Sometimes the hardest thing to do is ask. Ask for the introduction. Ask for the referral. Ask for the business.

It’s especially hard for some business people who are scared-to-death nervous about what the referral source will think. Do they think I’m desperate? Will they consider my request annoying? Will they respect me after I’ve asked?

Constant Contact has published a nifty little booklet posted in its Learning Center that attempts to demystify the art of the ask. Their premise is that most customers are really glad to help.

First, the booklet narrows down the types of referrals to three: traditional (Does anyone know anyone who can…); testimonials (on your website or in email marketing); and online recommendations and reviews (using LinkedIn, Yelp or Google+).

The booklet spells out how to ask in person. You’re speaking with a customer, and she tells you about pleased she is with your service. This is where the science comes in: it’s a perfect time to ask. No need to get specific names. “If you know of anyone who could benefit from this type of work, feel free to pass along my name.”

This is also a great time to ask for a testimonial. Do it gently, by trying to understand why they chose you and like you. Was there any hesitation about buying this product/service? What feature did you like the most? Would you recommend this product/service? If so, why?

There are also places you can ask online: in your email newsletter, on your website (through share buttons), online webinars, in your regular emails. To make it even more enticing, consider offering a referral program with incentives or a finder’s fee.

Then there’s the art of getting referrals without asking. The booklet says yes, you can. Find ways to make your customers say WOW. A “wow” gets people talking, and nothing, but nothing, takes the place of word-of-mouth marketing.

Here’s a final and most important fact about the ask: the more you ask, the more you’ll grow. Even if one or two Scrooges say no (and be sure to find out why), most people WILL say yes. Your business will grow exponentially.

Be brave. Go forth and ask. Then come back and share your success story here.

This blog was originally posted on the Proactive PR blog at TCWmag.com.

Social media makes it a lot easier for customer complaints to be heard. A single complaint can grow into a roar if it’s shared over and over on social media platforms.

A negative post on Yelp, an angry status update on Facebook, or an irate-sounding Tweet can seriously hurt your business if you don’t take action promptly. Believe it or not, you can diffuse anger and actually turn a complainer into a loyal customer by following these steps.

• First, listen carefully. Listen fully to the complainer (either online or by phone) without interrupting, and try to find common points of frustration. You may indicate you’ve been in a similar situation – an action by itself often diffuses a situation.
• Keep a positive attitude. When talking to the customer, try to view it as a learning opportunity and avoid a shouting match – as tempting as it may be. Research shows that a calm attitude can be contagious.
• Do apologize, but that’s not all. Tell the customer what you will do to rectify the situation. Customers usually want someone reprimanded, research shows. What you can do is promise to speak to relevant staff and take corrective action so the problem is avoided in the future. At that point, a customer may start to feel a real bond with you.
• Publicly comment back to the person if the complaint is on the Internet. Thank the person and say you’re sorry. Indicate the complaint is not representative of your brand. You may even want to offer a discount or coupon. If you don’t get a response, post another comment saying you are still concerned. The key is to stay public with your apology, so visitors will understand you’re trying to resolve the situation.
• Fix the problem if possible, and ask the customer to give you another chance. Then follow up personally later to make sure the customer got the discount or coupon.

If the customer was at fault, don’t blame him or her, or apologize either. Also, if you simply cannot remedy the problem, say so.  This is the best you can do, but you’ll try to find ways to avoid the problem in the future.

At first blush, a negative comment expressed publicly may seem like a nightmare, but by handling the situation with honesty, grace and calmness, you can actually increase your brand’s stature.

Photo credit: Melanie Hayes

If you’re a Mary Smith or John Jones, chances are your name will pop up on the first page. But with thousands of names like yours, is there a way to help ensure that people trying to find you – will find YOU?

Tracy Schmidt, social media strategist and corporate trainer at Crain Communications, faced that challenge when she was writing for Time magazine in 2006. She was doing a political story and had to call the GOP offices for comment. Because the spokeswoman’s name was also Tracy Schmidt, the office was confused by her interview request.

“As a journalist, I became concerned that when people searched for my name, they would find her search results,” Tracy explains. “I asked my editors to change my byline to Tracy Samantha Schmidt.”

When Twitter rolled out the following year, she made her Twitter handle “tracysamantha,” and she now uses her middle name everywhere, including on her business card.

