following are three things I have found that help me to respectfully engage others whose viewpoints differ from my own.

Ask for Understanding
I can never assume to know why a person holds a certain position. If someone holds a viewpoint for which I don’t agree, I gain insight by asking them to further clarify their position. Attacking their idea, or assigning motive, is a recipe for an unprofitable argument. Sometimes, the easiest way to gain understanding is to ask a person for the Biblical principles upon which they base their belief.

Analyze Opinions and Facts
As a human being it is possible a held belief could be wrong. In fact, what I consider to be true may not be supported by fact. When discussing hot button topics with others, one goal should be honoring one another. I can never assume that I am always right. Taking time to carefully consider the comments of others allows me to:

• increase my understanding about an issue
• better understand and explain my own position
• convey a sense of worth and value of the person with whom I am engaged in conversation

Agree to Disagree
There are some who instigate arguments only to appear superior to others. They feel those who do not agree with their conclusions must simply be wrong. While they do not hesitate to engage in any conversation, they usually prefer an online forum. Personally, when I see a discussion like this begin, I rarely add my comments because I know it will only add fuel to an unproductive fire. While a certain position may indeed be wrong, forcing someone to agree with you or belittling them publically never accomplishes anything. Instead, if both parties are willing, it may be more beneficial to agree upon a future time to continue the discussion.

As crazy as it may seem in the midst of such polarizing debates, when the principles of Romans 12:10 are followed Jesus Christ is glorified. As Christians, I think that is ultimately our greatest goal in everything we do.

John Powley and his wife, Amy are Local Church missionaries to the Mid-Atlantic with Word of Life Fellowship. They make their home in Harrisburg, PA. John and Amy have ministered together to children and youth for over 17 years. Their passion is helping churches evangelize and disciple young people by equipping leaders for personal and youth ministry effectiveness. Questions or comments about this article may be addressed to John at johnpowley@wol.org or by contacting him on twitter @johnpowleywol. His website is http://johnpowley.wol.org/.

How to Handle Controversial Debates as Believers

joshevans — Thu, 06 Dec 2012 16:19:32 +0000

Recently, many heated debates have come up in our society that has been very intriguing to me. Whether it be the close election that we just voted on, or the controversy of Chick Fil A and the issue of gay marriage, or the never ending debate of abortion. All of these controversial debates have brought up many questions in my mind, and how we should go about addressing these debates with believers and unbelievers.

We are called to stand in love- This is a difficult place to be as Christians, because many Christians feel that showing love and hearing the opposing party or belief out is a sign of weakness, and therefore not a sign of boldness for God. I disagree; it is more than possible to take a stand for what the Bible says about the issue of abortion, gay marriage, or any other controversial subject in love. I have felt that recently, some acts by Christians have not been out of love, but on the contrary, some of the opposing sides who have been screaming for tolerance and love have not been that loving and tolerant of our right to believe what we feel is right either. So, as Christians who possess the love of Jesus in us, we now must take that love and allow it to live right through and out of us into our controversial subjects with others. It is possible to love people while sharing your personal Biblical belief on an issue.
Politics and the church do not mix- I have seen politics and the church come together, and the end is never good. I have seen debates started that end in bitterness and frustration. It is best for you to address politics outside of the church
Preferences should not overtake Biblical truth- One thing that is extremely clear is that the Bible does not change. God and the Bible are the same yesterday, today, and forever. Therefore, because of this, I believe the Bible is very clear about certain controversial subjects that Christians should stand even vote for. It is your duty as not just an American, but as a Christian to vote for Biblical truth over the preferences that you may have.
Use controversial debates to better sharpen you in your beliefs- I enjoy debating and discussing subjects like this. I allow controversial debates with believers and unbelievers as an opportunity to sharpen my skills in personally knowing what I believe.

I hope that this post has encouraged you to love others, and use controversial subjects as an opportunity for you to make Jesus name known in all of the earth!

Question: How have you addressed these controversial subjects in your life?

Behind the Church Controversy

groveyp — Wed, 05 Dec 2012 13:30:00 +0000

"From the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and violent men take it by force."

We have all been a part of a group of people who just show up. Either it's at school, or work, or even church; but we have all seen it. You know... "It". It's the smile, the nod, the wink, the shrug... "It" is simply saying, "I'm fine" when asked about your week. It is the ignoring of the deeper things to preserve the harmony of wherever we are. It happens in families, it happens among friends, and it happens far too often in churches all across America.

But why?

Maybe it's a fear that we will rock the boat, or maybe we don't like that uncomfortable feeling we get when you are not sure of the outcomes, or when things are unplanned. But for whatever reason, NO ONE LIKES CONTROVERSY.

Hot topics have a way of making hot heads, but if we cannot discuss difficult issues in the church, where can we discuss them? On Facebook? It seems like these days, all the hot button issues have been relegated to a few words in a status update or a tweet! I think we can do better than that.

After a major controversy that Jesus stirred up, many people who were following Him left. They just stopped following His teaching because they said it was simply "too hard". The controversy left those Jesus was teaching feeling uncomfortable and many left His teaching. When Jesus saw this He asked the disciples closest to Him if they were going to leave too. They simply replied, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life" (John 6:68). But that begs the question: do we truly believe that Jesus has the words of eternal life? Do we truly believe that what Jesus says about a subject is true and right, even if it is uncomfortable and many good people disagree?

It is my view that we have lost both the art (and skill) of debate, as well as the emotional ability to deal with opposing viewpoints in a logical sequence of discussion. We (as a culture) have taken the course followed by many in history to reduce life to the lowest common denominator and to become cultural thermometers that reflect what is going on around us, rather than faithful men and women who know and believe in the words of life spoken by Jesus. We have allowed ourselves to be taken in by the cultural viewpoint that tells us that other's opinions and views are just as acceptable as our own WITHOUT scrutiny.

I am NOT saying that people should or shouldn't be allowed to have opinions, or that we need to all agree in our opinions. That is not what I am saying at all, in fact I think the diversity of ideology, views, and philosophies are not only what make us interesting, but also what spur us on to grow and learn! What I AM saying is that ideas and philosophies and ideologies need to be discussed, debated, and reviewed. Principles of logic SHOULD be applied. The ideology of the Word of God should be applied.

In the next two weeks, we will be releasing a series of controversial blogs by a variety of guest bloggers that we believe NEED to be discussed. You may not agree with their view points, and we WANT TO HEAR WHY. Called to Youth Ministry is excited to launch this new series of blogs and we hope that you will engage the controversy, discuss, and THINK with us through these issues. Start looking for these BLOGS soon!

