Chronicles of a Future Wife

{BLOG UPDATE}

2012-01-27T15:04:00.001-05:00

Hello everyone. Happy Friday :-) Here are some quick updates about COAFW

UPDATES
-I'm working on new content and a new layout

-If you #FF me on Twitter, you may have seen me mention the feature submissions that were waiting for me via my form provider. Since I had not set the notifications to be sent to my inbox, I wasn't aware that I was receiving them. It wasn't until I made a visit to my account that I saw the submissions. With that said, I remedied the inbox situation (submissions are now coming to my inbox) but saw that I received A LOT of submissions. Needless to say, I've been a busy bee working on that. That is the bulk of what I'm doing right now concerning the blog.

-I've been considering changing the name of the blog. It doesn't seem to fit where I am in my singleness right now. Before Chronicles of a Future Wife, the blog was called Single, with a Desire. The title fit where I was at the time as I was single, with a desire to be married. That still holds true but as I've done some thinking, soul searching and talking with God, I realize that Chronicles of a Future Wife may not adequately describe where I am right now. To that end, I am considering a new name for the blog.

-Most importantly, I want this blog to be all that I desire for it to be. I have a vision for it that I don't think I've quite tapped in to yet, so I will be working toward that. I look forward to returning with a great new blog.

And finally (last, but not least)...

-Thank you to everyone who is still supporting the blog. And welcome to new readers who have subscribed since I've been away. I really appreciate it.

Have a great weekend,

HAPPY NEW YEAR {2011 HIGHLIGHT VIDEO}

2012-01-02T17:16:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to wish you all a very Happy New Year. I would like to thank all of you for your support of Chronicles in 2011. It has been a true blessing. I would also like to thank everyone who contributed to Chronicles in 2011. Believe me when I say your stories have blessed me and those who read the blog. You are appreciated.

As for me, I'm still getting myself together and plan to return in the near future. Thank you again to everyone who has sent condolences, kind words, and who have prayed for me during the passing of my mother. They were all felt and have helped me get through this difficult time.

Again, Happy New Year to you all. May you walk into all that God has for you.

Blessings,
Audrey

2011 Highlight Video

*Better viewed in full screen*

COAFW 2011 Highlights from Audrey on Vimeo.

MY MOTHER'S PASSING

2011-12-05T09:13:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone. Just doing a quick post to let you know that my mom passed away. We had a beautiful service for her on Saturday. Thank you for your prayers and kind words before she passed on. They are appreciated. I still have plans to come back to Chronicles. Just giving myself some time to grieve. Again, thank you for your prayers. Please continue to lift me and my family up in prayer. It is appreciated.

Me and Mom, Easter 2008

{GUESS WHO'S GETTING MARRIED?} DONNIE & MICHELLE 11-5-11

2011-11-04T11:16:00.002-04:00

I had to take a moment from my break to congratulate Donnie and Michelle on their upcoming nuptials. The soon-to-be Smiths will be saying their vows tomorrow in what I'm sure will be a beautiful ceremony. Congratulations again Donnie and Michelle. May God bless you with an abundance of love and many happy years together.

Michelle is the first bride to be featured on COAFW and Donnie is the first groom to be featured. See Michelle's feature here and Donnie's here.

Soon-to-be Mr. and Mrs. Smith

And of course I've already asked to have their wedding featured :-)

TAKING A BREAK FROM THE BLOG

2011-10-17T10:46:00.001-04:00

Hello everyone. I just wanted to let you all know that I will be taking a break from the blog (Twitter and Chronicles FB page as well). My plates have been extra full these days and I need to pump the breaks. First and foremost, my mom is back home. After being in the hospital for over a year (after a lung transplant), she is finally home. She is doing well and is moving toward walking on her own. Needless to say, I want to soak up this time with her. Plus, I am her primary caregiver so I'm getting acclimated to taking care of her.

On a personal level, I need to steal away for a minute and make some me time. God always taps me on the shoulder to let me know when I need to step back and gather myself, and of course spend some time with Him. I know He has some great things to share with me so I'm being obedient and giving myself a break.

Also, I want to revamp Chronicles and come back with all the great ideas I have planned for the blog. One of the things I want to do is be more consistent with posting, etc... and to share more personal posts about me and what's going on in my everyday life (I've expressed the latter before, but not too much was going on with me). I'm sure I'll have plenty to share (God willing) when I return.

Thanks to everyone who has subscribed, shared Chronicles, commented, or has sent me encouraging words about Chronicles. I really appreciate it, especially knowing that it's helping those who read. One of the things I want to do while I'm away is reflect on the many times that I've heard people say that this blog is a ministry. The more I've thought about it, the more I realize that it's an awesome compliment but it also places things into perspective about what Chronicles is actually doing and I don't take that lightly.

I heard a host say on a (Blog Talk) radio show the other night, for singles to use the gift of singleness to help other singles at this time in their lives. She echoed what I'm doing in my personal life and what I want Chronicles to do. Hence, why I'll be reflecting on Chronicles being more than just a blog but a ministry.

More than likely I will be back by the end of the year (around Decemberish). In the meantime, I would love for you to share your thoughts, comments, etc... on how Chronicles could be better. Also, please send me the names of single people (women and men) who you'd like to recommend for the Featured Future Wives feature (including yourself). Also, send me couples who you'd like to recommend for wedding and engagement features (be sure to read the Chronicles Feature Policy).If you have any ideas for posts that you'd like to see, send those as well. Send all your thoughts, ideas, suggestions, etc... to coafw@yahoo.com.

Finally, I'm not leaving without sharing a few more posts with you. Remember the Whole Woman Blogshop? I said I'd be doing that series as well. So, look out for my take on the blogshop series. Coming soon.

Thank you again everyone. I appreciate your support.

Blessings,

WEDDING WEDNESDAY: JIN'S BEAUTIFUL BIG DAY

2011-10-12T11:14:00.001-04:00

I love that she called her wedding "My Big Fat Jamaican Wedding". I'm pretty sure that's what made me stop and take a look at Jin's wedding photos. I loved how she detailed her soon-to-be walk down the aisle and shared what really goes on behind the scenes for a bride. And then, there was the overall look of the day. From the beautiful berry colored theme, to the picturesque ceremony location, Jin planned a beautiful big day. Here is her story.

Jin's Beautiful Big Day

Wedding Date: Saturday November 14, 2009

Wedding Location: Plantation Preserve Golf Course & Club

How did your husband propose?

My mom is big on entertaining and throws parties for just about every occassion. In May of 2008, she was hosting a Mothers Day dinner with about 30 of us in attendence. After prayer, we were all still standing and were asked to each say something to our mothers. My husband was last, and after he said his speech to his mom, he said that he had one more thing say. He then proceeded to pull out the ring, drop to his knees and asked me to marry him. I was in such shock that I don't even know the exact words he used. I didn't hear or see anything - I just remember crying. Everyone was else was crying too - happy tears though :)

Did you begin planning right away or did you wait some time after your engagement?

I started brainstorming and collecting ideas right away but it took a few months for me to officially start planning. I'd decided that I wanted to go back to college around that time as well, so I had a lot of other things going on.

How did you choose your wedding location? Was it your first choice or did you look at other places?

If I remember correctly, I found my venue in my local Perfect Wedding Guide. I visited quite a few places, but when I went to Plantation Preserve I just knew that I had to have my wedding there. It was one of the first places that I visited but I didn't think that I was going to be able to make it happen so I continued looking around but I compared everywhere else to there. By the grace of God, I was able to have my wedding there and I couldn't have been happier - I loved it! I got my first choice!

Did you always have an outdoor wedding in mind?

