Codytalks.com

An honest question for parents... re:Education

2012-01-06T15:38:00.000-06:00

I've got an honest question for parents that I would love to have answers in the comments... hopefully it even creates a back and forth in the comments, a discussion. We will see...

Ok, Here's the question...

If your child graduated high school and chose not to go directly to college because they didn't know what they wanted to study, how would you feel, would you be disappointed?

I need to set some ground rules, because I want it to be specific.

1. I specifically mean they chose to not attend college. Not they couldn't get in, money prohibited it, they got strung out on video games and forgot to show up, for this question and your response... your child made a choice not to attend college.

2. For the sake of this particular discussion, assume their reason actually is "they don't know what they want to study." Don't put in the comments "my kid would never do that" or "I never thought about it cause that doesn't sound like my kid" -- for the sake of this post, assume they did.

3. I have an answer of my own, but I want to see what folks say, I want to see if it reaffirms my thought or changes it, I wanna learn from your responses.

4. Please, on this post, put your responses in the comments here on the blog, not on Facebook or Twitter or Google Plus... I think it will make a cool back and forth... please?

5. No other rules... cut loose in the comments.

I would really love a ton of conversation on this one, I don't ever ask for this, but if you don't mind share this one on FB or Twitter or Google Plus or email the link. Please?

What the hell was I thinking...

2012-01-04T11:43:00.000-06:00

Almost 4 years ago I started writing on this blog... (first post ever is right here)

I didn't really know what my motivation was... I just wanted to see if I could do it. I quickly realized I loved discussion and conversation. I'm not a real social person in real life, so I made a conscious decision to try and use CodyTalks to get the discussion and conversation I wanted about topics I wanted input and back and forth on.

I also speak in front of people a lot about all kinds of issues, I don't know if I am any good at it, maybe I just do it selfishly because I enjoy the conversations so much. I really no kidding love helping people think out loud about an issue and just make a hard core effort towards both of us becoming more intelligent about it.

Over the past few years a few people have said "Cody, you should write a book". Not smart people or anything, mainly half-drunk friends of mine, but some people have said it.

So, I wrote a book. I am writing a book.... It was done 2 weeks ago... but now its not.

It may never actually be done, I kinda hope its never done, but we are gonna print some copies of it before the end of March. I have zero expectations of selling anymore copies than I buy myself to give to people, but we are going to give it a whirl.

With all that in mind, here's some things going on around it...

The book has a Facebook page - there's not much there... but if you are into liking a Facebook page for pity... click here. The Facebook page will become a much bigger part of the interaction after the book is launched.

The book has a twitter account... again... there's currently 2 tweets... but ya never know... it's here and it will be much more relevant once the book launches.

I even launched a Google Plus page for the book (I created it about 30 seconds ago) it's here and I think by the time the book is printed it maybe the coolest place for discussion about it.

One last thing and this one I want everyone's help with...

I am going to open certain sections of the book up for group discussion before I send the final copy to be published. I have created a Facebook group to trying and help facilitate this. You have to ask to join the group... but everyone that asks will be allowed in... I think that since the whole book is about learning and conversing together about issues in life... the book should be based on conversation and other's input instead of me just babbling... So seriously, I want you to join this Facebook group and give me your input... if you want... it's here.

Thanks so much... seriously.

Holy crap I jacked this up...

2011-12-29T10:18:00.000-06:00

I screw up alot... I think it's because I wanna do everything in life...

I recently discovered that I made some communication errors and really jacked up a client, who was also a friend's Christmas business. I F*#&king hate screwing up and especially when it hurts someone else.

So I'm sorry.

I am typing a post about it because I learned a long time ago that admitting and getting it out in the open is the only way I can guarantee I learn from it and make less mistakes in the future.

If you want to learn and grow from my dumbass mistakes... just know this, admitting when you jack something up is the key... lying to yourself or others by trying to defend a mistakes just kinda makes you an asshole and... a liar. Listen to me... believe me... I am an expert on this subject.

I wanna be a photographer....

2011-12-21T09:03:00.004-06:00

I don't really wanna be a photographer... we will deal with that after the pictures...

Last night and this morning the ice covering everything combined with the ridiculous flatness of South Central Kansas has made for some very cool Sunset and Sunrise hit grass and trees covered in ice picture opportunities. So... I took some pictures...

The sun coming up this a.m. taken from our driveway.

The sun going down last night taken out our back door.

You can click on both pics for bigger versions.

In both instances above the real beauty of what was going on caught my eye... made me say to myself "wow that's amazing..."

Then I had this conversation with myself:

A. "That would make an awesome pic Cody... get a pic.."

B. "You should go get the nice camera, it's only 30 feet away in the house"

A. "But I have my phone right here with me"

B. "That's stupid you have a really nice camera that would take a much better pic"

A. "Yeah but I have my phone right here with me"

B. "Then why the hell do you even have a nice camera?"

A. "I don't know... but I have my phone right here with me"

B. "You're stupid go get the camera"

A. no response... click of the camera... on my phone...

I don't really have the patience or the desire and especially the knowledge to be a photographer... but I do like catching cool stuff and sharing it with folks... so I will keep hiring people that know what they are doing when it matters...and probably keep arguing with myself.

BTW... My wife is much better at catching awesome pics than me and she got some too... click here.

"where are all the bad people at?"

2011-12-20T15:53:00.001-06:00

A friend of mine on Facebook sent me this message today...

"Cody....ok....put this one out there....How do answer this question to a 5 year old..."WHERE ARE the bad people?"

