COME AND SEE MISSIONS

2017-05-19T09:18:00.000-07:00

Design

. . . He stops upon this threshold
As if the design of all his words takes form
And frame from his thinking and is realized.

Wallace Stevens

Have you considered how much of the quality of your life depends on your "designs"? Think for a moment about the meaning of the word. Apart from its more common use, "design" can mean "a reasoned purpose, an intention." It's often used in a negative sense ("He has designs on his neighbor's wife"), but it can also be used positively. Our designs are our intentions with regard to the future, and, as I say, much that is important to us depends on these designs. High quality lives don't come from inferior designs.

What happens outwardly in our lives is the "manifestation" of what is going on inwardly. Just as a house is the manifestation of what was on the blueprint from which it was made, which in turn was the manifestation of a design in the mind of the architect, our lives are the outworkings of our inward values and goals. If we're unhappy with what has been manifested in our lives, we can always change our designs, and when we do, other things will begin to be manifested.

We owe it to those around us, especially our loved ones, to be more purposeful in our designs. Those who've entrusted themselves to us in friendship and love need to know that we've carefully considered the alternatives and made wise choices in our designs. Haphazard living doesn't just hurt us; it hurts others, too. So we need to be careful.

Ultimately, our designs will turn out to be useless if they run counter to the principles of goodness and honor. We can't operate from selfish or destructive intentions and expect our outward lives to be blessed by abundant joy and satisfaction. We do not live unto ourselves alone, and the laws of human behavior and interaction can't be ignored with impunity. Our designs -- that is, what we plan to be and do -- must harmonize with the good of those around us, and even with the overarching purposes of the whole creation of which we're a part. If they don't, our designs are doomed to be inconsequential.

Direct, control, suggest, this day,
All I design, or do, or say,
That all my powers with all their might,
In Thy sole glory may unite.

Thomas Ken

2016-09-26T09:33:00.001-07:00

Anticipation

There is something new every day if you look for it.

Hannah Hurnard

One of our most remarkable endowments is the ability to foretaste pleasure. The literal meaning of "anticipate" is to "take before," and we have it within us to look ahead (at least a little way) and take enjoyment from our experiences before they arrive. To make this choice and welcome the future with joy is an act of courage. It is also an act of considerable wisdom.

Not everything about the future will be pleasant, of course. But even so, anticipation is a wise choice. As a positive character quality, anticipation gives us a more constructive outlook. By believing the best and acting on our hopes, we find a better future than if we expected the worst. For this reason, Albert Schweitzer, who spent his adult life dealing with life's rough edges, said, "My knowledge is pessimistic, but my willing and hoping are optimistic."

How then can we heighten our anticipation and relish our future? Although it seems contradictory, the primary thing we can do is pay more attention to what happens in the present moment. As I write these lines, for example, it is early spring and the trees outside my window are beginning to bud and blossom. It would be difficult to look at these things thoughtfully and not anticipate (or "take before") the greater, more fully developed beauty they'll have tomorrow morning. So whatever death and decay there may be, let's also see the evidence that many good things in the world are moving, growing, and reaching forward. If we "taste" deeply the present truth about these things, our minds will tingle with anticipation for what lies ahead.

Even when we have no idea what will happen tomorrow, there are still reasons for us to anticipate it. The intriguing mystery of it all -- the very possibility that tomorrow's path may take a surprising turn -- ought to energize us. If life could be completely planned and programmed, we would be "safe" perhaps, but in our hearts we know that we want more than safety. Like the inquisitive, once-upon-a-time children that we used to be, we want to learn more than we know and do more than we've done. There's a bit of the adventurer in all of us.

Still round the corner there may wait,
A new road, or a secret gate.

J. R. R. Tolkien

2016-01-01T00:04:00.001-08:00

2016-01-01T00:02:00.001-08:00

2015-04-16T10:22:00.001-07:00

2015-04-16T10:02:00.001-07:00

MISSIONS

2014-11-04T05:23:00.001-08:00

MISSION WORK

2014-11-04T04:27:00.001-08:00

MISSIONS

2014-10-30T13:38:00.001-07:00

GIFT ITEMS TO BRETHREN, PREACHINGS IN TAKORADI AND NSAWKAW CHURCH GROUP

2014-10-30T13:33:00.003-07:00

2014-10-30T13:23:00.001-07:00

COME AND SEE MISSIONS BRETHREN MY HEART DESIRE TO GOD FOR GHANA IS THAT ALL AND SUNDRY WOULD BE SAVED FROM OUR ERRONEOUS SINS AS STATED IN GALATIANS 5 :19-21. GHANA NEEDS THE GOSPEL OF CHRIST JESUS.

2014-10-22T22:19:00.000-07:00

OUR MINISTRY NEEDS ASSISTANCE TO MAKE PURCHASE OF A VAN FOR OUR TRIPS. PLEASE DO HELP US WITH $4500. GOD RICHLY BLESS YOU. ALL. You may contact : mikeford1984@hotmail.com +233 543430095

2014-10-21T04:09:00.000-07:00

PERSONAL EVANGELISM

2014-08-13T03:34:00.000-07:00

PERSONAL EVANGELISM
INTRODUCTION
1. No one is a natural born soul-winner:
a) I read of mechanics dying, but not being born.
b) I hear of executives dying, but not being born.
c) I learn of personal workers dying, but not of their being born.
d) Conclusion: Mechanics, executives, personal workers, etc., are MADE,
not born.
2. We learn by doing:
a) Reading a book about flying does not automatically qualify one to become
a pilot.
b) Reading about sewing does not make one a seamstress.
c) Reading about farming does not automatically make one a farmer.
d) There must be the practical application of the thing one studies if he is to
become proficient at it.
e) The same thing applies to personal evangelism.
3. Incentives to reach the lost:
a) The lost are doomed to an eternal, burning hell.
b) The gospel is the only way people can be saved.
c) The gospel has been entrusted in our care.
d) We must be as concerned about the lost as Jesus and God are.
e) We must be profitable servants of God.
f) If God were as concerned about the lost as you are, how many souls
would be saved?
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4. Soul winning is the overflow of one’s life in Christ:
a) We are soul-winners, NOT because of WHAT we know, but because of
WHOM we know.
b) Evangelism is not what we DO; it is what we ARE.
5. How does one begin?
a) Pray.
b) Study.
c) Practice.
d) Trust God.
e) Build a good library:
1) Bible concordance.
2) Bible dictionary.
3) Debates on every subject.
4) Bible encyclopedias.
5) Commentaries on the Bible.
6. Why do some people hesitate to share their faith?
a) Some are afraid they will do more harm than good.
b) Some fear failure.
c) Some are afraid they will be rejected.
d) Some do not know what to say.
e) Some do not know how to present the gospel.
f) Some feel it is not one of their talents.
g) Some do not know how to begin.
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h) Some do not know how to close.
i) Some do not feel obligated to do so.
Preliminaries
PRELIMINARIES
1. Purchase an edition of the Bible (or New Testament) that you know you will be
able to replace.
2. Mark your Bible.
3. Read your Bible daily.
4. Schedule personal work.
5 Pray for:
a) Guidance.
b) Wisdom.
6. Dress neatly.
7. Be clean.
8. Always carry something with which to sweeten your breath (breath-mints, etc.).
9. Go in pairs whenever possible.
10. Do not park your automobile behind someone so you will not be forced to move it
at a critical point in the study.
11. Carry a city map and a flashlight in your automobile.
12. If possible, find the address in the daytime. This will enable you to locate it easily
at night.
13. Plan your visits:
a) Go to the best prospect first.
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b) Arrange your list of prospects to where you can make all of your visits in
one area of town before going to another area. This will keep you from
running back and forth across town and losing valuable time.
14. Take some sort of literature with the church’s name on it, that you can leave in
case the prospect is not home. That way the call will not be a total loss.
15. Do not crowd the door.
16. Do NOT get into a Bible discussion at the door:
a) The time at the door is to be spent getting into the house for the study.
b) You will not be able to convert them if you cannot get them to sit down and
open up the Bible with you.
17. Be friendly.
18. Be enthusiastic. Enthusiasm sells!
19. Be courteous.
20. Teach a small number. Do NOT let your prospect talk you into teaching a large
group of people.
21. Your handshake should be:
a) Firm;
b) Not a “bone-crusher”;
c) Gentle with ladies.
Silent Partner
SILENT PARTNER
1. Get the soul-winner and the sinner seated together.
2. Help the sinner locate the passages in the Bible.
3. Nod at the appropriate times.
4. Look interested at all times.
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5. Pray silently.
6. Baby-sit when necessary.
7. Be SILENT:
a) Unless your partner asks for your input.
b) Unless you perceive the clarification of a point MUST be made.
The Approach
THE APPROACH
1. Use the first ten seconds to purchase the time to make the presentation.
2. Develop interest.
3. The question approach:
a) Use a question to develop interest:
1) “Will the majority go to heaven?”
2) “Are we under the Ten Commandments today?”
3) “If you were to die tonight, are you certain you would go to heaven?”
4) “Do you know anything about the church of Christ?”
b) Then use another question to set up the study: (Use #1 below with #1 in
a) above, etc.)
1) “Would you like to see what the Bible says about that?”
2) “Would you like to see what the Bible says about that?”
3) “Would you like to be certain?”
4) “Would you like to know?”
4. Enthusiasm:
a) Enthusiasm sells!
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b) If you are excited about your relationship with Jesus, you can get others
excited about Him.
c) But if you are not excited about Him, you cannot excite others about Him.
d) Enthusiasm is contagious!
5. Do not over-sell:
a) Too much information too fast will turn people off.
b) Give the prospect just enough information to set up the study.
6. The two major things one must remember in the approach are:
a) Develop the interest.
b) Get the appointment.
Approach At The Door
APPROACH AT THE DOOR
1. Be friendly. You are happy and have something wonderful to share.
2. Find something to honestly compliment. For example:
a) House.
b) Lawn.
c) Flowers.
d) Neighborhood.
3. Dialogue:
a) Has anyone been by here with a pamphlet like this?
b) Well I’m glad I came by (said with enthusiasm).
c) Let me tell you what we are doing:
1) First let me tell you what we are NOT doing:
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a. We are not asking for donations;
b. We are not trying to sell our literature.
2) Here is what we are doing:
a. We are rendering a service to our community.
b. We are trying to bring our nation back to God, and I believe
that is what we need. Don’t you? (Wait for answer.)
c. I believe we all need to come back to the Bible and live by
the great principles contained in it, don’t you? (Wait for reply.)
d. Do you study your Bible very much? (Regardless of the
answer, go on.)
e. We are visiting all of the homes in this entire area.
f. We are offering as a FREE service a one hour presentation
of this booklet (The “DOES IT MATTER?”).
1. There are no obligations whatsoever:
2. It is undenominational;
3. We have been sharing it with some of your neighbors
and they really appreciate it and enjoy it.
d) Now, I would like to make it as convenient for you as possible:
1) As we can come in right now, if you would like;
2) Or, if you prefer, we can come back. (State a day and time
convenient for you.)
3) Which would be best for you?
Approach At The Door (2)
APPROACH AT THE DOOR (2)
The following two approaches were developed by John Kimbrough.
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I. John said this approach will get you into almost any door:
“Hello, we are your neighbors. My name is John Kimbrough and this is Bobby Bates.
We thought we would go around this morning and tell our neighbors about some free
public services that are being offered that you probably don’t even know about. May we
come in?”
The free services John told them about were: counseling, Bible classes for all ages,
Bible correspondence course, transportation to and from the services of the church and
a free home Bible study. With this last one, he would try to get them into a Bible study
then and there. He generally would use the “DOES IT MATTER?” and would have
them into a Bible study before they even knew what was going on. However, he did not
recommend this as the BEST approach because he could get a lot of people into a
study who were not in the least interested.
II. This is the approach John recommends to find those who are interested:
“Hello, my name is John Kimbrough and this is Bobby Bates. We are out today telling
our neighbors about some of the free services that are being offered by the Church of
Christ; services such as counseling, Bible classes for all ages, transportation to and
from the church services and Bible correspondence courses. Do you belong to a
church in this area?”
If the person does not belong to church, ask if you can come in and explain.
If he does belong to a church, just go on with the door approach.
“Our main interest is home Bible studies. Do you study the Bible in your own home?”
If he says he does, say, “That’s great. I know, then, that you would enjoy this short Bible
study (showing them the Bible study). May I come in?”
If he hesitates, or refuses, but does not show a REAL negative attitude, continue on.
“Do you mind if I ask you a question?” (Wait for reply.) “If you were to die tonight, do
you know for certain you would go to heaven?”
If the answer is yes, ask him to share it with you, but do not let him do so at the door.
Insist that he let you in so you can sit down and take notes. When he tells you, take
careful notes. After you have patiently, kindly and carefully listened to him, ask if you
could share with him how you came to know for certain you would go to heaven when
you die. At the end of the study, compare his “conversion” with what the Bible teaches.
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If the answer to the above question (“If you were to die tonight, do you know for certain
you would go to heaven?”) is no,’ ask him, “Would you like to know for sure?” If the
answer is yes, say, “May I come in and share with you what God says about that in the
Bible?”
The World Book Shuffle
THE “WORLD BOOK SHUFFLE”
Herb Carnagey is one of the best door to door personal workers I have met. Herb had
been a successful door to door salesman before deciding to give his talents to the work
of the Lord full-time. One successful technique he used is known as “the World Book
Shuffle.”
After going through the door approach and asking for the study, Herb would start wiping
his feet and reach for the door. Often the prospect would just open the door and let him
in.
Herb said that when you ask for the study and start wiping your feet, do not look the
prospect in the eye, but look down as though you are making certain you are wiping
your feet properly. Watch the prospect’s feet. If he starts backing up, you have
permission to enter. If he stands his ground, you will have to do a little more “selling.”
Once Herb and I were working together in a campaign. I went through the door
approach with the lady of the house. There was a little “loud-mouth” dog out in the yard
that stood right behind us and barked the whole time I was talking. When I asked for
the study, Herb started stomping his feet and the lady opened the door to let us in and
Herb pushed me inside. The “stomping” I heard was Herb going through “the World
Book Shuffle.”
The Visit Preliminary To The Study
THE VISIT PRELIMINARY TO THE STUDY
1. Show an interest in them. Be observant of any hobbies, etc., in which they might
be (or have been) engaged.
2. Find something to honestly compliment:
a) Children.
b) Pictures.
c) Flowers.
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d) Furniture.
e) Pottery.
f) House
g) Anything that looks interesting or lovely, etc.
3. Ask questions:
a) Ask questions that require more than a “yes” or “no” answer.
b) Ask questions about job, family, hometown, hobbies, etc.
c) Getting people to talk helps to “warm them up” for the gospel and asking
questions that require some elaboration helps accomplish that.
4. LISTEN!
a) Do not dominate the conversation.
b) People will not be converted because you can out-talk them.
c) People enjoy talking about themselves.
d) People like to think we are interested in them.
e) By listening, the personal worker can learn many things that will help him
as he teaches the lesson and when he comes to the conclusion. For example,
an illustration taken from one’s occupation or hobby can be the key
that open the prospect’s understanding to a vital point.
5. Avoid embarrassing (or potentially embarrassing) questions.
6. Do not acknowledge an apology. Turn the conversation to something positive.
7. Be relaxed and friendly.
8. Make the preliminary visit relatively brief. The purpose is to get the prospect
“warmed up.”
The Study
THE STUDY
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1. Establish a favorable environment. Try to make sure the gospel receives a favorable
hearing:
a) Blaring radio.
b) Favorite television program.
c) Rowdy children.
d) Crying baby.
2. Get around the kitchen table for the study:
a) Visitors sit in the living room, whereas family and close friends sit at the
kitchen table.
b) Most major decisions are made at the kitchen table.
c) The next best place is the dining room table.
d) Due to the fact that you will be writing conclusions and drawing illustrations
for them, you need to get them around a table if at all possible.
