Finally I find someone who looks sort of serious and is somewhere within driving range. I get a time and off I go.

Problem is, kinesiology and weirdness is like showers and mold. It is possible to have a mold-free shower, but the chances aren’t very high. Mold grows well in showers, and weirdness grows well in kinesiology (and in Christa’s metaphores, but that’s a different story).

To make a long story a little shorter, one of the things she did was place a individual size coffee creamer package on my stomach and wiggled my arm. What did that tell her? Evidently I’m allergic to milk – which the other kinesiologist, who also tested for allergies, didn’t say I was.

”You have a really bad allergy to milk!” she says. ”Luckily, I’m one of the few people who can cure you of that.” She wiggles my arm and counts out loud to 10. She then informs me she has just found out that I have this allergy because of something that happened when I was one year old. It could even be a little thing like I got told off and didn’t understand what I did wrong, and then that made me feel rejected and frustrated and sad and the whole lot, and thus I can’t drink milk (an obvious conclusion). ”Don’t you feel sad, frusterated and rejected?” she asks me. ”Um, no, not really…” ”When you look in the mirror, don’t you sometimes see a sad little girl looking back at you?” ”Well, that’s not usually what pops into my head when I look in the mirror, no…” So anyway she wiggled my feet (I was laying down) and said ”Christa is now one year old”. Then she sticks her hand on my forehead and says: ”Christa, don’t feel sad. Don’t feel rejected. Don’t feel frusterated.” Then she wiggles my feet again to take me back to the present.

Weirdness.

”Now,” says she, ”You don’t have a milk allergy but a milk intolerance, which is better.” Set to go, I guess. Then she put on some creepy music and rubbed my feet.

Summa summarum, this is what I should do, according to her:

• Don’t eat yoghurt, milk, cheese, etc for at least a year
• Avoid coffee (waaaah!)
• Go back to her at least a few times so she can do this again because it’s obviously just what I need

My policy is, ignore weirdness, take what helps and leave the rest, and don’t go on an explanation but on whether it works or not. It’s been a week now and I don’t notice any difference, so I think I’ll try to cut down on milk products and coffee, but see no reason to go back to her.

Don’t play the harmonica while chewing gum. Just don’t.

Tog bilden suddigt med flit – kanske ni förstår varför

Legibus et armis, as everyone knows, means legs and arms. Beats me why someone would write it on their house, though…

However, for the first time in a long time there was something I thought ”that I have to blog about!”

It was a dream I had. And the reason I thought it was important to write here, was that no one in real life actually cares about my dreams.

You do though, right? Right?

Oh well.

So I was dreaming I was going to Sweden to get my friend Amanda. I had to go on the bus to the boat, on the boat to Sweden, get her and then come back on the boat. Amanda was here this spring and we were in a complete rush every time we had to catch a boat/bus/train/whatever so she got really stressed. Now in my dream I could choose between two boats: the one would mean I had about 5 minutes to spare and the other would mean I had 12 hours and 5 minutes. Well, obviously 12 hours was waaaay too much time, as it would only take about an hour to get her. So, five minutes it was. Sorry, Amanda’s Nerves!

So off I go on the bus towards the boat, but accidentally get off about 10 km too early. How was I to get to the boat now? And remember, it’s not like I could take a later boat… I explained my predicament to a man who got off at the same stop as me and was getting into his parked car. Could he please drop me off at the boat terminal as it wasn’t too far from his house? No problem. But, he stopped at his house and got out. ”Go ahead to the boat terminal and just leave the car there” he shouted. I asked him again just to be sure because that sounded strange, but he couldn’t hear me asking and was already busy with other things, so I just left.

It seems I heard wrong. He hadn’t said ”Go ahead without me”, he said ”I’m just getting something, I’ll be right back”. Almost to the boat terminal, I heard sirens and realized the police were after me. ”I don’t have time to be arrested now, I’ll miss the boat!” I thought. I’ll explain to them after I get back.

That was about when I woke up. Anyway, if anyone’s been bothered to read this through, why don’t you write a comment with your dream? You know, an ear for an ear and all that lot (I bore your ear off and you bore mine).

I had a strange dream last night. Well, I guess dreams are strange and this is typical. Skip to the next paragraph if you have something better to do than read about my dreams. In the dream I dreamed I woke up and saw that it was really pretty outside, the sun was setting (an odd time to wake up, I know) and it was all red, and I knew that the colors would change and it would be normal within a few minutes. But, I had to go get my camera which was quite far away, and then I had to switch shoes so I could go outside, and then for some reason I had to park the car, backwards, up this really steep driveway, like 45 degrees. The car didn’t want to park because it was so steep, and when I finally thought it would stay put I got out, and it started rolling down really fast – then I realized it wasn’t in park, but in drive and now it was going to go a really long ways and I had to run after it. Before I had caught up to it it had run over an old lady’s foot – she just happened to walk by then. Luckily, she said it didn’t hurt. I thought that was strange, but it all made sense when I looked back at the car and saw it was just Benji, who was running in circles around being completely goofy. So, now I had to catch him before I took my pictures. By the time I caught him it looked really ugly outside so I decided to go for a walk with him instead, as he obviously had way too much energy.

Can anyone psychoanalyze this for me please?

In other news: from the 6th of December to at least the 6th of January, I’m going to be really busy with doubtful internet connection, so no blogging. Just go home, people.