Chester the Best-er

Dear The World,

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 13:00:00 +0000

I'm done chasing you. Or at least, I'm done chasing you through virtual means. And by virtual, I mostly mean Facebook. And by done, I mean until March first.

I kinda like you, World. I kinda like your inhabitants. But I especially like knowing them in real life, and I feel like this whole social network thing is keeping me from being exactly that: Social. This "staying connected" is just creating this truly disturbing disconnection. So, bye-bye.

Maybe you'll miss me, World. Maybe not. All I know is that I miss me. So you know, if you want me, here's my blog. You've got my email too. And if you're special, you've got my number. Stalk me that way, because I'm done stalking you.

But you'll have to be quick to catch me, because I'll be running.

That marathon sure isn't far off anymore. :-)

Love,
Chess

So this weekend was dot dot dot.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 04:12:00 +0000

I wish I had one really great word to sum it all up, NOT the word "awesome." Because I'm pretty darn happy after not being pretty darn happy. And I feel like I can face the next couple weeks of work, no problem.

See, there were movies, and breakfast, and laughing, and terrible church lessons, and ice-skating, and grilled cheese sandwiches, and Narnia, and cold feet, and snackums.

But I can't think of one word because I haven't slept in two days.

So you can watch this, because clearly we didn't listen to it enough and laugh our heads off every time.

First weekend off in...well, EVER.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 16:27:00 +0000

I'm so happy.

SO. happy.

I wish I could tell you how happy I am, but there aren't words. Well, maybe a couple.

Logan. Friends. YSB. Um, homemade breakfast food.

HAHA.

Just wanted to let you know that I joined a gym.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 19:20:00 +0000

"People-Watching at the Gym" is officially back, people!!

Get ready.

So much judgment. So little time.

(Also, I consider myself a fairly coordinated sort of dancer. Pretty sure I am soooo awkward at Zumba. I'm used to teaching line dances, not lumbering about like an elephant. Because that's what I'm doing. Lumbering about like an Asian elephant.)

I need to move out ASAP...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 20:10:00 +0000

or I will lose my mind.

My father sulks and pouts more than any child I know. I think the best way to stay close with my family is to stay far, far away from them.

Bleargh.

Because inquiring minds want to know...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 14:00:00 +0000

The deets, yo. The deets. You've demanded them, and by golly, I'm here to supply them!!

Except....I actually don't know the deets. I have an idea of them, but they are still in the planning process.

The idea is that I go to graduate school somewheres. The idea is that I study how to become a school counselor. Por que? Because I was a-scraping dirty plates at work last week and was like, "I miss my kids. I wish I were playing with them, instead of doing this."

(No. I am not a mother. That's for those of you new to this blog. PS. WELCOME!)

I miss being a tutor. I miss playing with kids. I miss helping them do their homework. I miss their big smiles and going to their concerts or their dance performances at the basketball games because, "Chessie, you have to come! It won't be any fun without you!" Now I know I can't do that for the rest of my life, but after working so closely with the guidance counselors, I too could be an advocate for and help head the programs that would give other college students the same great experience I had. Bonus: I don't have to assign homework, write tests, or control a classroom.

That's the idea.

I missed the application deadline to start next fall, so I have plenty of time to prepare, work, and save but...What do you think? I need all the encouragement you can spare. I'm easily spooked and discouraged. Especially by something as big as this.

(Those of you familiar with the application process, I could use all the help I can get--GRE test prep, asking for letters of recommendation [I feel super awkward about this, considering it's been a year since I graduated], writing personal statements, interviews [if applicable], financial aid, etc, etc. WHAT AM I GETTING MYSELF INTO?)

Mis queridos muchachos...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 19:03:00 +0000

Dear Red M&M,
I wrote a really gorgeous poem about you two and half years ago. I reread it and it needs to be rewritten.

Later!
Totes over you.

Dear Cute C. the Cook,
YSB's back. But you are still my eye candy at work.

Wink,
Your coworker.

