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    <title>CareSquare musings for families and caregivers</title>
    
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    <updated>2009-11-20T12:34:18-08:00</updated>
    <subtitle>The life and times of internet start-up Caresquare.com - a website connecting families with caregivers. </subtitle>
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        <title>LEGISLATIVE UPDATE - S. 3590, Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, for Caregivers</title>
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        <published>2009-11-20T12:34:18-08:00</published>
        <updated>2009-11-20T12:34:43-08:00</updated>
        <summary>www.Caresquare.com The Senate will begin debate with a Motion to Proceed vote Saturday, November 21, 8 pm. Sixty votes are need to approve discussion and debate on the bill. This will be the first big hurdle for Senator Reid. If...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
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        <category scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" term="Senior Care" />
        
        
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&lt;div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.caresquare.com"&gt;www.Caresquare.com&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
The Senate will begin debate with a Motion to Proceed vote Saturday, November
21, 8 pm. Sixty votes are need to approve discussion and debate on the bill.
This will be the first big hurdle for Senator Reid. If the Senate votes for
cloture on Saturday night, discussion and debate on the bill and possible
amendments is expected to begin November 30. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
Below are some of the key provisions included in S. 3590 that impact family
caregivers and their care recipients. If you or your organization feels
strongly about any of these provisions, please consider contacting your
Senators about these areas.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Key Provisions in S. 3590, &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, for Caregivers,&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &amp;quot;Times New Roman&amp;quot;,&amp;quot;serif&amp;quot;;"&gt;Community Living
Assistance Services and Supports (CLASS ACT):&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &amp;quot;Times New Roman&amp;quot;,&amp;quot;serif&amp;quot;;"&gt;• The bill establishes a new national voluntary
insurance program for long-term care, known as the CLASS Act. The program would
collect monthly insurance premiums on a voluntary basis with a five year period
of vesting required. The insurance program would provide cash benefit of at
least $50 a day to permit individuals to purchase community living assistance
services, such as transportation services, personal care services to permit
individuals to work or live independently in the community. HHS will develop an
actuarially sound benefit plan that will ensure a 75 year solvency plan. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;
New Options for States to Provide Long-Term Services and Supports in Medicaid:&lt;/span&gt;•
A new optional Medicaid benefit is created through which states may offer
community-based attendant services and supports to Medicaid beneficiaries with
disabilities who would otherwise require care in a hospital, skilled nursing
facility, or intermediate care facility. &lt;br /&gt;
• The bill removes barriers to providing Home and Community-Based Services
(HCBS) by giving states more options to provide more types of HCBS to assist
individuals with high levels of needs. It also provides additional protections
for recipients of home and community-based services against spousal
impoverishment. &lt;br /&gt;
• Gives states the option of enrolling Medicaid beneficiaries with chronic
health conditions into a health home. Health homes would be composed of a team
of health professionals who would meet frequently to monitor and evaluate the
health needs of the beneficiary with several chronic care conditions.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Increasing Access to Clinical Preventive Services:&lt;/span&gt;• Requires Medicare to
pay for annual wellness coverage and personalized disease prevention plan for
Medicare beneficiaries. :&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Encouraging the Development of New Patient Care Models:&lt;/span&gt;• The bill
creates a new demonstration program for chronically ill Medicare beneficiaries
to test new Medicare payment and service delivery where physician and nurse
practitioners directs a home-based primary care team to work with the patient
and family caregiver to produce better health outcomes and prevent
hospitalization.&lt;br /&gt;
• The bill also creates a new community-based care transition programs for
Medicare beneficiaries at high-risk of hospitalization readmission. The models
may vary and will promote communications and evaluate patient and caregiver
needs to reduce necessity of hospital readmissions. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Health Care Quality Improvements:&lt;/span&gt;• The bill creates a program to
establish and fund community-health teams to support the development of medical
homes by increasing access to comprehensive, community based, coordinated care.
The bill also incorporates a new program to help Medicare beneficiaries with
chronic conditions manage their medications with the help of local health
providers. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Health Insurance Changes:&lt;/span&gt; &lt;br /&gt;
• Prohibits all plans from establishing lifetime or annual limits on dollar
value of benefits.&lt;br /&gt;
• Prohibits all plans from rescinding coverage except in cases of fraud.&lt;br /&gt;
• Requires all plans to cover, without any cost-sharing to consumers,
preventive services and immunizations, recommended by government. &lt;br /&gt;
• Requires all plans to offer dependent health coverage until age 26.&lt;br /&gt;
• Requires insurance carriers to use easy to understand language and outline
coverage options using a simple and standard format so that consumers can make
“apples-to-apples” comparisons when looking at different insurance options. &lt;br /&gt;
• Requires insurers to make the appeals process more consumers friendly.&lt;br /&gt;
• Provides $5 billion to enact an immediate insurance program to provide
financial aid to individuals who have been denied insurance coverage because of
pre-existing condition. This is a temporary program designed to terminate when
insurance exchanges are operational in 2014. &lt;br /&gt;
• Beginning 2014, new rules will end medical underwriting and pre-existing
conditions exclusions. Insurers will be prohibited from denying coverage or
setting rates based on health status, medical condition, claims experience,
genetic information, or any other health related factor. Premiums can only vary
based on family size, geography, and by age (but not more than three to one). &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Closing the Coverage Gap in the Medicare Part D Drug Benefit:&lt;/span&gt; &lt;br /&gt;
• The bill requires drug manufacturers to provide a 50 percent discount to Part
D beneficiaries for brand-name drugs and biologics beginning July1, 2010. The
initial coverage limit in the standard Part D benefit will be expanded by $500
for 2010.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Expanded Role of Medicaid Health Services:&lt;/span&gt;• Beginning in 2014, all
children, parents, and childless adults who are not entitled to Medicare and
who have family incomes of up 133 percent of poverty ($29,237 for a family of
four) will become eligible for Medicaid. &lt;br /&gt;
• Beginning in 2014 the Center for Medicare and Medicaid (CMS) will award
grants to states to provide incentives for Medicaid beneficiaries to
participate in programs to promote healthy lifestyles, such as helping
individuals lower cholesterol/blood pressure, lose weight, quit smoking, manage
or prevent diabetes. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Creating Healthier Communalities:&lt;/span&gt;• The goal of this new program is to
strengthen community-based wellness programs aimed at the pre-Medicare
population age 50-64 to evaluate chronic disease risk factors, and conduct
public health interventions. Pilot programs would be created to screen,
evaluate, and treat pre-Medicare population to screen for health problems and
promote health. CMS would then conduct an evaluation of these programs. &lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;Improving Staff Training for Health Care Workforce:&lt;/span&gt;• The bill requires
HHS to establish a nationwide program for national and state background checks
on direct care workers. &lt;br /&gt;
• Requires HHS and the Department of Labor and Justice Department to provide
greater protections to individuals living in nursing homes through the “Elder
Justice Act.&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;br /&gt;
&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/div&gt;
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    <entry>
        <title>Attractive and Functional Design Solutions for Aging Homeowners - The Best Life (usnews.com)</title>
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        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef012875b98464970c</id>
        <published>2009-11-19T12:43:20-08:00</published>
        <updated>2009-11-19T12:43:20-08:00</updated>
        <summary>Attractive and Functional Design Solutions for Aging Homeowners - The Best Life (usnews.com) www.Caresquare.com By Philip Moeller Posted: November 19, 2009 Making a home suitable for older occupants is becoming a mainstream part of the home remodeling business. Growing numbers...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        <category scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" term="Aging In Place" />
        <category scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" term="Senior Care" />
        