3. Place the sinner on your right hand.
4. Have plenty of paper on which to draw illustrations, outline major points and write
down conclusions.
5. Use the sinner’s Bible.
6. Get the sinner to read the passages OUT LOUD.
a) If you have a “silent-partner”, have him alternate with the sinner in reading
the passages.
b) If you have others sifting at the table, have them take turns in reading the
Scriptures.
7. Start the “close” at the beginning of the study:
a) “if we were to find something in our study that God wanted you to do,
would you be willing to do it?”
b “Is there anything that would keep you from doing it tonight (or today as
the case may be)?”
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8. Get on a first name basis as soon as possible. 9. Use the prospect’s name often:
a) It helps to keep their attention.
b) People like to hear their own names.
c) Use his name especially when you want to make an important point.
10. Emphasize areas of agreement.
11. Admit it when you do not know the answer. Just say, “I don’t know but I will find
out.”
12. Postpone when necessary:
a) If it will be covered later, tell them that.
b) If it is not relevant to the study, write it down and tell them you will get to it
another time. Be honest and plan to study it with them, but not until AFTER
you have taught them the gospel.
13. Do not preach. There will be a lot of good lessons one could bring out, but this is
not the time and it will hinder your purpose for being there.
14. Do not try to show off your knowledge of the Bible. People will not be converted
to the Lord because of your knowledge.
15. Do not criticize others (denominations or people). You will not convert anyone by
criticizing their denomination or people associated with their church.
16. Do not get side-tracked.
17. Do not let the study degenerate into a heated argument.
18. Keep it simple. The more complex a situation, the less receptive the sinner will
be to persuasion, because the more complex you make the study the greater the
number of factors the sinner must evaluate before making a decision.
19. Help the sinner see that what you are presenting and proposing is the best, most
reasonable choice.
20. The most powerful tool you can use is the Bible:
a) It was written to convert the lost.
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b) It produces faith.
c) It is the sword of the Holy Spirit.
d) It is the Word of God.
21. The prospect must be made to realize he is a sinner and lost!
22. He must be made aware of the consequences of his lost state.
23. Get everyone in the room involved in the study:
a) Those not involved tend to hinder the study.
b) If there are children in the room who are old enough to read, have them
help read the passages.
24. Involve everyone participating in the study by name.
25. Be excited about the gospel:
a) You have every reason to be excited about the gospel.
b) You can’t get them excited about it if you are not excited about it.
26. Interruptions:
a) If someone in the study has to leave the room for a few moments, hold up
on the study until he returns. You can visit or recap some points.
b) If a visitor comes, invite him to sit in on the study. If he accepts, start the
study anew at the very beginning.
Keeping Their Attention
KEEPING THEIR ATTENTION
The mind works much faster than one can speak; consequently, the mind has a tendency
to wander even when the study is most interesting. Here are some techniques
that will help keep the sinner’s attention during the study:
1. Use his name often.
2. Use lots of illustrations.
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3. Tell stories. Jesus is the Master-teacher: that is what He did.
4. Have him read the passages out loud.
5. Ask questions.
6. Draw stick figures.
7. Write down major conclusions.
8. Be enthusiastic.
9. Change the inflection in your voice. Do not be a monotone.
10. Spaced repetition of important ideas not only keeps his attention, but it is
effective teaching.
11. Use your pen or pencil as a pointer to call attention to a certain passage or word
in a passage that you want to emphasize.
12. Use action:
a) Use hand motions when appropriate.
b) At times it may be effective to act out stories or Biblical examples:
1) Conversion of Saul.
2) Conversion of the Ethiopian.
13. Maintain eye contact.
14. Use facial expressions.
After The Study
AFTER THE STUDY
1. Make notes that will help in a future study with the prospect.
a) Doctrinal difficulties.
b) Names of children, pets, wife.
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c) Hobbies.
d) Favorite topics.
e) Profession.
f) Any difficulties that hinder his obedience to the gospel.
2. Evaluate the study:
a) Were you able to keep on the study?
b) Did you do too much talking?
c) Did you make the study applicable to him?
d) What should you have done differently?
e) What improvements should you make for future studies?
3. Keep in touch:
a) Let him know you are concerned about him as a person.
b) Let him see that your only interest in him is not just to convert him.
The Sale After The Sale
THE SALE AFTER THE SALE
1. It is a natural reaction for one to have second thoughts after making an important
decision:
a) “Did I do the right thing?”
b) “What will (non-Christian friend or relative) think?”
2. Salesmen who are able to keep their product sold, generally give the buyer a
reassurance talk. This can be done a couple of ways:
a) Tell the new convert he has made a wise decision, but Satan will try every
way possible to win him back.
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b) Some personal workers have the new convert write a letter to himself
expressing how he felt at the time of his conversion and why he was baptized.
Prospects
PROSPECTS
I. Always be building relationships with non-Christians:
1. We meet those who are involved in mutual interests:
a) Job.
b) Children.
c) Hobbies.
d) Recreation.
e) Athletics.
2. Develop casual acquaintances.
3. Build relationships with them.
4. Invite them to social activities of the church.
5. Invite them to spiritual activities.
II. Invite them into your home:
1. Mormons have 0.1 conversions for every 1,000 doors knocked, but a 50%
conversion rate of those who come into their homes.
2. The Mormons also find that their best prospects are made by the ordinary
members.
III. With whom were Jesus and the Apostles the most effective in evangelism?
1. Not the:
a) Religious leaders.
b) Philosophers.
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c) Socially elite.
d) Politicians.
e) Wealthy.
2. They were the most effective with the:
a) Common people.
b) Outcasts.
c) Oppressed.
d) Religious minded:
1) Pentecost.
2) Synagogues.
e) Poor.
f) Infirm.
Finding Responsive People
FINDING RESPONSIVE PEOPLE
1. One who has recently undergone a high degree of change in his life.
2. Death of a close friend or loved one.
3. Marital problems.
4. Separation.
5. Divorce.
6. Major illness.
7. Personal tragedy of any kind.
8. New baby (especially the first-born).
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9. New retiree.
10. One who has just moved into the community.
11. Change in job (responsibility, raise, demotion, cut in pay).
12. Change in financial status.
13. Marital reconciliation.
14. Children leaving home.
15. Wife beginning or quitting work.
16. Newly-weds.
17. High school graduates.
18. College graduates.
19. Military personnel.
20. “Undesirables” - They are potential converts to mass movements because they
see their lives as ruined and they are ready for something better.
21. The “new” poor.
22. One who stands alone and has no collective body with which he can blend.
23. Members of a church which was once all-embracing but has relaxed its hold.
24. Members of a movement which is beginning to show liberal tendencies.
25. One who has recently been discharged from the military service.
26. The bored.
27. Non-Christian mates.
28. Non-Christian children.
29. Non-Christian relatives.
30. Non-Christian friends.
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31. Visitors to worship services and/or Bible classes.
32. Parents of “bus children” (if you have a bus program).
33. Rest homes.
34. College campus.
35. Take a religious survey of the community with the explicit purpose of setting up
home Bible studies.
36. Hospital visitation.
37. Campaign for Christ.
38. Those who have completed a Bible correspondence course.
NOTE: Classes #5 - #9 are the 3 booklets, “Back To The Bible”. Please contact
WORLD VIDEO BIBLE SCHOOL for additional copies of the booklets.
Follow-Up On New Converts
FOLLOW-UP ON NEW CONVERTS
One area in which many congregations have been neglected is that of follow-up with
new converts. One acquaintance of mine was an exceptional personal worker who was
able to convert a lot of people, but with no follow-up program, few of them remained
faithful. He lamented the fact that they were “going out the back door as fast as he
brought them in the front door because the brethren did not seem to make an effort to
keep them.”
In Matthew 28:19,20 Jesus said, “Go ye therefore and make disciples of all the nations,
baptizing them in the name of the father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit: teaching
them to observe all thing whatsoever I have commanded you.” Notice, we are to make
disciples and then we are to teach them.
New converts have special needs. I will not go into great detail here about the new
converts follow-up program because I have dealt with it in detail in a work entitled,
Growing In Christ. In the places where Growing In Christ has been implemented it has
proven to be effective. However, I would like to make a few suggestions here that will be
very helpful.
1. WRITE A NOTE:
Have the new convert write a note to himself immediately after his conversion
stating:
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1) Why was he baptized?
2) What did he feel at the time?
3) How faithful will he be to Jesus.
Those who make a written commitment are more likely to remain faithful.
2. INTRODUCE THEM AT THE FIRST SERVICE:
After telling the congregation briefly about the conversion, call the new Christian
by name and have them stand just for a moment so the congregation can see
them.
3. HAVE THEM MEET WITH THE ELDERS:
Arrange for them to meet with the elders at the earliest opportunity so they can
become acquainted with the men who are in charge of their spiritual lives, and so
the elders can explain the work programs of the congregation to them.
4. ADOPTIVE PARENTS:
Match them up with someone in the congregation who will agree to be their spiritual
parents. The adoptive parents must agree to:
1) Contact them each week.
2) Have them over for meals.
3) Pray with them.
4) Remember birthdays, anniversaries, etc.
5) Invite them to sit with them in worship services.
6) Check on them if they miss the church services.
7) Introduce them to other Christians.
5. NEW CONVERTS CLASS:
This is conducted on Sunday mornings at the building during the regular Bible
class hour. The program is explained in my book, Growing In Christ.
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6. JULE MILLER FILMS:
This is conducted in the home and can be done by the one who converted them,
or the Adoptive Parents, or by someone else in the congregation. It is an excellent
tool for reinforcing what they have already learned and helping to establish
them in the faith.
If one family member was converted, but the others were not, this provides a
good opportunity to do some more teaching and try to lead the unconverted family
members to obey the gospel.
Jule originally produced these on film strips, but now they are available on video
tapes. Since most people have VCRs, it is an excellent way to show them and
one would not have to mess with a projector, screen, electrical extension cord,
etc., etc.
7. VISITATION:
Give their names to the leaders of the visitation program to visit once a week for
a couple of months.
8. INVOLVEMENT:
Get them involved as soon as possible. Here are some suggestions (to be applied
where appropriate):
1) Serving at the Lord’s table.
2) Preparing food for:
a. Sick.
b. Teen parties.
c. Fellowships.
3) Sit with the sick.
4) Get them on a visitation team.
5) Take them on Bible studies with you.
6) Get them to help with work around the church building.
9. INTRODUCE THEM TO INDIVIDUAL MEMBERS OF THE CONGREGATION:
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Statistics show that if the new converts do not make four or five friends in the
congregation, they will fall away. So it is very important to help them make
friends.
This can be accomplished in a number of ways.
1) Invite the new converts over to your house for a meal and have another
couple there from the congregation whom you feel will be compatible with
them.
2) Invite them over for refreshments and have a number of other couples
over at the same time.
3) Invite them and some other couples to out for coffee after the Wednesday
evening services.
10. NEW CONTACTS:
Each person has his own unique circle of friends and relations. Consequently,
the new convert can use his influence to lead us to souls we would never be able
to contact otherwise. As we nurture him in the faith, we need to help him realize
the urgent need to help us carry the gospel to his friends and relatives.
11. PERSONAL EVANGELISM:
As soon as possible enroll him in a personal evangelism class and take him with
you on Bible studies. The best way to ground a person in the faith is to have him
learn how to teach it.
Objections To Baptism
OBJECTIONS TO BAPTISM
Following are twenty-five of the most common objections to the essentiality of baptism.
Answer these objection with Scripture and logic.
1. The thief on the cross was saved without baptism.
2. We are saved by grace through faith, Ephesians 2:8.
3. What if one is in the desert and cannot get to water?
4. It condemns all who have not been baptized regardless of their sincerity.
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5. Baptism is a work of man and we are not saved by works, Romans 4:1-5; Ephesians
2:8.
6. Baptism is only a figure, 1 Peter 3:21. It is only a figure of our salvation, signifying
we have been saved.
7. In Mark 16:16, Jesus does NOT say, “He that believeth not and is baptized not
shall be condemned.” Only the unbelievers are condemned.
8. In 1 John 5:1, John says, “Whosoever believeth that Jesus is the Christ is born of
God.” Therefore, one is born of God at faith without baptism.
9. In Acts 2:38, the word “for” means “because of.” Therefore, one is baptized
BECAUSE his sins were forgiven when he believed.
10. In 1 Corinthians 1: 17, Paul said, “Christ sent me not to baptize, but to preach the
gospel.” Since Paul was not sent to baptize, baptism is not essential to salvation.
11. 1 Corinthians 10:2. To be baptized into Christ (eis Christon ebaptisthetej
corresponds identically with the statement, “baptized unto Moses” (eis ton Mosen
ebaptisanto). Israel was not literally baptized into Moses. They were simply
identified with Moses through the baptism in the Red Sea. All were delivered
from the bondage of Pharaoh by the blood before they were baptized into Moses.
In like manner, one must be a child of God by faith in Christ Jesus before he is a
fit subject to be baptized into Christ.
12. John 4:1. Jesus made and baptized more disciples than John. Jesus FIRST
made disciples and then He baptized them. Therefore they were saved BEFORE
being baptized.
13. John 3:5. To be born of water and Spirit is to be born physically and spiritually.
“Water” here refers to physical birth and “Spirit” refers to spiritual birth. Baptism is
not discussed here at all.
14. John 3:5. “Water” and “Spirit” are the same here. Kai can be translated “even.”
Jesus is saying, “Except one is born of the water, EVEN the Spirit.”
15. John 3:5. If “water” refers to water baptism, then there are two baptisms taught
in this passage. Ephesians 4:5 teaches there is but one baptism. Therefore, “
water” in this passage cannot refer to baptism.
16. John 1:31. Baptism is to make manifest. The purpose of baptism is: that the
Christian makes manifest to the world his identity with Jesus and the church. It is
the public declaration that he is saved. Jesus was baptized to make known to
the world that He is the Son of God. Likewise, we are baptized to manifest to the
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world that we are the children of God. Jesus was not baptized to become the
Son of God and neither are we.
17. John 3:5. To be born of water and Spirit has no reference to baptism because
baptism is a burial, not a birth.
18. Acts 10:44. Cornelius received the Holy Spirit before baptism. In John 14:17
Jesus said the world cannot receive the Holy Spirit. Thus, Cornelius was a Christian
before he was baptized.
19. John 3:5. To be born of water in this passage cannot refer to Christian baptism
because it had not yet been instituted.
20. John 3:5. The word “water” in connection with salvation is often used as a
symbol of the Holy Spirit. In John 7:37,38, Jesus said, “He that believeth on me
as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of water. But this he
spake of the Spirit.” Jesus used “water” first as a figurative way of saying “born
of the Spirit,” and then made Himself clear by repeating the thought in plain language.
21. Acts 22:16. Ananias tells Paul to “be baptized and wash away thy sins” - two
separate acts. Paul was not told to be baptized in order to wash away his sins,
but he was told to wash away his sins by calling on the name of the Lord.
22. Acts 22:16. In Galatians 1:11,12, Paul said that the gospel he preached was not
taught to him by man, but it came to him by revelation of Jesus. If baptisms were
a part of Paul’s gospel, then Paul received it from man - Ananias.
23. Romans 6:3,4. Throughout the first part of this chapter, Paul is speaking in
figures and symbols. Paul is using baptism as a symbol to paint a vivid picture of
what happens when one is identified with Christ. Baptism pictures the burial and
resurrection, but is not itself that burial and resurrection.
24. Galatians 3:27. Baptism here does not refer to water baptism, but is figurative
for our identification with Christ, which is achieved by faith.
25. 1st Peter 3:21. Water baptism IS a “putting away of the filth of the flesh.” What
actually saves is the “answering of a good consc

