MOVIE

DIRECTOR – Roger Corman

WRITER – Jack Nicholson (yes, the actor)

SIX DEGREES OF CAST & CREW

- Actress Randee Lynn Jensen has an uncredited “Extra” bit part here, much like she does in 1978′s “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes!” Also found in that flick is the wonderfully named Eric Christmas, who did an episode of the much titularly-quoted-by-MST3K, “McCloud” TV series. Who else did a few episodes? “The Trip” actress Susan Strasberg!

- Sticking with uncredited actors, Joyce Mandel, playing a go-go dancer, did an episode of “Night Court”. Someone else who did a handful of episodes of that was John “Gomez Addams” Astin (father of Sean “Samwise Gamgee” Astin). John Astin briefly starred in his own sitcom, “I’m Dickens, He’s Fester”, alongside Marty Ingels, who was the voice of Pac-Man in the old cartoon series of the same name. It was in the show that there was a character named Super-Pac, who was voiced by legendary voice actor (and legendarily named) Lorenzo Music. This isn’t circling back to “The Trip” at all, as I’m satisfied with just pointing out that Lorenzo Music was the voice of Garfield, and Peter Venkmen in “The Real Ghostbusters”. I am pleased.

- One more uncredited bit-parter is one of the musicians in the house band scene on-and-off through the film, visibly playing one song while the soundtrack plays the other. The extra: the late great Gram Parsons (The Byrds, The Flying Burrito Brothers, etc). Gram contributed his song “Wheels” to the film “Plains Trains and Automobiles”, which featured a cameo by a young Kevin Bacon, aka the inspiration for “Six degrees of Kevin Bacon”!

REVIEW

So yeah, last Sunday I had intended to take in a sort of Roger Corman double-bill at the local indie cinema. For the past week they’d been running the new documentary on the king of b-cinema, Corman, entitled “Corman’s World”,  something I’d been excited to both see and review for this mighty website. Needless to say, something went astray in my understanding of screentimes, and as I hurriedly arrived mere minutes late for what I thought was the correct opening time for “Corman’s World”, to my chagrin I was faced with the deflating truth: the film had started over an hour previous to my arrival. Winded from the brief six-block jog to the theatre, I can’t say I relished the notion of simply going home empty-handed. Er, empty…cinephile’d? I dunno. You get the idea. It was a double-bill, with “The Trip” yet to start, so I decided not to waste my own trip, and salvage my ill-timed evening.

1967′s “The Trip” was indeed directed by Roger Corman, closing in on the tail-end of his full-time directorial efforts. It was also in the midst of legendary actor Jack Nicholson’s brief cinematic writing stint of the 1960′s, as well as one of a handful of films Corman and Nicholson worked together with. The key difference here is that Nicholson is not acting in “The Trip”. However, faces familiar to fans of 1969′s “Easy Rider” will get a kick out of the youthful vestiges of Dennis Hopper and, our lead actor for this movie, Peter Fonda. While an understandably easy myth is passed around that “The Trip” was somehow prototypical and precursory to “Easy Rider”, at least in terms of characters, the similarities seem to end with the sharing of actors and the themes of psychedelic drugs and counterculture. I have not watched “Easy Rider” in many years, so any further similarities are to be left to you, dear reader. And you are very dear.

If only Hopper had kept this outfit for "Apocalypse Now", it might have been better.

It is an odd, and perhaps fortunate, irony that I actually went into this film not knowing, apart from the core cast and crew, anything of its proper content, further than the aforementioned “Easy Rider prequel” hypothesis. The irony is that the very basic plot of the film lies in main character Paul, played by Fonda. A young television commercial director in the midst of an apparent divorce, Paul seeks respite in some friends. While Paul is a fairly respectable young citizen of the 60′s, he does have associates amidst the psychedelic “hippie” scene, if you will, sharing a commune-like house of laid-back environs. Dennis Hopper plays one of these free-lovers, in an interstitial capacity almost bookending the film. Paul makes his way upstairs to a decidedly less-kaleidoscopic flat, occupied by a lawyer-ish looking Bruce Dern, playing Paul’s friend John. While not clearly offered, it’s fairly apparent that John is one of medical capacity, if only medicinal. It is through John that Paul is able to embark upon his desired from his ennui: his first LSD trip.

One immediately possible criticism against the film is that all of this happens in less than ten minutes. That is to say, we’re given little time to understand or relate to Paul’s character, let alone any others. But what the rest of the movie proffers is perhaps appropriately prefaced by this minimal characterizing; this is, again, Paul’s first LSD experience, and as such the audience is then allowed to relate to Paul as an anybody, whom we can project ourselves upon. One might suspect that the core drawing power of this film is the notion that the bulk of the movie is meant to be a cinematic recreation of the effects of LSD. As such, anybody who has not partaken in the drug, and is at the least curious, may use Paul as a experiential vehicle. And if any legitimacy is to be afforded to what “The Trip” presents as chimerically accurate, then “experience” is indeed an appropriate adjective.

Speaking of experience: the titular trip in question is one that I cannot offer any personal sense of contrast and comparison, for the sake of any legitimized evaluation. I will say, without any pretension or high-horse-itude, that I have never taken drugs, let alone LSD. My point is that I can’t gauge the quality of accuracy of the LSD experience pictured here. Just the same, this is not the point of viewing and reviewing the film on its cinematic merits; nor should it be, even if the LSD trip is ostensibly the impetus for anyone to see the movie to begin with. And this is understandable from the viewpoint of there not being much else TO this film apart from the trip. The hallucination is contingent upon the development and understanding of Peter Fonda’s character; we discover things about Paul in direct parallel to Paul himself. The intellectual motivation behind mind-altering drugs such as LSD is purportedly one of consciousness expansion and introspection. If this is given as the film’s concept, then one could see it as a film of character development, introspection, and self-discovery no different from any other style of film.

