Chief Mockery Officer

Now too lazy to post...go to my Facebook page

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 17 May 2011 21:53:00 +0000

The one hour of actual work I have to at the office is proving too much. For the time being I won't be posting on this blog but just putting stuff up directly on my Facebook page. If you haven't done it yet, LIKE ME or FOLLOW ME.

This is truly gangsta

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 20:55:00 +0000

Titties and carrot cake: that actually is all I really need.

via Huffington Post

Gatling gun slingshot

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 20:45:00 +0000

This guy could sell a bunch to the Libyan rebels.

via BroBible

Flaming wallet prank

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 20:25:00 +0000

Do this at the wrong fast food joint and you might just get yourself accidentally shot.

via Stuff I Stole From The Internet

Car Porn of the Day: Lamborghini Aventador

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 20:19:00 +0000

Makes me wish I had a better job. Sigh...

Uber fusion

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 20:15:00 +0000

This can't possibly be good. I can only imagine the morning aftermath on the toilet.

via Banned in Hollywood

Vietnamese girl rocks Billie Jean

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 25 Apr 2011 20:10:00 +0000

I'm just thrilled to have a post on a Vietnamese girl and it's actually SFW. This girl is pretty awesome though.

via Hyphen Magazine

Our Marines can do a Britney cover and still kick ass

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 14:30:00 +0000

Why dating an older MILF would be awesome

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 14:22:00 +0000

via UberHumor

Mission Impossible Squirrel

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 14:13:00 +0000

Some bored people in England set up this contraption in their backyard and trained a squirrel to get all Mission Impossible.

Naked chicks help society

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 14:34:00 +0000

Nudity for Charity could be the greatest Internet invention of all time. The site enables ladies to raise money for their favorite charity by offering to get naked once a certain dollar threshold is raised. So far only a handful of girls have taken advantage of this wonderful concept but I'm hopeful this site will really take off.

I could use some Viagra beer

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 14:25:00 +0000

To commemorate the upcoming royal nuptials, Scottish brewery Brewdog is releasing Royal Virility Performance Viagra Beer which contains herbal Viagra and other goodies that are suppose to get you strong like wood. Bottles sell for about 15 bucks and only 1,000 bottles will be available.

via Laughing Squid

College degrees explained

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 14:18:00 +0000

via Izismile

My work day anthem

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 14:03:00 +0000

I need this pill

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 13:54:00 +0000

via Uber Humor

Who says there are no jobs to be had

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 13:49:00 +0000

via Turd Furgeson Blog

Crush of the Day: Nathalie Kelley

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 20 Apr 2011 14:40:00 +0000

I love those aha moments, like this morning when I realized that the girl from 2 Fast 2 Furious Tokyo Drift is also that sexy cutie in the Bruno Mars video. Let's hope we see more of Nathalie Kelley in the future. Oh btw, she's got a topless photo floating around so if you've got some free time at work...

94 percent chance you will get bowel cancer

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 20 Apr 2011 14:22:00 +0000

Here's some bad news dear minions: a recent study in Australia shows that having a desk job will increase your chances of developing a tumor in your bowels by 94 percent. Apparently even vigorous exercise won't help:

"Even a high level of vigorous recreational physical activity did not modify the effect of sedentary work.' And they warned: ‘The findings have occupational health implications, given that advances in technology have led to increasing amounts of sedentary behaviour at work.' Sitting down on the job is thought to lead to increased blood sugar levels and damage insulin production, both of which have been linked with the development of bowel cancer"

So basically you're screwed.

I now like ukuleles

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 20 Apr 2011 14:14:00 +0000

via BuzzHunt

Happy 420 Day

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 20 Apr 2011 14:13:00 +0000

I don't partake but I'm sure some of you do. Puff puff give minions.

via My Confined Space

Tracy Morgan on the Internet

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 20 Apr 2011 13:59:00 +0000

via Uber Humor

When a tow truck would be a good idea

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 20 Apr 2011 13:57:00 +0000

via Random Funny Picture

I guess the Monty Python crew sould also be thrown in jail

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 15:32:00 +0000

I'm not sure why there isn't more outrage over the jailing of YouTube comedian Evan Emory for the video he made of himself singing a sexually explicit song to a bunch of school kids. Now, he didn't actually sing the dirty words to the kids, he simply used some creative video editing to make it seem like he did. Apparently the parents of the kids got in a tizzy and long story short, Mr. Emory will now spend two months in jail and be forever cast as a child molester for a silly little prank.

Now don't get me wrong, OBVIOUSLY I'm against sexually exploiting kids. But this is just plain retarded. Sending a guy to jail for a presumably funny ass video (the video was taken down so I haven't actually seen it) where no kids were actually molested seems a bit - no, very much over the top. If this guy gets jail time for his video, than perhaps we should send the comedic geniuses behind The Meaning of Life to the electric chair for their epic sperm song below. Forget video splicing, these fuckers had kids actually singing about the sanctity of sperm. AND some of them were naked as well.

Hope I don't get thrown in jail for this post.

BBC Human Planet: The Douche

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 15:12:00 +0000

The shirt you should wear on your next performance review

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 15:06:00 +0000

via The Laughing Squid