Cheerfulnuts

Unwanted Attention

2013-08-20T16:37:00.000+08:00

As a Filipina with Chinese ethnicity, I may look a bit different to some people in my home town. I do get unwanted attention from strangers. Sometimes, the comments I get are somewhere between positive to neutral. Other times, the comments are racist and downright rude (read about my racist experience in a grocery store). In any case, these comments make me incredibly uncomfortable. Like when a fast food staff in a food court asked me questions about my ethnicity. Our conversation went on something like this:

Staff (after seeing my mom's Senior Citizen card): "Is she your mom?"

Me: "Yes."

Staff: "Are you a Chinese?"

Me: "Yes."

Staff: "Is your mom a pure Chinese?"

Me: "Yes."

Staff: "It's amazing that she can still speak Tagalog. But she does have an accent. How bout your dad? Is he a pure Chinese too?"

Me: "No."

Staff: "Oh, so you're not a pure Chinese... But you look so Chinese. Does your dad look Chinese too?"
Me: "Not so much. Where's my burger?"

I quickly left the counter and asked my sister to wait for my order. When I got my order from another fast food outlet and my sister got my burger, I learned that she was also asked the exact same questions. From our table, I caught the guy looking at my family as if we're Martians who had just arrived on earth. It was not a negative experience, but it was awkward. Even the guy looked kind of awkward. I just wanted my darn burger.

It's Not Right to be Rude to Customers

2013-07-19T22:37:00.001+08:00

This staff from a certain fashion store was really rude. I went to this store to look for a dress for a wedding party. If you have read my post about skinny jeans, you know that shopping for clothes is not exactly an enjoyable activity for me. The store was on clearance sale, so I hoped to find my dress there. My mom and sister found something they wanted. We went to the fitting room together.

As always, my mom wanted me to go with her inside the cubicle. Before I could go with her, the staff blocked my way and told me to wait outside. My mom told her she needed my assistance. The staff didn't relent and frowned at us. I couldn't do anything, so I waited at the entrance. There were a handful of ladies waiting in line. Some customers got confused and thought I was falling in line too. After a few minutes, my mom poked her head out of the cubicle and asked me to help her. The staff frowned as I walked to my mom's cubicle.

After that, I left the fitting room to continue my search for a dress. I found a red one. I tried it on, but I needed my sister's nod of approval. I peeked outside but she wasn't in the fitting room. I changed back to my clothes. I handed the dress back to staff so she could put it on the rack behind her. She didn't reach out. Instead, she bossily pointed to the rack, which means I had to hang the dress myself. I obeyed her and immediately regretted not fighting back. I thought to myself, "Wait a minute. It wasn't right! She was being rude to me!" But, if I made a scene, who knows if someone would videotape my screaming and hair-pulling and post it on Youtube?

I went out feeling terrible. My sister was waiting for me on the couch. She noticed something was wrong. I told her what happened, which got her very furious. I learned that the staff had been rude to my mom and my sister too when they tried on more clothes. She and my mom marched to the fitting room. My sister asked the staff for her name, which made her nervous. She refused to give her name and immediately defended her actions even if my sister hadn't said anything yet. "Your name," my sister insisted. She said her name as softly as she could. They asked for the manager but h/she wasn't there. They promised they'd come back.

My sister is like a man. She is quiet and wants to avoid conflict as much as she can even if she's been wronged. So what she did for me is really awesome. It felt good! We left the store and had our lunch. I decided that I wanted that dress after all. We went back and I was glad the dress was still there! We pretended to look for the manager to give the staff a scare lol. The truth is, we didn't care anymore. We had confronted her and that is all I wanted.

I think the staff was simply following the rules. I have no problems with that AS LONG as she did it nicely and respectfully. But frowning at customers, stopping a daughter from assisting her mom to zip her dress, and being bossy to a customer is downright rude. It's not right.

The Three Missing Ohio Women are Alive

2013-05-09T16:21:00.001+08:00

Early this month, three unrelated women who had been missing for a decade had been found in the house of Ariel Castro in Seymour Avenue, Cleveland. The women are Amanda Berry (27), Gina DeJesus (23), and Michelle Knight (32) who were kidnapped in 2003, 2004, and 2002, respectively. The police also found a six-year-old girl who is the daughter of Berry and believed to be fathered by the suspect.

While Castro was not home, Berry managed to escape and asked for help behind the locked front door. Charles Ramsey came from McDonald's when he heard someone screaming for help. He ran to Castro's house and with the help of Angel Cordero (another neighbor), he kicked the door open. Ramsey and Berry immediately called 911. When the police arrived, they found the two other victims tied with chains and ropes and a little girl.

Castro is charged with kidnapping and rape. He is said to have locked the women in the basement but have eventually allowed them to live on the second floor of his home. Based on the interview, Castro had physically abused them, which led Knight having several miscarriages over the years. He would also celebrate their abduction date every year. What a cruel thing to do. I think he was celebrating his own triumph for not being caught with his crimes.

Inasmuch as this news is disturbing, I'm glad that these women had finally gotten away from Castro's clutches. Sadly, this type of news is becoming more common that we no longer find it shocking. When I first heard about this, I immediately thought of Jaycee Dugard, the woman who had been held captive for 18 years and bore three children with her kidnapper. Even before further details has been released, I think the whole world must be thinking the same thing as I did - this six-year-old little girl is the daughter of Castro.

What is still unclear is whether or not the authorities are to be blamed for not finding these women sooner. Some neighbors said that they have called the police after seeing suspicious activities in Castro's property. The authorities, however, denied receiving these calls. Whichever the truth is, the community should start taking more precautions to avoid further crimes such as this one.

No one knows for certain what took place inside Castro's house during the last decade. The only thing we're sure of is that these women have been through a lot. They had spent so many years in captivity. Now that they're free, I wish them nothing but a life filled with love and happiness.