I didn't always dream of an outdoor wedding, but once I started visiting venues I knew I was going to go that route. A lot of places had decor that wasn't my style. Most of them were too over the top or simply outdated - an outdoor ceremony just seemed so more serene and simple. Besides we were married inSouth Florida, so we had lush lawns and palm trees as backdrops - nature was the best decor.

What was your Plan B in the event that there was inclement weather?

Our venue didn't have an alternate indoor area for a ceremony, so we did reserve a ballroom at a nearby hotel. Although it was beautiful, I really didn't want to use it. However, it would be foolish for us not to secure an alternate space. Lucky for us, the weather on our big day was gorgeous!

I see that your bridesmaids were dressed in different styles. Did you have specific styles in mind for them or did you let them choose?

My bridesmaids ranged all the way from size 4 to around size 20, so I didn't think it would be fair to have them all in the same dress. I wanted each girl to be in a gown that complimented her body and personal style. At the time of the wedding, I'd had a few years of experience working in a bridal shop, so I had a good idea of who I wanted in each dress based on their body type. Fortunately, everyone agreed on the styles that they were given and were happy with the dress they wore.

You had a "dilemma" about whether or not you would wear your glasses down the aisle. What did you decide?

Looking back, I don't know why I made a big deal about my glasses because I don't think anyone cared besides me. Ultimately I chose to not wear them down the aisle or during my professional portraits, but I wore them throughout the duration of the reception.

Overall, how would you describe your wedding day and what advice would you give to someone who's making preparations for her Big Day?

Overall my wedding day was fun and a big party - just like I wanted. It was the best day of my life. I wish I could do it over and over again (with the same person of course, lol).

Advice I would give to a future bride is to not sweat the little stuff. A lot of the minor details that we stress over as brides no one else notices anyway. To be honest, the bride herself won't notice those small details on the big day because she's going to be pre-occupied with more important things. Also, make sure you have help during the wedding planning process, be it your bridesmaids or a family member. Although I planned the wedding with my mom, we did decide to get a Day of Coordinator to help us out with rehearsal and the day of - she was a tremendous help and allowed us to relax.

Most importantly, don't forget what The Big Day is really about - making a lifetime commitment in front of your friends, family and God to the one that you love. The wedding is only one day, but your ultimate goal should be to make your marriage last forever. What the decor looks like, whether you caterer is on time or not is not going to matter the next day - as a matter of fact, it won't have an effect on your marriage at all.

See more of Jin's beautiful big day here

Photo Credit: All professional photos by Captured Moments Photography;

non-professional pics provided by the bride

{COUPLES FEATURE} A NEW CHAPTER: LORENZO & AARIUS JONES

2011-10-11T12:48:00.000-04:00

When Lorenzo shared the news of his nuptials on Facebook, I was happy in general because I'm a sucker for love and I was happy for him personally as I've known Lorenzo for a long time (we went to the same high school) and it's always good to see people doing well. I met Aarius via Facebook after congratulating Lorenzo, when he first shared the news about his relationship, then his nuptials. Just meeting her via comments, I could tell that Aarius had a sweet spirit about her. There was something about the new Mr. and Mrs. Jones that I thought was worthy of sharing: they are a sweet, genuine, loving couple, starting a new chapter in their lives after years of knowing one another. Here is their story.

Meet Lorenzo and Aarius Jones.
(Married: August 17, 2011)

How did you meet?
[Aarius] Lorenzo and I met 12 years ago through mutual friends. Then we reconnected 4 years ago and the magic started from there!

Lorenzo: How did you know Aarius was the one for you?
How did I know Aarius was the one.....Well it wasn't her cooking lol. I knew from the first moment she was the one for me when I saw those cute dimples. We had dated a couple years back. I wasn't worthy of her love at that time. I was still a boy. I needed time to grow and be the man I'm suppose to be.So I dated but always finding myself reverting right back to Aarius.She was like no other woman I've dated.She paid attention to the small things.Wherever she could help she would and push me to the limit and held me accountable.She's a woman who doesn't settle for less.She's my favorite person to hang out with.We have so much fun together. Aarius is truly my sole mate.I could write a book and be here for hours telling you how I knew she was the one but to sum it up I couldn't have chosen a better person to share the benefits of life with.Being that she is beautiful is a bonus!!.My kids love her and I love her kids and vice versa.You rarely see that in most familys.So now this time around we put GOD first in everything we do.GOD is love and we love each other unconditionally.

Aarius: How did you know Lorenzo was the one for you?
For me to realize that Lorenzo was the one for me it took several years, a few tears, break-ups and trials before he showed me that there was no other man that I wanted to spend the rest or my life with. Lorenzo is one of the most positive, humble, loving and the list goes on..men that I have ever met. My husband has always been there for me and loved me for ME nothing else in between. When I would feel like I was ready to give up he would always be the strength for both of us to keep going. I could not have asked God for a better husband, father to our children or friend and for that I gave him my heart for eternity.

Lorenzo: You make a great point about needing time to grow and be the man you were supposed to be. How important is it for a man to understand when he's not ready to begin a relationship?
It's very very important for a man to understand when he's not ready to begin a relationship. Men hide their feelings very well. So we find it very easy to be with another woman right after we've broken up with another woman. Trying to fill that void(feelings). But for me it was hard because I'm the type of guy who has to have a woman. I don't like being alone. But I took time to myself and got closer to GOD which made me stronger as a man and showed me the things I was doing wrong. And how to treat a woman and not do or bring the bad habits into my new relationship. And most importantly you have to have a relationship with GOD and LOVE him to truly understand how to treat and love a woman.

Aarius: Did you have to change anything about yourself before making a commitment? If so, what are some of those things?
The one thing that I had to change about myself was my self proclaimed "independence" since I have been a single parent for quite some time I have always been used to doing things on my own without any help. While it's always great to be independent I had to learn to be humbly independent and face humility when necessary as well. At the end of the day a woman should always let her man be just that "the man" I had to learn when to stand up when he needs strength and also humbly take the passenger seat and let him drive too.

Both: You have both described this as a new chapter in your lives. What are some of the "old" things you will leave behind? What new things will you bring?
[Aarius] This is definitely a new chapter in our lives because we have the history and we have been through the good and the bad. I left behind my single, independent life and traded that for a family with a strong husband as our lead. I plan to always be my husbands best friend, lover, and backbone. I truly believe in the saying "you have to go through something to get to something" and I believe we have did that so from here on out the sky is the limit and we now let God guide our path solely!
[Lorenzo] Some of the old things I leave behind is some of my friends (men and women) Sometimes they can be a distraction from you seeing the bigger picture. My family is my top priority. No more stuntin (for now) lol...For the most part everybody knows I was a very flashy guy (on all the scenes) but now i'm a normal guy fitting in. The new things I will bring will be compromise and understanding(communication) without it it's a disaster waiting to happen ,fun..... you have to have it in a healthy relationship and my LOVE it will be shown daily through my daily activities of life.

Both: What advice would you give to a couple who may be going through what you went through, before you officially became a couple? It may be obvious to them that they should be together, but it just may not be the time. What would you say to them as they wait, until God says it's time?
[Lorenzo]What I would tell them is to let go even when its the hardest thing to do.If you truly love each other you'll wait on the each other so you can fully get what you deserve out of a relationship.Once you get a certain age it's all about putting GOD first and letting him lead you in the right direction.You have to have a high level of maturity and and your heart pure and open.For me dating until you find the one is like school prepping you for the real world.You learn the do's and the don'ts.With that being said my wife will always be the happiest woman alive !!! [Aarius] The best advice that I would give to a couple that may be in the same situation that Lo and I were in is to have faith and wait. Don't push it into happening if it is meant to be it will be everything takes time to grow. It is best to truly get to know your partner to be sure they are who you want. Marriage is a vow for a lifetime and they have to be willing to spend it with that individual. It's not always going to be easy but with patience and Gods help they will make it through. Don't rush it let it flow!

