Caricatures By Katie

Breaking News: Anderson Cooper Sniffed My Arts

2013-01-15T01:40:00.001-06:00

On Thursday, January 3rd 2012, THIS aired on national television:

And-- sitting on my couch that morning in my pajamas -- this is what happened to my mind:

Seriously though-- the girl who starred on Clarissa Explains It All (aka Melissa Joan Hart, the coolest girl in the entire world when I was 9 years old) held my painting and Anderson Cooper SAID MY FULL NAME and did not butcher my long Polish last name (the audio of which is now my phone's ringtone.) And they both complimented my artistic skills and proceeded to sniff a portrait that I painted. And all for a good minute or two on national television.

Mind blown. No words. :)

Coffee Portraits: Anita

2012-12-20T18:19:00.004-06:00

I finished these commissions this week -- two 20x24 coffee portraits of my art student, Anita.

Right now, these are on a plane to their permanent homes in Portugal.

In Portugal, people will refer to these as "Retrato de café". And when they talk about me, they will say "Katie é um pintor, ela gosta de purê de batatas. Com cabelo como xarope de bordo e os seios como leitelho biscoitos! Feliz Natal!"

Eu sou ciumento que minha pintura começa a viajar para Portugal. Eu estou preso em uma tempestade de neve Wisconsin. Você quer aprender a dizer palavrões em Português? Ok. O coelho é um idiota. Odontalgia bastardo! Fazer xixi e cocô no fogo!

Illustration: New Spark Coaching

2012-11-21T07:25:00.000-06:00

A couple months ago, I did a handful of retro/line-drawing illustrations for a California company called New Spark Coaching. It's a life-coaching website run by a really nice woman named Kimberly Beck.

I've done illustration work for life coaches, wardrobe stylists... man, I should really start trading artwork for services. Right now my life coach/stylist is Google....i.e, "Are leggings considered pants?"*, "Is it dorky to wear a swim cap in Miami?", and "Can you go blind from sleeping in contacts?"

* Leggings are not pants. Apparently I've been walking around without any pants on. Luckily I'm in my thirties now and may be blind soon, so I don't care.

Anderson Watch 2012: Update

2012-11-15T11:42:00.002-06:00

Still waiting to see the portrait on Anderson Live. Fingers-crossed.

The producer says they may have it on this week but want to keep it a bit longer. Meanwhile, I'm anxiously watching Anderson Live everyday - every time he reaches for something, my stomach drops.

Today he stared talking about energy drinks and caffeine with his co-host Snooki...even brought up coffee, and I almost had a heart attack. Nothing yet.

But!! He did post a photo of my painting on both his show's Twitter and Facebook! Woo!
Check it out...

ANDERSON COOPER LIVE!!!

2012-11-12T23:14:00.003-06:00

I got a call from a producer at the Anderson Cooper Live show today - she asked me if I could possibly FedEx my coffee portrait of Anderson so they could maybe use it on the show tomorrow!!

In the words of my sister: HOLY SHITBALLS!!!

I almost got into a few accidents (did one of those right turns where you hit the curb and bounce over it) to pick up the painting from the Pollard Gallery and now it's being flown to New York. If it arrives by air time, it will likely be on tomorrow's show. AND he might Skype interview me. AND tomorrow is my 30th birthday.

I swear this is EXACTLY how my ENTIRE day has been. Especially at 1:59. With a lot more swearing:

Ohhh Shiiiih Tzu

2012-11-07T22:58:00.001-06:00

I got wrangled into painting three Shih Tzus :) Taking a TV break. Figured I'd blog about it. Blog blog blog.

Fall 2012 Update!

2012-10-20T10:42:00.000-05:00

Brigitta Richter expertly hanging my stuff

My first show went extremely well. Sold four paintings. WOO!

Getting crunk on champagne at the opening

Bill Robbins of the Kenosha News did a great article about the show

I'm taking a month or so off from all art-related things because I am burned out and because I'm selling Breaking Bad Halloween costumes. In late September, I realized that no one on eBay was selling yellow Hazmat suits as "Breaking Bad" Costumes -- a little vacuum marketing-wise -- so I bought a few cases of them and the month has been a blur of shipments to Ireland and the UK.

Since all of my paintings are at the Pollard Gallery right now, my art studio has become my shipping headquarters.