Sean McGinnis, of 312 Digital, speaks and writes extensively about managing your personal online reputation. He suggests three ways to address the issue of common names in search results.

• Create a blog with your name in the website address. His preference is to use an entire website address, like http://seanmcginnis.me, but he says sub-domains on popular blogging platforms like Word Press and Blogger are good alternatives. He also recommends blogging at least once a week. “The blog that is used more frequently and generates the most shares and inbound links will usually win the battle,” he states.
• Create strong social media profiles and use them.Profiles on the major social networks like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and Google+ have a “disproportionate strength” and are “pretty likely to show up in the search results,” according to McGinnis.
• Consider changing your name.McGinnis doesn’t mean that literally. Instead, he says, you could brand your online presence with something slightly different than your name.

My digital PR pal, Joan Stewart, does this beautifully with her moniker, “the publicity hound.” Joshua Waldman, in his book Job Searching with Social Media for Dummies, suggests using a middle initial or a degree, professional license or certificate, to set yourself apart. “Those three-letter abbreviations after your name really do come in handy sometimes,” he writes.

Mana Ionescu, of Lightspan Digital, says take time to consider the “pen name” you want to use. Do you want your city or your profession associated with your name?

“Social network handles should all match and be aligned with the identity you choose,” she states. “Don’t rush into a @johnsmith12345 social media name. The name you choose will be your digital tattoo. It’s a commitment and will be hard to erase.”

She also advises to make sure the bio on social media sites lists the characteristics that define you and differentiate you from the other John Smiths.

A carefully-designed personal brand pays off over time. It certainly has for Tracy Samantha Schmidt. “Ironically, my name comes from Katharine Hepburn’s character in ‘The Philadelphia Story,’” she states, “but if you Google ‘Tracy Samantha,’ my name outranks her character’s name in search results.”

Do YOU have a common name, and if so, how have you distinguished yourself from the pack? What suggestions do you have that could help others do the same?

This blog was originally posted on the Proactive PR blog at TCWmag.com.

One of the more inspiring books I’ve read about creativity was published this year by a visual artist,

The thin red line between plagiarism and originality has always puzzled me, not just a writer but a visual artist. As a part-time student at the School of the Art Institute, I scribbled furiously when an instructor would look at my work and suggest I check out a certain artist. He/she never explained, to my satisfaction, exactly what I was supposed to be looking for and copy. Was it a part, or the whole? I was conscious of not wanting to plagiarize, yet I knew there was something to learn from great artists.

Kleon’s book demystifies the creative-theft process. Early on, he reminds us that nothing is original. Everything builds on what came before. It’s right there in the Bible: “There is nothing new under the sun.” (Ecclesiastes 1.9)

The first step, he writes, is to figure out what’s worth stealing, then selectively collect what you really love – from many sources: magazine articles, books, poems, blogs, drawings, paintings. Once you’ve identified an artist you love, study everything about that artist. Not just her style but what SHE loved. Research her work. Go deeper. Find out who inspired HER, then research everything you can about those people. Don’t just copy one person to be original – copy many.

Here was an enlightening moment: to be truly original, you don’t want to steal the style but the THINKING behind the style. Johnny Carson tried to be Jack Benny. David Letterman tried to be Johnny Carson.  Paul McCartney tried to be Buddy Holly, Little Richard and Elvis. On and on.

Once you think you know your heroine-artist, ask yourself where you fall short. Take your copies, and transform them into something that’s uniquely you. What is the next thing that Picasso or F. Scott Fitzgerald would have created? Go there. Record, google, doodle.

Kleon promotes a concept called “productive procrastination.” Have a lot of side projects going at once and bounce back and forth between them. Don’t throw anything away. Do good work and share it with folks. Wonder at something, and invite others to do the same.  Give secrets away, but don’t share everything.  

 If there’s one Kleon concept that caused me to pause, it’s his definition of plagiarism: it’s too simplistic. I’ve worked with a lot of lawyers and lawyer groups, so my innate red flag went up when I read: “Plagiarism is trying to pass someone else’s work off as your own. Copying is about reverse-engineering. It’s like a mechanic taking apart a car to see how it works.” Well, ok, but it’s more complicated than that. Talk to a lawyer if you think you may be crossing the line.

Salvador Dali once wrote: “Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.” Call it stealing, copying or whatever, but to create truly original work, you need to imitate, then build on what you borrow. Take only what inspires you, forget the rest, then transform your copies into something that’s uniquely your own.