Other cook,
Why are you smiling at me all of a sudden?!

Warily yours,
Chess

Dear Teller,
I have two transactions to make today. One to savings and one to checking. Maybe I'll come inside and we can make seven people wait behind me again while we chat? :)

Sincerely,
Chess

Dear Tenants of 2 Frat 2 Furious,
You all ruined my New Year's Eve.

Annoyed (but still your seemingly only female friend),
Chester

Dear Yummy Smelling Boy,
I've a mad crush on you, still. It would be swell if you felt the same way. You should let me know. :)

Love,
Chess

I'm feeling way gruesome.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 15:00:00 +0000

Happy New Year!! I know this is supposed to be a positive time or whatever. Time for new goals and a clean slate and all that junk. I have an awesome list of goals. But right now, all I can think about is dying. Isn't that terrible? But that's what I've been thinking about today. (And I'm scaring myself. It's like when Anne Shirley imagines herself perishing and makes herself cry. Which made me laugh.)

What if I were sick and knew I was going to die? Who would I tell? What would I do? With whom would I spend my last days? What rubbish would I eat? (Doughnuts for dinner or banana pudding? Or both?) What frivolous purchase would I spend all of my money on? Where would I go for my last chance vacation?

What secrets would I confess? (*cough*YSB*cough*)

Would anyone come to my funeral? Would anyone miss me?

Sorry. This is weird. Clearly, I need a break from working so much.

You know that part in Tangled where Flynn Rider goes, "Guys, I want a castle"?

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 19:19:00 +0000

Well, just imagine that tone of voice, when I say,

"Groupies, I'm going to grad school."

Things that made me laugh this Christmas...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 15:00:00 +0000

This conversation:

Context: I stuffed mini-stockings for my friends' Christmas presents. Each one had a plastic party favor medal that said "Winner!" on it.

"You gave us each one! We can't all be winners!"

"If only this said 'Chessie's friend' on it--I would never take it off."

"I'd tattoo 'Chessie's friend' on my chest."

"I will die wearing this."

These text messages (from a boy):

"Merry Christmas! I hope you got the Polly Pocket you asked for."

"You left a flower ring here, by the way. I'd give it back, but I can't stop wearing it."

These movie quotes:

"Please bless this highly nutritious microwaveable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen."

"Buzz! Your girlfriend! Woof."

"When what's left of you gets around to what's left to be gotten, what's left to be gotten won't be worth getting whatever you've got left."

"When I've figured what that means, I'll come up with a crushing reply."

How was your Christmas??!!

Sometimes I say things I shouldn't...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 07:18:00 +0000

just because I know how disgusted my friends will be with me. It's how I know they love me.

"Chess, what are you listening to these days?"

"Justin Bieber's Christmas album."

(It's true though. I'm listening to it. Like right now.)

Haha.

I like happy orange juice...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 18:13:00 +0000

It's easier to drink if it's smiling at you.

(Which is why this is the only kind I buy.)

Guys, there's another one.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 17:39:00 +0000

YSB 2.0

How do I know this? Sat next to him in the movie theater watching a stupid movie.

Ah, deja vu.

(Did I mention he's a cook at the restaurant? That started working after I had that dream...)

What do I do?! (Haha.)

My contacts got recalled...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 22:45:00 +0000

So I wonder if I returned faulty contacts...

I gave up top-secret super powers that I was not supposed to have.

Somehow, all my issues lead back to the Power Rangers.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 15:00:00 +0000

Like my nerd bone.

I have a nerd bone, guys. It's like a funny bone, but way more sensitive.

Sometimes I get crushes on boys. Mostly because they're cute. So I grin goofily at them because they don't know I think they're cute, and one day, they'll show up wearing glasses cos they lost their contacts, or it's allergy season, or they woke up late and their hair is all messy, and my nerd bone will go ping! Suddenly, they look all cute AND smart, which makes me go numb from head to toe on my left side.

Or is that a heart attack?

