Actually, I was exposed to much worse as a child, as when my parents got done physically abusing each other, they turned on me, the only minor in the house and there fore the only person they thought could never tell what happened to her. Right. I told everyone I came across, except it all fell on deaf ears. Nothing was done.

Here’s hoping that I am still sane enough to be sent home from the clinic.

Something weird happened as I was finishing this entry. My keyboard went nuts and started deleting everything. I had to take its batteries out. I don’t have the time to check it right now, but I will when, and if, I get home.

Or maybe when they offer me a free trip to the nut house tomorrow, I should go. Not look back. I’ve done it voluntarily so many other times, why not now? Why not get a simple institutionalisation for “free” once? At least they can write on my record that I didn’t suggest it and it wasn’t voluntary, so I’m crazy enough to think I am still sane. Perhaps that will for some other type of therapy, or maybe even something else that is so desperately needed, onto me. New medicines. Surgery, if they’d do a lobotomy, I’d still go. New therapists. New procedures. Maybe in a month or three, it would be recognised that what will really cure me would be a new life. A new family. A new chance just to get the hell on with things and never look back.

It’s a shame, too. I was really looking forward to work on Friday. It was pay day. I’m quite confident that Liz will spend my hard earned money wisely. Probably on hard alcohol and some female condoms. Or maybe even a remodel of the bedroom, you know, to get my touch out of there.

Either way, I’m doomed.

Our presents together. I didn’t know the rose was a pin when I bought it:

On that note, my heart-shaped box of chocolate flavoured pieces of wax was exactly where I expected it to be this morning: On my desk. Hope the birds like it because I’ve tossed it all out the window, box and all. Chloe and I raided the box I bought the other day. Tonight I’m going to try out the AA batteries.

My narcotics are calling. I’m going to answer this call.

And it buried the cars in the process:

I took those with my new camera. It does a pretty good job with the panoramic shots as well. I just wish I could take it somewhere where I can get some really awesome pictures, however I doubt that I will be going on any road trips anytime soon. That really makes me sad because that used to be the heart of my blog. Photos from when I went on road trips when all I had was an Advantex camera and a sleezey digital camera. I spent more time scanning the prints from the trips, and that was when I had a scanner that did not cut off the white space itself. I had to run the image through Photoshop so that none of the quality was reduced on the prints. Now that I have awesome cameras, I don’t have anywhere to go. Yet.

What amazed me was the camera was on a low battery warning, then suddenly it took all the pictures and didn’t shut down once. I was even able to play around with the features on it. Panoramic, video, filters, the works.

Well, I might as well get to bed. Nothing like going to bed and waiting on my chocolate-flavoured wax that Nick somehow thinks is a sufficient enough present for me for Valentine’s Day. Why not? It’s not like I’ve ever given him incredible sex or sucked his dick last night or anything. Oh, and I bought myself my own box of Godiva chocolates. Because much like sex, if I want to be satisfied, I have to do it myself. I also stopped by an electronics store and stocked up on AA batteries. Something tells me that I am going to need them this year. But I’m not complaining. I promise.