Chandra Clarke

2008-02-11T09:54:00.004-05:00

The Scrap Heard Round the World When I worked at a newspaper office many years ago, I used to love going through the mail. For some reason, we always received a lot of complimentary trade magazines and catalogues for niche markets - things like restaurant business suppliers or chiropractic office outfitters. It was like peeking into hidden, private worlds. And to this day, 'advertising speak,'

2008-01-13T22:50:00.000-05:00

The Grass is Finally Greener You'll have to excuse us newly minted hybrid car drivers. We're both slightly distracted and a bit smug. With our lease expiring on our reliable five-door this year, my husband and I opted to exchange it for a hybrid Camry. We've only had it a few weeks, but already the changes it's produced in us are remarkable. First, you must understand that never in a million

2007-11-05T22:27:00.000-05:00

Improving With Age Oh no. It has happened. I have apparently reached The Self-Improvement Years. Perhaps it was because I caught sight of myself in the bathroom mirror early one morning a few months back. Maybe it was when I was frowning at my planning calendar and sitting in a living room that looked like a Toys "R" Us had exploded nearby. Or maybe it was having to deal with

2007-08-21T21:10:00.000-04:00

Pluto, We Hardly Knew Ye As anyone who works in academia can tell you, researchers get into bitter fights over obscure things all the time. Archeologists clash over the dating of Mongolian pottery sherds. Entomologists can come to blows when discussing the mating rituals of a nursery spider. Network theorists, meanwhile, will have Hatfield vs. McCoy style fights over clustering coefficients and

2007-08-13T14:31:00.000-04:00

A Well-Trained Mind It's been a while since I've written in this space. I've been very busy, working on things like house renovations, keeping the laundry at bay, and of course, solving the world's energy problems. For the latter, I believe I've hit upon a solution. All we need to do is come up with a device that can tap into hobbyist power. I say this because I was recently taken (read:

2007-07-09T15:20:00.000-04:00

The Best of all Possible Worlds Theoretical physicists have many ideas about how the cosmos came to be, but one of the most popular ones is the one which says that are an infinite number of universes, each of them different. There is, for example, our universe, another one where all your missing socks go, and one for your car keys. The multiverse theory makes good science fiction fodder,

2007-06-20T12:01:00.000-04:00

Hosta la Vista Mail order catalogues are evil things. I have always claimed that I hate shopping, and I also like to think I'm not an impulse buyer. Me? Fall prey to an offer on something I don't really need? Never. Apparently that's only true if you're talking about traditional shopping. That is, something that involves a long drive to the store, hunting around for what you

This Week's Column: Call the Office

2007-05-28T11:44:00.000-04:00

Call the OfficeIf you ever thought that setting up a house for the first time was a costly and complicated affair, wait until you try setting up an office.As you know, in one of my many other lives, my husband and I run a business. We've decided to expand, and part of the plan - the easiest part, we thought - involved getting more office space.First, we had to find a suitable location, and this

This Week's Column: The Mother Load

2007-05-14T01:11:00.000-04:00

The Mother LoadI've seen it happen to other women. And now I'm starting to do it too. We make a big deal out of multi-tasking computers, but the truth is, mothers have been doing it for centuries. Indeed, the average mother handles 406 things per day. A typical day might start like this:Get up. Get the kids up. Grab a shower. Clean the bathroom. Get dressed. Make the bed. Tidy up baby's room. Put

2007-04-16T00:17:00.000-04:00

The Tooth and Nothing But the ToothThere's nothing like becoming a parent to make you re-examine your values and start asking yourself the bigger questions. Things like: What is the meaning of life? Why are we here? And (when looking at yourself in the mirror and discovering more baggage under your eyes than Air Canada has ever lost): When did I get to be a 35-year-old mother of two?In the United

2007-03-28T00:09:00.000-04:00

Tiger, Tiger, Burning Bright... In The Suburbs We've known for a while that pet ownership can be influenced by the latest trend as much as anything else. Remember when Jack Russell terriers were everywhere, thanks to the TV show Frasier? Ferrets were very popular for a long time, and it wasn't so long ago that iguanas were the hottest cold-blooded thing around. Owning exotic or unusual

2007-02-26T15:59:00.000-05:00

All Upgraded and No Place to Go Generally I get along with computers. I've had a PC since I was about twelve and thus I usually understand them well enough to make them behave. Monday was a different story. For business reasons, I have to stay right up to date with word processing software; I had been planning to upgrade soon but suddenly found I needed to access an important file right