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REASONS SO MANY CHRISTIANS LEAVE THE CHURCH
1. Marriage to a non-Christian spouse - or to an alienated Christian spouse. This is
also the source for converts to Christ, but it must be pursued. Approximately
25% of all who leave the church do so because of marriage to non-Christian
mates.
2. Mobility - Christians moving to a new location and failing to identify with a local
congregation. 20% of the American people every 12 months. If contact is not
made with the church within the first 6 months after arrival, the Christian is almost
certain to drop out.
3. A personal or family quarrel - with a church, a brother or sister, a minister, a
physical act of abuse, a real or fancied insult, or an act of rejection by a religious
leader.
4. Deterioration of Christian family life - the family’s increasing inability in the face of
secular value systems to pass on to the children the Christian way of life and
practices.
5. Diminishing loyalty to a specific congregation - shopping around for compatible
personalities and worship styles results in a less personal commitment in and
with each move.
6. Crisis of authority and its consequent confusion - caused by liberal theology and
a lack of understanding of God’s Word.
7. Impersonalism - created by congregations who have no small group interaction
opportunities for Bible study and greater fellowship.
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Steps Toward Church Growth
Name:
STEPS TOWARD CHURCH GROWTH
I. STEP ONE: CONDUCT A CHURCH GROWTH SURVEY.
A. Gain the approval of the elders/leaders and have them appoint a
committee to accomplish this.
B. Train the Survey Committee by showing them what is to be accomplished
with each chapter of the survey:
1. Chapter 1 “Geography and History of the Region.”
2. Chapter 2 “The People Living in the Region.”
3. Chapter 3 “Growth of the Local Church.”
4. Chapter 4 “Analysis of the Membership.”
5. Chapter 5 “Evaluation of and Recommendations for the Work of the
Local Church.”
6. Chapter 6 “Goals and Objectives for Increased Growth.”
7. Chapter 7 “Conclusions.”
C. Appoint various Survey Committee members to gather the data for each of
the first three chapters (only). Probably a minimum of three and a
maximum of five people should serve on each chapter. Then have two
people serve as editors of the entire work; they will determine the format
and edit each chapter to provide continuity of style.
D. Write a Church Growth Survey.
1. Write an Introduction to the Survey.
Define the study. State the purpose and scope of the study.
Determine the area and religious bodies to be covered.
2. From local sources, give a brief history of the area, how it started,
how it grew, statistics on its present size, and any unusual growth
-2-
or decline and its cause (large company moved in, or mine shut
down, etc.). This will be Chapter 1.
3. From demographic companies, the Chamber of Commerce, etc.
determine the people or peoples (i.e. different groups if desired) to
be covered and their characteristics. This will be Chapter 2. See
“Currents.”
4. Compile the Necessary Growth Statistics of the Local Church. This
will be Chapter 3.
a. Membership totals - for each year for a least ten years.
b. Attendance totals - gather them for all services and classes
for ten years.
c. Annual gains and losses in membership. Plot on both bar
and pie graphs.
Types of Growth: Types of Decreases:
1) Biological. 1) Deaths.
2) Transfer. 2) Transfers out.
3) Conversion. 3) Reversions to the
World.
d. Contribution totals and distribution - building costs and
upkeep, outreach, supplies, etc.
e. Units within the congregation:
1) Racial mixture.
2) Age groups.
3) Division by sex.
4) Geographical analysis of membership. . . . . . . Plot
on a map of the area.
5) Socio-economic groups.
-3-
6) Special groups within the congregation. . . . . . . Plot
on pie graphs.
(Use pie graphs when working percentages because
they are part of a whole.)
f. Communicants . . . . . . . Plot on pie graphs.
1) Non-Christian children of Christian parents.
2) Spouses favorable to the church.
3) Bus children or other children attending Bible classes,
VBS, etc.
4) Relatives of members who live nearby.
5) Active prospects, etc.
g. Family Analysis. . . . . . . . . Plot on pie graphs.
1) Full Families.
2) Half Families.
3) Singles (both old and young).
h. Three-Circle Analysis of Membership. . . . . . . . . Plot on pie
and line graphs.
1) Hard-core.
2) Mainstream.
3) Outer-fringe.
i. [If this is for a study beyond the local congregational level
you will need the following:
1) Field totals (i.e. of all other statistics you are
comparing).
2) Membership totals of each homogenous unit (i.e. of
similar statistical groups).
-4-
3) Individual local church totals.
4. Write This Study in a Readable Form. This will be Chapter 3.
ll. STEP TWO: CONDUCT AN ANALYSIS OF THE CHURCH’S MEMBERSHIP.
A. Determine what you wish to measure with your analysis and then
construct your questionnaire. [See sample(s).]
B. Set up the procedures for tabulating the information.
C. Have the elders determine what Sunday morning you will administer the
questionnaire. Have them take a leading role in explaining the importance
of gaining more information about the congregation so they may do a
better job of shepherding the flock.
D. Administer the questionnaire in connection with the Sunday morning
services. Otherwise you will not get the needed information since other
services are usually appreciably less attended and therefore would not
include input from all who come to the morning service.
E. Compile the pertinent information from the questionnaires, construct the
necessary graphs. This will be Chapter 4.
III. STEP THREE: EVALUATE EVERY ASPECT OF THE WORK OF THE
CHURCH.
A. Have the elders select some of the men from the Church Growth Survey
Committee to interview committee chairmen, every deacon and elder
involved in leadership roles in the local church, (if no elders and deacons,
other leaders), for example, those heading up the youth work, education
program, personal evangelism, visitation committee, etc.
B. Then, for each area describe the current program. Take one program at a
time. Have the committee write up recommendations for possible
improvement based on the results of chapters 3 and 4. They may need to
consult an organization chart to make certain that they get a clear picture
of each area of work.
C. Compile all of these evaluations and recommendations. Write an
introduction and a conclusion to this study. This will be Chapter 5.
-5-
IV. STEP FOUR: PROJECT THE GOALS AND OBJECTIVES OF THE LOCAL
CHURCH.
A. Share the results of the survey thus far with the elders and get their input
in setting goals for the church.
B. Get the elders to share this survey with the members and get them to
participate in the goal-setting stage.
C. Consider the graphs showing past growth (or lack of it) and make faith
projections as to what can be done in every area of work in the future.
D. Bathe the matter in prayer and fasting during a two-week period. Then
present it to the entire congregation in a positive, optimistic way.
E. This will be Chapter 6.
V. STEP FIVE: WRITE YOUR CONCLUSIONS.
A. Write your conclusions to the church growth study.
B. This will be Chapter 7.
VI. STEP SIX: PREPARE A WORK PLAN.
A. Write out your goals and priorities for the church in detail.
B. Prepare a 5-year strategy with a PERT Chart for the work.
C. Secure, train and put to work the personnel to carry out the plans.
D. Give God the glory for any growth or success.
-1-
Ministry Analysis Questionnaire
Ministry Analysis Questionnaire
Service
Giving time and talents to Christ through using time and talents to benefit others
1. There is an ongoing effort to identify and provide meaningful roles and tasks for YES NO
persons involved in our ministry or program area. ☐ ☐
2. We provide training for our members prior to their assuming a role or task. ☐ ☐
3. Our ministry area helps members identify and use their spiritual gifts appropriately. ☐ ☐
4. We provide appropriate roles and tasks for friends or relatives of members, and
seek to invite and involve these people. ☐ ☐
5. Our group or ministry has a procedure for identifying persons who are in need in
the church or community, and providing appropriate assistance. ☐ ☐
6. At least once a year our ministry area sponsors a service project in which a large
number of persons from the church participate. ☐ ☐
Outreach & Assimilation
Reaching out to, and involving newcomers in the life and ministry of the church
1. At least once each quarter our ministry area sponsors an event specifically planned YES NO
and promoted to reach out to unchurched persons in our community. ☐ ☐
2. We have had an evangelism training course specifically for the people in our
ministry area during the past year. ☐ ☐
3. Specific prayer for unchurched friends, neighbors, and relatives is part of our
regular meetings. ☐ ☐
4. Our ministry has a purpose statement which includes outreach to unchurched
people. ☐ ☐
5. Our ministry has an active and effective procedure for identifying prospective new
members. ☐ ☐
6. There is a person(s) specifically responsible for greeting visitors and newcomers,
introducing them to others, and making them feel welcome at all functions. ☐ ☐
7. Our group or ministry has a method for obtaining the names of potentially interested
church members, and contacting them about our programs. ☐ ☐
8. Our group sets yearly membership and attendance goals. ☐ ☐
9. We have started at least one new group in this ministry or program area within the
past two years. ☐ ☐
©1993 Charles Arn, Church Growth Inc.
P.O. Box 541, Monrovia, CA 91016 • 1-800-423-4844
Published in Ministry Advantage -The Growth Report, May/June 1993.
Permission is granted to reproduce this questionnaire for local church use.
Instructions
1. Complete this analysis for each ministry or program area in your church.
2. Check YES or NO after each statement, based on the most accurate assessment of that ministry.
3. Total the YES items checked in each of the four areas below. On the “Scoring Guide” circle the
number on each continuum which represents the number of YES items checked.
-2-
Christian Formation
Enabling men and women to grow toward Christ likeness
1. We have at least one Bible study or small group meeting each month for every YES NO
25 members, other than what is available through Sunday School. ☐ ☐
2. Our group or ministry area plans specific learning experiences to help members
apply their Christian faith to real-world issues. ☐ ☐
3. Every activity we sponsor has a component to help members develop in their
Christian life. ☐ ☐
4. Our members are learning about prayer, and are encouraged to grow in their personal
and group prayer life. ☐ ☐
5. We have a plan in which each group member is individually prayed for each
month. ☐ ☐
6. Members of our group or ministry are encouraged to attend our worship service
regularly, and attendance records are reviewed by group leaders. ☐ ☐
7. Our church provides resources (print, audio, video) related to spiritual growth,
which our group members know about and use. ☐ ☐
8. We sponsor at least one missions experience each year for our members. ☐ ☐
Fellowship
Building close friendships and relationships among members YES NO
1. We have at least one social event each quarter for the persons in our ministry area. ☐ ☐
2. We have an intentional strategy to help members build stronger relationships with
each other. ☐ ☐
3. At least once a month every member receives a contact from the church or representative
in our ministry area. ☐ ☐
4. We have a way to identify members with a special need, and a way for members
to respond and get involved. ☐ ☐
5. We encourage our members to spend time together informally outside the regular
meetings. ☐ ☐
6. Our group keeps records to recognize and celebrate special occasions in members’
lives (i.e. birthdays, anniversaries, promotions, new children or grandchildren,
honors, etc.). ☐ ☐
7. We have a method or program designed to build and strengthen relationships with
newcomers in our group or ministry. ☐ ☐
Ministry Area Effectiveness Scale - SCORING GUIDE
Circle the number of statements in the YES column for each of the four ministry areas.
Service:
Very Effective Ineffective
6 5 4 3 2 1
Outreach/Assimilation:
Very Effective Ineffective
9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Christian Formation:
Very Effective Ineffective
8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Fellowship:
Very Effective Ineffective
7 6 5 4 3 2 1
If the number you circled is on the right side of any of these four scales, determine to move the NO items to YES in the coming year.
and identify specific activities to do so. The result will be an increase in the enthusiasm of your members, the effectiveness in your
ministry, and number of unchurched people you reach for Christ and His church.
-1-
Using Others’ ProgramsU
sing Others’ Programs
Here are a few reasons why borrowed programs that work well in one
congregation may not work well in another one.
1. The real philosophy, mechanics, and nature of the program may
not be completely understood. Some move too quickly in
adopting new programs.
2. In some cases the leadership is not prepared to properly handle
the program. This is vital in borrowing programs.
3. Members do not fully understand the program or their role in it,
thus, they are not sold on it. Proper communication must ensure
that everyone has been informed.
4. Your context (i.e. socio-economical conditions) may not be the
same as the church your are borrowing from. A big city program
may not work in a rural community.
5. The Biblical basis for the program may be questionable. Just
because someone else is successfully doing it does not
guarantee it is Scriptural.
6. Proper education and preparation has not been completed.
7. The congregation does not have the right talent-mix to
implement and maintain the program.
8. It may merely be a fad that has died and is being resurrected by
an uninformed novice.
-2-
9. The program may not be working as well as you think. Zeal and
the quest for new programs can blind us to some key factors,
such as results.
10. The program may serve only to inflate the adapter’s ego and
have no real sustenance for the church’s future or its growth.
11. Your congregation may not be spiritually, financially or
numerically able to handle the new program.
12. The same degree or amount of faith required for the program’s
success is not available in your congregation.
There may be a deeper reason why borrowed programs have such a
hard time in being adapted. As we search for programs, we are, as a
general rule, starting in the wrong place. We are looking without
instead of within.
The beginning of church growth is within the heart of each member.
The truth is exemplified in the Parable of the Sower in Luke 8:15. The
Master church builder said, “These are the ones who have heard the
word in an honest and good heart, and hold it fast and bear fruit with
perseverance.”
-1-
Church Of Christ Questionnaire
CHURCH OF CHRIST QUESTIONNAIRE
1. How often do you attend Sunday school?
regularly sometimes never
usually seldom
2. My impression of Sunday school is that it is:
well organized and growing.
losing its effectiveness.
generally good.
poor.
3. More people would attend our Sunday school if:
we had better teachers.
the classes were smaller.
we had greater variation in our curriculum.
the classes were more relevant to everyday living.
the biblical content was stronger.
4. How often do you attend Sunday morning worship?
regularly sometimes never
usually seldom
5. Worship would be more inspiring if:
more attention was given to the Lord’s Supper.
there was more variation in the songs we sing.
the service was shorter.
the service was longer.
Other:
6. The pulpit ministry of our preacher is:
meaningful and meets my needs.
unrelated to the problems we face today.
too long.
Comments:
7. I believe our pulpit minister is fulfilling his responsibilities according to the
following scale:
excellent fair
good poor
Comments:
2
8. In my observation I believe our pulpit minister needs improvement in:
preaching.
working with people.
visitation.
organization and administration.
Other:
9. How often do you attend Sunday evening worship?
regularly sometimes never
usually seldom
10. I would attend Sunday evening worship with greater regularity if:
there was more diversity to our program.
it was more relevant to everyday life.
it were not so boring.
Other:
11. How often do you attend Wednesday evening Bible study?
regularly sometimes never
usually seldom
12. My attendance on Wednesday evening would be more regular if:
the teachers were better prepared.
the meeting time was changed.
the classes were smaller.
the class topics were relevant to everyday life.
Other:
13. The youth program of our church is:
meeting the needs of our junior high and senior high young people.
a vital part of our church.
not attractive to our young people.
not effective.
Comments:
14. Our youth program needs more:
interested people of the church to work in it.
activities.
opportunities for our young people to serve the Lord.
spiritual depth.
-3-
Other:
15. I believe our outreach program needs to be improved in the following ways:
develop an effective soul winning program.
invite a speaker for a church growth seminar.
follow up on visitors to our services.
do direct mailing.
find prospects through a religious survey.
subscribe for a bundle of Church Growth magazine.
16. On a scale of 1 through 10 (1=poor, 10=excellent), how would you rate our elders
individually?
(name of elder)
(name of elder)
(name of elder)
Comments:
17. How could the elders more effectively serve you?
by greater availability to counsel.
by more personal involvement with the congregation.
by more visitation.
Comments:
18. In my opinion the greatest strength of (name of church) is:
19. In my opinion the greatest weakness of (name of church) is:
20. I contribute to (name of church)
regularly sometimes never
:
usually seldom
4
21. I would give more generously to (name of church)
we were involved in more missionary work.
if:
I knew how the funds were being spent.
I had more input into how the funds were being spent.
I knew more about the works we support.
Comments:
22. I give to other Christian organizations, programs, missionaries, etc., besides
(name of church)
yes no
.
23. How many times in the past year has someone, other than a family member,
visited (name of church)
once three times never
as a result of your invitation?
twice four or more times
24. Would you consider (name of church)
yes no moderately
a “friendly” church?
25. How can we improve to become a friendlier church?
include a time for greeting each other in the assembly.
have more social functions.
Other:
Optional
I am: male female
I am: single married widowed divorced
How long have you been a member at (name of church)
less than 1 year 4-10 years 15 or more years
?
1-3 years 11-15 years
How far do you live from the church building?
less than 1 mile 4-10 miles
1-3 miles more than 10 miles
-1-
Congregational Survey
CONGREGATIONAL SURVEY
I. PERSONAL INFORMATION: To be completed by each individual member of the
Lord’s body.
A. Circle the number to the left of the answer that best communicates your
answer to each question or sentence completion. Note: If more space is
needed for a response making a suggestion, please continue your
suggestion on the back of the last sheet beginning with the number of the
item.
Q1. I am: Q2. My age is:
1 ... a male 01 ... 12 years or under
2 ... a female 02 ... 12 to 18 years
03 ... 19 to 25 years
04 ... 26 to 30 years
05 ... 31 to 40 years
06 ... 41 to 50 years
07 ... 51 to 60 years
08 ... 61 to 70 years
09 ... 71 or more years
Q3. I am: (family status)
1 ... single (never married)
2 ... married
3 ... married and a parent
4 ... a widow
5 ... a widower
6 ... a single parent
7 ... divorced
8 ... divorced and remarried
9 ... single college student living away from home during school
Q4. I became a member of the body of Christ by being baptized for the forgiveness of
my sins:
1 ... during the past year
2 ... 1-2 years ago
3 ... 3-5 years ago
4 ... 6-10 years ago
5 ... 11 or more years ago
6 ... I have never been baptized
-2-
Q5. I moved to this area and identified with this congregation:
1 ... during the past year
2 ... 1-2 years ago
3 ... 3-5 years ago
4 ... 6-10 years ago
5 ... 11 or more ago
Q6. I have been a member of this congregation:
1 ... 0 to 1 year
2 ... 2 to 4 years
3 ... 5 to 7 years
4 ... 8 to 10 years
5 ... 11 to 15 years
6 ... 16 or more years
Q7. Circle the number to the left of the answer that best describes your condition
when you became a member of this congregation.
1 ... I was converted to Christ at this location but my parents were not members
of the Lord’s body.
2 ... I was converted to Christ at this location and my parents were members of
the Lord’s body.
3 ... I placed membership here from another local Lord’s body.
4 ... I moved here from another city and identified with this Lord’s body.
Q8. The ministry of the church that had the most influence toward my conversion
(becoming a member of the Lord’s church) was:
1 ... influence of friends
2 ... influence of relatives
3 ... the Bible classes
4 ... the preaching
5 ... personal evangelism
6 ... the friendliness of members
7 ... visiting during a special event
Q9 I try to study the Bible at home:
1 ... daily
2 ... two or three times a week
3 ... at least once a week
4 ... hardly ever
-3-
Q10 I spend about the following number of minutes, per day, developing a personal
relationship with God through prayer and study:
1 ... 5 to 10 minutes
2 ... 10 to 30 minutes
3 ... 30 to 60 minutes
4 ... none
Q11 My formal education level is:
1 ... less than 9 years
2 ... 9 - 12 years
3 ... 13 - 16 years
4 ... more than 16 years
II. PERSONAL EVALUATION OF THE CHURCH AND ITS WORK: (Circle the
answer or the number on the scale that most closely represents your evaluation
of the following: I = low in value and 7 = high.)
A. BIBLE CLASSES:
Q12. The length of our Bible class periods are:
1 ... too long
2 ... about right
3 ... too short
Q13. The times of our Bible class periods are:
1 ... good (9:00 am Sunday, 7:30 pm Wednesday)
2 ... not good
3 ... May I suggest:
Q14. The curriculum for our Adult Bible classes is:
1 ... equipping me for my needed spiritual growth
2 ... providing the opportunity to obtain good Bible knowledge
3 ... in need of improvement
4 ... May I suggest:
Q15. I believe the teachers of my Adult classes are:
1 ... doing a good job
2 ... are not adequate and should be replaced
-4-
3 ... May I suggest:
Q16. I believe that the church’s Bible class curriculum for the Cradle Roll through
Teens is:
1- - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Not meeting needs Very Effective
May I suggest:
Note 1: Please list some specific Bible class topics which you believe would help equip
you for spiritual growth:
4
Q17. I believe that the teachers participating in the church’s Bible classes for the
Cradle Roll through Teens are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Not adequate Doing an excellent job
May I suggest:
Q18. I believe that our provisions for New Christians to be integrated into our Bible
classes and providing Christian classes is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Not adequate Doing an excellent job
May I suggest:
B. WORSHIP ASSEMBLIES:
Q19. I believe that the length of our worship assemblies are:
1 ... too long
2 ... about right
3 ... too short
4 ... May I suggest:
Q20. I believe that the times of our worship assemblies are:
1 ... good
2 ... not good
3 ... May I suggest:
-5-
Q21. The balance of time used for praying, singing, teaching, giving, and partaking of
the Lord’s supper is:
1 ... about right
2 ... needs improvement
3 ... May I suggest:
Q22. I believe that the song leading and singing in our public assemblies:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Needs improvement Is excellent
May I suggest:
Q23. I believe that our conduct of the Lord’s Supper is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Needs improvement Is conducted in a worthy manner
May I suggest:
Q24. I believe that the sermons being presented at our assemblies are:
1 ... providing sound messages for the equipping us for spiritual growth
2 ... edifying
3 ... encouraging
4 ... motivational
5 ... good for our non-member visitors
6 ... could be improved
7 ... May I suggest:
Q25. I think that our assemblies for public worship are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Discouraging Extremely uplifting
May I suggest:
Q26. I believe that a children’s Bible hour for ages 2-5 on Sunday mornings during the
sermon only is:
1 ... needed
2 ... not necessary
3 ... needed and I would participate in such a ministry
4 ... needed and I would serve in support of such a ministry
-6-
Q27. I think that our evangelistic ministry toward the community is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Dead Active and working
May I suggest:
Q28. I think that our efforts in non-local (USA) missionary work are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Ineffective Very effective
May I suggest:
Q29. I think that our efforts in the foreign missionary work are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Ineffective Very effective
May I suggest:
Q30. I believe that our missionary works:
1 ... are good and necessary works for the Lord
2 ... have a good influence upon the congregation
3 ... need to be promoted more by keeping the congregation better informed
4 ... receive too much unnecessary attention
May I suggest:
Q31. I believe that our ministry of training preachers, missionaries, leaders, personal
workers, and song leaders is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Not worth the Very worthwhile
cost and efforts
May I suggest:
Q32. I believe that the staff assembled to conduct our work of the church is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Poor Excellent
-7-
May I suggest:
Q33. I think that the potential for personal and numerical growth, considering our
present location, membership, and staff is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Poor Excellent
May I suggest:
Q34. I believe that our spiritual leaders (shepherds), in their conduct of the oversight of
the church, are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Doing a poor job Doing an excellent job