The style of this film, then, is immensely abstract and experimental, albeit with a very loose but accessible sort of continuity. Reoccurring themes and concepts come and go, as Paul traverses what could otherwise be corralled into just a very strange fantasy tale. Ominous figures in black ride on horseback, reminiscent of “The Lord of the Rings”. White-greasepainted sentinels seem not dissimilar from the depiction of “Death” in Bergman’s “The Seventh Seal”. Fonda’s character even wanders a medieval mansion, albeit with a small merrygoround in the basement. The navigations between scenes are bizarrely and often harshly carried by way of strobing lights, stuttering sound blasts, and wildly flashing colours so violently and quickly iridescent that one can’t help but wonder if those myths about seizure-inducing colour effects could be true.

Insert joke about morning breath on LSD here. Or not.

The experience is alternately bearable and eye-frying, as one would assume such psychedelic intensity to be to the person under such an influence. But “The Trip” maintains an appropriate anchor to reality, in the form of Bruce Dern’s John. His purpose is not so much to guide Paul through the trip (even with Paul describing what he’s experiencing, John can only assume what is really happening), but rather to monitor and protect Paul from physical harm, either as chemical side-effects upon the brain or simply Paul drowning in the groovy above-ground pool running in and outside of John’s pad. Indeed, the first section of the film/trip is largely controlled, if only uncertain. Even if what Paul experiences becomes unpleasant, he’s still “safe” in the apartment. That is, until he’s able to sneak out late on. The film and the hallucinations take appropriately darker, more fearful turns, albeit closer to the drug finally wearing off (it lasts the better part of a whole day and evening).

As stated earlier, the relative ambiguity of character and plot that opens the film is somewhat effective. What the story lacks is a proper sense of closure. Even if one can assume a sort of dissonance-to-consonance, tension-to-relief satisfaction of Paul’s “comedown”, the question becomes, is that enough? If the point of Paul’s LSD trip, and thus the point of the movie, is theoretically for Paul to come to some sort of introspective summation of himself and his woes… well, where is it? Did Paul really discover anything? The viewer may have been able to deduct and surmise some elements, but there’s no indication that Paul has done so himself, much less come to a personal conclusion.

Peter Fonda’s performance here, incidentally one of his earliest starring roles, is decidedly fairly bland. This again can lend to the protagonist-as-anybody approach, as we do want the character of Paul to be as “normal” as can be, in terms of a regular guy trying LSD for the first time. There’s also a contrast between his quiet, sober personality, and the wild experience he enters and must narrate to John (aka the audience) with wide-eyed fascination rooted in uncertainty. This, again, is presumably the ideal reaction from the audience. We don’t know what’s happening, we get uneasy if not scared at times, but we’re here on purpose because we’re fascinated by the possibilities. Most other roles are near equally as flat as Fonda’s, even if they can be justified as “appropriately weird” when occurring within Paul’s mind. Bruce Dern is ultimately the strongest performance, though one wonders if this is due to Paul’s, and perhaps, the audience’s, reliance on Dern as the voice of reality and reassurance, in an almost motherly capacity. (Author’s Note: This is the fifth time, in writing this tonight, that I’ve forgotten Bruce Dern’s name, and subsequently had to think back to Jim Carrey doing an impression of Dern during a tribute to Meryl Streep. Sorry, Bruce, I kept wanting to call you John Herd.)

Despite its year and indie-feel, “The Trip” is a decidedly clean, clear film, with perfectly lucid picture, color, and sound. Everything just plain looks and sounds good, which is odd, considering one might expect a lower-fi, grittier sort of grindhouse quality to be more appropriate, at least to the hallucination scenes. The photography is decent, the locations wide in range. What is most impressive, from a technical standpoint, is the editing and effects of the LSD sequences. Many scenes make strong, creative use of film-projection techniques, imposing images and flashy effects upon walls and, most effectively, actors’ faces and bodies. While this could creep into “typical film student experimentation”, the use of such techniques is spare and appropriately timed. Timing is what impressed me the most, as it is readily apparent how much painstaking time and effort went into the splicing-and-dicing of video and sound, creating super-tight stuttering effects that could easily make for a valid addition to a library of experimental music alone.

All in all, regardless of the LSD trip being the catalyst for these effects, a viewer will presumably be entering this film with the expectation that they are going to see and hear some wild, surreal stuff. You may watch it for the drug culture, you may watch it for the sake of experimental filmmaking, and you way watch it because you want to see younger versions of Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper. And if you’re like me, you may watch it because you want to see an oldschool Roger Corman film, perhaps in conjunction with the reasons above, if not others. It is difficult to prescribe this film on purely cinematic, storytelling merits alone, or at least without mentioning all of the above. And that both does and does not reflect the film’s quality. But all of these motivations are themselves reflective of an experience, one way or another, even that of seeing performances of future film stars. If all that “The Trip” is potentially good for is an experience, then much like the character of Paul, it’s up to you to take from the film what you want.

RATING – Three life-glowing oranges out of five

STINGER – I would love nothing more than to include an image or videoclip of the little-person on the merryground suddenly yelling “Bay of Pigs!” for no reason, but I cannot as yet find one. One day…

MOVIE –

DIRECTOR – Duccio Tessari

WRITER – Roberto Gandus, Ugo Liberatore, and Franco Verucci

SIX DEGREES OF CAST & CREW

-This movie has a ton of different titles, depending on where you are. In Italy, it was released as “Tony Arzenta” (and “Tony Arzenta – Big Guns”), “Big Guns” in the rest of Europe, “No Way Out” in the United States, and then it was reissued in France as “Tony le sicilien.” For the sake of clarity, I’m going to call this movie “Tony Big Guns No Way Out Arzenta.” Or just “Tony Arzenta” for short.