It kinda struck me... made me think.

The first thing that popped into head was... "I love that this 5 year old has that question" ... it's very cool that this kid doesn't know and is inquisitive... my 12 year old asks me a million questions a week... it leads to good thinking, smart kids.

Then I started really pondering what was going on in that kids mind and what I felt an appropriate response was.

I gotta make assumptions... actually understanding the mind of 5 year old is truly an impossible task.

I assume this child has lived in an environment that has not lead to being around people normally classified as "bad"... this is a good thing! I am not a fan of sheltering older kids/teens from the potential evils of the real world... but at 5... yes... its ok if the warthogs on kung-fu panda are the most evil things they have been physically exposed to.

I am also assuming that this child's parents have discussed things with them about "not talkng to strangers" and other mandatory parenting phrases... I am assuming that is where the question derived from.

Ok assumptions out of the way... it's very interesting to me to ponder good and bad ways to answer kids questions.

I don't know the answer to how to answer this little one's question... but I wanna discuss some things I think are do's and don'ts.

Don't lie to the kid: I don't think you should tell them "don't ever worry about it" or "There's no bad people in our world." It's good the kid is wondering, it's a natural instinct in children to wonder how things work, it's how they learn and become smart productive adults. But, if you lie to them... they became dumb adults, misinformed adults. Not saying you have to go into details with them about the bad things people do, or FBI National Crime statisitics... but it's good for the kid to know our world isn't all cartoons and reality shows. (A few of the bad people are on reality shows)

Do stop everything else and converse with the kid: I see so many people (and have been guilty myself) of giving the over the shoulder dismissive response to children asking questions like this. The kid yells out "Hey Dad why do you have to got to work everyday?" and Dad nevers takes his eyes of the T.V. and yells back "because my boss says so"... conversation ends and the kid just got dumber instead of smarter. Take the time to face them, get on their level and converse, discuss the question. In my opinion the single best parenting trait I have is the willingness to say to my kids "I have no freaking idea, but Google might" we break out a phone or laptop and try to figure out the answer to every question we can. I'm pretty dumb... so my kids are masters of research... Plus I get smarter in the process... Me likes being smarter.

Like most of my posts... as I get to the end... I have no idea what the hell I am talking about here... but its was fun talking to myself as I typed.

I think my response would have been:

"Well buddy, there are some bad people in every place in the world... and we have to be aware of that, but always remember that in every place there are more good folks than bad. So trust your instincts and find the good folks you can trust and be a good trusting person to them" ... I imagine the 5 year old would have said "What's instincts daddy?" and I would said... "don't worry about that... I will be here to be a daddy til you figure that out" ... or something like that.

As a Former Marine... what do I think of "shooter" video games...

2011-12-16T16:17:00.001-06:00

Someone asked me on Facebook one time to write a blog post about what I, as a former Marine, thought of "Call of Duty" and other "shooter" or military styled video games.

Not claiming to be any kinda of expert... I was asked my opinion.

I can only assume that this person was wanting my thoughts on the effects that playing these kinda of games can/do have on peoples (mainly young peoples) minds and thought processes...

So here's my thoughts..

If your kid (really anyone for that matter) sits and stares at a game or movie or for that matter reads a book... that is solely based around the concept of killing others until you die, but oh wait, you come right back after you get shot... I think there is a huge potential that person will become very de-sensitized to the reality of shooting someone or being shot... and not have a grasp of how "final" death is.

That being said... In my house there is a Playstation 3 and we own 3 versions of "Call of Duty" and a few other "shooter" games. I play them with my son... he plays them alone some...

Why?

1. Because... we parent our kids... we control the amount of time spent on them. We don't just yell at them and bitch to our friends how much they play video games... we make them stop... we set limits... they stop when we stay stop.

2. But even more important, my son and daughter are aware of the finality of the pulling the trigger on a real gun, the severity of death, the reality of the fact that our Military People are coming home from that shit hole of sand without limbs, with bullet holes and in caskets. They are very well tuned to the reality of the dangerous nature of being a Law Enforcement officer. We talk to them about the news and the real world and force them to think about it.

If #1 and #2 are happening... "Call of Duty" is just a game, that my 12 year old kicks my ass at.

Do I think "Call of Duty" could lead to people doing horrible things... No.

Do I think that allowing your kids to be babysat by a video game and not making them understand the real world, can lead to kids with no grasp on reality, and maybe they do horrible things because of that... absolutely Yes.

Guns don't kill people, Cars don't kill people, Video Games don't kill people...

It's possible to Kick Ass... without being an asshole..

2011-12-15T09:24:00.000-06:00

I probably way over use the phrase "Kick Ass"

I tell my kids to "Kick Ass today" when I drop then off at school.

When someone tells me good news... I often respond with "Kick Ass" and the driving factor getting me out of bed in the morning is that I love the feeling of kicking my to do list's ass.

(Sorry Mom, I know I said "ass" alot there.. )

I explain it to my kids that I think the race to good grades is stupid... and don't care if they have better grades than other kids... I care that they take on their school work/tests... and kick their asses.

In sports its not about "beating" the other team... not about kicking the ass of another human being, it's about taking all the barriers that are between you and realizing the success of achieving your goals... and kicking their asses!

At our jobs... it's not about beating the other guy to the raise or promotion... it's about kicking your jobs ass and earning the raise promotion.

In marriage it's not about acting like your happy for perceptions sake, even though you aren't communicating and solving issues its about squaring off together against those issues... and kicking their ass!

