Child By Faith

Cut In Half - Book Review

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Thu, 25 Aug 2011 19:33:00 +0000

"If miracles were given to those who deserve them, they would simply not exist" ~ Ana Le Roux

I love reading stories about faith! I am always amazed and encouraged at how powerful our God really is.

I recently had the opportunity to read "Cut in Half" by Ana Le Roux who "wanted to tell the world that miracle's happen everyday to everyone", and her story did not disappoint!

After only a few weeks of her second child's birth, Ana and her family were in a terrible head on collision. Her husband and both her 3 year old daughter and 1 month old son walked away without a scratch, but that was not the case for Ana. She was in the back seat wearing a lap seat belt and the impact of the accident literally "cut her in half".

Ana shares the dramatic events that happened as she discovered not only a God that heals, but a God that performs miracles! "23 miracles" in fact is how Ana titles her book. The miracle's range from an experienced nurse driving in the car behind her who was able to give her immediate assistance, to the miracle of God's perfect timing of her writing the book where "God's gift to me was closure." God even changed her perspective of the accident from horror to now being one of her greatest memories.

My Thoughts:
I instantly fell in love with Ana as I was reading her story. I felt her pain, I felt her grief, I felt her joy! Her story captivated me from the moment I picked it up. Ana does not claim to be the perfect Christian or to have had perfect faith through her trials. In fact some of her chapters must have been very hard to write about, where she talks about depression and suicidal thoughts. But that is part of what is intriguing about her. She was just an ordinary wife and mom who had an ordinary faith in Christ, until God used an unexpected event to change her faith from sceptical to unwavering! I think we can all relate to her story.

She learned that: "merely asking is not enough. You need to believe that what you have asked for will happen ... You need to be spiritually convinced that something will happen, even if it seems unlikely in the spiritual realm."

"I have sorely underestimated (the power of prayer) most of my life"

"A conscious decision has to be made every morning that you will get through the day no matter what"

If you are looking for inspiration that God can do miracle's in impossible situations then "Cut In Half" is the book for you! It would also make a wonderful gift to someone recovering from an accident or illness. There are so many wonderful lesson's that Ana shares as God began to increase her faith that your faith will increase also as you read her book!

You can purchase a copy of "Cut In Half" at www.DeepRiverBooks.com

*I received a copy of this book to review from Bring It On Communications, but I was not financially compensated in any way. The opinions expressed are my own and are based on my observations while reading this novel.*

Book Review - The Son In My Eyes

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 16:19:00 +0000

Book: The Son In My Eyes , Seeing the Light of Jesus in Vietnam

Authors: Mai Spencer
Dixie Phillips

The Son In My Eyes is an intriguing story of Mai, a young Buddhist girl who survived the Vietnam war. Mai shares the hardships and abuse she endured while helping to support her family at the young age of 8. She not only felt terrorized by the American government while dodging bombs in the jungle. But also by Vietnam's own militia, the Viet Cong, who were responsible for the deaths of two of her uncles. Mai had her own near death experience when she was directly exposed to Agent Orange.

Mai's life changed when she married a young American solider named Dennis and moved to the United States. But sadly tragedy still followed her. It wasn't until one of her daughters was diagnosed with Cancer that Mai fell on her knees and prayed to Jesus for the first time. Almost immediately her life was transformed into something beautiful. It wasn't that the trials had left, but Mai began to see that placing her trust in Jesus could bring the peace that she had been longing for. Even though she didn't know the Lord as a young girl, Mai could see that Jesus had been with her for her entire life.

Shortly after Mai's conversion as a Christian, her husband Dennis committed his life to Christ. Mai never forgot her hometown of Binh Chau, and felt a deeper burden for her countrymen that they would also have the opportunity to know this wonderful Savior. Through a lot of hard work and prayers, and once again coming against obstacles from the government of Vietnam, Mai succeeded and built her church!

Mai's story is one of hope, love and forgiveness. When she knew she couldn't go on, she found a Savior with whom she could cast her burdens on. Mai's story is heartfelt and inspiring as she shares her testimony of how God teaches her to forgive her past and let go of bitterness. Her desire to reach others is very compelling. I was also impressed with her humility. She takes no credit for the things she has been able to accomplish through Jesus Christ, but she points to the one who gave her the ability. Although Mai doesn't give herself the credit, she is a Missionary for our Lord.

This book is really fast paced. Every page felt like a new adventure and I couldn't stop reading once I started. It seems surreal that one person could go through so much. But it is also exciting to know that no matter what walk of life we come from, Jesus is waiting for us all! I know you will be inspired by Mai's story, and will be encouraged to take that leap of faith for yourself. I highly recommend you read "The Son In My Eyes"!

You can get your own copy of Mai's book The Son In My Eyes at Deep River Books for $14.99.

*I received a copy of this book to review but I was not financially compensated in any way. The opinions expressed are my own and are based on my observations while reading this novel.*

What do your priorities look like?

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Wed, 15 Jun 2011 10:48:00 +0000

I know many of you are wondering when I will be re-opening my Etsy shop Sarahsewta. Well don't worry, I am anxious to get the shop going again and hope to do so within the month. In the meantime the Lord has put on my heart to start a new project. Well not necessarily a new project, just an upgrade to an old project. I know many of my friends are going to be saying, "Sarah really? Another project? Don't you have a hard enough time keeping up with what you are already doing?" LOL Yes I thought the same thing, that is why my shop is currently closed. But a few months ago I stopped and re-evaluated some things and here is what I found:

1. I love to sew, but I don't want it to be the only thing I do.
2. I need to give more time to family and friends, and less time to the computer.
3. My shop is really hurting all my other ministries. Infact I have no time for anything else when I run the shop full time. (Thank you all to my wonderful fans who bless me with so much work!)
4. I am exhausted all the time and only want to sleep when I am not sewing.
5. Facebook and emails can be very stressfull and overwhelming and I needed a break.
6. I am not business minded enough to run this shop properly, I always give my profit's away! LOL
7. I want my sewing business to stay a hobby, and not be a burden or "work". If this cannot be achieved I don't want to do it.
8. I have such an incredible testimony that I have an obligation to share it with others, this needs to be a priority.
9. I want to be obedient to God and open to his leading, and when I get too busy I am too tired to listen.
10. If I invest as much time and energy proclaiming the gospel as I have with this shop, imagine where I would be right now.

I'm sure the list goes on and on but you get the idea. My priorities were way out of line. I allowed a hobby to overtake my life and become a burden. I became too tired to listen to God or to be of any worth to my friends. So I need to find a balance. One where I can still enjoy sewing, have time to minister, and most important have time to listen to God and his leading in my life. Many people would be scared to lose part of their income just because it interfered with their priorities. But let me assure you, being in God's will is not an option in my life. It is a MUST! And I don't care what the cost to get there. The minute I know something is hindering me from being what God want's me to be, I STOP! My first and foremost priority is to follow the leading of God. And I can't be afraid to change directions as my relationship with him evolves. The new path may seem unfamiliar and scarry, but if God is taking me there I know he will be with me and I have nothing to fear.

So my question for you today is, what do your priorities look like? Are you on the right path for your life, or have you become sidetracked? Sit down and evaluate where you are in life and if you are on the right road. If you are that's great! Keep going! If not STOP and make those changes. Life is way to short to look back with regrets!

Oh and you may be wondering what my new project is .... well I will be letting you know soon! :)

~Sarah

The situation was hopeless ... BUT GOD!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 12:08:00 +0000

Several years ago I was very sick and on my death bed. (You can read my story HERE) Everything looked IMPOSSIBLE! I was in SO MUCH PAIN that my body constantly shook. No matter how much medication I was given, even while I was passed out, I shook with pain! I was so sick I didn't care who was around me or what they were doing. I didn't watch tv. I didn't read books. I just laid there in agony praying for mercy, praying to die! The doctor's said it was hopeless, there was nothing they could do, my body was failing! They gave me ALL the morphine I wanted, trying to make me as comfortable as possible until my transition to the next life. We called in our Pastor at the time. He said the death angel was there and left weeping, never saying a prayer of faith. The diagnosis was given. I was going to die. Doctor's had spoken it. Pastor's had spoken it. We had accepted it. I had prayed for it.

THE SITUATION WAS HOPELESS!

BUT GOD! hahaha I love it when God says BUT! The situation was hopeless but God said "I will have the final say!" HALLELUJIAH THANK YOU JESUS! God came on the scene and changed those circumstances. He loves impossible situations to show his power to his people! I did not die! The "death angel" did not come and carry me away! My diagnosis was still there, but God changed the outcome!

Are you facing a situation that seems impossible? You've done everything you can to change things, but it still feels hopeless? Well I encourage you today to stop looking at the circumstances and trust in God. I know it feels scary to hope. You put all your feelings and emotions out there and are vulnerable. The "what if's" threaten to consume you. What if God doesn't do it? What if I don't have enough faith? What if it is still God's will for the answer to be no? What if I'm not strong enough? The list goes on and on. But you will `never truely know how BIG God can be in your life if you don't put him to the test. If you always accept circumstances as they are HE is not given the opportunity to show you how much he loves you. I will not lie to you, sometimes his answer is still no. But when you put your trust and faith completely in him, he gives you peace to accept what his will is. And I promise you that you will not be disappointed in HIM! Give faith a try! Put God to the test! And see what he will do in your life! Don't be afraid of the outcome, but TRUST IN HIM!