-No matter what you call this movie, Alain DeLon is a brilliant actor. He shot to fame as the assassin Jef Costello in Jean-Pierre Melville’s “Le Samourai,” then became one of many actors to take on the role of Zorro in 1975′s “Zorro,” which was directed by Duccio Tessari, who also directed “Tony Arzenta.” DeLon also played Casanova in 1992′s “The Return of Casanova,” and also voiced Julius Caesar in Asterix at the “Olympic Games.” In America, he might be best known as the Concorde pilot from “Airport ’79.”

-One actor American audiences will know is Richard Conte, and not just because he’s one of the few Americans working in Italy in this period. Richard Conte is best known for playing Don Barzini in “The Godfather,” but before he betrayed the Corleone family, he also give his place on the cross to Jesus. That’s right, Richard Conte played Barabbas in “The Greatest Story Ever Told.” He also played opposite Jimmy Stewart in “Call Northside 777.”

REVIEW

Tony Arzenta (Alain Delon) has an interesting life. Sure, he’s got a wife and a young son and all those fun things, but that’s not interesting. What’s interesting about Tony Arzenta is his profession. He’s a contract killer for the mafia. As properous as the job has made Tony, it’s not exactly the kind of life you want for your wife or your family, so Tony goes to his boss Nick Gusto (Richard Conte) to tell him he’s returing.

Nick, in turn, takes this to the heads of the rest of the families, all of whom have used Tony’s services. Losing their best gun isn’t an option, so they send a message to Tony. That message is, “You don’t retire from the mob.” That message is in the form of a car bomb that kills Tony’s wife and son by mistake.

That’s a big mistake. The last thing you want to do is cross a man whose job is to shoot guys who don’t want to be shot. Now Tony is a man on a mission of revenge, and no two-bit gangster is going to stand in his way.

To its credit, “Tony Arzenta” is a moody (if melodramatic) Euro crime thriller, and it’s pretty brilliant in its execution. The violence is shocking and sudden, with very little build-up before gunfire breaks out. The car chases are very well-executed and clever, and the narrow roads of Europe lead to some pretty exciting twists and turns. The revenge executions are varied and very interesting, especially when the gangsters start getting creative.

The only real flaw with “Tony Arzenta,” or at least the DVD I saw, was that the transfer is abysmal. The sound is muddy, the picture is blurry, the soft-focus shots are out-of-focus, and that makes it very hard to follow along. Of course, there’s not a whole lot to follow along with plot-wise: Tony was wronged, his family was killed, and he’s going to kill everyone until he finally kills the people responsible for the death of his family. The end. It’s a simple story, but it’s executed very well.

Honestly, I would love to see this movie again with a better transfer, because the parts I can see (and the parts seen in the trailer below) make the movie look great. The car-chases are particularly well shot, and they use some very inventive camera techniques with where they mount the cameras and how the shots are framed. Duccio Tessari has made a very stylish movie, and it’s one of the better-looking Euro crime thrillers of the decade thanks to Tessari’s background in the spaghetti western industry. (He wrote “A Fistful of Dollars” with about 10 other credited writers.) It has good flow, punctuates its plot scenes with some impressive action scenes, and maintains its energy once it gets started, though it takes awhile to get going.

The best thing going for this movie is the star. Alain Delon is a legend in this genre, and it’s easy to see why in this movie. He’s captivating when he’s on screen, and he takes on a very physically demanding role with grace. Even when he’s not speaking, his expressions and body language just radiate courage under fire. The other characters don’t get as much screen time, which is okay since Delon is the star of the show and is able to pull it off. Even with the dubbing, he’s awesome; the dubbing itself is actually not terrible, since most of the actors dubbed themselves.

“Tony Arzenta” is worth tracking down if you’ve never seen it. If you can find something better than a Greek-subtitled DVD-R, then I suggest watching that version. Maybe try the Amazon DVD below and hope you have better luck than I did with my rental. In spite of all the flaws with my recording, “Tony Arzenta” is a great Italian gangster movie with cool to spare.

RATING – 4 blurry shootings out of 5

TRAILER

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OWN IT: Get “Tony Arzenta” on DVD from Amazon.com!

MOVIE –

DIRECTOR – Menahem Golan

WRITER – Dick Desmond (screenplay), Mike Stone (story)

SIX DEGREES OF CAST & CREW

-Sho Kosugi was a professional ninja for most of the 1980’s. In addition to his turn as the villainous ninja in “Enter the Ninja,” he was the hero and star of “Revenge of the Ninja” and “Ninja III: The Domination,” the unrelated yet still sequelized follow-up movies from Golan-Globus. He was also the featured villain on the Lee Van Cleef TV show “The Master,” better known to MST3K fans as “Master Ninja.” After killing a bunch of fighting midgets (!!!) as Spike Shinobi in “Nine Deaths of the Ninja,” he fought for good against evil Russian agent Van Damme in “Black Eagle,” then tried to kill blind swordsman Rutger Hauer in “Blind Fury.” After some time away from killing, Kosugi made a glorious comeback as the motion capture artist behind the killing in the hit video game Tenchu (and voiced Rikimaru in the Japanese version). A decade later, he resurfaced as the ninja master Ozuno in “Ninja Assassin.” This penchant for ninjatude has spread to Sho’s sons Kane and Shane as well; the two are multiple-time competitors on the program Ninja Warrior (Sasuke), in addition to appearing with their father in various ninja-related ventures.