Help Yourself First Before Helping Others

2013-05-02T14:08:00.001+08:00

I'll tell you a story of a typical Filipino. Let's call her Greta. Greta is in her early 20's. She got married and works at a call center in Makati. In the Philippines, call center agents don't get as much pay as in other countries. Nonetheless, their salary is still considered decent in Filipino standard. So Greta is earning enough money. However, most of her salary goes to her brothers' tuition fees. She has four brothers by the way. She shoulders even her brothers' rent for dorm. Nothing much is left for herself. Despite that, she is happy to be of help to her family and she doesn't expect anything in return.

Greta is a good and selfless person. But I don't agree with her ways. At this stage of her life, she should be saving up instead of using up all her money for whatever reason. Her salary is probably more than enough for herself for now. But what about in the future? What if she gets pregnant? What if she bears twins? What if her husband gets laid off? No one can predict the future, so planning ahead is important.

Let's say that Greta does get pregnant. Since her savings are virtually nonexistent, she would skip regular check-ups to her ob/gyn. With the amount she's earning, she could actually afford to give birth in a private hospital where she would be given greater care of, but because her money isn't enough, she goes to a public hospital where staffs are insufficient. She gives birth, and thankfully, both she and her daughter are safe. Then expenses start adding up. Diapers, milk powder, baby soap... She eventually has to go back to work so she hires a nanny. She learns that the nanny talks in her cellphone all day and doesn't pay attention to her baby, so she sacks her. She asks her mom, who is living in the province, to take care of her baby. Since she doesn't have enough room for her mom in her small apartment, she has no choice but to let her baby stay with her mom who lives 8 hours away. One of her brothers fails most of his subjects. He has to repeat the same year, which means Greta has to pay for tuition fee for an extra school year. She requests a cash advance in her company. Then her mom calls her to tell her the baby's sick. She needs to send money for check-up and medicine. Her money isn't enough, so she asks hubby for money. Too bad hubby is already shouldering his father's hospital bills, so he doesn't have much left either. Unexpectedly, Greta's mom has a stroke. She pays for the hospital bills, but she can no longer afford therapy. Without proper treatment, her mom can no longer move half of her body. Greta couldn't quit her job, so one of her brothers stopped schooling to take care of their mom. Because of money issues, Greta and her husband argues a lot, which leads to their separation.

I don't want to continue anymore, because honestly, I don't know how to end their story. Their financial lives are so messed up. They could have prevented a lot of problems if only they have saved money. So what should Greta have done? Simple - she shouldn't be the only one paying for her brothers' tuition fees and rent. Perhaps she's the eldest, so she thinks that she's responsible for her brothers. But how could she pay for everything on her own? It's either she shouldn't marry early and continue being the provider of her family or take pregnancy pills while saving money for her future. She can also ask her brothers to work part-time to ease her burden. My rule is, I won't throw away my money easily without saving for myself. I will save so I'll have enough money to cover my basic needs, and when emergencies happen, I will have enough money to help the family member who is in need. The blind cannot lead another blind. The same thing applies to money. You cannot lend your money to others if you're already buried in debts.

Helping family members financially is a common practice among Filipino families. Usually, the eldest or the sibling who earns most is expected to support the entire family. Financial support may continue even through adulthood or even after the younger/poorer siblings have their own families. Sometimes, people who get support take it for granted. They don't have jobs. They keep on asking for money. They play around.

I heard a sad story of an OFW (Overseas Filipino Worker) on TV. She went overseas for greener pasture. She found a blue-collar job and entrusted her money to her brother-in-law in the Philippines. Due to the bad economy, the company tried to cut costs by sacking a lot of its employees, including this Filipino woman. She couldn't find another job, so she called home to ask for some money. To her surprise, she learned that her brother-in-law had run away. He had been using all her hard-earned money in gambling, alcohol, and women. Nothing was left from the money she had been sending through the years. Without money and a job, she could not go back to the Philippines. She rented a small room with several other Filipinos who had also been laid off like her. When asked what she wanted to tell the viewers, she said, "I learned that you should help yourself first before helping others. I learned it the hard way. All my sweat and blood are for nothing. I haven't saved a cent for my own kid. My life could have been different if only I have saved."

Wear Cropped Tops to Cover Up Your "Big" Tummy

2013-04-29T15:18:00.001+08:00

boxy shirt

I hear a lot of females complain about having huge tummies. I would tell them, "I don't think it's that big." or "It doesn't look as big as you say." It's true. Unless the person is really chubby, girls who complain about their tummies don't really have big ones. Their figure still looks proportional to me. And a great figure is all about proportions. Girls would tell me, "You're so lucky you're thin!" While I don't deny that, I think there are disadvantages to being thin. Aside from being weak and easily pushed around by people in crowded places, thin people like myself grow disproportionately large tummies whenever we gain a bit of weight or when we're full. Sure, I can wear tight-fitting shirts without those "ugly" flabs that heavier girls complain about, but after having my lunch, my tummy would bulge out. It's a rather unpleasant sight. I look like 3 months pregnant! It makes me extremely conscious and I would cover my tummy with whatever I could find.

My sister suffers more than I do. In my older posts, I've mentioned that she's a bit meatier than I am. Her weight looks more normal, but her tummy size isn't. Even ordinary T-shirts make her tummy look big. While my tummy is big only when I'm full, hers is kind of permanent. And she says she's too "busy" to do some abs exercise.

As I look around the web, I became interested with these short loose-fitting T-shirts that women usually wear over tank top. They are known as boxy shirts or boxy tees or cropped tops. They come in many forms. They can be huge cropped T-shirts, shirts with cuts on the shoulders, boxy tanks, off-shoulder boxy tops, or shirts with mesh panels that lets you see the clothes (or skin) underneath. Why am I so intrigued with these? Because I think these are the answer to my sister's huge tummy problem! Cropped tops make the wearer appear slimmer around the waist. Some bloggers abhor these cropped shirts. They say these fashion items don't flatter our figure at all. Well, it may be true, but it depends.

