Change your T

Bitten by an Elephant

2010-03-13T22:52:53Z

I am wondering, how many of you readers have ever been bitten by an Elephant?

As you ponder over that,

Have you ever been bitten by a mosquito, stung by a bee or wasps?

I can see you thinking and nodding your head.

Is it true therefore that; it is only the small things that are eating you up?

Solution:

Take care of those small things and big things will be sorted.

You can read my other posts at Change your T

Women’s Day Celebration Note- Power of a Woman

2010-03-13T22:53:27Z

Muthoni was the only baby in her family. Muthoni was a simple village girl, typically naïve and uninformed. However, she was striking in beauty and radiance.

She exhibited optimism against all odds.

Her parents were poor. They were peasants. His father made his living by working in a nearby quarry. Her mother was a house wife who went home by home doing odd jobs. Most of the time she was never paid for her jobs, other times she was lucky to get handouts.

Despite the striking poverty in their family, Muthoni’s mother spent a lot of time giving life lessons to her daughter. She taught her that; life is for dreamers who dreamt during the day. She went on to convince her daughter that; their poverty was temporary.

The day that turned Muthoni’s life

Muthoni was in class six when she had a paradigm shift. Previously, she had attended a crusade and got saved. But what happened this time was completely life-altering.

The revolution occurred after reading Gifted hands by neurosurgeon, Benjamin Solomon Carson, popularly known as Ben Carson. She was inspired and motivated. This was a turning point in her life.

The story of Dr. Carson changed the way she viewed herself. For the first time, she believed in herself. She believed in her abilities. For the first time she detested opinion of naysayers. She resolved to become a doctor when she grew up

She was convinced that she was engineered for success.

New twist

Muthoni put a lot of effort in her education. Actually, she moved from being the last student, to second last in the end of year exam. This was a major improvement since she was always the last in her class.

During her school holidays, things went from bad to worse; she lost her parents to horrific road accident.

Muthoni was left as an orphan.

This did not dampen Muthoni’s resolution. If anything, she was more determined than ever before. She only talked of becoming a doctor. She dreamt having stethoscope on her shoulders. She went to an extent of putting on glasses. She thought that, glasses are part of doctors’ uniform.

Things took a new turn when she was persistently expelled from school due to unpaid fees. Despite her orphan status, the headteacher was never compassionate to Muthoni.

Time to move on

She retreated to her home one evening after school. As many girls would do, she sat pensively contemplating her next action. She never cried or felt sorry for herself, instead she decided it is time to move on. She decided to look for casual job as a house help atleast feed herself.

She told herself that if she could save enough money, she will go back to school.

She landed a job in the city as a house girl.

Tough times never last but tough people do

Muthoni started a new life as a house help to a rich middle-aged divorced lady.

At first life was good for Muthoni, but as days turned into weeks and weeks into months the life became harder and tougher.

Muthoni remembered her mother telling her that; tough times never last, but tough people do. This was her mantra from then on.

Muthoni did not abort her dream of going back to school and becoming a doctor.

One evening, while having dinner, she requested her employer to take her back to school. As she expected the boss declined. Her excuse was that, anyone who was always the last in class could not make it in life.

Muthoni was disappointed but was not discouraged.

She did not lose her interest of going back to school. She made a second request to her employer to save her wages until it was enough for school fees. The landlady agreed.

You cannot start all over again, but you can make a new beginning.

After several years of hard work and little pay, Muthoni saved enough to make a new beginning. She went back to school albeit being older than her classmates

Muthoni had vowed never to be the last again. Probably her age and determination helped. She passed through the remainder of her primary education and went to High school.

Her high school grades were completely opposite of her lower primary school grades.

She was always the best student. Hard work, determination and persistence were paying dividends. Muthoni graduated with enough points to do medicine in the University. Her dream was close to be realised.

It’s not the size of the dreamer, it’s the size of the dream

University life for Muthoni as a Medical student was a dream come true.

Her years in college were enjoyable and memorable. Muthoni knew exactly what she wanted, so she did not find the five years to be long.