Tribe TV with Dr. Andrew (Andy) Root: Relational Youth Ministry

groveyp — Mon, 19 Nov 2012 21:58:55 +0000

Today's hangout with Dr. Andrew Root was outstanding. He addressed the issue of relational student ministry and bringing theology into youth ministry; we were all encouraged. Watching this video will inspire you to grow in the HOW of your ministry to teens. It will encourage you to grow in relationship and to use the "programing" as an excuse for deeper relationships. Dr. Root explains that the best theology "just happens" and that TESTIMONY is the most powerful and impacting teacher of theology. How do you build relationships? How do you teach theology? Do you agree with what Dr. Root is teaching here? Comment below and let us know what you think.

Fuzzy the Lines to Bridge the Jr/Sr High Gap

Paul Jolicoeur — Thu, 15 Nov 2012 14:00:00 +0000

Does your church have children and youth programs? I am sure they do and they are probably grouped by age. When a child turns 3 they can move from the nursery into the kid’s class and when they are in 6th grade they can progress into the JR High group.

There is good reason for this. It’s easier for the program to be more developmentally appropriate when the age gaps are smaller and it can make the group size more manageable.

If you have been in ministry for any amount of time, I am sure you have heard statistics showing how many of our teens are losing their faith after they graduate High School. They seem to fall between the gaps of our programs.

There have been many great blogs and articles written that can help us become more effective in engaging our teens in meaningful ministry while in high school. These experiences will help them stay focused and engaged after graduating.

Today, I want to talk about another gap where we are losing our young people and what we can do to close this gap; leading to better retention and maturity of our young people.

Even before our young people enter into High School they seem to be slipping through the cracks.

They fall into the gap between our JR High and High School programs.

What can we do about this trend? I have one proposal for your consideration.

Fuzzy the lines. Blur them so that youth can ease into the waters of your youth programs.

Don’t make youth programs so that you are forced to make the jump arbitrarily.

This is what I mean: In the student ministry I lead, when a student is in 8th grade, we allow them to freely participate in all of our JR High and High School events.

As they (and their parents) feel comfortable, these students come out to our High School youth group’s mid-week events and retreats.
In this way they are not forced to stay back or jump forward solely based on age. They can take some time, ease in and create relationships with others in the group.

What I have found in my experience is that the 8th grade students stay involved in both groups at the beginning of the year and by the end of the year they are fully integrated and committed to the High School group.

I have also found that the 8th grade students are well adjusted to the High School group and that the group is developmentally appropriate (whatever you can say to a 9th grader you can say to an 8th grader).

Socially, our 8th grade students are dealing with the same issues that our high school students are facing. Their peers are engaging in sexual activity, drug use, dealing with self-esteem and other adolescent issues to name a few.

The greatest accomplishment of this adjustment over the past 3 years: Our 8th grade students are not falling through the cracks; they are all involved in our church community!

Before making any changes to how you do youth ministry, pray and consider what would be best for your group. At the same time, don’t assume they are too young; they aren’t.

Recognize the most resistance you are probably going to face is those that are stuck in an old paradigm of youth ministry or those that are being too territorial.

In the end, we must ask ourselves what is best for my youth group right now. What may have worked yesterday might not work today and what works today might not be the answer tomorrow.

What are you doing to help bridge the gaps in your ministries? What has worked well for you?

You're the Hand of Almighty God

Matthewbrooks — Sat, 03 Nov 2012 14:55:00 +0000

Feeling Purposed?

I had an experience walking into a new ministry this past week, a ministry that called me to leave behind everything I knew … all my schooling, all my knowledge, my scriptural understanding, it became irrelevant as I stepped through the doorway into the world of kids with learning disorders … where it all means nothing. When I completed my first day I was in a bad mood, stressed out, and ready to quit. Then God brought me to Isaiah 14. God has purposed for us to be his hands and feet, to those who need him. Today I entered that environment with a new revelation … God’s hand is outstretched there, over each child, over each staff member, and most importantly over me.

His hand is stretched out, and who shall turn it back? < Isaiah 14:27b KJV>

There is one who has the power to turn back the hand of God from these kids … the one who is God’s hands and feet. That’s right … I have the power to turn back the hand of almighty God from these kids who are in desperate need of him. That revelation changed my life.

When you walk into that situation this week where you’re feeling a little stressed, a little worried, or even ready to quit remember that you are the outstretched hand of almighty God to these kids, specially chosen, trained, and revealed for this time … and here you are. Choose to be the light, and choose to be the hand of almighty God.

The French Fry Review: A Game for the French Fry Connoisseur

groveyp — Thu, 01 Nov 2012 17:03:39 +0000

The french fry review is on of my favorite Jr High activities we do. I would highly recomend it to anyone who is looking for a game idea, and they need it on the fly- here it is! All you need a few fast food restaurants, some fun adult leaders, and an hour or so.

The goal is not to devour french frys, but to savor them, to truly "understand" them. The attached review form reveals the various criterion by which we will be judging the fries, as well as a scoring system. You don't want just a low to high scale, you want more of a "not enough", perfect, and "too much" scale, with the perfect score to be somewhere in the middle rather than just high.

I think the real key to succes in this event/game is the adults who participate with the teens. They have to help the students savor each bite and then give them a few moments to discuss the various elements of the fry, and then debate with each other ont he best score for the fry.

You can also change the images to reflect the fast food close to you, or maybe you might want to go to fancier restaurants. Whatever you decide to do, you have to coach your adults to really ham it up and have fun with it!

Obama and Romney made this little girl cry!

groveyp — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 18:20:10 +0000

Tired of politics? Not as tired as this little girl! So funny! Don't worry, the election will be over soon!

Run with It! - Halloween Perspectives Part 2

groveyp — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 13:30:00 +0000

By Scott Kingsolver
Halloween for Youth Workers

The biggest landmine for a youth worker to traverse may not be Halloween, but it certainly can be one of the biggest and most dangerous. There can be so many different opinions (strong ones at that) on the holiday and its celebration that often times youth workers simply close their eyes, move forward with some kind of plan and hope for the best.

Having served at different churches that span the differing perspectives on Halloween, I have found it best to take a measured, approach to the event. I’d like to offer a few bits of advice on handling Halloween, but before I do I want to state that I come from the perspective that Halloween, and celebrating it at all isn’t sinful or wrong in and of itself. Zach Lee, of the Village Church, writes about Halloween and applying 1 Corinthians 8: 4-13 states, “The same principle [eating meat sacrificed to idols] applies to Halloween. Jesus created joy. Jesus created celebratory events. Jesus created laughter. Those things should be redeemed and used for Jesus."

Now that we’ve covered that, we can continue!