Anywho-- I used a little bit of my eBay profits thus far to renew my website address.

For a short time, anyone who typed "KatieDylewski.com" was being directed to this young lady with search suggestions like: "Carmen Electra", "Drew Barrymore", and "Playboy Single". Should I be flattered? I am.

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If Politicians Were 'Breaking Bad' Characters...

2012-09-19T23:32:00.000-05:00

Bill Clinton as "Heisenberg"

I did these quickie illustrations for a FunnyOrDie.com article but they opted to use actual photos instead.

Here are some of the illustrations that would otherwise live for eternity in my hard drive -- enjoy! Maybe I'll upload the rest later.

Dick Cheney as "Hector Salamanca"

Commission: Alexander Duthart

2012-09-07T16:16:00.001-05:00

I was commissioned to paint this earlier this year...

It's a portrait of Alexander Duthart (1925-1986); he was a Scottish drummer who revolutionized Scottish pipe band snare playing. (Wikipedia!)

Unfortunately Mr. Duthart didn't take a lot of photographs in his lifetime, and the ones he did take were extremely 1970s-style blurry. On top of that, he also wore about 18 yards of plaid as part of his Scottish drummer outfit.

Painting plaid from a blurry reference photo is pure hell on your eyeballs. It instantly makes you feel like you've been in a Wal-Mart for 5 hours (or 15 minutes, same difference) and/or like you've been awake for 4 days watching Requiem for a Dream on a loop. I won't ever paint plaid again, ever. EVER.

Anyway, this painting was framed at Artworks and now resides with a former student of Mr. Duthart.

First Solo Show @ Pollard Gallery (Sept - Nov 2012)

2012-08-19T18:06:00.000-05:00

I have my first solo show coming up in about 3 weeks!

I'll have four or five new paintings; none are quite finished yet. A few ("Slaughterman", "Study of a Girl" and one yet to be determined) will be in nice refinished wood frames. These frames were sold to me by a very nice woman for WAY way too cheap at a yard sale in New Berlin because I told her I had my first solo show coming up; amazingly she just asked how much I had in my pocket and sold them to me for that.

Anywho, I am trying to refinish those frames today but I feel high from heat-gun fumes and am trying to track down a sander...so I'm taking a computer break.

Here's the info and the flyer:

Opening Reception:

Saturday, September 8th 2012

Show runs September 8th - November 2012

Pollard Gallery - 5800 7th Avenue Kenosha, WI

Phish Painting

2012-08-06T23:33:00.000-05:00

Don't let this painting fool you-- I do not like the band Phish. Not at all.

That said-- they do have cool concert posters. And I am dating a Phish fan.

I wanted to buy him this particular Phish tour poster for his birthday last year but apparently their tour posters are like $100+ on eBay.

So I made a huge cradled board out of maple wood and painted the image instead. The original design is not my own (I wish it was) -- it's by DKNG Studios.

And in Phish fan language, this is the poster from 6/4/11 Cuyahoga Falls, OH brah.

DVD Menu Designs - Katy Perry "Part of Me"

2012-07-18T20:26:00.002-05:00

A couple mock-up DVD menus I created recently for a design firm in Waukesha.

Portrait of Anderson Cooper (in Coffee)

2012-06-19T13:53:00.000-05:00

After many years of sitting on the floor and propping canvases against the back of my kitchen chair, I finally broke down and bought a nice easel from Utrecht. Painting is much MUCH easier now so I plan to do more of it.

Hopefully uploading more in the next month. Here's one I did for fun...

*UPDATE: He came out of the closet one week after I posted this, therefore I take full responsibility. Congrats Anderson :)

** MEGA UPDATE! This painting was featured on ANDERSON LIVE on ABC on 1/3/2013! Ahhh!

Move over "Toddler waving from trolley"...

2012-05-10T16:30:00.000-05:00

               Check it out! My sister just showed me this....



Apparently my painting "Slaughterman" snuck into one of the photos on the Downtown Kenosha Business Directory pamphlet :)

Girl Scouts 100th Anniversary T-Shirt

2012-04-17T23:24:00.012-05:00

I was recently commissioned to design a t-shirt for the Girl Scouts.

It celebrates the organization's 100th anniversary (1912-2012; there's a big nationwide celebration on 5/5) and shows the girls through the decades in black white and the modern-day scouts in color.