        
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<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://www.usnews.com/money/blogs/the-best-life/2009/11/19/attractive-and-functional-design-solutions-for-aging-homeowners">Attractive and Functional Design Solutions for Aging Homeowners - The Best Life (usnews.com)</a><br /><br /><p><a href="http://www.caresquare.com" target="_blank">www.Caresquare.com</a></p><div class="byline">
  <p class="name">
   By
   
   
    <a href="http://www.usnews.com/Topics/tag/Author/m/philip_moeller/index.html"> Philip Moeller</a>
    
   
  </p>
  
  <p class="date">Posted: November 19, 2009</p>
 </div>


 
  <div class="KonaBody" id="content">
   

 


 
 
 


 

 <p>Making
a home suitable for older occupants is becoming a mainstream part of
the home remodeling business. Growing numbers of seniors want to remain
in their homes as they age, and attractive design solutions for aging
in place projects have evolved. Making such modifications not only
helps current occupants but may broaden the market for future buyers
when the home is placed on the market.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.usnews.com/money/personal-finance/slideshows/attractive-and-functional-design-solutions-for-aging-homeowners">[Slide Show: Design Solutions for Aging Homeowners.]</a></p>
<p>Illustrating this trend, about 3,000 home remodeling and repair
contractors have taken a three-day training course to become Certified
Aging-in-Place Specialists. The CAPS program was begun by the National
Association. of Home Builders and AARP. Therese Ford Crahan, executive
director of NAHB's Remodelers Council, describes the sensitivity
training that contractors must take as part of the program. "The
remodelers are required to put a tennis ball in their nonwriting hand,
put that hand in a sock, and then try and write a check," she says,
simulating challenges that many people with arthritis face. "Next, we
put them in a wheelchair" and they have to maneuver around. Then, "we
put sunglasses on them and cover the lenses with Vaseline and then make
them try to get around. . . . It's just an eye-opener for remodelers,"
she says. "They just don't understand . . . until they've been there."</p>
 

