Cheesy, Sleazy, Must-See Movies

Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky (1991)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 07:56:00 +0000

Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky (Hong Kong/Japan, 1991) - Color, Director(s): Lam Nai-Choi
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 18]
[HK: Cat III]
Approx. 91 min.

Z-rating: 5 out of 5 stars for a most entertaining and violent movie

Cheese Factor: 4 out of 5 stars; this movie's a little heavy on the cheese

This extremely campy cult favorite is one of the most wildly entertaining movies I've ever seen. Known for it's excessive and over-the-top violence, a couple scenes have been circulating on the internet for many years now. While many people seem unable to recognize the movie by its title, almost everyone I've shown this movie to can recognize at least one or two scenes from it. For such a popular viral video, the movie that it's from is virtually unknown to the public. I find this unacceptable!!! That's like everyone quoting from the same book except no one knows the author or title of the book.... which I'm sure happens way too often as well. Anyway, I hope you brought a poncho!

In the future, all prison systems have been privatized. In the distant year of 2001, a man is sent to prison. Not just any man, Ricky is apparently the baddest motherfucker that ever lived... but we'll get back to him in a moment. We see a prison transport unload a group of new inmates to what has to be the roughest prison in the world, ruled over by the Gang of Four. A prison where captains pick on old men and if you question them about a towel, you get your face cut open with a razor!

Ricky's troubles begin when he trips the captain that falls face first into a board with nails that happened to be laying on the ground.... for absolutely no apparent reason.

In retaliation for blinding him in one eye, the captain hires an overweight assassin that is known for being extremely dangerous and violent. This drooling lard ass comes looking for Ricky after he's released from solitary confinement and finds him in the showers. He attempts to start a fight but Ricky punches him SO hard that he puts an arm through his gut, causing all of his intestines to come spilling out. When the captain tries to rush Ricky with a stabbing object, Ricky just catches it with his bare hand and crushes the captain's fingers. He punches a hole through the captain.

Ricky is pulled away by the guards and thrown into his cell where he begins meditating. We see a flashback sequence that explains why he's so powerful. Ricky already possessed superhuman strength since he was young, for no reason that's ever explained. (Although his name in Chinese means that he is #1 in terms of strength) In addition to this, his uncle taught him Qigong which turned him into an invincible superhuman warrior. Able to withstand any attack along with the ability to easily destroy solid objects.

The next day, he's taken to see the Assistant Warden who turns out to be a corrupt one-eyed bastard with a hook hand (who also seems to have an extensive porno collection). The Asst. Warden can't seem to figure Ricky out. Was he a trained killer? Or secret agent? While questioning Ricky and pushing his buttons, he makes a comment about his girlfriend that sends Ricky over the edge. In dramatic fashion, Ricky breaks the Asst. Warden's desk and throws a shadow punch at his face. The Asst. Warden's nose start bleeding though as he realizes that Ricky's attacks can hurt you without touching you.

Ricky continues to be a thorn in the side of the Asst. Warden and begins meddling in the Gang of Four's business. Things get out of hand when Ricky finds out that the Gang of Four has been growing opium. Ricky burns it all down and draws the wrath of the Gang of Four. Now with the Asst. Warden and the Gang of Four after Ricky, it seems as though his problems can't get any worse. That is, until the Warden himself returns...

Nudity: None. Unless you count male asses for all the ladies out there.

Gore: TONS! The violence and gore in this movie is so over-the-top that you can't help but laugh at how absurd it is. During the fight between Ricky and the North Cell's leader, the North Cell leader tries to commit suicide seppuku-style but tries to strangle Ricky with his intestines when Ricky tries to stop him. I'm sure everyone's seen at least one or two gory clips from this movie, floating around on the internet somewhere.

Awesome: to the MAX!!! Sure the special effects are totally cheesy and, if you're watching the English dubbed version, the dubs are terrible. That's what makes this movie so much fun! Everything is so ridiculous and over-the-top, you just can't help but laugh. This campy blood-drenched gorefest was brought to us by none other than Golden Harvest Productions. These guys are known for bringing us the best of Hong Kong action movies and this one was no exception. They really don't make movies like this anymore. This one was just pure entertainment from beginning to end. I cannot recommend this one enough! Buy a case of beer, order a pizza, and invite your friends over for movie night. This will be fun.

Top 5 Stoner Films for 420!!!

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sat, 20 Apr 2013 11:20:00 +0000

Stoners rejoice!!! Tis 4/20 again and we would like to pay tribute to all our fellow potheads here at the Z-portal. As much as we enjoy mindless entertainment, we enjoy process of becoming mindless just the same!! All lovers of Mary Jane should already be familiar with names like Cheech and Chong, the comedy duo that pioneered the stoner comedy subgenre and have since become practically synonymous with pot smoking itself. I could make a list that consisted of just their films and could even dedicate an entire post to Cheech & Chong themselves. The same goes for another comedy duo by the names of Jay and Silent Bob, two characters penned by Kevin Smith. They appear in enough movies to be in a list of their own as well, so I'm leaving all of them off, along with most pot documentaries. For the sake of some fresh picks this year, we're going for the most entertaining films that haven't been brought up in every pot conversation since the 70's. So grab a bottle Visine, roll up a fattie, and enjoy this mind-numbing Top 5 list of Z-portal's favorite Stoner films:

5. Ted (2012) - A total stoner bromance, this movie is about a guy who likes to skip work and stay home to get baked with his teddy bear. At face value, this might come off as just a silly comedy about a talking teddy bear but the plot is more about two childhood friends that grew up together. Now their friendship is being tested as they make room for new responsibilities in life. Sure, it's not a straight up stoner movie but there's plenty of gags to keep you laughing if you're stoned. Not to mention it's written and directed by Seth MacFarlane, which means there's no shortage of 80's pop culture references. Definitely recommended for fans of Flash Gordon. After smoking a heavy indica, this is a good movie to sit back and enjoy a bit of couch lock with. Bong or a pipe would be good with this one.

4. Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle (2004) - Yes, I'm sure this movie turns up on many lists of best stoner films but there's a reason for that. This perfectly follows the formula for a stoner film in my opinion. Two guys get baked and get the munchies. They have a craving for White Castle, so they set out on a mission to find some White Castle. Along the way is where they run into the adventure. Isn't that how EVERY pot story goes? You get stoned, get the munchies, and you make the mistake of leaving the house when something crazy happens to you. We've all been there. So hopefully you were smart and pre-purchased your grub this year. Go ahead and tear into your bag of Cheetos or Doritos because the munchies definitely should've set in by now. If you were really prepared, you would've picked up some burgers.

3. Your Highness (2011) - Alright, this one is a personal favorite of mine. I am a HUGE fan of the sword and sorcery genre, which could explain why I'm partial to this one. While not a full-on Scary Movie-style parody, this movie satirizes elements from sword and sorcery films while blending in stoner humor. An example is the old English that they speak in to sound more refined but every other word will be "fuck" or some variation of it. Even though it got buried by critics while it was playing in theaters, this rates very high on my list. One of my absolute favorites, I would say this is a good one to chuckle over with a group of friends after you're all high. After all the munchies, it might be time for a little recharge on that buzz you had goin'. For this movie though, you gotta smoke up with a bit of class. Break out the Hookah if ya got one! If not, your best pipe will do.

2. Half Baked (1998) - Dave Chappelle's tribute to the stoner culture, Half Baked is a classic for potheads. I hear this movie quoted and referenced more often than I care to remember. This movie also happens to be about a stoner who goes out for munchies and get caught up in a bunch of trouble. Only this guy lands himself in jail. Now his other 3 buddies must start selling pot to bail him out. There was no lack of star power behind this movie with cameos from Snoop Dogg, Bob Saget, and a ton of other famous faces. Also, who can forget the smoking session they have with "Billy Bong Thornton". Grab your favorite bong, fill it with ice, and gather your friends around... it's time to get BAKED!!!

1. Grandma's Boy (2006) - Finally, my pick for personal favorite stoner film goes to Grandma's Boy!!! This is easily one of the most quotable movies and it combines two of the best hobbies in the world: Getting high and playing Video Games!!! This video game tester gets kicked out of his apartment and has to move in with his grandmother and her roommates. Between helping around the house with chores and testing video games at work, he smokes a little pot to unwind. Since getting stoned and playing video games are a couple of my favorite hobbies, I can definitely relate to this movie on that level. With some seriously laugh out loud hilarious scenes and infinitely quotable dialogue, this is a stoner movie that ALL stoners should see. Load up the last of your herb into the bong and get ready to switch the Xbox or PS3 after this movie. You're going to want to play some fighting games with your buddies.

And that, was Z-portal's Top 5 picks for favorite stoner films. Like I said, I left off a lot of movies from this list and the top 3 movies honestly probably could've been in any order. I know a lot of stoners will be bummed for not seeing Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back or Cheech and Chong's Up in Smoke. Those are milestoner movies, they'll always get the love they deserve. So will Dazed and Confused, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, and Reefer Madness. The only movie that I do feel bad leaving off was Pineapple Express but I figured that would definitely come up in a search for stoner comedies. Perhaps one year, Z-portal can do a Top 420 list and include ALL these movies.

Marijuana use in Movies

Pot smoking is becoming more accepted in movies, from Craig T. Nelson rolling a joint in Poltergeist to Marlon Wayans being rolled INTO a joint in Scary Movie 2. As the public becomes more accepting of the medicinal uses of marijuana, we'll see it in more and more casual appearances. Sure, you'll have a movie like Evil Bong every once in awhile, where the entire movie revolves around pot and getting stoned. However, we're seeing more instances where weed isn't central to the story and it's just being casually smoked.