Why bring this up and type the word "ass" 57 times in a post Cody?

Well... funny you should ask...

I see alot of folks that believe that you have to be an asshole... to kick ass.

The point of this post is that the phrase is just a philosophy of attacking your to do list, attacking life, winning the day. It doesn't mean you have to be an asshole. It doesn't mean you have to punch another human being in the face, it means you should punch your tasks in the face, kick your barriers to success' ass.

You don't have to fight the other 3rd grade football coaches or cuss at the refs to be a kick ass dad football coach... that makes you an asshole.

You don't have to sabotage/bad mouth/gossip about your co-workers to get the raise/promotion... that makes you an asshole, not an ass-kicker.

Plain and simple: It is possible to be a respectful caring person and still be an ass-kicker.

*** I wrote and re-wrote this post about 18 times over 2 days... I would love it... then re-read it and hate it... finally I just quit re-writing... not happy with it, but trying to get it where I wanted it, was kicking my ass.

I love the challenge...

2011-12-12T10:55:00.000-06:00

I'm sitting here in my house working...

Yes, I am really working, have a to do list a mile long... and kinda kicking its ass.

I have known for a long time... ( I try to be self aware) that I kinda thrive in mild chaos.. If I feel like I have all my ducks completely in a row...I tend to procrastinate... If I feel some stress to get back to "ducks in a row" status... I kinda kick ass and get everything done. I tried to for years to be different... to be super organized... super prepared... it just doesn't work for me. So... I quit trying to change and relabeled it a strength ("Thrive Under Chaos") instead of a weakness ("Not a big planner, organizer").

Yes, It's just an excuse and I am playing mind games with myself... but it works...

I love a challenge... I love being motivated by the prospect that someone doesn't think I can do what I said I was gonna do.

I don't always succeed and honestly the failures and the shitty feeling after them, provide more motivation...

Really I don't know the point of this post... I hope you folks are kicking ass and either in a great place or rapidly moving towards it... don't sit and wait, don't let other whiners convince you too become one... don't ever be in a rut just because getting out of the rut seems hard or scares you.

Happy Monday.

Do you want drama...?

2011-12-08T08:45:00.001-06:00

I have this theory...

I think a lot of people in this world like drama... they like to make a situation in their lives seem like a way bigger deal than they proportionately are compared to the other things going on in the world.

We refer to them in our house as "drama queens." Male or Female.

It's one of the most counter-productive personality traits that exist... in my opinion.

I have pounded it into my kids brains, not to act like that... not to have screwed up priorities that make you wanna make your situation seem so important or interesting that things that are actually important get ignored or people that are interesting get over-shadowed by your need for the attention.

Don't get me wrong... attention, even the spotlight is a good feeling... but I hope my kids continue to grow and realize that the way to achieve accolades is to earn them, the way to take care of that attention fix is to be a leader, a person that earns respect.

It all boils down to a priority issue, a discipline issue... very hard stuff to parent... but we as a country, are lacking it a bit in 2011.

Dealing with death...

2011-12-05T12:37:00.001-06:00

Last week my Mom's Brother and my Dad's Mother passed away...

Neither were big surprises... neither came as a shock, not that that makes it any easier...

Its never a good thing, but both are done suffering, and that's how the family is looking at it.

I kinda consider myself an amateur psychologist and really enjoy watching people's action in and reactions to certain situations and occurrences in life.

It's amazing the different responses people have to the death of a loved one. I don't think there are any rights and wrongs here and this post will be short so it doesn't have any chance to be perceived as judgmental... I just think it's interesting how different 2 people can react to the exact same situation.

My main lesson learned from dealing with the deaths of friends and loved ones is:

" Live your relationships in a way that when death ends that relationship, you have no regrets..."

Love others in a way that when they are gone... you aren't mad at yourself for not doing something, anything.

I have been on both sides of it and it's way easier to handle a passing when you are at peace with your relationship.

My first day without a job...

2011-12-02T13:11:00.001-06:00

So today is the first day in almost 8 years that I haven't had a job working for LogicMaze LLC.

First off let me say this... if you have any type of marketing needs... LogicMaze and the staff still working there are still a great choice for you and your biz or organization...

So far today I have got the kids to school, change the oil in my wife's car... got my daughter a letter jacket and taken it to the seamtress to get stuff stitched on and panicked because I thought I forgot to pick my son up after a half day of school... turns out he was taken care of.. whew!

I am now spending my time (after I finish this post) lining out next week... meeting and conference calls and arrangements for speaking engagements are going to consume my life next week as I go into full blown panic mode about the decision to work for myself again instead of having a steady paycheck.

My first couple of months look pretty good... lots of work lined out and a couple of semi-steady jobs lined up...

But I have been here before and last time I relaxed ... I didn't stay hungry once a had "a couple of months" lined out... It won't happen again... promise. I have learned a ton from mistakes in my past.. way more than from successes.

Its gonna be a good ride, I promise that... if you wanna come along, this blog will be my therapist... if not... there's way better shit on the internet to read.

Thanks for reading.

Kids and Social Media... the good stuff...

2011-11-23T12:46:00.001-06:00

I had the true pleasure of presenting to 40 or so High School students at Erie High School in Erie, Ks yesterday. The students are part of a program at Erie High School called PLP (Personalized Learning Plan)... all students in America should have access to learning programs like that... but that's a different post.

The presentation was on Social Media, Internet Etiquette and using digital communications as a tool...