 <p>[See <a href="http://www.usnews.com/money/personal-finance/articles/2009/10/07/norcs-unique-havens-for-an-aging-america.html">NORCs: Unique Havens For an Aging America</a>.]</p>
<p>Cynthia Leibrock is an expert on aging who has turned her Colorado
home into a showplace of aging-in-place modifications. "If you really
want to stay in your home, you've got to get serious about it," she
says. While home modifications for aging residents may have appeared
institutional and outright ugly in years past, that's no longer the
case, Leibrock says. In her experience, emphasizing the positive
aspects of such changes, particularly added safety and comfort, helps
overcome resistance. Kitchens and bathrooms are ground zero for many
aging-in-place home improvements. Leibrock breaks down improvements
into groups, beginning with those that can be done easily and quickly
and moving on to more expensive and time-consuming projects that are
best done as part of more extensive remodeling efforts.</p>
<p>[See <a href="http://www.usnews.com/money/personal-finance/slideshows/americas-best-affordable-places-to-retire">America's Best Affordable Places to Retire</a>.]</p>
<p>Leibrock's lists are similar to those drawn up by AARP, the National Aging in Place Council, and other groups:</p>
<p><strong>Do it now</strong><strong>:</strong></p>
<ol>
<li>Tape down rugs.</li>
<li>Add handrails with extensions to both sides of the stairs.</li>
<li>Add grab bars to your shower.</li>
<li>Reorganize your kitchen around the tasks you perform.</li>
<li>Add offset pivot hinges to narrow doors.</li>
<li>Replace your shower head with a hand-held shower on a vertical grab bar.</li>
<li>Do an energy audit. (We generally need higher ambient temperatures as we age.)</li>
<li>Add task lighting to improve visual acuity.</li>
<li>Be
proactive about your health—reorganize your house to encourage you to
make it fun to exercise and to cook healthy meals. Try steam cooking; a
portable steamer costs less than $100. Keep your house cleaner with a
place to remove shoes upon entering.</li>
<li>Remodel the inside of your cabinets. Add pop-up shelves, lazy susans, pull-out racks, and lighter colors, for example.</li>
<li>Add warning systems: Smoke detectors, CO2 detectors, and driveway alerts.</li>
<li>Replace
difficult controls with door levers and cabinet "C" grips, not knobs;
use pressure switches, touch controls, and rocker switches on lamps. To
test what works, try to use all controls with a closed fist. Then try
to use all of them with one hand.</li>
<li>Replace your cookware for safety. Look for stay-cool handles and nondrip edges, for example.</li>
<li>You
may need a new phone. If you have trouble hearing on your phone,
replace it with one that amplifies high frequencies, not one that just
increases the volume. If you frequently dial wrong numbers, find a
phone with a large, lighted touchpad.</li>
<li>Use your house to
reduce stress. Add a small fountain that produces the relaxing sound of
running water. Keep relaxing music playing at all times. Add speakers
which don't require wiring.</li>
<li>Buy a comfortable chair that
is easy to access and exit, with arms well forward and space to put
your feet back so you can lean forward and push off.</li>
<li>Increase
your security. Add deadbolts to all doors. Block sliding-glass doors
when not in use. Consider the many options in security systems.</li>
</ol>
<p><strong>Do it later: </strong> <strong>a</strong><strong>daptable solutions</strong></p>
<ol>
<li>Install the wall reinforcements, not the grab bars.</li>
<li>Install the track and wiring, not the $10,000 stair lift.</li>
<li>Add that study or den now and use it later for a live-in caregiver.</li>
<li>Install wiring for an automatic door opener in a tight hallway, and add the opener later.</li>
<li>Wall-mount cabinets so they can be lowered or raised later.</li>
<li>If the laundry is downstairs, wire and vent a closet on an upper floor so you can add a small washer-dryer at a later date.</li>
<li>Stack closets on multiple floors to form a shaft for an elevator at a future time.</li>
</ol>
<p><strong>Do it as you remodel</strong></p>
<ol>
<li>If you are putting in a wood floor, recess that area rug.</li>
<li>Use a nonslip finish on the wood floor.</li>
<li>Use a drop-down door bottom instead of a threshold (which is a tripping hazard).</li>
<li>Plan
4-foot hallways, 5-foot turnaround spaces in each room, and clear floor
space for walkers, wheelchairs, strollers, and scooters. Use
anthropometric measures to evaluate the route by walking through your
house with elbows out to a 3-foot width.</li>
<li>Add more windows
and skylights with low-E thermal glass. This will increase ambient
light levels. We may need a fivefold increase in ambient light as we
age.</li>
<li>Replace your cooktop with a safe and fast induction model.</li>
<li>Build a seat into your shower.</li>
<li>Replace your oven with a safe, side-hinged model. Add a pull-out shelf below.</li>
<li>Replace your washer and dryer with elevated, front-opening models.</li>
</ol>

 
 

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    <entry>
        <title>Legislative Update - Senate Passes Veteran and Caregiver Support Bill</title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/JaKPISJPHac/legislative-update-veterans-and-caregiver-support-legislation.html" />
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        <published>2009-11-18T09:07:51-08:00</published>
        <updated>2009-11-20T11:29:41-08:00</updated>
        <summary>www.Caresquare.com Key Provisions of S.1963, the Caregivers and Veterans Omnibus Health Services Act of 2009— Senate Floor Action Tentatively This Week - Week of November 16, 2009 S. 1963, the Caregivers and Veterans Omnibus Health Services Act of 2009 was...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        
        