Stealing like an artist is at once a complex and simple process. To quote Kleon: “There really are no rules.” So, as an artist, how have you benefited from copying your idols? What advice can you offer that may help others get to the other side?

This blog was originally posted at TCWmag.com in July 2012.

When I was 10

She calls it “When I Was Ten,” and it’s a suggestion to look back at the time when you were 10 and remember what you wanted to be when you grew up. Did you want to be a cowgirl, a nurse, a teacher or U.S. President? Whatever dreams you had then may not be directly relevant to your career path today, but some of the things you enjoyed can be a springboard to insights and ultimately, your next job.

When I was 10, I wanted to be a fiction writer. Inspired by all the Nancy Drew mysteries, my best friend Martha and I each started writing what became, for me, a 15,000-word novel – The Adventures of Pat and Peggy. Pat (the pretty, brave one) and Peggy (the chubby but sweet-natured scaredy-cat) were twins, and not unlike Ms. Drew and friends, Pat and Peggy attempted to solve a lot of mysteries in the small farming community where they lived.

 Martha and I enjoyed countless hours sitting happily on her front porch, writing our novels on thin-lined notebook paper tucked into three-ring binders. We occasionally stopped to read passages to each other, only to plunge in again with our hand-written reveries.

That love of writing became, for me, a love for journalism in college, and ultimately a passion for my profession – public relations.  2012 marks my 40^th year in PR, and I love it more than ever, thanks to all the challenges in a digital age where I’ve had to learn so many new functions.

I didn’t expect to still be at it. Truth be told, I suffered from career burn-out multiple times.  Also, I had another life-long passion which I hoped to turn into a career:  art.  A painter all my life, I can’t count all the art workshops and courses at the School of the Art Institute which I took, learned from and enjoyed.

Ten years ago, my career plan called for retiring from PR and traveling around the country in a trailer, exhibiting and hopefully selling my paintings at art fairs. That was plan A. Plan B called for retiring to a small town and selling my paintings online while volunteering to make the world a better place.

I doubt either of those things will happen anytime soon. I’m in love with PR – especially the writing side. Social media platforms and blogs have given me that gift. They have rekindled my passion for writing in the way I experienced it when I was 10.

 That’s my story, now tell me yours. What did you want to be when you were 10?

They either didn’t use social media at all, or they had a bright-and-shiny young person on staff to whom they paid $45,000 a year to manage their company’s Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn and You Tube accounts. The jury’s out on the ROI, although one business owner said she knew of a mid-sized, woman-owned company that had actually won a piece or two of business using social media.

Here’s the “$45,000 Question”: If you’re not a large consumer-oriented company or a high-profile celebrity, can social media really impact your bottom line? Is it really worth the time and financial investment?

Here is my best advice for (really small) businesses.

• Engage in social media without going overboard. If you’re a one or two-person business operating on a shoestring budget, you may not have the time but you still need a presence. Put those LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter badges on your website, but accept the fact that, at least for now, you’re not doing more than basic tweeting, posting and connecting.
• Put most of your marketing time and dollars into traditional marketing.  At the very least, that means getting your name in print. Depending on the nature of your business and your target market, you need to be featured in newspapers, magazines, blogs, television and radio. If you’re a b-to-b business, get quoted in trade publications, or offer to write bylined articles to demonstrate your expertise. Share the coverage through your social media channels and e-mail marketing.
• Embrace e-mail marketing. Every organization needs some type of e-mail marketing program.  It can be as simple as promotional fliers or a weekly e-newsletter to your target market.  Sharing what you have to offer on a regular basis can work magic.
• Be visible.  Get active in professional and civic organizations, and attend charity and community functions. Add all those new contacts to your database, and find ways to stay in touch. Be helpful to them, and they may return the favor.

Finally, stop thinking you have to do it all.  Do you know how many blogs were launched but are languishing due to neglect?  The same with Twitter accounts and Facebook fan pages.  Marketing is as important as it always was, but the rules have changed.  Venture forth, but know and accept your limitations.

Jean is the grandma of all weight-loss programs – Weight Watchers International. At 87, she’s still preaching the gospel of her unique brand of slow, steady weight loss. Jean was a New York homemaker in a size 44 dress when she decided to drop the pounds at a nearby weight-loss class. Would you want to walk through the doors of a building whose sign read “Obesity Clinic”? Jean didn’t either, so she created her own support group with a more palatable title: Weight Watchers. It was an overnight sensation.