Psalms 18:30 "As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is tried: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him"

Psalms 34:22 "The Lord redeemeth the soul of his servants; and none of them that trust in him shall be desolate"

Psalms 37:5 "Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him, and he shall bring it to pass"

12 years after my death sentance I still trust in my Lord!

~Sarah

The Power of Praise!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Mon, 02 May 2011 22:18:00 +0000

This past Sunday my friend, who also has been standing by faith for her miracle baby for the past 9 years, announced that she is 9 weeks pregnant! What a GREAT and MIGHTY God we serve! She was infront of the church testifying and without even thinking I jumped up from my seat and ran up to her screaming and jumping and gave her a big hug. Then I fell on the floor crying and praising God for this miracle he has performed. He has answered my prayers, and my friend has conquered her trial and come out victorious through faith in Jesus Christ. Immediately came to my memory the post I wrote called "The Winter Blues". Another friend told us not to wish away any time, because this could be our time for conceiving, and for my friend that is exactly what happened! Oh what rejoicing when God fulfills his promises! It definately increases our faith for the promises we are still waiting for.

Not immediately, but within the hour I started being overwhelmed with a mental battle. "why did I have to find out the same week another friend will be giving birth?" "Why did I have to find out the week of my birthday?" I am over the moon excited for her, but "why not me too?" "Have I not stood strong enough?" "Have I waivered and didn't know it?" "Is there doubt and unbelief in my heart?" I could barely eat supper for being consumed with these thoughts. The devil was already trying to rob my victory.

I had the perfect solution! Since God is doing miracles right now I'd better go and try to get mine quickly, so I told my husband "let's go make our baby!" How carnal I was in thinking that I could work this out in the flesh! We started kissing and I lost it! Not like a few sniffles, I mean LOST IT! You would have thought someone had just died. And indeed I was grieving, for my empty womb. My husband was so sweet and just held me and rocked me. I was shaking so badly I thought I was going to be sick and I couldn't catch my breath at all. A deep agonizing mourning for myself and the loss I felt. How could I be so happy for my friend and so sad for myself at the same time?

I haven't slept well for the past few weeks and knew that if I let myself stay worked up like this that I would have a terrible, sleepless night filled with worry, frustration, pain, sin. I didn't want to doubt God! I know he promised me and it WILL happen! I don't know why it is taking so long, but I can't worry about that right now. I had to get control of myself before I spiral down into depression and the devil really get's ahold of me. I kept telling myself to get a grip and God has not failed me. I quoted scripture and claimed victory in every area of my life. But still this overwhelming sadness was gripping me and I couldn't shake it. I also knew that I've stood too long and hard to let the devil rob me now and I'm not going to let him defeat me. So I began to Praise Him! I couldn't even think about anything specific or I would break out into tears again. I just began to worship!

"Thank you Jesus for healing me! Thank you Jesus for your peace! Thank you Jesus for your joy! Thank you Lord for all the miracles you've already done for me! (read my testimony) Thank you Lord that I have never lost confidence in you! Thank you Jesus for your goodness to me! I praise your holy name Jesus, for you are great and greatly to be praised! You took those stripes on your back for MY healing, and conquered death, hell and the grave for MY victory! Every battle has already been fought and won! Thank you Jesus for all your blessings on me!" It's amazing what the POWER of praise can do! I began to feel a peace come over me. A peace that surpasses all understanding. A peace that I can leave my burdens with the Lord and he will be faithful to me if I stay faithful to him!

This entire incident was only about a half hour long before I fell into a deep and peaceful sleep. The best sleep I have had in weeks. And I slept the whole night! AMEN for that!

Today I can still feel the enemy trying to fight my mind and rob MY victory, but I will NOT give it to him! I have been listening to T.D. Jakes on YouTube. Reading my bible. Praying. Praising! KNOWING that my miracle IS on the way and NO DEVIL IN HELL can rob me! All day I have praised God for my friends baby and knowing what a miracle it is, my faith is increased. And I think that may be the real battle. The enemy doesn't want my faith increased. But too late! hahaha GOD HAS ALREADY WON!!

My confidence is not in the things of this world. Doctor's may say my womb has failed and I need a hysterectomy, but God says I AM HEALED! Doctor's may say I have surgical damage and too much scar tissue, but my God says I AM HEALED! Doctor's may say I have tumors all through my womb and it's impossible, but my God says I AM HEALED! Man may say that it can't be done, but my God says IT CAN BE DONE! Man may say it's been 14 years, why don't you just adopt, but my God says OUT OF YOUR WOMB YOU SHALL BRING FORTH A SON! Man may say God doesn't move like that anymore, but God says I WANT TO DO IT IF YOU WILL ONLY BELIEVE!

I thank you Jesus today and always for the victory!

1Pe 5:6-10 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time. Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist stedfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world. But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you.

AMEN!

This song really blesses me and I wanted to share it with you. My first YouTube video! :)

"I Still Believe" ~ Jina McCool

T. D. Jakes - LOL

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 20:03:00 +0000

I posted these on the Child By Faith FB wall but thought it might be easier all together and in order! This is an AWESOME message about Faith, believing for the impossible, and Laughing Out Loud when God does something so outrageous in your life! I LOVE this message so much and know that it will encourage you and build your faith! There are 7 parts total that you can find on YouTube, but here are the 3 with the main message! His mouth doesn't follow the words so I just let it play while I did stuff around the house! Enjoy and LOL!

Gift Baskets for The Hubbel's

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Sun, 27 Feb 2011 01:49:00 +0000

Welcome to my next project! For weeks I have had the idea to help out The Hubbel's aka Coupon Mommy of 3 on FB. Their 3 year old daughter Emily has been diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer and is currently in VERY intense treatment! You can read Emily's story HERE I can't even imagine what this family is going through but I have an idea that I think may bring some sunshine to their lives.

I am starting a project called Gift Baskets for The Hubbel's. With your help I would like to send the Hubbels the BEST Easter Baskets EVER! There are 3 daughters and Mom and Dad! I know with your help we can make this project come to life!

Your thoughts and prayers are greatly appreciated! If you would like to contribute to the gift baskets please email me at Sarahsewta@yahoo.com with Gift Basket's for The Hubbel's in the topic box. I have also set up a chipin widget on the right where you can donate money if you feel to. Even if you can only give a dollar, every bit helps!

Thanks

I am a dreamer!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 19:24:00 +0000

I've had this thought bouncing around in my head for months. "I am a dreamer and Dustin is concrete." So what? Who cares? Big deal? I'm a dreamer remember, I don't need absolutes, just possibilities! But still this thought is nagging at me to write about, why? I have no idea but I feel compelled to write this. I'm not sure how this post will end up, but here goes ...

I love this picture, I think the girl looks like me! :)
http://www.laurensharon.etsy.com/

I am a dreamer! I suppose that is what makes me a good crafter. I see a vision and I make it come to life. I see the world in a rainbow of colors. Not always what it is, but what it has a possibility to become. I'm an optimist, always looking on the bright side. There's always something positive about every situation. Sometimes you just have to look for it. Sometimes you may never know what it is. But it's there! I always look on the bright side. Even when I know people are wrong I still give them the benefit of the doubt and like to believe they had good intentions and meant well. This is both a gift and a flaw, but there it is.

I also am a dreamer in the spiritual world. God speaks to me in dreams. Not every night. Not every month. But often I am awakened with a dream or vision from the Lord. I see things that are going to happen. I see and feel things that people are going through. Many times I have dreampt of giving birth and holding my child in my arms! AH those dreams are so wonderful I never want to wake up. These dreams can be very cool, but they can also be exhausting! I don't always see good things. I don't always see happy things! Some of the time these are heavy burdens that God has laid upon me to pray about. To intercede for someone. To stand in the gap. These are private things that I cannot share with anyone and most of the time I never tell a person I have had a vision about them, I just wait and pray. Sometimes I see it come to pass right away, sometimes it's years. And thankfully sometimes it never comes to pass because God has conquered and changed the circumstances!

Please do not think in any way that I am saying I am "super spiritual" or a prophet or anything like that! Nothing could be further from the truth. I'm just saying this is one way that God speaks with me.

http://www.inflower.etsy.com/

Dustin on the other hand is concrete! A realist! He sees the world in black and white. Right or wrong. And yes I believe in right or wrong, but he is so absolute about it. From a young child he has had a wisdom that far precedes his age. Many older people have been jealous of his gift. I've never told him this, but I compare him to King Solomon in the bible (minus all the wives lol). He can process all aspects of a situation in record time and give a rational answer that you just can't argue with. He does not look at life through emotion, but by truth. Sometimes he's so unemotional about a situation I could scream! But his wisdom is always sound.

I asked him once how he encourages himself about God healing me and giving us a baby and he said "I don't think about it. God said it and it will happen" WHAT?!?! You don't think about it EVER!?!?! I think about it every hour, every minute of every day. SERIOUSLY NEVER?!?! "Nope, there's no need. It will happen when God is ready!" Oh I am SO envious of this! To be able to lay it all at God's feet and NEVER again worry, doubt, question... I am striving for this, but am far from there!