Her joy was completed when she fell in love with a tall, dark slender boy. His name was Joe. Joe never disclosed much about himself except, saying her grandmother was very rich.

Moment of epiphany

Muthoni graduated and started practicing as a doctor.

One day something unusual happened. Muthoni attended an old lady who seemed familiar. The lady was at an advanced age, Muthoni felt she knew her. But she did not know her true identity except her name. She decided to find out more information about the patient.

Surprising enough, she was her former employer. From that day on, Muthoni took extra time and care to attend to her. She offered her the best service and care possible. Muthoni came to bid her goodbye before going home everyday.

On her discharge day, as she was being bid farewell, Muthoni introduced herself. As fate would have it, the lady was overwhelmed by emotion; she covered her face in shock and collapsed.

Muthoni decided to check her next of kin. It happened that Joe was her next of Kin.

If you are reading this in facebook and you like it, subscribe at http://www.changeyourt.com to receive similar articles straight in your email inbox.

Note: There is an email link embedded within this post, please visit this post to email it.

Different ways to Convey Love

2010-03-05T14:42:06Z



	
	
		
			[Show as slideshow]		
	

	
	
		
	
		
			
								
							
		
	
	
				

	
 	 	
	
 	1234...131415►

If you are reading this in facebook, please click on ChangeyourT to be directed to Change your T website to view the wonderful photos. When you open Change Your T website, subscribe at the top left corner to receive articles straight in your email inbox.

15 Habits that will Ruin Your Life and Tips to Rectify Them

2010-03-03T13:35:51Z

Below are 15 habits that if not rectified will mess your life.

Know what you are supposed to do and fail to do it.
Ignore any advice given to you.
Be a poor listener
Criticise your looks, your parents, your colleagues, your friends, your job, your parents etc.
Think you know it all.
Imagine that everybody hates you and they are out to engineer your downfall.
Try to please everybody.
Imagining that, life will better than it is now sometime in future.
Thinking that, others are better than you.
Having poor reading culture. This implies you take what others tell you.
Commenting on any suggestion or idea.
Lack of time for solitude, meditation and quietness.
Blaming others for your failures.
Being an expert in everything.
Expecting other people to change.

Ways to rectify the above 15 bad habits

Cultivate a practice of trying to change one aspect in your life at a time. Dedicate a month in each year to change one habit. E.g. Use this month to improve listening skills. Teach yourself how to listen without interrupting or thinking what to say next. Call it a month of listening.
Advices come in different forms. They may be from blogs like what you are reading now, from churches, from friends, from parents or even bosses and colleagues. At the end of each day, sit down with a pen and a note book, scribble all advices that you think were extended to you. Decide on which to start acting on. After acting on it, tick it.
See point number 1 above.
Learn to focus on the positive aspects only. Every person has a positive and negative side. From today, instead of looking at their shortcomings, try and look at their good habits. You will be amazed how good they are.
It is time to eat a humble pie and accept the obvious that, many know a lot than you do. Be a student of them instead of imagining you are the only one who knows. Be a lifetime student. There are always new things to learn.
Nobody is out to engineer your downfall. If you will fail, you will have done it to yourself. So look within for the cause of your failings, rectify them and enjoy success.
You will never please everybody. So, if someone is not pleased with you, move on. Be prepared to face rejections and disapproval. Do your best and do not expect everybody to appreciate you.
Life is perfect at the present moment. Nothing will change in future. You might grow older, earn more or less money, have a family, but life will always be the same. Enjoy the present moment, take full advantage of it. As they say, dance with life as if nobody is looking.
Nobody is better than you. Thy might know more, be taller or shorter, have more or less money but not better than you. After all, the millionaire and the sweeper will be buried side by side in the cemetery. Be yourself and cultivate your ingenuity.
Read and get the facts yourself. They will help you to make better decisions for your life.
Learn to listen without commenting.
Create time to meditate and reflect. 15 minutes very early in the morning can be very good for this. Learn to admire the sun set, watch the moon, walk alone in the forest, look at bird flying and watch it until it perches. Simply, create time for yourself.
See No. 6 above.
Identify one area that you are very good in. Work on it, perfect it and excel.
Finally, use the above tips to change yourself and you will be surprised how your life will improve. Once you change, you will see others differently. Actually you are the real problem, not the other person. Even if you think they are the problem, they will change at their volition not yours. But you can change yourself at your willingness. If you are reading this in facebook and you like it, click on Change your T and subscribe to receive similar articles in your email inbox.