I saw firsthand how it well it worked because I not only joined the program but publicized it. My first PR stint almost 40 years ago was for Weight Watchers of Chicago. Back then, it was a relatively new concept, and the media ate it up. I wrote case history after case history of men and women who had a double-digit and an occasional triple-digit weight loss.

The same marketing and PR principles that helped make Weight Watchers a household word still apply today. Here’s how you can make them work for you.

Differentiate yourself from competitors. An admitted compulsive eater, Jean knew from experience that “diets” don’t work, so she created “meal plans” that included breakfast, lots of fruits and vegetables – a little bit of everything from the different food groups but in moderation. The goal was to lose 1 or 2 pounds a week – and keep it off for life with a “maintenance plan.”

Offer something extra. Jean started the business in her home, charging $2 a week (the same price as a movie ticket) but soon realized that some participants needed extra support. She increased the number of weekly classes and told everyone they could come as often as they liked. It was a concept that stuck. Membership burgeoned – eventually into the millions. 

Tell your story. Jean had a great story to tell and she knew it. She did a ton of media interviews and wrote an autobiography, The Story of Weight Watchers. She encouraged those who reached their weight loss goals to share THEIR stories and hired them as her class instructors. In the business world, storytelling is one of the most effective ways to convince and convert.

Build your tribe. Back in the 60s and 70s, tribe-building relied on testimonials, publicity and advertising. Those tactics still work for Weight Watchers, but social media outlets like Facebook, Twitter and blogs make it even easier to engage and share. Jean also understood the power of word-of-mouth marketing, which is better targeted and more persuasive. If you can get people talking up your brand, it’ll drive traffic to your door. 

Create a persona. Jean went from an overweight brunette to a blonde bombshell. She understood that looking great was part of the persona that would enable her business to grow. Guess what? When Heinz bought her company, they hired her as their spokesperson. To this day, she’s revered by some, and was mobbed by well-wishers at a recent Weight Watchers convention. Lesson learned: create and build the right persona for your brand, and it can help take your business to the next level.

Think big. When Weight Watchers turned 10, Jean threw a party. But not just any party. Hers was held at Madison Square Garden, and it garnered a ton of press that helped propel her business to the next level. She listened to her advisors and started selling Weight Watcher franchises (like the one I worked for). And, she was never shy when it came to working the media. She realized the press could be her best ally, and they were. Ultimately, Weight Watchers International became a billion-dollar business with franchises in 24 countries.

Today, Jean Nidetch, at 87, is still slim though she needs a walker to get around. Twice divorced, she lives modestly in a retirement community apartment surrounded by photos of herself with celebrities. It was never about the money but the gratitude, she says.

There’s a lot you can learn from Jean’s experiences, both professionally and personally. Some of her strategies just may work for you.

Okay, maybe a couple.  One will be the July meeting  of the Public Relations Society of America (PRSA), my new go-to place for education. You don’t have to be a member to attend, and their programs are always good and useful. 

At the June luncheon meeting, a packed house heard some of the biggest names in Chicago’s social media stratosphere – Adam Keats (Weber Shandwick), Mike Pilarz (Burson-Marsteller), and Glenn Raines (Social Media Moves) – chew on the future of social media. They didn’t disappoint.

Here were my take-aways.

• Be clear about your own social media objectives. Is it awareness, engagement, or both? Historically, PR is about awareness, but the Internet and social media have changed that. More often than not, it’s both. But not always.
• The jury is out on the value of geographic platforms like Foursquare. Because I don’t have consumer clients, I wrote those off right away, and it seems I’m not the only one. The jury is out on location-based platforms, according to the speakers.
• Smaller, closer networks of people are the wave of the future. For my small brand, I’ve never understood the value of a gazillion followers on Twitter, most of whom I don’t know and never will. I don’t accept invitations to become a Facebook friend unless I know the person, and of course, LinkedIn requires you to know the person before “connecting.”
• Use caution when signing up for the so-called “flavor of the month.” This was a response to my question about Facebook’s brand-new feature called “Branch Out,” which seems to be taking off – and perhaps taking on LinkedIn.
• When you’re a popular brand like Apple, you don’t have to work very hard at  enthusiastic engagement. The rest of us have to produce blood, sweat and tears for every “like” we eek out, then hope it converts to a sale.