May I suggest:
Q35. I believe that our spiritual leaders (elders) in their conduct of the shepherding of
the flock are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Not concerned Very concerned
May I suggest:
Q36. I believe that our spiritual leaders (elders) in their contacts with the members:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Are lacking Doing a good job
May I suggest:
Q37. I believe that the utilization of our elders in their teaching roles:
1 ... needs to be increased
2 ... is well balanced
3 ... are being used too much well
May I suggest:
-8-
Q38. I believe that our Christian (social) activities outside our worship assemblies e.g.
High School Banquets, Showers, Bible class and special group activities are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Are lacking Excellent
May I suggest:
Note 2: I would be willing to serve on a task force to generate ideas for reaching
our community with the Gospel.
Yes No
C. ADMINISTRATION, COMMUNICATIONS AND PUBLICATIONS
Q39. Concerning our involvement ministries and work programs. I believe we are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Lacking Doing an excellent job
May I suggest:
Q40. Concerning our involvement ministries and work programs, I believe we:
1 . . . need more emphasis on:
2 . . . need less emphasis on:
May I suggest:
Q41. Our deacons and/or work team directors are:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Not performing Performing well
Q42. Our deacons and/or work team directors are being delegated:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Too little authority The right authority
to function to function
May I suggest:
-9-
Q43. I believe that the use of our proposed and budgeted church funds:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Needs improvement Is conducted in a worthy manner
May I suggest:
Q44. I believe our use of our bulletin boards as teaching and motivational tools:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Needs improving Is excellent
May I suggest:
Q45. Concerning our public attempts to communicate information to the congregation
at the beginning of public worship assemblies. I believe these announcements
are:
1 ... aided by the use of the Overhead Projection on the screen
2 ... necessary and needed to keep the congregation informed
3 ... too long
4 ... are impersonal
5 ... are awkward
May I suggest:
Q46. I believe that our church bulletin:
1 ... is informative and easy to read
2 ... contains good teaching articles
3 ... is a good information vehicle to keep the brotherhood informed about the
work at this location.
4 ... Needs to be improved and/or revised
May I suggest:
III. PERSONAL EVALUATION OF My INVOLVEMENT WITH THE CHURCH AND
THE WORK OF THE CHURCH. (Circle the number on the scale that most
closely represents your personal evaluation of the following:)
-10-
Q47. I normally try to assemble with the church for Bible classes: (Circle all that are
applicable.)
1 ... Sunday morning classes
2 ... Wednesday evening classes
3 ... I do not attend because:
Q48. I normally try to assemble with the church for the worship assemblies: (Circle all
that are applicable.)
1 ... Sunday morning classes
2 ... Sunday evening
... I normally sit in the auditorium:
3 ... near the front
4 ... in the middle
5 ... near the rear
... I am distracted during worship:
6 ... occasionally, because:
7 ... often, because:
Q49. Concerning my financial contribution to the work of the Lord’s body here: (Circle
all that are applicable.)
1 ... I cooperate with the church’s planning routine by providing the elders with
my purposed plan for giving.
2 ... After purposing, I give weekly as the Lord has prospered me.
3 ... I normally give only when I am in attendance.
Note 3: What suggestions would you have to strengthen our bonding to Christ and to
one another and be more responsive to serving one another?
Q50. When I try to relate to the “church family” I am in the:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Outer limits Inner circle
May I suggest:
-11-
Q51. I find most of the activities of our congregation to be:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Burdensome Very enjoyable
May I suggest:
Q52. I purposefully give to support the Lord’s work financially:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Seldom Regularly
Q53. When it comes to sharing my faith with others:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
I am a failure I look forward to opportunities
May I suggest:
Q54. My Christian life, from my own perception is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Very shaky Very solid
Q55. My Christian life because of the ministries of our congregation is:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Struggling Soaring
May I suggest:
Q56. If given the opportunity to train for some type of an outreach or teaching ministry
through the church I would:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
Choose not to Choose to get
get involved involved
Q57. When it comes to understanding my talents and using them for the glory of Christ
and His church:
1 - - - 2 - - - 3 - - - 4 - - - 5 - - - 6 - - - 7
I do not know what to do I am confident that I am using them
May I suggest:
-12-
NOTE: If you have a suggestion or comment that you think would aid us as a
congregation in this evaluation of ourselves as a part of the Lord’s body, please include
it in the space below:
1
Flowchart
2
Church Growth Reading List
CHURCH GROWTH READING LIST
Anderson, Andy. Effective Methods of Church Growth. Nashville Broadman Press,
1985.
Arn, Charles, Donald McGavran, and Win Arn. Growth: A New Vision for the Sunday
School. Pasadena: Church Growth Press, 1980. 150 pgs. The first book to make
explicit application of church growth principles to the growth of the Sunday School.
Arn, Win. The Church Growth Ratio Book.
_____ , ed. The Pastor’s Church Growth Handbook. Pasadena: Church Growth Press,
1979. 220 pgs. A very interesting compilation of articles that have appeared in Church
Growth: America magazine over the last few years.
_____ . ed. The Pastor’s Church Growth Handbook. Vol II. Pasadena: Church Growth
Press, 1982. 191 pgs. More of the above. An excellent and practical source.
Arn, Win and Charles Arn. The Master’s Plan for Making Disciples. Pasadena: Church
Growth Press, 1982. 176 pgs. One of the key concepts of church growth theory is to
identify people movements that travel along lines of natural webs of relationships. The
Arns call this “oikos” evangelism and develop the principle in detail in this excellent
book.
Arn, Win & Nijquist, Carroll, Who Cares About Love. Church Growth, 2670 S. Myrtle
Ave., Monrovia, CA 91016.
Arn, Win. Live Long and Love It. Church Growth Institute, Arcadia, CA 91006.
_____The Church Growth Ratio Book. Church growth, Inc., Monrovia, CA 91016.
Baker, Brown, and Dale. Reviving the Plateaued Church.
_____Sunday School Board. SBC, 127 9th Ave, Nashville, TN 37234.
Barna, George. Church Growth: Practical Steps That Work. The Barna Research
Group, 1989.
Barna George. Marketing The Church. Nav. Press, Colorado Springs, CO 1973.
(262.1.)
Bast, Bob. Attracting New Members. Church Growth, Inc., Monrovia, CA.
Bast, Robert. The Missing Generation. Church Growth Inc., Monrovia, CA.
3
Buttry, Daniel. Bringing Your church Back to Life. Judson Press, Valley Forge.
Carl, George and Robert Logan. Leasing and Managing your Church. Old Tappan:
Fleming H. Revell Company, 1979.
Clark, Stephen. Building Christian Communities: Strategy for Renewing the Church. Ave
Maria Press, Notre Dame, IN 46446, 1972.
Dale, Robert. Keeping the Dream Alive. Broadman, Nashville 1981.
Dale, Robert. To Dream Again. Broadman, Nashville, 1981.
Davenport, D. Dewayne. The Bible Says Grow: Church Growth Guidelines for the
Church of Christ. Church Growth/Evangelism Seminar, Box 314, Williamstown, WV
26187, 1978. Donald McGavran writes the introduction to this fine summary of church
growth principles contextualized for the Restoration Movement Churches. (Xn)
Easum, William. The Church Growth Handbook. Nashville: Abingdon Press 1990.
Galloway, Dale. 20 20 Vision: How to Create a Successful Church. Portland: Scott
Publishing Company,1990.
Gibbs, Eddie. Body Building Exercises for the Local Church. London: Falcon, 1979. 80
pgs. A creative application and adaptation of Wagner’s church pathology to churches in
England. This book models how church growth principles can be contextualized.
_____. I Believe in Church Growth. Eerdmans. 1982. This is the most complete
introductory textbook on church growth available. Gibbs, who has a D.Min. in church
growth from Fuller, writes from a British perspective, but his insights are universal.
Goldtrap, George. The Madison Story. Nashville: Gospel Advocate Company, 1987.
Hadaway, C. Kirk. Church Growth Principles. Broadman, Nashville.
Harre, Allan F. Close The Back Door. Concordia, St. Louis 63118, 1988.
Heck, Joel. New Member Assimilation. Condordia, St. Louis, 1988.
Hunter, George, III. The Contagious Congregation. Abingdon, 1979. 150 pgs. Hunter
has provided fresh insights into local congregational growth. The book has become an
Abingdon best-seller.
_____. Your Church Has Doors: How to Open the Front and Close the Back. Church
Growth Center, 1983. 103 pgs. Church growth expert Kent Hunter expounds on eight
4
“keys” to open doors to growth in your church: faith, aftercare, incorporation, integrity,
assimilation, accountability, pruning and amputation.
Hunter, Kent. Foundations for Church Growth. Church Growth Center, Caruna, IN.
_____. Friendship Evangelism (Heart to Heart). Same, (video).
_____. Introducing Church Growth Today. (tapes)
Huffard, Everett. Church Growth Principles on II Corinthians.
Jackson, Neil E.. 100 Great Growth Ideas. Broadman, Nashville.
Jenson, Ron and Jim Stevens. Dynamics of Church Growth. Baker, 1981. 200 pgs.
This adds to church growth literature by bringing to bear the Campus Crusade insights,
laying a strong biblical base, incorporating management principles, and offering
practical suggestions for action at the end of each chapter.
Kelly, Dean M. Why Conservative Churches are Growing. Rev. ed. Macon, GA: Mercer
University Press, 1986. 180 pgs. This was probably the most discussed religious book
in the seventies. It deals with the function that churches have in society and shows how
liberal churches usually turn out to be socially weak institutions. It is a must for students
of church growth.
Logan, Bob and Jeff Rast. Church Planting Workbook. (They offer seminars.)
McGavran, Donald and Win Arn. How to Grow a Church. Regal, 1973. 180 pgs. In a
question and answer format, McGavran sets forth his thoughts on American church
growth. This is the best selling church growth book to date with over 125,000 copies in
print.
_____. Ten Steps for Church Growth. Harper & Row, 1977. A substantial sequel to
How to Grow a Church with many new insights from the authors.
McGavran, Donald and George G. Hunter, III. Church Growth: Strategies That Work.
Abingdon, 1980. 120 pgs. One of the best primers on the Church Growth Movement,
this book also provides practical tips on motivating people for growth, training laity,
helping small churches grow and planting new churches.
McGavran, Donald and C. Peter Wagner. Your Church and Church Growth: A Self
Study Course. Rev. ed. Pasadena: Charles E. Fuller Institute of Evangelism and Church
Growth, 1982. Six audio cassettes and workbook. The condensation of MC500 or
MC520, the fundamental church growth course with Wagner’s comments on
McGavran’s Understanding Church Growth. A 25-hour self study experience.
5
Miles. Church Growth: A Mighty River. Broadman (esp. for CG literature).
Mylander, Charles. Secrets for Growing Churches. Harper & Row, 1979. 140 pgs. This
book draws many practical applications for American churches from general church
growth principles. Written by a pastor who is seeing it happen in his church.
North, Ira. Balance. (Xn) Gospel Advocate Publishing Co., Nashville, TN.
North, Ira. You Can March for the Master. Nashville: Gospel Advocate Company, 1959.
Pepper, Clayton. Church Growth Today. Quality Press, Abilene, TX, 1998.
Peterson. Evangelism As A Lifestyle.
Redford, Jack. Planting New Churches. Broadman, Nashville, 1978.
Reeves, R. Daniel. Prescription for Church Growth.
Reeves, R. Daniel and Ron Jenson. Always Advancing. Here’s Life Publishers, 1984.
196 pgs. An up-to-date book introducing church growth principles with new information
on church typology and philosophy of ministry.
Schaller, Lyle R. Schaller is undoubtedly the most knowledgeable and skilled church
consultant in America today. A United Methodist by affiliation, he works both for the
Yokefellow Institute and independently. He comes to the church from the field of city
planning. Schaller writes a book a year with Abingdon as well as editing the influential
Creative Church Leadership series which adds four books per year. His books are all
highly relevant to the student of church growth. Eight of his latest books are listed here:
. Activating the Passive Church. Abingdon, 1981. 160 pgs.
. Assimilating New Members. Abingdon, 1978. 130 pgs. (254.5)
. Effective Church Planning. Abingdon, 1979. 170 pgs. (262)
. 44 Ways to Increase Church Attendance. Abingdon, 1988.
. Getting Things Done. Abingdon.
. Growing Plans. Strategies for Increasing Church Membership. Practical.
Abingdon, 1983. 176 pgs.
. Hey! That’s Our Church. Abingdon, 1975.
. The Small Church is Different. Abingdon.
6
Schuller, Robert H. Your Church Has Real Possibilities. Regal Books, 1975. 200 pgs.
In this book Schuller articulates sound church growth and goal-setting principles and
inspires the reader with possibility thinking.
Shenk, Wilbert. Exploring Church Growth. Eerdman’s, Grand Rapids, MI, 1983.
Sisemore, John T. Church Growth Through the Sunday School. Broadman Press, 1983.
156 pgs. Southern Baptists have used the Sunday school as a primary structure for
growth better than any other denomination. Here is how they do it. This excellent book
takes a balanced view of church growth and then stresses adult evangelism and the
adult Sunday school as practical keys. You will not want to miss this one!
Sullivan, Bill. Ten Steps to Breaking the 200 Barrier. Kansas City, MO: Beacon Hill
Press of Kansas, 1988.
Towns, Elmer L., John N. Vaughn, and David J. Seifert. The Complete Book of Church
Growth. Tyndale, 1981. 400 pgs. An amazingly thorough textbook on various case
studies of growth analyzing a number of approaches to ministry in American churches
including a substantial chapter on “The Fuller Factor.”
Trexler, Edgar. Ways to Wake Up Your Church. Philadelphia: Fortress Press, 1969.
Turner, J. J.. Christian Leadership Handbook. West Monroe, LA, Howard Publishing
Company, 1991.
. The Leadership and Church Growth. Lambert Book House, Shreveport, LA
71104.
Vaughan, John N. The World’s Twenty Largest Churches. Baker, 1984. An amazing
piece of research which identifies, describes and analyzes the top super churches. An
indispensable resource for the church growth student.
Wagner, C. Peter. Church Growth: State of the Art. Tyndale, Wheaton IL.
. Church Planting for a Greater Harvest. Regal, (Gospel Light) Ventura, CA.
. Effective Body Building. Here’s Life Publishers, Box 1576, San Bernardino, CA.
. Helping Your Church Grow. (tapes $39.95)
. Leading Your Church to Growth.
. Strategies for Church Growth. Regal, Ventura, CA. 93006.
7
. Your Church Can Be Healthy. Abingdon, 1979. 120 pgs. A description and
analysis of the causes and symptoms of eight major growth-inhibiting diseases of
American churches.
. Your Church Can Grow: Seven Vital Signs of a Healthy Church. Regal, 1976.
Rev. ed. 1980. 170 pgs. Wagner’s first book on American church growth has now become
a basic document in the field. It is in its 13th printing with over 100,000 copies in
print.
Waymire, Bob and C. Peter Wagner. The Church Growth Survey Handbook. Santa
Clara, CA: global Church Growth Bulletin, 1980. 40p. This 8 ½ X 11 inch workbook is a
step-by-step methodology for doing church growth research. It is the authors’ hope that
it will serve to standardize the recording and reporting of church growth worldwide.
Werning, Waldo. Vision & Strategy for Church Growth. Chicago: Moody Press, 1977.
Williams, Jack H. (Ed). Church Growth God’s Way. Williams Publishing, 16105 E. 40th,
Independence, MO 64055.
Yeakley, Flavil R., Jr. Why Churches Grow. Anderson, 1977. 85 pgs. A social scientist
summarizes his Ph.D. dissertation on the reasons for growth among the Churches of
Christ. (Xn)
Zunkel, C. Wayne. Growing the Small Church: A Guide for Church Leaders. David C.
Cook, 1982. 110 pgs. This is an extremely practical manual with extensive professional
artwork for teaching its contents to others. It is much more than theory. If its principles
are followed, the progress for growth in almost any small church will be good.
-1-
Evangelism
Where Are You On The Growth Development Scale?
Where Are You on the Growth Development Scale?
Ignorance Information Infusion Individual
Change
Institutional
Change
Awkward
Application
Integration Innovation
Why can two or three churches attend the same church growth seminar, apply the same
strategies, and one church will show results, while another may not?
Through the “Two Year Growth Process” (conducted by CHURCH GROWTH, Inc. for
individual and clusters of churches) we have found that an appropriate strategy for
church growth will depend on a number of factors. A growth strategy for one church
may be highly successful ... the same strategy for another could cause a church split!
I recently developed what I call a “Church Growth Development Scale.” Locating your
congregation on this scale can help you determine the appropriate steps to take in
moving your church forward in growth. As you study the “Church Growth Development
Scale” keep the following insights in mind:
1. Growth requires moving from one step on the Scale to the next. A church cannot
jump over a step, although sometimes leaders inadvertently try, and encounter
problems.
2. Individuals change before organizations change. Some church leaders try to
change the organizational structure prior to changing individuals, and encounter
frustrations.
3. Correct strategy for growth will vary depending on where the church is presently
located on the Scale.
4. Movement on the Scale may be forward or backward.
5. Leadership in a church may be a different place on the Scale than membership.
This may create problems if it is assumed both groups are at the same point.
On the next page is a more detailed description of each stage. Can you identify where
your church presently is? Which direction it is moving?
(continued)
-2-
1. Ignorance
Congregation and leadership are uninformed of mandate to make disciples. Departments /
ministries have no unified direction or sense of mission. The congregation tends to be selfcentered
and self-serving.
2. Information
General interest in learning more. Questions arise as to what results “church growth” might
have for our church. If no further action is taken, increased indifference and apathy toward the
Great Commission develops.
3. Infusion
Penetration of new ideas into the status quo may cause confrontation with apathy, prejudice,
tradition. Tendency is to focus on problems. The need is for a dream to carry the church to the
next step.
4. Individual Change
“Church Growth Eyes” begin to develop in some leadership. Growing number of questions arise
on whether present church activities are bringing satisfactory results. Little institutional
reinforcement exists for members advocating change.
5. Organizational Change
Church’s goals reviewed and clarified in light of growing mission priority. New activities and
ministries are introduced in response to the new focus. New committees and structures may be
formed.
6. Awkward Application
Some failures and some successes experienced. Initially limited applications of church growth
thinking. Some mistakes are made, learning process is rapid. Need for additional knowledge,
training, resources becomes apparent.
7. Integration
Growing comfort in understanding and application of church growth principles. Fewer dramatic
changes, more refinement of previously initiated changes. Growing sense of accomplishment
and secondary wave of results and success occurs.
8. Innovation
The base of support and involvement by membership and application of principles expands to
other areas. Significant results are achieved and growth begins to perpetuate itself.
-3-
Suggestions for Moving Forward on the Growth Scale
Once you determine where your church is on the “Growth Development Scale,” how do you
move forward? Here are some suggestions ...
Ignorance to Information
• Show church growth films • Precede leader/committee meetings with study of church growth
books • Emphasize growth/outreach in sermons • Establish biblical base that “It’s God’s will
that His Church grow” • Study growth and the early church in adult education classes.
Information to Infusion
• Establish a church growth task force • Study church’s growth patterns • Formulate and
communicate a “dream” for the church • Sponsor a church growth seminar • Conduct a
diagnostic study of the church/community • Seek support of all leadership • Expand reading /
study in church growth.
Infusion to Individual Change
• Share information from church diagnostic process • Ask what are appropriate responses to
diagnostic information • Use church growth consultants • Give high visibility to church’s dream
• Seek public commitment to growth by all leadership • Conduct survey to identify areas of
need and opportunity for outreach.
Individual Change to Organizational Change
• Establish/review statement of purpose • Involve members in setting growth goals, objectives
• Identify needed new groups, new roles, new tasks • Continuing education for task force •
Keep the “dream” in front of membership • Emphasize changes as additions not replacements
• Use proven growth methods.
Organizational Change to Awkward Application
• Publicly recognize and appreciate growth leaders • Closely monitor growth projects •
Quickly recycle potential failures • Communicate early successes • Preacher/Staff model
commitment.
Awkward Application to Integration
• Encourage and inform “middle adopters” • Provide growth events for larger congregation to
become involved • Expand number of roles available in outward-focused areas (Class II) •
Sponsor a second church growth seminar for updating.
Integration to Innovation
• Enlarge staff with director of evangelism/church growth • Celebrate God’s blessing • Share
credit with all • Enlarge the dream • Build disciples and mature Christians from new members.
-1-
How To Use Steps To A Successful Family
-2-
-1-
Prospect Sources For Sowing And Reaping - The Individual Christian
PROSPECT SOURCES FOR SOWING AND REAPING - THE INDIVIDUAL
CHRISTIAN
1. Non-Christian mate
2. Non-Christian children
3. Non-Christian relative
a. Those close to you
b. Those with stresses and problems in their lives
c. Those with special times in their lives
4. Non-Christian friends
a. Friends that have problems and stresses in their lives
i. death
ii. divorce
iii. family problems
iv. business problems
v. sickness
vi. other
b. Friends you work with
c. Friends you play golf with, fish with, etc.
d. Friends you shop with, have exercise class with, go to the beauty salon
with, etc.
5. Classmates at school, college, art and craft classes, etc.
6. Neighbors
7. Business contacts
a. People you commonly do business with
b. People who commonly do business with you
c. Employers
d. Employees
e. Fellow employees
8. Casual contacts
a. The friendly postman
b. Waitresses, gas station attendants, store clerks, etc., that commonly wait
on you
c. Your barber or hairdresser
d. Other
-2-
9. People in need of benevolent aid that you know well or casually
a. On your block
b. At work
c. At school
d. Other
10. Newcomer
a. On your block
b. At work
c. At school
d. Other
11. Home contacts
a. Guest in your home
b. Those attending Bible study in your home
c. Those attending a party at your home
d. Delivery people
e. Workers who knock on your door
f. Other
12. Those seeking your help
a. Counseling
b. Encouragement
c. Benevolent
d. Other
13. Friends or relatives in hospital or rest/convalescent home
14. Friends or relatives of friends or relatives in hospital or rest/convalescent home
15. Referrals
a. Fellow worker
b. Parents of children’s friends
c. Friend of another friend
d. Prayer list (non-Christians)
16. Questioners – someone who has questioned you about religious matters
17. Objectioners – someone who has objected to the church
18. Parents of children for whom you babysit either at your home or their home
-3-
19. Contacts at births
a. Friends or relatives who have a new child
b. Friends or relatives who visit you when you have a new child
c. Individuals you meet at the hospital who have a new child at the same
time you or your friends or relatives
20. Wedding contacts
a. Relatives, friends, or others attending your wedding
b. Relatives, friends, or others attending your children’s wedding
c. Contacts at weddings of relatives, friends, or others you attend
21. Funeral contacts
a. Relatives, friends, or others attending the funeral of your loved one
b. Contacts at funerals of relatives, friends, or others you attend
22. House-to-house contact
23. Delinquent denominational church member
24. Delinquent Christian
25. Those who are ill
26. Friends and relatives of those who are ill
27. Those who have stress or problems in their lives
28. Hospital contacts.
-4-
PROSPECT SOURCES FOR SOWING AND REAPING - THE LOCAL
CONGREGATION
1. Prospects from individual Christians
2. Non-Christian mates
3. Non-Christian children
4. Other non-Christian relatives of members
5. Delinquent Christian
6. Visitor to worship
7. Visitor to Bible school
8. Visitor to Ladies’ Bible Class
9. Visitor to VBS
10. Visitors to World Evangelism Forum
11. Visitor to group evangelism meetings
12. Visitor to seminars, workshops, film showings, etc.
13. Visitor to Monday night classes
14. Visitor to neighborhood Bible studies
15. Visitor to social activity of Christians
16. Visitor to fellowships
17. Visitor to youth programs and events
18. Visitor to classes, graduations, etc.
19. Visitor via bus evangelism
20. Visitor to witness baptisms
21. Newcomer to city
-5-
22. Neighbor (or special) Bible class