Idle Hands (1999) - Stoner/Horror/Comedy is I would best classify this movie. The central plot is about a kid whose hand becomes possessed and starts killing people. The kid is completely oblivious to all this and goes to get high with his buddies. I will admit that he has an awesome inhaler/pipe hanging from his neck that he smokes weed out of. I thought of converting my old inhalers into pipes but I wouldn't imagine the burning plastic tasting too good.

Leprechaun in the Hood (2000) - The fifth installment to the Leprechaun franchise sees our favorite homicidal Irish folklore go to the hood!!! There, he runs into Ice-T and smokes a joint with him. That's when our buddy Lep drops this little jingle on Ice-T:

"A friend with weed is a friend indeed, but a friend with gold is the best I'm told."

A friend indeed. What other shenanigans can you expect when there's a leprechaun in DA HOOD!!!

Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood (2003) - Not only does he go TO the hood, this leprechaun actually goes BACK as well. So this time, he's in a different hood with a different group of people. This group is just trying to hustle for money when they happen upon the leprechaun's gold. One of them is trying to sell drugs (marijuana) to get out of the hood. Another one of them is just a total stoner who trades in his share of the gold for a potato sack full of grass. The biggest twist comes when they need clovers to defeat the leprechaun and the pothead says he's been finding clovers in his weed.

Freddy vs. Jason (2003) - One of the first and one of the best crossover movies, this throwdown was EPIC for horror movie fans. Two slasher icons going head-to-head against each other. Everyone had their bets down for their favorite to win. Aside from a couple of stoners at the party they were having at the field, the scene that stands out most to me is when Freddy Krueger turns into that weird worm thing and blows smoke into the face of that Jay-wannabe pothead character. What happened to Silent Bob? Maybe he got killed back in the field by Jason.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) - On their way to Lynard Skynard concert, five youths pick up a mysterious hitchhiker that proceeds to blow her brains out inside of their van. Gravy! And so, begins the nightmare they are about to endure. So where were these kids coming from? Apparently, they just got back from Mexico with pinata full of marijuana. As if smoking pot wasn't a good enough reason to get you killed in a horror movie, this kids were trying to smuggle it!!! Guess who's not going to make it home at the end of this movie?

Friday the 13th (2009) - In the recent Friday the 13th reboot, a group of kids actually go LOOKING for Camp Crystal Lake. Are they the Scooby Doo gang trying to unravel the mystery of murders here? No, they're actually just a group of kids looking for the marijuana that supposed grows wild here. One of them actually stumbles onto the area where it's growing, only to get picked off by Jason himself. Ah, kids. What won't they do to get high?

Zombieland (2009) - Even after the zombie apocalypse, the stoners will roam the Earth. When our heroes make it to Bill Murray's house and are asked what he can get for them, we see that they want a big bowl of that sticky green bud. Of all the Earthly pleasures they could've asked for. This was just a quick scene but at least they do it big... out of a hookah! Ready the munchies cause after you watch this movie, you'll have a craving for Twinkies.

The Cabin in the Woods (2011) - Then more recently, we had a fantastic horror geek's wet dream in The Cabin in the Woods. A group of kids are headed up to an old cabin in the woods for vacation meanwhile, it seems as if their doom is being engineered. Sort of like a twisted version of the Truman Show, a group of scientists are trying to ensure that an ancient sacrificial ritual is carried out properly. The biggest wrench in their plans? A totally baked yet paranoid stoner that seems to think he's being watched. Problem is, he's absolutely right. This is one of those rare occasions where the pothead becomes the hero despite this not being a stoner film. Yeah!!! Maybe us potheads are finally getting a little respect around here. Not to mention he has that totally bad ass collapsible bong that turns into a coffee mug. This guy was totally awesome.

I hope everyone had a fun time reading this. I would like to wish everyone a Happy 420!!! Stay high, stay safe, and enjoy yourselves. I know there were tons of movies that didn't make the list, so go ahead and list your own personal Top 5 Stoner flicks in comments section. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to smoke a bowl myself. Cheers!

Evil Dead (2013)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Mon, 08 Apr 2013 07:49:00 +0000

Evil Dead (USA, 2013) - Color, Director(s): Fede Alvarez
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 18]
Approx. 91 min.

Z-rating: 4 out of 5 stars for a genuinely entertaining remake

Cheese Factor: 1 out of 5 stars because the film was serious in tone

The most anticipated remake in the horror community opened to the delight of its blood-thirsty fans. The original is one of the most famous cult films of all time and fans of the original will no doubt be tempted to pick this movie apart. This is supposed to be a re-imagining of the story rather than a shot-for-shot remake.

We follow a group of five friends who have gathered to help their friend Mia kick her drug habit. There's Olivia, who's a registered nurse, and Eric, who teaches high school. Mia's estranged brother, David, is also here to support her and he brought along a girl named Natalie. The nurse is running the show because of her medical knowledge but when they find the book, it's the high school teacher who's curious enough to decipher and read the text out loud. That unleashes the Evil but when Mia starts seeing things, everyone assumes it's just crazy withdrawal talk. They don't realize until it's too late that there's something very real stalking them in the woods and it's going to kill them one by one.

Yes, this is the D-bag that reads the book

This movie is great for a newcomer who is looking for a brutally violent scary movie or for long time Evil Dead fans. I think many will agree that this is a worthy update to a classic while still adding enough to the story to progress the franchise. Let's talk about a couple things that people are going to complain about right off the bat:

The Book - Goes by the name Naturon Demonto just like it did in the original movie but they didn't get the rights for the image so there's no face on this book. Still bound in flesh and looks pretty bad ass, just no face. Might be a big deal to some people but just looked like Leatherface's diary to me.

No Ash - Sorry, he's just not in this movie.

That's really all there is to complain about this movie. Also, if you stay until after the credits, some of that is satisfied for you anyway! I liked how good a lot of the practical effects looked but you could tell there was still some computer effects used to "touch up" certain scenes. Overall, if you're going to nitpick, I'm sure you could find things to complain about. The movie was definitely fun in its own way and I hope to see more like it. Disgusting practical effects, creepy atmosphere, dark tone with a sense of humor. What's not to like?

Nudity: Not much in the T&A department.

Gore: TONS! They don't get too creative with the kills like Laid to Rest and Laid to Rest 2 does, but they definitely went for quantity in bloodshed. With a few gruesome close ups thrown in to make you cringe in your seats.

Awesome: Very. Always nice to see a remake handled well. Despite the amount of blood that was splashed around towards the end, this movie never lost its serious tone. I really enjoyed it and I hope there are many more like it. After hearing about how the entire movie will be done with practical effects and zero CGI hype, I was mildly disappointed to see some on screen but I'm not going to complain. All of it looked fantastic, so that's just a minor complaint from me. I also won't build this movie up too much or it might not live up to the hype. I don't think it was THE best horror movie I've ever seen but I definitely think this was worth my ticket price. For the die hard fans, don't forget to stay until after the credits!!!

Bizarre Animation

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Tue, 02 Apr 2013 17:00:00 +0000

Anyone who knows me, knows that I'm a fan of bizarre animation. I even wrote a post titled Twisted Toons and Awesome Animation back when I first started this blog. I grew up adoring the strange and unusual animation of shows like Beavis and Butthead and MTV's Liquid Television. They seemed like the next logical step after watching Nickelodeon's Ren and Stimpy. Unfortunately, I don't get to enjoy sick and twisted animation as much because I hang around my little niece and nephew a lot more nowadays.

First off, I have a short here by a Canadian independent animator by the name of Nick Cross. This guy worked on the "adult" revival of Ren and Stimpy as well as other projects for Nickelodeon, Cartoon Network, etc.

He also has a blog on here at http://www.nickcrossanimation.com/ - Check him out!

Next up, we've got Felix Colgrave from the Newgrounds community. He won an award about a year ago for Movie of the Year from Newgrounds.

He's got a personal site http://aardvarkbutter.com/

But as I mentioned before, you can also find him on Newgrounds: http://masteraardvark.newgrounds.com/

Grave Encounters 2 (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Tue, 02 Apr 2013 06:35:00 +0000

Grave Encounters 2 (Canada/USA, 2012) - Color, Director(s): John Poliquin
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Approx. 95 min.

Z-rating: 2 out of 5 stars for only being mildly entertaining

Cheese Factor: 4 out of 5 stars for trying to pass the first movie off as "real"

I reviewed the first film as part of "Found Footage Week" that I dedicated the first week of Halloween to last year. I was really surprised by the film because I hadn't heard much about it before I found it during my research and was about ready to write it off as rubbish. As it turns out, aside from a few CGI effects that were thrown in and really sticks out like a sore thumb, the movie was actually decent. They built up just enough back story to give them a good reason to be there. They had a fantastic cast that played their parts really well. Even though I didn't believe that everything I was seeing was really happening, it served as a great haunted house type of movie. So of course, I was ecstatic to hear that they were coming out with a sequel. I never got around to watching it until recently....

This movie fails where the first one succeeded. Instead of a charismatic character in front of the camera, this time we've got an emo Edward Cullen-lookin' motherfucker that spends most of his time sulking in front of it. He starts off as a vlogger who just finishes rating the first Grave Encounters but is also trying to film a movie with his friends. Someone contacts him on Youtube and gives him a mysterious hint that the movie might've been real. From there, Edward starts obsessing over the movie, trying to prove to everyone that it's real. (I know his name is Alex but I'm going to call him Edward)

So Edward convinces the rest of his friends to go on a crazy trip with him to the location where the first movie was filmed. After watching the movie multiple times at home and in the hotel room, they all set off to go prove the place is really haunted. Guess what happens? They get trapped in the house just like the first crew and they're killed off one by one. What gets me is where everyone starts flippin' out and asking "What's happening?? What's going on?!" when everything starts going ape shit on them. Like they didn't just finish watching the movie about a dozen times and was expecting something like this to happen.