I often wonder why such a wise man would want someone so abstract and flighty as me. It's NOT RATIONAL!! We are opposites in nearly every area of our lives. Every area except one, that we love God with EVERY ounce of our being and yes we BOTH put God before each other! He helps me see the world through reality and truth, and I help him see the world as possibilities waiting to happen. I know all the time he is frustrated with me, and to be honest I am frustrated with myself alot of the time. I compare myself to him way to much, and see all the area's where I have failed miserably. I cannot always give the person the answer they are looking for. I don't have wisdom to make all the right choices. I hardly can quote any scriptures and half the time I can't even remember the scriptures he preached on. Only that I was moved and God changed me because of it. Try as I may I cannot be like Dustin.

So I am learning to let God use me in His own way, and it doesn't have to look like what it does with the next person. I don't have to be the preacher for God to speak through me. God is so much bigger and stronger then we can ever imagine. So why do we think Christians should look and act like we were cut out of cookie cutters. Dustin is definately used by God, but I also am someone God can use. So I'm trying to stop comparing myself and allowing God to use me how HE wants and it's VERY freeing and liberating! I don't have to live up to man's expectations of what I should be, but I can live up to God's! How beautiful!

Prayer buddies!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Sat, 19 Feb 2011 23:22:00 +0000

This has been an awful week. Infact it is by far the worst week I've had all winter! First off I've been very sick with a bad cough. Thankfully the fever only lasted a few days, but this cough just doesn't want to go away. Secondly I am having the worst period I've had in over a year. Are the two related, who really knows. On a good month I might be a little bummed because of course this is the last thing I want to happen. But where I started out a little down, I seemed to slip down that slippery slope very quickly. My husband will tell you I have been unbearably cranky and moody!! In constant pain and very irritable. I can't seem to focus on anything for more then 5 minutes and I ask the same questions over and over without processing any answer or response. Remember my last post The Winter Blues! Yea I know ... Oh and I almost forgot, someone who thought they were giving me a "word from God" said to me that I don't have my baby yet because I'm not trusting God. Thank you for that! Why do people say mean rude things and try to pass it off as God's word? I HATE THAT!!! If you really thought I was doubting then you would have gotten further by saying "keep trusting in God! He cannot fail!" But no people tell you what they think you are doing wrong, not encourage you to do right. YES there is a difference!!!

Group Hug II (Limited Edition)
http://www.etsy.com/shop/barkingbirdart

So anyway I thought this would be the perfect time to write a post. Everything's not going great! I don't "feel" great! I don't even feel good! But I know God is Good! And that's all that really matters. Usually I am the encourager. I try to stay positive and upbeat, always ready with an encouraging word. But this week I just couldn't seem to keep myself above water. Yea I prayed, read my bible even fasted. Still after the second day of frustration and tears I decided it was time to bring in the reinforcements! I called my prayer buddies. A group of women who I know will pray for me at the drop of a hat. A non judgemental zone where I can go and be honest and real without fear of being laughed at, mocked or rebuked for "not being spiritual enough." Within minutes I started to feel the pressure break and peace come in. Several calls, emails and prayers throughout the day made me feel stronger then I have in weeks. Although I do not "feel" great in body, I know all is well with my soul! I thank God for these GREAT Godly women he has put in my life that know how to nurture and love their own, and not kill and destroy like I have sadly seen in so many churches.

One friend even told me that God showed her the spiritual attack my husband and I have been under and she really began to weep and pray for us. Our baby IS on the way! God HAS NOT failed me! I AM NOT doubting!! And yes I have forgiven those that have wronged me. Sometimes people don't realize how bad their words hurt!

So I leave you with these thoughts! Things don't have to go great for God to be great! I don't have to fight my battles alone! Choose wisely what words you use! Love unconditionally without judging, after all you want mercy for yourself! Give someone a hug just because! Praise God through the storm for the sun will shine in the morning! Keep enduring, for you may not see your answer now but that doesn't mean it's not on the way! Believe that all things are possible!

Love you all! And a special thank you to my prayer buddies!

The Winter Blues

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Wed, 02 Feb 2011 14:46:00 +0000

I know it's been a long time since I've written. And I really feel like I need to get back on track! So here's my thought for today ...

http://www.etsy.com/shop/leenthegraphicsqueen

I remember as a child my mom always seemed to get the winter blues from January - March. I would roll my eyes and think to myself "it's that time of year, here we go again" Of course I would never speak such a thing out loud, but the thoughts were there!

The last few years I have begun to understand what it was. Here in Maine the winters can be nasty. Lots of cold snowy days. Icy roads. Praying that the pipes won't freeze and bust. That you'll have enough oil to make it through the winter. That your car will stay on the road and not slip all over the place, always cautious for the driver who has 4 wheel drive and thinks they are invincible. The list goes on and on but the worst for me is the sunshine! I MISS THE SUNSHINE!!! Even on a sunny day it's usually pretty hazy and overcast. And I begin to understand what Mom was going through. The winter blues!

And of course that will lead to my favorite time of year being spring. I love being able to go outside with only a sweater on. I love seeing the tiny crocuses bud through the snowy grass, bringing hope that a new season has come. There's just something about spring that makes me feel alive and joyful. But until then I must endure the winter. Many days I find myself wishing it away and praying for spring to come early.

Recently a friend of my, also TTC, and I were complaining about the winter and joking that we would like to skip Feb all together. Well another lady in the church, kinda like a mother figure to us, gently reprimanded us and said "Come on you two cowards. Whats up with Feb. Don't we all serve the same God and don't you know that whatever is in Feb He planned for you to either teach you or bless you and if you miss it you'll miss His perfect plan. What if Feb was the month of conceivement for either of you MaMa's to be; would you miss it. Don't ever let me hear you say you'd give up one precious day that our Jesus would give to you..what is that all about? I'm 63 and value life and am watching a precious lady I've known most of that life heading into her final days and I know she'd give anything for one more kiss from her precious husband and one more day to me a ma'ma to her children...I'm spanking both of you!"

Tears! Tears of repentance! Tears of thankfulness that she wasn't afraid to speak the truth! Tears of thankfulness that Jesus loves me so much that he would send this reminder to me that everyday is precious! Those words ate at me the whole day. I couldn't sleep at all, tossing and turning. Thinking of that "spiritual spanking" I had just received! And like a child throwing a fit it snapped me out of my temper tantrum! (So thanks Sister!) I woke up with the scripture on my mind:

Psa 118:24 This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Thank God for today, and find something to rejoice in!

***UPDATE*** My friend actually did conceive at the end of Feb/ beginning of March. The time she was wishing away was actually the time God had planned to bless her. Hold fast to the promises God has made to you and believe! This could be YOUR TIME for God bless you!
~Sarah

My Story - Part 8 ... Nothing shall be impossible ...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Mon, 01 Nov 2010 14:41:00 +0000

I have written my story in several parts because it is so long. You can read:
Part 1 HERE
Part 2 HERE
Part 3 HERE
Part 4 HERE
Part 5 HERE
Part 6 HERE
Part 7 HERE

For years I have suffered with chronic fatigue and insomnia. I always figured it was because of all my surgeries, but it got so bad my primary care physician sent me to a neurologist. He did several tests and discovered that I had heart disease and sent me to a cardiologist. He said in a 30 minute test my heart beat was completely chaotic and no two beats were the same. I guess he was very concerned, I wasn't, because he made an emergency appointment for me for the next day. I took the stress test and I was very healthy by that standard! Ha I knew it! But he wanted to do the tilt table test. I told him fine whatever, there was nothing wrong with me anyway! The tilt table was to prove whether my BP dropped low enough for me to have fainting spells. Come on this is not Hollywood, I DO NOT FAINT!! I endured the test and used every bit of will power I had. I was going to prove him wrong. Finally after over a half hour, he put nitro under my tongue, and I passed out within seconds! Let me tell you the movies have it all wrong! There is nothing graceful about it at all. I had the worst headache EVER and just wanted to vomit. He was almost laughing at me after the test. He had never seen someone with so much will power to fight! LOL Guess he didn't know all that I had already been through and I had to have will power to survive. I was diagnosed with NeuroCardiogenic Syncope. A fancy name for saying that my BP drops too low and I faint. Seriously I was being diagnosed with a fainting disease. I thought it sounded stupid. (As you know by now I'm not very good when doctor's try to diagnose me. LOL)

I was put on a bunch of Blood Pressure pills, and as much as I hate to admit it, I did feel a lot better! I had always had low BP, but now that my large intestines were gone I had a hard time absorbing liquids, so my veins couldn't pump my blood to my head fast enough. It's not really as bad as it sounds. When I get up too fast, all my blood rushes to my feet and kinda sits there for a few seconds. Then my heart has to work super hard to try to get it to come back up. During those few seconds my brain doesn't have enough oxygen and I black out. Usually I can feel it happen and I have a split second to grab the wall or something until it passes. A few times it has caught me off guard and I fell on the floor, usually bumping my head pretty hard. (shh don't tell my doctor! LOL)

About a year and a half after I was diagnosed with heart disease I had a vision. Before I go on I should tell you it's pretty common for me to have visions and dreams. I usually have one every couple months or so. It just seems to be one of the ways God talks to me. Anyway so I had a vision and there were alot of things he showed me. And one of them was that I am already healed. I no longer have to rely on doctors for treatment. Just because I can't see the miracle yet, doesn't mean it's not there! I just have to stand with every ounce of my being, and believe! Don't look at circumstances or what my body is telling me, but trust what God has told me. He promised me a son was on the way, and my body is completely made whole. He was even going to grow back my intestines, and men and doctor's will wonder at the miracle he has done! AWESOME!