While I may not be a fashion expert, here are my observations:

Shorter boxy tees look better. The purpose of of these clothes is to give you an illusion of having smaller waist. The hemline have to be in the midsection of your torso in order to achieve the smaller waist effect. But, do try out different boxy shirts to know the ideal length for YOU.
Mesh or crochet cropped shirts are sexy! They're see-through. 'Nuff said.

AX Paris Knitted Crochet Top

Huge boxy shirts that fall around your waist are a no-no. This type looks just like an over-sized T-shirt. It completely defeats the purpose of creating a slimmer look. But, as I've said, it entirely depends on the wearer.

Wearing boxy shirt with a concave hemline can make your tummy look bigger. I don't understand why it exists. The concave hemline emphasizes the roundness of your belly. It exposes exactly the part of your body that you've been trying to hide - your "big" tummy. I don't like how it looks even on skinny models.

G by GUESS Brynn Crossover Tank

I know cropped shirts are risky. You may either look good or look terrible in them. Some of my observations may even be contradictory. But if wearing the right kind can make our tummy look smaller, it's worth giving a shot! All you need to do is to try out different cropped shirts and ask for a few honest opinions from loved ones. To test my theory about boxy tees' slimming effect, I let my sister try out a few of them at the mall. I am right! She looks a lot better and her big tummy is less apparent. Too bad we're on a saving-like-crazy mode now, so we didn't buy any of them. I guess we'll just wait for a sale.:)

The Most Expensive Dog in the World

2013-04-27T15:29:00.003+08:00

Source: http://www.petsadviser.com/

Say hello to the most expensive dog in the world as of this date: the great and cuddly Tibetan Mastiff! As much as I'd like to hug a Tibetan Mastiff if I happen to come across one, I'd rather just admire it from afar. Despite the breed's gentle appearance, with its thick fur and bear-like features, it is said to be fierce to people (and perhaps to animals too) that are stranger to it. Granted, it acts as a sweet cuddly bear to its owners and is even gentle with children.

In my country, I'm yet to see someone who owns this breed. In Hong Kong, the demand for Tibetan Mastiffs is growing. Perhaps owning this breed is like owning a Louis Vuitton. It's expensive and gorgeous. The problem is, not all homes are suitable environments for these dogs. An average home in Hong Kong is about 427 square meters. It's too small for a dog that can reach a height averaging between 25 to 28 inches. I'm not sure if these dogs are available legally in Hong Kong. I heard in the news that a lot of these dogs are smuggled from China.

I Love Milk Tea

2013-04-20T22:47:00.000+08:00

When I went to Taiwan a few years ago, I remember our tour guides recommending us to try their milk tea. They said that milk tea, especially pearl milk tea, is the best drink in Taiwan. I didn't try it though. I wasn't much of a foodie. So I went home kind of regretting not trying it and wondering how it tastes like.

Nowadays, it's the milk tea generation. Plenty of milk tea stores such as Happy Lemon and Serenitea are mushrooming in Manila. Before, you can talk to a friend over a cup of coffee. Now, you can also do the same thing with milk tea. I have plenty of friends who would post pictures of their milk tea on Facebook. I wondered what was so special about milk tea.

Happy Lemon
perry_marco | Flickr.com

It was not long before I had my first taste of milk tea from Happy Lemon. I forgot what I ordered. It wasn't so special to me. My sister liked it though. In one of her date nights, she bought a box of Lipton Milk Tea for me. A box of 5 sachets costs around P39. We tried it the next day, and I immediately fell in love with it! It's sweet and has just the right combination of milk and tea. I became addicted to it.

One time, my mom and I went to a supermarket when we ran out of milk tea. Unfortunately, Lipton Milk Tea was out of stock. I didn't want to waste our commute fare by leaving empty-handed, so I chose another brand, Mr. Brown. I've never tried any Mr. Brown products, but I always see it in commercials. So I chose it over the many other milk tea brands on the shelves that are unfamiliar to me. Yeah, advertisements definitely work.

Mr Brown milk tea
Sorry about the reflection!

I like Mr. Brown's packaging. It is more classy. It contains twenty 3-in-1 sachets. I love the taste. It's creamy, though my sister complained its being a bit bitter. The tea is more distinct than in the Lipton brand. Mr. Brown milk tea costs around P145.

Since my sister doesn't like Mr. Brown so much, and both of us love Lipton, we would only buy the latter when we go to groceries. It's fine with me. It's much cheaper anyway!

I just had a warm cup of milk tea this afternoon. Yummy!

Do you like milk tea? What is your favorite brand or store?

Buying Tea in Hong Kong

2013-04-16T15:10:00.001+08:00

During our trips to Hong Kong, we would drink tea instead of water or juice during our meals. Most of the time, teas were served for free in Hong Kong restaurants. As a child, I hated its taste. Despite that, I couldn't deny that a warm, aromatic cup of tea is very soothing to my body, especially during the cold weather in Hong Kong. Though I've never become a fan, I learned to appreciate tea.

My sister is a die-hard fan of teas. She especially likes green tea and she prefers to drink it in its purest form - right from the tea leaves. Sadly, it's quite hard to find green tea leaves in Manila. We always find green tea in the form of tea bags or powder sold in the local market.

Since we would be visiting Hong Kong, we decided to buy teas there. I looked up the internet and found a well-known tea store called Mingcha. Luckily, there's a branch in Causeway Bay, the area where we were staying. On New Year's Eve, we went out looking for the store. Some roads were already blocked in preparation for the New Year's countdown. I think December 31 isn't a public holiday in Hong Kong, but I guess most stores had closed early to join the festivity. We gave up looking and went back to our hotel.

My sister was very happy when we came across a tea store in Hong Kong airport before our departure. The items were expensive, but she was desperate to bring home some teas. We bought two cans of green tea leaves and a "ball" of jasmine tea leaves.

a can of green tea leaves

jasmine tea

I was amused by the jasmine tea. As shown in the picture, the leaves are in ball form. You will smell the aroma as soon as you open the container. So how do you drink it? Get a tea pot, preferably a transparent one. Put a piece of that round object inside and pour some hot water. Sit back and relax as the fun begins. Watch how the ball "transforms" into a flower! It's like magic!

tea leaves in full bloom

top view of jasmine tea flower

Hotel Ghost Story

2013-03-24T10:00:00.000+08:00

Wikimedia Commons

I want to share a hotel ghost story I heard on TV. This is a true story and had been all over the news in Taiwan years ago.