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<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><p><strong><span style="font-size: 12pt;" /></strong><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;,&quot;serif&quot;;" /></p><p><a href="http://www.caresquare.com" target="_blank"><br /></a></p><p><a href="http://www.caresquare.com" target="_blank">www.Caresquare.com</a> <br /><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;,&quot;serif&quot;;" /></p><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;,&quot;serif&quot;;">
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Key Provisions of S.1963, the Caregivers and Veterans Omnibus Health
Services Act of 2009—</span><br />
<br />
<em>Senate Floor Action Tentatively This Week - Week of November 16, 2009</em><br />
<br />
S. 1963, the Caregivers and Veterans Omnibus Health Services Act of 2009 was
introduced on October 28 by Senator Daniel Akaka (D-HI). The legislation
contains a number of provisions to help wounded veterans, their informal
caregivers, homeless veterans, women and veterans living in rural areas. The
measure has been blocked by Senator Coburn (R-OK) who objected to a number of
provisions, citing the inability to pay for the services, and the duplicative
nature of some of the services that the VA already administers. However, an
agreement was reached between Senator Akaka, Chairman of the Senate Veterans’
Affairs Committee and Senator Tom Coburn (R-OK) late on November 10. The
Chairman believes that the bill will be on the Senate floor this week, the week
of November 16.<br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Highlights of the measure:</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br />
The bill merges two omnibus veterans’ health bills, S.801 and S. 252 which
passed the committee in September with bipartisan support. One of the key
benefits in the measure is caregiver assistance for the nation’s most seriously
wounded veterans who were injured after September 11, 2001. The bill also
contains provisions to improve access to care for veterans in rural areas by
increasing access to telecommunications with the VA doctors and specialists,
and by establishing Centers of Excellence in a number of rural areas.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Monthly Stipend for Caregivers of Veterans </span>- Authorizes the VA to pay a
monthly stipend (in 2010 up to $2,350) to a family member or friend who is
designated as the personal caregiver of a severely injured veteran who meets
certain criteria.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Travel Benefits </span>- Allows the VA to pay for transportation, lodging, and
subsistence expenses of family members and other caregivers of veterans who are
traveling to VA facility or another site for medical or rehabilitative care.
Currently, lodging and subsistence expenses of non-veterans are not
reimbursable under current law. CBO estimates that in 2010 the VA would
reimburse about 34,000 non-veterans about $1,950 a year for travel and lodging
expenses. The VA estimates that about 150,000 non-veterans by 2014 would
qualify for these benefits.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Caregiver Education, Training and Counseling</span> - Requires the VA to
evaluate veterans and their caregivers to determine the type of care veterans
need and the training their caregivers require, provide that training,
education and counseling and establish an interactive Website with more
information.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Oversight of Caregivers</span> - The legislation would also require the VA to
conduct regular oversight of caregivers including home visits. The VA is
expected to contract with home health care agencies to conduct oversight of 500
caregivers initially at a cost of about $325 a month per caregiver.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Benefits During Caregiver Training </span>- The measure would provide respite
care and travel benefits to caregivers while they are undergoing a two week
training course at VA facilities throughout the nation.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Respite Care Services </span>- The VA would provide respite care services while
the primary caregiver is undergoing training as well as up to 30 days of
additional respite care and respite if the primary caregiver cannot carry out
their obligations for medical problem.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Medical Care to VA Caregivers</span> - The bill authorizes the VA to provide
medical care to caregivers if such caregivers lack any other health plan. The
bill also establishes mental health services to both the veteran’s primary
personal care attendant, and a family member who provides personal care
services. The bill does not prohibit two individuals from serving in those
different capacities. Family members would be eligible for training,
counseling, respite care services, medical care and mental health services.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Survey of Family Caregivers </span>- The legislation also authorizes the VA and
DOD to contract for a national survey of family caregivers of seriously
disabled veterans and service members and report to Congress with their
findings. The VA estimates the survey would cost approximately $2 million over
the four year period.<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><br />
<strong>Veterans’ Administration Opposition</strong></span></strong><br />
<br />
<br />
The VA has expressed opposition to many elements of this bill. They cite
soaring program costs -- $62.5 billion over 10 years; sweeping changes in the
role of the VA by permitting family members of veterans to access medical care
and mental health services from the VA; and creating a new class of benefits
for one group of veterans over another. At this time, the Administration has
not indicated its support or opposition to the legislation.<br />
CBO Cost Estimate: The CBO believes that these provisions would cost $5.6
billion in FY 2010, $26.8 billion in FY 2011, and $62.5 billion over 10 years.
For more information. see,
http://thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/cpquery/T?&amp;report=sr080&amp;dbname=111&amp;.<br />
<br />
<br />
**If you have further questions, feel free to contact Meg Cooch at
meg@caregiving.org.</span></div>
</content>