Well I was so excited when I woke up. Many people had told me these same things, but somehow God had made it so real to me. God has never lied to me, or failed me. So I took this vision to heart. I once again threw away ALL my medicine. I started buying maternity clothes and baby stuff. I was walking by faith that I was healed! I made an appointment with the cardiologist and told him I stopped my meds. He did a bunch of tests and told me I was healthy and if I was doing so well without the medication, I didn't need to take them anymore. He also showed me a picture from my first test and my most recent test. The most recent scan had showed perfect heart beats for a 30 minute period. Truly a miracle! God had done it again!

I was really hoping that I would see results of the baby immediately, but it was not to be. It has been over 2 years since this happened. But I have not doubted and wavered. I KNOW what God said! He promised to heal my womb and give me a son, and I KNOW it will happen! He promised to grow back my intestines, and every morning I look for that to happen! I don't know how or when these things will happen. All I know is that God told me to stand and believe that I am already healed and these things ARE going to happen!

God has been so good to me and healed me many times. He has also given me many promises of what is to come, if I have enough faith to believe! I truly thank God for all he has brought me through and the lessons he has taught me along the way. I don't wish any of these trials away because God has used them to make me who I am today. I KNOW he can heal diseases, he healed ME! I KNOW he can heal cancer, he healed ME! I KNOW he can deliver from addictions, he healed ME! I KNOW he can over write doctor's reports, he has done it to me over and over again! And I KNOW I will have my own child soon! He has NEVER failed me and I KNOW HE NEVER WILL!

Thank you for reading my story! It has meant so much to me to share it with you! I'd love to read any comments you have! God Bless you and remember:

Luke 1:37

For with God nothing shall be impossible!

Take God out of that box!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Thu, 28 Oct 2010 17:19:00 +0000

Our human minds can not fully comprehend all that God is! We limit God by what we think he can do. We can't imagine the things he is able to do, so we don't. We don't even think about what he is capable of, because it doesn't even occur to us to believe for it.

I'm gonna throw some of you for a loop on this one so be prepared! I have learned to expect the unexpected from God. He NEVER does anything the way I think, and especially WHEN I think He will! I've learned to be open minded about His will in my life, and accept the outrageous! I have learned to take God out of that box I put Him in, and given Him FULL control and power. And as you've read the results have been out of this world. But I'm not done, and neither is God. I am not just believing for God to give us a baby, but I am believing that I will be made whole. YES even to the extent that my left fallopian tube and all my intestines will grow back, and even to the extent that all my scars will be gone! Is anything impossible with God? NO! Why limit God to making me feel better today, when He is wanting to do so much more for me. He doesn't want me to live in sickness and disease. He doesn't want me to live in poverty. He doesn't want me to live with a broken heart. He doesn't want me to have doubt and unbelief. It is NOT his will! But He can't do these miracles if I don't allow Him. If I don't believe!

Mark 10:27 And Jesus looking on them saith, with men it is impossible, but not with God. For with God all things are possible.

Matthew 18:19 Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my father which is in heaven.

So it's up to me to believe and allow God to do the work! Simple really! Take God out of that box and see what He wants to do for YOU! Not only will you be amazed, but you will be blessed beyond your wildest dreams!

I'd love to hear what you are believing for and stand with you!

My Story - Part 7 ... got faith? ...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Wed, 27 Oct 2010 19:49:00 +0000

My story has been a long journey so I decided to write it out in several different posts. You can read them:
Part 1 HERE

I still have so many stories about my life, but I thought I would take a short pause and talk about how to walk by faith. I am not the preacher in the family but I will try to do my best! :) There is a difference between speaking positive and speaking faith! Speaking positive is having confidence in yourself that you can keep yourself encouraged. Speaking faith is having confidence in God that He will take care of every situation. How comforting that I don't have to rely on myself!

The Bible is full of so many encouraging stories it would be impossible for me to quote them all. But if you don't know where to start just go to the new testament. Even if you've read it before you will be encouraged and excited by what Jesus does.

Hebrews 13:8 Jesus Christ the same yesterday, today and forever.

Acts 10:34 ... God is no respecter of persons.

You have to believe not only that God did these miracles, but that he still wants to do them today. He is wanting to do them for YOU! They are not just old stories that happened long ago. But they are here to encourage us that God CAN do these things and WILL do them if we believe!

Mat 9:28 And when he was come into the house, the blind men came to him: and Jesus saith unto them, Believe ye that I am able to do this? They said unto him, Yea, Lord.
Mat 9:29 Then touched he their eyes, saying, According to your faith be it unto you.
Mat 9:30a And their eyes were opened;

When I was diagnosed with cancer (part 6 above) and in tons of pain I had to have complete confidence in God! If I had accepted that I had cancer I'm positive the outcome would have been completely different. I had prayed and belived for a miracle, now every day after I had to walk in it! I couldn't respond by what I felt or saw. But I responded by what I hoped and believed to be true. I believed I was healed so every day I said, "Thank you Jesus I am healed!"

2 Corinthians 5:7 For we walk by faith not by sight!
Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

I had to believe for the impossible! I had to believe that it WAS possible!

Luke 1:37 For with God NOTHING shall be impossible!

Everyday I couldn't focus on the negativity or the pain. I couldn't focus on what the doctor's report said. And even worse I couldn't focus on what my mind was trying to tell me. Once you let your mind go down that path, it spirals downhill very fast! This is one of my favorite scriptures that I quoted EVERY single day!

Phillipians 4:6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

Phillipians 4:7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Phillipians 4:8 Finally, bretheren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report: if there be any virtue, if there be any praise, think on these things!

Somedays are easier to stand then others. We all have bad days. I have several friends that are prayer buddies. I can call them anytime day or night and they will pray with me and encourage me. Sometimes just knowing someone else is standing with me is all the strength I need! We NEED each other!

Galatians 6:2a Bear ye one another's burdens.

And finally you have to have a determination that no matter what comes your way, you KNOW God cannot fail you! Sometimes situations look like God has forsaken us, but HOLD TIGHT to your faith! You KNOW he cannot fail and your miracle is on the way! I've been waiting almost 14 years. Think how close I am! What if I give up and today was supposed to be my day? All those years of believing would be for nothing! I CAN'T give up now! It is NOT an option!! I wake up every morning and say to God, "Thank You Jesus for my baby! I KNOW he's on the way! Help me to stand and not doubt or waiver!" Reading your bible every day, or night, will bring you so much strength! (I also play christian music all day long!)

Eph 6:10 Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.

Eph 6:11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
Eph 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Eph 6:13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
Eph 6:14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
Eph 6:15 And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
Eph 6:16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
Eph 6:17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:
Eph 6:18 Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;

Above all else, Praise God! For he desires the praises of His people!

Psalms 28:6 Blessed be the LORD, because he hath heard the voice of my supplications.

Psalms 28:7 The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise him.

Here are some of my favorite scriptures in random order:

Hebrews 11:11 Through faith also Sarah herself received strength to conceive seed, and was delivered of a child when she was past age, because she had judged him faithful who had promised.

Mat 8:14 And when Jesus was come into Peter's house, he saw his wife's mother laid, and sick of a fever.

Mat 8:15 And he touched her hand, and the fever left her: and she arose, and ministered unto them.
Mat 8:16 When the even was come, they brought unto him many that were possessed with devils: and he cast out the spirits with his word, and healed all that were sick:
Mat 8:17 That it might be fulfilled which was spoken by Isaiah the prophet, saying, Himself took our infirmities, and bare our sicknesses.

Isaiah 53:5 But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities, The chastisement of our peace was upon Him, and with His stripes we are healed.

Matthew 14:14 And Jesus went forth and saw a great multitude, and was moved with compassion toward them, and he healed their sick.

Psalms 30:2 O LORD my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.

Psalms 30:3 O LORD, thou hast brought up my soul from the grave: thou hast kept me alive, that I should not go down to the pit.

Psa 107:19 Then they cry unto the LORD in their trouble, and he saveth them out of their distresses.

Psa 107:20 He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.

Jeremiah 17:14 Heal me oh LORD and I shall be healed, save me and I shall be saved, for thou art my praise.

I could go on and on but you get the idea! God can do anything if only WE believe!

I believe!

Continue to Part 8 HERE!

Whitaker Imagery

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Wed, 27 Oct 2010 12:25:00 +0000

Hey family and friends! I've got some things to do today and don't have my next post ready yet, so in the mean time I thought I'd introduce you to Deb!

Deb is the photographer from Whitaker Imagery who took our family photo's a few weeks ago! Well look how cute this picture came out of me and my sisters, and Nana (mom)!

S, Me, R and Nana!

Whitaker Imagery is having a referral contest on her FB page and I would REALLY like to win a FREE session for me and Dustin! We haven't had our pictures taken together since before I got sick. Yea we are over due!