A working student from Taipei was sent to another city by his company. He was given money for lodging. Thinking that it was a waste to rent a nice hotel room, he chose to stay in a cheap hostel.

He went to the hostel. There was no one except for a man behind the counter. He didn't see any housekeeper or any guest. Heck, he was probably the only guest in the hostel. After check-in, he went to his room. It smelled really bad. There were mice and cockroaches. He thought to himself, you get what you paid for. The room was dead cheap. What could you expect?

He went to sleep and dreamed of a woman mouthing words that he couldn't understand. He couldn't see her face. He tried to ask her what she was saying to no avail. Then, he woke up. He didn't think much about the dream and got to work.

On the second night, he had the same dream. Only this time, he could see a bit more of the woman's face. He still couldn't understand what she was trying to say. Again, he woke up, ignored the dream, and went to work.

He had the same dream again on the third night. This time, he could clearly see the woman's face. Her eyes, her nostrils, her ears, and her mouth were bleeding. She was asking for help. The man was so shocked that he woke up and fell from the bed. Right under his bed, he saw the woman in his dreams staring back at him. Dead. Her hands were tied behind her back. She had been dead for many days. He ran to the
hotel staff who in turn called the police.

The student went back to Taipei. Back home, he dreamed of the woman again. She was no longer bleeding and asking for help. She thanked the man and left. That was the last time he dreamed of her.

What to Do About PayPal Fraud

2013-03-21T21:06:00.002+08:00

Anyone can experience a Paypal fraud or PayPal scam. Some days ago, I just received a fake PayPal email.

I have the habit of looking through my mail account's Spam folder before hitting the trash can button. I would browse through the mails to check if an important message has been trapped in the spam filter.

I came across an email from PayPal. It says that I have successfully sent a payment of $149.49 USD to a certain Dave Klein. The problem is, I haven't made such purchase at all. Like in the official emails of PayPal, this one has the company logo and a link to "PayPal's website" for me to see the transaction.

Instead of clicking the link, I googled Dave Klein. There are many Dave Klein's but there is no such seller on Amazon with that name. I also noticed that aside from myself, there are several recipients of this suspicious email.

I immediately researched about what I have to do when I received a PayPal fraud or scam letter. PayPal has an email address specifically for this purpose. Just forward the seemingly fake email to spoof@paypal.com and immediately delete it from your inbox. Read more about reporting PayPal fraud/scam here.

Today, I received a letter from the real PayPal. It says that the suspicious email that I received days ago is indeed a fraud. I'm glad that I didn't click the link or did anything that would reveal my password to the thieves.

If you received a letter from PayPal about any transaction that you're sure you haven't made, send a report to PayPal immediately. Panicking and clicking the link in the email could compromise your account. Protect yourself or others from these thieves. Report them.

Let's Date: A Dating Game Show

2013-03-20T10:00:00.000+08:00

Source: Loke Yek Mang | Dreamstime.com

I was watching a Chinese dating game show (我們約會吧/Let's Date!). I don't know all the rules of the matchmaking process. I just know that each guy gets to pick a woman out of the many female participants on the show. The woman he picks can either accept or refuse to date him. If the woman agrees to date the guy, they will leave the stage together. Otherwise, the guy will leave alone and the girl will stay on stage. The next guy will appear again and the whole process repeats. I keep seeing the same girls every time I watch the show. I'm not sure, but I think it has the same female participants for every season.

Before a bachelor appears onstage, the emcee would ask him which girls he doesn't want to date. Without seeing the girls, he would then enumerate the things he doesn't like, such as very tall girls or girls wearing super short skirts. Those girls with those qualities would not be participating in that segment.

In one episode, this certain Mr. Bachelor enters the stage. After he eliminates girls that he doesn't like based on his enumeration, the remaining girls go to the stage. Each woman goes behind a podium. This bachelor has studied in the States and has a very successful career. He isn't very handsome, but most of the women on the show like him as indicated by the color of the light that appears on each of their podium. The emcee gives him a short interview where he talks about his career. He reveals that his job requires him to move to different countries every 18 months. He shares that one of his married officemates has children with different nationalities. That would be tough for his partner-to-be. No wonder that guy doesn't have a girlfriend. Most girls onstage get turned off.

When the interview ends, the women are asked to press a button to indicate whether or not they would still agree to date him. The girls who choose "yes" become fewer. Then, from the remaining girls, the guy picks the one he likes best. The chosen girl is asked to stand on one side. Then another girl, whom the guy has picked in the very beginning of the show (right when he enters the stage and sees all the girls), would be revealed. Unfortunately, that girl is not among the participants who chose "yes". She is asked to stand on the other side of the guy.

The guy is given a few seconds to choose between the two women. Will he choose the woman who likes him? Or the woman whom he likes in the beginning? After some commercial, I was sitting on the edge of my seat. Who is he going to pick? He picks the latter. A short video about the girl is played on the monitor.

The girl is 29 years old. A pretty leftover woman. She bakes unsweetened biscuits for her diabetic mom. She has been in a serious relationship with a guy. Sadly, the boyfriend died in an accident four years ago. The girl becomes depressed, but somehow, she has come out from the dark tunnel. She takes care of the elderly parents of her dead boyfriend. She looks really nice.

Unfortunately, the girl refuses to go out with Mr. Bachelor. She tells him that she prefers a guy who would settle down in one place. The guy wishes her the best and leaves the stage.

Whew. The girl refusing him, that is a pretty brave thing to do. I don't mean to offend, but most participants look really desperate. I can't really blame them though because these women face stigma associated with being single. But this woman made decision based on what she really wants.