1) Understand Your Church- The first bit of advice I’d offer is for Youth Workers to make sure they understand the culture and history of their church. How has the church dealt with it historically? This might even need to be something a Youth Worker asks in an interview as it helps to give a picture of how the church’s philosophy. Don’t try to rock the boat just to rock the boat. There might be unhealthy attitudes about Halloween on either end of the issue. This should be something you know about before you begin serving there and are prepared to deal with. If you need to address these issues make sure you are counting the cost, are going in with as pure as motives as possible, and seek to make much of God, His word and Gospel as much in the discussion.

2) See This As An Opportunity – So many opportunities are missed in ministry because of a lack or willingness to see them as such. Halloween gives a youth pastor multiple opportunities, here are just a few:
- A chance to learn more about the different beliefs and practices of the families you minister to. Who celebrates Halloween and how? Who hates Halloween and why? It also allows you to see where the youth in the church and their parents differ on things. Do the kids want to celebrate Halloween and the Parents not want to allow it? This is an opportunity to help the youth understand how to submit to their parents if that’s the case.

3) Use This to Teach and Lead Out- This is an opportunity that deserves a longer discussion but basically, Halloween affords a great time to teach things that might seem out of place at other times. Halloween, for example, has become many different things that aren’t so positive. For one, while it is great to dress up, Halloween has become seemingly a time for people to discard modesty and rationalize it away. This allows a youth pastor a concrete example of how Christians are meant to be different in the world. Secondly, In 1 John 4, while speaking of false spirits and Anti-Christ’s, John writes, “Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.” Halloween undoubtedly carries images of Ghost, goblins, monsters, demons etc… These are scary, spooky and all together creepy. The opportunity here is for a youth pastor to teach that while these make for entertainment, that ultimately all evil is no match for the great might of God. On the cross, Jesus not only defeated sin, but also death and all the power of Satan and any of his minions. Third, it gives an opportunity to teach what it means to “redeem” things of the world for God’s glory. Maybe before/after a Halloween your students do reverse trick-or treating in the area and go to meet people who live nearby and do evangelism or simply invite people to church? Lastly, its never a bad time to teach kids about a famous October 31st event, that being the anniversary of Luther’s 95 theses, also known as Reformation Day.

4) Celebrate Well - What I don’t mean here is to necessarily throw the biggest, coolest party, but rather if you and your group are going to do something for Halloween, to do it in the right way. Don’t bait and switch the kids and don’t try to make it a lame knock-off. Rather, have a good time, get to know the kids better, have a costume contest or something else fun (with rules for appropriate dress of course), and just carry out the faithful ministry you are called to like any other time.

Scott is a licensed pastor with 5-year’s experience in youth ministry. He currently is pursuing a Seminary degree while working for a media company and enjoying life with his beautiful wife Sara. He blogs over at www.revangelical.net.

Don't Do It! - Halloween Perspectives Part 1

groveyp — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:37:23 +0000

By Lynn McCann
www.includedbygrace.wordpress.com

Halloween is potentially a divisive issue for Christians. As parents we needed to look at the issue carefully when our children were young, before they were asking to be involved in things. We needed to agree on our approach and so we decided to look into it. There isn’t much said about Halloween in the Bible but it does have a lot to say on other issues that are related. For example it says much about unity. The Church is one body and anything that causes division cannot be good for us. It also has a lot to say about not being involved in divination, mediums and devil worship.

The festival of Halloween seems to have a pagan origin which was then adopted by the church as a festival to remember the deceased, followed by All Hallows Day. A day to remember the saints. We thought that following a pagan tradition didn’t seem a good way to express our Christian faith.

However, the modern expression of Halloween has been imported from America to become a huge commercial festival. We didn’t really want to get involved in another commercial ‘event’. It seems really distasteful to walk into the supermarket to do your weekly shopping and have to pass grotesque toys and dressing up clothes which they are selling to make profit out of harassed parents.

One possible positive we had to consider was the sense of community that joining in the Halloween events can bring. Walking around the streets in the early evening, talking to neighbours and sharing sweets with the children can forge good relationships with people you may not see very often and yet who live in the same street. Parties can be fun, apple bobbing and dancing harmless and enjoyable. In this world of excessive stranger danger, parents and children out together can be a positive activity.

However, we had serious concerns about the imagery of Halloween as Christians. The Bible says to think of what is good, wholesome and Holy, clearly witches, devils, monsters and mummies don’t fit into this category. What may seem harmless on one side can have a sinister and darker side. My husband and I knew about this. A member of our family was involved in Spiritualism and talked a lot about Halloween as a day the ‘spirits’ were more active. We live near a hill where witches were associated with in centuries gone by. Each Halloween satanic and witchcraft rituals are carried out on this hill, they make the local news as if it is a tourist attraction.

We decided, after looking at these issues, that as Christians we would like to honour Jesus every day. This means we don’t want to be involved in Halloween at all. We have brought our children up talking openly about what we think and looking at the Bible together to show how we came to our conclusions. Some Christians are bold and give out tracts with the sweets when neighbours come to their door at Halloween. I have so much admiration for them and think this is a great idea. However, we stick a note on our door with a smiley face saying “we don’t celebrate Halloween, please don’t call” and make sure we are as friendly to our neighbours every day of the year!

Here’s a helpful note from my minister:
“If you are thinking about going to a Halloween party or event, I would suggest answering the following questions:

Is it in any way linked to practices described in Deuteronomy 18?
Is the event you, or your kids, are going to celebrating evil?
Is it going to lead you, or your kids, to be exposed to imagery/stories/practices which you would consider to be unhelpful and against Philippians 4:8?
Is it going to lead you into a situation where you know you are likely to be tempted in a way in which you’re liable to fall? "

So now our kids are teenagers they are invited to Halloween events and they choose themselves to say no. We are blessed with church youth groups that will put on pizza evenings instead and give them a great social evening. We hope as you think about Halloween for your family or youth group that honouring Jesus, promoting unity in the body and being good neighbours will sit alongside doing what is good, wholesome and Holy.

What do you think, is halloween okay to be "celebrated"? Have you led Halloween parties for teens? What kind of resistance did you experience and was it worth it? Post a comment below and let the community of youth leaders and workers know what you think!

The Gillette Games

JonGreenhill — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:00:00 +0000

What do you get when you mix teenagers, a giant tarp, and 100 cans of shaving cream? A crazy, fun filled night of memories for teens.

Gillette Games was an annual event at a church where I took a youth ministry position. It may have been a sacred cow but after experiencing it, it was a sacred cow that I wasn’t going to kill- I HAD TOO MUCH FUN! Back then, GG was something that we did just for fun and to let loose. At my current church, we use the Gillette Games to do multiple things. It’s a chance to connect with students who haven’t been in awhile. It’s a chance to connect with our students' friends. It’s also a chance to make memories and have some fun in the process (okay, A LOT of fun!)