PLEASE help us out and go like her fan page HERE and tell her I sent you! Thank you so much!

I will try to post more of my story later! :) Have a wonderful day!

My Story - Part 6 ... Chemo and the "C" word ...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Tue, 26 Oct 2010 12:41:00 +0000

My testimony is so long I have broken it up into parts! You can read:
Part 1 HERE
Part 2 HERE
Part 3 HERE

Part 4 HERE

Part 5 HERE

Because I had had so many complications after my surgeries I was sent to another specialist in Boston. He thought I should try a new Chemo treatment that was used to treat Crohn's. I technically am diagnosed with undetermined Crohn's/Colitis because all my tests show inconclusive results. So I agreed to try the chemo and see if it would help. I became so deathly ill and most of my hair fell out. I couldn't imagine why anybody on earth would agree to do this. After the first round of treatments my body had not responded the way they had hoped, so we all agreed to stop them.

Dustin, Sarah and Mazie!

Shortly after J.T. left I went to see an infertility specialist. (I have NEVER claimed that I have infertility! To be infertile is to be unable to become pregnant. And I believe that I will be able to become pregnant. I always tell my nieces and nephews, some babies just take longer to grow.) I knew I wasn't really healthy at the time, but wanted to start the process and see what they could do. Ever since I was a teenager I had a problem with ovarian cysts on my right side. When I was very sick, thankfully, most of this calmed down. But the healthier I got, the worse these became. The infertility doctor determined that I had a blockage in my left tube and a dysfunctional right ovary. Neither side was working properly. Also TONS of scar tissue was blocking the eggs from even getting to the tubes. The cysts on my right ovary had developed into strange looking black masses. They told me black always means cancer. The "mass" (I NEVER claimed it was cancer!) was totally surrounding the ovary and it would have to be removed, as well as the left tube. A left ovary and a right tube doesn't make a great recipe for conception. I was not pleased. The "mass" was extremely painful and was pinching the nerves in my right arm. I needed another miracle!

I went home and quoted every scripture I remembered about faith and believing for the impossible!(I will make a post with them all!) I fasted and prayed asking God to show me His plan in my life.

At the same time my pastor's wife and another woman in church were diagnosed with Breast Cancer. The three of us went in front of church and were prayed for and anointed with oil.

Jas 5:14 Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord:

Jas 5:15 And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him.
Instantly ALL the pain left my body! This is the first time I had ever felt a healing. It was amazing! The other two women reported the same thing! All three of us had been healed of cancer!

I called my doctor and told her nothing would be there, that I was healed! She still wanted to do the surgery and make sure, she didn't really believe me. I decided to go ahead and have the surgery, that way she would KNOW what God had done for me. I had the surgery and she was amazed! NO MASS! Not even a hint that one had ever been there! THANK YOU JESUS!! They did remove my left tube because it was slightly open and if I got pregnant on that side it would 100% be a tubal pregnancy, and they knew emotionally I could not handle that. My doctor tried to say after the surgery that they had mistaken shadows for a tumor, but the ultrasound tech would not budge. She knew what she saw and it wasn't a shadow!! I wish I had the pictures to post for you!

Two years later I was having pain again in my shoulder. I went to my OB/GYN and he did an ultrasound. It showed another mass over 10cm. In cyst world this is HUGE! It was very dangerous and would need to be removed. And of course they always like to throw in the "C" word whenever they can. I knew God had already healed me and there was no reason for me to have surgery. I went to church to get prayed for again and I knew God would do it. I told my doctor I was healed and he wouldn't need to do surgery. He was not convinced. So I told him to take another ultrasound and he would see. The new ultrasound showed that the mass was growing even bigger. But I did not falter. Every day for a month I cried and prayed, Lord I know you healed me and I don't want to have another surgery. Whenever I felt pain in my body, I would not acknowledge the pain, but I would say, "Thank you Jesus I am healed". Some days the pain was so bad but still all day long I would only say "Thank you Jesus I am healed" over and over and over. The day of surgery was approaching and I was getting upset. There was no need to have surgery if nothing was there! So I prayed and asked God to give me peace. And I heard a voice answer back, "I'm going to use you to show other people a miracle" Thank You! Now I felt that the surgery had a purpose, it was not for nothing! The day of my surgery I told my doctor there would be nothing there. I was still in pain, but was believing God for a complete healing. He had tears in his eyes and told me he had not slept all weekend because he was trying to figure out how to save my ovary. I only had a right tube, so the right ovary is essential! I just smiled back at him. Time would tell. I wish I could have seen his face after surgery! He came out to the waiting area and just shrugged. There was nothing there! HAHAHA Oh God is so good. Although the doctor never did admit to me it was a miracle I knew God was talking to him.

Just recently I had another ultrasound and they found another "mass". I went back to the same doctor and he just said, I am not worried. I know with you there's really nothing there!!! Even my doctor is now speaking faith! Hahahaha I love it!!

I am so thankful that my pastor taught me not to have confidence in a doctor's report, but to have confidence in God! What a GREAT and MIGHTY God I serve!! It does not matter what situations come your way, or what death sentence a doctor tries to put on you! God's word says to speak life!

Pro 18:21a Death and life are in the power of the tongue:

I SPEAK LIFE!

Continue to Part 7 HERE!

My Story - Part 5 ...And adoption story... well sort of...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 12:20:00 +0000

I know this seems so long already, but I have left out so much! You can read:

Part 1 HERE

Part 2 HERE

Part 3 HERE
Part 4 HERE

During my sickness all I could think about was having a child. Children are such a blessing, and somehow in my crazy mind I convinced myself that if I had a child, that would mean I was healthy. Because I still weighed less then 100 lbs the not so important parts of my body shut down. So I began to pray that we would be able to adopt. I'm going to keep most of this info general for the privacy of those involved.

My dear boy J.T. was born in October 2001. He was 10 weeks premature and couldn't remember how to eat or breath. He stopped breathing atleast 10 times an hour. It really wasn't as scary as it sounds because he was on an apnea monitor and as soon as it would beep, he would jump and start breathing again. J.T. was my life! I had only had surgery 6 weeks prior to him being born, but all of a sudden nothing about me mattered! He was my world! Really things had felt so bad for so many years, this was my first real ray of sunshine!

I was so in love with this child I can't even begin to write about it. He was so fragile, and he needed me. I finally felt like I had a purpose. I rocked to him and sang to him. Prayed with him and cried with him. A biological mother could not love their child more! I knew within the first week that it didn't look like we were going to be able to adopt him, but how could I leave this precious little boy? My boy? I couldn't! So I went every day, not knowing if it was the last kiss I could give him. The last prayer I could say with him. The last time I would ever hold him and tell him how much I love him. Still I went because none of that mattered. All that mattered was he was struggling for his life and needed me.

Like most premies J.T. struggled with his vitals. There was just too much for his poor little body to do. The nurses tried their best but for some reason I was the only person who was able to stabalize him. I held him in the kangaroo position, skin on skin, and his vitals would be perfect. Somehow my body knew how to regulate his temperature and blood pressure. His breathing became more regular and he was able to rest. I know this was a match made in heaven and God put us together! WHEW even after 9 years I cannot write this without crying! He was my boy!

We were able to raise our dear son for almost a year, and when he left he was very healthy and his doctor's were amazed at how well he had grown and developed. They had never seen anything like it. I still feel blessed that God allowed me to be part of his life! And although losing him was an enormous loss in my life, being his mother even for a short time was an even bigger gain. I honestly believe God sent him to me to save my life as well. It help me to forget what was going on with me, and to focus on someone else for a change. I have never been the same since!

Also during this year God called Dustin to be a co-pastor. It was not an easy journey for us, but we knew what God wanted of us and we could not fail Him, no matter the what came our way. I am happy to say that we did follow God, and in the process met the most wonderful Pastor in the world. My pastor! Up until this point I believed circumstances came our way and we had no control over them. But he taught us that we don't have to accept circumstances and doctor's reports, but to have faith in God and believe for a miracle. This is when I began my walk of faith and started believing we would have a child of our own. And many more miracles were headed our way as well!

Continue to Part 6 HERE!

My Story - Part 4 ... my darkest days, and God's forgiveness ...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Sun, 24 Oct 2010 12:51:00 +0000

My story is so long I've broken it up into parts! You can read:
Part 1 HERE
Part 2 HERE
Part 3 HERE

This part is probably one of the hardest parts of my life to share. Mostly pride and shame are the reasons. But I believe it may help someone else and so I am willing to share it.

I did not always serve Jesus. I grew up believing in Him, and thought that was enough. I was a servant to myself. I did whatever I wanted, and made many bad decisions. The guilt of these decisions drove me to make even worse decisions until I was filled with so much self loathing and hate. I needed deliverance from myself. I needed a savior. Once I finally decided to serve God I knew I couldn't do it half hearted. God was helping me make better choices. He was helping me clean up my life, but it was many many years before I would learn to forgive myself.

I've always loved this picture!
When I fail he is right there ready to
forgive.