    <feedburner:origLink>http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/11/legislative-update-veterans-and-caregiver-support-legislation.html</feedburner:origLink></entry>
    <entry>
        <title>City of Fremont turns to the community to Adopt a Senior this Holiday Season</title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/onxLUhpxEEw/city-of-fremont-turns-to-the-community-to-adopt-a-senior-this-holiday-season.html" />
        <link rel="replies" type="text/html" href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/11/city-of-fremont-turns-to-the-community-to-adopt-a-senior-this-holiday-season.html" thr:count="0" />
        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef012875ae2d08970c</id>
        <published>2009-11-17T13:22:51-08:00</published>
        <updated>2009-11-17T13:22:51-08:00</updated>
        <summary>www.Caresquare.com I just received this mailing from the City of Fremont's Human Services Department - the stories are heartbreaking, and they really are relying on the kindness of strangers this holiday season to help out. ************ Over the last 11...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        
        
<content type="html" xml:lang="en-US" xml:base="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/">
&lt;div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 14px; font-family: Helvetica;"&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.caresquare.com"&gt;www.Caresquare.com&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 14px; font-family: Helvetica;"&gt;I just received this mailing from the &lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.tri-cityhealth.org/" target="_blank"&gt;City of Fremont&amp;#39;s Human Services Department&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-size: 14px; font-family: Helvetica;"&gt;&lt;a&gt; &lt;/a&gt;- the stories are heartbreaking, and they really are relying on the kindness of strangers this holiday season to help out. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;************&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Over the last 11
years the &lt;a href="http://www.tri-cityhealth.org/" target="_blank"&gt;(City of Fremont&amp;#39;s) Human Services Department&lt;/a&gt; has sought donations during the holiday
season to bring cheer to needy families being served at the Family Resource
Center, Youth and Family Counseling Center, and seniors facing difficult
circumstances, served by Aging and Family Services. This year extraordinarily
uncertain economic times have created an even bigger need to assist more
families and elders than in years past. We also know families have emergency
needs all year round, not just during the holidays.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;So in addition
to our Adopt a Family, Adopt a Senior solicitation we have developed an Urgent
Need Fund which allows our social workers, nurses and counselors resources they
can draw upon to assist families and individuals in crisis throughout the year.
Such funds allows us to put a homeless person into a hotel while we negotiate a
space in a shelter, provides a grocery card to a family where the breadwinner
has recently lost a job, or helps a senior keep their utilities on this winter,
or provide a transportation voucher to a mother and child who need to get to
Highland Hospital. &lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;This year we
hope you will not only consider supporting families, children, and elders with
a gift certificate (i.e. Target, Safeway, FoodMaxx), check, or cash donations,
but will also help us continue to build our Urgent Need Fund, which Human
Services workers can tap into year round.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Examples of
Recipients for this year&amp;#39;s holiday gifts:&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt; color: green;"&gt;Ms.
M is a single mother of a 10 year old boy and two girls (7 and 12 years old).
Ms. M is a domestic violence survivor. As a single mother, Ms. M found it was
difficult to raise three children without any support, as she had no family
locally. She looked for a job, but she could not find a full-time job, because
of her lack of education. Ms. M wants to provide the best life possible for her
children, so she has returned to school. Ms. M is hoping for a miracle, since
there won&amp;#39;t be any money this year for a holiday dinner and Christmas gifts,
unless the family receives some special assistance from donors like you.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt; color: red;"&gt;Ms. J,
76 year old senior, lives alone in a mobile home and has very limited income.
She has three cats and loves them so much she feeds them before feeding
herself. As an adult, she had a long illness and was not able to work. Through
her challenges, she did meet a partner. They were together for 40 happy years
and Ms. J helped raise her partner&amp;#39;s children. Her partner died 7 years ago and
the adult children do not keep in touch with Ms. J. She feels she doesn&amp;#39;t have
a reason to live. She enjoys gardening, but even that is difficult since she
has arthritis. Your generous donations will help awaken Ms. J&amp;#39;s spirit this
holiday season.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt; color: green;"&gt;Rochelle,
age 9, was abandoned at a very young age by her parents who were substance
abusers. She was left with relatives who neglected her, left her unattended for
many hours each day and exposed her to negative behavior such as fighting and
drinking. After some time, Rochelle was taken in by her young aunt, Susie, who
recently moved in the area. Aunt, Susie, is balancing a part-time job with
school, and hopes to get a higher paying job when she graduates. Her goal is to
become self-sufficient, and provide opportunities for her niece. Susie could
use a Target gift card in order to make the holidays a little brighter this
year for Rochelle.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Please make your
&lt;strong&gt;check payable to the City of Fremont &lt;/strong&gt;and return it to &lt;strong&gt;Monica
Dominguez in Human Services&lt;/strong&gt;. If your Department, as a whole, would like to
contribute a donation, please give us a list of donors from your Department and
the amount each person contributed. Each contributor will receive a thank you
letter for tax purposes. &lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="text-decoration: underline;"&gt;We will accept donations until Monday, Dec. 14th
&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;for the Adopt a Family/Senior Program and donations for the Urgent Need
Fund will be accepted all year round.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Please post
flyer in your area.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Thank you for
your generosity!!!&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;This all user
email has been approved by Suzanne Shenfil, Director of the Human Services
Department.&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Monica
Dominguez&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Senior Office
Specialist&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Aging &amp;amp;
Family Services&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;City of
Fremont&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;3300 Capitol
Ave&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