Here’s how it works.

What you absolutely need:

1 tarp (we use a 20x100 painter's tarp that we cut in half and tape to make 40x50)
8 8-inch nails
Shaving cream foam, NOT gel (30 cans or so to start your supply)
Two separate areas for cleaning up/hosing down students at the end of the night
Table for game set up
Aluminum baking pans

What your students will absolutely need:

towel
change of clothes
2 cans of shaving cream (to beef up your supply)

The Set Up

1. Set up the tarp in a courtyard or other grassy area. Cut the 100’ x 20’ tarp in half and tape the two halves together with duct tape. Reinforce the corners and the center part of each side with a strip of duct tape. Nail the tarp to the ground through the reinforced areas of tape. If you are strapped for cash, this can be done in the grass without a tarp; beware that adding that dirt into the mix makes for a very different kind of messy.

2. Set up the table nearby. This is where each game will be prepped by the lucky volunteer who steers clear of the melee. On this table you’ll want to have the shaving cream as well as all other supplies that you need for the games.

3. Designate each corner of the tarp with a color or team name. This will help with organizing teams once the students have registered. It also helps with keeping the teams organized throughout the games.

4. In the weeks leading up to the Gillette Games, encourage students to bring 2 cans of shaving foam and a friend (Depending on your group size you might want to buy 30-40 cans in advance, just to be sure you gave enough).
Tip: Try to set up the day before, if possible. It makes for a long day to set up, run, then clean up afterwards.

The Night

Get Registered- Have students register for the night at a table away from the tarp. Each student will receive their team name of color. This gives you the first point of contact with the students and guests. It also gives you a place to split up students into 4 teams. This is a great chance to meet and interact with students and to get any information from visitors that night.
Team Meeting - Send each team to their assigned corner to meet their Team Leader. Team Leaders are your most dedicated volunteers because they are about to get really messy. They are also a second point of contact for students. Team Leaders are there not only to lead games, but also to get to know each student on his or her team.
Start the games! I’ll include a list of games and descriptions at the end of the article. The amount of shaving cream and mess increases with each game. You can alter the games or make up new ones; just remember, the goal is to get messy and have fun! If you are able, have a volunteer to run the setup table. They can begin prepping each game in advance so that you can move quickly from one game to the next.
Clean up- Divide up the guys and girls and send each group off to a predetermined spot to get hosed off. Have a volunteer waiting to rinse off the students. You should then help students get to a room where they can change clothes. It really helps to have your volunteers directing traffic here so that you don’t have to get angry emails about what “those kids” did to the parlor. Take the tarp and pull up the nails. Turn it over so that any excess shaving cream and water drains off. Fold the tarp up and convince some of your students to drag it off to the garbage. Have your set-up volunteer collaborate on the clean up of supplies. After everything is running smoothly, get yourself cleaned up. If you are feeling adventurous, you can have a student hose you down.
Follow Up- Maximize contact with your students. Follow up with your first time guests with the info you got from them when they registered. Follow up with any students from your group who don’t usually come, but made the trek out to the Gillette Games. Upload photos to Facebook quickly and encourage students to go on a tagging spree. When students tag, like, and share, our ministry page skyrockets in total reach. This is one last chance to connect with students about the night.

Gillette Games is a huge night for our ministry. It fulfills our first ministry goal of "Connect." In this we are able to connect students to our ministry, to each other, and hopefully begin the process of connecting them to God. It’s a lot of work but it’s incredibly worth it. If you try it out, let me know how it goes. What other games can YOU think to play with hundreds of Gillette shaving cream? Feel free to add new game ideas in the comments section.

Gillette Games

1. Overhead Relay( 4 aluminum pans)
~ Have teams sit in straight lines front to back
~ Leader has 2 cans of shaving cream
~ Leader gives first person a handful of shaving cream
~ Students pass shaving cream over their heads to next person
~ Last student in line adds shaving cream to aluminum pan
~Team wins when they fill the pan

2. Dodge Cream (aluminum pan from previous game)
~ Teams take shaving cream from bucket and fling it at other teams
~ Leader continuously refills aluminum pan during game
~ Team with the cleanest side wins.

3. Crazy hair
~Team lead picks 2 students to have their hair done
~Kids help create cool hair styles
~Leaders judge

4. Pull over
~ Team leaders coat the middle of the tarp with shaving cream
~ Students from each team line up on their side of the line
~ Students try to pull each other across the middle line.
~ Team leaders make sure no one gets hurt.
~ Make this game single gender!!!! (guys v guys) (girls v girls)

5. Melee
~Bring in Baby Pool of shaving cream
~Each Leader gets two cans
~Big countdown, Students verses Leaders

Prep Table Instructions.

Overhead Relay - Each team needs an aluminum pan and two cans of shaving cream. Give to the Team Leader.
Dodge Cream Have an extra can or two of shaving cream ready for each team leader
Crazy Hair - Give each leader to cans of shaving cream.
Pullover - nothing needed – keep filling up baby pool
Melee - Fill up aluminum pans with shaving cream, have the baby pool full of shaving cream (you should start this well in advance.

Youth Even Alert: Power of One near Appleton / Green Bay, WI

Nate Dame — Mon, 29 Oct 2012 13:11:00 +0000

Attention Wisconsin youth pastors!

Life Promotions is hosting a youth event this weekend just outside of Appleton, WI. On Friday night there is an evening concert event, followed by a day conference on Saturday.

Check out all the details at PowerOfOneOnline.com!

That's What Makes You Beautiful: Youth Group Video Parody

groveyp — Sat, 20 Oct 2012 19:23:47 +0000

This is a fun youth group activity. Most of the kids really enjoyed it!

The Absolutely Broken Heart of Jesus

Chris Rollman — Mon, 15 Oct 2012 12:01:00 +0000

Proverbs 4:23 says that we are to “guard the heart for it is the wellspring of life.” Matthew 12:34 says that what we do comes out of the overflow of the heart. If we are to follow Jesus and emulate him in our discipleship pattern, it makes a lot of sense that we would need to emulate the heart of Jesus. So, let’s look at just a few places where we see the heart of Jesus bubbling to the surface.

Jesus has a heart of

Love. John 3:16, 2 Peter 3:9
Following God. John 6:38
Reaching people. John 8:12, John 12:46, Luke 19:10, Luke 9:52
Redemption. John 10:10
For the broken. John 11:33

A few years ago, I went on a quest to discover what it might mean to live in obedience what I perceived as the heart of Jesus. I was, at the time, giving messages to our youth group in a series called “The Heart of Jesus” but felt that I didn’t have a complete grasp on what this would mean or how it might radically change my life.

