We're Adopting!

I know our announcement to adopt came as a big surprise to many of our friends and family. I promise that we were not trying to keep anything from anyone, and I hope we haven't hurt anyone's feelings by them finding out this news in a non-personalized way. It's something we prayed about for a long time, and once we felt the Lord telling us this was His plan for us, we just went for it! I thought ya'll might like some background info on our reason to adopt and such though, so I wanted to write an entry about that...

As most of you know, we often refer to L as our miracle-girl. We were TTC for a long time (well, OK, anytime you want to be pregnant and you aren't, it seems like a long time! lol) and then found out DH had cancer. We were told it was very likely we would not be able to get pregnant on our own...but God had different plans:) Just two months after DH's surgery, we found out we were expecting! I guess a big part of me thought that since we were able to get pregnant with her that once we were ready for another child we would be able to get pregnant again...but that just hasn't happened the way I thought it would.

After TTC for over a year, we began talking with my OB about possible problems. DH went through some testing and I had a laparoscopy done, and our dr was convinced we would be pregnant very quickly...but again, it just didn't happen the way we thought it would, or hoped it would. I always thought I would want to go through fertility treatments, but once I was faced with that possibility and prayed about it, I just did not feel a peace about it at all. I had no desire to go that route, yet I was desiring a child so badly...I didn't understand...until we started praying about adoption.

I think adopting a child had always been in the back of mind. "I'd love to adopt a baby one day...once our kids are older maybe..." but as I began praying through adoption and looking into it more, my whole thought process began to change on it. Without realizing it at first, my prayers had changed from "Lord, please let me get pregnant," to "Lord, please expand our family and bless us with a child." I also started thinking of how our daughter would pray each evening, "Lord, thank you for my baby brother and sister." She wasn't asking for God to give her a baby brother and sister--she was praying for them as if they already existed...and I began to wonder, does our baby already exist? Is our daughter or son (or both!) already growing inside of their birthmommy's belly? And as I sifted and prayed through these thoughts, I began to have this overwhelming desire to parent this child that I did not even know. I began to view our struggle to conceive again as a blessing--had we not struggled in this way, adoption would probably have just stayed in the back of our minds. But because of our struggle to conceive a child on our own, God was growing within us a desire to expand our family, and He was showing us that He had CALLED us to adopt.

I began researching agencies, but just did not feel a peace about any of them. I really wanted to find a well-established Christian agency that was near our area, but I couldn't find anything that matched up to what we wanted...until a good friend of ours "just happened" to mention Christian Homes in Abilene. I immediately got on their website (http://www.christianhomes.com) and felt an instant connection with this agency! She told us about Christian Homes at our Annual New Year's Eve party we have to celebrate DH being cancer free--this last year, we celebrated him being cancer-free for FIVE years...and then we came home and rang in the new year by filling out our pre-adoption application! What an exciting start to 2012!

The agency allowed us to get the necessary information in quickly and invited us to attend their winter orientation--there "just happened" to be one spot left for it! We attended this past weekend and it totally affirmed our decision to use this agency! The staff is just wonderful and full of Christ's love. I love the ministry that they provide to birthmothers, and I cannot wait to adopt through them!

To read more about this wonderful family and their adoption follow their blog at http://w4baby.blogspot.com/ If your interested in adoption and would like to know more, please call Christian Homes at 1.800.592.4725

Yet another year is coming to close and we approach the season of Thanksgiving and Christmas. I especially love this time of year as many do not because of the gifts, but the time we get to spend with family, friends and just kind of wind down the year.

Every year around this time Sheena and I try to contribute or donate to someone that is less fortunate and try to help them enjoy the season as we do. We donate money through out the year but during this time, we try to adopt a family and actually get them the items that they need/want. We also try to avoid big organizations that usually receive plenty throughout the year and focus on the not so large organizations.

Sheena did all the research and found this great organization (Christian Homes and Family Services). They have eight apartments that offer up to women with unplanned pregnancies free of charge. In addition to providing for a birth mother's physical needs, they also help them continue her education, provide counseling, and help her think through and plan for life after her baby is born. Most importantly, if she choose to place her baby for adoption, they will help her select a wonderful, Christian couple to be her baby's parents.