It was a pretty unique experience as all the students brought their laptops and were logged on to Facebook and Twitter and Tumblr... in the school ... on the school's wifi .... no... really. They stayed logged in, the teachers were logged in and browsing and everyone was discussing and learning (mainly me probably) and discussing... and discussing...

We went through what not to do... they all knew it already... but it was fun and meaningful to discuss it as a group. We talked about why people do silly, or even downright stupid things on Social Media... kinda became a human psychology discussion, again... maybe more fun for me than them... maybe more informational for me than them... but they interacted, they discussed...

We went through how social media can be a tool to make progress towards your goals and dreams... again they all got it before I showed up... but the discussion was awesome...

I see people... business people... smart freakin' people... talk about how the internet and video games and Facebook are ruining a younger generation... if those people are still in business when these kids from Erie High School hit the business world... the kids from Erie are kick the naysayers asses.

Link to student newspaper article about PLP... if you want to hear more about it.

Passion ... I love Passion

2011-11-21T08:36:00.001-06:00

Quit being a perv... that's not what I meant..

I really love people who are passionate about what they do or are doing...

This last Friday night the Hutch High Salthawks defeated Bishop Carroll in a great high school football game at Gowans Stadium in Hutchinson Kansas to move on to the 5a State Championship game.

One small side note... This is the 8th time in the last 9 years the Salthawks have been in the state championship game. One more minor sidenote... they have won 6 of those State Championship games...

I was a wanna-be color guy on the radio for the game and had a blast.

In the first half the Salthawks made some mistakes and its was pretty obvious to everyone in the stands that Head Coach Randy Dreiling was less than enthused about it when the players committing the mistakes made it back to the sideline. Ok, that was too nice.... Coach Dreiling yelled at them... I'm sure it wasn't all butterflys and rainbows in the locker room at halftime either... but the Salthawks came out and played an INCREDIBLE 3rd quarter and sealed up their chance to head to Emporia this Sat. for another title shot.

I know some of you have made up your minds already and this is futile point... you are gonna attack how "mean" Coach Dreiling is... I won't argue... you just keep it up.

I will contended this... If more folks in the world had the passion for succeeding that Randy Dreiling does... well, plain and simple... alot more folks in this world would be successful, meet their goals, just have smiles on their faces.

I don't condone over the top ridiculousness cloaked as passion for success... I don't condone idiots losing their cool in competition and becoming criminals... I don't condone pushing children so hard that they burn out or get permanently hurt or snap and go nuts... but I do love passion,.

The world could use a little more passion...

Friend?, Hell I got lots of friends....

2011-11-14T16:48:00.001-06:00

When the subject of the movie "Tombstone" comes up... the quotes start flying right?

"I'm your Huckleberry"

"You tell em I'm coming and Hell's coming with me"

The movie literally dominates the movie quote world... maybe Pulp Fiction gives it a run, but few have a chance when judging on both quality and quantity of memorable quotes.

My favorite dialogue from the movie is very seldom mentioned by others when the quotes fly.

They are standing by the creek getting ready for Wyatt's epic gun battle in the water and Turkey Creek Jack Johnson looks at Doc spitting up blood from his tuberculosis... and says

Turkey Creek Jack Johnson: Why you doin' this, Doc?
Doc Holliday: Because Wyatt Earp is my friend.
Turkey Creek Jack Johnson: Friend? Hell, I got lots of friends.
Doc Holliday: ...I don't.

I don't even really have an explanation... I just want to be a loyal person, have loyal people around me, and have my kids grow up to be the kind of friends that understand that statement.

My thoughts on Veterans Day...

2011-11-12T12:08:00.001-06:00

I think Veterans Day is a needed and excellent mark on the calendar of our great country.

It's a great solution to the fact that our busy lives make it very easy to not take the time to remember folks who have sacrificed, all the way up to and including the ultimate sacrifice, so we can do all the mostly trivial things that consume our time.

As I wandered the internet yesterday it was great to see 'Happy Veterans Day" as a trending topic on twitter... its was great to see all the Facebook posts thanking Veterans. I read several great news columns and blog posts... it was good day for America.

But one thing irked me a bit...

I think there's one group of folks out there that, in an attempt to seem intellectual or holier than the rest of us, really put a damper on Veterans Day thoughts, posts and activities.

I started to come across a lot of "It's a shame we only recognize our Veterans on this day" themed posts.

I saw a blog post that can be paraphrased as "the NFL Veteran's Day celebration was only 38 seconds long??, yeah the NFL doesn't really care about Vets" --- I saw tweets to the effect of "you people sicken me for only caring about Vets one day of the year"

It's not the people who speak out against our Military all year round that do the most damage... it's the people that on their special day try to shame folks, and in turn it into " I am better than you cause I care all year round."

Why not just celebrate the day.... I did.

Thanks to everyone out there that ever left their families and did a shitty job for crap pay so I could type on this website and say whatever I want.

Toughness: where's it at...

2011-11-08T08:41:00.002-06:00

You ever think about the word "tough?"

I think its what made America.

People that when they saw something that needed to be done... they just did it.

Imagine getting in wagon train for a 3 month journey and only having the supplies for 2 weeks. Then you get through the "Kansas Territory" and you see the Rockies for the first time... and you still go forward because California is the goal.

I think we have lost some of that... I think we have more and more people everyday that just want to feel success as opposed to earning it.

I see it all the way from little kid sports to grown-ups in the work force to folks buying a home.