I started by asking myself, “If Jesus were in Wichita, KS, where would he hang out to display his heart?” That’s where I went. It turned out that the area that I found was a downtown area that not a lot of churches would go to, not a lot of church people would think of being a part of, and there were a lot of visibly broken people in this space (I have since clearly discovered that everyone is broken, some not visibly.) There were people struggling with alcoholism, mental illness, lack of a home, criminals, and people without hope. As I began to talk with them I tried to share the message of hope. I tried to clearly share the gospel with them. I tried my hardest and would go down for an hour a day to do this. Eventually, I came to an incredibly frustrated period of this because I wanted someone to respond to Jesus after I had invested so much time in these people. I read that morning Mark 3:5 where Jesus is frustrated with the lack of spiritual movement and resonated with it. I also saw that Jesus actually healed someone physically as he sought to show his love and compassion. I went downtown with a different attitude then I had ever had. I was going to simply learn from people, help with whatever need they might have, and love them.

I have done this for years. I have seen some come to faith, but more importantly my heart more clearly reflects the heart of Christ today because I get to serve Jesus whenever I make a trip to downtown Wichita. The good news is that God continues to redeem me in the sense of being remade and renewed. May he do the same for you today.

Question: In what ways could you discover and begin to live the heart of Jesus? What other attributes of Jesus heart do you see in scripture?

The Love Relationship

Chris Rollman — Sun, 14 Oct 2012 17:11:00 +0000

We are often hardest on the ones that we love. I remember coming home to be with my family one night. My children, who were very young at the time, were doing something that I had asked them not to do, my wife was not doing what I thought she should be doing, and I was frustrated with a day full of meetings that didn’t go as planned. I snapped. In contrast, I hadn’t snapped all day. I was nice with the people that I worked with, I was nice with the people that I was meeting with, I was caring with the men that I was caring for, and I was captured in relationship by the teenagers that I was serving. But when I came home, I turned into someone else.

The gospel is foundationally a story of love. It is because God loved us first (Romans 5:8) and sent Jesus, his Son (John 3:16), that we respond to his call to “Love God” and “Love others.” (Matthew 22:36-40)

If I am going to be a person that is absolutely characterized by obedience in this area (Because of the love of God in my own life) I have to be very careful to be the same person in my church environment as I am in my home environment as I am in my social environment. As youth workers, we preach the dangers of not being consistent in our walk with Jesus, and yet, sometimes we live as segmented as our teenagers live. At some point, at some time, we begin to wonder who we actually are. Are we the person that loves our job, church, and staff? Or are we the person that snaps regularly at home and feels angry on the inside? Clearly there is a tension that exists in our life between our ‘old self’ and ‘new self’(Just read Romans Chapter 8). But when our life is characterized by compartmentalizing our relationships, we will find ourselves pushing toward burnout very quickly.

Question: How well do you live love consistently from one relational sphere to the next? Is there anyone that you need to apologize to and ‘turn over a new leaf?’

Overflow

Chris Rollman — Thu, 11 Oct 2012 12:01:00 +0000

“Do your devotions apart from Prep.”

I heard this early on in ministry and desperately tried to live by it. I would set aside some time each and every day to do my own devotions and to seek God’s face in prayer, apart from ministry and apart from preparation. I then set aside some clear time to prep for speaking, preaching, or teaching in whatever context I needed to do so next. I successfully separated these two out for the first several years of my life.

Then I had a child.

When Isaiah was born, I was still trying to separate out my devotional time from my preparation time. It worked for a little while, and then I realized that after I got done with my devotional time and into my preparation time I was wanting to teach what God was teaching me in the hour or two that I spent with him earlier that morning. I began writing messages, teaching scripts, and curriculum out of the nuggets of truth that I was gathering in my devotional time. I began to share deeply from my own heart in these moments what God was doing internally. I found that I was coming alive as I was writing a message and not just plowing through something because it was necessary and urgent. I became free in my preparation time. Some people ask me why I changed. I think I changed because the parts of my life began to tie together clearly with a baby son. My family had grown, my son was my own flesh and blood, and my faith and dependence on God was and is extremely necessary as I seek to raise a Christ following child. I also think the practical truth of not having the same amount of time with a new child may have contributed to the change.

I came across Luke 6:45 years ago, and am struck with this verse as I think about my ability to prepare and my ability to lead others toward Christlikeness. If I am not a vessel that truth is flowing into and out of, the stream is stagnant. For me, when I was trying to separate out my devotion to God from my preparation, the compartments limited what overflow meant. Once I unlocked the door between the two, my preparation was better and my devotions were rich and productive as I sought to follow Jesus in all that I was doing.

Question: Would it be freeing to you to be able to prep and do your devotions at the same time in the day? Why or why not? Some people will argue for the compartmentalization, and for good reason. Why might it be good for you to separate these to compartments with clarity? What are you currently learning from scripture that you should teach in your next teaching environment?

Slow Down to Speed Up

Chris Rollman — Wed, 10 Oct 2012 13:01:00 +0000

“I am just in a busy season.”

If you are like me, you have heard that from others in ministry or you have said it yourself in an attempt to thwart someone's pesky question about whether or not you should take on more or whether you should take a small break. What I have determined is that whenever I am answering this way that I probably need to evaluate all that I am doing and figure out what needs to be delegated, marked as done, or dumped on my ‘to do’ list. The truth is, we are always in a ‘busy season’ in ministry. Jesus gave us the task and the mission of making disciples and that never ends. We always have more families to touch, more teenagers to love, more systems to run, and more programs to maintain. The ‘busy season’ in ministry never ends. To answer that ‘this is just a busy season’ may be inaccurate because you are simply in life as you know it and in what God has called you to do.

But.

I think that sometimes we forget about the way that God modeled what it meant to simply step away from the busy season, or just life as usual, to maintain sanity, to recharge, and to reengage with the relationship that we are discipling people toward.

God rested on Day 7 of creation. Regardless of your understanding of creation, God took some time away from the ‘busy season’ of life to be in relationship with his Son, Holy Spirit, and creation that he had created. The Jewish nation took this model and lived it out in community together by demanding a ‘sabbath, a day of rest’ from each person in their community. The danger that the Jewish nation lived was legalism (which clearly happened over time) but the benefits of the Sabbath as they knew it were profound.