-As for Franco Nero, the story of how he became an actor is pretty fascinating. He was reportedly discovered by John Huston while working on the set of “The Bible: In The Beginning” as a set painter and cast as Abel because Huston liked his face. As Abel he was killed by Cain (played by Richard Dumbledore Harris). Adam in “The Bible” was played by none other than Michael Parks, best known to Tarantino/Rodriguez fans as Earl McGraw from “Kill Bill,” “Grindhouse,” and “From Duck Till Dawn.” In addition to working with fake Chuck Norris Franco Nero, he worked with actual Chuck Norris on “Walker, Texas Ranger” and “Violent City/The Family” star Charles Bronson in “Death Wish V: The Face Of Death,” well after playing JIM Bronson in the TV series “Then Came Bronson.”

-Enter the Ninja made Sho Kosugi a star. Also stars for Cannon Films and the Golan-Globus collective? Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris, Michael Dudikoff, Lou Ferrigno, and, of course, Charles Bronson. Among the 25 movies released by Cannon and Golan-Globus in 1987 is the wonderful/terrible Masters of the Universe movie starring Dolph Lungdren. Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus are cousins who bought Cannon in 1979 for $500,000; in 1986 they put out a staggering 43 films. Like Roger Corman, who a young Golan worked with on 1963′s “The Young Racers,” the Golan-Globus way is fast, cheap, and plentiful.

REVIEW

Cole (Franco Nero) is the whitest ninja you will ever see. That’s because, as far as his clan goes, he’s the only white ninja. This makes him unique among the ninja, but it earns him an enemy in the racist Hasegawa (Sho Kosugi). Hasegawa is the descendant of Japanese nobility, while Cole is just a run-of-the-mill mercenary. This gives him a background in warfare, but a hatred of guns. This will come into play later.

After learning the secrets of the ninja, Cole is free to roam the world. First stop, the Philippines, where his friend Frank (Alex Courtney) and wife Mary Ann (Susan George) run some kind of farm. I’m not sure what it grows, but it doesn’t matter. What matters is there’s secret oil on that land, and the evil Venarius (Christopher George) wants it. In order to do that, he’s hired a gang of thugs to assault Frank’s workers, ruin the farm, and claim it for himself.

There’s only one problem. Cole, the white ninja, is there and he’s not going to let his friends get pushed around. Venarius’s thugs are no match for a ninja, but you know who is? Another ninja. It’s ninja versus ninja in the Philippines!

The best thing you can say about “Enter the Ninja” is that it has a pair of really good action sequences. The opening of Ninja is a stellar jungle chase scene where a white-clad ninja is pursued by several red-clad ninjas and one black-clad ninja. (Utilizing the color code rules for 80′s ninjas, the white ninja is the good one, the black ninja is the bad one, and other primary color ninjas are flunkies for the bad ninja who vary in skill level. The other stellar sequence is the climax face-off between Cole and Hasegawa. The middle is pretty flabby, but writers Dick Desmond and writer/choreographer/martial artist/Cole stunt fighter Mike Stone do their best to make sure there’s always a fight every few minutes, even if it’s just a fistfight.

Not all of those fights are good, but I appreciate the effort. I also appreciate the fact that in this movie, and unlike a lot of movies, the ninja’s chief weapon is the ninja’s real weapon: stealth and surprise. When the ninja is on the prowl, guys are going to die and never see it coming. That never gets old, and the fact that the ninja use every possible weapon in their arsenal keeps the kills from getting too boring: caltrops, climbing claws, sai, swords, ninja stars, nun chucks, sickle and chains, bows, blowguns, and anything not nailed down. They even work in a bit of ninja mysticism in the form of the kuri-kiri!

The weirdest thing about this movie is the way it sounds. It sounds like everyone (except Susan George) has been dubbed via bad ADR. It makes sense for Franco Nero (who didn’t speak English well at the time) and Sho Kosugi (who probably didn’t either), but I think every actor got dubbed by someone, be they Filipino extras or featured players. Even the Americans, like Christopher George, sound dubbed! It doesn’t make sense, but maybe it was cheaper.

Speaking of cheap, an interesting back story to this particular movie is that Menahem Golan wasn’t originally intending to direct the movie. The movie was supposed to be directed by Emmett Alston, with Golan directing “Death Wish 2.” However, Charles Bronson didn’t want Golan to direct him, so Alston went to “Death Wish” and Golan went to “Enter the Ninja.” Golan’s a competent director, but not terribly skilled. The camera stays static, but that’s a positive thing because it allows Mike Stone to show off his skills, and it is typically in the right place to catch the action (Franco Nero’s action scenes aren’t as good, but they’re still shot pretty well, if not impressively).

This is far from the best of the 80′s ninja movies. Then again, most of them weren’t terribly good. At least “Enter The Ninja” has the bonus of having a pair of legitimate martial arts masters, and the bonus points for being the movie to launch the ninja revolution in the B movie industry. Wildly uneven though it may be, the good parts of this movie are great. It’s definitely worth watching, if only to understand just where this ninja thing came from.

RATING – 3 bent forks out of 5

STINGER

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TRAILER

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OWN IT: Get “Enter The Ninja” on DVD and old-school VHS from Amazon.com!

MOVIE

DIRECTOR – Mark Goldblatt

WRITER – Terry Black

SIX DEGREES OF CAST & CREW

-Dead Heat feels a bit like “Lethal Weapon” with zombies, in that you have a pair of funny buddy cops who get into wacky misadventures. Even though neither Roger Mortis (Treat Williams) or Doug Bigelow (Joe Piscopo) are too old for any shit, “Lethal Weapon” scribe Shane Black has an appearance in this flick as a patrolman. (EDIT: Shane Black is of no relation the brother to this film’s writer, Terry Black.) Shane Black was encouraged to become a screenwriter by his friend, director Fred Dekker who did “Night Of The Creeps.” The two would later work together on “The Monster Squad.”