In little kids sports, you don't win the game on Saturday... you win the game by working hard in practice and dedicating yourself to being more prepared than the other guy... great life lessons.

In the workplace you don't move forward and improve your situation by showing up late, bad mouthing the boss for being the boss and sitting stagnant while being bitter at the people moving up... you bust your ass... and move up.

In the pursuit of the home of your dreams... you don't just go get it... hell it may take years of busting your hump to get to where you can legitimately afford it... and that's what you do.. bust your hump, that's the American Dream!

Don't ever quit working to make your situation better... and it will get better.

My son's football team and life lessons.

2011-11-04T09:45:00.000-05:00

He got stepped on, his shoe ripped off and still manage to throw the jump pass for TD! ( Sorry... proud daddy moment)

My son has played "Gridiron Gladiators" football for the last 4 years and I have had the pleasure of being one of the coaches each of those seasons. The Hutch Blue Hawks went 29-4 in 4 years and I think everybody for the most part had a lot of fun.

I truly got to love everyone of the boys on the team... each in their own way.

It wasn't always fun... I don't believe in the phrase "all that matters is having fun"... Hard work and seeing the rewards of that also matter. I told the boys a lot that "the most important thing is having fun, but its a lot more fun to win". Learning that working hard in practice, taking the responsibility of being on time, caring about your commitments to the team seriously also mattered on the Hutch Blue Hawks for the last 4 years.

It was never about "beating the other team on Saturday" it was about realizing that 10 weeks worth of camps and 2-3 practices a week, going from dying in the Kansas heat to freezing in the Kansas cold were worth the feeling of success, of being proud of being part of a group that felt success.

We never approached it with the mentality of creating NFL or College football players... we approached it with the goal of doing our part of helping mold young men that would become older men who got that you can accomplish very cool things... if you are willing to put in the work. We drove them hard, we yelled at them some, we made them do a few up downs and runs as consequences... I think, and sincerely hope that they had fun, that they have some pride in what they worked so hard to accomplish and that maybe they learned a lesson or 2.

I personally had the time of my life... I got to spend great hours with my son and an incredible group of boys and watch them all grow over 4 years.

I probably benefited more than any of those boys... but I will continue to kid myself that we did something for them as well.

The post office...

2011-11-03T07:48:00.000-05:00

I think the United States Post office is one of the most amazing inventions in the history of the world. The fact that I can take a piece of paper, stick it in an envelope, slap a sticker that costs less than a can of pop on it and it will show up a day or two later exactly where I want it to, even if that is 2,000 miles away... it's freaking amazing.

I think mail carriers are still one of those groups of people that we should be thankful for. They do a job that can be pretty crappy at times... they don't take weather days and most of them still take a lot of pride in providing a service to the citizens of America. So... "thank you" to them.

I also think both of those things could have been said about the Pony Express and it's riders in 1861.

I have nothing bad to say about the Post Office, it's employees, any part of it... it's been one of the largest factors in the rise of the United States as a world power.

The same could be said for the horse, used in the Calvary in warfare.

I heard on the radio this morning that Congress has a plan for the Postal Service, part of that plan is to NOT quit delivering mail on Saturdays even though it's estimated that it would save the Postal Service 3.1 Billion dollars a year. The reason: "not delivering mail on Saturdays might encourage more people to use other methods of delivery."

wow.

Let's keep running the Pony Express even though it doesn't make enough money to pay its bills because if we quit running it, people will more quickly completely adopt the telegraph.

Let's keep using horses in battle even though our enemy is using tanks because maybe it will slow down the transition from horses to tanks... just a little bit.

huh?

I am NOT saying "get rid of the Postal Service" I still believe some form of hard mail will be being delivered 50 years from now. I am NOT saying the Postal Service is ineffective in the mission it performs, I think they are actually the epitome of efficiency.

I am saying... "quit using pre-school logic to make $3.1 Billion a year decisions."

Major life changes bring me out of blogging hiatus....

2011-11-02T08:12:00.000-05:00

So ... yeah I haven't blogged in about a month and a half, lay-off... it's my blog, I'll blog when I wanna blog. :)

My wife and I have been working together full time for the last 8 years... it's been a wonderful experience (seriously 99.45% of the time I love it). I joined a company that she started and did what I could to help her build it into something bigger. In 2008 we sold LogicMaze to a larger corporation and continued running it... but no longer owned it. As of Dec. 1 of this year our employment agreements are up and we have both decided to move on and try new ventures. (If they don't work... I will add a paypal button to this site... we have kids you know.)

First and foremost... I can guarantee you that LogicMaze will continue to be THE industry leader in this region, there is some much talent there... they will continue to kick ass.

I will come with more details as to how Tam and I intend to pay the bills for the rest of our lives... or... I will come with the paypal button... but just wanted to put it down on digital paper.

I have a great life, not because of me in anyway, because of the people in it.

Thanks so much for reading.

My #140conf Small Town talk... thoughts?

2011-09-21T16:11:00.001-05:00

I had the incredible opportunity to get up and run my mouth about some things at a conference in my hometown yesterday!! Would love a discussion to come from this.

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If you wanna know more about 140conf... just click here

My response to Andrea Anglin's comment on my "Freedom" post.

2011-08-03T15:39:00.002-05:00

Andrea Anglin is a twitter friend of mine... I am pretty sure we haven't ever met in real life, but I have grown to respect her and laugh with her some on twitter and I think she's a cool lady. If you like cool, honest, fun folks and use twitter, I suggest you follow her on twitter here . If you cant imagine making any good friends on twitter ever, that's cool but you and I are different.