The guilt and self hatred I felt, mixed with all the pain from my surgeries led me to become a drug addict. Prescription medication is the proper term, but they were drugs, and I couldn't stop. I've asked myself over and over how a person trying to serve God to the best of their ability can become a drug addict. The answer is pretty simple actually. I started looking at the circumstances around me and not trusting God. I made excuses that I was in pain and needed them. And I WAS in pain. ALOT of pain. Both emotionally and physically. I started to have a fear that if I was in this much pain with the pills, what would I feel like without the pills? And I started taking more, just to be safe. After all more pills means less pain right?

I became cranky, mean, unapproachable. I knew what I was doing and nobody was going to tell me what was best for me. I was in pain and needed them, and that was that! I learned many tricks to get more drugs. (which I will not share! LOL) I had them stashed everywhere. In drawers, in closets, in clothes, under the bed. No matter where I was in the house I had a stash of pills close by, just in case. I even went so far as to carry them around the house and sleep with them. YES I WAS AN ADDICT! I'm sure Dustin threw away many bottles and hid them from me as best as I could. But every time he tried to talk to me about it I got angry and yelled, how dare he tell me I wasn't in pain. I had been through so much, didn't I deserve a break?

Our marriage became rocky. Not because he didn't love me, but because I convinced myself that he didn't love me. I became friends with people that were not good for me, and who didn't like Dustin. They convinced me he didn't trust me, and I believed them. I began to aim all my hatred and guilt at him. I made him the bad guy.

But even when we falter and stumble, God is close by. He brought a convicted drug dealer to our church fresh out of prison. This person got saved and began to witness to me. I had been going to church for years. I knew God! But God used this man to soften my heart. He began to tell me I had all the behaviors of being a drug addict. I was appalled! How could a Christian woman become an addict while serving God? But I knew in my heart it was true! I fell down on the floor and repented and asked God to help me. Then I did the only thing I could. I dumped all the pills in the toilet. I knew if I kept them around they would be a temptation. And the amazing thing was, I NEVER felt worse when I stopped taking them. Day by day I began to feel better. I had allowed the pills to hold me in bondage. And God used a drug dealer to witness to me. Although you may feel like you have nothing to offer, you never know who needs YOU!

Now that I was not snowed under I had to face reality. And that was I needed forgiveness. Not only from God but from myself. I wish I could tell you that this happened over night. But this was a long, slow, painful process. In order to forgive myself, I had to first accept that God forgave me. And when God forgives, he forgets, it's just like it never happened. I didn't have to repent over and over for my sins. I didn't have to beat myself up for the mistakes I made. I didn't have to see them for stumbling blocks, but use them as stepping stones to help me grow and change and be a better person. Forgiving myself is a daily step in my walk with Christ. I don't have to relive all my mistakes everyday. But everyday I do wake up and thank God for saving me from myself.

I also began working on my marriage. Love is a choice. And I could choose to love this man, or get a divorce. I chose to give love a try. I made myself tell Dustin everyday that I loved him and he was the best thing that ever happened to me. I didn't believe a word of it, but I thought if I said it enough it might become true. I called him at work just to tell him I was thinking about him. I wrote him notes in his lunch to have a good day. Slowly I began to let the walls come down and I began to see him through new eyes. He wasn't the bad guy, and neither was I. We had just been through 6 horrible years and it takes a toll, both physically and emotionally. But we were determined to make it work, and God renewed our love for each other and began to remove the sadness. And today we are so close and love each other more then anyone else in the world.

God's forgiveness is beautiful, and he is right there waiting for you to come to him. We all struggle with things in our lives. We all have followed the wrong path and have strayed. We all have had days where we didn't treat people like we should. Let today be the day you begin to change. Whether you serve God everyday, have walked away from him, or never knew him. It doesn't matter. He's waiting for you to come to him. Don't hesitate or wonder what people around you might think. Just do what you know in your heart is right. Put down that thing that has held you in bondage. Make a conscious effort to tell someone you haven't told in a while, that you love them. Don't let another day go by. Let today be YOUR day.

"Lord, I thank you that I have gone through these trials. They have shown me that no matter what, you love me. In my darkest days, you are there for me. Forgive me Lord for the things I stumble on and help me grow and learn that I can put my trust and confidence in you. I have many weaknesses Lord, and I need your help to over come them. Thank you for showing me the way. Thank you for your daily guidance and instruction. And most of all your forgiveness, which I am so undeserving of. And you offer so freely. In Jesus' name AMEN!"

***DISCLOSURE*** I am in no way telling anybody to throw away their pills. I am only sharing what happened in my life.
Continue to Part 5 HERE!

My Story - Part 3 ... sometimes you have to laugh

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Sat, 23 Oct 2010 12:28:00 +0000

I am writing my story out in parts because it is so long. You can read Part 1 HERE and Part 2 HERE!

300 days in the hospital is exhausting!

I used to remember every statistic and every detail, but thankfully time has a way of making you forget the awfulness that happens. So I will sum it up as best as I can. I spent almost an entire year in Boston, as previously stated. Then 5 more years going back and forth every month. I still weighed only 78 lbs. I just couldn't gain weight no matter what awful shake or concoction I tried. And let me tell you everybody and their brother had some magic potion for gaining weight. It was exhausting. I had a total of 18 abdominal surgeries for Crohn's and complications. I still wanted a baby desperately and so that became my focus. I became consumed with having a baby. Everything else was so dark and depressing that I focused on getting better so I could get pregnant. Of course we couldn't really "try" because I was so sick, but hey one can hope, right!!

Finally one ileostomy bag was reversed, but I still had the other one. Living with an ileostomy bag isn't really something you can prepare yourself for. Looking back I can honestly say that 90% is your mental outlook. If I let it overwhelm me, I fell apart. But when I started looking at it as just another way to go to the bathroom, it wasn't so bad. I'll tell some funny stories for you:

Our life for almost 6 years!

One day I was holding my son J.T. (I'll write about him later) in church. I stood up to testify and felt something warm and gooey running down my leg, I said to myself, "oh crap" and looked down and my shoe was filled with, yup you guessed it, poop! LOL The baby had jumped on my leg and popped the clip off and poop was all over me, the floor, the baby .... everywhere. Gotta laugh!!

Someone told me it was easier to empty the ostomy bag standing up. I tried it, but the poop missed most of the toilet, and what did hit the toilet made a big splash all over me and the walls. It took a long time to clean it all up! EEWWW I don't think the person who told me that had ever tried it.

I LOVE sleeping on my stomach. Always have. Well I've learned to sleep at a bit of an angle with a pillow supporting me because in the early days I would lay on the bag and it would literally "blow up" and we would wake up covered in poo. AAHH gotta love this new life!

Some brilliant person told me to "burp" the bag. Which is to let some of the gas out so you don't have to go to the bathroom and empty it. If you've never smelt poop from an ostomy bag then it's hard to explain. It's from higher up in your intestines so the food is partially digested, very acidic and extremely runny. The smell is absolutely horrid. So one night I was in bed and so tired I decided to give the bag a "burp". Well the smell was so bad I pulled the covers way up to my neck to get away from it. Sadly Dustin didn't realize what I had done and he pulled the covers high over his head, poor thing. He woke up so fast and jumped from the bed throwing the blankets on the floor. Not only had he stuck his head right in the smell, but also some of the stool had run all over the sheets. I have never tried to "burp" again!

I could go on and on but you get the idea, it takes some adjustment. And don't believe everything you hear! LOL

Thankfully I married a man with a sense of humor!
I love him so much!

They tried several times to reverse the bag but I kept getting rectal/vaginal fistulas. Basically I pooped where I should have peed. It was very gross and uncontrollable. Any time I walked, turned or basically moved I pooped down my leg. EEWWW My doctor was convinced that the J-Pouch should work and put me through an incredible amount of tests, procedures and pain. Finally I told him enough is enough and I wasn't going through with it any more. We could no longer try to have a baby because, YES I was even pooping on my husband. That was the final straw for me. After much begging I was given a permanent ileostmy bag and the J-Pouch was removed. The doctor's found a hole the size of a quarter in the pouch. I had walked around for 6 years with a hole the size of a quarter in my intestines and NEVER got toxic! THAT IS A MIRACLE!!! It should have killed me within minutes, but I went 6 years. WOW!!

Because I had been in the hospital so much, and Dustin left my side as little as possible, we were behind on our bills. We got a letter from the bank saying we had to pay three months rent or they were going to foreclose. We had no money, all we could do was pray. Three days before the money was due Dustin's work took up a collection for him. They raised enough money for us to catch up on all our bills, buy food, and pay our tithes. And there was still money left over. God was teaching me to trust Him in every area of my life. What a Great and Mighty God I serve! Sometimes He uses the most unexpected places for His will to be done! I Love Him so much!

Continue to Part 4 HERE!

My Story - Part 2 ... 300 days and counting ...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Fri, 22 Oct 2010 13:07:00 +0000

I've decided to share my story in parts because it is so long. If you missed part 1 you can read it HERE. And now for part 2!

I was so excited about seeing angels and Jesus that I never stopped thinking about it or talking about it. Those moments are what kept me going for a long time.

The surgery I had was to remove all my large intestines, and my appendix, and create a new rectum with small intestines, called a J-pouch. I was only going to have the ileostomy bag for 6-8 weeks while the pouch healed then it would be reversed. I didn't like the bag but since it was such a short time I really didn't give it much thought.