We chose to buy each of the eight occupants all the necessary items that were listed and basically made care packages. Usually these are all donated items, but we decided to buy them all brand new basics to get them started. It sounds pretty easy, but there were a few exhausting trips to Walmart and a lot of toting things back and forth.

The next feat was to get all these items to Abilene, TX which is where the organization is. Luckily, a board member from the organization lives in Katy and was more than willing to haul it out there. I was actually contemplating making the 6 hours drive out there, its the least we could do.

Here's a few of the items we bought:

Bible (Women's Devotional or Daily Devotional Bible)
Journal
Pens
Frying pan, small pot and cookie sheet
Cooking utensils such as a knife, spatula, wooden spoons
Plates, glasses and flatware for no more than four
Cup towels and dishcloths
Dish Drainer Sheets for a twin or double bed
Pillows Bedding sets
Bath, hand towels, and washcloths
Bath mat
Standard shower curtain
Shampoo, conditioner, bath and hand soap
Deodorant and body lotion
Disposable razors
Toothpaste and toothbrush
Mouthwash

It is so easy to cut a check to someone or hand some cash to a worthy cause, but when you have to spend some time to actually do something meaningful it is a little more WORK (I'm lazy if you didn't catch on). This was the biggest task we've taken on and it took me a little time to get ramped up on doing the work. Sheena on the other hand blows my mind on how energetic and enthusiastic she was through the process, it says a lot about her. After our second trip to Walmart and slowly seeing the accumulation of items that we were going to donate, I could only imagine how the person on the other end would feel. It was all worth it!

I've always wanted to help out the community and figured monetary contributions would suffice BUT it is definetly more rewarding getting knowing that you have personally made a difference. Since we have been doing this the past few years I hope I can continue to do this not just once a year but through out the year. We have so much and are blessed beyond belief and there are people that are in need 365 days out of the year. Lastly, Introducing the act of giving to my daughter can only help her be a role model in this world, and I think it was just a great bonding experience for the family. My favorite little helper!

Let us not be satisfied with just giving money. Money is not enough, money can be got, but they need your hearts to love them. So, spread your love everywhere you go.
Mother Teresa

Shaylee Honey

 
Amy Munoz

 
Melanie Wallace

Summer Adoption Orientation
Friday & Saturday, July 15th & 16th
Abilene, Texas

Summer Board of Trustees Meeting
Saturday, August 27th
Tyler, Texas

East Texas Foster Family Picnic
Saturday, August 27th
GABC Retreat Center - Lake Tyler - Tyler, Texas

Fall Adoption Orientation
Friday & Saturday, September 30th - October 1st
Abilene, Texas

7th Annual Red River Charity Golf Classic
Monday, October 3rd - 1 p.m. Shotgun
Paris Golf & Country Club - Paris, Texas
Contact Kathryn Bashaw at kbashaw@ChristianHomes.com or 817.428.1441

Erin Hanner knows she is blessed, not ditched.

Adoption is a topic some people choose to keep quiet about or become strangely awkward when it is mentioned. For Erin Hanner, adoption is what gave her life and a family that showers her with love, safety and a place to call home.

"My parents would always tell me that I was chosen but that they were stuck with my brothers," said Hanner. "That was their way of telling me I was adopted but it took a few years for me to really understand that."

When she finally understood the act of adoption, Hanner said she experienced feelings of shock. It took some close friends and long talks for her to realize that she was truly blessed and that adoption was not a shameful thing.

After the confusion subsided, Hanner said it didn't take long for her to embrace the truth and know that her family was her own; she belonged just as much as her brothers. Hanner said she was never treated differently, favored or belittled. Her family has instilled the same values with her as they did her brothers and in her mind, that's exactly how it should be. Now, if you were to ask her brothers if she was treated differently they may say she was spoiled, but to Hanner, that's just because she's the baby and rightfully so.

Now in college in Abilene, Hanner has interned with the local adoption and foster agency, Christian Homes & Family Services. Her family has always been involved with the organization so it was the perfect fit for Hanner to gain work experience. Her parents, Mark and Jana Hanner, served on the board of directors for Christian Homes for numerous years; Jana Hanner served as president in the past.