23. Those responding to invitation for further study, etc.
24. Referral - prayer list
25. Counseling - those seeking help
26. Bible correspondence course enrollee
27. Hospital contacts
28. Rest/convalescent home contacts
29. Those who are ill
30. House-to-house contacts
31. Benevolent contacts
32. Referrals to the church for whatever reason
33. Day school contacts
34. Youth camp contacts
35. Bible Chair contacts
36. College ministry contacts
37. Radio contacts
38. TV contacts
39. Newspaper ad contacts
40. Herald of Truth contacts
41. Heartbeat contacts
42. Obituaries in newspaper
43. Divorces in the legal section of newspaper
44. Wedding section of newspaper
-6-
45. Engagement section of newspaper
46. Birth announcements in newspaper
47. Individuals in newspaper undergoing disaster, etc.
48. Contacts at births
49. Wedding contacts at church building
50. Funeral contacts at church building
51. Business contacts of local congregation
52. Fair booth contacts
53. Jail/prison contacts inside
54. Jail/prison contacts outside
55. Youth contacts
56. Religious survey
57. Contacts from direct mail work
58. Contacts from tract distribution or display
59. Parents and workers of Cub Scout den
60. Parents and workers of Boy Scout troop
61. Parents and workers of Explorer post
62. Contact with persons having alcohol problems
63. Contact with persons having drug problems
-1-
Target Group Evangelism - Unlocking A Secret To Growth
“Target Group Evangelism” - Unlocking A
Secret to Growth
Churches desiring significant evangelistic results and membership growth in the
coming decade will need to become effective at what I call “target group evangelism.”
This is a strategy of outreach which identifies one or more specific segments of the
surrounding community (“people groups”), and then researches, communicates with,
and builds bridges to persons in that group.
There are hundreds of “target groups” in America today. “Baby boomers” are
probably the most publicized. (See the new book, The Missing Generation, by Bob
Bast.) But there are myriad more; plenty to go around for all churches, and then some.
In this issue of the Growth Report we will suggest some universal principles of
“target group evangelism,” then look at two groups in particular.
Let’s begin with some common steps for effective “target group evangelism:”
1. Determine which “target group/s” you intend to focus upon. A reasonable
way to start is to examine your present membership and identify your
present strengths - the people groups you are already attracting and
ministering to. And, by enlarging your focus to other target groups, you
can stretch your church’s growth potential in new areas and ways.
2. Abolish your evangelism committee ... and replace it with “target group
task forces” - one for each group you are focusing upon.
3. Have each task force develop a timeline and then implement the following
activities:
A. Define the “target group.” The more specific, the better. “Singles”
is not a good target group definition. “Widowers” or “divorcees” or
“never marrieds” improves it. Adding age, gender, geographic
location, etc. will make the definition better still. Remember, “target
group evangelism” is a rifle shot, not a shot gun.
B. Know your audience. This is a research project. Interview at least
15 persons representing this group; more if possible. Conduct mail
and/or phone surveys. Visit the local chamber of commerce, real
estate offices, library. Learn as much as you can about who these
people are, where they live, what they do in their spare time, what
their attitudes are on relevant issues, what they think about, worry
about, etc. The more you know about this “people group,” the
better.
-2-
C. Communicate with your “target group.” Focus on an issue they feel
is important (not one you feel is important). Here’s where your
research comes in. Use at least three “communication vehicles,”
such as mail, phone call, personal invitation, flyer, radio spots,
newspaper ads, articles, etc.
D. Provide an opportunity for response. Whether it’s a coupon to tear
out and mail, a phone number to call, or an event to attend, provide
a way to let them say, “I’m interested in learning more.” Be sure to
make the opportunity for response easy. Don’t make people take
one “giant step,” let them take several “baby steps.”
The less threatening the response, the more people you’ll see respond.
To elicit the response, you will need to offer something of interest/value. It
may be a free booklet, a Saturday morning seminar, a brochure on a
church program, etc.
4. Identify your church members who share common characteristics (i.e. they
are in the same “people group”) with those persons who have just
responded.
5. “Link” the persons in your church with prospects who have responded to
your communication. The “linking” process should be based on common
characteristics between the prospect(s) and the member(s), such as age,
interests, marital status, family status, occupation, location, etc. The more
things in common, the better. (For example, a member is asked to contact
“John Doe” and plan an informal get-together based on their common
interest of golf. The member calls up two other golfing friends in the
church, and sets up a Saturday foursome.)
6. Start one (or more) new groups specifically for your identified “target
group. “Don’t plan for these newcomers to become assimilated into your
established groups. A few might, but most won’t because of the difficulty
in breaking the relational history already established in the group. See the
resource book: How to Start & Grow Small Groups.
(Note: #5 & #6 can and should go on concurrently.)
Tuesday School
TUESDAY SCHOOL...
Applications for Tuesday School are now ready. Tell friends,
neighbors, and relatives who have a three or four year old about it.
(Tuesday School is not for children of members of the church.) There
is no cost to parents; it is absolutely free. We will be starting
Tuesday School on September 15, and it will be each Tuesday that
public school is in session. Our school will begin at 9:30 A.M. and
end at 12:00 Noon at the building. Transportation will be provided by
the parents of the Tuesday School children. There will be five
classes taught each Tuesday and they are the following:
BIBLE
ABC’s
ORGANIZED GAMES
ARTS and CRAFTS
REFRESHMENTS, SINGING, AND STORY TIME
To enroll a child, the parent can come to the church office from 9:00 A.M.
- 12:00 Noon and 1:00 - 4:00 P.M. Monday through Friday. It won’t take but a
few minutes of their time to fill out the application.
HELP MAKE TUESDAY SCHOOL A SUCCESS.
Baptizing Behind Bars
Baptizing Behind Bars
OKLAHOMA CITY – The annual study of prison ministries coordinated by College
Church of Christ reports 1,985 baptisms in 1988, which is a 29% increase from 1987.
A total of 368 congregations in 37 states report prison ministries. The study was
presented in June at the 16th Annual Jail and Prison Ministry Workshop at the Westlake
Church of Christ in Indianapolis.
TOP 10 CONGREGATIONS IN NUMBER OF BAPTISMS FOR 1988 OF PRISON WORKS
City Congregation 1984 1985 1986 1987 1988
Oklahoma City * Fishers of Men • • • • 301
Huntsville, Texas * Prison Ministry 183 117 178 122 205
Plainview, Texas Garland St. • • • 137 201
San Antonio, Texas Northside • • • • 192
Madison, Tenn. Madison 67 93 142 120 151
Amarillo, Texas * Prison Ministry 216 215 202 226 147
Corpus Christi, Texas Windsor Park • 152 161 137 112
Jacksonville, Fla. San Jose • • • • 91
Houston, Texas Bammel Road • • • 44 59
Stuart, Fla. Lake Street • • 54 • 55
*Multi-congregational ministry
Benevolence Handout
Used by Rick Walker to hand out to those coming for food, commodities and clothing (once a month or quarter, etc.).
Begun 6/93
(THE POWER FOR MANKIND)
1. Romans 1:16 “For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who
believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.”
YES - NO Is the gospel of God powerful enough to save everyone who believes?
YES - NO If we reject God’s gospel, will we be rejecting God’s power to save us?
(THE PROBLEM OF MANKIND)
2. Romans 3:23 “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”
YES - NO Have we ALL sinned and fallen short of God’s glory?
(THE HOPE OF MANKIND)
3. Romans 5:8-9 “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for
us. Much more then, having now been justified (made righteous) by His blood, we shall be saved
from the wrath of God through Him. “
YES - NO Though we are sinners and deserve His wrath, in love, did God allow Jesus to die for us?
YES - NO Is it true that no matter how sinful we are, God can make us righteous by Jesus’ blood?
(THE RESPONSE OF MANKIND)
4. Romans 6:1-4 “What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace might increase? May it never be!
How shall we who died to sin still live in it? Or do you not know that allow us who have been
baptized into Christ have been baptized into His death? Therefore we have been buried with Him
through baptism into death, in order that as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of
the Father, so we too might walk in newness of life.”
YES - NO As our response to Jesus, are we now to consider ourselves dead to sin?
YES - NO Are we also to respond by being buried in baptism to show that we have died to sin?
YES - NO After our baptism are our lives new, i.e., we get to start over again?
YES - NO Have you been immersed/buried in baptism so that you may begin your life anew?
(THE DECISION OF MANKIND)
5. Romans 10:9 “If you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from
the dead, you shall be saved.”
YES - NO Once we have died to sin, are we to make the decision that Jesus is Lord of our lives?
YES - NO Can we be saved if we don’t make Him Lord, or if we don’t believe in His resurrection?
(THE LIFE OF MANKIND)
6. Romans 12:1-2 “I urge you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living, and holy
sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed
to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
YES - NO By making Jesus Lord, can we continue to live by conforming to this world’s standards?
YES - NO Might this change lead us to sacrifice our bad habits which are not acceptable to God?
(THE CHURCH FOR MANKIND)
7. Romans 16:16 “Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ salute you.”
YES - NO Do we read about the church of Christ in the Bible?
YES - NO Is this the church that is made up of people who have accepted the HOPE, RESPONSE, DECISION, and
LIFE of mankind?
If you would like to check your answers or if there are any questions or decisions with which we may help you, PLEASE
give us a call at the ------- church of Christ. We want to be your family’s church!
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Evangelistic Program - The Area System
EVANGELISTIC PROGRAM
THE “AREA SYSTEM”
Use these ideas and adjust them to those that will work best in your area.
I. ORGANIZATION
A. Divide the congregation into four alphabetic groups (if there are more than
30 in each group, have two organizations with 15 - 20 in each which would
then cover twice the area).
B. Have two leaders over each group for one year.
C. Assign leaders a certain geographic area they become completely familiar
with (streets, demographics, etc.) within the “target area” of your
building/meeting place.
D. Promote regularly by a systematic (not helter-skelter) way the necessity of
everyone
E Each group would be responsible for work once a month on a Saturday.
5th Sundays would be used to make up when holidays came for certain
group’s regular meeting days (example: 4th of July, etc.).
in the group coming every time their group is to work.
F. The time would be 9:30 a.m. to 11:45 a.m. on Saturday; if a Sunday is
used the time would be 2:00 p.m. to 3:45 p.m.
G. Not everyone would be able to come each time, but each person would
probably come 4 to 7 times a year (which is more than many of us are
doing now).
The advantages of this program could be one or more of the following:
1. Makes the community aware of our existence, who we are, and
what we do and teach.
2. Results in the salvation of many.
3. Causes a greater fellowship among a mixed segment of the church.
4. Shows all of us that there is more to Christianity than just church
attendance.
5. Causes some who are “proud” to become humble as they “lower”
themselves to do service for the Lord.
6. Shows us the need to study more as we see we don’t know the
answers to everything we’re asked.
7. Shows us how to depend on each other more as we are challenged
and attacked by those who ridicule our work.
8. Gets the congregation to begin teaching.
9. Causes the congregation to grow in spirit, size and quality.
II. PREPARE A FOLLOW-UP PROGRAM SECOND TO NONE.
Ill. POSSIBLE ACTIVITIES (Can be done door-to-door, by phone, or by mail.)
A. Pass out brochures, ads for upcoming events, etc.
B. Set up BCC’s.
C. Set up home studies.
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D. Offer help (financial, transportation, repairs, maintenance, etc.).
Look for those to help, not just money food and clothing, but any kind of
help. This would make our door to door work different than the J.W.’s and
Mormons. Ours would be to serve.
IV. POSSIBLE SURVEY FOR COMMUNITY
The advantage of this kind of approach is that THEY are the ones who are doing
the input; you are not telling them anything. People respond better to this
approach.
A. Are you an active member of a nearby church? (This is your target
audience.)
B. What do you think is the greatest need in (our town)?
C. Why do you think most people don’t attend church?
D. If you were looking for a church in the area, what kinds of things would
you look for?
E. What advice would you give churches in our area if they wanted to be
helpful?
F. TWO OPTIONS FOR THE ENDING
1. We offer (one of the things they mentioned they liked)
at Hometown church of Christ. We’d like to leave this brochure
with you to tell you more about it and invite you to come find out for
yourself.
2. Would you be interested in meeting with us and helping us develop
that kind of church?
1
International Student Evangelism And You
INTERNATIONAL STUDENT EVANGELISM AND YOU
Christians Concerned About International Students
One million international students attend universities outside their native
countries each year. Currently close to 350,000 from 185 countries are enrolled in
American colleges and universities. They come from Nigeria, Saudi Arabia, China,
Japan, India, countries of Europe, and other nations.
These internationals speak English, work on their degrees from 2 to 5 years and
are curious about the American lifestyle. Although their first priority is their own
academic studies, they want to learn about American culture, economics, music, art,
family life, and religion.
New to our city, life for many international students becomes somewhat lonely
and self-contained on the campus. In their tenure at a university, many are never once
invited into an American home. More important, these “world citizens” need to see what
an American Christian home is like. They should upon graduation leave our city with
Christ in their lives and God’s Word in their hearts.
Without doubt here is a “mission field” in our own back yards in countless cities in
50 states where congregations surround universities. For the future redemption of the
foreign student it’s time we opened our homes, shared our food, gave out Bibles,
discussed the Christian life, and converted these lovely citizens from abroad.
How about volunteering as a host Christian or host family, befriending one
international student? This is a natural friendly way to introduce the Christian life and
Biblical teaching to another human being. This does not mean that you would have him
or her living in your home. Nor would you be responsible in any way for their financial
support.
Methods of Contacting Internationals
Remember that college students, young married couples, middle aged couples
with children, and “classics” (60s to 70s) can befriend and eventually teach Christ to the
foreign student. They are open to friendship, cross-cultural learning, and building with
the personal ties of mutual appreciation.
One way of contacting the international student is through the “host family”
program of the university near you. In this approach the foreign student office of the
university provides the student with a questionnaire. The student checks a question
which asks him or her, “Would you like to have an American host and be invited to an
American home?” If they answer “yes” then the international friends office sends out
2
material to civic organizations and churches. You simply fill out a form with your name,
address, occupation, etc. Indicate your preference for a male or female student and
from what country. Return the form to the office of the university, and they will send you
the name, address, telephone number, and background information on your student.
Then you either contact your student by letter or by telephone.
Another way to attract foreign students is to solicit a group of English teachers in
the congregation. These teachers do not have to be professional teachers nor have
previous experience in teaching conversational English. The ideal teacher-student ratio
is one Christian teacher to two or three students. Usually college students have more
time on weekends, so 7:30 to 9:30 p.m. on Friday nights, or 3 to 5 p.m. on Saturday
afternoons is a convenient time. The study area can be a home, Bible Chair facility, or
a church building. Materials used can be conversational English textbooks, newspaper
and magazine articles, books on American proverbs, as well as the English Bible. God
will be with you as you “bond” yourself to the heart of the international student. You
also provide a realistic need for the student – learning how to express himself in
English.
College students can also form an international outreach group where each
Christian “adopts” only one or two foreign students. Limiting to one or two students,
quality time can be spent in leisure, meeting needs, discussing life’s problems and
introducing Biblical teaching. Where international students eat in dormitory cafeterias,
American Christians can purposely sit down across from the foreign student. After
casual eating and light conversation, then names, addresses, and telephone numbers
can be exchanged.
One student from Taiwan said, “At first I was too busy in my studies to want a
close American friend. Then later I was asked to meet at Burger King for a meal. We
talked for about three hours. That’s when a great friendship between us began.”
Another student from Indonesia said, “When I came to the U.S., I knew nothing about
American culture. But American friends made me feel truly welcome. I had someone to
call. I wasn’t here alone.”
A fourth way of contacting internationals is for the church to host an international
friends dinner at the church building on a Friday or Saturday evening. Good food and a
program of songs and presentations about American culture, language, history of the
state you live in, and Christianity can be interesting. Two or three meetings annually
should be planned, and also don’t forget the summer months when many foreign
students remain at the campus. Most important, Christian singles or families should
“pair off” with one or two students at these dinners. Then personal relationships
naturally begin to deepen as the students are invited into homes, to go on outings, and
to share their lives with American Christians who care about them.
Inviting the Student Into Your Home
Sharing a relaxed, unhurried meal is a beautiful cross-cultural way for the
Christian and the international student to get acquainted. Of course don’t be surprised if
your guest from abroad is late to your home by 20 or 30 minutes. We Americans live by
3
the clock, yet from their culture and background, punctuality may not always be
honored.
Usually internationals eat similar foods that we Americans have on our dinner
tables, although they are cooked differently. From time to time it may be discovered
that some students do not eat pork or beef because of religious reasons. Yet normally
what you daily prepare for yourself or for the family will be acceptable. Rich desserts
may need to be given in smaller portions or made with 1/3 of the sugar normally used.
If you start a meal with a prayer as is the custom of Christians, take a few minutes to
explain the custom to your guest.
Arranging activities for your international friend is not as difficult as you might
think. The majority of these students truly miss friends and relatives as they start their
new life abroad. Especially after heavy testing or deadline projects are finished, the
foreign student is ready to relax and be with friends. Remember that timing is important
in planning activities. In other words, a student might decline an invitation one or two
times because of an upcoming test or term paper.
Therefore, let the international friend know at least a week ahead of an activity.
Putting an invitation in writing with the date, time, and description of the event should
make things clear. Then a phone call the day before an event is always helpful.
Consider some of the following interesting and enjoyable activities: have a picnic
at a nearby park; go to an American garage sale; go walking around a mail; attend a
ballgame or concert; listen to music and talk. And don’t forget your city’s museums,
lakes, restaurants, and cultural events like fairs or arts and crafts exhibitions.
Of course, working in a garden or hiking in the wooded areas or fishing can be
pleasant for everyone. Or just enjoying a quiet supper and casual conversation in a
warm, friendly Christian home is “entertainment enough” for a person far away from his
or her country. He or she might also have a good time playing with your children, or
listening to your daughter or granddaughter play the piano.
When foreign students first arrive on our college campuses, they have immediate
practical needs. Where are the supermarkets with the best prices or the discount
stores? How can they find a good family doctor or dentist? Where is a bank that caters
to college students? They may need advice on purchasing a car or finding a good
mechanic. Serving the needs of others is actually central teaching from our Lord, and
the foreign student has realistic needs to be met.
On the average, you spend time with the international student about every two
weeks. This time is arranged at your convenience and there is no set schedule to
follow. You can just be yourself and utilize the talents and resources that God has
given you to woo and attract your friend to the Friend of sinners.
4
Introducing the Bible
“Most Americans are indifferent to me and pay me no attention. Then there are
the religious people. They show an interest in me until it appears to them that I’m not
interested in Christianity. Then they drop me and I never see them again,” a foreign
student said.
Many times if we “get too religious too fast,” then the international will feel that we
are only interested in converting him to Christianity. In other words, in his mind our
friendship is not genuine. Always be true to yourself and your student, and offer
authentic friendship in Christ. Try in a very natural way to share your life with him or
her, and open up your private world to them.
One way to get into a religious discussion (only after a few months) is to first ask
the student questions about his country’s religions. Become truly curious about what
his religious beliefs are. Always show respect and interest in what your guest from
abroad holds as morally right and sacred. You might want to spend a short time in the
encyclopedia to deepen your understanding of his culture. Also check your local library
or bookstore for books explaining his religious philosophy of life.
Don’t forget that your own story of how you became a Christian might be
interesting to the student. An eventual study of the advantages of living the Christian
life shows practical application of God’s principles to our present times. Or ask the
student if he would be interested in a short two or three month study of the life of Jesus
Christ. Meet once a week on the average, and keep the study to an hour and a half,
and then have refreshments. A study of the Gospel of John is recommended showing
from select passages the beauty of the character and life of Christ. Or a three month
study of the attributes of God is always appropriate for the non-Christian.
Remember that through your local bookstore, you can order your friend a copy of
the Bible or New Testament in his own language. Tracts in the native language of the
international are available from a missionary of the church. It could be that your international
friend has never had his own Bible, nor read many religious materials of a
positive nature about Christianity.
As your relationship with your student deepens and in God’s grace becomes
more pleasant, continue to place the name and needs of your friend before the
Heavenly Father. Ask for patience, wisdom, and perseverance in reaching out in
service to him or her.
Follow Up . . . After They Leave
Sometimes we find that we befriend an international for only 9 months or possibly
as long as 2 years before he leaves to return home or study elsewhere. If the student is
moving to another state for an advanced degree, contact the elders and local evangelist
of the church in that city. Give them a background sketch of the foreign student and the
progress that you made with the student in Biblical teaching. Make a long distance call
to the church building later to discuss “follow up” procedures with the student by the
church there.
5
To the international, the gift of friendship continues for a lifetime. Keep the
communication lines open by sending a brief letter, a birthday card, a family snapshot
once a year, or call long distance every three or four months. Remember the
international student’s redemption and eternal destiny is hanging in the balance. With
effectual follow up, after a short while you may be informed by the church of his or her
baptism by co-workers in Christ at their location.
A Summary of Guidelines ....
1. Befriend only one or two international students so that you and your family can
spend quality time with him or her.
2. Just be yourself and, by imitating the compassionate Christ, offer sincere
friendship.