They're available for presale now on the main page of the Girl Scouts Wisconsin site but they're selling to troops nationwide.

Pumped!

R.I.P Apartment

2012-02-02T16:26:00.000-06:00

Being a freelance artist means paying work is very unpredictable. To supplement my illustration jobs, I regularly work as an art tutor, banquet server and house cleaner. I made and sold ugly sweaters on eBay around Christmas time; Valentine's week I worked at a flower shop...etc.

For the last two years, my landlord was lenient and let me pay when I could. I assume this is because
this apartment is very unrentable. But today, he told me to get out.

So.... I wanted to just say a few words about my $370/month apartment before we part ways:

I will miss my plexiglas windows that didn't fit in the window frames and gave me fresh air year-round.
I will miss my fridge. You always looked like you were on the verge of tipping over but you never did.
I will miss the shared bathroom; getting up to pee in the middle of the night has never been so exciting/creepy.
I will miss the shared shower that I NEVER USED ONCE in 2 years for fear of hidden cameras and spiders.
I will miss keeping socks and undies in my purse at all times for showers at my mom's house.
I will miss my trusty kitchen sink; such fun we had with emergency baths. Thanks for fitting me even though I'm not 8-months old.
Sally's Beauty Supply sink spray hose, what can I say? I couldn't have survived without you.
I will miss George from across the hall, a Vietnam vet who always knocks on my door with random questions. He once told me he dated Martha Stewart and fathered JFK Jr.

Most of all I will miss the piercing sewage smell that filled the hallway each week when my other Vietnam vet neighbor emptied his poop bucket. "Poop bucket?" you ask-- yes, he poops and pees in a bucket and empties it once a week (apparently he doesn't dig the whole shared bathroom thing either.) Most people thought I was exaggerating about this until they came over on the right day. Hot summer days were especially fragrant.

I'm off to the greener pastures now... hopefully I'll sell some paintings and never have to live in squalor again.

2012-01-16T16:13:00.000-06:00

A Kenosha native was just crowned Miss America 2012!

Congrats to Laura Kaeppler!

Watercolor Portrait: Caroline

2012-01-11T22:40:00.001-06:00

Just found this among my older paintings; it's watercolor on board.
I can't remember what her name is (I took the liberty to rename her) but I really liked the ship tattoo.

Favorite Job of 2011

2011-12-29T21:35:00.002-06:00

This was my hands-down favorite freelance job of the year.

Task: 10-15 sketches of various types of people fighting with crutches.

They were used in a storyboard for a commercial and, yes, I took the opportunity to put a cartoon version of myself in a crutch-battle with a man in a tank top. I also cartoonified Anita, a girl I tutor; she's fighting a pirate.

Here are a few of my favorites:

Christmas Work

2011-12-29T20:55:00.000-06:00

A caricature of Snap-On CEO Nick Pinchuk, and a 40's style illustration for a family Christmas card...

2011-08-23T11:18:00.000-05:00

A sketch of me by Joey Rose, the person who inspired me to start drawing, on what would have been his 29th birthday.

Miss you tons.

If you know who this is a cartoon of, you are probably unemployed.

2011-06-16T15:20:00.002-05:00

Televised murder trials and nice weather make unemployment very tolerable.

Bye Bye Oprah

2011-05-25T10:48:00.000-05:00

Pumpkin-Carving!

2011-01-19T21:15:00.009-06:00

(I'm going to pretend I haven't slacked on this blog for the last 6 months and rewind us back to last fall so I can show you some pictures.)

Happy October 2010! Can you believe it's October already? Can you believe the stores are already playing Christmas music?! (Etcetra, etcetra.)

Ok, now that that's established... here's my first attempt at pumpkin carving:

My subject, Snap-On Inc. CEO Nicholas Pinchuk, is shown here holding my carving (his head) on a platter.

How To Fix A Broken Dell Laptop Screen

2010-07-09T11:08:00.006-05:00

Haven't updated this thing in a while. I didn't die but the backlight on my 2005 Inspiron did.

One terrible, horrible day the screen went completely black. The guy at Computer Adventure said it wasn't worth the money to fix it. I told him I don't have money to fix it anyway so HAAA.

$25 later, my laptop is now a working desktop.

Does your laptop have a giant heated coaster that keeps your coffee warm? I don't thiiiink sooooo...