Christian Homes & Family Services has been in Abilene for more than 40 years serving young women who are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy as well as families who are looking to foster or adopt a child. The young women are provided housing, food, medical care and especially moral support and comfort in their time of struggle.

During her internship, Hanner helped plan numerous events and assisted in keeping the shows running smoothly. Although she did not expect to work directly with the couples who were considering adoption, she always found ways to be a part of their lives. Hanner looked forward most to events where she could spend time with these couples getting to know them; talking, laughing and even sometimes crying. Hanner would then take part in praying over the soon-to-be adoptive parents and their new journey of creating a family.

Although a lot of work experience was gained, including dealing with caterers and seating charts, Hanner said she most appreciated the community and family that were built in Christian Homes & Family Services.

"Birth mothers placing their baby up for adoption shouldn't be nervous. Christian Homes is going to take them in, love them and find their child a loving home with parents who will raise them in the way their birth mother wishes she could," Hanner said.

On Hanner's foot is a permanent reminder of the reality of her life. A tattoo reads, "There is no fear in love." When observers inquire about the phrase, Hanner shares with them how adopted children feel about adoption and their families. Often times, adopted children don't understand why their birth mom would give them up.

"We love our adoptive families but there is always that doubt," Hanner said.

Hanner may be the exception to the rule on this one. You will never find her shying away from the topic of adoption or keeping her adoption a secret. She wants to tell everyone how cool adoption is, how heroic it is and how at the end of the day, she is the blessed one.

A dad beams with pride and brags about his daughter's beautiful voice. This is the kind of joy Nancy Miller brought to many lives while fulfilling God's calling for her life. This woman was the first child Miller placed into an adoptive home.

Miller has served with Christian Homes & Family Services for 40 years. She is now retiring from her ministry of caring for women with unplanned pregnancies, placing children to be adopted into loving Christian homes, bringing encouragement to the people she worked with, and leading the organization as president for 32 years.

As a single woman, Miller was able to answer God's calling for her life and devote her entire time to the ministry of Christian Homes.

"I never questioned why God kept me single all these years," Miller said.

Since Miller doesn't have her own family to need her care, she has had the opportunity to dedicate her love and care to the staff and the clients of Christian Homes. In many ways, the staff has become her family.

"I couldn't have done it without the staff I've had," Miller said. "God blessed me with great people to work with. Many have been here for over 25 years and that gives clients a lot of confidence."

The staff is equally grateful.

"When I didn't think I could put one foot in front of the other, here came Nancy with a hug and a sweet smile," said Charlene Walker, former residential and maternity caseworker. "The warmth from her blessed me and wrapped me up. She was like a warm blanket."

God's calling and passion for kids allowed Miller to lead Christian Homes to have great success. The numbers say it all. During Miller's tenure, 2,180 birthmothers were given maternity care, 1,139 children were loved and cared for by committed foster parents, and 1,419 children were adopted by loving families.

One young man approached Miller at a dinner and thanked her for changing his life. He had been adopted from Christian Homes and is now serving in youth ministry. Another family adopted two boys and a little girl through Christian Homes, and they now have nine grandchildren. The first little girl that Miller helped place into a home is now 40 years old and is teaching at a junior college, making her dad proud. Stories such as these are what give Miller's work value.

"It is satisfying to see how those kids have been blessed by their adoptive families," Miller said, "and it is great seeing the birthmothers change their lives through our program. It's a huge decision, and it's a tough one to make. It's a maturing process for them; to see them grow up beautifully is pretty exciting."

Now Miller is entering a new season of her life as she retires from Christian Homes and Family Services. Miller said she wants to do some things she was unable to do while working full time. She is looking forward to visiting her family in College Station, Texas, and seeing her nieces and nephews play in their soccer games and perform in concerts. She also plans to travel to areas of the country she has not yet visited. She also admitted that she "wants to read a book without feeling guilty about it."

"Time flies, it doesn't feel like 40 years," Miller said. "It's been an awesome experience for me, a wonderful experience."

Miller's influence will not end with her retirement. She will continue to bring joy through her actions, through others she has influenced and through her story.