When I take a Sabbath, I am resting in Christ, my savior and redeemer. I come back to the work of God recharged, reenergized, renewed for another 6 days of ‘the busy season.’
When I rest, I am declaring my dependence on God that it isn’t about ME DOING but about God “Being” God in someone’s life and in the process of discipleship. I can’t change anyone spiritually, and the good news is, I don’t have to.
Sabbath allows for clear reflection on the mundane tasks that we engage in throughout the week. Maybe it is a time where we can determine what needs to be dumped from our regular routine in an effort to do the things that count.
It’s a chance for focused time in relationships that we have with people, which is really what this is all about.

Question: When is your next period of rest? When is your next Sabbath? Do you need to take a day? A week? A month? What would it take to make this happen? Where else in scripture do you see the Sabbath as a normative part of a follower of Jesus life?

The Great Exchange

Chris Rollman — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 18:56:25 +0000

I have the tendency and temptation in my own life to be concerned with how I appear to others. My family, my friends, my church, my co-workers, and my supervisor are all watching me, all the time, and it causes me to worry and carry concern. I suspect that I am not in this boat all alone. As human beings, we care what other people think. What I have found is that this spills into my relationship with the God of the universe as well. I begin to try harder, do things better, look good on the outside, all so that God would ‘love me more’ or ‘bless me more’ or ‘do more for me.’ The reality is, the righteousness that I have in the sight of God is not self produced. In fact, if God were to actually examine my righteousness and evaluate it for what it is, it would clearly be sinful, as if I were shaking my fist in the face of God.

Youth Pastors, the beauty of the gospel is this: God sees Jesus as though he lived my life so that God could see me like I lived Jesus’ perfect life.

Matthew 6 is focused and centered on the theme of righteousness. There is a contrast between my righteous acts and the righteousness of Jesus. Verse 33 says that we seek the Kingdom of God and “His Righteousness” that all of these things would be added unto us. This is not some promise verse that says we will ‘get’ everything because we seek him, rather, it simply points out ‘the great exchange’ and how Jesus gave his life for mine.

In our youth ministries, as we work with students, this is what we must keep reminding them. Sometimes, I am better at reminding students of this then I am myself. I must live in light of this truth and continue to allow Jesus to transform me from the inside out.

Question: Are you living in awe of God’s great exchange? Does this motivate you in all aspects of living your life?

Jeremy Zach will blow you away!

groveyp — Wed, 12 Sep 2012 01:30:00 +0000

Options for training are everywhere (especially at Called to Youth Ministry!), but this is one coach and facilitator that you won't want to miss. He is a techy guy with years of youth ministry experience. He is huge on networking with many pastors from across the country and will provide you with some solid resources and helps for your ministry.

Jeremy Zach is an XP3 Orange specialist. He has an MDiv from Fuller Theological Seminary. Things that makes him smile: his wife, online technology, student ministry, blogging, hot sauce and the Jason Bourne trilogy.

He is a nine-year youth worker guinea pig trying to experiment with what works and what doesn’t in the church context. He places a high value on connecting with and learning from other youth workers.

Jeremy is very excited about being one of our online facilitators for Creating a Movement of Student Discipleship. He will be an extremely valuable resource for your ministry providing insight on what works and what doesn’t (or hasn’t for him) and he can offer a wide range of opportunities and resources for you and your ministry to teens!

Sign up for Jeremy's Group Today
Mondays, 10 AM Central Time
Starts Sept. 24 for 7 weeks
Early bird (deadline this Friday): $59, Late: $79

Leneita Fix: Who she is and why you need to hang out with her!

groveyp — Tue, 11 Sep 2012 22:30:00 +0000

So why would you sign up online for a training with Called to Youth Ministry? This is one facilitator that you will want to hang out with. In fact, scratch that... You NEED to hang out with her. Why you might ask? Great question...

Leneita is passionate about developing and training youth-oriented programs that are looking to take a generation from surviving to thriving in Christ. She is a dedicated author, youth leader, wife and mother.

Her primary work is “No Teenager Left Behind: 10 HARD-TO-HANDLE TEENAGERS AND HOW TO BREAK THROUGH WITH THEM” but she also co-authored new LIVE curriculum (Urban LIVE). Watch a video from Leneita below, we think it reveals her heart for “that kid” and In No Teenager Left Behind, Leneita Fix paints a picture of students who can fall through the cracks of our youth ministries, a picture rooted in her own teenage struggle with insecurities and doubt and low self-esteem. These are the students that we pretend we are too busy for. They're the ones that are lost and we feel totally unqualified to reach.

She is excited to join our team of facilitators and we believe that you will learn from her and find that her leadership will GREATLY increase your effectiveness in reaching teens in your community, discipling teens in your church, and encourage you in your own walk with God.

Who is Leneita? Check this short video out:

The Key to Refreshment: Respond

jlabahn04 — Mon, 10 Sep 2012 13:55:00 +0000

A few years back I was going through a profoundly heart-wrenching season of weariness. I was so lost and broken I did not know what to do with myself. I went to a secluded part of a nearby beach with my Bible, journal, and worship music on my iPod. I had no idea what to say to God. I could not even speak. I felt the Lord give me permission to fall apart in His presence. That pivotal moment changed my entire walk with God.

Unbeknownst to me, God was calling me closer.

Suddenly it was not about being strong and positive; it was about being weak and honest.

There is a call from Jesus to each one of His kids. By “call,” I am not referring to a calling on your life, with which to discover your purpose. That call is there, but I am talking about the very heart of God that is specifically calling out to yours.

The God of the universe, who breathed the world into being, spoke life into dust, who created dandelions and butterflies and killer whales, also created your heart. He fashioned it together with all of its complexities, sensitivities, proclivities, and desires. He held it in His hands. You can trust Him with it.

All that being said, He knows your heart, and knows when it is thirsty for His touch.

He is calling out to you in your weariness.

He knows your name, but do you know His voice?

This is what it is saying:
“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:28-29

He is perfectly okay with your weakness.

Are you?

It is only when you recognize this weakness that you give God room to move.

Jeremiah 31:25 “For I satisfy the weary ones and refresh everyone who languishes.”

This is a promise for us to claim when we are weary. Believe in the Truth of these words, and cry out for Him to satisfy your weary soul. He wants to meet you and refresh you. He can only do it if you come to Him, and respond to the call.

Consider joining one of our training groups the week of September 24th. You can join a group dedicated to prayer called Priorities. Another option would be Creating a Movement of Student Discipleship which focuses on the nuts and bolts of youth ministry strategy planning.

Youth Pastor Panel: Why Networking Is Important

jodi — Thu, 06 Sep 2012 12:30:00 +0000

Networking is a common concept in the business world. It’s all about who you know, right? But sometimes in ministry we get the misconception of the church down the street as competition, when honestly they should be someone we can learn from and grow with. As ministry leaders our goal is to bring people to Christ and to love on them.