"In the jungle, you must wait 'til the dice read five or eight."

In an attempt to tie-in to the first movie, they bring back the original main character, who apparently isn't dead and has just been living on a steady diet of sewer rats for about 9 years. The guy acts kinda like Robin William's character in Jumanji, when he comes back to the real world after living in the game for a few years and now has the knowledge needed to explain how everything works. This guy even made a map tracking the patterns of how the rooms change!

Okay. Looks like it's safe to go inside...

I think what breaks it for me is Richard Harmon (Edward). He just looks like some MTV reality star and I don't find him particularly believable in his role. Now, in all fairness, I don't know if it was his acting or the writing but I didn't care for him before they got into the house. I understand that he was supposed to be obsessing over this movie so much that it was tearing his personal life apart, but as we saw from the beginning, Edward was more into masturbating in his room than he was hooking up with this girl at a party. He stumbles onto a couple facts randomly and suddenly he's ready to throw everything he's got into figuring out what happened to the first Grave Encounters crew. They tried to throw a "twist" ending in but I saw it coming a mile away. This sequel was uninspired and did little to further the first film. This one had a lot of momentum going for it from the first film but falls totally flat.

Funny that they reference [REC] earlier, this scene looks really familiar.

Nudity: One thing that might've scored a few extra points for the film but nope. This movie fails in the T&A department as well.

Gore: Not much gore here. A lot of the bloody scenes are actually flashbacks to the first film. I can't remember anything particular bloody or gory about this one.

"Ghost Hunting" gear, guess they should've brought a Proton Pack!

Awesome: Not. At all. This movie had the stage perfectly set up for it. I liked that they tried to make the beginning more interesting as that's usually the most boring part of any "found footage" film but that wasn't enough to save it. I also liked that they tried to do whatever they could to make the first one seem real. I just feel like you either buy into it or you don't. Those of us that don't buy into it, are immediately drawn out of the movie and end up laughing at it more than screaming. This actually had me laughing more times than it had me saying "Oh shit!" when anything happened. The scene where the weird creature thing grabs the guy through the window made me laugh out loud when he screamed like a bitch. Any mood that the original set was completely destroyed with this movie. I was actually MORE interested in seeing the movie the characters were filming than this pseudo-documentary. This one fails to create any atmosphere of its own and ends up making a laughing stock out of the movie and this "franchise". I doubt there will be a Grave Encounters 3, but if it comes out, you know I'll be watching it!

Liebster Award!

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 14:07:00 +0000

YEAH!!! Z-portal was recently nominated for a Liebster Award! What the hell is a Liebster Award exactly? Well, apparently a Liebster Award is kind of an unofficial award given to small time bloggers like myself who have under 200 followers. Just to give them a little more exposure and also encourage bloggers to keep up their hard work. So here are the rules:

Thank the person who nominated you.
Answer their 11 questions.
Nominate 11 other blogs that have under 200 followers.
Ask them 11 questions of your own.

Well, first off, I have to thank Abdul over at Run and Scream! for nominating me. I do appreciate the honor. Now, I have a few questions from him that I have to answer:

1. What is your favorite horror creature of modern times?

I wouldn't even know where to begin answering this question. I've always liked Vampires but Twilight has all but destroyed any coolness associated with them. I guess it would depend on how you define "modern times". If the cut off was the year 2000, I guess the creatures from Feast? I'm such a Creature Feature fanatic, it would be hard to pick just one. The Mist also had some pretty cool creatures in it, that really big one they seem stomping by is super creepy to me because it makes me feel so small and helpless.

2. Did you ever doze off while watching a horror movie at the cinema/home? If you did, name the movie.

I don't think I've ever dozed off watching a horror movie, but I do remember dozing off at the Tom Cruise remake of War of the Worlds. That's Sci-Fi though, so I'm not sure that really counts. Absentia bored me to tears but surprisingly didn't put me to sleep.

3. What is your idea of a perfect horror movie?

Preferably something with a lot of gore and nudity, but still something clever and fun. I don't demand too much from movies. I'm usually pretty happy with a horror movie as long as it was entertaining and kept my attention throughout the movie. (A pretty girl to look at doesn't hurt either!)

4. If you can change something about yourself, what would it be?

I'd like to be buff and totally in shape, if only to outrun zombies when the outbreak begins...

5. If you can contribute something to the community, what would it be?

A sense of humor? Everything is so damn serious nowadays, people get offended at the drop of a hat. Everyone gets so uptight about things that shouldn't really matter. People need to loosen up and learn to have a little fun. I can understand that ignorant people will always misinterpret a bad message but that's no reason the rest of us who have a brain can't enjoy our entertainment. Instead of trying to get me to be more politically correct, how about you do more to educate the younger generation? That's like telling me I can't be sarcastic anymore because 3 out of 5 people in the room don't understand sarcasm. Natural selection will eventually weed out the weak-minded, what's there to worry about?

6. Chainsaw or shotgun?

Shotgun. Definitely. As much as I would like both, I already have a bunch of machetes in my closet, so it would be nice to have a projectile weapon. I would blow those friggin' zombies back to hell!!!

7. The most underrated movie in your opinion?

Killer Klowns from Outer Space!!! Everyone wants to trash this Sci-Fi cheese-fest but I thought it was a lot of fun! Sure, the movie is downright silly but you can't deny how imaginative they got. Cotton candy cocoons, flying popcorn pods that sprout Killer Klown piranha plants, and they top it off with Klownzilla at the end?! This movie was a shit load of giggles and I would recommend giving it a fair shake if you've never seen it before. Return of the Killer Tomatoes comes in at a VERY close second.

8. Why did you start your blog?

I actually started by making custom lists on Netflix, back when Netflix still had a community, so I could easily keep track of movies that I enjoyed. Seemed like other people really enjoyed those lists too, so I kept on working on them because Netflix's recommendation system wasn't so great at the time. One day I hop on Netflix to find they had removed their community and all my lists were gone!!! I was really disappointed after having spent countless hours organizing those lists, so I decided to branch off and start my own blog instead. This way, I could still recommend and organize movies without having to worry that everything I've worked on will disappear one day.

9. Have you ever disapprove a comment?

Nope, trash talking is so common on the Internet, it's almost unavoidable. If someone disagrees with what I'm saying, it's their right to. I don't mind at all if people have an opinion that differs from mine. At the end of the day, I write because I enjoy it and I'm sure there are people out there who enjoy the movies and topics I discuss. I could care less if a hater wants to use up their time commenting on my blog and checking back for responses while driving my traffic up! The only bad press is NO press because as they say, there's no such thing as bad publicity. I have deleted comments that were obviously just spam though.

10. List 5 things you never leave home without.

Sony Xperia Play
Cell phone
Knife
Keys
Wallet

11. The best car make and model you ever bought?

Never owned a car! I'm from the city, where you can take public transportation wherever you needed to go.

======================================

With those questions answered, I get to nominate 11 other bloggers for their Liebster Award. I thought all the images used for the award were too boring, so I made my own!!! (Yes, I suck at Photoshop so I just used Paint to make the crappy award at the top of the page) But here are my 11 nominees for their Liebster Award:

Forced Viewing - http://forcedviewing.com/
Golden Vision Optometry - http://goldenvisionoptometry.blogspot.com/
2,500 Movies Challenge - http://www.dvdinfatuation.com/
Hey! Look Behind You! - http://www.heylookbehindyou.com/
Cool Target: Action Movie Reviews - http://cooltarget.blogspot.com/
Cine-Apocalypse - http://www.cine-apocalypse.com/
Kung Fu Fridays - http://kungfufridays.blogspot.com/
achillesgirl in action land - http://achillesgirl.blogspot.com/
Improvised Cooking - http://muffindoctor.blogspot.com/
Stalk n Slash - http://stalknslash.blogspot.com/
80's Horror Movies - http://80shorrormovies.blogspot.com/

And here are your 11 questions:

1. What's your favorite film genre? (You can narrow it down to a sub-genre if you'd like)

2. How did you get your start in blogging?

3. What is your goal, if any, with your blog?

4. Outside of blogging, what are some of your other hobbies?

5. What was the biggest event, TV show, book, or any major influence on your childhood that shaped you into the person you are today?

6. If meeting you for the first time, what would be the proudest quality about yourself that you would like any other person to know?

7. If you could be stranded on a deserted island with one celebrity of your choice, who would it be and why?

8. If you suddenly became a billionnaire tomorrow, what kind of company would you own or what would you be known for doing? (After you buy the new house, cars, and had your fun shopping of course)

9. If you could only eat one type of cuisine for the rest of your life, what would that be?

10. What is your biggest fear in life?

11. Finally, dig down deep for this one, what is the most embarrassing thing you've ever had happen that you would NEVER have posted on your blog... if you weren't answering these questions??

I would also like to encourage any of the 11 bloggers I chose (with Photoshop experience) to create their own image for the Liebster Award because there is a serious lack of awesome images for it. Hope you guys all have fun with this!!!

Dead Sushi (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Fri, 22 Feb 2013 00:09:00 +0000

Dead Sushi (Japan, 2012) - Color, Director(s): Noboru Iguchi
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Approx. 92 min.

Z-rating: 4 out of 5 stars for zany Japanese craziness

Cheese Factor: 5 out of 5 stars for one of the most bizarre plots I've heard in awhile

"Dafuq did I just watch?!?" is the only question going through my mind at the moment as I reflect on this movie that I had been DYING to see. Noboru Iguchi, director of other Japanese movie madness such as Machine Girl and Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead, is at it again with this movie about an outbreak of killer sushi. Be warned, this type of movie is NOT for everyone. I'm sure a lot of people won't get it and will just write it off as a bad movie.