I posted a long ranting post about Freedom a couple of days ago here.
Andrea posted an incredible response to in it a comment... you can read her comment on the same link towards the bottom of the page.

This post is my response to Andrea's comment... if you haven't read my post and her comment, just a warning this post might not make sense. Also, if you don't like honest in-depth discussion about things... this post may bore you and you should probably punt here and go to youtube and find a cool kitten video or something.

Let's just go point by point...

Minimum wage: Andrea states that she doesn't think that companies (kinda out of the goodness of their heart) would pay people a proper wage if minimum wage was abolished. She also states that minimum wage is not a proper living wage. I whole-heartedly agree with both points. Completely.

But here's my response: If it is not a proper living wage how is it doing anyone any good? It accomplishes nothing in the world except driving the cost of goods up for everyone, including folks that are earning that amount. Example: I had a friend that ran 2 pizza joints, everyone in the place that worked full-time made more than minimum wage. If you got a full-time job, you started at more than minimum wage. So, in fact, that employer had taken upon themselves to pay the folks that made it their full time job to support themselves off of, more than the Gov. required. But the part time (about 90% college and high school students) help, started at minimum wage. They then worked themselves up based on performance and time in service. When the current minimum wage went into effect in July 2009 he had to increase the starting wage, and the wages of several folks who had been there for some time because all of a sudden they were making less than the people who started. All total just in pay increases due to minimum wage his yearly operating expense rose $28,000 for 2 pizza joints.What should he do? Eat the cost? There isn't that much profit in Pizza. So he raised his prices some... but you can quickly price yourself out of the game in the pizza business, so he started working more hours himself and his wife worked more hours at the store. So the biggest, longest lasting effects of the raise in this instance was higher priced pizza and less total job hours for employees to be paid in this market. To the point of $7.25 being a livable wage... absolutely its not. You can't support yourself on $7.25 an hour... but a high school kid working 20 hours a week can more than pay for gas and car insurance on it. Someone working a second job to pay off some bills can make a quick bunch of dollars off of it. No one will ever be able to support themselves or a family off minimum wage, that's why the argument of raising it or even having it to insure it is providing a livable wage is ridiculous. There are jobs in the world that aren't intended to provide a livable wage. Not only that, there are jobs in the world that it will disrupt the economy and destroy the market to try and make them pay a livable wage. To the argument of employers won't pay employees a good wage: absolutely there are employers who will take advantage of people and their situation. But there is also free market in this country and everyday thousands of people leave their jobs for greener pastures. I am not one to claim that free market is the end all solution to wage discrepancies... but its the best current solution. Our current wage and labor laws have accomplished 2 things... they have driven the cost of goods up (passed what minimum wage will pay for) and the have made using Migrant or illegal immigrant labor seem like the only viable choice to many employers. Most employers will in-fact pay for good help and the ones that wont are going to resort to other detrimental means to get around it. So what's the answer... let the Market decide and work very hard to help more people realize they have choices and can better themselves or their situation. It won't fix everything, nothing will, but the current situation is hurting everyone except the wealthy.

Unions: Andrea brings up valid points about Unions... they started with 100% sincerity to protect worker's safety and insure fairness in the sharing of profits. Let's be completely straight here I think any private sector union has the right to do and demand anything they want. I have never said they should be regulated in any way from demanding ANYTHING they want... it's America, if the Teamster's want a personal assistant for every employee paid for by the employer, the should legally be able to demand that. Andrea also said that she admits that some Unions have gotten corrupt and protect the lazy, I have seen this first hand as well and think it is a bigger problem than many realize, but I also agree that their are many unions still fighting hard to insure quality of work, worker's basic rights and a fair wage. I also think that many Unions don't have any concern for the well-being of the Company, this probably stemmed from the Company not caring about their well-being, but its a 2 wrongs ~~equal~~ a right scenario.A fair market economy will not support people making more money than the job they are doing is worth and we have seen that scenario. I also don't think that Unions in the Public Sector should have the same rights as Unions in the Private Sector. I am completely in favor of Private Sector Unions going for what ever they want... it's the Private Companies fault if they end up giving more than they can afford to give.I do wish that more Private Sector union members would stop and be aware of what they are doing to everyone's cost of living... but I stand by their right to ask for whatever they want. In the Public Sector we are to a point where the Unions are strong enough that are becoming a factor in elections, they are proud of the fact. I don't think that's a healthy scenario... in any fair negotiation, the folks on one side shouldn't be able to have any say on who is sitting on the other side of the table. No, I am not saying Union members shouldn't be able to vote, I am saying the organizations shouldn't be involved in campaigning and politics. Just for the record, I think Good Teachers, Good Cops and Good Firefighters should make more money and I would pay higher taxes to see that happen. I just don't think the current state of SOME public sector Unions is the best option.

Andrea then goes on to discuss "Prostitution" ... (sorry Andrea I feel bad that I drug your name into this convo!)