&lt;p style="font-family: Arial;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;&lt;span lang="EN" style="font-size: 10pt;"&gt;Fremont, CA
94538&lt;o:p&gt;&lt;/o:p&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;/div&gt;
</content>


    <feedburner:origLink>http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/11/city-of-fremont-turns-to-the-community-to-adopt-a-senior-this-holiday-season.html</feedburner:origLink></entry>
    <entry>
        <title>Come visit us at the NAHC conference in L.A. this week!</title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/gkBsksoS8LE/come-visit-us-at-the-nahc-conference-in-la-this-week.html" />
        <link rel="replies" type="text/html" href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/10/come-visit-us-at-the-nahc-conference-in-la-this-week.html" thr:count="0" />
        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a5dcb0b7970b</id>
        <published>2009-10-12T08:36:37-07:00</published>
        <updated>2009-10-12T08:36:37-07:00</updated>
        <summary>Caresquare is at booth #1634 at the NAHC conference in Los Angeles this week - stop by and say hi if you are at the conference!</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        
        
<content type="xhtml" xml:lang="en-US" xml:base="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/">
<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml">Caresquare is at booth #1634 at the NAHC conference in Los Angeles this week - stop by and say hi if you are at the conference!</div>
</content>


    <feedburner:origLink>http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/10/come-visit-us-at-the-nahc-conference-in-la-this-week.html</feedburner:origLink></entry>
    <entry>
        <title>Dignity in Dying</title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/975qvKE2yI4/dignity-in-dying.html" />
        <link rel="replies" type="text/html" href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/10/dignity-in-dying.html" thr:count="0" />
        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a5b16893970b</id>
        <published>2009-10-01T09:16:57-07:00</published>
        <updated>2009-10-01T09:16:57-07:00</updated>
        <summary>www.Caresquare.com Few anticipate the bureaucratic nightmare that ensues after a death at home. By Kent Sepkowitz | NEWSWEEK Published Sep 26, 2009 http://www.newsweek.com/id/216249 As a doctor at a cancer hospital, I'm often asked about death—not the spiritual side of it,...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        <category scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" term="Senior Care" />
        
        
<content type="xhtml" xml:lang="en-US" xml:base="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/">
<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><p><strong><a href="http://www.caresquare.com">www.Caresquare.com</a></strong></p><div class="photoCaption">Few anticipate the bureaucratic nightmare that ensues after a death at home.
</div>
   
   
    
     <div class="authorInfo">By Kent Sepkowitz | NEWSWEEK</div>
     
      <div class="articleUpdated">
       <span>Published Sep 26, 2009</span>
      </div><p><a href="http://www.newsweek.com/id/216249">http://www.newsweek.com/id/216249</a></p><p>As a doctor at a cancer hospital, I'm often asked about death—not
the spiritual side of it, but the practical. Specifically, people ask
me if it is better to die in a hospital or at home. Until recently I
had always voted for death at home, given its promise of relative
serenity. I still think it's better. But a friend's recent experience
with his elderly father reminded me that hospitals, despite their noise
and hurry, still do a few things well in those difficult last moments.</p>
     <p>When
my good friend's father died at home, it was as orderly and calm as
could be hoped for. Yet what was unanticipated was the chaos that
followed soon thereafter, an odd mix of sober adult heartbreak and the
darkly comic. How did the expected death of a nonagenarian result in
such commotion? Because few anticipate the bureaucratic adventure that
ensues after a death at home. Hospitals and hospices, with their
legendary capacity for completing forms, handle the task with chilly
efficiency. But without their administrative help, doing it yourself
isn't so easy.</p>
     <p>Long gone are the days of the cowboy
gently closing his slain buddy's eyes and moving on. When someone dies
at home, a licensed professional must determine that the person is
indeed dead. This should be worked out in advance with the doctor, but
we have a way of disappearing at crucial moments. If this happens, the
only option is to do what my friend did and call an ambulance—for a
dead person. There are other annoyances: the death certificate must be
completed in black ink (using only certain approved diagnoses), an
undertaker needs to be selected, and law enforcement must be called to
establish that no foul play occurred. As happened with my friend,
officers may arrive ready for trouble—suspects, motives—and meet only a
saddened family.</p>
     
     <p>Cutting
the cost of health care without cutting its quality is the central
issue in the reform debate. Since a large proportion of Medicare
dollars are spent on patients in the last months of life, savings could
come from facilitating the wishes of those who choose to die at home.
This is best accomplished with the active support of hospice care
rather than the (well-intentioned) path my friend took. This approach
would be less expensive than admitting a loved one to a hospital—and
would assure tranquility for the person dying and dignity for the
family that remains.</p>
     <p>
      <em>Sepkowitz is an infectious-disease specialist at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center in New York City.</em>
     </p></div>
</content>