-Speaking of appearances, three horror legends have roles in “Dead Heat.” One of them is Vincent Price as the villainous industrialist Arthur P. Loudermilk, who you may know from pretty much every awesome horror movie from 1950-1980. The other appearance is a cameo from the lovely and talented Linnea Quigley. She’s a zombie go-go girl in “Dead Heat,” but she’s best known for another undead dance number. She’s Trash, the sexy punk rock girl in “Return of the Living Dead” who performs a sultry cemetery strip before becoming one of the film’s most iconic zombies (she’s even on the film’s poster!).

-The third horror legend is, shockingly, Darren McGavin. Before he was best known as the father from “A Christmas Story,” McGavin played Carl Kolchak. Kolchak was the central character in “The Night Stalker,” one of the highest-rated TV movies of all time; McGavin would also reprise that character for the brilliant TV series “Kolchak: The Night Stalker.” “The Night Stalker” was adapted by Richard Matheson, who did pretty much every good “Twilight Zone” episode, as well as write I Am Legend, which was the basis for Vincent Price’s “The Last Man On Earth” and Charlton Heston’s “Omega Man.” He also did the entire Poe cycle for Price and Roger Corman. Both David “The Sopranos” Chase and Bob “Back to the Future” Gale got their starts on the Night Stalker TV series.

REVIEW

In Los Angeles, businesses get robbed every day. Of course, not every day do the robbers get shot, get back up, and continue on their way. That’s a bit unusual; even the most hardened of criminal isn’t hard enough to resist lead. It’s up to detectives Roger Mortis (Treat Williams) and Doug Bigelow (Joe Piscopo) to get to the bottom of this weirdness.

The two dead robbers get sent to the morgue for a quick autopsy, only for the coroner to reveal that, for some reason, it looks as though the guys had already been autopsied. Even stranger, they disappeared from the morgue before the second autopsy could be completed. However, there was some evidence captured from the bodies before they wandered off. A strange chemical preservative linked to a company owned by an Arthur P. Loudermilk (Vincent Price). This leads LAPD’s finest to a chemical company, where the helpful Randi James (Lindsay Frost) takes the two on a tour. While Doug investigates a suspicious room, Roger encounters the corpse of a biker on a strange machine, gets locked in an asphyxiation chamber and, uh, has his life forcibly removed from him via lack of oxygen.

Whoops. Fortunately for Roger, that strange machine is the resurrection machine, which affords the recently deceased an extra day or two of life. Now it’s up to Doug and Roger to crack the case, shut down the zombie crime spree, and avenge Roger’s death before Roger melts into a pile of unpleasant-smelling goop.

This movie has an incredible cast. While Treat Williams isn’t the best, as a poor man’s Tom Berenger he’s pretty good, and he’s a good straight man to Joe Piscopo. While he’s kind of a forgotten man these days, Joe Piscopo can deliver a one-liner like nobody’s business, and Terry Black’s script gives him a lot of one-liners to throw around. Plus, his arms are huge here, and he’s in the best shape of his life, so he puts the action in action and comedy in comedy. Still, you have to feel bad about poor Vincent Price; this is one of his last movies, and it’s obvious from his appearance and labored breathing that his emphysema was certainly affecting his health. Still, even an appearance from later-years price is fun to behold, even if the script doesn’t give him only one or two of those kinda-funny/kinda-creepy scenes he’s known for. Darren McGavin is a fun stand-in villain for Price, and Keye Luke is a great go-to Chinese guy.

The movie moves at a brisk pace, lingering to let jokes sink in, but never getting bogged down. I suppose the quality movement is due to director Mark Goldblatt being primarily an editor (though he also did the 1989 Dolph Lungdren version of “The Punisher”). There’s nothing spectacular about the direction, but it’s steady and competent, and doesn’t interfere with the comedy.

“Dead Heat” is a pleasant surprise from the very beginning. Let’s not kid ourselves: nothing gets dated faster than something from the 80′s, and “Dead Heat” is 80′s from its very opening credits to the glorious hair of Joe Piscopo. It is both the best and worst of the 80′s. The violence is surprisingly gratuitous, but it’s also pretty funny. Where else are you going to hear a line like, “Remember back when guns killed people?” What other movie would have one of the stars die halfway through the film? What other movie would have people being attacked by random animal parts in a Chinese butcher shop?

You have to give credit where credit is due. “Dead Heat” is a flawed flick, but it’s also got some incredible sequences, some great idea, and some fun performances. I think “Dead Heat,” like star Joe Piscopo, has been unfairly forgotten. Time to dig it back up, I think.

RATING – 4 dead cops out of 5

TRAILER

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OWN IT: Get “Dead Heat” on Blu Ray, DVD, or old-school VHS from Amazon.com!

MOVIE 

DIRECTOR – Phil Lord, Chris Miller

WRITER – Michael Bacall (screenplay and story), Jonah Hill (story)

SIX DEGREES OF CAST & CREW

-Everyone knows Nick Offerman as the awesome Ron Swanson from “Parks and Recreation.”  If you don’t, you need to look up Ron Swanson on YouTube and thank me later.  However, one of the things I didn’t know about Offerman is that he played Shlubb of Shlubb and Klump fame.  Shlubb and Klump are the two verbally adroit low-level thugs routinely bashed in “Sin City.”

-There’s a serious “Scott Pilgrim” connection in “21 Jump Street.”  Writer Michael Bacall handled both scripts, while Brie Larson played Envy Adams in Pilgrim and Molly in “Jump Street.”  Johnny Simmons also did double-duty, playing Young Neil in Pilgrim and having a role in “Jump Street” as well.  Meanwhile, Aubrey Plaza (Pilgrim’s Julie Powers) plays the lovely April on “Parks and Recreation” with none other than Nick “Ron Swanson” Offerman.  Plaza was also in “Funny People” with Jonah Hill.  Lindsey Broad (slutty Lisa) and Brie Larson also appeared together in the TV series “The Burg.”