3. Try to get together on a regular basis so that your friendship will develop and
begin to truly deepen.
4. Learn to share yourself with the student, and let him know that you genuinely
care about his personal life and future.
5. Learn from the student what he or she enjoys in life (e.g. in areas of music,
sports, hobbies, food) and where their immediate needs are.
6. Plan invitations to dinner or activities right after major testing when he or she is
more likely to be in the mood to get away from campus fife.
7. On major American holidays (prior to your own family get-togethers), be sure to
honor the international friend in your home. This shows him that during
America’s most important “festivals” he is always thought of and included.
8. Allow the international to do some things for you (cook his favorite foods, work in
the yard, etc.) so that the friendship won’t be one-sided.
9. Don’t start right away by getting “too religious too fast” with your friend from
abroad.
10. Eventually you will want to give your student a Bible in his own language. It may
be the first Bible of his own that he has ever had. Religious tracts in the
student’s language are also available through missionaries on the field.
11. Order from the Sunset bookstore, the following “How To” brochures (3723 34th
Street, Lubbock, Texas 79410, (806) 797-2249): Teaching The Bible To African
Students; Teaching The Bible To Chinese Students; Teaching The Bible To
Hispanic Students.
12. Every two months meet with others in the congregation for discussion of
progress and problem areas in international students evangelism. Continue in
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private and collective prayers to ask the Lord of Harvest for vision and
compassion in how to truly serve and Biblically teach these “world citizens”
among us.
Al Henderson
7
Name
I would like to volunteer for the following:
( ) International Friends Dinner
( ) Teach conversational English (2 hours a week)
( ) Being a Host person or family (invite into home once a month)
( ) Exclusive outreach as a Christian woman to a student’s wife
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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Visitors
Determining Our Openness Quotient
VISITORS
Determining Our Openness Quotient
Respond as honestly as possible to the following questions.
Total positive points
Total negative points
Openness quotient is
Excellent More than adequate
Average Less than adequate
Yes No Points plus or minus
1. Visitors are given ribbons or name tags.
2. Every worshiper wears a name tag.
3. Visitors sign a guest book, or there is attendance registration.
4. There is more than enough parking.
5. Our auditorium is full for worship.
6. Members leave the closest parking spots for the handicapped and visitors.
7. I take the initiative to talk with those I do not know well.
8. Our congregation is about the right size .
9. If someone is sitting alone, I sit by them.
10. Classrooms are identified.
11. There is a register of rooms at the entrance.
12. Rest rooms are easy to find.
13. Ushers greet people and show them to seats.
14. Service times and the name of the church are clearly identified outside.
15. I go to church with a mental list of people I need to see, items I need to check on.
16. We have a refreshment time after worship.
17. At fellowship times I usually spend my time talking with friends.
18. Visitors to church are visited within 48 hours.
19. We have some specific strategies for growth.
20. The church is united on wanting the church to grow.
21. I feel good about my preacher.
22. Most of our elders have been members of our congregation for at least five years.
23. I feel good about our brotherhood.
24. There is continual tension in our congregation.
25. In the worship services terms are used and references made that someone new
ld d d
© 1982 David C. Cook Publishing Co. Permission granted to reproduce for classroom only - not for resale.
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Reaching Different Ages
Ways To Build A Morally Powerful ‘Youth Ministry’ In A Small Church
Ways to build a morally powerful ‘youth ministry’ in a small church
I recently met with some adult youth leaders and volunteers. We were
discussing adolescents, volunteering, and youth culture. Someone asked, “Can you
have a youth ministry in a small church?” The answer is “no” and “yes.” If you wait until
you have extra money, an intern, or “enough” young people, the answer is “no.” If you
love the youth you already have, use volunteers and do creative things that don’t
require huge amounts of money, the answer is “yes.”
I am always encouraged at large youth gatherings. I get to see a lot of my youth
ministry friends. So many of these, however, are adults and college students who
volunteer to help with young people at their small church.
A small church has parents, college students, or young married couples who can
volunteer to work with the youth. These often have extra time, get some small stipend,
or want the best for kids. Whatever the reason, these people make youth ministry
happen in small churches. They might say they don’t know very much about youth
ministry, but they do want students to love the Lord, be like Christ and serve his church.
Here are some ideas for your small church youth ministry.
• First, start with what you have. If you have one student in your church, you
have youth ministry potential. Get one adult with a passion to see that one student
grows spiritually, and you have a youth ministry. I know youth ministers with many
students in their ministries. They love it, but they hate it. Often they say, “I wish there
were only a few, so I could spend time with them all.”
• Second, develop a plan. Spend some time casting a vision for what a youth
ministry might be like, considering the needs of your youth, your church and your
community. Set achievable goals which reflect concepts that build students spiritually,
mentally, physically, and socially.
• Third, start with a good foundation. Rick Chromey suggests four building
blocks for a good foundation in small church youth ministry – L.I.F.E. Love is the
cornerstone for any ministry, but especially youth ministry. Use members who truly love
young people and are willing to sacrifice their time and money. This is especially
important in a small church where there is more one-on-one relationship potential.
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Involvement is the second part of the foundation. Don’t wait for students to grow
up to be adult workers in the church. Get them involved right now. There are jobs in
the church that youth can do at all spiritual levels. All of the adult jobs we do in church
can be done by youth. Students can welcome new and visiting students. Students can
share the Gospel with others – young and old. Students can visit other students and
pray for them. Bottom line: Get them involved in doing what they were truly created to
do!
Fellowship is the third element of a good foundation in a small church youth
ministry. Students need to learn how to love and accept others. Christian fellowship
gives them a platform to accomplish this task.
Education is the fourth part of a good foundation. Don’t sacrifice education for
entertainment. It used to be that many of our students knew Bible facts. They weren’t
necessarily very good at applying them, but they knew the facts. Now it seems that not
many know the facts, much less the applications of those facts. We must put a priority
on teaching in our youth ministries, whether they are large or small. This teaching must
be followed with examples of application, as well as opportunities to personally apply
biblical concepts in real student life.
Other specific areas to think about:
• One-on-one relationships – Connecting significant adults to students.
• Programming – Meet the needs of the students at your church.
• Family activities – Small churches should capitalize on intergenerational
activities among its families.
• Discipleship – Push students to grow spiritually.
• Evangelism – Challenge your students to share the Gospel with their friends.
• Missions – Team up with a larger group and take your students on a joint
mission trip,
• Service Projects – Do things around your community for others.
• Fun activities – Balance all of the above with reasonable fun activities.
– DUDLEY CHANCEY, Oklahoma City
For more information on youth ministry in small churches, contact Dudley
Chancey at the Youth Ministry Department, Oklahoma Christian University, Box 11000,
Oklahoma City, OK 73136. Phone: (405) 425-5373. E-mail: dudley.chancey@oc.edu.
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Sensitivity: Growing Singles Population Requires Attention
Sensitivity: growing singles population requires attention
The way children grow up in our society is changing. Young people are
prolonging their entry into life’s responsibilities and most are waiting longer to get
married. Consequently, the church has a new adult population that we have not been
accustomed to serving.
The importance of that group was driven home to me in January, when George
C. Creach, Jr. of Kennendale, Texas, wrote about priorities I had outlined in a Chronicle
article last November. Creach’s letter, which was carried in the January Chronicle,
made the important point that one of our fastest-growing groups within the church is our
singles, and he made an eloquent appeal that we recognize the significance of the
singles and do more to prepare those young adults for roles of responsibility within the
church.
About the same time that Creach voiced his concern, Todd Gentry, who ministers
to the singles at the South MacArthur Church of Christ in Irving, Texas, wrote Christian
college presidents about the 400 singles at that congregation. He observes that these
young adults are “more prepared for marriage than single life. They expect to marry at
college, prepare to marry, and then graduate as a single. You would think that single
life would be natural, but it isn’t. [They] struggle for a long time with their broken
dreams.”
All of these concerns are justified. Only a small percentage of American youth
marry when they finish high school. A larger number marry when they are in college or
at the time of graduation, but that percentage is smaller than it was one or two
generations earlier. Young adults are taking longer to make their career preparation: a
large number will take four-and-a-half or five years to complete a baccalaureate degree.
Many will go on to professional school or graduate education. Young adults often enter
their first job in their career after they are 25. Marriage typically occurs when they are
closer to 30 than to 20.
The reality of these facts will have a powerful effect on the church. Singles
ministries have become standard aspects of dynamic churches in larger cities.
What creates the problem is the general principle that churches seem to function
best at serving families. From the Bible school to programs of work and ministry,
churches have fashioned their activities to serve couples and families. Unmarried
young adults, widows, widowers, and those divorced Christians do not naturally fit into
every congregation. Singles must persist if they are determined to make a place for
themselves in the average church. And even in churches with elaborate singles
ministries, those believers often feel isolated and alone. Singles perceive that a
“barrier” exists between them and other church members.
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A good friend who recently celebrated his thirtieth birthday and has been part of
several churches since his graduation from college has shared his thoughtful insights
about his experiences as a single. His personal devotion to God and his commitment to
being an active part of the body have prompted him to give much of his energy and time
to church activities. He has worked hard to cultivate friendships among the singles and
among those who are married.
He observes, “All manner of excuses permit congregations to segregate single
people, at least in the minds of its married segment. Unwittingly, [singles] give them a
lot of reason to think as they do . . . For Christian singles, a major force is the
congregation around them at church. Consider that Paul’s apparent praise for
bachelorhood is ignored – I am single, so where are the requests for my abilities?
Where are the invitations to meetings and resource classes? Where is even a passing
mention in any public address that single people have any power to offer service? And
how about a little respect via real responsibility versus seeing me in an afterthought as a
good person to watch the kids while the couples go do the ‘real work of the church’?”
Clearly, singles have a lot of feelings about their place in the church, and it is
time churches made special efforts to break down the wall segregating the unmarried.
It is time to take stock of the talents of every person in the body so that we can make
the fullest use of those talents.
We must also help the singles address their singleness without apology and
without a sense of inadequacy, because, as my friend says, “Admittedly, we get no
better when we come to each other [singles] for support and fellowship. The tensions
that accompany seeking a companion make it difficult for any but the closer ones to be
genuine with each other, so we stifle what we most need from people, any people. We
also battle within ourselves the lifestyle of default – having no accountability, we exist
for the world to grab on and suck out our essence like a leech. We get weaker in heart,
and the distance between us and brethren who ‘don’t know what to do with us’ just
grows. Some of us will work at life and keep our perspective, and grow and give
regardless, because our status and worth is not based on our feelings or on the views of
our misguided pew companions, but rather in a strong sense of purpose defined by a
higher source. Some singles become a Landon Saunders or an Amy Carmichael, but
quietly.
“For most other singles, they must either marry or go someplace where marital
status counts nothing for most purposes. If they don’t, they will become the tonsils and
appendices in the body of Christ, comforting themselves in some illusion of true
membership, but never serving any useful purpose. If they become inflamed and cause
trouble, look for a cure – it can be treated. If not, be sure that you will lose them, and
the Devil is waiting with open arms and laughing over every chance to pierce into Christ
again.”
Todd Gentry makes a strong point that our training of young people in our
churches and in Christian colleges should help prepare for a longer period when people
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will live a single life. In our anxiety over the problem of divorce and failing marriages,
we concentrate our teaching on those relationships while we fail to equip young adults
for a period of living single. We do not equip them as singles for relating to couples,
families and other singles.
Gentry is also concerned that our training of those who minister to the church
does not include preparation for assisting singles of the Kingdom to meld into congregational
life and service.
Perhaps the greatest challenge for the church is for every person to develop a
healthy respect for every other child of God. We need eyes to see only the souls and
potential of our brothers and sisters. Although we have made great strides in dealing
with differences of color and background, and although we are growing in our respect
for people without regard to sex, we have not really begun to deal with singles. A few
efforts have been directed toward healing those destroyed by divorce, and we have long
excelled at giving prompt but not sustained attention to those losing a spouse to death.
With a rapidly growing singles population in every metropolitan church, it is time to get
serious about utilizing the talents and the spiritual gifts of this important group. They
have much, indeed, to offer the Body of Christ.
BAILEY B. MCBRIDE
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America Is Getting Grayer
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Many More Adults and Fewer Youth
Many More Adults and Fewer Youth
It doesn’t take a crystal ball to see the future of the church coming over the
horizon. There will be many more adults and fewer youth! In fact, it’s already
happening.
Is your church ready?
Today in America . . .
● the number if persons over 55 years is growing three times faster than the
national population!
● there are more people over 65 years than under 18!
● those U.S. citizens 65 years and older out number the entire population of
Canada!
Tomorrow in America . . .
● in just 20 years one of every four senior citizens will have children who are
also senior citizens.
● by the year 2010, average life expectancy will be 91 years.
● by the year 2040, when the last of the “baby boomers” reach retirement,
25% of the population will be 65 years or older!
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Drop Outs
Reclaiming ‘Lost Sheep’ Should Be A Major Area Of Evangelistic Thrust
Reclaiming ‘lost sheep’ should be a major area of evangelistic thrust
ne of the very best opportunities for winning souls is to reclaim those who have
been members of the congregation but have fallen away. Some of these may
have quit over some issue or conflict, but most will have just slipped away
through neglect. Whatever the reason why they no longer attend, many congregations
have found this a rich mine to work and report greater numerical results from bringing
people back than from converting new Christians. Every congregation, of course,
should have a plan for reaching those in both conditions.
One smaller congregation in Texas recently reported that it identified 40 persons
who had attended few or no services within the last 16 months and made a special
effort to reclaim as many as they could. They set a Friend’s Day on a particular
Sunday. For this day they scheduled a pot luck and all members tried to bring friends.
Among those who received a special letter of invitation were the 40 they sought to
reclaim. Some members also selected these as friends to invite. Of the 40, 10 came
on the special Sunday and another five came the following Sunday. How many
continue remains to be seen, but getting 15 out of 40 to attend even once within two
Sundays is an excellent start on getting these members back into the fold.
Another Texas congregation identified those who had fallen away over the past
few years. They then assembled a group of members who knew them. This team
reviewed each person’s situation, trying to determine what had been the cause for their
leaving, whether personal conflict, isolation from other members, insufficient
involvement, a doctrinal difference, dissatisfaction with the congregation, growing
apathy to religion or some other cause. Then a group of Christians who were willing to
make visits met and studied how to make such visits most profitable, approaching each
person to win not condemn. Each prospect for renewal was then assigned to a pair of
Christians who would make the visit. Through this careful plan, the congregation was
able to restore many.
Your congregation could develop a reclaiming plan such as this:
• Identify, with the help of two or three long-term members, those still nearby who
formerly attended your congregation and do not attend any neighboring congregation.
Past directories or membership lists could help in making this list.
• Assemble a group to review these cases to determine the reason for their
leaving and how and by whom each might best be approached about returning.
• Have continuing special prayers for these.
• Set a special day to bring friends to worship.
O
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• Carefully word a letter to those no longer coming to encourage them and
provide an “open door” for their return. If you have had any recent changes such as a
new preacher, new elders or some new program that might interest them, include that in
your letter.
• Assign each prospect to one or two who have been trained to make such visits
in a spirit of meekness.
• Those visiting can issue a special invitation to each person or family and deal
as necessary with the cause for having drifted away.
• If a “lost sheep” does attend, be prepared to give that person a warm welcome
and a good follow-up.
• Plan something regularly to reach dropouts. This effort should not be just a
one-time activity.
Every congregation, large and small, should have a Reclaiming Ministry as an
ongoing program. A deacon or member with a heart for this work should be given a
permanent assignment 1) to keep up with those who need to be sought and 2) to
develop and carry out an individual strategy for reclaiming them. A small group can
work together in regularly discussing those who need attention and planning how to
contact each. This group can assign to various members the type of contact they
believe will be best: a direct visit, casual contact, mail, working first with the children, or
some other approach.
Jesus speaks of “going after” a sheep who has gone astray. Surely he had in
mind our reaching out to church members who have strayed.
Try www.oc.edu/colleges/bible/ministry for articles on a wide variety of topics in
ministry.
– STAFFORD NORTH, Oklahoma City
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Drop Outs: Solving The Problem Before It Occurs
Drop Outs: Solving the Problem Before it Occurs
Research is showing that the process by which people arrive at their Christian decision
is a key factor in determining whether they become active members. In fact, one can
actually predict with surprising accuracy which decisions will grow into responsible
church members and which will drop out.
EVANGELISM THAT CREATES DROP-OUTS
1) An evangelistic process which uses a “manipulative” approach tends to create
dropouts.
Evangelism can be categorized into one of three approaches: The first view,
“Information Transmission,” sees evangelism as a one-way act of communicating
spiritual facts. The perceived relationship between the evangelizer and the prospect is
one characteristic of a teacher and student; the goal is to impart certain correct
information. The assumption is that a correct understanding by the hearer will bring a
logical, positive response.
Another approach to evangelism may be called the “Manipulative Monologue” view.
This approach sees evangelism as a process of manipulation. It might center around an
emotional appeal, or a set of carefully prepared questions. The relationship between the
believer and the non-believer approximates a salesperson and a customer; the goal is
to “close the sale.”
A third approach, “Non-manipulative Dialogue,” views evangelism as a two-way process
of honest interaction. The assumption is that not all people see things exactly the same
way, and one “canned approach” is not appropriate in every situation. Characterizing
the relationship between the Christian and non-Christian, in this case, would be friend to
friend; the goal being to share an honest concern for the other.
One study found that when a church member saw evangelism as “Information
Transmission,” 75% of those approached with the Gospel said “No.” Among members
who viewed evangelism as “Manipulative Monologue,” 81% of those approached said
“Yes,” but 85% of that group became inactive within a year. However, when church
members viewed evangelism as “Non-manipulative Dialogue,” 99% of those
approached said “Yes’ and 96% of those stayed.
Which view of evangelism does your training program encourage?
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2) An evangelistic process which sees the goal as a “decision” rather than “disciple”
tends to create drop-outs.
The fact is that not all who make decision become disciples; the two are not
synonymous. The biblical goal is a life transformed and a participating member of
Christ’s Body. A “decision-making” view of evangelism - which focuses on a critical
point in time - tends to create drop-outs because once that decision is made, it is
assumed the goal is accomplished. A “disciple-making” view of evangelism - which
focuses on a lifelong process - encourages a more accurate evaluation of “successful”
strategy.
Are the fruits of your evangelism program measured by decisions or disciples?
3) An evangelistic process which presents the Gospel one time then asks for a
response tends to create drop-outs.
Research shows that in comparing active and inactive members, those who continue as
responsible church members have been exposed to an average of 5.79 different
Christian influences prior to their commitment. Drop-outs, by comparison, had seen or
heard the Christian message only 2.16 times before their decision.
As an evangelistic strategy, the more times a person is exposed to the Gospel message
prior to his/her Christian commitment, the more likely he/she is to understand the
implications of that commitment, and stay. The fewer the Christian exposures prior to a
commitment, the greater likelihood of that person dropping out.
Does your evangelism strategy seek a response on the first contact?
4) An evangelistic process which does not create prior relationships between the
potential member and the church programs/people tends to create drop-outs.
When events leading up to a person’s profession of faith were not due to a relationship
with the people of a local church, there are no ties established with that person and the
church. Thus the perceived value of involvement in the church by the new convert is
low. However, when the new believer has established friendships with members in the
church . . . has become part of a group where he/she feels a sense of “belonging” . . .
when the person has been exposed to the church’s people, beliefs, expectations, then
that new convert’s potential assimilation into the church is increased dramatically.
How many friends do your potential new members have in the church, and how many
programs/ministries are they presently involved in?
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Savage’s Dropout Tract
SAVAGE’S
“DROPOUT TRACT”
Anxiety-provoking event
Rooted in
Reality
Moral
Neurotic
Existential
Related to
Family member
Preacher
Church member
Overwork