I am not trying to call this a good movie by any means, I just don't think it's a particularly bad one. This movie is purposely cheesy (and sleazy!) with a ridiculous plot about killer sushi that spreads its infection much like a zombie virus. The ridiculous part? This sushi can fly for some reason... whatever. If you're willing to ignore common sense and just accept that killer sushi can fly, this movie is actually a lot of fun. Really stupid fun, but fun nonetheless. Their creator is a vengeful research scientist that was wrongly jailed for a crime he did not commit. The story really revolves around a cute daughter of a sushi chef who happens to working the night that killer sushi attacks the restaurant. In addition to knowing all about sushi, she also seems to be well-versed in martial arts. To make a long story short, the vengeful research scientist unleashes the killer sushi on a night where the girl happens to be working as a waitress before injecting himself and turning into a giant killer fish. Yes, it's one of those types of movies.

Nudity: There's only one scene with nudity that I can remember. The boss of the company is running from the killer fish and hides in a women's shower. A girl comes in and proceeds to bathe while completely oblivious to his presence. Another great scene that I can remember is where a piece of killer sushi was in the process of eating a chick's tongue out of her mouth, a guy is just standing there deciding whether or not he should cop a feel since she's probably going to be dead soon. I'm sure every guy has pondered this scenario at least once in their lifetime.

Gore: A lot of it was CGI gore, which means most of it is poorly done. The scenes that did have practical effects were alright. Not particularly convincing, but you don't watch these kinds of movies for their special effects anyway! I was a little surprised to find that this movie wasn't overly gory. Considering the director and the potential for over-the-top gore with a story about killer sushi, I was surprised the gore factor is so low in this one!

Awesome: Definitely!!! But only if you're into this type of movie. As I said before, this movie will probably be lost on most people and probably be written off as "too weird" or "bad", which really sucks because this movie is a lot of fun. People who enjoy this type of bizarro film will no doubt find it funny. My biggest complaint was that I wasn't prepared for how much CGI was actually going to be in this movie. I feel like the bad CGI will be the biggest reason for people to write this film off as a bad movie. Sure, it's low-budget garbage, but it's still fun!!! I mean, the girl busts out sushi nunchaku at the end of the movie, were you expecting a great drama? For a silly movie, the choreography was decent and really stylishly filmed. (Better than ANY fight scenes from Christopher Nolan's Dark Knight trilogy)

The zombie sub-plot kinda reminds me of Stacy: Attack of the Schoolgirl Zombies but the whole movie kinda reminded me of Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl overall. I would recommend this movie if you're a fan of movies like Sukeban Boy, RoboGeisha, or Tokyo Gore Police. Definitely made me hungry for some sushi afterwards!!!

Paranormal Activity 4 (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 11:27:00 +0000

Paranormal Activity 4 (USA, 2012) - Color, Director(s): Henry Joost & Ariel Schulman
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 15]
Approx. 88 min.

Z-rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Cheese Factor: 2 out of 5 stars

This movie was pretty creepy. Now, when I say creepy, I don't mean that the movie was scary. I mean that I felt creepy watching it. I'm sure it doesn't help that I'm a guy, watching a 16 year old girl through what feels like a webcam while she sleeps. There's plenty of shots from the ground where you're just staring at her feet (for you foot fetishists out there!) and there's even a scene where she's in a towel like she just got out of the shower. How are you NOT supposed to feel like a peeping tom when you watch this movie?! I already reviewed the other Paranormal Activity movies for Halloween last year and I have to say that I really enjoyed watching them back-to-back. In fact, I dedicated the first week of October to found footage films and I might've played out the genre a little bit. This movie follows the exact same formula that the other films had without really bringing anything new to the table.

This is mom, but still such a pervy voyeur shot!!!

The plot of this movie follows the events that take place after Paranormal Activity 2, where Katie comes and abducts the baby at the very end of the movie then walks out the front door. Fast forward a couple years and they're moving in next door to a new family. The family consists of two estranged parents on the verge of a divorce, a hottie blonde daughter, and a young son. The hottie teenage daughter is played by Kathryn Newton, who looks like she'd be one of the popular girls in high school. Katie also claims to not be feeling well and asks the family to watch her "son" since the two boys get along so well. The daughter chats with her boyfriend through webcams and because he "accidentally" recorded her sleeping all night, they start to notice weird things happening around the house since the new neighbors moved in.

The only "scary" scene I could find

The rest of it plays out pretty much like the usual Paranormal Activity formula, the demon starts by knocking small things over like books and stuff. Then slowly graduates to bigger and stranger occurrences until it's too late to do anything about it. I think that a fourth movie of the EXACT same formula is a little dull. They could've tried to surprise us with something new, seeing as one of the tagline for this movie was "All the Activity has led up to this". I was expecting something epic to happen in this one. This movie plays out kinda like both 2nd and 3rd story put together. The only thing that was somewhat new was how the movie centered around the teenage daughter mostly. She's the one that notices the strange events taking place and she's the one that has her boyfriend set up the cameras in the house to record everything. Also, a lot of this movie seems to be about watching her. If I didn't know any better, this was the start of Paranormal Activity porn parody. "There's a demon in my house, quick, record me sleeping in my underwear!" (Fuck me, right?) I mean, look at these posters!!!

Someone should change the title to "Brazzers"

Nudity: None, that would've turned this whole movie into a porno. Not to mention the fact that the main girl is underage and it would've been highly illegal, the whole movie already felt like some sort of strange voyeur cam porno.

He's probably considering coping a feel...

Gore: Sadly, none. Some gore probably would've helped this franchise seeing as they really needed to do something to break away from the same tired old formula. I'm not completely against movies that follow a formula, I was a big fan of the Friday the 13th movies where teenagers will get naked and have sex before getting murdered in brutal fashion. That's all in fun, so it's okay if the plot is a little mindless. This franchise can't just keep following the exact same formula every movie because it's a found footage film. Found footage films always have to start off with at least a half hour of watching someone's "home movies" before anything really happens. Well, seeing as this is the fourth film in this series, we already know what's going to happen. So show it to us already!!!

At least they tied in the story somewhere in the middle of this

Awesome: Pretty awesome, but not very. Was nice to have a pretty young lady to look at for a change (no offense to Molly Ephraim who plays Ali in Paranormal 2) but the plot is really getting played out. No matter how you cut it, they should've done more with this one to really surprise the audience. That's not to say this was a bad movie, you'd probably enjoy this one if you enjoyed the other ones. Sometimes, people are looking for the same formula in a movie because it feels familiar and is the whole reason they fell in love with the series to begin with. I can only speak for myself when I say that I wish they did more with this fourth one because that would've escalated the franchise as a whole. First one introduces the franchise, second one escalates it with a bigger family, third one goes back and explains the origins, and the fourth one comes back to present day and really pushes the envelope. Due to the fact that they didn't take a chances and totally played it safe with this film, I doubt there would be as much buzz for the Paranormal Activity 5. Oh, you know they're going to make number 5. I gave this movie a higher score because I did like the other movies and I didn't want people to think I hated this movie. Overall, I liked it about as much as I liked the others, but I think this franchise is past it's peak and it'll be all downhill from here. What I didn't get was the night that the boy went into her room and she floated into the air, did she just forget to watch the video the next day? Seems like she was completely unaware that it happened. Also, it doesn't help that the Paranormal Activity trailers tend to lie and have scenes that aren't in the movie.

Misc Updates and Short Reviews

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Mon, 21 Jan 2013 14:41:00 +0000

Yeah, it's very apparent that daily updates aren't going to happen but I'll try to do every other day or at least weekly updates if I can. I'm sure I'll have plenty of time to do that since I'm leaving my day job. Might be unemployed for a bit, so I'm sure the amount of updates will increase!

Another reason I haven't been able to update is that I don't have much to say at the moment. Other than the Evil Dead remake, which I've written two different posts about, there haven't been many horror movies or violent movies that I'm really looking forward to seeing.

I did see Django Unchained in theaters, and like most others, really enjoyed the film. I didn't feel the need to write my own review and use the controversy surrounding the film to fuel my own popularity on this blog. I saw it, I really enjoyed it, and I would recommend it to anyone who enjoys quality entertainment. If you're one of those people who feel the need to join a group of activists because of how this movie exploits black people and slavery, then you need to fuck off because you're missing the point entirely. I don't feel the need to "defend" this movie as it is simply that. A movie. I didn't come out of the movie calling every black person I saw a "nigger" nor did I feel the need to whip any of them as they walked by. I didn't feel like I wanted to call them "boy" or lord over them in any way. Those of you who get SO worked up over a movie just have nothing better to do in their lives. Go get laid and take a chillaxative, you motherfuckers are entirely too anal retentive.

Another thing that's been keeping me busy is the fact that I've on this Tokusatsu and Pro Wrestling hype lately. I picked up two Kamen Rider DVDs lately and a crapload of wrestling DVDs highlighting the careers of greats such as Eddie Guerrero, Mr. Perfect (Curt Hennig), Road Warriors Hawk & Animal, plus many more!!! Used to be, everything I was watching or researching would go up on this blog but I'm trying to sort my interests so I can keep my blog s separate. Like I've explained before, anything horror related or is geared more towards Adults will be posted here. Otherwise, more lighthearted subjects such as video games and comic books will go onto The Retrospective Geek blog.