The chest tube was now ready to be removed, but my lung collapsed again as soon as they took it out. It was so painful I was so relieved to have it out, but now they wanted to put it back in. Hahaha Over my dead body, I told them! Well they finally convinced me to put in a smaller chest tube. It wasn't as effective but hopefully would still do the job. Since I was having a hard time breathing I agreed. The chest tube was a little scary because it was run with water. Most of the nurses had never seen one and were given classes periodically in my room. Every nurse tried to add or remove water. I, obviously, was at every class and soon began teaching the nurses how to use the equipment that was running my body. It was a quite surreal.

Me in ICU after my emergency surgery.

I was finally sent home after almost a month in the hospital. AH I was so homesick! But I wasn't able to keep any food down at all and after only a few days home I returned to Boston. Some more tests were done and the doctor's discovered a kink in my bowels. Since I was so sick and not doing well with the ileostomy, my surgeon decided to reverse the bag early! No problem here! I was all for it. Dustin decided to go back to work until my surgery, we knew the bills would be outrageous.

One morning after the doctor's morning rounds I began crying out in pain. After 5 shots of narcotics he realized something was seriously wrong. My mom says my eyes were rolling back in my head and I was still crying out in pain. A portable x-ray machine was brought to my room and they discovered my intestines had perforrated. I had just had a barium test and was told that it saved my life. If I had stool in my intestines it would have killed me within minutes. I was rushed to have emergency surgery. Dustin was called at work and told I would probably be dead before he arrived. He says it was the longest 3 hour drive of his life.

Me sitting up in ICU.

I woke up in ICU and patted my side, wondering if the ileostomy was gone. My mom told me no, and tears rolled down my cheek. The prednisone that I had been taking had eaten a hole in my intestines and they were not able to reverse the bag without making the damage worse, so they actually made a second ileostomy with the hole that perforrated. I looked down and saw and ileostomy bag on each side of my stomach.They couldn't sew the wound up because they had to let the poison drain out so I had a HUGE wound from my belly button down that was left open and held together with 4 wires. I also had 8 tubes in my body. My recovery was going to be incredibly long.

I went back and forth to Boston so much I kept track on a calender. I was there over 300 days out of 365. I stopped counting at 300 because it got depressing. I was over 3 hours away from friends, family and most of all church. I had believed in Jesus my whole life, but only had started serving Him in the past few years. (YES there is a HUGE difference. I will get into that more a little later.)

I had some Christian CD's (Darlene Zschech saved my life with her music) and my bible and had to keep myself encouraged as best as possible. I also sang this chorus over and over:

I love Him too much to fail Him now, too much to break my vow

For I promised the Lord that I would make it somehow

Now I love Him too much to fail Him now.

I didn't know if I would live or die, but I knew one thing for sure, I NEEDED God. I never blamed Him or got angry. I was just so thankful that He was there for me. I had served myself for many years and made so many bad decisions and had so much guilt. I was determined if I only lived a day, or lived 100 more years, I never wanted to go back to my old life. And somehow God gave me the strength to make it through! For many months the doctor's didn't know if I would live or die. Dustin and my mom were constantly being told to say goodbye, it was my last day. I clung to my vision of angels, read my bible every moment I could and basically prayed, Jesus help me. What else could I do? This was the beginning of my journey of walking by faith. I still only weighed 78 lbs. Needed help eating, bathing, walking and every basic thing in life we take for granted every day. It took all my strength to stand and pour a glass of water. I was taking 22 pills a day, and still had two ileostomy bags. I knew this couldn't last forever. I just had to hold on to Jesus and make it through.

Continue to Part 3 HERE!

My Story - Part 1 ... Angels among us

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Thu, 21 Oct 2010 23:18:00 +0000

I really want to share my story but it is very long so I'm going to be sharing it in several parts.

Dustin and I were married when I was 19 and he was 20. We thought we had life all figured out. We bought a house and a new truck. We both had fairly good jobs, life was going good. For the first year I didn't want children at all. I knew I was too young and didn't want all the work and trouble that came along with kids. Then all of a sudden it hit me. The baby fever. Out of the blue and totally unexpected this strong desire came to me. It was so overwhelming how strong the desire became. So Dustin and I decided to start trying. I had been on birth control so had to go off it and let it wear off. Within a few months I began feeling very sick and throwing up alot. I KNEW it had to be morning sickness!! I told everyone at work I must be pregnant because all I did was run to the bathroom. Month after month this went on and still no pregnancy.

I started having rectal bleeding and my mom became concerned and convinced me to go to the doctors. Two weeks later my test results were in. I went into the office and my doctor said, "You have Crohn's disease, have a nice day" WHAT?!?!?! She didn't tell me what it was or give me a paper or anything. I didn't know if I had a week to live or what. Thankfully I did have more then a week to live, but still the diagnosis was bad. My body made ulcers all through my intestines causing the bleeding and vomiting. I became VERY sick and soon had to quit my job.

In the mean time I had a pilonidal cyst on my tail bone. I had it removed 5 times in the office and it never went away so I finally had to go in the OR and have it surgically removed. The cyst was extremely painful and so was the Crohn's. I was on ALOT of steroids and other meds at the time. Dustin worked around the clock and didn't realize how sick I was. I was so sick and didn't realize he didn't know. At this time I could barely get out of bed. I had to roll on the floor and crawl to the bathroom, still vomiting and bloody diarrhea. I had sores all through my my mouth and throat, which felt like needles, and soon I couldn't even swallow water. The doctor's just kept telling me this is how the disease goes and it would be 10-15 years before I was sick enough for surgery. Finally I was hospitalized. I had lost a ton of weight and still couldn't swallow. My stool looked like tomato soup. My steroids and morphine were increased to the point that Dustin got very worried. He knew too much morphine was a death sentence. He begged that I be sent to Boston for a second opinion. The doctor was very angry, but after a week he finally agreed to send me. I was sent by ambulance with all meds locked out and without a chart. The EMT's were told I would be dead before I reached Boston and not to expect much from me. I remember how long that trip was. I couldn't have pain meds and I was so weak and tired.

When I arrived in Boston they were amazed I had made the trip. But unfortunately the hospital that sent me messed up my paperwork so they couldn't treat me immediately. They couldn't get my IV to work so they tried placing a central line, an IV in the main artery in my chest. I was so dehydrated and sick the line went through the vein and punctured my lung. Now I needed an emergency chest tube to drain the fluid and pump back up my lung. The chest tube was extremely painful. It was determined that I was indeed a candidate for surgery but was too sick and would probably die on the table, so they waited a week to give me fluids and TPN (IV nutrition). I underwent MANY tests that week, all miserable! My surgery was scheduled for the following Monday, but late Thursday we were told the Friday surgery was cancelled and I was bumped up. I was going to be given an ileostomy bag. It happened so fast I didn't even have time to process it all. But I was so sick I didn't care. I only weighed 78 lbs.

That night I died. (I didn't realize it at the time though) I can't even put into words what it felt like. It was so calm. I always say it was like being void of feeling or thought. Literally NO thought or feeling went through my mind or body. The true meaning of peace! I was standing on the roof of the hospital looking down at my body in the hospital bed. The room was glowing so bright I couldn't see the walls. There were 4 angels standing guard of my bed. Two at the head and two at the foot of the bed. They looked like HUGE men with blond hair and off white linen robes. They were standing shoulder to shoulder and I felt so safe. I felt a presence beside me and I realized that I was at Jesus' feet. I heard his voice say. "Sarah are you scared?" I answered, "No I see my angels and I feel peace" Then I woke up...

I didn't fully comprehend what had happened, but one thing was sure, I had seen angels and I HAD peace! God was with me and no matter what happened I knew everything was going to be OK. I told every person I came in contact with about my visit with angels. The story spread through the hospital and soon everybody knew what I had seen.

My surgery was alot more serious then anticipated. It lasted over 8 hours and finally late that night Dustin was allowed in the recovery room. He was crying. I don't remember him ever crying. He told me that my intestines were so diseased they were rotten. They were 4 inches in diameter and bright purple and fell apart in the doctor's hands as he removed them. He said I would not have lived through the weekend and made it to the original Monday surgery. All I could think about was the vision I had of Jesus and the angels! I thanked God all weekend for his mercy and love and for showing me He was with me. He knew what I would need for the days ahead.

Continue to Part 2 HERE!

Happy Birthday J.T.!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 15:18:00 +0000

9 years ago Dustin and I tried to adopt a baby. 9 years ago I today I became a mother! My dear little son J.T. was born! He was 10 weeks premature and weighed only 3.5 lbs. Since he was so early he was in a NICU (neonatal intensive care unit) for 8 weeks until he learned to breathe and eat on his own. He was so fragile and delicate and I loved him so much!

We lived almost an hour away from the hospital where he was so I went home every night and came back in the mornings for the day. (The hospital wouldn't let me stay because he I wasn't technically his parent yet) Leaving him was so hard, but I really needed the rest too because I was also sick at the time. But I didn't care. All I could think about was this precious little man that needed me, and I needed him. We were a match made in heaven!

Me holding J.T. in the kangaroo position to help with his vitals.

Many night's his vitals were not great and the nurses would call me and tell me I needed to come. As soon as I held him in the kangaroo position, skin on skin, his vitals imediately went back to normal. The nurses were amazed that I seemed to be the only person that was able to get such a positive response from him. I sang to him and prayed with him, and he brought so much joy to my life it NEVER felt like a burden.