Anger

Verbal messages

Change in behavior
(less worship, giving, faith)
 Dropout line 

Waiting period - 6 to 8 weeks

Reinvestment in other activities

50% not in church 
©1982 David C. Cook Publishing Co. Permission granted to reproduce for classroom use only – not for resale.
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Sunday School Growth Ideas
20 Ways To Double Your Sunday School Class
Hundreds of teachers have used these principles
to double the size of their classes.
20 Ways to Double Your Sunday School Class
You can double the attendance of your Sunday School class. Sound
impossible? Well, it isn’t. Hundreds of teachers have used the principles I include here,
and have had fantastic results. Read all the points carefully – then discuss them with
the other teachers in your Sunday School. Think how much could be accomplished for
the Lord if every class in your school doubled in size this year.
1. Set an Overall Goal. If your class has been averaging 15, set a goal of 30.
Prepare a poster with a goal of 30. Write 30 on the chalkboard. Saturate your pupils
with the goal. Goal setting works. A junior class in Florence (SC) hung a large sheet of
paper from one wall to another, then had each of the 26 boys write his name on it and
sign “52" by his autograph. In that way, each student reinforced the class goal of 52.
The total Sunday School set a goal of 1,225. Posters were put on walls, bulletin boards
and doors. Every poster announced the goal of 1,225, but each differently – in German,
Spanish, Greek; upper and lower case letters; Gothic and Roman numbers.
2. Set a Goal for Finding New Prospects. In order for your class to double, attempt to
get twice as many prospects as your average attendance. This means that each
member should suggest 2 names. If there are 30 in the class, get 60 names on your
prospect list.
An adult class in Salem, Va., distributed blank cards to members and asked each
to submit names of friends he or she would like to see in the class. After two weeks of
listing names, the goal still was not reached. Therefore, three ladies were delegated to
phone members of the class and write down the names they suggested. They worked
until 100 new names were gathered.
To have a growing Sunday School class, put as much emphasis on finding
prospects as on recruiting them.
3. Assign Prospect Responsibility. Many growing classes type the names of all
prospects on sheets of paper, then distribute photocopies in the class, assigning
prospects to be contacted before the next week. One group in Ypsilanti, Mich., printed a
motto over its visitation board, “People Expect What You Inspect.” Many members work
in the automobile assembly plants in Detroit where they are taught by GM that people
work according to how closely the foreman supervises them. The same rule applies to
Sunday School. Therefore, give each of your class members a prospect to contact,
then check up on them the following Sunday to see if they have made the contact.
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4. Phone Every Prospect. During the campaign, phone every prospect on your list ...
every week. Extend to each a friendly welcome, giving the time, place and lesson topic.
5. Send Mail to Every Prospect. During your campaign, mail every prospect a
postcard or letter, inviting him to Sunday School. A housewife can write a personal note
to 30 prospective students in 2 hours. A first-class letter to 30 prospects costs less than
$12 – eternal benefits will result.
6. Visit Every Prospect. Visitation puts the GO in Gospel, carrying the message to
every person. After you have phoned every prospect, a visit to his home will convince
him of your love. In fact, visit every prospect every week during your attendance
campaign.
7. Start a Class Newspaper. During your campaign, start a one-page (or larger) class
newspaper. The junior class at one church in Guelph, Ontario, distributes an eight-page
paper, The Roadrunner, to every junior. Since it is a large class, the teachers spend
time writing articles about juniors who recently have committed their lives to Jesus
Christ. The paper also includes crossword puzzles, homework, stories, and news about
the attendance campaign. The attendance motto and logo also are printed there,
reminding the kids of their attendance goals.
The average Sunday School teacher with less than 10 pupils cannot publish a
newspaper every week, but he can do it at least twice during each attendance
campaign. A newspaper is not hard to prepare. If you’ve never issued one, simply write
a one-page letter giving the news of the class. Then type the letter in two columns to
make it look like a newspaper, and put a headline across the top. Fill the newspaper
with the names of students, their accomplishments, and what you expect to do for God.
8. Name Your Class. One teacher called his fourth grade boys class “The Treehouse
Gang.” A massive cardboard tree, with a door, was used at the entrance of the room.
Two more large trees, reaching from ceiling to floor, covered the inside walls. Later, a
stockade was put in the hall surrounding the doors. He started his class in September.
His goal was to average 54 before the year was out. With enthusiasm, ingenuity, and
determination, he pushed the average attendance to 94.
9. Post Attendance. A junior boys class at one place in Hammond, Ind., called their
campaign “Spring Training.” A massive box score chart marked hits, runs and errors so
that students could follow their progress each week. The class was divided into two
sides, and at the beginning of each class they “batted around,” adding up visitors,
attendance and Bibles.
Since pupils tend to value those things that are important to teachers, make sure
to call the roll carefully. This tells each student it’s his duty to be in class every Sunday.
The extra pressure of some kind of a wall chart gives added motivation.
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10. Get a Motto. One high school class in Savannah, Ga., had a “Fat is Beautiful”
campaign. Instead of awarding stars or rockets, or putting names on the wall, they
weighed in each week. The teams began with an equal total weight. Visitors tipped the
scales for the winners, while absentees dragged the losers down.
11. Get a Logo. A church that celebrated its 25th anniversary hung a huge silver seal
all year in the auditorium with the motto, “The 25th Year of Redemption.” Under the
motto was their goal. The entire seal was their logo. They had it fashioned into small
silver seals which they affixed to envelopes and letterheads. It was also printed on all
the literature of the church.
12. Give Out Buttons. Each person is to be given a button ahead of time with the
wording “I Am One of **” to remind him to be faithful in attendance. (** the number
chosen as the goal.)
13. Stretch Their Faith. One large group in West Hollywood, Fla., planned to beat
the state record and have the largest Sunday School in the history of Florida. To do so,
attendance had to double from 2,700 to 6,400. In a three-day workers conference, their
faith was stretched.
On the first night of the conference, everyone was pinned with a “5,000+” button
and asked to pray for 5,000+ every time he ate a meal during the next week. Since
most eat three meals a day, every person would pray 21 times for 5,000+. It was called,
“Fast or Pray,” reminding the people that if they didn’t pray for 5,000, they should not
eat.
The second night, each worker signed a card to pledge, “I will work for 5,000+.”
On the third night every teacher made a numerical commitment of a goal for his class
on 5,000+ Sunday.
When the tally was in, they had pledged to reach 5,400. Later they reached
5,427, the largest Sunday School in the history of Florida.
14. Choose a Good Day. Don’t plan a Sunday School campaign for Labor Day
weekend, or during the Fourth of July holiday when there is a natural dip in the
attendance. The minister who tried to have his largest attendance on Labor Day
weekend and the Sunday after Easter, claiming, “Anybody can get a crowd on Easter, I
want to build an attendance to show our people love God,” has missed the whole
purpose of an attendance campaign. A high attendance should do more than
demonstrate the loyalty of the faithful. It should bring visitors, electrify everyone when
the attendance is doubled, and bring men, women and children to a saving faith in
Jesus Christ. So plan for Sunday School growth when the best results are possible.
Then you will be a good steward of your time, energy and money. Therefore, plan to
grow on those days when attendance can be largest.
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15. Remember the Clenched Fist. A man can keep his fist taut only so long. Then
the muscles give out. Likewise, a Sunday School class can pressure itself for
expansion for only a short time. Therefore, growing Sunday Schools plan two
attendance campaigns for six or seven weeks each spring and fall. They work as hard
as they can during a campaign to find prospects, excite students, phone, write and visit.
The attendance drive is relaxed during holidays, the snows of January, and again during
the summer.
16. Get a Running Start. Before jumping a creek, a boy runs faster if he has to jump
farther. In Sunday School, the larger the goal, the longer it takes to double your class
attendance. Plan a six or seven week fall campaign with the high Sunday as the last
day. Don’t read this chapter and plan to double your class next week. Pray to double,
plan to double, and promote to double. But remember this: A teacher can’t lead if his
class won’t follow, and pupils won’t work to double their class unless their teacher takes
the time to convince them it can be done.
17. Plan a High Day. Plan a high attendance Sunday on the last Sunday of your
campaign. Some criticize this, saying that it only gets a crowd and makes small-class
teaching impossible. However, the “high day” really is only a return to the old-fashioned
rally day, where all pupils assembled in the auditorium to “rally” enthusiasm for Vacation
Bible School. Most teachers need to break lethargy and infuse the pupils with
expectation. A “double day” convinces the pupils it can be done again and again, until
the class is permanently doubled.
18. Pray. A junior boys class in Decatur, Ga., set a goal of 26 in Sunday School.
They wanted to double their average attendance of 13. The teacher asked each boy to
pray. Several boys promised to bring their buddies. Next Sunday morning they began
to fill up the little room ... 22 ... 23 ... 24 ... 25 ... 26. All the boys cheered. But, the
visitors kept coming. Soon they were sitting two to a chair and standing in each row.
When the teacher finally counted all the heads, there were 50.
“I can’t teach. There are too many in this room,” the teacher said apologetically.
A hand went up. “It’s my fault,” said a tow-headed boy, “I prayed for 50.”
God answers the prayer of those who ask for their ministry to be enlarged, but
prayer alone cannot build a Sunday School. God will not do what He has commanded
us to do. We are to go and reach people. Classes grow when teachers are busy visiting,
phoning, mailing and praying all week.
19. Feed Them the Word. People go to restaurants where they get good food, then
they tell their friends. Books are sold by word of mouth. The satisfied customer is still
the best salesman for any product. The basis for growing Sunday School classes is still
good Bible teaching which causes students to bring their friends. The Bible must be
made interesting, captivating and relevant.
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20. Try Super Saturation. The disciples went everywhere preaching the Word,
reaching all men by all means. A Sunday School teacher should use every technique to
excite pupils about coming to Sunday School. Extra promotion, contests, and rewarding
the pupils to show that a teacher cares. Extra preparation, visitation and prayer will get
results. The work of God is still spelled W-0-R-K. Any class will grow in direct
proportion to the energies expended by the teacher.
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Rules For Making Every Visitor Feel Welcome
With our meeting coming up, it’s a good
time to remember . . .
ules for Making Every
visitor Feel Welcome
he Thirty Second Rule
Most guests will make a judgment about us
during the first thirty seconds after they enter the
building. Greet others with a handshake and a
friendly smile as soon as you see them.
he Front-Door-Rule
Help people find their classes or a seat
in the auditorium. If they have
trouble, they may not return.
he Ten-Foot Rule
Greet anyone with whom you are not
familiar who comes within ten feet of
you. Make eye contact. Be friendly.
he Five-Minute Rule
Take the first five minutes after services to seek
out guests and greet them. Encourage them to
return and thank them for being here. After you
have greeted our guests, you will still have
opportunity to talk to your friends.
Our attitude will often determine if visitors
return. Do your part to make sure they really feel
welcome
appreciated
R
T
TTT &
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To Get New Visitors
TO GET NEW VISITORS
Invite all police to a free fellowship dinner. Note for them it is not a religious meeting,
but the church is doing this in their honor.
Then do the same for judges, city officials.
Then Chamber of Commerce, etc., etc.
The church in one town had a bad name from the past and did this program. These
actions totally eliminated the problem.
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each month!
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Your Source to Reach New Families
Moving In Your Areal (812) 372-1663
-1-
What Are First-Time Visitors Looking For?
What Are First-Time Visitors Looking For?
After the first visit, a decision to return is a result of six factors, in this order:
1. The Friendliness and Warmth of the Church
A study found: “When both unchurched and churched people are asked what they look
for in a church, all agree on one factor – the climate of the congregation. They are looking for a
church in which they feel at home, where the people are friendly, and where there is a warm
and comfortable atmosphere.” This attitude is primarily conveyed 1) when visitors first enter the
building, and 2) when the formal service is over and people begin to leave. Help your members
understand the need to approach and welcome anyone they do not recognize, or who appears
to be alone.
2. The Character of the Worship Service
The issues reflecting on the character of the worship are:
Is it authentic? People want to experience the presence of God. They are looking for clarity
and guidance to know what is right, and power to do it.
Does it echo with the notes of grace? People already know they are sinners. They don’t need
to be convinced of that. What they need is affirmation of the reality and depth of God’s love for
them.
Is the worship edifying? Worship is meant to be an uplifting experience that enables people to
leave the service strengthened and equipped for life.
3. A Place for Children
Recent studies show that visitors perceive the needs of their children as a major factor in
a decision to find a church. Baby-boomers (born between 1946-1964) include one-third of all
Americans. Churches that provide opportunities for children will be effective in attracting these
people.
4. The Adult Program
One way to involve unchurched adults is to offer involvement opportunities in which they
can participate. Athletic events, classes, musical or fitness groups, social gatherings can be
designed to include unchurched people.
5. The Church Building
Your location and structure are fixed and, thus, not a factor you can change in your
visitor attraction strategy. True? Only partially. It’s important to know what it is about your
facility that attracts or deters visitors. Four key questions are: Is your church visible? Is your
church accessible? What is the condition of your property? Do you have adequate space?
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Why Visitors Return
Churches that do well in seeing newcomers return have certain common qualities:
1. A Positive Identity and Self Image
A positive self-image means that members have good feelings about their
congregation. A positive identity means that members believe their church is special
and they have something unique to offer. These characteristics have much to do with
desire and ability to reach out.
2. Congregational Harmony
Churches equipped for growth are unified. There are no major conflicts in the
church, there is an essential agreement about the style and ministry of the
congregation, and the people love and care for one another.
3. Minister Enthusiasm
Congregations equipped for growth have enthusiastic ministers who believe in
the potential of the church. These men are full of hope and inspire confidence in the
members. A key part of this is energetic and enthusiastic worship leadership.
4. Ministry in the Community
Congregations attracting visitors nearly always have specific ministry in the
community. This community ministry authenticates and affirms the church’s message of
love. The ministry helps people believe the word proclaimed and makes invitations from
the congregation more readily accepted.
5. Small Group Opportunities
Congregations keeping visitors have various small group opportunities which
serve as entry points. These small groups allow people to become friends, and to
deepen relationships. They represent a variety of interests and activities to which
people can be invited.
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How To Attract First-Time Visitors
How to Attract First-Time Visitors
(People select a church only after first visiting. Thus, an effective growth strategy must
include 1) attracting, and 2) retaining visitors. Much of this issue is taken from the new
book – Attracting New Members – by Robert Bast. The book is a helpful resource in
developing an effective visitor strategy.)
Here are three suggestions for seeing your first-time visitor rate increase,
presented in the way they might be experienced by a non-churched person, but in the
reverse order of importance and effectiveness.
Step One: Advertising
A congregation serious about growth will spend a minimum of five percent of its
budget on advertising. Here are areas that might be included:
1. The Yellow Pages
This will be effective in reaching new residents looking for a church. Market
research indicates people under age 40 use the Yellow Pages frequently. Take as
large an ad as possible, and include both your advertising theme and a brief reference
to several specific ministries in your congregation.
2. Mailings
Mailing effectiveness grows with a) the frequency of your mailings (plan a
minimum of six); b) the focus of your mailings (the more specific your target group, the
better the results). Try this:
• January – An introductory letter of greeting with a well-designed brochure introducing
the church.
• March – Send an invitation to a special seminar or workshop beneficial to members
and non-members.
• April – A letter of invitation to a “Inquirer’s Class” mailed the week before a quarter of
study begins.
• July – An invitation to a church social event. Perhaps ice cream sundaes on the
church lawn. Information about Bible Study groups is included.
• Early September – An invitation to church following summer vacation, with a brochure
on educational opportunities, classes, and other events in the fall.
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• October or November – A mailing inviting people to the fall seminar, plus a new
brochure on the church.
3. Newspaper Advertising
Advertising designed to reach the unchurched should run in the section of the
paper most likely to be read by the people to whom the message is addressed, but not
in the religious section.
4. Radio and Television Advertising
Churches should be particularly conscious of the opportunity to communicate
their message, and should develop a planned advertising program to take advantage of
the openness of people to a spiritual message in these difficult times.
Step Two: Programming
If the question is, ‘What do we advertise?” the answer is, “our church’s program.”
A church program is most attractive when:
a) it provides for all age groups; b) it is broadly based; c) it is of high quality; d) it is
specifically and intentionally designed to reach the unchurched; e) it is specifically
directed to your target audience.
Programs are developed as people-needs are identified. In a church I formerly
served, we became aware that four members of the congregation were all battling
cancer. Out of the experience of those cancer patients and their families came a
decision to form a cancer support group as a ministry to the community.
Step Three: Inviting
By far the most important aspect of a congregation’s ability to attract new
members is the degree to which members invite others. Between 75-90% of all adults
who choose a congregation are first brought by a friend or relative. There is no more
effective method of church growth than the personal invitations extended by church
members.
Lyle Schaller notes: “The congregations in which members invite others to come
to church with them usually display these characteristics: a) the members are
enthusiastic about their faith as Christians, b) the members are enthusiastic about this
congregation, c) the members are enthusiastic about the current preacher, d) the
congregation as a whole conveys the expectation that members will invite others to
come to church with them, e) most of the members actively and enthusiastically greet
and welcome visitors, and f) that particular program or, if it is on Sunday morning, that
worship experience is planned on the assumption that first-time visitors will be present.
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This means minimizing references to last week, to congregational problems, to
administrative concerns or to ‘in house’ jokes that leave the stranger mystified.”
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Seeing Your Visitors Return
Seeing Your Visitors Return
The welcome you extend to visitors will greatly influence whether they come
back. You don’t have a second chance for a first impression. Here are some
suggestions to improve your visitor welcome and follow-up strategy:
1. Change the name. Drop the word “greeters;” begin using the word “hosts.”
The implications of the term will help those who welcome newcomers realize that their
responsibility does not begin and end with a smile and a handshake. A “host” is
responsible for seeing that “guests” are taken care of from the time they arrive until the
time they leave. This doesn’t mean hosts must be with the visitor constantly. But like
any good host, they are concerned that guests are welcome, meet others and enjoy the
experience.
2. Increase the number of people who say “welcome.” Consider positioning
“hosts” in the following places:
• Parking lot. Responsibilities include helping persons find the main entrance,
distributing a well-marked floor plan of the church/educational facilities, assisting
parents with children, distributing umbrellas on rainy days, etc.
• Portico. If your church has a place for unloading people in inclement weather, or
where attenders regularly unload before parking, several “hosts” should be stationed
there.
• Doors. Every door that people may enter should be “hosted.” The primary
responsibility of these hosts is to identify persons who are new or visiting. The host
should escort the guests to the welcome center, and introduce them to the “welcome
center hosts.” (Therefore, you will need more than one host at each door.)
• Welcome Center. Most churches would do well to designate a centrally located area
of the church as a “welcome center.” Put up an attractive sign and decorate the center
appropriately. Welcome center hosts should mingle nearby. When anyone (host or
member) brings a visitor to the center, welcome center hosts should be available to
“adopt” the person/s for the rest of their visit. The host/s should offer to sit with the
guests in the service, escort them and/or their children to an appropriate class, and
introduce them to other members in the church before and after the service.
• Classes. Every adult and children’s class should have several hosts. Class hosts
should watch for visitors, “adopt” them for the remainder of the class, introduce them to
others, sit with them. If the visitor has not been to the welcome center he/she should be
escorted there.
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• After Church. Newcomers’ opinions about the “friendliness” of the church will be most
influenced by what occurs after the service. “After Church Hosts” are primarily
concerned with looking for persons following the service who seem to be alone and/or
new. The guests should be engaged in conversation, introduced to others with similar
interests or ages, and “adopted” until they are either introduced to someone else, or
leave for the parking lot.
A helpful guide every church host should read is How to Help Your Greeters
Extend a Warm & Caring Welcome.
3. Follow-up the visit within 48 hours. Several studies have documented that
visitor-return rate is influenced by the length of time between the church visit and the
follow-up contact from the church. Ideally, the contact is Sunday afternoon; Monday is
next best, Tuesday next. After the first 48 hours, return rates drop drastically.
4. The goal of the follow-up contact is to see the visitor return. The average
“affiliation rate” of a first-time visitor in American churches is 12-15%. (That is, 12-15%
of all first-time visitors typically join that church in the following year.) Even growing
churches average only 25% affiliation of first time visitors. But the average affiliation
rate for second time visitors jumps to 40-45%. And third-time visitors is 60-75%!
Follow-up contacts should have only one goal: get the person back the following
week. Many visitor follow-up programs see the follow-up call as evangelistic. (More
often, this “hidden agenda” works against the visitor ever returning!) Ideally the followup
contact involves the welcome center host who spent the most time with the guest the
previous Sunday. The host should offer to meet the person or family at church at a predetermined
time and place.
5. Seek to move the visitor from an “entry point” to an “entry path.” Most
people eventually decide to join a church because of friends and relationships
established. It is important, therefore, to help these persons find a group in which they
can begin to build such relationships. A social group, class, home Bible study, sports
team, etc. is the best way to see this happen. The original welcome center host should
be familiar with the opportunities for involvement in the church, and seek to find an
appropriate place for the newcomer to fit in.
Increase Your “Visitor Staying Power”
You don’t have a second chance for a first impression. When it comes to visitors, do it
right the first time. Here are some suggestions . . .
1. Do away with the greeter at the door impersonally shaking hands with everyone who
enters. In most cases it’s ineffective and could be the worst first impression your church
could make.
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2. Enlarge your visitor reception group to 10, 20, 30 greeters in the foyer. When a
visiting young couple arrives, a young greeter couple will meet them, welcome them,
accompany them to the auditorium, sit with them, assist them as needed with the
worship service and at the benediction, take them to the coffee table and introduce
them to others, especially of the same general age and interest. The greeters should
note information on the visitors and send it to the office for later reference. This
friendship-building initiative will be a major factor in seeing visitors return in greater
numbers. A similar procedure should be applied to youth greeters, older adults, etc.
3. Why don’t you and the preacher welcome visitors for 15 minutes before the morning
service? You will begin the communication process person-to-person, you will be able
to introduce visitors by name and tell something of interest about each. Your visitors
will be very impressed... as will your members, by your example.
4. Build your visitor flow by recognizing members who bring visitors. Try this. During
the announcements: “If you brought a guest, would you stand and introduce them?”
What impact does this have on members? Sunday after Sunday it reinforces and
rewards those who bring visitors. The result? More and more guests/visitors.
Seeing Visitors Return
The sooner a personal call is made on visitors, the better the results. Sunday afternoon
is better than Wednesday. Monday better than Thursday. A first call made by members
produces better results than a first call by a preacher.
Why? Because calls made by members are viewed as being “personal”: calls by a
minister are often viewed as “institutional,” he’s paid to do It.”) When you do make an
“institutional” response, preacher. make it as personal as possible. Send a follow-up
letter after your visit. And, make it personal. (Use your new word processor!)
Why not send with your personal letter an enclosed. self-addressed card, asking for
their response to the service (like the cards you often see in restaurants and hotels that
care about their patrons’ opinions). This could start the involvement process, as well as
providing you with valuable information.
The purpose of your first visit – a return visit by the prospects. The first call (by
members or minister) is to build friendships, to listen, to assess needs, interests,
Christian commitment (if any), family, and other significant facts. It’s an informal
entrance inter-view. With this information, additional support and resources should be
focused to see visitors move from the “outside” to the “inside.” See that the name gets