CHRONICLES GUEST BLOGGER: SARAH D. HENSON {GOD'S FORGIVENESS}

2011-10-10T09:55:00.000-04:00

The subject of forgiveness has been on my heart for a while now. Sometimes I feel as if the hardest things for us to do is to show forgiveness, forgive ourselves, and to fully accept God's forgiveness. Oftentimes we feel as if forgiving someone means that we are allowing them to get away with what they've done. In some cases, when we are the ones who needs forgiving, we feel unworthy or think that we are beyond being able to be forgiven. Today's guest blogger is here today to help shed some light on this subject. I knew that she would do it great justice, which is why I asked her to share, in her words, God's forgiveness. Today's guest blogger: Sarah D. Henson.

Sometimes the only way we are willing to give forgiveness is if someone has a consequence. I will forgive you but you have to . We have been taught since childhood that you cannot have one without the other. Our justice system, for example, you do the crime, you pay your “debt” to society but we all know your slate isn’t clean. Your future will permanently reflect the person you once were. Anyone who runs a background check on you will see, within minutes, exactly what you did that landed you in jail...and this is how we teach forgiveness... You can never outrun your past...you can try to move on but there will always be a stain on your character.

The truth is we can’t really comprehend forgiveness that doesn’t have any strings attached. In fact, it’s the dominant reason people fear moving on in a relationship after mistakes have been made....”I can forgive you but, I can’t forget.” Weigh that against a preacher telling us every Sunday that God can take our stained past and wipe it clean as snow and, you can see why one could find it hard to believe that God doesn’t just offer forgiveness but amnesia, as well.

I’m guilty of it myself, telling someone I forgive them but the moment I see a sign.... even a glimpse.... of something that reminds me of their betrayal I pull back... too afraid to move forward. As humans our first inclination is to protect ourselves from hurt. We look back over everything that led to the moment we experienced pain; we document it each warning that came before destruction so that we never have to experience it again. It’s impossible to understand God’s forgiveness when we apply our intellect. We trick ourselves into thinking that we somehow managed the impossible and hid our true identity from God. There’s no way God could see the mistakes I have made, the thoughts I harbored on the inside and still think that I am worthy of His forgiveness. Can my past be erased and I start fresh in Him? We’ve done things we never thought we would do ourselves...If I disappointed myself, I know I disappointed my God. Just because you can’t forgive yourself doesn’t mean God can’t forgive you.

Jesus told Peter, before the Rooster crows twice you’ll deny me three times. Peter never thought it was possible that he would betray God... That he would mess up so badly that it hurt someone he loved deeply. Sometimes we can mess up and surprise ourselves but it doesn’t surprise God. He knew Peter. If Jesus told Peter that he was going to deny Him, don’t you think He knows we’d fall too? God knew when and how your were going to mess up long before you did.

In 2 Timothy 2:13 “If we give up on Him, He does not give up for there’s no way he can be false to himself. “ God isn’t faithful to us because we are without sin, He’s faithful because of who He is... You can’t compare God’s grace to man’s... We as humans cannot separate our mind from our heart. Our hearts forgive but our mind doesn’t forget. In order to fully receive God’s forgiveness we have to quiet our mind and believe with our heart.

The same God who forgave Peter and received a knowing kiss from Judas... knows all your failures, all your struggles and disappointments... and yet His forgiveness is still available to you. He shed His blood on Calvary so forgiveness could always be available to you. You can’t use your mind to comprehend God, that’s what makes him God, use your heart instead.

We receive things from the world that we can’t explain all the time.... Sometimes we use things because they make our life easier, even if we can’t really explain it. I don’t know how my cellphone in Texas can call someone in Australia. I don’t know how a strip on the back of a card can pull money out of my account immediately... I can’t explain to you how an airplane that weighs more than I can even guess can float on air, but I use it anyway...

I refuse to swipe a card I can’t explain, use a cellphone that I can’t breakdown, fly a plane that defies gravity and not use God’s forgiveness that is more accessible to me than all of those things. I can’t explain why God decided to forgive me. I don’t know why, in spite of all evidence that He shouldn’t, He lends us grace but just because I can’t understand it doesn’t mean I’m not going to use it.

Find more inspiring words on Sarah's blog: Sarah D. Henson

ABOUT TODAY'S GUEST:

Sarah D. Henson

Sarah Henson is a take-charge businesswoman, writer, and media personality who expertly balances career, ministry and family. Sarah is an on-air television personality, periodically serving as a host of “The Potter’s Touch,” a daily inspirational television broadcast on Daystar Television Network, The Word Network, Inspiration Network and Trinity Broadcast Network.
Prior to joining the staff at The Potter’s House, Sarah worked with TDJ Enterprises, where she

A naturally gifted scholar, Sarah graduated high school in the top of her class at the age of sixteen, top ten percent in the nation, and attended Texas Christian University, where she studied journalism. Sarah is currently a professional writer and regularly pens a blog at sarahdhenson.com on love, life, family, and marriage. She aspires to write articles and books that chronicle the lives of young women who have overcome extreme challenges to reach their goals in life.

Family, love and marriage are all subjects that are near and dear to Sarah. Sarah is married to Robert Henson, a professional football player who is a linebacker in the NFL, they have two children. She is also the daughter of mega church pastor, bestselling author and film producer, Bishop T.D. Jakes and Mrs. Serita Jakes, author, media personality, and business executive.
When she is not pursuing her career endeavors, Sarah enjoys cooking, listening to music and spending quality time with her family.

COMING UP ON CHRONICLES: SARAH D. HENSON, THE JONESES, AND JIN

2011-10-07T11:22:00.000-04:00

Good Day everyone. Happy Friday and welcome to the end of another week. I hope Monday-Thursday were great days for you (if not, God was still there with you and you still made it through *smile* ) I had a pretty good week. I'm sticking to the much needed schedule I put myself on and am prioritizing things as I should. I'm looking forward to a great weekend.

A few of randoms before I share what's Coming Up on Chronicles...

-I have been sneezing my head off like crazy this week. Why? My dear old allergies and sinuses.
-I've been thinking A LOT about my future husband and where God has me in this season of my life.
-I had a wonderful time tweeting on Wednesday. I hadn't tweeted like that in a while. It was long over due.
-I'm thankful that God has placed some great couples in my life (even if it's via FB, Twitter, a blog) who are not only great people but they are honoring God in their relationships. A definite inspiration for me.

Now: What's Coming Up on Chronicles...

Monday- Chronicles will have a wonderful guest blogger who will share some inspiring words on the powerful gift of forgiveness. Chronicles welcomes Mrs. Sarah D. Henson.

Tuesday- Who doesn't like a good love story? The Couples Feature next week will be just that. Lorenzo and Aarius Jones share how they became one and the great new chapter in their lives.

Wednesday- Another beautiful wedding that I can't wait to share.

{GIVEAWAY} WIN A NNEKA SARAN HANDBAG OR GIFT CERTIFICATE

2011-10-03T11:43:00.001-04:00

To celebrate her one-year "stepping out in faith" anniversary, Nneka is doing a giveaway for this great occasion. Go to her site NOW to get all of the details: Nneka Saran

And yes, this is the same Nneka who was recently featured on Chronicles :-)

REDEDICATION GIVEAWAY: WE HAVE A WINNER....

2011-09-30T12:21:00.000-04:00

Congratulations to Shenina Brown for being the winner of the Rededication book giveaway. And thank you to everyone who entered the contest: Shenina, C.A. Hayes, Nikki, Angel Bernice, and @Uchelala. More great giveaways to come. Also, a special thanks to Armond Mosley, author of Rededication for offering this great book for the giveaway.

Congratulations again Shenina :-)

Happy Friday all :-) Have a great weekend.

[PHOTO FAB] INSPIRED SISTAHS ROCK!