I saw Mama recently and wasn't impressed. I love that fact that Guillermo Del Toro is out there supporting independent filmmakers but just from the audience's perspective, I felt that the movie was definitely lacking. I have to admit, I wasn't exactly excited for this movie after watching the trailer (mostly because I didn't get it, was Mama a ghost or a monster?) but gave it a chance to impress me when I was at the theater. One of my biggest gripes about Mama (who turns out to be a ghost) is that there isn't enough backstory on her. Sure, they give you just enough to keep the story moving forward but you never really care about Mama and what she went through. The movie focuses more on the two little girls and their relationship with a surrogate mother in the form of their uncle's girlfriend. She wasn't prepared to have any children but stuck by her love and did her best to protect these children. I was more interested in their story and would rather have seen a movie about them instead. What we get is a Mama character who seems haphazardly thrown into the story. There's no reason Mama should be as powerful as she is. A spirit is stronger if a person goes through great emotional trauma before death. Even though Mama's shown going through this trauma, we're never invested in her enough to care. That is where the biggest problem lies in this movie. They had a fantastic cast, the kids were great, but the character Mama is never really developed. I feel like a good horror movie should have a good villain. That's where this film misses and is the biggest reason I think this one can be skipped until the DVD's release.

Another movie that I saw recently was A Haunted House. I got excited for this movie the moment I saw the trailer because I thought this was going to be another Scary Movie. The only funny Scary Movies to me were the first two, and those were the only ones that the Wayans brothers were in. When I saw that Marlon Wayans was involved in this movie, I decided that I had to go see this one for myself. I enjoy the movie but I definitely think that Scary Movie was funnier. There were a lot of "gay" jokes and the humor is pretty sophomorish but that was part of the fun! I saw a lot of the movies they were parodying and I got most of the references, I just feel like this is going to do better after its release on home video. Cedric the Entertainer is absolutely fuckin HILARIOUS in this movie and I think he had the best lines. The movie was very enjoyable but I get the feeling that it will be more fun if you could rent it and make jokes with your friends while watching it. Overall, a fun movie with a couple good laughs. I liked it but I definitely believe it will do better after its DVD or Blu-ray release. (This is NOT the type of film you need on Blu-ray)

Another Evil Dead Update!

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 06 Jan 2013 19:13:00 +0000

Now that I'm running two blogs, it takes me longer to write more in-depth posts. Part of that is because I'll start researching for the post, find something else that interests me, then end up going off on a tangent and wasting many hours just surfing from one link to the next. So rather than take weeks to finish up one post and have the blog sit idle, I'll try to fill it with daily short posts with small updates of info I've come across but haven't had time to compile into a bigger post.

First small update comes from the guys over at Horror-Movies.ca confirming there will be absolutely NO use of CGI in the upcoming Evil Dead remake that's slated for a release in April. I'm not usually one to get all worked up over a remake but (since the release of the full red band trailer) I know what I like when I see it. Much like Piranha 3D, I knew I wanted to see it the moment I saw the trailer. Check out the red band trailer for yourself:

I'm already sold purely based on the fact that they're using all practical effects for this movie. I don't mind an updated version of a classic for new audience, it just has to be a sincere attempt to recapture the magic of the original with a new spin on it. The remakes pumped out by big studios simply to cash in on a franchise's popularity is fucking garbage. I'm already excited for this one as it seems like it's being handled well.

I saw Django Unchained awhile back, probably not going to review it, but I would highly recommend it for anyone who likes Quentin Tarantino, Westerns of any kind, and anyone who's just looking for a good time. Most of the action is at the end but the movie is filled with QT's signature interesting dialogue and storytelling. I would probably say that Django Unchained and The Man with the Iron Fists were my favorite movies at the theaters this year. If I ran a movie theater, I would show both of these movies in a double feature for about a week after it's pulled from other theaters. This would give anyone who missed its first run a chance to catch it still, plus I think this double bill would be totally fuckin awesome together.

I'm working on a longer post and some reviews for this blog, but lately I've been on the Retrospective Geek blog because I've been on a Tokusatsu hype lately. Remember to check in on this blog and the other one cause I'll be posting to whichever I finish first!!! While I work on the longer posts, I'll try my best to fill both blog with shorter daily updates so there's always something fresh (or rotten) to see when you come visit.

Evil Dead Remake

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 23:36:00 +0000

Been meaning to update for awhile, just hard to find the time to finish up posts but I've got a ton of "works in progress" just waiting to be finished up. I decided to do a quick post today about the Evil Dead remake coming up.

I first heard about an Evil Dead remake years ago, the project was still in development hell last time I checked on it. Then around October, while writing all those horror reviews, I came across a Red Band trailer and found that the movie was nearly complete! I'm usually a bit skeptical about remakes and especially if the source material is something so loved as Evil Dead in the Cult movie community, they're going to be fighting an uphill battle with this one. Ignoring the fact that this is a remake, withOUT Bruce Campbell at that, the Red Band trailer actually looked.... pretty fucking bad ass!!! Worth checking out? I definitely think it's worth a peek.

Not bad if you ask me!!! Looks like it'll be pretty bad ass, I'm excited to see it. The movie comes out in theaters April of 2013, you better believe that I'll be there!!! I just wanted to do a quick post on this because I'm such a fan of the original movies and because I woke up to this picture in my Facebook stream this morning

The above artwork is by Rick Melton, who has a website http://www.stunninglysavage.com/

Be sure to check out more of his amazing work!!!

Who says "FUCK" better?

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Thu, 06 Dec 2012 16:35:00 +0000

For YEARS the man depicted above was practically synonymous with the word "Muthafucka". Nobody in the business dropped the F-bomb better than good old Sam Jackson. And while I'm sure he's FAR from being dethroned, I've found a new contender for best F-bomb laid in a movie: Chow Yun Fat in A Better Tomorrow II (1987)

Okay, so that alone is probably not enough to win him any titles from Sam Jackson... but it sure was funny as hell!!! I love the intensity of the scene building up to that moment where he switches from Cantonese to English just for emphasis. But let's face it, no one will say it better and more often than the man himself, Samuel L. Jackson.

The Man with the Iron Fists (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Thu, 08 Nov 2012 12:37:00 +0000

The Man with the Iron Fists (USA & Hong Kong, 2012) - Color, Director(s): RZA
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 18]
Approx. 95 min.

Z-rating: 5 out of 5 stars for an outrageously entertaining kung fu flick

Cheese Factor: 3.5 out of 5 stars for all kung fu genre references made throughout the film

This movie wins my vote for the most entertaining movie of the year!!! Sadly, I'm afraid it will be overlooked as certain audiences will not understand the references to other movies within the genre. If you are a fan of old Shaw Brothers films and old school Kung Fu movies in general, I highly suggest you go support this movie!!!

This throwback to the bloody days of Kung Fu movies has a story that is set in a world carefully crafted for over two years, by The RZA and director Eli Roth, down to the finest detail. The RZA is a freed slave who works as a blacksmith in Jungle Village. There are many different clans at war with one another, forcing the blacksmith to create weapons for them to fight each other with. Gold Lion, a reference to a character steeped in Wudang myth, promises a government official that the Lion Clan will oversee the protection of a large shipment of gold passing through Jungle Village. The leader, Gold Lion, is betrayed by Silver (Byron Mann) and Bronze (Cung Le) Lion who are ready to go to war with the other clans and ambush the gold delivery. Rumors of the gold's presence in Jungle Village attract thieves, bandits, assassins, and mysterious characters of all kinds. The lid blows off when the gold finally arrives and everybody goes to war over it.

I absolutely LOVED this movie. Lots of fun and great for Kung Fu genre geeks! When this movie starts, Quentin Tarantino does a quick intro and they play an exclusive trailer for QT's new movie Django Unchained. Already, that got me excited! Then the movie starts off with title screens that look straight out of an old Shaw Brothers movie, with the Chinese calligraphy and all. Any genre fanboy should have a stiffening rod stirring in their pants at this point that could easily be mistaken for a bo staff. All the weapons and costumes of each of the different clans are all elaborately designed. There are interesting new concepts mixed in with genre favorites such as a Brass Body character (played by Dave Bautista) that is reminiscent of the Invincible Body techniques seen in movies like the Five Deadly Venoms and Warriors Two. The movie is scored by RZA himself, featuring tracks with excerpts from old Wu Tang Clan songs. Also, keep an eye out for cameos by old school martial arts movie stars such as Leung Kar-Yan and Gordon Liu as well as modern day celebrities like MC Jin.

Nudity: while there was no graphic nudity shown in the movie, there are a lot of references to sexual acts being performed. In fact, a great deal of the story takes place in a brothel. Still, there are VERY beautiful girls all over this movie and they're all a pleasure to look at.

Gore: There are some gruesome and bloody moments like a guy's eyeball getting punched out of his head. A guy gets his arms ripped part way off by Cung Lee in the first 5 minutes of the movie!!! All these screenshots were taken from movie's official website and do not belong to me. Otherwise, I would've gotten some of the gorier scenes in the pictures. You should really be seeing it for yourself anyway.

Awesome: to the MAX!!! This is the type of fun that I expect to have at the movies. Uncompromising, gory, Kung Fu goodness. Trying to catch all the references was a lot of fun too. The Gold Lion character for example, I'm pretty sure, is a "nod" to the character from the novel The Heaven Sword and the Dragon Saber that inspired movies such as Kung Fu Cult Master, which also featured different clans with their particular styles. A story that heavily involves characters from a sect of the Wudang, which we all know is where the Wu Tang Clan derives their name from. During the final battle sequences, we see a fight between Silver Lion and Gold Lion's son that directly references Bruce Lee's final fight scene in Enter the Dragon. Also, the secret to defeating Brass Body is almost directly lifted from the Warriors Two movie. Not that I'm accusing this movie of stealing anything, this is just a labor of love created by a very obvious fan of the genre for fellow fans of the genre. If you've enjoyed any of the films mentioned in this review or any others in the genre, please go support this movie. Completely original films made with this level of passion are becoming rare and hard to come by nowadays. The action is fast paced, the camerawork is stylized, and it perfectly captures the essence of the old Kung Fu film they're throwing back to. Go support this film so we can have many more like it!!!

Wrestlemaniac (2006)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 04 Nov 2012 19:03:00 +0000

Wrestlemaniac (USA, 2006) - Color, Director(s): Jesse Baget
MPAA Rating: NR
[UK: 15]
Approx. 75 min.