I agree with her and respect her for not being swayed by his good qualifications. In the end, it is she who will live her life. It's important to look at things objectively rather than think about what others will think. Like what the bachelor said, I, too, wish her the very best in life.

I'm My Sister's Guinea Pig

2013-03-18T10:56:00.000+08:00

That's me!
Source: Wikimedia Commons

My sister is currently watching City Hunter after I recommended the K drama to her. She would always comment about Lee Min Ho's beautiful glowing skin. He is the male lead of City Hunter by the way. My sister is very particular about her skin so she admires people with great-looking skin.

Both of us had moderate acne during our teens. My acne was worse than hers, and because of that, I had issues with my self-esteem.

After years of suffering from acne, we finally went to a dermatologist. My sister went first. Every visit, the dermatologist would prick her pimples with his special tools. She went to him twice a week. She would also buy all the skin care products from him, which were packaged in unlabeled containers.

After several visits and weeks of diligently applying products on her face, my twin's skin greatly improved. Seeing the good results, I went to see the same dermatologist. He prescribed the same skin care products. My sister stopped going to the doctor and I stopped too after having my pimples pricked once. We thought using the products would be enough. My skin didn't improve much, and my sister would sometimes have breakouts.

The skin care products were expensive. Once, we dropped the ointment on the floor. The base of the container fell off. We discovered that the base that fell off was actually a covering of another base. The inner base was concave, which means that the content was actually less that it appeared. The doctor deceived us and led us to believe that we were paying for more.

After our discovery, we stopped buying skin care products from our dermatologist. Though I know that I would get flawless skin if I visit him regularly, I did not go back to his clinic anymore. My sister decided to make her own experiment. She researched and tried many different products on us. It was a long process. Sometimes, the products would give different results on our skin. That was odd, because we're twins. I was expecting that our skin would react similarly to products. Anyway, it was hard to figure out which products were causing breakouts.

My sister didn't give up. She reads about skin care almost every day. She would even read scientific papers she found online. When we talk, she would always give me updates about her latest research. She would also document her research on her beauty blog.

My skin is still far from perfect. But it is improving. I have always complained about being darker-skinned than my sister. To the Chinese, fair-skinned ladies are perceived as more attractive than dark-skinned ones. Of course this is not true. A lot of dark-skinned women are beautiful. That said, I don't want to be dark-skinned. It just doesn't suit my face. So I was happy when my skin started to become fairer. I'm really impressed with my sister.

My parents aren't that impressed though. They prefer the easy way, which is going to the dermatologist. They would jokingly tell me that I'm just a guinea pig in my sister's experiments LOL. I would defend my sister and tell them my sister loves me and would never do anything to harm me.

I know that dermatologists are far more knowledgable than my sister. It took them years of studying before they attained their title. Granted, my sister cares for me more than any dermatologist would. My experience with my dermatoglist isn't very pleasant. So I will stick to being a guinea pig and see what happens. I wonder if I will eventually have a skin half as good as Lee Min Ho's? It's a shame that I have to compare my skin with a guy's skin.:P

Lee Min Ho
Source: Wikimedia Commons

The Pressure of Being a Single Chinese Woman

2013-02-27T22:20:00.000+08:00

I just read an article on BBC about China's "leftover women". Nine out of 10 guys think that women over 27 is too old to become a potential wife. These women are labled as leftovers or sheng nu. Chinese women are offended by the term sheng nu, though it's still wildly used.

Read the full article about China's "leftover women" on BBC.

In other countries, men aren't that obsessed with age as much as Chinese men do. What the Chinese consider as old is quite young to other nationalities. I guess their high regard for age can be rooted from their culture.

Chinese gives importance to bearing offsprings (especially male offsprings). It is the children's duty to light the incense of their ancestors. If they have no offprings, no one will do these stuff and the ancestors' souls will get lost. So yes, it's quite scary to be childless for Chinese couples.

Chinese marry not just for love but also to fulfuill their duty for their ancestors. A woman's fertility is very important. As the woman grows older, her egg cells deteriorate. Though older women can still bear children, they have less chances of getting pregnant compared to their younger counterparts. That's why Chinese women become less desirable as they age.

I'm about to reach this age where I'll be called a sheng nu if I lived in China. I'm lucky that it's quite different in Manila, but the pressure is still there. The ideal age to get married here is right after (or a few years after) college graduation. That is between 21 to 25. Filipino-Chinese, however, marry a bit later than Filipinos. Getting married around 30 is considered quite normal in my ethnicity.

What does "Filipino-Chinese" mean? Learn about the different types of Chinese in the Philippines.

I would still hear a lot of Filipino-Chinese girls, even in their early 20's, worry about being single. They would actively search for potential partners by attending events for Filipino-Chinese community and joining study tours. Some would even resort to matchmaking. They do this because of the rule that most Chinese families still practice today: marry only your own kind. They can only marry Filipino-Chinese, not Chinese from Mainland China, and not Filipinos. As if it's not hard enough to find a spouse within the small Chinese community in the Philippines, pure-blooded Chinese are even discouraged from marrying half-blooded Chinese.

I know that there are some ethnic groups that practice much stricter rules than we do. In one ethnic group in Nepal, they can only marry the person chosen by their parents. They totally lack the freedom to love. I don't want to be forced to marry someone I don't love. If that's the case, I'd rather not marry. So I still consider myself lucky even if I'm single.

You can read my Squidoo lens about Matchmaking. It's really interesting.;)

I don't know what God's plans are for me. I just try to be happy with my life, and I'll gladly accept whatever blessing He'll give me. Who says sheng nu can't live a happy and fulfilling life?

January Blues

2013-02-06T13:33:00.000+08:00

Hello everyone! I haven't been here for a while and I missed being cheerfulnuts.:) Since I got back from Christmas vacation, I've been feeling blue. Probably because of the sudden change of the atmosphere. December had been a really great month and I was kind of in denial that it was over. I thought my sadness would quickly go away, but it lingered on for the entire month. Sometimes, I would get so blue that I would burst into tears (of course I'd do this when no one is around).