-Rob Riggle and Parks and Rec star Amy Poehler both on the television show “Upright Citizens Brigade.”  Speaking or Rob Riggle, he was born in my home town of Louisville, Kentucky.  Riggle was on SNL in 2004-05 with, you guessed it, Amy Poehler.  And Amy Poehler stars in Parks and Recreation with Aubrey Plaza and… Nick Offerman.

REVIEW

Jenko (Channing Tatum) and Schmidt (Jonah Hill) go back a long way. In fact, they knew one another in high school, where Jenko was a gifted athlete but an idiot and Schmidt was a classic wannabe nerd. Seven years later, Jenko and Schmidt meet again, this time while standing in line at the police academy in a buddy comedy meet cute. As they both soon find out, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Jenko is still a great athlete; Schmidt is still incredibly smart. The two decide that they should work together. Jenko gets Schmidt in passable shape while Schmidt gets Jenko to become a below-average (but not failing) student.

Of course, just because the two compliment one another doesn’t mean they’re somehow good cops. In fact, they’re the opposite: Jenko and Schmidt work themselves through the academy, only to become bicycle cops, where they promptly ruin an important investigation while trying to grab a little glory. After being reamed by the deputy chief, the two detectives are promptly shipped on down to 21 Jump Street, where their new boss (Ice Cube) tells Jenko and Schmidt that they’re going to be going under cover as high school students. The goal of Jenko and Schmidt: infiltrate the dealers and their ringleader Eric (Dave Franco, brother of James) and then sniff out the supplier.

For once, a movie explains why they have 30-year-old high school students! Unfortunately for the cops from Jump Street, high school has changed quite a bit from 2005. Can the two grown men adjust to the new reality for teenagers?

There are a surprising amount of references to the original “21 Jump Street,” and a few little meta moments commenting on the fact that this is a remake of an 80′s television show in the form of a revived undercover program from the 80′s, a brief passage which Nick Offerman knocks out of the park, as expected. There are a ton of surprising nods to the original show. Granted, I don’t remember the original show too well, but after having seen the movie and having investigated both IMDb and Wikipedia pages, I’m surprised by just what they brought in. Apparently, screenwriter Michael Bacall (“Scott Pilgrim vs. The World,” “Project X”) is a fan, or at least did a lot of research. He also has a ton of fun with various high school stereotypes, contrasting the early 00′s with the early 10′s for good comedic effect.

Still, aside from some vague plot points, this “21 Jump Street” isn’t that “21 Jump Street,” and doesn’t even try to be. This version is a straight-up action comedy, mixed with a little taste of high school drama for good measure. Think “Pineapple Express”; that’s the vibe “21 Jump Street” gives off for most of its run, what with the drugs and guns and general craziness. Yes, at times it gets a little dumb, but it never fails to be pretty entertaining, even considering you’ve seen some of the good stuff in the trailer already.  Directors Phil Lord and Chris Miller (“Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs”) still manage to keep the movie rolling, space out the comedy and action very well, and even engage in some dynamic camera work in between visual gags (and there are some great ones).

Jonah Hill is Jonah Hill; you know what he does and how he does it by now. He’s the profane funny one, with the brains and sarcasm and undercurrent of angst. As for Channing Tatum, he’s a pleasant surprise. He’s got good timing, makes surprisingly good faces, and gets some laughs with a good physical comedy streak. I have to say, I was impressed. I didn’t expect much, but my expectations for him were surpassed. Supporting players, like Ice Cube, Ellie Kemper, Rob Riggle, and Nick Offerman, are generally underutilized, but still quite a bit of fun.

The action comedy is relatively new genre, but it’s one that has been done fairly often in recent years. While “21 Jump Street” isn’t a highlight of the current vintage, it’s one of the better ones in awhile. There’s something to be said for a consistently entertaining movie. Even though it’s light on plot, there’s a lot of fun things going on and some fun performances to keep things lively.

RATING – 3 bicycle cops out of 5

TRAILER

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OWN IT: Get “21 Jump Street” on Blu Ray or DVD from Amazon.com!

Someone's face is about to get punched.

The 1989 action movie classic “Road House” is one of the face-punchingest movies in movie history.  Just how face punching?  Well, it contains about 45 seconds total of people being punched in the face.  Not fight scenes, not stomach punches, just fist into face action.  Consider the fact that it takes less than a second to punch someone in the face, and you’ll see just how impressive–and how impressively full–this movie montage is.  From the fine folks at Red Letter Media, here’s every face punch in “Road House” for your viewing pleasure.

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Now THAT is a movie.  Patrick “James Dalton” Swayze, you were the man back in your day.  So much glorious face-punching!

Image: Sublime Monkey/James Dalton For President

You might even say that these climactic speeches are the whole point of a romantic comedy. We want to see someone bridge that gap between “it will never work” and “happily ever after,” armed only with the power of words. And the way you cross that chasm is by not caring if you fall. You have to lose your cool, drop your guard, and swing for the fences.

Now, this isn’t exactly the most romantic website in the world, but even us jaded horror and cult movie nerds have hearts. So, in honor of the day–and to pay respect to the awesome montage–here’s how Hollywood says “I Love You.” Happy Valentine’s Day, guys.

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Warning: It may suddenly get dusty.

And I couldn’t be more excited (and maybe a little inspired).

The film has already seen sporadic film festival screenings since 2010, and looks to be released full-theatrical sometime this year. It’s a Canadian production, and this trailer is courtesy of the Whistler Film Festival (of Whistler, British Columbia).

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Axe may not appear in this movie.