Another recent PRSA speaker, Gini Dietrich shared her own social media activity. On Twitter alone, she posts — get this – 200 tweets a day. Some of my PR friends say this is spamming, hands down, but I’m not so sure. She schedules one tweet an hour between 7 a.m. and 6 p.m. in advance and allocates the other 175 tweets to direct messages and retweets. And that’s just on Twitter. She’s on Facebook, Linked In, Google+, writes a daily blog, and services who knows how many clients with her staff of six.

Gini already recognizes that direct-contact and active “listening” are the way to go – IF  you’re looking to strengthen relationships and build business. She seems to be doing it all.  I admire her.

Building a Facebook fan base can be extremely time-consuming, but Facebook has made it easier with its new “Best Practices Guide.”

The 14-page guide does a good job of explaining not only how businesses can build a fan base but also how to use Facebook to reach specific business objectives.

 The guide opens with five “guiding principles”: build a strategy that is social by design, create an authentic brand voice, make it interactive, nurture your relationships, and keep learning.

Next comes common business objectives and ways to reach them.  These include building awareness, differentiating yourself from the competition, increasing traffic and sales, building loyalty, and gaining insights by observing customer’s actions and comments.

What I found really helpful are 14 actual case studies of some of the bigger brands and how they’ve used Facebook to reach a specific objective.  Here are three of them: 

• To build awareness of its new M&Ms Pretzel line, Mars created a Facebook app called the M&M’s Pretzel Vending Machine. By liking the page, some 40,000 fans were able to get a free sample delivered to them and, if they chose, two of their friends. Mars ended up distributing 120,000 samples within 48 hours.
• To increase traffic and sales, Levi’s launched its fall 2010 Workwear Collection with a 40 percent-off coupon offer that resulted in a two-fold increase to the Levi’s website within 15 minutes of it being posted on Facebook. Levi’s also used Facebook ads to drive traffic to its stores where customers received an in-store discount.
• To gain insights about its customers, VisitBritain used a Facebook ad campaign to raise brand awareness that would attract visitors to Great Britain. Every day, it posts something related to the UK for discussion. With a relatively small budget, Visit Britain has been able to write a post and know within a few minutes if it is resonating with people. Compare that to an expensive billboard campaign where it’s much harder to gauge a reaction.

What’s your Facebook success story? Send it to me via email (chris@chrisruys.com), and I’ll share it on my Facebook fan page, in a future blog post and in my e-newsletter PR NOW.

 Image by MoneyBlogNewz/Creative Commons

Guest Post 

By Jonathan Lehrer, for Chris Ruys 

 “Oh no, not another Mission Statement meeting!”

 How many times have we professionals heard such cries of anguish when faced with the prospect of updating their organization’s 10-year-old corporate mission to 21st-century language?

 Whether it’s a mission statement, a proposed Web site content tree or a plan outline, they all involve collaboration among a roomful of people.

 I’ve developed a process called “live drafting” that makes these sessions more bearable and maybe even productive.

 Through live drafting, cantankerous co-workers needing to collaborate can quickly consolidate comments on the same page.

Materials needed:

 1. Computer with any word-processing software.

2. Projector and screen (or Smartboard).

 3. Facilitator who’s a good listener and wordsmith as well as a quick typist (yes, I’m available!).

 Procedure:

 Set up the computer to display the word-processing window on the screen for all to see. Beginning with the initial draft is quicker than a blank screen.

 I find it easiest to facilitate the meeting and do the typing at the same type, but these jobs could be split between two people.

All eyes will be focused on the screen (as I said, everyone will be on the same page). As suggestions and comments are offered, edit the document. Remember, you’re an editor, not a court reporter. Rewrite while your colleagues talk. Participants either will say “oh, that’s a lot better than what I just said,” or, equally likely, “that’s not at all what I meant.” Your continued edits should be moving the group closer to consensus.

 (When the conversation gets off track, I’ll sometimes put a comment on the screen like “what time is lunch?” If I’m lucky, that gets a laugh and focus returns to the screen.)

 By the end of the session, you’ll have a new draft that immediately can be emailed to all participants.

You can make the entire process even more collaborative by using Google Docs and allowing computer-equipped participants in the room – or across the world – to make changes simultaneously. Try doing that with pen and paper!

Jonathan Lehrer is a Chicago-based professional communicator. He calls himself a “message therapist” and blogs at mrcommunicator.com.