Z-rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars for failing in the wrestling aspect

Cheese Factor: 5 out of 5 stars for self aware cheese

From the title, you can probably guess that this movie is going to be terrible. And you would be right! Knowing this, I went into the movie with extremely low expectations. The story is that a group of people are in a van driving through Mexico to film a porno. They somehow end up where "El Mascarado" is and they start getting picked off one by one. There's some filler story in there somewhere too but as usual, no one cares. We're here to watch a masked Mexican wrestler kill people with his bare hands and rip their faces off after he defeats them. (Symbolic of removing the mask of a luchador and disgracing him after defeat) I would've LOVED this movie if it featured a character that performed deadly versions of wrestling moves. I think that's what everyone essentially expects from a movie like this but I was disappointed to find only very basic wrestling moves were used in this movie. I think I saw a backbreaker (unoriginal), bearhug, and a splash from the top of a barrel. I think it'd be hard to even find a clothesline or a drop kick.

The concept is pretty simple and easy to follow. The killer is played by Rey Mysterio Sr. (The uncle of Rey Mysterio Jr.) they finally figure out that the way to beat him is to remove HIS mask and then he can't show his face in public again. The problem is they can't overpower him so they have to find a weapon to use against him. This is the part that frustrates me the most, I think the first thing I would've picked up was a steel chair. Instead they go for a 2x4 with huge nails sticking out of one end. (That's not even a wrestling weapon!!) If they wanted the 2x4, they could've wrapped it barbed wire instead. They eventually all die and no one makes it out alive, don't bother seeing this one. You'll just be wasting your time.

Nudity: This was the typical horror formula of boobies and violence. There was a surprisingly lack of nudity for a couple of guys trying to film a porno. Not really a major complaint though because I was looking for the wrestling more than the nudity.

Gore: The gore in the movie was simple, which I liked. I don't know if this movie would've had the budget to go all out in special effects, so I'd rather it be used sparingly than have it be poorly done. The parts when the wrestler rips off the faces is actually pretty gruesome and looks good.

She even touches the chair! What a tease...

Awesome: This movie really had the potential to be so much better. The only complaint that I really have is about the lack of actual wrestling moves in the movie. This definitely incorporated more Slasher elements than they did Pro Wrestling. For example, how they don't show the killer right away to help build suspense like the shark in Jaws. I liked that he had face nailed to his wall, that was pretty bad ass. Other than that, he's just a crazy ass wrestler that started killing people... why hasn't the police or anyone tried to stop him before? There's just a crazed, violent luchador on the loose and everyone just dismisses it as legend? Sure. Why not! If you like ridiculously outrageous movies where you just can't help but laugh when you think about the story, this one's for you.

Orphan (2009)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Thu, 01 Nov 2012 05:32:00 +0000

Orphan (USA, 2009) - Color, Director(s): Jaume Collet-Serra
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 15]
Approx. 123 min.

Z-rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars for a surprisingly bone chilling movie

Cheese Factor: 1 out of 5 stars for trying to make me scared of a little girl... and succeeding.

This girl will DESTROY you...

I have to admit, I hesitated to buy this even though it was on sale at Walmart for only $4. I didn't want to waste my money if the movie turned out to be a dud. Well, let me tell you, this is probably the scariest movie I've seen about a scary little girl since Hard Candy. For some reason, the idea of a highly intelligent, manipulative, and murderous little girl is deeply disturbing to me. When you watch as many of these horror movies as I do, you just get a bit desensitized to them after awhile and they're not terrifyingly scary anymore. You still get a thrill from watching it but you're just less likely to jump at every scare attempt. This movie was just the right formula I guess, because this little girl gave me that chill down my spine and made me feel like I might lose control of my bladder.

You just fucked up...

Isabelle Fuhrman perfectly plays the role of Esther, a mysterious and honestly quite scary little girl with a dark secret. On the outside, she's very sweet and proper but will become murderously violent if you get on her bad side. The way the story builds, you can see that she is highly manipulative and is constantly plotting. She's got a wide array of skills at her disposal such as understanding sign language, having a way of earning trust and sympathy from people, and thinking quickly on her feet. She starts developing an Electra complex, which we later find out she seemingly has a history of, and so begins her rivalry with "Mommy". Esther begins to ruin mother's credibility and soon sets her up to look like an alcoholic with a problem. The ending is fantastic as we find out the truth of Esther's past. I thought she was scary from the beginning but towards the very end, that's the kind of stuff nightmares are made of...

Nudity: None. Perv. There is one scene where the boys are hanging out in the treehouse when one of them busts out a porno mag and they're shown flipping through it.

Gore: Not overly gory but still packs a surprising punch. Very effective use of violence and blood where necessary.

Awesome: VERY. I laugh now when I think back to how I hesitated to buy this at first, thinking it might not be scary. The story is great, Isabelle does an incredible job of playing Esther to the point where it's just terrifying, and I found it to be very scary and original. The coolest thing was Esther's art, with glow-in-the-dark paint. Coolest thing I've ever seen! This is also another Dark Castle film!!! These guys seem pretty popular with me this year.

Piranha 3DD (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 18:31:00 +0000

Piranha 3DD (USA, 2012) - Color, Director(s): John Gulager
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 18]
Approx. 83 min.

Z-rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars for purely mindless fun and entertainment

Cheese Factor: 4 out of 5 stars for the B-movie grade cheese

I guess I should've called the review Piranha DD, since I've only seen the 2D version of it on DVD. I was really looking forward to watching it on the big screen but was bummed to find that it wasn't playing at any theaters near me. If you've seen any the Feast movies that I recommended for Halloween 2010, then you should be pretty familiar with the type of humor expected from a John Gulager film. A purely exploitative trashfest featuring memorable lines of dialogue like, "Josh cut off his penis because something came out of my vagina."

The story here is that a new water park is opening up for the summer and it's going to feature "water-certified" strippers. The asshole (played by the actor I hate most, David Koechner) that owns the place is pumping his chlorine treated water out into the lake, which is attracting the piranha who are looking to spawn. Christopher Lloyd is back to explain that the piranha, affected by the chlorinated water, are confusing the water park for their spawning grounds. A marine biologist, played by Danielle Panabaker (Friday the 13th and The Crazies remakes), rushes back to her step-father that runs the water park and tries to warn him of the danger but he refuses to close the park on the opening day. Once the piranha arrive, it's absolute chaos as the water runs red with blood.

Nudity: With a title like "DD" what do you expect? Of course it's going to be a mindlessly entertaining movie that is filled with tons of nudity and sophomoric humor. My biggest complaint is that I didn't see this movie in 3D, my favorite scene from the original was when the two babes were swimming around each other complete nude in the water. Watching that in 3D was so beautiful, I really wish I saw this one in 3D too. Unfortunately, it didn't seem like this one had as much nudity as the first.

Gore: There was plenty of gore in this movie too, unfortunately though, still not as much as the first movie!!! The cheesy humor and B-movie goodness was definitely there, no doubt. There is some gore but not as much, or as well done, as the first movie.

Awesome: Pretty damn awesome. If this were a standalone film, I think it would be rated a lot higher. The problem is that it's overshadowed by it's predecessor. A lot of people actually bashed this movie when it first came out. I think that the movie is a lot of fun and a decent sequel. Ving Rhames is hilarious as always, there are a couple other cameos that are pretty funny too. This is just an all around fun movie that is very entertaining if you just sit back and let it entertain you. Sure, it's no Piranha 3D, but it's still a damn fun movie. (I don't know that anything can match how awesome the original was!)

ChromeSkull: Laid to Rest 2 (2011)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 06:01:00 +0000

ChromeSkull: Laid to Rest 2 (USA, 2011) - Color, Director(s): Robert Hall
MPAA Rating: R
Approx. 93 min.

Z-rating: 4 out of 5 stars for a totally bad ass sequel to a totally bad ass movie

Cheese Factor: 2 out of 5 stars

ChromeSkull ink!

This movie picks up right where the first one leaves off. The survivors from the first movie are just leaving as a team of people move in. Just like MiB, these guys are the clean up crew that came to scoop up the pieces of ChromeSkull and try to put him back together again. These guys talk about protocol like they're part of some large organization. Really strange for a killer to be part of a network. While the original ChromeSkull is out, this other dirtbag from the organization tries to step up and finish off the survivors. This really enrages CS when he gets the news. I'm not sure what this mysterious organization is but Danielle Harris seems to be one of the ladies in charge. They tempt CS out of his hospital bed with a new girl and he's quickly back into action, showing that other douche how it's really done. CS is apparently the man running the show cause he has the power to fire that other dude, causing him to "snap" then shave his head and trying to don the chrome mask. Before he was kicked out of the organization, he commissioned a team to create a giant throwing star-like weapon that has the signature ChromeSkull blades at the end of it. When the two finally meet, it becomes immediately clear... there can be only ONE!!!

Okay, so the story focuses a little more on the girl but nobody really cares. We're all here for the gore and the violence!!! And they deliver all that in spades. I like that they were so ambitious with the storyline. There's a story going on about a girl who's going blind and is trying to survive this nightmare that she's in, there's another about an internal power struggle between two people who want the same position within an organization, and it's still a Slasher film all at the same time.

Nudity: Doesn't show much more than the first but at least there's a shower scene in the first 10 minutes of the movie. Gotta give them credit for trying!

Gore: Tons. There's buckets of this stuff. Definitely the centerpiece of this slasher double feature. While I loved the original Hatchet, I thought the sequel went downhill as far as the special effects. I'm not sure if it was a budget issue or what, but I know I didn't enjoy it nearly as much as the original. This is top notch gore from the beginning of the series to the very end. I am very much a fan of the special effects in this series, provided by Almost Human Inc. (A special effects company owned by the director, Robert Hall)

Awesome: Very. I really enjoyed this series even though it wasn't anything groundbreaking. The special effects are amazing and that's really what you're watching it for. These two movies should be shown in a double feature at any Halloween party. I consider this to be part of the new wave of Slashers, I just wish more people were aware of good ol' ChromeSkull...