Maybe my heart IS my nerd bone.

I can only conclude that it is all Billy the Blue Power Ranger's fault.

Do you have an "[insert noun/adjective]" bone?

Next up: my issues with the color pink, playing an Asian, and long hair on boys.

I have achieved the impossible....TWICE.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Tue, 22 Nov 2011 18:01:00 +0000

Remember how I woke up with perfect hair this summer?

I did it again this morning!!! I am better than a movie star, for I am a real human being who woke up with perfect hair.

(It's pretty much the only thing I could put on a resume at this point in my life.)

And the WINNER of the TrendyXchange gift card is...

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 14:00:00 +0000

I would like you to know that the system I used to select the winner was highly sophisticated.

Step One: Write each of your names on my blank Golden Corral cards.

Step Two: Fold them in little airplanes.

Step Three: Take off my glasses so I can't tell which plane is whose and chuck them at Maggie Gyllenhaal's "Got Milk" poster that I found while looking for recipes in a Family Circle magazine.

Step Four: See which plane made it the closest.

Step Five: Put glasses back on to see who won!

Congratulations, Nina!! Maggie and I are so happy for you!! :)

You have until Tuesday morning (Nov 22) to email me at chessbess{at}gmail{dot}com to claim your prize. Otherwise, a new winner will be picked!

TrendyXchange GIVEAWAY!!!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 15:41:00 +0000

So guess what??!!

I have another giveaway--of a prize that is ready to go. I want to explain to the winners of the last giveaway that they can blame THIS GIRL for not having their prizes yet. I have gotten after her time and again, but she is just so busy busy. I haven't even gotten my cool t-shirt yet. Trust me, I haven't forgotten about you.

Anyway, about this giveaway. A few weeks after I moved back home, I was meeting my friends for a birthday dinner in Provo at a pizza place I had never been to previously.

I got there early, so I decided I would kill time and browse "that cute clothing store over there." When I got inside, unfortunately, the store was not open for selling, they were only buying clothes to build up their inventory. I talked to the manager and owner, Kalie, who explained the concept of the store to me--they buy your new or gently used brand name clothing (women's and men's) and give you 30-40% of their selling price, with the options of cash on the spot or in-store credit.

Even though I was bummed I couldn't buy yet, I was blown away by the adorable, welcoming design, the bright colors, and the nice clothes--they have a great selection of new items along with the used.

But then I got a brilliant idea, mostly because I was very poor. I said coyly, "So, your grand opening's not for a month...are you hiring?" One week later, I was behind the counter. And I love it. So even though I work there, my opinion of this store is completely honest and mine. It's a great concept, a wonderful store, and the staff is fantastic. We try our best.

So this week, Kalie has generously contributed a $25 Gift Card for one of you to use at the store!!! Hers is the first and (currently) only location, so the winner should live somewhere between Spanish Fork and Point of the Mountain! (Or at least be a frequent visitor.) Word, Utah County-ers, this one's for you!

All you have to do is "like" trendyXchange's Facebook page and tell them that Chester the Best-er sent you! Come back here and leave me a comment telling me you did so. This is required.

You have the chance for three extra entries for a total of four entries and you MUST leave a separate comment for each:

Become a follower of this blog or subscribe by email (see handy widgets at top right)
"Like" Chester the Best-er on Facebook (or see handy widget at top right)
Link to this blog post on Facebook so your friends (male or female) can enter too.

Contest is open to those in Utah County or those who visit often! Spread it like wildfire! You can enter until 11:59 pm on Sunday, November 20, 2011. Winner will be announced Monday morning!

I made out with one of the cooks

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 15:56:00 +0000

in my dream last night.

Is it because I hate no-shave November? Because he had some scruff. But that's the least of the problems with this dream.

First, I've never made out with anyone. How do I know I was doing it right? More importantly, am I even cute enough to be worth making out with? (Yeesh, how many prepositions did I just dangle?)

Second. He was no cook I've ever seen at work. I know this because he was good-lookin'.