2011-09-27T15:57:00.000-04:00

This photo put a HUGE smile on my face. It's life coach, Tangie Henry (center, with guitar) surrounded by "inspired sistahs" at the recent Pathway to Purpose retreat. The picture itself is so inspiring (I love to see positive images like this, especially among us) so I just had to post it. Congratulations Tangie on a very successful Pathway to Purpose retreat. God bless you and all of the inspired sistahs :-)

Check out Tangie's site at InspiredSistah.com

{GUESS WHO'S GETTING MARRIED?} JENNIFER & JEFF 9-24-11

2011-09-23T09:48:00.000-04:00

I just want to send a very special congratulations to Jennifer and Jeff on their upcoming wedding (I like how they call it their covenant ceremony). That's right, they get married tomorrow. Jennifer and Jeff: May God bless you now and for years to come. Have a fabulous wedding day.

If Jennifer's face looks familiar, it's because I featured her back in April for Featured Future Wife. She is the first COAFW bride to go down the aisle :-) *happy dance* I look forward to making more announcements like this :-) Congratulations again Jennifer & Jeff :-)

See Jennifer's feature here.

Soon-to-be Mr. and Mrs. Tyler

A GREAT GIVEAWAY: REDEDICATION BY ARMOND MOSLEY

2011-09-22T12:53:00.000-04:00

So we've been kickin' it with the Mosleys for the past two days. It's so fitting to include the book that shares, in full, Armond's journey and the love story of him and his wife, Nneka. With that said, Chronicles is doing another great giveaway :-) Below are the details.

GIVEAWAY DETAILS:
-Subscribe to Armond's tweets @iammosley and mine @the_future_wife
-Retweet this entire phrase: "I've entered the #Rededication giveaway by @iammosley. You should too!" Details here: http://chroniclesofafuturewife.blogspot.com/ Please RT
-Only one RT is necessary. Simply copy and paste the phrase to your timeline.
-Leave a comment on this blog saying that you want to enter the Rededication giveaway.

Note: To help keep track of entries, along with acknowledging that you want to be entered into the giveaway, please indicate your subscription to @iammosley and @the_future_wife and that you have retweeted the giveaway phrase.

Example:

I want to enter the Rededication giveaway

I'm subscribed to @iammosley and @the_future_wife

I retweeted the giveaway phrase

Each of the above will be considered as an entry

*A winner will be chosen next Thursday, September 29, 2011

BEST WISHES TO ALL PARTICIPANTS :-)

Want to know more about the author and Rededication?

Armond's bio here

Armond's feature here

WEDDING WEDNESDAY: NNEKA & ARMOND MOSLEY

2011-09-21T10:25:00.001-04:00

I mentioned before that when I saw Nneka's dress on her blog, I literally gasped. Then there was the bright and bold color, combined with an elegant accent, that she chose for the Big Day, topped off with personal touches since she is very creative --and was a very creative-- DIY (do-it-yourself) bride. Today, Nneka tells us about her special day and shares some great advice of why all of it is worth waiting for. Her groom, Armond also shares his sentiments about their Big Day.

Their love story is so inspiring, who wouldn't want to know how the rest of the story went?

Nneka & Armond Mosley

Wedding Date: October 17, 2009

Wedding Location: Petersburg, VA

What was your favorite part of your wedding day?

My favorite part of my wedding day was walking down the aisle, surrounded by all my family and friends, and seeing the man I have no doubt in my mind that the Lord made for me, waiting at the end for me!

Did you have a theme?

I did a damask theme and our colors were hot pink, black & white.

Did you do the traditional, "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue?"

No, I didn't do that

How long did you have to plan?

We had about 6 months.We got engaged in April 09 and got married in Oct 09

How much time did you spend dress shopping? How did you know when you found "the one"?

Dress shopping went nothing like I envisioned it would. I always assummed I would try on a zillion dresses and have all my friends with me. I ended up putting a deposit down on one of the first dresses I saw.... I liked it but didnt really love it...but I figured I was running short on time and people kept telling me I need to hurry up and get a dress.... so I rushed it. The same exact night after I put deposit down on first dress, my best friend sent me a link to a website. I saw a dress I loved so I went to visit the store shortly after and instantly knew that was my dress!!

Did you have a lot of help planning the wedding?

No, I planned the wedding myself and Armond helped out with some things.

You are really creative and used that creativity to make things for your wedding. What are some of the things that you DIY'd for your big day?

Wow, there were so many things I did myself I dont know if I even remember them all! I did our invitations, placecards, bouquets (with the help of a few friends), cardbox, table centerpieces, did my own hair, etc.

How did you come up with the idea of having an Inner Circle?

Armond and I both have soo many great family members and friends who we wanted to include in our big day but didn't want a thousand people standing in the front of the church so we came up with the Inner Circle idea to include them.

What was your thought when you first saw your husband waiting at the end of the aisle for you?

I felt so blessed and happy!

A lot of COAFW readers are waiting for the day when they say "I do". How would you encourage them to wait for the man God has chosen for them?

I would encourage them to trust in God's timing and plan. We often want things to happen when we want them to happen and when they dont, we can sometimes feel like God isn't listening to our prayers. But God's timing is never off and I would encourage anyone waiting on the man God has for them to never forget God knows the desires of their heart. He wont leave you hanging.

From the Groom

Can you share what your wedding day meant to you ?

Wedding day was huge! It was the culmination of a long journey. One that began disconnected with God and concluded with an understanding of His role in my life. That understanding is what allowed me to be in position to receive my wife. And so, that's what the day meant to me. A day that represented restoration that only He could provide.

What were you thinking of before going down the aisle?

Well, I was nervous...lol. Nervous because I couldn't believe that I was actually getting married. I always wanted to, but it had come up so quickly. I was thinking how just 2 and a half years ago, I questioned whether or not I would find a mate as a result of my choice of celibacy. Also, I found myself humbled b/c I didn't "really" think I deserved Nneka. She was a reminder of God's awesomeness and I was just thankful that He trusted me enough to have her as my wife.

What was your thought when you saw your wife for the first time?

First thought was "Wow!" In fact, the videographer mentioned after the wedding that he heard me actually say "wow"...lol. She was absolutely beautiful. I was geeked...lol. I couldn't stop smiling. I was so excited that she would, in a few minutes, be mine...all mine! (LOL!)

Can you reflect on what it meant to you to see how God orchestrated the day that you would say I do" to your wife?

He is so good to us. Even when we try to distance ourselves from Him, He never leaves or forsakes us. And how He orchestrated my wedding day was just an awesome thing. God deserves all the praise and I'll forever remember my wedding day as a gift from Him because we didn't do anything...anything to deserve it.

WORTH THE WAIT: ARMOND & NNEKA MOSLEY

2011-09-20T10:36:00.000-04:00

The perk of featuring couples who have yielded their relationships to Christ is that it, in turn, encourages me. It's not always easy "walking and waiting" but it's definitely worth it. Oftentimes, even as Christians, we think that being intimate (having sex) before marriage is ok and have disregarded the command that sex is reserved for marriage (1 Corinthians 6:18; 7:1-4). Today's couple gives us a great illustration of what it looks like to be obedient to God in remaining celibate until marriage, that it's very "doable" --not in our own strength but through Christ--, and it's worth the wait.

Meet Armond & Nneka Mosley.

Both: How important was it that you were friends before you were married?
[Armond] I believe it was very important because our friendship is what has been the foundation of our relationship. We're pretty simple people and so, we just really enjoy hanging out with one another. Whether it be watching our favorite TV shows together, going to a movie or just sitting and discussing our dreams, we find so much satisfaction in the fact that we can do these things so effortlessly. Often times when friendship is lacking, these simple activities can become a cumbersome task. [Nneka] Being good friends for years before ever getting romantically involved and ultimately married was a great thing for us! It allowed us to truly get to know one another and develop a close bond as friends before either of us even looked at each other as more than friends.