    <feedburner:origLink>http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/10/dignity-in-dying.html</feedburner:origLink></entry>
    <entry>
        <title>Retirement Revolution: The New Reality</title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/L8gIpspWy3M/retirement-revolution-the-new-reality.html" />
        <link rel="replies" type="text/html" href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/09/retirement-revolution-the-new-reality.html" thr:count="0" />
        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a5cb8964970c</id>
        <published>2009-09-16T09:42:25-07:00</published>
        <updated>2009-09-16T09:42:25-07:00</updated>
        <summary>www.Caresquare.com “Retirement Revolution: The New Reality,” Sept. 15th, PBS nationally airs - focusing on the stories of seniors who are planning for their futures in the wake of the financial collapse of 2008. The broadcast also highlights living with Alzheimer's...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        
        
<content type="xhtml" xml:lang="en-US" xml:base="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/">
<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><p><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;,&quot;serif&quot;;"><a href="http://www.caresquare.com">www.Caresquare.com</a><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;,&quot;serif&quot;;">“Retirement Revolution: The New
Reality,” </span><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;,&quot;serif&quot;;">Sept. 15th, <span class="yshortcuts">PBS</span> nationally airs -  focusing on the stories of seniors who are planning for their
futures in the wake of the financial collapse of 2008. The broadcast also
highlights living with <span class="yshortcuts">Alzheimer's disease</span>,
featuring interviews with <span class="yshortcuts">Alzheimer's Association staff</span>
members Bill Thies, Beth Kallmyer and two former Early Stage Advisors, Mimi
Steffen and <span class="yshortcuts">Gary Shelton</span>, as well as Family
Caregiver Alliance staff members <span class="yshortcuts">Kathy Kelly</span>
&amp; Caitlin Morgan.  Check local broadcast listings, or watch online: </span></p><p><a href="http://www.pbs.org/wttw/retirementrevolution/watch/">http://www.pbs.org/wttw/retirementrevolution/watch/</a></p></div>
</content>


    <feedburner:origLink>http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/09/retirement-revolution-the-new-reality.html</feedburner:origLink></entry>
    <entry>
        <title>Community colleges start to take caregiving more seriously</title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/j9NvYbLeXgY/community-colleges-start-to-take-caregiving-more-seriously.html" />
        <link rel="replies" type="text/html" href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/08/community-colleges-start-to-take-caregiving-more-seriously.html" thr:count="0" />
        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a558e3ca970c</id>
        <published>2009-08-18T12:05:24-07:00</published>
        <updated>2009-08-18T12:05:24-07:00</updated>
        <summary>www.Caresquare.com The International Longevity Center, with support from MetLife Foundation, has selected 15 community colleges to receive $20,000 grants for caregiver training programs. The grants are part of the Caregiving Project for Older Americans, a partnership focused on encouraging the...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        
        
<content type="xhtml" xml:lang="en-US" xml:base="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/">
<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml">

<p><a href="http://www.caresquare.com">www.Caresquare.com</a></p><p>The International Longevity Center, with support from MetLife Foundation,
has selected 15 community colleges to receive $20,000 grants for caregiver
training programs. The grants are part of the Caregiving Project for Older
Americans, a partnership focused on encouraging the expansion of caregiver
training programs for family caregivers and in-home care workers. </p><p><a href="http://www.ilcusa.org/pages/media_items/community-college-caregiver-winners-show-innovation-in-program-design224.php">Learn More here</a></p></div>
</content>


    <feedburner:origLink>http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/08/community-colleges-start-to-take-caregiving-more-seriously.html</feedburner:origLink></entry>
    <entry>
        <title>A Primer on the Details of Health Care Reform </title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/VzmaTaR9r9s/a-primer-on-the-details-of-health-care-reform-.html" />
        <link rel="replies" type="text/html" href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/08/a-primer-on-the-details-of-health-care-reform-.html" thr:count="0" />
        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a4f49896970b</id>
        <published>2009-08-14T08:58:30-07:00</published>
        <updated>2009-08-14T08:58:30-07:00</updated>
        <summary>http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/10/health/policy/10facts.html?_r=2&amp;partner=rss&amp;emc=rss WASHINGTON — With the debate over the future of health care now shifted from Capitol Hill to town halls, supporters and critics of the Democrats’ legislative proposals are polishing their sound bites and sharpening their attack lines. Increasingly, the...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        <category scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" term="Senior Care" />
        