It's a common goal for all of us, so why not do it together? That's what networking is about - working together, sharing ideas, colloborating, praying for, and encouraging each other. We wanted to dive in a just a bit deeper to see what other leaders in youth ministry are doing to help each other out. Check out what they had to say!

1. How would you define networking for pastors?

BRIAN (President and Founder of youthmark.com): I would define a network as a gathering of pastors and leaders for the purpose of refuge, prayer, accountability, encouragement and sharpening of one another. Secondary purposes for networking certainly include: common events, information about ministry opportunities and advertisements, devotions and topical conversations.

CHRISTOPHER (Youth for Christ Director and blogger at christopherschmitz.blogspot.com): Networking is largely defined as interaction, but I think it is critically important, especially in regards to ministry and Christianity to look at it through the lens of relationship. Networking is building and utilizing it in a way with specific intent and purpose, but it is relational nonetheless. People use Facebook for both personal and business reasons and maybe have different groups to compartmentalize them by function and purpose, but no networking exists if the relationship is dead by non-interaction or cessation of relationship.

DAVE (Youth Pastor and a blogger at davelibbon.com): Networking for pastors can be a sharp double-edged sword if we’re honest about it. There have been times I’ve sat in gatherings solely to compare what I was or was not doing or somehow gage if I was being successful or not (most often this ended in me feeling a failure that I wasn’t succeeding or prideful that my ministry was better in some aspect). My human sinfulness and success idolatry are redeemed by Christ, I feel a healthy definition of networking is reminding myself and others that we are 1) not in this alone and 2) that the gospel is bigger then just what God’s doing at the church I attend.

TODD (Associate Pastor and blogger at asowerslife.net): Networking for pastors is a social and professional interaction between pastors for the purpose of relationship, accountability, equipping and mentoring, and advice.

DAN (Director of Youth and Young adults and blogger at emergingyouth.wordpress.com): In my experience, networking is a strategic collaboration of ministry colleagues for both friendship, support, and partnerships. Networking could function as a pastor support group in which pastors from various churches in a particular locale meeting regularity to discuss personal and pastoral issues they cannot share within their own congregation. Additionally, networking could serve as a platform for churches to work together towards a special goal or project with a community. Personally, I have benefited from networking across a wide range of ministry professions and geographic areas. This has lead to enriching conversations and travel opportunities where I have both spiritually and professionally learned a great deal from others.

2. How often do you meet with other pastors in your community?

BRIAN: One of the networks I meet with gets together at a local coffee shop on a weekly basis. This network consists of six or seven youth leaders (both full time and part time) and para church leaders. This group is very centered around prayer and refuge and we do a lot of “group” things together like camps and retreats.

The second group that I lead serves a much larger area. We meet once a month for lunch at a pizza place and any given month we have anywhere up to ten youth leaders. This meeting has more of a “group discussion” feel. I’ll bring up a youth ministry or church related topic and this will be an iron-sharpens-iron type setting. Community is still key, but much harder to build with just a monthly meeting (when any given month other meetings may take precedence on the one time we are meeting).

In about 20 years of networking I have done everything from Frisbee Golf Tournaments to taking network-wide mission trips with the other youth ministries. Some of my best friendships have been formed because of these settings!

CHRISTOPHER: I personally meet with other pastors as often as possible. I probably get to it about every two weeks. If it were possible I would meet twice a week: more, smaller meetings would be better than longer meetings very infrequently.

DAVE: Our network meets on a monthly basis.

TODD: I strive to meet with other pastors in my community outside of my church, a multi-pastor church, at least once a month. I find that even though we work together and some of the pastors in my church are my supervisors there is still a sense of networking there as well.

DAN: I am part of an intention development group for pastors instituted by Fuller Theological Seminary called "Micah Group". We meet once a month for five hours. Additionally, I have an online network of youth ministry colleagues through various social media platforms such as my blog, Facebook and Twitter who I connect with on a weekly basis.

3. Can you tell us about a time when you felt lonely in ministry?

BRIAN: I have spent the majority of my ministry career in the Seattle area and networking was always a part of that history. From the first week on the job (and getting an invite to a youth pastor breakfast) to this coming week where one of my networks continues to meet weekly. However, there was a 19-month season of ministry when we moved to Phoenix where I wasn't part of anything. I attempted to start a local youth pastor network, but it seemed I hit the town around the same time that much transition was taking place. Every attempt to start something was met with resistance. My networking efforts moved to phone calls with old friends.

This was also the time where I most needed that type of network since it was a tough season to go through. I was in a new place, a new church, and dealing with things I hadn't experienced in a church setting before. Lonely is certainly the best way for me to describe that season!

CHRISTOPHER: There is a specific calling that God places upon the lives of ministers. Perhaps the loneliest times in my life are when everything is overshadowed by that purpose unfulfilled. I can remember being in transition, and it being the loneliest time in my life. My senior pastor had left and his replacement brought his own staff from his previous church. I was thrust into that gulf between ministry positions—that period of searching and the feeling of uselessness— despite volunteering in ministry elsewhere, which resulted in a deep-seated feeling of alienation and resulting loneliness. It’s a kind of loneliness that only other pastors can relate to.

DAVE: My loneliest time in ministry was my first two years. I was young, single, and had these grandiose ideas about how the church should operate.

TODD: I can't pinpoint a specific time, but ministry is a very lonely vocation and that is why networking is so needed. Additionally, I would add that it is good to nurture relationships with others outside of your own church and outside of the ministry profession.

DAN: I felt alone in ministry on a number of occasions. Ironically one time occurred early in my career, following a national youth workers conference. When I returned home and realize just how isolated I was from youth pastors and support systems, I felt alone. Fortunately that spurred me to create my own regional network which began a wonderful blessing. I also felt alone more recently when I transitioned away from my church of 10 years into a new church in a new country. I literally had no one to meet up with to share my thoughts and emotions and I knew of very few individuals who had gone through a similar type of transition. There are far less international youth workers than "American" youth workers out there!

4. Have you ever felt low on ideas? How has networking helped unlock more ideas?

BRIAN: Every now and then, I'd bring a different discussion topic or question so that there is never a shortage of new ideas. Whether we are discussing parental relationships, crowd breakers or evangelism strategies we are working on, we are consistently giving voice and ear to new ideas.

Doing this has introduced me to so many great idea creators as well. It was through a local network that I first heard about Dare 2 Share Ministries, which has turned out to be one of the organizations I most trust in the national youth ministry scene. To date, every single church in my two most local networks, have since attended the D2S events.

Because of the partnerships we’ve developed it's not each other that we’ve learned from, but we’ve put ourselves in situations with each other’s students as well. Sharing camps, mission trips, and other events has given us opportunity to learn from those we are shepherding as well.