Laid to Rest (2009)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 06:00:00 +0000

Laid to Rest (USA, 2009) - Color, Director(s): Robert Hall
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 18]
Approx. 90 min.

Z-rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars for a totally original and gory as hell Slasher

Cheese Factor: 2 out of 5 stars for bad acting and bad dialogue

Laid to Rest is a very original horror movie. I had heard a lot about this movie when it was releasing but was never interested enough to sit through it. Something about it really put me off and I think it's what put most people off this movie. The killer with a chrome mask that calls himself ChromeSkull sounded like it'd be too lame of a concept to actually work. Well if everyone's always complaining about remakes and how Hollywood recycles old movies without coming up with any new ideas, why weren't more people supportive of this movie? The guy dresses like he's in MiB and walks around with a camera attached to his shoulder like a parrot. He looks like some sorta tech pirate walking around with two big ass knives carving up pretty girls. What's not to love?

After an incredibly gory opening credits montage of girls being cut up and open, the movie starts off with some chick waking up to find herself locked in a casket. (Interesting way to start a movie!) She finds her way into the next room and tries to call for help. This is where you first get a sense that there's something wrong with her, like maybe she has brain damage from being locked in the casket for too long. When she peaks out the door, she sees a man wearing a chrome mask in the form of a skull. This is the first time we see our killer.

Now, he's not your average slow moving dumb beast of a killer. Aside from his attire, he drives around in a nice car with vanity plates and carries a chrome briefcase with him that has medical supplies as well as the glue he needs for the mask. YES!!! This killer will stop in mid-kill just to reapply his mask before continuing to kill. I thought that was absolutely hilarious.

The rest of the film just involves the girl trying to survive and everyone around her becoming a victim of this lunatic. The acting in this movie is mediocre and the lines of the girl with head trauma is just downright annoying. I understand that she's supposed to be have brain damage, but the way she talks drove me absolutely insane the first time I watched this movie. Also, why does every computer they use look like it's running Windows 95? The gore effects are what really steal the show. As cheesy as the rest of the movie might seem, the gore is top notch and is pretty brutal to look at. And in any Slasher film, the star should really be none other than the gore effects. I give them kudos for getting that right.

Nudity: The other half of the equation that seems to be missing here. Whenever I think Slashers, I always think piles of dead bodies and boobies. Where are the boobies?

Gore: The gore effects in this movie are FANTASTIC. Absolutely top notch. Like I said before, they absolutely steal the show. I love that he walks around with two big ass knives and just cuts people into pieces. ChromeSkull is such a bad ass.

Awesome: Totally. Definitely one of the better slashers to come out recently. The last movie I saw with effects of this quality was Hatchet (2006), which is one of my all time favorites. This one is likely to be overlooked and I want to make sure I recommend it any slasher fan. In fact, I highly recommend putting it into the queue for Halloween this year.

Cabin in the Woods (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 21:00:00 +0000

Cabin in the Woods (USA, 2011) - Color, Director(s): Drew Goddard
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 15]
Approx. 95 min.

Z-rating: 4 out of 5 stars for an absolutely FANTASTIC concept

Cheese Factor: 2 out of 5 stars for all the references and "in-jokes" that horror nerds eat up

A group of teens are away for the weekend in a cabin in the woods. Unbeknownst to them, what seems to be a government agency is orchestrating their deaths for a ritual sacrifice to appease some ancient gods. (Called "The Ancient Ones") Apparently, each country around the world is attempting to organize their own version of the ritual sacrifice but every country seems to have failed except for Japan and America. A wrench is thrown into the works when the kids start catching on to what's happening...

What is there to say about this movie? For one, I had a hard time trying to classify what kind of movie to even consider it. Supernatural? Slasher? Stoner Horror? Whatever subgenre you want to categorize it under, it's definitely worth a look if you haven't seen it yet. If only for the last 15 minutes of the film. It's absolute CHAOS!!!!!!! Maybe even the best 15 minutes in recent horror history. The problem? The rest of the film. Not that the movie was slow or hard to watch, it is just so mildly interesting compared to the better parts of the film. The first 20 minutes or so is absolute rubbish. Things start to get interesting once the cellar door opens and even then, it's just building up towards the last 15 minutes. Once they go downstairs, they choose their own method of death depending on what they pick up and play with. When you see the connection these items have with the method of death later on in the movie, that's where you start to see the references to other films show up.

Place your bets!! What will be killing the kids?

As a horror geek, my biggest complaint is probably the same as everyone else. Why wasn't the last 15 minutes longer?! The movie was only 95 min. I could've watched another 30-60 minutes of monsters on a rampage. Other than that, I definitely think this movie is worth at least a watch if you like horror movies. There are a TON of references and things to notice so it's a satisfying watch for horror movie geeks.

Nudity: Not much in the nudity department for this movie. There is one scene where the blonde girl takes her shirt off and we see her topless. So do the guys in the control room! One scene is better than none!!!

Gore: Lots. Heads decapitated, blood, guts, and people torn apart. Sheer volume, but a lot of it comes from violence that's implied. So while there are a lot of remains, not too much of that violence actually happens onscreen.

Awesome: Pretty freakin awesome. Like I said, the dull parts can get pretty boring especially when compared to the best parts of the movie. However, this movie is more of the package deal. The first time watching it, you'll either love it or hate it. If you're a horror geek though, you'll probably come back to it. On repeated viewing, you catch more of the references and the dull parts become easier to sit through. You have to judge it as a whole and not by its parts. I wouldn't go as far as to call it one of the best horror movies of the year but it was fun and worth at least one watch.

Idle Hands (1999)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 20:00:00 +0000

Idle Hands (USA, 1999) - Color, Director(s): Rodman Flender
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 18]
Approx. 90 min.

Z-rating: 5 out of 5 stars for laugh out loud horror hilarity!

Cheese Factor: 3 out of 5 stars for stupid fun cheesiness

Time for a fun movie, this is an oldie but goodie. Idle Hands is one of those movies that I can watch over and over again. Part Horror movie that almost feels like a Slasher film at some moments, part stoner film, part teen scream with a young and sexy Jessica Alba, and all Comedy!!!

A lazy stoner kid named Anton (Devon Sawa who later stars in Final Destination) and his two stoner friends like to hang out and get stoned. (He uses a modified inhaler as a pipe!) Anton's parents are murdered and when they finally discover the bodies, all the evidence points to Anton being the killer. As it turns out, his hand is possessed and it proceeds to kill his two best friends too. Anton has a crush on the girl across the street (Alba) and inadvertently gets her involved in all this too. The hand wants a soul to take back to Hell and when Anton foolishly cuts his hand off thinking it'll solve the problem, the hand is free to go on a killing spree and roam about in search of the soul it wants. Meanwhile, a bad ass Druid high priestess (Vivica A. Fox) is hunting down the demon that possessed Anton's hand, she's the only one with the weapon to stop the hand.

This movie is lots of fun and recommended for anyone who has to entertain for people who aren't hardcore horror fans. Also good to play at party or something. Even more fun when you have a bong to pass around while watching this movie...

Nudity: There's one scene with nudity that clearly sticks out in my mind. The rest of the scenes are just them talking about sex or making references to it.

Gore: Not bad in the gore department. More than I expected. Seth Green gets stabbed in the head with a glass bottle and I think you can head the liquid slosh around inside. Definitely more than I expected from a Horror/Comedy

Awesome: Totally! I think this movie is absolutely hilarious and like to watch it every now and then. Stoner humor with a lot of references and things to look at in the background. The Offspring are playing at the dance, there's Rob Zombie's Dragula music video is playing on TV in one scene, and they're watching the original Dawn of the Dead in another.

The Entity (1982)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 19:00:00 +0000

The Entity (USA, 1982) - Color, Director(s): Sidney J. Furie
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 18]
Approx. 125 min.

Z-rating: 4 out of 5 stars for being effectively disturbing

Cheese Factor: 1 out of 5 stars for the cheesy lightning effects that look dated

The shocking first look at "The Entity"

This movie is supposedly based on real events that took place in the 1970s. There is a really unsettling rape scene in the opening of this movie. I know all rape is unsettling in general but the fact that you can't really see the attacker makes it impossible to gauge the chances of her escape. Also, the pounding score emphasized by her struggling makes the viewer even more uneasy. When I first heard about this movie, I thought that the ghost rape would be laughable at best and expected the movie to be totally cheesy. To my surprise, the scenes were very intense and the tension from the score was unbelievable!!! You can actually see Barbara Hershey's breasts being groped by invisible hands. (Hershey also plays Josh's mom in the movie Insidious)

That's just disturbing...

First, she seeks psychiatric help but, when she starts getting a hard time from her therapist, she employs the help of two paranormal geeks that she meets down at the bookstore who do your typical "Ghost Hunters" act. The psychiatrist thinks that the paranormal geeks are just encouraging her "fantasies" and fights to have her continue treatment with him. Finally, they try to design this elaborate set up in order to trap the ghost in the end. Pretty crazy stuff, I wonder how much of the last part is actually true?

Nudity: There are a few scenes with nudity in it, of course, Hershey's character is getting raped in most of the scenes. Probably even all of them.

Gore: Not much in terms of gore, but there are scenes on intense sexual violence

Awesome: Very, in terms of it being a dark and terrifying movie. Not the type of movie you enjoy for fun but the powerful type of movie that really makes an impact on you. I'm a guy and I never thought I could be scared of getting raped by a ghost at night. Anyway, I like to pretend that this is the prequel for Insidious and that's really why she was so familiar with that psychic Elise.