She brings up completely true and valid points about the horrific facts associated with the illegal pay for sex trade and points out that she doesn't think most prostitutes are engaged in it to pay their mortgage. I think everything she said is true, except the mortgage part. I do think many that involved in it are doing it to pay their bills. Yes of course some (probably more than most professions) are doing it to pay for a drug habit... but folks are working for the postal service to pay for a drug habit as well... any job this is true. But everyone that is doing it because they need the money for legitimate things is being made a criminal for making a contract with another adult to go and do something that is perfectly legal if they don't exchange currency. I would also contend that anything in the world that cannot be eradicated should be legalized and controlled. Alcohol and Drugs have 100% proven that in history. Smoking a joint in my home, having a beer, owning a gun, or having sex for a buck, creates no victim and is only a crime because we create laws that are unenforceable and cost trillions to chase a pipe dream. Would legalizing it make the world perfect? No absolutely not, but it would for sure, relieve under-paid, understaffed Law-Enforcement entities, create a taxable industry and quit making criminals out of consenting adults. It would also create standards and policies for it to be done in a healthy, productive way.

Folks... it's prostitution is illegal for the exact same reason gay marriage still is in so many places... someone chose to legislate their morals on you.

Greed: Andrea talks about Greed next and we just had a mis-communication. She list things like "(not pay taxes or into Social Security or Medicare/caid, food stamps, etc.)" - thats not what I am talking about... I agree they have to pay into those things... I think those things need reworked and modified but we need those things and everyone should pay. I was talking more about wages and the giving of money to programs like research and cultural things. I don't think folks should be forced to pay for things they don't deem essential in most cases. (Yes, there is a gray area here, cut loose)

Andrea's last paragraph is a subjective stance on the overall good of folks. I don't disagree with her, but I also don't think its relevant to the conversation. The fact some bad folks will do bad things is never IMO a legit reason to not let good folks do good things. Also deciding what is good and bad is so often a judgement call. I just think we let morals get into law making and we not only erase some Freedoms to do good, we create criminals that have no victim and we enable some other forms of bad to flourish.

Anyhow... sorry this so long, mega-thanks to Andrea, it was a killer comment and I love the discussion and i will be here for ever so only let it die on this subject if you want.

Lets really and truly talk about freedoms...

2011-08-01T13:28:00.006-05:00

Freedom...

Probably, in my opinion, the most powerful word in the world.

I also feel like it can be the most misunderstood and abused word in the world.

I have always defined Freedom as

"The right to do LITERALLY what you want, until what you want to do infringes on another's Freedom"

It's my definition, doesn't have to be yours.

Sounds overly simplified right? But if taken literally, it actually helps put a concrete grasp on the concept of Freedom. You can take that definition and apply it to any situation.

Guns: Owning a gun does absolutely nothing to infringe on anyone's freedom. Right? I respect the second amendment, believe in Freedom to the core and am a Lifetime NRA member because of it.

But... I don't think some of my fellow NRA members are in it for Freedom... I think they are in it because they love guns and want to protect their right to have one. Which is fine, as long as you don't use the word Freedom in an abusive way or as a veil. If they really wanted to protect freedoms, wouldn't they be just as adamant about...

Gay Rights: Take all the ideological stuff out of it. All of it. It doesn't matter what you think of homosexuals. I honestly think you have the right to think whatever you want about whomever you want. I don't even care if you think its a choice or they are born that way or its a result of environmental conditions or whatever... none of that matters. If you believe in the concept of Freedom... they should be able to do anything they want that doesn't affect any other person's right to do what they want. i.e.Get married.

***Just a quick note... it goes both ways. Gays Rights folks are you fighting for Freedom, or just your initiatives? Either way is fine, but don't use freedom in your speeches if it's not about freedom.

Let's get into some waters that are really muddy and murky.

Do I as an American have the right to sit on my ass and do absolutely nothing all day? Is that a Freedom I possess? Yes! The answer is absolutely 100% yes. The answer is yes because that doesn't infringe on any other American's freedom. There's no debate here... it doesn't.

But... the second I get on food stamps and assistance, because I sitting around all day, not providing for myself or my family the whole story changes. Now I am talking people's money from them. I am 100% violating their freedoms to do what they want. Because you are doing something by choice that takes money from them, this is a violation of their freedom. Am I saying there shouldn't be a system in place to help those in need... No I am not.. I believe everyone that can should want to help people... but I do believe if we make folks help we are violating their freedom. I know there are millions of folks out there that have fallen on hard times... I wanna help them and I will continue to help them forever or as long as I am able... but forcing people to help them is degrading their freedom.Not paying your way through life if you are capable is violating others freedom.

Drugs: Possessing and doing any form of drug doesn't violate anyone's freedoms... ever... should they be regulated and taxed... yes, ummm... just like we do alcohol. Oh... and Guns. Think what a wonderful, logical control we have over the manufacture of guns and alcohol in this country... but we insist of infringing on private citizen's freedom when it comes to marijuana?

Let's get really crazy...

Prostitution: 2 adults can walk out of a bar and go do anything they want (consensually) but as soon as she pays him one dollar for it... no victim, no one harmed, but...it's a crime. Its an infringement on those 2 peoples freedom to enter into an agreement to do business.

Greed: It's gonna make me lose some readers... but being greedy should be protected by folks that believe in Freedom. If I want to hold on to my money and not share it and not do good things with it... I should be allowed to. As long as I got it without infringing on anyone's Freedom. Real world example: minimum wage is the government infringing on business owners rights to be greedy. A piss poor wage doesn't infringe on the employees rights... because they can leave the job. The only person being forced to do something is the employer. Free market will take care of a business that doesn't pay a decent wage. Just an fyi... all it accomplishes is forcing small biz owners to raise prices and make everything more expensive.

So why is it?

It's just as simple as my definition of Freedom... People from both sides of the aisle don't really want true freedom, they want to be selfish and dictate that people can only do what they want them to do. And the crappy thing is they hide behind the cause of freedom to accomplish their initiatives.