CHRISTOPHER: Everyone feels low on ideas at times. I often do, even though I’ve got years of backlogs and prewritten sermons and notes and resources. Just like talking through a problem with another person helps provide cathartic relief and insight into a situation, talking with another youth worker sparks up ideas. I was at a youth astors conference once when ND Assemblies of God District Youth Director Twyla Kunz stated, “Steal these illustrations! Make them your own and nobody will ever know that you didn’t come up with this.” Obviously we give credit where it is due, but when you hear a great message somewhere else and you know it may make an impact take it and use it! It’s for the Kingdom’s glory. So, don’t steal, but don’t feel compelled to be all original all the time: you could burn yourself out otherwise.

DAVE: I can’t say that I have. I feel pretty creative over all. I will say that working alongside other pastors allows my own creative gears to flow smoother. For example one might talk about a teaching series that communicated well to his students. I fully realize that his church culture is different then my own but I might use an illustration he shared in a different context. One church started giving out some informational cards to new students who showed up. This challenged my team and I to look at how we communicate to new students.

TODD: Networking helps to unlock ideas as those in your circle share what is happening in their ministry and assist you in your ministry struggles. I find that when I'm doing this, ideas tend to flow very easily.

DAN: Yes! Every year around the end of summer into beginning of the new school year, I feel low on ideas. Networking has been the best ways to receive inspiration as well as ideas about helpful resources such as curriculum, confirmation, retreats, and games. Particularly within my own regional network it helps to learn about what other youth workers in similar contexts to me are doing and finding successful. Let's be honest, certain ministry ideas that may work in one part of the country may not work as well somewhere else. I have discovered this is especially true from country to country!

5. What are some key questions you use to start a new relationship with other pastors?

BRIAN: My strategy with new youth pastors is to go out of my way to invite them to meet up one-on-one, before inviting them to the larger group. My personal strategy is a welcome phone call or e-mail with an invite to grab a coffee or a lunch. At that setting I’ll let them know about the local gathering. Because the networks I am a part of are not denominationally or agenda driven, the one-on-one setting gives me the opportunity to introduce the new youth pastors to our “refuge-driven” setting. We truly want to be a resource and encouragement to one another.

Specific questions I use to start new relationships:

Want to grab coffee?
Want to grab lunch?
Want to grab breakfast?
What do you enjoy doing outside of ministry? Want to meet and do that?

Seriously, my goal is friendship and then eventually we may find out that partnership in ministry is a result!

CHRISTOPHER: I like to find out what other pastors enjoy in their spare time. Everyone needs hobbies and everyone enjoys sharing about their own. The ministry will almost always find things we can relate on, but sharing things like hobbies will build a personal network rather than a professional one. I don’t remember many of my past coworkers, but I remember friends from decades ago.

DAVE: Please don’t start off with “How big, how many students, the size of their ministry” questions. This only communicates that you are there to compare. I’d want to know their story. How they came to faith? What season of life their family is in? What their church culture is like? What are they reading? How long have they been at that church? Then I’d listen as an act of love. I find that when I talk to leaders so many times I feel that I’m not even listening to them because I’m in such a hurry to tell them something next.

DAN:

What brought you to this place at this time?
Where do you see yourself in five years?
How can I best serve and support you personally?
What do you like to do in your free time?
What is one great ministry moment you experienced in the past year?

It's All About Relationships

From these answers it seems like networking in ministry is just that, relationships. And it's not just for the students but for us as well! We can’t thank these pastors enough for sharing their time and giving us a glimpse into their experiences and providing some really fantastic advice about networking in ministry. Now it’s time for you to go out, develop relationships, and network with fellow pastors and people in ministry!

Special thanks to:

Brian Aaby - Seattle based seasoned youth pastor and Founder and President of Youthmark, an organization that provides services, experiences and resources to serve those in Student Ministries.
Christopher Schmitz - Director for the Redwood Falls Youth For Christ and Author of The Kakos Realm: Grinden Proselyte, read more about what Christopher is up to on his blog, Holy Schmitz!
Dave Libbon - This Pittsburgh native loves to minister to teens (which is great since he's the Youth Pastor at St. Andrews Church in Mt. Pleasant, SC). Oh and he likes coffee a lot. Read more about what Dave is up to on his blog, Simul lustis et Peccator.
Todd Vick - Associate Pastor for Youth Ministries at St. Paul United Methodist Church in Fort Smith, AR. Read more about what Todd is up to on his blog, A Sower’s Life.
Dan Haugh - This Northeast native is currently living it up in France as the Director of Youth and Young Adults at The American Church in Paris. Read more about Dan's ministry on his blog: Emerging Youth.

What are some of the things you do to stay connected with other youth pastors? What are some of the benefits you see in having a network in your life?

The Key to Refreshment: Relinquish

jlabahn04 — Mon, 03 Sep 2012 13:55:00 +0000

What is making you weary? Is it your job? Is it your family? Is it your finances? Whatever it is, it needs to be relinquished. Carrying that heavy burden on your back is not doing anyone any good, and it is especially harmful to you.

Maybe you are stressed. Maybe you always have to be in control, and your circumstances are showing you how little control you really have. Maybe you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. Maybe, every time you talk to one of the kids in your ministry, their problems and burdens only add to your own pile that is surely to overwhelm you at any moment. Take heart. Help is on the way.

The Lord never meant for us to carry these things on our own.

In fact, He died for us so that we would not have to. Our insistence to cope and cower under the burden of our struggles, pain, and weariness, is a disservice to the cross. It is as if we are saying, “Jesus, I really appreciate what you did for me, but it was not quite enough. So I am just going to keep carrying it.”

How that must grieve Him.

For so long I felt that I came to the Lord empty handed, but the exact opposite was true. I had so much to give Him. I still do.

But I want to give Him good things. Things that He deserves. All I have is brokenness, sin, and the burdens of my heart. It just seems like such a lame offering; He gave me everything, and I in turn give Him my junk? Jesus is so beautiful in His glory, and I am tainted by my sin. It just doesn’t make sense. But that is the beauty of the Cross.

Anything we lay at His feet, He views as an offering.

It does not have to be gold. It does not have to be money. It does not have to be anything of value. It does not have to be perfect. It does not have to be impressive. It does not have to be holy. It just needs to be sincere, and it needs to be relinquished. Elisabeth Elliot calls it our “material for sacrifice.”

Psalm 51:7, "My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise."

Give Him your weariness. Give Him your pain. Give Him your sin. Give Him your life.

“Could it really be that simple?” You ask.

God smiles, and says, “Yes.

What is the material of your sacrifice today?