Sinister (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 18:00:00 +0000

Sinister (USA, 2012) - Color, Director(s): Scott Derrickson
MPAA Rating: R
[UK: 15]
Approx. 110 min.

Z-rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars for an enjoyable story

Cheese Factor: 1 out of 5 stars

There is a lot of talk comparing this movie to Insidious. I'm not sure why but I guess I can see some of the similarities. Either way, I found it to be a very interesting story about a fictional deity that lives in pictures and consumes the soul of children.

A true crime novelist, played by Ethan Hawke (Taking Lives, Training Day), moves into a new town with his family and into the house where a family of four were hung in the backyard. Unbeknownst to his wife and children, he's researching the murders that took place in this house and happens upon a box of Super 8 films that document each of the murders up in the attic. The local law enforcement generally doesn't seem too pleased to have him in town so rather than get the police to help, he watches the films by himself at night and finds clues to link the murders. His son suffers from night terrors and has been known to walk around in the middle of the night. He starts hearing noises in the middle of the night but decides to keep watching the films. One of the deputies in town is actually a fan of his and asks him for an autograph. The deputy also asks to assist him in his research of the murders and helps gather information. Weird things start happening in the middle of the night, like the projector starting up on its own in his office, but he just keeps watching the movies. Slowly he's beginning to crack at the edges and is a nervous wreck because he thinks that the mysterious figure he sees in all the movies is stalking him in his own house.

The weird demon thing wasn't as big a part of the movie as you would think. The presence of this creature can be felt but it really only appears in a couple critical scenes. This one almost plays out like a crime drama with a horror side story. I thought the story was good, but there are so many things that could've been expanded on and other things that could've been shortened. The movie is nearly 2 hours long but you don't get a sense that they used their time wisely. There are characters that I think should've been utilized more, such as the University Professor that was an expert in the occult. I felt like he was the biggest source of information for the viewer but we only see him for short periods of time and he only shows up twice in the film!!

Nudity: None

Gore: A lot of the violence is implied or the main character looks away to avoid seeing the violence from the film. I think the R rating is for language rather than violence.

Awesome: Not bad. I like that the movie had a sense of humor, some of the conversations were so stupid that you couldn't help but laugh. The crime drama aspect of the film was so interesting that I almost want it to just be in a different genre altogether. (Taking Lives was really good!) I was a little disappointed to find out that the deity is completely fictional and made up for the script of this movie. I would've appreciated being able to come home and do my own research on this deity, making it more real for me. That would've been more fun anyway, still, an interesting movie overall. I think if I were to compare it to Insidious though, Insidious was creepier and did a better job of setting the mood. Also like Insidious, this film tries to addresses moving out of the house that's haunted. Well, you'll see how that plays out.

Insidious (2010)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 17:00:00 +0000

Insidious (USA, 2010) - Color, Director(s): James Wan
MPAA Rating: PG-13
[UK: 15]
Approx. 103 min.

Z-rating: 3 out of 5 stars for being a decently creepy PG-13 horror

Cheese Factor: 2 out of 5 stars for the cheesy computer graphics that makes this movie look silly

This movie made a big buzz when it was coming out in theaters, apparently this went head-to-head with Scream 4 back in April 2011. Some horror fans saw it as a battle for the future of horror, if Scream won in the box office that would mean studio execs would see more profit in milking out sequels from the same tired old franchises. Insidious was supposed to be a completely original movie, a fresh idea, and maybe studio execs would invest more into independent films if it out performed Scream in the box offices. I think they both performed about equally well, but the budget for this film ($1,500,000) was significantly lower than Scream 4 ($40,000,000). I hope the studio execs were paying attention!

A family is apparently just moving into a new house, mom's a composer and dad's a teacher. They're slowly unpacking but some things seem to be moving around on their own. After going up to the creepy attic, one of the kids inexplicably falls into a coma. The doctors can't find anything wrong with him, and 3 months later, they send him home from the hospital. Things start getting really strange after that, with mom hearing a strange whispering over the baby monitor that slowly get louder until it turns into shouting and wakes the baby. Other strange things start happening like getting mysterious visitors in the middle of the night but what really sends them into a panic is one day mom finds a handprint on the bedsheets of the boy in the coma one day.

This is where things start to get interesting. The most common question asked about these kinds of movies is why doesn't the family just leave? Move out of the haunted house and go somewhere safe where it's not haunted? This movie actually has the family move out after a night where the spirits materialize and tries to grab mom in bed, that's when they decide that they're going to move. (They should get an award for smartest family in a horror movie!) Unfortunately for them, whatever it is seems to have followed them into the new house. Mom consults a priest but Grandma (on Dad's side) says she has a friend to suggest that might be able to help. They agree and are sent a pair of "investigators" to check out the house first, to verify that it's really haunted. Once it was confirmed, they call in the psychic medium, Elise, who arrives and immediately recognizes Dad from when he was younger. She walks around the house and, once inside of the son's room, she sees a demon that she describes to one of her "investigators" who sketches it out.

Elise then comes out with an explanation for all the strange events that have been taking place. The son is able to astral project in his sleep, so he has wandered too far from his physical body and gotten lost. The weakening link between his spiritual and his physical body is inviting malevolent spirits from another plane of existence to take over his physical body. At first, Dad doesn't believe them and kicks them out of the house but then invites them back after realizing that they're right. The truth is revealed that Dad used to astral project in his sleep as well, that's where the son gets it, and he's only one who can go in and get his son back.

Nudity: None.

Gore: Being a PG-13 movie, there was no gore and not much blood of any kind either. This was more a "chills and scares" than the "blood and guts" type of movie.

Awesome: Very. There was some interesting camerawork employed here, which gave the film a lot of style but the music was what really stole the show. Very creepy music would heighten the tension on certain scenes, felt kinda like Psycho. My biggest complaint were the cheesy effects used to animate the "smiles" on some of the ghosts. I thought the story and music were doing a great job of setting a creepy tone and atmosphere but the cheesy effects took me out of the moment and made me want to laugh at how ridiculous it looked. James Wan is very talented (famous for directing Saw, which was a sleeper hit) that really shows his range and skill as a director by nailing both rated R and PG-13 horror films. Also showing how valuable he is as a filmmaker by pulling such large returns for films made with significantly lower budgets. (This one alone grossed $97,009,150 worldwide)

Apologies

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 16:54:00 +0000

Sorry everyone, I fell behind once again on my reviews and it was hard as hell to catch up. I would like to apologize to all the readers that checked back each day hoping for a new review. By my calculation, I still owe all of you 5 more Supernatural Horror movie reviews and about 5 mixed horror reviews, including today's review. I will do my best to catch up before Halloween. Starting now, I will be publishing a new Supernatural Horror review every hour. I will be posting the mixed reviews by tonight. Happy Haunting to all!!!

The Woman in Black (2012)

noreply@blogger.com (The Boogeyman) — Fri, 19 Oct 2012 07:07:00 +0000

The Woman in Black (UK/Canada/Sweden, 2012) - Color, Director(s): James Watkins
MPAA Rating: PG-13
[UK: 12A]
Approx. 95 min.

Z-rating: 3 out of 5 stars for a spook film that falls a little flat

Cheese Factor: 2 out of 5 stars for trying to get me to take Harry Potter seriously

I really wanted to like this film seeing as the only other film in director James Watkins' filmography is Eden Lake, which I really enjoyed and wanted to show my support for his second attempt at sitting in the director's chair. (Not to mention it's a freakin' HAMMER FILM!!!) I also applaud his confidence in working on the other end of the ratings spectrum seeing as he rocked the R-rated Eden Lake, this was a chance to see what he could do in the PG-13 end of the rating system. Unfortunately, he doesn't quite pull it off in my opinion.

One of the problems is this movie is hard as hell to follow. Not that the story is too complicated but that there is so much talking and such long boring scenes that put me to sleep. I first tried to watch this movie after it came out on DVD, I had to try on at least 3 or 4 separate occasions before I finally finished the damn movie. I usually applaud films for taking the time to build a creepy atmosphere but here it just drags on and I lose interest. (I watched Turkish Star Wars on VHS with no subtitles, I think I can safely say that I have a lot of patience when it comes to sitting through movies!)

Anyway, what I caught of it, Harry Potter is in some strange town on a business trip for some paperwork. During his stay, he encounters the local town legend of the spirit of a woman in black. She hung herself after her child drowned and is now a vengeful spirit that haunts the small town, taking the lives of other children for revenge. I think they could've done the woman better seeing as she's what the entire movie is based on. The CGI was a little choppy but she had a VERY annoying scream. I thought the bad CGI ghost women that screamed like banshees were a thing of the past, that's a little clichéd if you ask me.

Nudity: None. Some titties would've helped the beginning not be so damn boring. Although, everyone in the movie was either a little kid or older woman.

Gore: Not much, as you probably would've guessed with a PG-13 movie. There is one scene where a little girl that drinks lye dies in Harry Potter's arms. Should've mixed her up some sorta antidote or potion to save the little girl's life!

Awesome: Maybe not as bad as I'm making it out to be but not as great as everyone hyped it up to be. I wanted to make sure I rented this for Halloween cause I knew people were going to be talking about it this year and wanted to review it. I will admit that when we first catch glimpses of the woman in black, those scenes were pretty creepy. Once we're deeper into the movie and she turns into a banshee, that's when I can't take the movie anymore. How difficult it was to get into this movie in the beginning and how annoying the scenes towards the end were just kinda kills it for me. Even though there are a couple creepy scenes in the middle, that wasn't enough to redeem the entire movie. I do like that Hammer's really coming back up in the horror scene and I'd love to show them a little support. This one just wasn't for me though.