It was really weird. I couldn't explain why I was feeling so depressed. All of a sudden, I just felt that I was lost, like I didn't know why I was alive. I stayed away from people, woke up very late every morning, slept very late every night, and didn't write anything for Squidoo or my blogs. I felt like I have no ability to control my life. I felt so weak, so helpless, and so useless.

I tried to cheer myself up. I watched a Taiwanese idol drama for an entire week. It did help me feel better, but after I finished the series, reality started to sink in. It made me realize that perhaps some people who watch TV all day hate their lives and want to live in another world. I felt just like that. I didn't want to live my real life.

I didn't want to think about my real life. I have too many worries. I worry about the health of my parents who grow older each day. I worry about money. I worry about being alone. I worry about a lot of things that I have no control over.

In the last few days of January, my mood somehow lifted. I started functioning again and posted my very first drama review on my Asian Drama blog. I started rereading my old entries and it reminded me how much I had enjoyed writing them. I could see my passion in my works. I don't know if I'll earn from that blog, but I'll keep adding contents to it because that is what I love doing. I have been sad and lost last month. but I'm glad to have found myself again.

I still have my worries, but I want to focus my energy on things that make me feel happy and useful. For a change, I will make this year extra special. A lot of things are stopping me from going out of my shell and exploring the world, but I will do my best to learn things and grow up.

I Don't Know What to Wear to a Party

2012-11-22T13:55:00.001+08:00

Every time I receive an invitation to wedding parties or birthday parties, I get excited. Going to parties gives me a reason to doll up myself and look pretty. Plus, I get to eat delicious foods for free! Well, not exactly free, because I have to buy a gift for the host. Anyway, as the day approaches, I would start worrying about my outfit, but I would always brush my worries off and tell myself that I still got plenty of time to prepare. When the big day finally arrives, I would sit in front of the closet and stare into nothingness. Then the fact that I have nothing to wear would sink in.

That is exactly what happened to me weeks ago. We were invited to a neighbor's wedding party. My entire family has already dressed up except for me. Cold sweat started to drip down my forehead. I rummaged through my closet and tried on different sets of outfits, only to get a thumbs down from my sister. I kept telling my mom and my sister that I don't like to become a laughing stock at the party. My sister suggested me to wear the casual-looking grey dress that I have. Having not much choice, I agreed and wore it. I stepped in front of the mirror and was shocked to see my skeletal figure. I thought that I was meatier than the person staring back at me in the mirror. Where is that great figure that I thought I have? I guess that I was just imagining it after all. I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that I was almost in tears. I asked my sister, "How come I'm so thin? I looked like a walking stick!" I could see that my sister was holding back her laughter. I looked pretty, my mom reassured me. But I didn't believe her because all moms think their children are pretty. My sister put a scarf on me to make me appear a few pounds heavier. We were almost late, so I gave up and left home feeling down. I wore a floral scarf around my neck. Now, I looked like a stick with a garland around it.

To make a long story short, I went home in a cheery mood. The food was so-so, but the band was great! Other guests were from middle-class families so I didn't feel so out of place. Despite the bad start of the day, I had fun at the party.

Next month, my family will attend another wedding party. Like before, I have no idea what to wear. I have a strong feeling that the same thing will happen again.

Touching Stories about Dolphins

2012-07-21T22:26:00.001+08:00

a mother dolphin carrying its dead offspring

Many stories claimed that dolphins had saved or helped humans in some ways. There were stories about these highly intelligent creatures helping fishermen catch fish or protecting shipwreck survivors from sharks until rescue arrived. Pelorus Jack was one of these amazing dolphins. From 1888 to 1912, he would guide travellers to safety by swimming alongside their ship as it was passing through a dangerous channel to Cook Strait. On Octocber 30, 2004 in Whangarei, New Zealand, a group of lifeguards had been swimming when a pod of dolphins swam towards them. The dolphins started circling them, which startled the four swimmers. When one of the lifeguards, Rob Howes, swam out of the circle formed by the dolphins, he saw a great white shark two meters away. It was then that he realized that the pod had been protecting them. The rescue team found them later on and brought them to safety.

In July, 2012, a video of an adult Chinese white dolphin carrying a dead baby dolphin has gone viral in the internet and was all over the news. This tear-jerking moment was witnessed by a group of people (probably tourists) at Qinzhou Sanniang Bay, a dolphin watching spot in Guangxi, China. The adult dolphin would swim under the dead baby and carry it on its back. The dead dolphin, which had a long wound on its belly, had slipped off several times from the mother’s back. The mother didn’t give up and would swim back to the sinking dolphin and replace it on its back.

I have never interacted with dolphins and have only observed them from afar in theme parks and zoos. I don’t dislike dolphins, but they aren’t my favourite animals either. That said, these stories have really touched my heart. It made me realize that even wild animals such as dolphins can sometimes think, act, and feel like humans do.

Saizen July Weekend Promo

2012-07-08T18:56:00.000+08:00

I’m a frequent shopper at Saizen, the authorized retailer of Daiso Sangyo Corp. in the Philippines. The store offers a wide collection of high-quality items. The items range from school/office supplies, accessories, toys, to kitchen utensils, snacks, and cleaning products. If you’re not familiar with Daiso, it’s a franchise of 100-yen stores in Japan. As the name implies, Daiso sells everything for 100 yen, which is around 50 pesos (or approximately $1). However, in the Philippines, Daiso products cost a little bit higher than in Japan – 85 pesos (around $2). It’s still very affordable though. Most products are imported from China. A few others are from Korea, Taiwan, and Thailand. That said, you can still find items that are made in Japan.

In my visit to the mall today, I dropped by at Saizen to buy some items for home. Despite the very low price, my bill had reached $20. The price does add up if you bought several items. After the cashier told me the total price and I got guilty (again) for buying too much, she told me I could get 2 items for FREE! I found out that Saizen is having a weekend promo for the month of July. Buy 5 items and you’ll get 1 item of your choice for free (I’ve bought 10 items). My guilt started to evaporate and I was glad to have shopped there at the right time. I just hope that I will really make use of the new things I’ve bought (and not end up hidden in the closet).