2007-02-12T00:13:00.000-05:00

This Bud is for ... Your Pooch This Week's Sponsor: -- Are you LinkedIn? Connect with me at: http://www.linkedin.com/in/chandrakclarke -- Okay, it's official. Entrepreneurs have finally run out of things to sell to you, and are now targeting your dog. A Dutch brewery has launched a beer for pooches called "Kwispelbier," made from beef extract and malt. Yes, that's right: If you thought dog

2007-01-21T20:09:00.000-05:00

Tales From The Crib The healthcare industry uses a lot of euphemisms. You'll be familiar with many of these: A doctor will tell you "this may sting a bit," right before jabbing you with a six-inch needle. The warning label on your prescription will mention "some side effects," which might include stroke, heart attack or seizures. Getting a private hospital room might cost "a little extra," also

2007-01-20T02:36:00.000-05:00

Watch out! Chandra Clarke's column will return this week.

2006-09-05T15:10:00.000-04:00

Chandra and her husband Terry are pleased to announce the birth of their second son, Egan, on August 31. Big brother Tiernan is excited beyond words. She'll be taking some time off column writing to get through that all important sleep deprivation period. In the meantime, you're welcome to browse through the archives - check the far right column and scroll down for links to previous posts!

2006-08-28T16:51:00.000-04:00

Have You Herd? The barnyard, it seems, is full of surprises. Just a few weeks ago, we learned that at least one filmmaker found sheep interesting enough to cast them as the villains in a movie debuting next month. Today, we learn that cows can have regional accents. Yes, you read that correctly. Moo could also be moue (French), mu (Greek), or mo (American), depending on where the cow lives.

2006-08-20T19:13:00.000-04:00

Stupid Is As Stupid Doesn't A short Reuters write-up making the rounds this week offers hope for the future. A German scientist, Hans-Hilger Ropers, has apparently been testing a pill that reduces the hyperactivity of certain brain cells, which in turn stabilizes short term memory and improves attentiveness. The researcher claims to have used it successfully with fruit flies and mice; a German

2006-08-13T22:57:00.000-04:00

Dogged Determination This Week's Sponsor: ----------------------------------------------------- http://www.ponderfodder.com Because great minds discuss ideas. ----------------------------------------------------- This week, from the department of teaching old dogs new tricks: Bonnie Bergin wants you to teach your dog to read. Bergin, who is well-respected as a dog trainer and who also has a

2006-08-06T19:22:00.000-04:00

Ewe Kidding, Right? ----------------------------------------------------- Spread the laughter! Forward this email to friends and family - tell them to subscribe by sending and email to: join-chandraclarke@host.netatlantic.com ----------------------------------------------------- Next month, a startling new film will be released that may well change the way you look at certain things, as well as

2006-07-30T09:23:00.000-04:00

Don't Worry, Be Happy* (*Some geographical restrictions may apply) ----------------------------------------------------- Spread the laughter! Forward this email to friends and family - tell them to subscribe by sending and email to: join-chandraclarke@host.netatlantic.com ----------------------------------------------------- Late last week, the University of Leicester released what was dubbed

2006-07-24T14:59:00.000-04:00

Taken To The Cleaners This week - why I never trust survey results. Women, please take note: According to the Media, we have officially made peace with domestic chores. Indeed, according to a story making its way around the world, we have not only made peace with them, we now *embrace* them as "mentally therapeutic." I'll pause here a moment to allow all my male readers to say, "Yes!! I'm

This Week's Column: A Snowball's Chance in... Oz?

2006-07-16T17:38:00.000-04:00

A Snowball's Chance in... Oz?Not content to come in fourth in the world medal count for the summer Olympics, Australians now want to make the podium more often in winter sports.Yes, Australia, that dry, flat, and unspeakably hot country with roughly 20 million people and 98 million sheep.*To that end, Aussies are building a $45 million (US) winter training facility in Melbourne, where

This Week's Column: Unbeerable

2006-07-10T02:34:00.000-04:00

UnbeerableThis week's sponsor:---------------------------------------------------- http://www.writinginfo.org/Free articles about writing - Hundreds of articles on writing, getting published, self publishing, web copy, writers block and much more.http://www.writinginfo.org/ ----------------------------------------------------This week: a disturbing new trend in beer. Indeed, so disturbing, you

This Week's Column: (Not) In The Pink

2006-06-30T01:13:00.000-04:00

(Not) In The PinkThis week's sponsor:------------------------------------------------------------- Ponderfodder.com Because Great Minds Discuss Ideas The community blog for learning about and discussing the latest ideas, theories, inventions and discoveries. http://www.ponderfodder.com -------------------------------------------------------------I am not an Angelina Jolie fan. I see her face too