Plan for Life-after Wedding not Wedding Ceremony

2010-02-23T21:53:46Z

I am not sure why I am writing this. For the first time, I am writing an article inspired by negative affair.

The dust has not settled after Tiger Woods, the best golfer in the world was caught with his trousers below the knees.

Ashley cole, one of the best left backs in the world of football is again on the microscope lens. The lens has magnified his unfaithfulness.

The above two celebrities had some of the biggest and extravagant wedding ceremonies ever witnessed in the world.

Actually, the OK! Magazine had sole rights to cover Ashley’s wedding for 1.5M pounds.

The question is: What is important, big wedding ceremony or happy life-after?

I have to express my opinion in this one. I am a married man and would categorically say that I prefer happy-life-after than a big wedding ceremony.

However, this is not the case in reality.

Many couples are going out of the way to plan, re-plan, take loans, organize pre-weddings, book exotic honey moon locations, buy expensive costumes for the big day…..but they forget to plan for the life-after.

Why couples hold extravagant wedding ceremonies but forget about life-after

Many think that this is one of the big stages in life after birthday. This is the mentality many of us have inherited from generations. Therefore, there is a general misleading feeling that, wedding ceremony should be big, expensive and a display of opulence.

There is another category of couples who feel they have to outdo their predecessors, relatives and colleagues in the size of their wedding ceremony. This category is viewing wedding ceremony as a safari rally. They fail to realize that life is not a competition and will never be.

The couples in this category sometimes find themselves engulfed with debts after the wedding.

The third grouping of couples is which is more concerned with public opinion. This grouping wants to display all kind of opulence to the public so that they receive recognition.

This category forget to know that life-after is a personal journal away from public eye.

The Dilemma

Ask many married couples, me included and they will tell you one strange thing: After the wedding ceremony, nobody cares what you do with your life.

Before and during the wedding, you have many friends and advisors. However, after the wedding, I don’t know what happens. I leave this for you to figure out.

After the wedding it’s a personal journey.

The couple is the driver, co-driver, side-mirror, back-view mirror and the mechanic.

This is what many married men do not figure out. It takes atleast 3 years for some to realize that their mum is no longer near to tell them to avoid girls with short skirts and long legs.

This category of men is where Ashley and Tiger Woods fall.

The way out

There are many firms to help couples organize for their wedding ceremony. Some are catering, florists or venue organizers.

However, there are very few firms to guide couples after the wedding.

If there are organizations or experts to help couples, they are considered as counselors.

Approaching a marriage counselor is also held with a lot of stigma. Many couples feel it is a taboo to approach a marriage counselor. This thinking is wrong, outdated and primitive.

Many couples seek help from marriage counselors very late, when their marriage is in rocks.

Tiger Woods did not want to face his weakness and get advice. However, after messing with all girls in the street and soiling his name, he had to sit down with the counselor.

Therefore, as they say: prevention is better than cure.

Other ways to get help

Read books on relationship by authors like

-Dr. Phil

- Dr. John Gray such Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

-Zig Zigler such as Courtship after Marriage

Watch TV programs such as Oprah show.

Attend conferences and workshops on marriage.

Husbands and wives should have holidays and main outings together not separately.

Personal opinion

It is high time that couples who want to tie the knot draw a concrete plan for at least five years in advance.

I know people plan holidays or careers but they forget to plan for the life-after wedding.

Happy life-after wedding is far much rewarding than a big wedding ceremony.