Third. If he was a cook, then why didn't he bring me a takeout box?!!!

Last night was Military Appreciation Day at Golden Corral.

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 13:00:00 +0000

I was eating before my shift, before all the veterans and soldiers came in with their families to enjoy a meal on the house (just the veterans and the soldiers--cos we don't care if the families eat or not--jokes!), and I noticed that the orange chicken was pleasantly non-spicy, unlike before, when it was so encrusted with crushed red pepper that it was almost impossible to swallow.

I pointed this out to my manager, saying, "Can I just say this is so much better than it used to be?"

And he said, "Of course you can say that, it's a free country!"

I exclaimed loudly, "It IS. All of these people have fought for my right to say that the pseudo Chinese orange chicken is now palatable! I APPRECIATE them."

Aren't I just so patriotic? :)

So I talked to my chin this morning,

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 16:45:00 +0000

And I said,

"Why the [bleeeeeeeep] are you breaking out like it's 2002 and you're drinking a frozen CapriSun after PE?!!!!!!!!!"

Dear Mr. Chester,

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 15:00:00 +0000

It's 11/11/11. I kind of wish I were marrying you today.

Because at 11:11 pm, I would tell you that, despite it being the most powerful wish day ever, I wouldn't need to make a wish tonight, because I already had you.

Love,
Chess

The Life Story -- Fred and Trudy: Part III (1/2)

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 15:00:00 +0000

The Life Story -- Fred and Trudy: Part III

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 14:00:00 +0000

So Fred and Trudy finally got their act together and were married on March 22, 1985 in the Salt Lake Temple in Salt Lake City, Utah. Family and friends were present, including Julie, the woman who served a mission and taught Trudy the Gospel.

But the ceremony didn't happen right away. No one knew why there was a wait, but then a temple worker came in and said, "We're sorry for the delay. The temple president, Elder Hanks, has requested to do this sealing, and he will be a few more minutes. Do you mind waiting?" But of course not!!

The mystery, though! The questions! Why would Marion D. Hanks of the Seventy specifically request to perform their sealing? (Among the workers: Who are Fred and Trudy, anyway?) Like most mysteries, there was an explanation. When Trudy joined the Church, the mission president was Doug Powelson and Elder Hanks was president of the Asia Area. At the time, President Powelson had told Elder Hanks about the American who had joined the Church in Taiwan (which, if you haven't figured it out, is quite unusual--then again this family never did anything the usual way, as you'll soon discover).

Today, however, Pres. Powelson said to Pres. Hanks, "Remember that girl I told you about who joined the Church in Taiwan? She's getting married here," and Pres. Hanks replied, "Well then, I want to perform the sealing."

Done and done.

Trudy was very proud when all was said and done and she hadn't shed a tear. She was pretty caught up in the dress, all the attention, and the general commotion, but then she saw Julie, her missionary. She saw all the changes that had happened, and the different path she had been led to because Julie had decided to serve a mission and teach Trudy the gospel, and well, there was much tearing up.

But they were tears of joy, and then it was time to party!

Mercy me, where have I been?

noreply@blogger.com (Chess) — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 17:36:00 +0000

Well, I'll tell you where I've been.

I've been here three, sometimes four, days a week:

This is the actual one I work at. Thanks Google Image Search.
One day I'll take one myself.

I've been here three, sometimes four, days a week:

Those of you in the Orem/Provo/SLC/Wasatch area, you really need to come by.
Cute store and great deals on new and used clothing. Plus we buy yours.
Look at that free advertising, boss. You're welcome trendyXchange.

Playing with this little monster:

I'm an awesome photographer. I capture movement so well.

And I've been doing a ton of this:

Because I was crazy and signed up for this:

No. Not the 5k. Not the Tuff Kids Race (even though I am tuff). No. This girl is running the whole 13.1. She ran 11 a week and a half ago.

And there you go. I'm not missing. Or dead.

Just very, very tired.

How are you?!!