Nneka: As women, some of us aren't used to being in a relationship where there isn't an expectation from the man to want sex. How did Armond being celibate make a difference in your relationship?
Initially, I had a hard time with readjusting my mind set and what I was used to in relationships. Small things like not sleeping in the same bed together took some getting used to for me. But overall, I'm really thankful that Armond was so strong on his stand of being celibate because it gave me an excellent example to follow. And both people really have to be on board for it to work.

Armond: How did you adjust to showing your wife affection in a non sexual way before you were married?
Great question. Well, for one, I had to be more intentional about doing "acts of service" and giving "gifts." Nneka is big on both of them and I've never been good at giving either historically (still working on it too!). But, I had to make sure that I showed her by my actions that I loved her. Sometimes it would be something simple like washing her dishes, folding her clothes or cleaning her apartment. Other times it would be through a thoughtful sign of affection; flowers, gift card to favorite store and cooking for her. Aside from these things, I made sure that I used words to communicate how I felt about her. With sex/physical contact not being in play, I didn't have the luxury of pulling the old "girl, you know how I feel about you" line that us men are accustomed to using...lol.

Both: Some women think it's necessary or part of the relationship to give their body away before marriage. Armond, can you share, in your opinion, what that really signals to a man? Nneka, what would you say to a young lady who is giving her body away before marriage yet is still praying for the one?
[Armond]Well...let's just be honest. That old saying "why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free" is true. While men will make it appear that they aren't judging you because you gave it up, in the back of every man's mind they would prefer you put up a fight. So, even in the secular sense, its never cool to "give it up" early in relationship. We, men, we're built to WORK. So, ladies, at least make him work for it...if it comes easy, he'll never have the same level of respect for you. It's that simple. Now, that said, I'm a full proponent of waiting until marriage because to me, that is the right way to do it. Plus, it gives women the ultimate leverage. As the saying goes, "anything worth having is worth working for." And men want to feel like they are rewarded for their hard work and thus, if you give in too soon, you'll never get to see the level of hard work or effort that could have been. This usually plays out in his dragging out the time period before popping the question or getting lazy and no longer trying to woo you.

[Nneka]For most women, I think we often think sex is something we have to do to get & keep a man. While I know there are some women out there who may feel they are getting just as much out of it as the man, at the end of the day, I don't believe women are generally built that way. Most women are doing any and everything they can to show a man why we ultimately would make a great wife. Instead of placing our complete trust in God to send us a mate, we take matters into our own hands. Compound that with the old saying we here so often... "Well if you aren't doing it, there will always be someone who will." Its constant things like that which encourages premarital sex. But if you aren't doing it, and a man doesn't want to deal with you because of that fact alone...its a good chance he isn't the "one" anyway. I can only speak from personal experience and since I did engage in premarital sex myself, I can understand wanting to do the right thing but falling. So I would say to the young lady to place complete trust in God and His plan for her life. No matter how unrealistic it may seem that the Lord will actually bring you a man who is celibate...nothing is too BIG for God!!!

Both: What kind of support system did you have to help you in your walk?
[Armond] I had Nneka and two male friends who were really on board with the walk early on. They helped to hold me accountable each step of the way. They were key and because God was the basis of our friendship, they were not only able to hold me accountable, but they were also able to pour into me in those moments where I found myself discouraged. Additionally, they too had committed to the walk and I think that also served to be a key piece of our relationship and foundation for a support system. I had other friends too, but these three were really in the "trenches" with me and that was invaluable. Aside from "peers," I also had a few ministers who served as mentors as well. Like my friends, they poured into me too, but they also stretched my faith and challenged me to grow deeper in Christ. [Nneka] I had Armond and a few of my other friends. I am fortunate to have God fearing, Christian friends who were very supportive during that time.

Armond: Some reading this may think celibacy is "optional". Can you shed some light on the importance of knowing that this is something God asks us to do?
God had it right all along. Sex is to be reserved for a man and a woman under the confines of a marriage. Yes, sex is good...real good, but done outside of the proper context it has the potential to have devastating consequences. Can God still restore one whose fallen victim to the consequences of sexual sin? Absolutely, but we must understand that it was never His intent that we contract HIV/AIDS, STDs, become parents before we are even adults ourselves...these things are not part of God's intentionality for His children. They are the results of our disobedience to His will as it relates to sex. Within the faith community, we've kind of allowed sex to become trivialized and treat it as an "acceptable sin." As a result, celibacy becomes more of an option than a mandate/requirement and much of the conviction around it has been subconsciously diluted. But, we have to recognize that sex outside of marriage IS against God's will. As such, we can't be fooled by the Enemy and just push the "sins" that we enjoy into a closet with no intention of addressing. We have to face them head on and just like all other sins, seek God's help in deliverance. God wants the whole you, not just the parts you're comfortable giving to him. And it is in that regard, that He's asking each of us to submit ourselves as "living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to Him."

Nneka: What does the term "worth the wait" mean to you?
To me, the term worth the wait means a woman knows her value and recognizes that she doesn't have to feel the need to have sex with a man before marriage to keep him. She she is worth waiting for.

Both: Can you share some helpful scriptures that helped you to remain celibate?
These are a few of key verses that helped us in our journey:
• Romans 12:1-2
• 1 Corinthians 6:12-20
• Romans 8:5-8
• 2 Corinthians 5:16-21
• Galatians 5:13-26
• Colossians 3:1-5
• 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8

Check out Armond's site, Kingdom Workshops here and Nneka's blog, Nneka Saran here

[VIDEO FEATURE] "HOW TO LOVE" with JAHA HOWARD

2011-09-19T10:48:00.000-04:00

What a great way to start the week, talking about love. It's not too often that we hear what real love is: the Christ-like kind of love that we all need, and for some, are seeking. Most importantly though, is knowing how to express love. A lot of times we can reduce love to a feeling or an emotion when it's so much more than that. Today, Jaha Howard of Hiding In Christ shares with us, How to Love via a two-part video series. If you need an honest, candid look at what love is, then this is for you.

Check out Jaha's channel here.

COMING UP ON CHRONICLES: REAL LOVE & KICKING IT WITH THE MOSLEYS

2011-09-16T14:48:00.002-04:00

Hello all and Happy Friday. I hope you all had a great week. I have some good things coming up on the blog and look forward to sharing them with you. See what's coming up on Chronicles next week:

REAL LOVE

Monday

Photo Credit
It's always refreshing to get a Christ-like perspective on what love is. Oftentimes we need to be reminded that love is an action, unconditional, and a lot of times, not about us.
Be here on Monday as I share a two-part series by Mr. Jaha Howard titled, "How to Love."

KICKING IT WITH THE MOSLEYS

After reading Armond's book, Rededication and being inspired by Nneka's blog, Nneka Saran (I literally gasped when I saw her wedding dress) of course I had to get them both on Chronicles. We'll be kicking it with the Mosleys as they share their beautiful love story and gorgeous wedding. And if you've been any where near my Twitter, you've heard me brag about Rededication. So, it's only fitting that someone be blessed by this great book :-)

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday
(I feel like giving something away...) :-)

Have a fantastic weekend everyone.

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} DR. TAFFY TALKS MONEY MATTERS

2011-09-12T15:29:00.000-04:00

One of the things that I'm striving to do as a single person is to have a healthy financial status. That comes in the form of (in my case) self discipline: knowing when I can and can't afford something, differentiating between a want and a need, putting aside money for a rainy day or unforeseen circumstances, and tithing. Today's feature helped me to gain a better understanding of how to be more financial responsible. If you need help in this area, this is just for you.