We were blessed to raise him for 10 months! And even knowing I could not keep him forever, I would do it again in a heartbeat! There is no feeling in the world greater then giving a child love! I am so thankful for the time we had with him and that we were able to help him at such a critical time in his life. And although I wish things had ended differently, I don't regret 1 moment!

Happy 9th Birthday J.T.! Mommy and Daddy miss you and love you very much!

I'm my own stumbling block sometimes ...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 20:33:00 +0000

I am my own stumbling block. I don't like to admit I have limits and I try to go above and beyond what I am physically able to do. I not only hurt myself by doing this, but I end up hurting those around me at the same time. Yes it's true that I've had 21 surgeries and have an ileostomy bag and am exhausted 90% of the time, but still that doesn't mean I have to stop living. For years I felt so bad for myself that I just laid in bed or on the couch totally depressed. But now I have learned that by speaking faith and trusting God I am able to do way more then I ever thought myself possible. But still I have limits. And I guess deep down to admit that if I have limits then I am also admitting that I am not healed or that my faith isn't totally in God. And I beat myself up about it and bring myself down.

So I'm working on realizing my limits, and trying to push past them with realistic goals. And I guess that's my real problem I feel it has to be all or nothing. I've never been one to settle for second best and that's what it feels like. I feel like Peter who walked on water. When my eyes are on God I am floating and feel GREAT! But the second I take my eyes off Him I start drowning and it takes everything within me to get back up. And God in His mercy picks me back up and helps me to walk again.

"And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea. And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear. But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid. And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water. And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus. But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me. And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?" Matthew 14 25-31

So my prayer today is:

"Lord help me to feel your strength and healing virtue. I know you are my healer and deliver and I do not have to accept the condition that my body is in! Help me to trust you completely and not make unrealistic goals for myself, so that I will later be disappointed in myself and beat myself up. But help me to keep my eyes on you, without doubt and fear. Knowing that you WILL heal my body and I WILL have a baby in your timing. And in the mean while help me not to be a stumbling block to myself and others. But help me to be a light and encouragement to others. That they will see you working in my life and will know that you can do it for them also! In the precious name of our Lord and Savior Jesus! AMEN!"

And the winner for the Jojo Jr is ...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 12:09:00 +0000

Angie Brady said:

Mommy of L and G said...
Voted 4- dangiebrady at gmail dot com

October 8, 2010 10:37 AM

Congrats Angie! Winner has already been confirmed!

Thank you all who participated and voted for Briella! Unfortunately she did not win the photo contest, but it was still fun all joining together for one cause! Thanks for your support!

Guest Blogger ... My Children By Faith

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 12:47:00 +0000

As long as I can remember, I've wanted to be a mother. I'm not quite sure what drove that so strongly within me, but I felt like it was what I was created to do. After we were married about a year, our friends started having kids and I started getting the itch. I was so eager to become a mother and I wanted to be a young mom. But, I was almost certain I would have a problem with any potential pregnancy. Part of it was my own mother's history; she had 2 to 3 miscarriages before having me, my sister, and my half brother. I also had never had any major gynelogical issues up to this point in time. I was told by my OB/GYN that these things aren't always hereditary, so they gave me hope, but yet I had dread. I was told to try naturally for a year, and if we didn't conceive, to come back and we would go to a fertility clinic.

Baby Boy!

That year came and went. My husband kept telling me he wasn't ready for kids, but knew how badly I wanted them and was going along with the whole thing. I scoured the internet for fertility clinics in my area that accepted my insurance. I found one that had great reviews, high success rates, and was actually the closest to my house. I scheduled the appointment, but had to wait 2 months for the consultation. I felt comfortable with the clinic, but still unsure of what we were about to embark on. After the initial examination and tests, it was discovered that there was nothing structurally wrong with me (no blockages, tumors, or anything like that). My husband underwent some testing and things were not ideal, but not terrible or bleak or anything that required treatment.

Baby Girl!

So we started trying to conceive with the help of the fertility clinic. After the first year of disappointment after disappointment, I started to get really depressed (the hormones from the treatments didn't help any either). Things were so bleak for me. My husband, who can normally make me laugh about anything, couldn't cheer me up. I felt like God was so far away. I wondered why He would instill this strong desire in my heart to become a mother, but block all my attempts. After I got sad, I got angry. I didn't want to go to church, I didn't want to worship. I felt like God turned His back on me, so I turned my back on Him. My depression created a rift in my marriage, which was already under a crazy amount of stress with this whole intefertility thing. Plus, we decided to keep our struggles to ourselves. We didn't want our families to know because we were afraid they would discourage us by saying we were too young (we were 26 at the time we resorted to fertility treatments).

Baby Boy!

Finally something snapped me out of it and I decided it was time to start opening up to our families and close friends about our journey. This started to help lift some of the burden of what we were going through and I started seeking some pastoral guidance. My pastor of counseling shared with me the story of Hannah, found in I Samuel 1. She had me focus on verse 20: “So in the course of time Hannah conceived and gave birth to a son.” In the course of time. I meditated on those words. I had to keep reminding myself that God had given me this promise and in His time, His promise would be fulfilled and I would be a mother. It wasn't easy to remember this and I still battled depression, but this verse was in the back of my mind all the time. Even month after month as I got my period and had to start all over again.

My husband and I made the decision to have IVF. We had done all the other treatments we could with no success. We had to wait 6 months before we could start the process because of insurance issues. The week after we had our initial consultation about IVF and what it would entail, we went to dinner at my sister-in-law's house. Before we had dessert, she announced she was pregnant. The look of horror on my face was hard to hide and I almost threw up choking back the tears. It wasn't fair! She had just been married 7 months earlier (I had been married for almost 5 years at this point). Why her and not me?! Oh, the feelings of anger, betrayal, and depression I had! I had to try and move on because in 2 weeks we would be starting our IVF journey.

Baby Girl!

On March 24, 2009, I went into the OR to have my eggs harvested. Ten eggs were retrieved that day. The embryologist called the next day to tell me that 7 of those eggs were mature enough to attempt fertilization. Five of the eggs actually fertilized. We were told I was on track for a 5 day transfer and I would be called for more follow up. On March 29, we returned to the clinic for transfer. I had to take Valium before the procedure and couldn't stop laughing from the medication. The embryologist came in and handed us a picture. Our two little embroys!!! These were the two little ones who survived till day 5. I got weepy and looked at my husband and said “I want them both!”. My thought was, if this is our only shot at pregnancy, this would be perfect. Plus, my husband is a twin and his biological father is a twin, so I was very excited about that.

Two weeks later, we got the call: I WAS PREGNANT! We laughed, cried, and hugged letting all the emotion that had built up over the past 3 & ½ years as we journeyed. A week after that, it was confirmed we were having twins. My pregnancy was extremely difficult and not at all what I expected it to be, but in the end, I ended up with a beautiful son and daughter. This month, they will turn 1. I can't believe we've made it. I can't believe how perfect God's timing has been! He knew my husband wasn't ready for kids. So He made me wait until my husband wanted it as badly as I did. He knew our insurance wouldn't cover the treatments. It turns out, in 2009 my husband's employer restructured their benefits so almost everything was covered. I wanted to have kids by the time I was 30. I delievered when I was 29 & ½. God knew...and that amazes me every time I look in my children's faces.

Thank you so much N for sharing your story with us!

GIVEAWAY ... Vote for Briella!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah Winson) — Fri, 08 Oct 2010 13:06:00 +0000

This Giveaway has ENDED!

Dustin's cousin's baby Briella is in a photo contest!

PLEASE help them out and vote for her in this photo contest!

#19

Voting is allowed once a day starting today and ending tuesday night.

And guess what I have decided to do a giveaway! YIPPIE!

You could win your very own Jojo jr rice bag buddy from Sarahsewta! (ME!)

Hi my name is Jojo Jr. I LOVE to cuddle and help all your boo boo's feel better. I help with all kinds of boo boo's like headaches, ear aches, tummy aches, bumps and bruises. I don't like sleeping alone, so please bring me to bed with you and we can help each other sleep! Let me HUG and KISS all your boo boo's away!

You can put me in the microwave for about 1 minute and I'll give you a big warm HUG!

You can put me in the freezer and I'll KISS all your boo boo's away.

Mandatory Entry:

Go HERE and vote for #19. Then come back and leave 5 comments that you voted! Remember to leave your email address in the first comment so I can contact you if you win! You MUST do the madatory entry for all other entries to count!

Extra Entries:

5 entries per day for voting for #19.

1 entry for posting on your FB page. Leave comment with your status update.

1 entry for following me on twitter and tweeting (1 per day). Leave comment with your twitter status. You can copy this:

"I want to #win a Jojo Jr boo boo rice bag buddy from @Sarahsewta! http://bit.ly/aT3gV0 #giveaway #contest #free "

1 entry for subscribing to by blog via rss feed. If you already follow just leave a comment.

1 entry for following my blog via friend connect

1 entry for following my FB page

1 entry per day for voting for me on the picket fence! (right hand column)

Good luck and thank you for helping me support this wonderful little girl!! I will draw a name on Wednesday morning!