SIX DEGREES OF CAST & CREW

- Actor Danielle Harris can be seen in 1991′s “Don’t Tell Mom The Babysitter’s Dead”, along with John Getz. Mr. Getz would later be seen in “Zodiac” (2007), as directed by David Fincher. Mr. Fincher also made his feature debut directing 1992′s “Alien3″, which, instead of Sigourney Weaver, almost starred… Michael Biehn!

- Speaking of Danielle Harris, both her and actor J.C. Brandy share a commonality: they both played the role of Jamie Lloyd in “Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers” (1988) (Harris), “Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers” (1989) (Harris), and “Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers” (1995) (Brandy).

REVIEW

On February 10, 2011, Michael Biehn “victimized” Edmonton, AB. Seeing as that’s where I live, I figured I should experience the special double-bill showing of two new films, both starring the actor in question, Michael Biehn (of “Aliens”, “The Terminator”, “Planet Terror”. Not only did Mr. Biehn star in both new films, but he happened to have directed and screenplay-ified one: 2011′s “The Victim”. And while the other film, “The Divide” (also ’11) is due its own extensive discourse and review, today we shall focus on “The Victim”.

One’s primary fascination with this film, and arguably the primary reason for anyone to see “The Victim” to begin with, is that Biehn didn’t merely screenwrite and direct it: he went full on D.I.Y. With limited resources and time, and a small, devoted and familial cast and crew wearing many production hats, “The Victim” was conceived and created in less than two weeks, for less than a thousand dollars. The impetus behind this ramshackle endeavour was pure associative inspiration; after working with director Robert Rodriguez on 2007′s “Planet Terror”, Biehn was left wholly impressed by Rodriguez’s longstanding and far-reaching beliefs and promulgations towards independent filmmaking. Lovers of the genre are often knowing of and bemused by the story behind Rodriguez’s explosive D.I.Y. starter, “El Mariachi” (1992): the man took stock of what he had at his disposal, and with not much more than a guitar, a turtle, and a credit card, proceeded to kick down the door to Hollywood action filmmaking.

Our story begins with a little walking-trail lovin’ in wooded California, and the accidental-or-not death of a stripper (Mary, played by Danielle Harris) at the hands of high-ranking police official Harrison, played by Burt-Lancaster-fathers-Casey-Affleck-looking Ryan Honey). After a lengthy “The Shining”-esque (Biehn admits this) driving sequence, Michael Biehn’s character, Kyle, comes home to his nearby cabin for some book reading and e-meditation. A scared-witless blonde woman (Annie, played by Jennifer Blanc-Biehn) is soon banging at his door, apparently on the run from the aforementioned Harrison and his police partner, Cooger (Denny Kirkwood). Kyle hastily decides to hide Annie once Harrison and Cooger show up not long after. Trips are made back to the scene of the crime, torture and fight sequences are exchanged, an open-ended plot twist is utilized (and well-delivered), and we’re done!

I hasten to encapsulate things so brusquely here, but, truth be told, it’s a fairly brusque film to begin with. It doesn’t feel fast, if only because of a few unnecessarily drawn out driving and flashback sequences, but all in all there’s not much to the story. A viewer’s first experience with “The Victim” will actually have you expecting some sort of twist by the end, and so you find yourself questioning characters and their motives. Who really killed who? Who really is innocent, and who are the victims? Herein lies a major strength of the film, if only within the first viewing: a quizzical whodunnit unfolding before all the dunnit’s are even dun. With a conspiracy theorist outlook, one can envision all sorts of possibilities. Are the cops really the villains? Did certain characters ever exist to begin with? And of course the most obvious question so obvious it answers itself: There has to be more to Biehn’s character than meets the eye.

Unfortunately, a lot of these potentialities end up non-existent, though not necessarily leaving the movie at fault. Any weaknesses in story and plot are, truth be told, fairly miniscule. It’s a simple story, and largely told well. If anything it’s dialogue and delivery thereof that can be off-putting. So many little moments of speech come off as poorly or unnecessarily written, and in turn performed with unnecessary pretence or lack of restraint. Blanc-Biehn and Honey are the chief proprietors as such, if only because neither have much acting experience to begin with. Just the same, this is Michael Biehn’s directorial debut, and so he can really only extract so much talent, even from himself; both Biehn’s character and performance are uneven, though one could connect this with the twist ending. Ultimately the “Best Performance” credit goes to Danielle Harris, if only because she’s been acting since 1987, at age ten.

Where you Biehn all my life?

Visually speaking, “The Victim” is strong and consistent. Despite the 12 day production, everything from photography to lighting to action and driving sequences just plain looks tight. The film is pretty well evenly placed in broad daylight or dead of night, and filmed day-for-night anyway. The difference ends up negligible, as most night sequences are filled with taut, suspense dialogue and outright action. Biehn’s character even pokes a bit of fun at the cost effective day-for-night technique, by saying, “The moon is so bright I could read a book if I had one!” Aesthetically speaking, the audio is perhaps one of the film’s greatest strengths. Scoring and sound effects are mixed with warmth and appropriate volume, and custom made background music is charming and, oddly enough, age appropriate to the cast in terms of genre.

The pre-and-post- screening talks from Biehn (and some of the cast and crew) served to shed some amusing, fascinating, and D.I.Y.-inspiring insights to the film. On a strange note, Biehn prefaced the screening by asking the crowd to “not take it too seriously”, tying to the press release insistence that this is a “grindhouse” style movie. I can’t say I wholly agree with that vibe, but more confusing was Biehn’s preface. It seemed we were to expect “The Victim” to either be a black comedy, or a so-bad-it’s-good drive-in experience. And while there were several moments, primarily of over-the-top dialogue, where the crowd did end up laughing, I couldn’t help but feel a bit awkward. Was Biehn implying that there were some not-so-good acting moments, and thus saving himself some post-screening embarrassment (or review)?