It’s Not Right: Speaking Foreign Language to Undereducated Compatriots

2012-07-04T23:45:00.002+08:00

a cool sign I've stumbled upon on Flickr.com

While waiting for my order to arrive in a middle-class restaurant, I overheard a woman speaking to a waiter in English. I could sense the uneasiness from the waiter who clearly wasn’t knowledgeable in the language. She would raise her voice a bit, asking him if he understood her. The waiter just nodded meekly.

In the Philippines, people who speak English appear to be educated, rich, or high-class. In some families, parents speak English with their kids to help them master the language. In schools, English is the medium of instruction. Some Filipinos are used to speaking English either because of their heritage (e.g. half-American) or their environment. Unfortunately, a high percentage of Filipinos only understand basic English, and not all of them are fluent.

I could not understand why this woman had to speak English to the waiter when she was actually speaking Filipino with her family members who were with her. It was not only unnecessary, but also inconsiderate and condescending.

At work, our blue-collar workers would always complain about a certain manager of a company that we had business transactions with. She would always speak English to them. Most of our men haven’t graduated from high school. Ironically, the manager speaks Filipino with her bosses, her colleagues, and the rest of the people who are more educated than our workers.

I am very blessed to have graduated from college and to know the English language. I will try to be considerate with people who can only speak Filipino fluently.

The Japanese Remake of Ghost

2012-07-03T14:52:00.001+08:00

1990

2010

The first time I’ve seen the Hollywood movie Ghost was several years ago. I was young then, and my first reaction about the movie was: “Wow, I want to be this guy (Sam Wheat). I want to be a good guy and go to heaven.” At that young age, I’ve lost a few good relatives. It feels good to know that death isn’t really the end of everything and good things do happen to good people.

I’ve watched the Ghost a few times through the years when it was aired on TV. It has always put a smile on my face. When I learned that a remake has been released by the Japanese in 2010, I was ecstatic (I’m a fan of Japanese movies and dramas)! The leads are Nanako Matsushima, a favourite actress of mine since childhood, and Song Seung Heon, the protagonist in the famous Korean drama Endless Love. You can read my review on Ghost: In Your Arms Again on my Asian Dramas and Movies Review blog.

Note: The photos are from Amazon.

How to Save Money If You're a Spender

2012-06-24T18:44:00.000+08:00

When I was a kid, I didn’t have a chance to enjoy the luxuries that most of my classmates had enjoyed. I went to a school with lots of rich kids, and I never felt that I belonged there. My family had financial problems, and our earnings were hardly enough to cover the bills. As a result, I was deprived of a lot of things during my childhood and adolescence years. Years passed and things had tremendously improved. My family now earns more. We’re not rich, but life has become much easier.

In my opinion, when a poor person becomes rich, two things happen:

He becomes ridiculously stingy
He becomes a BIG spender

read full article on The Little Girl's How to Save Blog

Jeans for Petite Women: The Little Girl’s Search for a Pair of Jeans

2012-04-26T10:00:00.000+08:00

As a skinny petite girl, shopping for clothes has always been very challenging for me. Trying on clothes has always been very disappointing. I would come out of the store feeling helpless. Most women feel very feminine doing this womanly activity; but not me. I feel like a little girl trying too hard to be a woman. It is especially difficult for me to find a pair of jeans that fits me snugly.

During one of my weekly visits to the mall, my sister coaxed me to hunt for a new pair of jeans. She complained how boyish and/or childish I looked with my existing jeans. FYI, my twin is a bit meatier than I am so it’s easier for her to find clothes that fit. We found a pair of skinny jeans and I tried it on. For the first time in my life, I found a pair of pants that actually fits.

Nowadays, you see women in skinny jeans almost everywhere. If worn right, they can flatter a skinny person’s figure. I wear mine with tops that are long enough to cover my backside. They look like leggings and can make you appear more sophisticated and more mature. Despite their being close-fitting pants, they are surprisingly comfortable to wear.

My wardrobe is full of “normal” stuff – t-shirts and jeans. Even if they look good on an average woman, they make me look far younger than my age. I realize that I have to make an extra effort to appear more mature. Sure, it’s a bit flattering to be mistaken as a college student. But being called a kid rather than a woman with a babyface isn’t very pleasant to hear. It’s time to grow up and to slowly rebuild my wardrobe.

Here are some of the brands that offer jeans for petite women:

Mango – I have a couple of them in my wardrobe. They fit me snugly around the waist but I still had to have them altered because they’re a bit too long. Each pair costs only a little over a thousand pesos when on sale.
Topshop – They really have nice skinnies that fit me perfectly! I love the feel of the jeans’ fabric on my legs. Plus, I don’t have to alter the jeans’ length! It is quite expensive though. Mine costs over Php3,000.
Giordano – My sister have one and it really looks good on her.
Zara
Dorothy Perkins
Levi’s
Guess
Blue Navy
People are People
Kamiseta
H&M
7 for All Mankind
Human – very affordable but their jeans shrink over time

It’s Not Right: Taking Too Much Food from Someone’s Lunchbox

2012-03-31T10:00:00.000+08:00

these siomai look very appetizing
Source: debbietingzon on Flickr.com

In my first job where I tutor children, I would rarely go out for lunch. The kids kept on flocking in and I got too busy to leave my table. I would bring a few pieces of huge siomai from home. They won’t make me full, but they were easier to eat and I could eat them in my seat.

In the Philippines, we have this custom of saying “kain tayo” (let’s eat) before eating in the presence of other people. It is a polite way of “inviting” other people to eat with you. Most people would just nod or give you back a smile without accepting you “offer”. So when I opened my tiny lunchbox, I told my colleagues “kain tayo”. Knowing that my lunch was not really enough for me, my male colleague declined. However, the female colleague took a piece of my siomai. I think she’d never tasted siomai before because as soon she finished her siomai, she asked me for another one. My male colleague sarcastically told this teacher not to take my food anymore because it wasn’t really enough for me. She replied with a “but I can’t really help it because it was so delicious” and took another piece. I was too shy (and too shock) to pull back my lunchbox from this middle-aged teacher.