Dr. Taffy Wagner, Financial Consultant

What is your definition of financial responsibility?
Financial responsibility is living within your means and not falling to the pressure of peers, media or even sales once going into the stores.

How do you encourage your clients to maintain a healthy financial status?
In order to maintain a healthy financial status they have to stay focused, set realistic goals and continuously monitor their accounts (bank, savings, investments and retirement). Sometimes when people are doing good, they want to step back and stop doing the monitoring and that is when something inevitably slips through the cracks. I encourage them to keep a track of the small achievements as well as the big ones.

What are some things we should prioritize to help maintain a healthy financial status?
First: Savings should be either number one or number two. Why? Because people often do not save money - some have not been taught how to save and others are so overwhelmed with life, they don't even know where to start.

Second: Be knowledgeable of exactly what all the income is that a person has coming in as well as what the expenses are. Then knowing what their debt is whether it is credit cards, student loans or even car loans. Tracking is key whether you utilize an online spreadsheet, accounting program or ledger. When you are tracking income and expenses it helps you determine where you can trim extraneous expenses.

Third: Plan your spending for large ticket items. That means put the cash away in an account or purchase at a place that offers a lay-away plan. There is nothing derogatory about layaway. Once you are done paying for the item(s) - you OWN them! People need to get in the habit of being owners instead of renters or buying on credit today with tomorrow's money from a job that is not promised to you.

How can financial irresponsibility now affect future endeavors, including marriage?
Financial irresponsibility hinders home ownership, parenting, furthering education and even automobile purchases. It sends a message that you are not credit worthy to lenders. That may not necessarily be true because sure enough life happens, however, there are times when people do not take responsibility for their lack of financial knowledge or behavior.

When it comes to marriage, let's be real - many people do not want to marry someone that is bringing a lot of debt into a marriage. Unfortunately some people have a bad financial history and they are looking for a spouse with bank to bail them out. Let me be clear – a husband is not a financial plan! Whatever your financial situation, it is your responsibility to develop a debt removal plan and/or credit clean up.

How important is tithing as it pertains to financial responsibility?
Tithing is an individual decision and is based on individual's faith. I would not say that the people reading this must do it or they shouldn't. What I will say is this, when it comes to tithing and financial responsibility - understand that 100% of all the money you make belongs to God. Don't just be a good steward of the 10% and the 90% be out of order. IF you are going to follow the BIBLE, then know that the BIBLE also says in Ecclesiastes 5:5 - It is better not to make a promise than to make one and not keep it.

When people buy on credit, they promised that store or credit card company that they were going to pay that bill! Do not get caught not paying your bills. That's not a testimony to GOD!

I am speaking from experience and was caught in the 10/90. Unfortunately many people get caught up in the 10/90 and not paying their bills and end up facing lights being cut off, foreclosure, cars being repossessed etc.

What advice would you give to someone who is trying to live beyond their means, and is struggling financially?
If it is your goal to struggle financially, a lack of money affecting your health and job performance and not be able to have a decent quality of life, then continue doing what you are doing. However, if you desire to be debt free, have a savings account, maybe one day purchase a home and much more then set your sights on the bigger picture. Stop caving in to the pressure of sales, peers and the JONESES! The Joneses are broke and you will not know it because you are not in their home at night when they are fighting about overspending and a lack of money to pay the bills. Sure people can always give the appearance of having it altogether and inside everything is crumbling. Focus on your own household and finances, so that your financial future is bright and not gloomy. Set yourself up for financial success and not strain.

Visiting Dr. Taffy on her site Money Talk Matters here

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} TODAY'S GUEST: DR. TAFFY WAGNER

2011-09-12T13:39:00.000-04:00

There's nothing like knowing you are in good financial standing. I don't mean how much money you have in the bank. I mean, knowing you aren't going broke trying to keep up with the Joneses, that you aren't making poor financial decisions for a momentary fix (i.e. buying those pair of shoes or new dress you can wait to purchase), or that you are being a faithful tither. Today's guest, Dr. Taffy Wagner speaks openly, honestly, and frankly about financial responsibility. She will help you to look at just how you're spending your money. But first, get to know Dr. Taffy. Her feature to follow.

Dr. Taffy Wagner is a Certified Educator in Personal Finances, Money and Marriage Advocate and an Ordained Minister. She is also the author of Bride and Groom Money Talk FAQ, Debt Dilemma and Homebuyer’s Helper (How to Have and Hold on to your House). Dr. Wagner has been interviewed by The Denver Business Journal, Bob Brinker Money Talk, AOL Black Voices, The Associated Press, US News and World Report, Called Magazine and Woman’s Day regarding handling money before and after saying “I Do”. She provides premarital and post-marital financial counseling. She conducts seminars for individuals, couples, single parents and small groups regarding personal finances, home ownership and women’s issues.

MY 9/11 WEEKEND AND WWB UPDATE

2011-09-12T11:49:00.001-04:00

Good Day all. I tried to get on last night to give an update but I was so tired, I couldn't. Yesterday was my parents' 44th anniversary, so my family went out to spend time with my mom (did I tell you that she's back at home, in a rehab facility? I'll have to give an update). It was also my nephew's birthday as well. Then, my dad and I went out to dinner which, afterward, rendered me useless lol. I came back home, took care of some stuff and chilled for the rest of the day. [Below is a picture of my folks and nephew :-) ]

Just wanted to let you know that today is the official wrap of the Whole Woman blogshop. The final feature for today is by Dr. Taffy Wagner, who will be sharing some very good tips and insight on money matters. Her "get to know" feature will follow this post, then her main feature will be posted.

Thank you to everyone who has followed the series. I really appreciate it. I hope you got something out of all the features that were posted. I will have updates on what's coming on Chronicles later. Have a super Monday.

WE REMEMBER

9/11 TEN-YEAR ANNIVERSARY ~TRIBUTE

I can't leave this post without paying my respects to those who lost their lives on a day that affected our entire country. I watched the movie, Flight 93, a documentary and features to commemorate the day. My heart ached as I watched the accounts that happened on that day. But, after 10 years, there is still hope, resilience, forgiveness and even a bright outlook in the hearts of many that were directly affected by that tragic day that says, "Let's move forward." I thought that was a great way to sum up how we all should approach that day. Never forgetting, but moving forward.

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} FIT AND FABULOUS: CHELSEA PICKENS

2011-09-09T18:56:00.000-04:00

Incorporating some type of activity in your every day life may not be as challenging as it sounds, especially when you like the activity that you're doing. Today's feature made me rethink that the idea of being active had to be a chore. It doesn't. Including activities in our lives that we like to do will compel us to want to do things that will help us live a healthier lifestyle. Take a few queues from today's guest, Chelsea Pickens, who maintains a healthy lifestyle doing the things that she likes.

You've maintained a pretty active lifestyle over the years. What motivated you to remain active?
I have always had a love for being active - whether it be playing sports or just going to the gym. Since I enjoyed being active while playing sports in high school and college, I decided to maintain that lifestyle as an adult.

What are some fitness activities that you do?
Recently, I developed a love for running. Ever since I completed my first 5k three years ago, my interest has grown from there. Since then, I've completed 3 races, and 1 sprint triathlon. My goal is to run a marathon by next year.

Do you have weight/fitness goals?
I always have a goal that I am trying to reach to keep challenging myself. I believe that if you don't set goals, you have no purpose.

How often do you workout?
I normally workout at least 3 to 4 times per week. Of course many times life gets in the way, and I may skip here and there, but it's nothing like starting back up again.

Do you workout alone or with a workout buddy?
I believe you have more motivation when you workout with a partner. It's always fun to have a friendly competition. My boyfriend and I always challenge each other.

If you miss a day, or a few days of activity, do you make up for it with extra workouts or do you remain on your same workout schedule?
That question is right on time because I just missed a week of working out due to travel. When this happens, I normally tweak my workouts by adding more repetitions or increase the weights I lift. I also try to curve my eating a little bit more so I won't feel as guilty. However, it's okay to cheat sometimes; just make sure it's in moderation.