What was most impressive about both the film and Biehn’s post-screening talk was his embracing of indie filmmaking culture. At age 56, it was very endearing to hear the man speak so encouragingly toward this new generation of aspiring storytellers who can make professional-looking productions with relatively cheap means, and exploit easy publicity viewership by way of the world wide web. Just remember, kids: if Cpl. Hicks can do it, so too you!

RATING – 3.5 police moustaches out of 5

STINGER – “I could read a book out here if I had one!”

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MOVIE 

DIRECTOR – Gordon Parks

WRITER – Ernest Tidyman, John F.D. Black

SIX DEGREES OF CAST & CREW

‑Director Gordon Parks brings an intense visual style to “Shaft.”  That’s easy to do when you’re a professional photographer for Life Magazine.  Parks is also the co-founder of Essence Magazine; Parks’s Hitchcock cameo is as the landlord Shaft grills when out looking for Ben Buford.  Shaft is also seen reading Essence magazine during the movie.  Parks was the first black person to direct a movie for a major studio, when he helmed 1969’s “The Learning Tree,” which was based on his autobiography.  (Also, according to IMDB, Parks was close friends with Candace Bushnell, who wrote/inspired “Sex and the City,” but let’s not hold that against him.)

‑Two famous blaxploitation names were in the running for the role of John Shaft.  One of these was Isaac Hayes.  He obviously didn’t get the part, but producers were so impressed by his musical resume (he was one of the originators of the Memphis Sound and worked with Otis Redding and Booker T & the MGs among others), that they gave him the job of scoring the movie.  Hayes was the first black person to win an Oscar for Best Original Song.  He would later get that coveted leading man part in 1974’s “Truck Turner.”  The female vocalists for Hayes’ immortal Theme From Shaft were Telma Hopkins and Joyce Vincent Wilson from Tony Orlando & Dawn.

‑The other famous name gunning for Shaft was Ron O’Neal (who producers felt was too light skinned to play Shaft).  O’Neal would get his blaxploitation fame in 1972’s “Super Fly.”  ”Super Fly” was directed by Gordon Parks Jr., son of “Shaft” director Gordon Parks.

‑As for the man who won the role of Shaft, Richard Roundtree, he played Shaft a total of five times:  ”Shaft,” “Shaft’s Big Score,” “Shaft In Africa,” “Shaft (the TV series),” and “Shaft” (the 2000 remake, as Uncle Shaft to Samuel L. Jackson’s Shaft).  He’s also a breast cancer survivor, having been diagnosed with the disease in 1993 and having beaten it.  He now speaks to groups about educating men on the dangers of breast cancer and the importance of early detection and treatment.

REVIEW

Before we go any further, just watch this clip of Isaac Hayes playing the Theme From Shaft at Wattstax in 1972.  I’ll wait; better yet, let it load, then let it play while you read this review.

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John Shaft (Richard Roundtree) is the baddest private detective in all of New York City.  From Manhattan to Harlem, everybody on the streets knows Shaft, and most importantly, they know not to mess with Shaft, because he’s the baddest cat to ever don an incredible leather trench coat.  When you need something done, or when you need information, Shaft’s the man you go to whether or not you’re the cops, Harlem gangsters, or even the Italian mafia.  It’s these last two that land Shaft in the toughest case of his life.

On one side, the cops are pressuring him for information.  The black nationalists want Bumpy and his drug-peddling ways out of Harlem.  Meanwhile, Bumpy Jonas (Moses Gunn) has hired Shaft to get his kidnapped daughter back from the Italian mafia.  The mob wants Harlem, and to get Harlem they either need to get Bumpy Jonas to accept their terms or they need to get rid of Bumpy and his men, hence the kidnapping of Bumpy’s daughter.

Things are rapidly spiraling out of control, but when you’re the coolest cat in the world, nothing’s too crazy.

Richard Roundtree’s Shaft is an incredible performance.  He’s the coolest guy in the room at all times, even when he’s throwing guys out a window, being shot at, or nearly being hit by a cab while jaywalking.  It’s a credit to Roundtree that he’s managed to nail such an iconic role in one of his first film performances, and it’s a credit to the character that Shaft remains an iconic detective, alongside Philip Marlowe, Sam Spade, or even Sherlock Holmes in his deerstalker hat.  Part of this is the movie’s ultra-70’s feel, and part of it is the fact that Shaft is above all politics.  He’s friends with blacks, whites, gays, straights, and even cops.

As in the original stories, Shaft is a private detective who is black, and not an overt black radical or even a political figure.  He negotiates political situations, but Shaft utters no rallying cry for black nationalism; Shaft just wants his money and his women and to solve crimes.  Sure, the script contains a lot of the standards of blaxploitation fare, but it’s not overly offensive to white people, gays, or women (basically anyone not a black male).  The script also has some pretty funny moments, especially when Shaft is chatting with Detective Andruzzi (Charles Cioffi).

Gordon Parks, as a photographer, really knows what to do with a camera and how to frame shots.  Granted, most of his shots are fairly static, but that doesn’t matter when the shots look so good and the transitions are done so well.  Parks’s camera makes 1970’s New York look like a gritty, grimy, busy, bustling, exciting place to be, even if you don’t want to be out on the streets after dark.  This is a beautiful film, no doubt about it.

Even now, 40 years later, Shaft remains a vital, impressive work of cinema.  Not just from a black director, or in a black genre, but just as a movie period.  It’s no wonder that Shaft (and Sweet Sweetback’s Baadasssss Song) helped kick off an entire genre of imitators and spoofs while inspiring an entire generation of writers, directors, and actors across all races.

That Shaft is one bad mother-… well, I best shut my mouth, even if I am only talkin’ ’bout “Shaft.”

RATING – 4 defenestrated thugs out of 5

TRAILER

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OWN IT: Get “Shaft” on DVD or old-school VHS from Amazon.com!