Right side wants gun freedoms and business owners freedoms cause they own guns and businesses. But they want to trounce all over the freedoms of homosexuals and folks that like to smoke a joint.

Left side wants to stand up for gay rights, and their right to smoke a joint in the privacy of their own home but they have no problem demolishing the freedoms of gun owners and business owners.

It's a big giant "I am right and you are wrong" instead of "Do whatcha like".

I am not claiming there's a giant quick fix cure for all of this... I know any move towards more freedoms will have some consequences... and of course with more freedom comes more personal responsibility so some folks will not like it, mess it up or just not do it... but it's the only way towards progress.

A huge what if... my thoughts on the debt ceiling debate

2011-07-29T14:12:00.001-05:00

What if...

Ok wait, everyone is mad about this debt ceiling thing right? The Republicans are jackasses for stalling and demanding their ideas be adopted... the Democrats are jerks for sticking to their guns and not compromising... the President is stupid for not making everyone love everyone... Everyone is mad. I heard a MSNBC radio commentator yesterday that I actually thought was gonna have a heart attack he was so upset with Washington.

Ok.. So... What if...

What if, ...this is the perfect example of how our Government is supposed to work.

What if the fact that the 2 houses of Congress and the White House not being controlled by the same party is forcing true compromise and allowing all the representatives we sent up there to be heard.

What if ... this is how it's supposed to work and the way things get streamlined when one party controls everything leads to decisions being made and voted on and passed so quickly that they aren't properly thought out.

What if our need as citizens for instant and precise gratification of exactly what we want is all that is making us mad at this process. (and the media putting it on top of everyone's mind)

This truly is a "what if" I'm not sure I agree with it... but I have been vocal about how stupid I thought things were for the last couple days and wanted to look at it from a different perspective.

If they don't get anything done and a default makes the sky fall... I will know this was a dumb post.

Why I think Jeff Pulver's 140conf is different than some...

2011-07-23T17:17:00.002-05:00

Disclosure: I have gotten to know Jeff Pulver a bit over the last year and am helping with some of the communications for #140conf... I am also excited because we are getting a 140conf in my hometown for the second time.

I have been to a whole bunch of conferences and presentations and tweet-ups and whatevers that have a host of folks telling you how to tweet and work your Facebook to make money and what to blog about and how much better Wordpress is than Blogger... I'm kinda tiring of them. I honestly believe everyone has to find their own path in communications in 2011. It doesn't mean you shouldn't ask folks for help, it doesn't mean that folks don't need to be inspired to "get it", it doesn't mean that people don't need help and guidance with things...

It means "Gurus" need to stop forcing their methods down the throats of people who are just asking for help, in my opinion.

The first time I met Jeff... my initial thought was holy crap this guy has got to drive his Conference Directors absolutely nutso. He stops and talks to Everyone! Not just folks that initiate conversations with him, Jeff will just roll up to folks in cafe and start a conversation. Guy has 400k followers and is constantly replying to people!

Then it hit me, Jeff gets relationships. Jeff wants to meet and actually get to know and learn from people.

Then I went to 140conf Small Town in Hutchinson, Ks ( #hutch ) in November 2010 and I realized that Jeff found and developed the format for a Social Media conference that is about relationships and getting it and learning and being inspired... not about the secret to getting 2000 free followers, about the secret to building relationships that actually work.

We are always gonna have shortcut marketers and communicators, and of course folks that will guarantee they can teach you the secrets to getting it done faster and better than everyone else. Fact is ... its work, its about taking the time to build a relationship, develop a fan base or create a satisfied customer.

If that makes sense to you... come to 140 conf Small Town (in my hometown) On Sept 20th 2011 and take steps toward really getting it.

140conf Small Town Website

Holy Crap I had a major revelation about Facebook today.

2011-07-11T13:19:00.004-05:00

First off, I did have a revelation but I gotta give Robert Scoble the credit for introducing the idea here.

Ok you may or may not know that ~~a lot~~ of some people are and have been upset with Facebook for a long time for hoarding data... for not letting you export your things.

I still completely agree they should let us have anything we uploaded... pics, videos, status updates. I also think Facebook has gotten a little big for their britches and hope Google Plus gives them some competition to kinda level out the online playing field.

But Scoble, in the link above, brings to light a very good point about our contacts on Facebook.

Hold on a sec... I was mad at Facebook about not letting me export my contacts until about 11 minutes ago because I started using Google Plus a couple weeks ago and thought it would be very cool to be able to export my contacts out of Facebook and send them invites to see if they wanted to check out Google Plus. Facebook kept blocking the apps folks were building to do just that. I thought "Facebook is mean!!"

Then I read Scoble's article... He brings to light this point:
Say you and I become friends on Facebook on Monday... that means you are sharing whatever contact info you choose to share with your friends with me now... on Tuesday I use a tool to export all my Facebook contact's contact info and put it in storage somewhere (you can't do this right now, this is for the story only.) Then on Wednesday you decide I am an idiot and don't want to be Facebook friends with me anymore because I keep Facebook messaging and emailing and texting you pics of me in a speedo. So... you just un-friend me right... problem solved... wrong, cause I still have your email and cell number in my little database and the speedo pics keep right on coming.

I was honestly mad at Facebook over this and now I kinda appreciate them for it. Really, I think this is the best instance of a company taking responsibility for protecting my privacy I have seen yet in the social media world.

I still have issues with Facebook and I am not contending this is the best method, but I feel like I learned something today that made understand better.