Do you work out to music? If so, what are some songs on your work out playlist?
Working out to music is a must for me. On those days where I don't feel up to working out, a little Beyonce or Lil Wayne can always get me going. My latest favs right now are Beyonce's Run the World (Girls), Waka Flocka No Hands, and I gotta have my New Orleans music Do Whatcha Wanna by Rebirth Brass Band.

What are some health issues you think you've avoided because of your active lifestyle?
High blood pressure and arthritis runs in my family, so I think I've been able to avoid these by staying active, and watching what I eat.

What would you say to motivate someone to include some type of activity in her life?
I would ask that person where do they see themselves in 5 - 10 years. And whether it's having a family, or being promoted in a job, I would recommend using that to motivate you in staying healthy.

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} BE INSPIRED BY "THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING KENNA"

2011-09-09T16:33:00.000-04:00

Part of being whole is living a healthy lifestyle. Truthfully, sometimes that's easier said than done. But when your mind is made up, nothing can stop you from including healthy habits in your everyday life. That is part of the story for today's first guest. It seems like I saw her "shrink" right before my eyes (via photos on FB). Her weight loss story makes you want to push back from the table and get active. See the inspiring story of Kenna Williams.

What was your greatest motivation to lose weight?
Actually, I did not have any real motivation because in my eyes, I thought I was so sexy...so fine...so everything but I had a reality check in March 2010 and it set me in a direction I have never been before. I went to the doctor for a sinus infection except I made the grand mistake of going to Urgent Care and not my regular doctor. The doctor there saw me and he said he would treat me for my sinus infection but he told me the real reason I was there was because I was a "HOT MESS" and that I was killing myself with my weight. Well with me and my "attitude", I was ready to slap this doctor. I should mention that this was my first time ever meeting him. The doctor states that I was probably at risk for many diseases and he said he would do my blood work just to make sure. Sure he was....turns out I was pre-diabetic and that alone turned me into a new person wanting to be around this earth long to be a mother to children I haven't bore yet...wife to a husband I do not have yet, etc..

Had you tried any weight loss programs before?
I never tried any "programs" before. In previous years, I was interested in weight loss surgeries like lap band and the gastric bypass but decided I did not want to go under the knife no matter how minimally evasive the methods claim to be. I did however work out in the past but I had not changed my way of eating. I would go to water aerobics but drive to KFC when it was over and order a 10 piece of wings. All the sweat of working out, all to let it go down the drain for some measly, greasy-filled chicken wings.

How did you choose the weight loss program that worked for you?
I really did not choose a weight loss program. My doctor firmly insisted on me seeing his nutritionist which I did. I only saw her for one hour but in that one hour, I faced reality of what I was really doing to myself. The nutritionist asked me what I ate on a daily basis and listening to myself say sausage biscuit with fried potatoes, 3 slices of pizza, Big Macs and fries did not sound good. The nutritionist recommended that I eat 2500 calories, 225 carbs and 50 grams of fat a day and exercise 5 hours a week. On the nutritional level, I decided that I would slice those numbers and I decided to do 1200-1500 calories a day, 20-40 grams of fat and 140-180 carbs daily. This was severe as I was normally consuming approximately 4,000+ calories a day. I was the "Drive-Thru Diva" and I knew I had to quit that toxic behavior. The first month of doing this, I lost 14 pounds. That was enough to convince me that whatever I was doing was obviously working.

What workout/exercise regimen do you do?
In the beginning, I walked a lot. I actually started my lifestyle change right before going out of the country on a business trip that lasted about three weeks. Everyone knows it's hard to lose weight when you are traveling but I was dedicated to being consistent. After I returned to the United States, a coworker mentioned that I should try Zumba. I did Zumba for approximately one month and the Zumba instructor asked the class if we would like to try kickboxing....best decision ever. I left Zumba and began doing kickboxing. As I lost more weight, I started doing 5K walks. I even started doing salsa dancing which is something I am passionate about these days. As of two weeks ago, I have enrolled in a Toning Up Boot Camp which I am hoping to give me some definition in my arms and legs.

Overall, how much weight did you lose?
At this point, I am at the 114 pound lost. I started this journey in April 2010 and have been fairly consistent. I have about 45 to 50 pounds to go and I will move into the maintenance mode.

What were some of the obstacles/challenges you faced during your weight loss journey? What helped you to stay motivated?
Some obstacles I faced was I personally decided to give up certain foods so I could concentrate on losing weight. I was a person who would drink margaritas a few times a week. Plus, I loved cake (what fat kid doesn't?) and would have to have a slice daily thanks to a nice bakery near my house that would cut slices that you can buy individually. I had to use mind over matter and tell myself that I am stronger than cheese, pizza, fried chicken, etc...During this time, I gained a boyfriend and many people end up gaining weight as they are dating. I told my boyfriend that I will go out to dinner but I will not be gaining any weight. What helped me stay motivated was I know I could do this and I wanted to prove to myself and others that this could be done naturally without the aid of surgery, pills, injections, etc.

Exercise and healthy eating go hand in hand. What foods are a part of your diet? What foods aren't a part of your diet?
Great question by the way. In the beginning of my journey, I used to say if it says creamy, savory, delicious, awesome, amazing and other awesome sounding adjectives...that meant it was something I should not eat. Foods that are a part of my lifestyle change (note I never say diet) include fresh vegetables, fresh fruits, lean meats like chicken (skinless), turkey and seafood. I also eat vegan bran muffins daily for the fiber benefit. I learned to enjoy brown rice and multi-grain/whole wheat/whole grain breads. Despite popular belief, I do eat carbs but the good kind. I do enjoy eating black beans and occassionally enjoy my turkey chili with black beans and pinto beans. For food that I don't eat or hardly eat...candy, potato chips, cakes, cookies, ice cream. I also rarely eat fried foods perhaps once a month. I stopped going to buffets. I don't eat samples in grocery stores and stores like Sam's Club or Costco. I haven't had a hot dog or a Snicker's candy bar in over a year. People that know me well know I started a Facebook Group to get people off mayonaise and ranch, two condiments that have a considerable amount of fat in a serving. There are other things I don't eat such as steak because I never liked it and I rarely eat hamburgers...maybe once every two months if that.

Was prayer a part of your weight loss journey? If so, how did it help?
I would say I would always huff and puff (as if I was talking to God) during my exercising! I would say things like God help me do this, help me get it together. I would not necessarily pray in the traditional sense but in the sense that when I am about to go somewhere to eat with others or I get ready to exercise, I'd ask God for help just outloud. I still consider that praying and I will say it does help because it allows you to focus on your goals in a calm way.

What was the most important thing you learned from your journey?
One thing I learned that in the past, I was truly never ready to change my life. Many people come to me and say they are ready for true change and when I tell them what I have done, then they turn their nose up and say no thanks. I've learned that only you know when you are ready and it took me to get into my 30s to actually see this. I've also learned that I am not big boned (as we like to say)....turns out, my bones are the right size...lol...I just had a lot of meat around them in the past!

What encouragement would you give to someone who wants to begin a weight loss program but doesn't know how?
I would encourage someone who wants lose weight to look at weight loss and exercise as a new lifestyle for them. They need to know that there are many changes that will need to be made and the biggest issue will be their own body resisting the change. The first two weeks are the hardest...if you are used to eating KFC, Big Macs and burritos all the time, the body will resist salads, lean meats, fresh produce, no pizza, etc....temptation (of food) is the devil I tell you but the battle can be won. As far as exercise, start with something easy like walking and build up to Zumba, running, kickboxing, dancing, turbo and other things. Many times people just head first into an exercise program and not realize, some courses of action need to be moved into slowly like BOOT CAMP!