I went home having a painfully growling stomach. It was one of the worst feelings I’ve experienced. But being shown no care by my own colleague felt much worse.

When someone offers me food, I would check first if he has more than enough for himself before taking one (or I would simply nod and give him my sweetest smile).

The Little Girl has Gained Weight: Eating and Exercising

2012-03-21T20:55:00.000+08:00

fat little girl and a lollipop

Studies have shown that watching TV tends to make you fat. Your mouth would always itch for food whenever you’re in front of TV even if you’re not really hungry. Just think of popcorn and movies. A bowlful of popcorn is a must-have in every movie night. And for someone who isn’t really fond of food, I’d also find myself bingeing while watching.

It’s always been a family habit to eat meals in front of TV. Perhaps because our apartment is cramped that everything is accessible wherever we stand or sit. My dad has been eating ice cream for dessert every night. In each visit to the grocery, he would buy three boxes. I’m not really addicted to sweets and I would always give up after a few bites. But ice cream has always been my weakness. It never fails to give me comfort whether or not I’m in front of TV. When a good movie is being aired on TV, my dad would ask for more food to satisfy his itching mouth.

After probably a month of eating ice cream, I gained a bit of weight. Being a little girl that I am, I should be happy with the additional weight. But I got mixed emotions. My tummy seems to be the only body part that has gained weight. The rest of my body is still pretty much the same. With my small frame, I look like a lollipop, the candy being in the center of the stick. My dad, on the other hand, has the widest waistline he’s ever had. From 28 inches to a whopping 32 inches. He looks like a pregnant man and we would pretend to be excited to have our nonexistent baby brother.

On a serious note, I am really worried about my dad’s health. As a busy man, eating sweets at night is his way of relaxing and recharging. I don’t feel unhealthy (probably because I’m still young), but I can’t just ignore my gradually increasing belly. I took out our old dusty treadmill hidden under the many boxes we have at home. With my sister’s help, we rearranged our apartment a bit and put the treadmill somewhere accessible. I made a goal to walk on it at least thrice a week for 15 minutes. Yes, walk, not run, because the treadmill is inclined. It is good for the hips, the thighs and the buttocks. It is a lot more beneficial if I don’t hold onto the handrail. But it’s quite impossible to do that without shaking the treadmill, so I just use one hand for grabbing the handrail while my other arm sways freely.

In addition to walking uphill on the treadmill, I also do squats and Bicycle Exercise every day to have shapelier buttocks, stronger thighs, and a firmer ab. I think a flat ab, not necessarily a six-pack ab, makes a person look fit and attractive. Of course I try to stay away from ice cream or other sweets as much as possible.

I’m not really an expert on exercising. I’m not sure if what I’ve been doing is enough to be in good shape. But I think taking baby steps is more feasible than jumping to all those complicated exercises.

So far, my dedication to a few minutes of exercise has proven its worth. I haven’t got my ideal shape yet, but my belly has stopped growing. I feel better and less lazy. I’m looking forward to having a fit body. I just hope that the rest of my family will follow suit.

It’s Not Right: Shaking Legs inside a Movie House

2012-03-10T10:00:00.000+08:00

the little girl with her dad in a movie house

My family went to a movie house one weekend. In the middle of the movie, my dad got fidgety and kept on glancing at his back. Someone sitting behind him was shaking his legs. Movie houses are a bit cramped, so it’s easy to touch the chair in front with your feet. This man didn’t want to keep his feet within his personal space and had them touching the back of my dad’s chair while shaking. It felt like being kicked at the back. Despite my dad’s giving him lingering nasty looks, the man still continued to move his legs, ignoring my very annoyed dad. As revenge, my dad tried to sit taller. His butt was literally raised from his chair so he could block as much view as possible. The man stopped shaking to shift his position, but he would go back to his leg shaking when my dad lowered his behind to his chair.

The next time I go to movie houses, I will keep my limbs within my personal space. I will try not to bother other people who are trying to enjoy a movie.

I Love Having a Nerdy Twin

2012-03-07T14:58:00.002+08:00

my nerdy twin patiently tutoring me

I will start writing about the things/people that I love. I will use the tag "I love" for these entries. My first entry is, of course, about my twin.:D

I Love Having a Nerdy Twin

I'm not a nerd. OK, maybe just a bit. My friends think so. But I remember being a happy-go-lucky kid who didn't care about books and studies. All I cared about were Barbie dolls and TV. I didn't see the point of studying because I thought that I would automatically be intelligent when I grow up. LOL, I was a silly kid back then.

My sister, on the other hand, has been studious all her life. She loves to read and loves science - a subject that I hated the most. She excelled in school and was admired by everyone because of her intelligence. I remember one time, when we were in grade school, she won a contest, and all our classmates surrounded her to admire her medal. I was happy for her, but I admit I felt a bit of jealousy.

Years passed, and she would always get higher grades than I did. People wouldn't stop comparing us. I felt l wasn't good at anything. It was a huge blow to my self-esteem. Good thing is, we have always been very close. I told her about my insecurities. She decided to tutor me. I got to ask her questions that I would never have dared to ask others for fear of being ridiculed. My twin was patient with me.

I realized the importance of hardwork. There may be people with higher I.Q. But no one is born with knowledge. Knowledge is earned. My sister's and my efforts had paid off. I started to get good grades in school, and sometimes, even higher than my twin.

Now that we no longer go to school, my sister still continues being nerdy. That's her passion. I went back to being my happy-go-lucky self. And I still care about Barbie dolls and TV.:D

The following are her nerdy blogs:

The Personal Blog of Seriousnuts

Serious Skin Care Blog

Lifestyle for a Healthy Body

All About Computers

Everything Chinese

Let’s Talk about People (my favorite!)