        
<content type="xhtml" xml:lang="en-US" xml:base="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/">
<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/10/health/policy/10facts.html?_r=2&amp;partner=rss&amp;emc=rss"><span style="font-size: 13px;">http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/10/health/policy/10facts.html?_r=2&amp;partner=rss&amp;emc=rss</span></a><p>WASHINGTON — With the debate over the future of health care now shifted
from Capitol Hill to town halls, supporters and critics of the
Democrats’ legislative proposals are polishing their sound bites and
sharpening their attack lines.</p><p>Increasingly, the battle looks like a presidential contest, with
expensive advertising campaigns and Internet-driven efforts to mobilize
local support. It can be difficult to sort fact from fiction, as angry
protesters denouncethe legislation at raucous public forums. </p><a href="http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/people/o/barack_obama/index.html?inline=nyt-per" title="More articles about Barack Obama.">President Obama</a>
and his Democratic allies in Congress have made the health care
overhaul their top priority, putting their political futures on the
line. Democrats had hoped to spend the month whipping up support for
the legislation, but instead find themselves on the defensive,
responding to what Mr. Obama describes as “outlandish rumors” spread by
critics.<p><a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/10/health/policy/10facts.html?_r=2&amp;partner=rss&amp;emc=rss">read more here</a></p></div>
</content>


    <feedburner:origLink>http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/08/a-primer-on-the-details-of-health-care-reform-.html</feedburner:origLink></entry>
    <entry>
        <title>Effective Sympathy aka How to Talk to Sick People</title>
        <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Caresquare/~3/QQJKiuN3wb4/effective-sympathy-aka-how-to-talk-to-sick-people.html" />
        <link rel="replies" type="text/html" href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/caresquare_blog/2009/08/effective-sympathy-aka-how-to-talk-to-sick-people.html" thr:count="0" />
        <id>tag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a4cdfd0c970b</id>
        <published>2009-08-06T10:56:08-07:00</published>
        <updated>2009-08-06T13:58:25-07:00</updated>
        <summary>by Ariel Kleckner Ford www.Caresquare.com A friend or family member is sick with a serious illness. We want to help. We want to express our sympathy. But we don't know how. We want to say the right thing. But what...</summary>
        <author>
            <name>Ariel Ford</name>
        </author>
        
        
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<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><p>by Ariel Kleckner Ford</p><p><a href="http://www.caresquare.com">www.Caresquare.com</a></p><p><a href="http://caresquare.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a52544b5970c-pi" style="display: inline;"><img alt="Comfort" border="0" class="at-xid-6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a52544b5970c " src="http://caresquare.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341db7c153ef0120a52544b5970c-800wi" title="Comfort" /></a> </p><p><strong><br /></strong></p><p>A friend or family member is sick with a serious illness. We want to help. We want to express our sympathy. But we don't know how. We want to say the right thing. But what is the right thing to say? How do we effectively communicate our sympathy in a way that actually eases the burden of our loved one? Having recently been on the receiving end of alot of well-intended but poorly communicated sympathy, I can offer some tips. </p><p><strong>Sympathy</strong> is a social affinity in which one person stands with
another person, closely understanding his or her feelings. It also can mean being affected by
feelings or emotions. Thus the essence of sympathy is that one has a
strong concern for the other person. Sympathy exists when the feelings
or emotions of one person are deeply understood and appreciated by another person.</p><p>Saying things like "Remember you have a husband and kids who love you" or "Don't feel that way, you have so many blessings in your life" is not sympathy. Rather, it is a highly ineffective and unwelcome form of communication to someone who is sick. Telling a person these things is in effect telling them to NOT feel the things they are feeling about their illness. It is also the quickest way to get them to stop sharing honestly with you. </p><p>It is important for a sick person to truly feel the emotions that go with their illness. Anger, frustration, resentment, sadness - these are all normal things for a sick person to experience when grappling with their illness. And the sooner they go through them, the sooner they are over them. Telling someone NOT to focus on those things - to instead count their blessings - is telling them it is not OK to feel their honest emotions about what they are going through. It is a form of telling them their honest emotions about their illness are somehow not valid. </p><p>A sick person with a wonderful husband no doubt knows she has a wonderful husband. But when you ask how she is feeling and she tells you honestly that she is angry and frustrated about her illness, she is not talking about her husband. She is talking about her health issues. Telling her to focus on something else is not sympathy. It is patronizing, and comes across as highly insensitive. </p><p><strong>Effective sympathy comes in the form of sharing a person's burden.</strong> When a friend is sick, you can help her by asking how she is feeling and allowing her to explain. When she tells you how she truly feels, some examples of good responses are:</p><p>"Yes, I imagine that is very frustrating"<br />and<br />"I bet I would feel the same way if I was going through this"<br />and<br />"That must have really hurt"</p><p>All these responses are examples of validation - they are ways of letting the sick person know it is OK to feel the things they do, that you are somehow feeling the same things as they are by listening to them and understanding. And in validating their feelings, you are actually sharing the burden with them. </p><p>Believe it or not, these forms of sympathy actually lessen the emotional pain of the person experiencing these feelings. They come away feeling better because of the conversation. By validating their feelings, you are sharing their burden with them. And by sharing their burden, you have eased their load. This is the greatest form of sympathy, and offers true relief. </p></div>
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