More pics from Kenna's amazing weight loss journey

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} TODAY'S GUESTS: KENNA AND CHELSEA

2011-09-09T13:42:00.000-04:00

How can we be whole without being healthy? Admittedly so, I could stand to change my lifestyle as it pertains to my health. It doesn't hurt to see those that are actually taking care of their bodies to give a little extra motivation. This is true for today's guests. I was amazed at the weight loss journey of Kenna Williams (who I call "The Incredible Shrinking Kenna). And Chelsea, my childhood friend, has always kept a healthy lifestyle. Seeing these two sharing their healthy living on FB, only encourages me even more to want to do the same. They will encourage you to do the same as well. But first, meet Kenna and Chelsea. Their features to follow.

Originally from Memphis, TN but have been living in Oxnard, CA for almost 11 years. I'm an aerospace engineer by degree but I work as a Test Manager which is basically a project manager for the US NAVY where we test out various new technologies (weapons primarily) on a massive sea based testing range. I'm divorced but seriously dating someone! I'm a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc.

In my spare time, I enjoy traveling and I'm headed to the Bahamas next week and to Nigeria in the coming months. I also do a lot of volunteer work with my sorority whether that is tutoring children in reading or assisting in food/clothing drives for the local women and children shelter. I also enjoy salsa dancing...I mean REALLY ENJOY IT!

Since this is health related, I should probably mention one of my favorite healthy meals:
grilled skinless chicken with steamed veggies and bbq black beans (sure they have carbs but if you balance it right, it's ok!)

My name is Chelsea Pickens, and I'm a current resident of the DC metropolitan area. In my spare time, I love to shop, spend time with family and friends, and working out. During the week, I work as an Information Technology Consultant for the federal government, but on the weekends, you can catch me at a concert, museum, or local wine festival. Although basketball is my favorite sport, you're more than likely to catch me at a football game sporting blue & gold for Southern University Jaguars, or black & gold for the New Orleans Saints. I also find time to stay active within the community through my sorority, Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc.

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} ROCKING HER STANCE: YVONNE ORJI

2011-09-08T17:03:00.000-04:00

I'm always excited whenever I see someone proudly sharing the things of God, particularly when it goes against the world's "norm". Today's guest is one of those people. Yvonne Orji proudly shares her stance of waiting until marriage to have sex. Not only that, she boldly proclaims it (and allows others too, as well) through her t-shirt company, Rock Your Stance! If you need a straight up, unashamed view on living a lifestyle of purity and how to rock it boldly, then this feature is just for you.

P.S. I proudly proclaim that I've been celibate since 2003 and I'll "fashionably" be saying so with a Rock Your Stance! tee, before and after I'm married :-)

[Be sure to read some helpful tips from Yvonne on how to wait, at the end of the feature]

What inspired you to create Rock Your Stance!?
Rock Your Stance! Started with the production of my first T-shirt Slogan, “Keepin’ It Locked ‘Til I Get That Rock!” Since then, I’ve branched out to include messages for married women (Kept It Locked ‘Til I got That Rock!) and this fall, I’ll unveil a new slogan for people who believe God has BIG PLANS for their lives!!! The inspiration behind Rock Your Stance! was simple. Having confidence in reppin’ the Kingdom of God wherever, whenever! It’s about making bold statements unabashedly. When you Rock Your Stance! whether it be about sexual purity or about what you’re sure you’re entitled to as a King’s Kid, you add your own unique flava and style to it. You make no apologies for what you believe. You Just ROCK IT! Because let’s face it, there are so many people ROCKING HARD messages that don’t necessarily glorify God, and yet we still have closet Christians who try to hide their stance in order to blend in. But as Christians we were never meant to blend, but rather set the standard and raise the bar.

What does "Keepin' It Locked Til I Get That Rock" mean?
The phrase essentially is declaring a woman’s decision to wait until marriage to engage in sexual activity.

What would you say to a single woman who may be ashamed of her virginal or celibate status and may not want to "rock" it to the world?
I would say, Why Not? When you graduate from Medical School, you don’t keep the title M.D. off your resume. Quite the contrary! In fact, out of respect for your years of hard work, people actually begin addressing you as Doctor So and So. You wouldn’t say, “’No, Please. I don’t want to announce to the world what I am or what I do…” My pastor always says, if you are the only Jesus people will ever see, is God in trouble?! You may be the only person portraying a lifestyle of singleness mixed with holiness, and exuding an aura of happiness, that some will ever see. Why deprive them of an incredible opportunity to expose them to awesome possibilities?! When I perform as a stand-up comic, I make mention for my virgin status, sometimes in non-Christian atmospheres. On one occasion, a comic friend of mine told me that I should consider scrapping that bit of information from my act. I was offended for half a second, and had to make a decision if I was going to shy away from a big part of who I am and my ministry. Well, I decided to keep the bit in my set and I had a mother come up to me afterwards thanking me for being so open to discuss such matters from the platform I was given. Later, I had a young lady send me a message on FB asking how I could be so bold about such a stance. She explained how she too was waiting until marriage, but never had been vocal about it. I sent her to the Rock Your Stance Website and also pointed her towards my mentor, Dr. Lindsay Marsh Warren’s Worth The Wait Revolution Movement, to let her know that there was nothing to be ashamed of, and to reassure her, that she was not alone!

What scriptural reference can you share to help someone who is saving themselves until marriage?
I think it’s important to remember that this is just a season in one’s life, NOT a life sentence. God desires for us to have the best, live in the best, drive the best, work with the best, and yes, sleep with the best. He said that he comes that we may have life, and life more abundantly. So understanding that if we honor God in this area, He promises to bless our obedience. A big part of this walk is TRUSTING that God is a God of his WORD, and if he said it, he will make it good. Trust that if you wait, He will make it worth your while. He will bring you that mate that you can grow old in love and joy with. So if there is a scripture to help in your wait it will be: Proverbs 3:5-6. Trust in the Lord…and He will make your paths straight.

Yvonne shares some helpful tips on how to wait:
-I would recommend purchasing the book: The Best Sex Of My Life, A Guide to Purity, By Dr. Lindsay Marsh. They can find out more information about her and her movement on www.iamworththewait.com

-I also set boundaries and have lots of accountability. My friends know when I go out with a gentleman, and there are some limits set, if it is be home by a certain time, or go on double dates so we're not alone all the time. It's best to avoid "set up" situations like, "Oh my back hurts, can you give me a massage..." SET UP!!
Like I may have stated earlier, something my pastor taught me is that a lot of folks get full off the appetizer (four play, etc) and don't need the main course. Well, sex was never intended to be like that. God desires for us to have pleasure and enjoy our mates (check out songs of Solomon!) So for me, When I start, I DON'T WANT TO STOP!! If I start kissing, then it's gonna escalate to somebody's shirt coming off, then the pants, then....we have a problem...SET UP! So to avoid this, and I know it may seem radical, but, I have refrained from kissing as well until the preacher says, "You May NOW kiss the bride."

-Is it easy, not at all, but it's a day to day decision. If you are serious about not wanting to get burned, you keep the matches at bey. The same principle applies here. And I tell the guys I date...I'm doing this for YOU! Because we'll start kissing, and it'll get hot and heavy and you'll get an erection, and I can't do nothing about that for you, and then you're going home with (graphic alert) blue balls...and that's no good for anybody involved...

-Not wanting to have sex comes down to a making non-negotiable decision everytime you are with your significant other. You are worth the wait, and if he doesn't think so, then he ain't the one. I tell people ALL the time. This walk may not be for every man. But I don't need every man. I just need ONE GOOD ONE! and he's out there!

[From The Future Wife] P.S. The ladies aren't the only ones rocking their stance

Visit the Rock Your Stance site here