to 4-5 appropriate people in the church for subsequent invitations to various
church/social events.
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Who Are Your Best Visitor Prospects?
Many churches go out of their way to make the first-time visitor feel welcome and at
home. Often they are given a special information packet, visitor ribbon, and may be
asked to stand in the service.
However do you know who your second-time visitors are? Third-time? The fact is that
those who return to your church a second time are much more receptive to uniting with
your church than first-timers. And third-time visitors more open than second-timers.
What an you doing with your return visitors? They should receive as much or more
attention, follow-up, and concern as the first-time attender. Your strategy should include
such things as personal visits during the week from one or more person(s) with areas in
common; a second, different letter from the church thanking the person for coming back
again and perhaps explaining how a person can become more involved in the life of the
church.
Third-time visitors are indicating by their presence that they are seriously interested in
your church. Again, a unique system of responding to these people is called for.
If your congregation is making a good first impression, be sure to follow up that second
visit with an equally good impression.
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Predicting Your Church Growth Or Decline By Visitors
Predicting Your Church Growth or Decline by Visitors
You can predict your church’s future growth pattern through your visitors. Few visitors -
little growth; many visitors - much growth. Here’s why:
You can expect to lose between 5-11% of your members each year; I-2% through
death, 2-3% through transfer-out, 2-6% through reversion. (Variables include age of
congregation, location, size of church, effectiveness of incorporation, etc.) Analyze your
own records for your average yearly losses in each category. Growth takes place only
after losses are recovered. Example: a church with a membership of 750 could average
a yearly loss of 75 members. They need 75 new members just to remain even. How
many visitors would such a church need to grow?
The data from our computers – we are monitoring several hundred churches – indicate
that the typical church sees 12%-15% of its visitors saved. This church must attract
approximately 550 visitors in one year just to begin to grow; or approximately 11 visitors
per Sunday who live in the church’s ministry area. (We are helping churches improve
this number dramatically through the application of appropriate growth strategies.)
To project your next year’s growth/decline first, identify your expected loss from death,
transfer-out, and reversion (based on your previous five years), second, determine the
percentage of first-time visitors that actually are converted within 2-10 months; third,
calculate the number of visitors you need to a) make up for expected losses, and b)
grow beyond that point; fourth, determine the number of visitors you are presently
attracting and compare this figure to step three. If it is less, expect a loss at the end of
the year; if greater – growth.
To realize new growth through visitors a church has two options . . . first, increase the
number of visitors per Sunday, second, increase the percentage of visitors who are
converted. Both require a specific strategy, the second requires an “incorporation”
strategy, the first calls for an “outreach” strategy.
You Don’t Have a Second Chance . . . for a First Impression
A “visitor strategy” for your church will address two basic issues: 1) how to attract
visitors, and 2) how to make them feel welcome. The first impressions you give in both
areas are very important in seeing visitors eventually become members.
ATTRACTING VISITORS
Most people will have some mental images of your church even before they attend.
This will come through a) acquaintances and word of mouth, b) drive-by appearance,
and/or c) church advertising. Hopefully “a” will occur, and be positive; “b” is also
important; but “c” is the area most churches overlook.
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A creative advertising strategy is so easy . . . yet so seldom done. This, in spite of the
fact that within a year an effective advertising strategy will substantially increase your
“visitor flow.” Gather four to five creative, “unemployed” ones to serve on a community
relations committee this Fall. Their areas of responsibility should be:
Mailings sent once every three months to areas in your community populated by
persons who closely reflect the characteristics of your present members, since these
people will feel most “at home” when they visit. In each mailing highlight an upcoming
church event of interest to non-members. (Worship services usually aren’t.) Early
September, mid-December, mid-spring, and early summer are the best times to mail.
Provide a way for persons to take a small, non-threatening step to express interest such
as requesting an appropriate free gift (such as a tract on the family), returning an
interest reply card, calling for more information, receiving the church newsletter, etc.
Newspaper ads that are creatively written and visualized will place your church a step
above the ordinary in the eyes of prospective visitors. An effective ad will a) get the
attention of the reader, b) turn their attention to interest with a transition to a felt need, c)
move from interest to stimulating desire, by showing how participating in church
activities responds to their particular felt need, d) encourage the reader to take specific
action, e) and communicate in a language familiar to the unchurched.
Unfortunately, advertising won’t grow your church. It will increase the number of
visitors; it will raise the self-esteem of members, but it won’t cause people to be
converted in record numbers. That’s where the second strategy comes in . . .
MAKING VISITORS FEEL WELCOME
Research indicates that the #1 reason people select a certain church is “they felt a
sense of belonging.” They felt important, wanted, loved. What first impressions do the
new visitors have of your church – once they arrive?
Realize that visitors, even old time church-goers, feel anxiety about going to a strange
church the first few times. You can help them got over this anxiety in two ways:
Formal Welcome. Growing numbers of churches are realizing the value of placing their
“first line” greeters in the church parking lot! It’s a good idea. For the visitor even
knowing where to go once he/she gets out of the car can be a question. Develop a
visitor “visitor package” to be given to visitors while they’re still in the parking lot,
including an easy-to-follow map of the facilities. Parking lot greeters should escort the
visitors to the entrance of the church where they are personally introduced to the
“second line” of greeters. Your greeter system should respond to all first, second, and
third-time visitors.
Informal Welcome. While your formal welcome strategy is important, the informal
welcome ultimately has the greatest influence on a person’s eventual decision to be
saved even come back. It is when members go out of their way to express genuine
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interest in the newcomer ... when members are inviting them to a get-together of friends
from the church . . . when they are remembered the next time they visit. According to
our recent “love quotient” research, growing churches measured significantly higher on
the “love expressed to visitors” than did declining churches. This “informal welcome” is
more difficult to plan for, but it can be done, and your informal welcome can be
improved!
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How To Have A Church Attendance Drive
HOW TO HAVE A CHURCH ATTENDANCE DRIVE
1. Ask each one in the congregation to attend for 8 weeks before the “attendance day.”
2. Have cards with places to check as follows: I will attend every time; I will ask people to
come. Then see who doesn’t sign a card; pray for them and go talk to them and ask if they will
be there. “Do you promise? Are you sure? O.K., sign here” (on the card).
3. Timing is important, especially if the church is tired. Find an excellent time for that church.
4. Provoke (motivate) to love and good works. The next verse (in Heb.) is about attendance.
5. Build up the importance of attendance. Get those attending to exhort the ones not attending.
6. Get all of God’s people there; then you can conscientiously ask everyone else.
7. Plan every detail of your drive; don’t fail to plan.
8. Have various ones in charge of the various activities, especially if the organizer is trying to do it
“all.”
9. Use everything
10. Go all the way; stick your neck out; put it in the paper; tell everyone; burn your bridges; pulpit
promotion, radio, tv, printing, mail, newsletter, bulletin boards, bumper stickers. Make every
member a messenger. Use whatever way you can to get the word out.
you have in the church to promote it.
11. The more advertising you do, the easier it is for people to talk to others about it.
12. Teach lessons on the campaign before you have it: Why have it? What each can do. What it
will result in. What we do afterwards. Promote it.
13. Teachers receive a note in every class every time that they meet to promote it for all 8 weeks.
14. Use the organized visitation groups to visit everyone who has ever visited services (you should
have kept records), or in any other way has a connection with the congregation (must be
organized).
15. (If applicable) use the bus and have bus riders bring their parents and friends.
16. The preacher(s) (elders) must visit “part-timers” to get everyone to come.
17. Set goals for yourself (the coordinator of the drive). Invite 50-100. Don’t
18. Don’t just visit; go soul seeking.
set goals for others.
19. Get 40% more promises than you actually want to have there. Many will not keep their word,
even when they signed a card.
20. Have every age class and every sermon (a.m. and p.m.) all on a theme that’s in harmony with the
idea chosen for the attendance day (don’t be repetitious).
21. Have the theme of the campaign taught in every Bible class for most, if not all of a quarter
(example: “Jesus Cares” or “The Church in the World”).
22. When the day arrives, make it really valuable
23. Many times it is good to have a “pot luck” or some other kind of meal after the worship.
; have something really special for them. Think
“non-member.” Many times this would probably involve an “outside” speaker.
24. If possible, organize a way that every visitor is invited back the next week by someone who will
also take them to lunch afterward.
25. The program needs to be organized so that everyone is given a job and is able to do it. Follow up
on the first card filled out (#2 above) with another on “what do you want to do?”
26. This program must be coordinated with a planned follow-up program ready to go immediately the
following day.
Incorporate / Assimilate
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Incorporating And Assimilating Your Newcomers
Incorporating and Assimilating Your Newcomers
Dr. Bill Sullivan
In my experiences of church growth, I have found it helpful to distinguish between two
events relating to a new person’s integration into the fellowship of a local church –
incorporation and assimilation. Traditionally these words have been used
interchangeably. Actually, they are two very different aspects of the new person’s
integration process, both of which need careful attention.
“Incorporation:” “the process of helping newcomers feel socially comfortable with the
church – its people, programs, and facilities. “Incorporation” is very critical to making
disciples. Contrary to what many church leaders believe, “incorporation” actually takes
place at the front end of the evangelism process. When newcomers feel socially
comfortable with church members they will listen to the message of the church and its
people. If social comfort is low or non-existent, participation in church related activities
is also low or non-existent. A first-time visitor who attends your worship or small group
is unfamiliar with the context and unacquainted with your members. Such a situation
naturally creates social discomfort. If that discomfort remains at the conclusion of the
first contact, the likelihood of your newcomer returning drops markedly. If, however, the
social discomfort is gone by the end of the meeting, the chances of this person returning
go up dramatically. Remember, you never have a second chance for a first impression!
A church that recognizes this and organizes to overcome the tendency toward social
discomfort of newcomers will be much more effective in seeing them eventually
involved.
“Assimilation:” the process of helping newcomers feel cognitively assured that they are
an accepted, trusted member of the fellowship. While social involvement comes early in
evangelism, assimilation follows later. The final test of inclusion into the fellowship is
trust. Many have dropped out, not because they weren’t socially incorporated, but
because psychologically they felt rebuffed. Church leaders did not trust them to chair a
committee, or to give an opinion on intensely internal matters of the church. No amount
of social involvement can overcome the rejection felt by one who believes he or she is
not trusted. Conversely, the new church member who feels genuinely trusted and
sought-after feels a sense of oneness and integration with the church.
Examine your church’s effectiveness in welcoming newcomers. And look at both your
incorporation strategy and your assimilation strategy.
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Improving Your Member Incorporation Strategy
Improving Your Member Incorporation Strategy
Here are some thought-starters for how to see new members become active members:
● Develop a special new members’ course for your church. Have recent new members
help, since they know better than anyone the unique needs of the newcomer.
● Monitor the critical involvement indicators of your new members – worship, Sunday
School, small groups, giving – for the first six months. 85% of those who become
inactive do so in the first six months of their membership.
● Plan special events designed to build relationships between new members. (Roller
skating, a baseball game, pizza, a theatrical play, etc.)
● If you have a “sponsor program” that matches new and old members, plan with
sponsors to discuss ways to improve the strategy.
● Develop a “job description” for each role in your church. Include a review of these
ministry opportunities in every New Members Class.
● Invite one person per week (representing a particular ministry area in the church) to
speak to the New Members Class and describe what they do and how a new person
could become involved.
● Give each new member 3-5 names of members in the church (unknown by the new
member) with the assignment of finding those persons and completing a “personal
profile” on each for the next meeting.
● Have a new member video presentation on the church’s various ministries. Update
the presentation each quarter with the next class of new members.
● Have a “one-year old” birthday recognition each quarter during worship to honor
members who have been in the church for one year. Make sure they are aware of it
ahead of time.
● If your church uses plastic name tags, print the name tag in different colors
representing the longevity of the member (red: less than one year; blue: 1-4 years;
white: 5-10 years; green: 10-25 years; silver: 25-40 years; gold: 40 + years). Have a
special ceremony to present “graduates” in each category with their new colored pins.
● Personally interview every new member baptized in the last two years. Ask how the
church could improve their new member orientation from these people who are best
equipped to tell you.
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The Characteristics Of An Incorporated Member
The Characteristics of an “Incorporated Member”
Here are eight characteristics every new member should have by the conclusion of your
new members class:
1) Each new member should be able to list at least seven new friends they have
made in the church. (These friendships could be, and often are, with fellow new
members.)
2) Each new member should be able to identify their spiritual talents.
3) Each new member should be involved in at least one (preferably several) roles/
tasks/ministries in the church, appropriate to his/her spiritual talents.
4) Each new member should be actively involved in a small fellowship (face-to-face)
group. Many churches keep their new members groups together.
5) Each new member should be demonstrating a regular financial commitment to
the church.
6) Each new member should personally understand and identify with the goals of
the church.
7) Each new member should be exhibiting a regular pattern of worship attendance.
8) Each new member should have identified his/her unchurched friends and
relatives and be taking specific steps to help them toward responsible church
membership.
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The New Member Class
The New Member Class
Look at the orientation process of your new members. Are you addressing the issues
that will result in their becoming active, responsible members? Most churches aren’t!
COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT THE NEW MEMBER’S CLASS . . .
MISCONCEPTION: New member orientation should focus on grounding members in
the faith, on Bible study, on spiritual growth, the meaning of baptism and the Lord’s
supper, and church doctrine.
Comment: The most important goals for your new member program should be 1)
building strong relationships with other members, and 2) involvement in a meaningful
role or ministry in the church.
Don’t confuse the purpose of a new believer’s class with a new member’s class. One
class cannot accomplish both aims. A new believer who is also a new member should
be in both groups.
MISCONCEPTION: Once a person leaves the new member’s class he/she should
become part of a Sunday School class or other group.
Comment: If your strategy for integrating new members into groups and classes means
integrating them into existing groups and classes, it may fail. If a group or class has
been together for over two years, new members will generally not find a home there.
Regularly start new groups and classes for new members. If you don’t believe it, try a
new group for new members sometime and watch what happens.
MISCONCEPTION: One new member’s class per year is adequate.
Comment: The first six months of a new member’s life in the church are critical. If the
person is not “incorporated” by the end of six months, they probably never will be. One
class a year overlooks 75% of the new members at the very point they need help the
most. Plan on a new members class at least four times per year. Some “superchurches”
are so aware of this necessity, they start a new member’s class each week!
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Visitation Program
Barnabas Program
(The Barnabas Program Developed By Larry Pasley. Use It To The Glory Of God.)
BARNABAS PROGRAM
Barnabas Means “Son Of Encouragement” And This Program Is Designed To Build-Up
Anyone In The Congregation Who Might Need Encouragement.
THOSE INCLUDED MIGHT BE:
I. Those Not Attending At All.
A. Send a copy of the bulletin each week.
B. Send them a note or card each month saying we miss them.
C. Call or visit them occasionally just to see how they are doing and ask if
they need any help.
II. Those Not Attending Regularly.
A. Send a copy of the bulletin each week they are not here.
B. Let them know they are missed by calling or sending a card when they are
not here.
C. Drop by and visit them occasionally.
Ill. New People Moving Into The Community Who Visit The Congregation.
A. Invite them home with you after the assembly.
B. Offer to help them locate housing.
C. See that they have access to a local paper and map or anything else
which might be useful to them.
IV. Local Visitors To Our Assemblies.
A. Be sure you speak to them and welcome them.
B. Send them a note saying you appreciate their visit and invite them back.
C. Visit them the week of their visit.
V. College Students, Singles.
A. Adopt-a-student.
B. Involve them in working with the teens.
C. Make them feel like they are a part of the body.
VI. Those Who Are Facing Peculiar Problems In Their Life.
A. The sick.
1. Visit the sick (hospital and home).
2. Take food to the sick (at home).
B. The bereaved at the death of a loved one. Be sure they receive cards,
calls and visits occasionally for at least six months after the death.
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C. Shut-ins or those in nursing homes.
1. Be sure they receive regular cards, visits, phone calls, small gifts,
etc.
2. Offer to bring them tapes of the sermons if they would like.
D. Anyone with an obvious problem with children, mate, job, money, etc.
1. Be observant and seek out those who may have problems.
2. Share books, videos and other help available in our library or
elsewhere. Be a friend to them.
VII. New Members.
A. New Christian class - First Steps In Faith
1. Have different couples teach each lesson. (One couple would
teach the same lesson each time.)
by Clayton Pepper.
2. The new converts go to a different home each week (or month,
etc.) and are taught a first principle lesson and get to know a family
in the congregation.
B. Get them involved as soon as possible.
1. Have them fill out a form indicating what programs in which they
would like to work.
2. Encourage them to attend social functions
3. Have Bible school teachers encourage each family member to
attend.
VIII. Membership Involvement - Getting To Know One Another.
A. Look over the member list and make a decision to get to know someone
who you do not recognize or know very well.
B. Begin A “Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner” Program.
1. Everyone who signs up for the program alternate going to
someone’s house for dinner or having someone over for dinner.
2. The host is only told how many will be coming to dinner not who it
will be.
C. Begin a monthly men’s supper (at the building) or men’s night out (at a
restaurant).
D. Begin a monthly ladies’ night out.
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A BARNABAS PROGRAM
I want to be involved in the Barnabas Program. I will help in the following way(s).
NAME
I. THOSE NOT ATTENDING AT ALL.
Mail Bulletins To Those Not In Attendance At All.
Send Monthly Notes Or Cards To Those Not Attending At All.
Call Or Visit Those Not Attending At All.
II. THOSE NOT ATTENDING REGULARLY.
Mail Bulletins To Those Not Attending Regularly.
Send Monthly Notes Or Cards To Those Not Attending Regularly.
Call Or Visit Those Not Attending At All.
Ill. NEW PEOPLE IN COMMUNITY WHO VISIT THE CONGREGATION.
Invite Visitors Moving To Our Community For A Meal After The Assembly.
Provide Local Paper, Map, And Help Locate Housing For Newcommers.
Take Newcomers Packets To Those Visitors Who Have Moved Here.
Make A Point To Seek Out And Speak To All Visitors At The Assemblies.
IV. LOCAL VISITORS TO OUR ASSEMBLIES.
Send Notes Or Cards To Local Visitors.
Visit Local Visitors The Week Of Their Visit.
V. ADOPT A STUDENT OR SINGLE PERSON.
Adopt A Student Or Single Person.
VI. THOSE FACING PECULIAR PROBLEMS IN LIFE.
A. Sick.
Visit The Sick (Hospital And Home).
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Take Food To The Sick (At Home).
B. Bereaved.
Visit Those Who Have Lost A Loved One. Weekly For Six Months.
C. Shut-ins and Nursing Homes.
Visit Shut-ins And Nursing Home Residents Regularly.
Send Cards Or Notes To Shut-Ins And Nursing Home Residents.
Take Tapes Of Sermons To Shut-Ins And Nursing Home Residents.
D. Counseling Needs.
Be Available For Counseling Those With Child Rearing Difficulties.
Be Available For Counseling Those With Marital Difficulties.
Be Available For Counseling Those With Job Related Problems.
Be Available For Counseling Those With Money Related Problems.
VII. NEW MEMBERS.
Teach A First Steps In Faith Lesson, In My Home, To New Christians.
See That All Newcomers And New Christians Fill Out Involvement Form.
VIII. MEMBERSHIP INVOLVEMENT - GETTING TO KNOW ONE ANOTHER.
Make A Point To Get To Know Someone New Each Month.
Join The “Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner” Program.
Cook For The Men’s Supper.
Participate In The Men’s Supper.
Participate In The Ladies’ Night Out Program.
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A Fellowship Group Approach To The Accomplishment Of The Lord’s Work
A FELLOWSHIP GROUP APPROACH
TO THE ACCOMPLISHMENT OF THE LORD’S WORK
I. Goals:
A. To PROVIDE PLEASANT FELLOWSHIP FOR ALL MEMBERS. There is
a great need to provide meaningful fellowship for each new member, all
weak members, and anyone else, who because of temporary
circumstances might be discouraged. Even those who are strong
spiritually need to have fellowship with brethren in order to love their
brother and be ready to assist him.
B. TO EXPEDITE AN EFFECTIVE VISITATION PROGRAM WHICH WILL
BE PLEASANT, PRODUCTIVE, AND EFFICIENT. There is a constant
need for visitation for a variety of reasons. Newcomers to town are often
“looking for a church.” Visitors to our services are favorably impressed by
someone showing special interest in them by paying a short visit to them
to invite them back. Out of duty members need to be checked on
occasionally to see if something might be done to reclaim them. Home
Bible Study Prospects need to be checked out. Others, currently studying
in a Home Bible Study series, need to be visited to increase the chance of
their obeying the gospel.
C. TO INVOLVE EVERY MEMBER IN SOME IMPORTANT TASK FOR THE
LORD’S WORK. Everyone needs to be important to someone or
something. Every member has at least one talent that is important. Much
talent is hidden because shy members think “someone else in this large
group can do a better job, so I will just sit back and let do it.”
Working through smaller groups this member is more likely to do his part
in order to help his group accomplish meaningful goals. It will be up to
group leaders to make sure every member of his group KNOWS
something that needs to be done that HE CAN DO.
D. TO ACCOMPLISH NEEDED PROJECTS: There are constantly
reoccurring tasks that go unattended to and thus hold back progress
simply because there is a shortage of willing workers. Most of these
projects could be quickly taken care of if assigned to small groups, or if a
group would discuss the need and then pledge itself to the solving of a
problem. Some of these needs fall under the following categories:
1. Youth projects - parties, devotionals, etc.
2. Building repairs - construction.
3. Elderly needs - widows’ needs, widowers’ needs.
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4. Sickness needs.
5. Distribution of tracts or other forms of evangelization.
A GROUP OF 8-10 FAMILIES CAN ACCOMPLISH JUST ABOUT ANY
PROJECT THEY THINK NEEDS TO BE DONE! The deacon in charge of
any given area could turn to the group meeting on a particular week and
ask for their help. Or, if a group thinks a certain project needs to be taken
care of, they could contact the deacon in charge and get his help or O.K.
E. TO HELP NEW MEMBERS GET ACQUAINTED AND QUICKLY
BECOME A PART OF THE WORKING FORCE. New members are often
eager to make new friends in the church and to be a part of the work
force. Often though, it is several months before they get to know more
than a handful of members and even longer before they are involved in
any work. They establish a pattern of being a spectator rather than a
doer. We who are older in the faith are not usually aware of their needs or
interests or talents. Old friends try to drag them back into their company
which is unhealthy for the new convert. Move-in members form poor
impressions of the congregation because they do not know what is being
done and often complain, “They are not as friendly here as where I was.”
This is tragic whenever the newcomer is a weak member.
F. TO CREATE A MEANS FOR QUICKLY RESPONDING TO PEOPLE’S
NEEDS IN TIMES OF SICKNESS, DEATH OR OTHER EMERGENCIES.
G. TO PROMOTE UNDERSTANDING, TRUST AND GREATER CONCERN
FOR OUR BROTHERS. We are our brother’s keeper! We cannot trust
nor love one whom we do not know. Misunderstandings, suspicion, and
unfair surmisings run rampart in a church where members do not know
one another well.
II. A PLAN OF ACTION TO ACCOMPLISH THE ABOVE STATED GOALS:
A. SET UP # FELLOWSHIP GROUPS WITH AN ELDER AND HIS WIFE
OR A DEACON AND HIS WIFE AS THE GROUP LEADERS, THEN:
1. Each Group Leader will choose 3 couples as his helpers. (You will
choose couples upon whom you can depend for help! Group
leaders will explain to these 3 couples only the details of this
program and why it is important that they assist.)
2. After choosing the 3 couples to help, the Group Leaders will select
3 families that need to be worked on. Leaders should select
persons who have something in common with the “worker families”.
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(The ones being worked on are not to find out that they are the
“weak members” of the group.)
3. The rest of the members will then be equally divided among the
groups. Care must be given that no group is a segregated group
either racially, financially, or according to age.
4. Have the fellowship group lists typed up and available to all.
B. EXPLAIN TO THE ENTIRE CONGREGATION SOME OF THE AIMS OR
GOALS OF THE PROGRAM AND URGE STRONGLY THAT ALL
PARTICIPATE. (Goal #2 will not be stressed from the pulpit.)
C. ONLY TWO FELLOWSHIP GROUPS WILL MEET EACH WEEK IN
GROUP LEADERS’ HOMES OR HELPERS’ HOMES. (This will make
each group meet only once every 5-6 weeks.)
1. Pulpit announcements and bulletin announcements will be made
that “Group 1 will meet at the house,
evening at 7:00;” etc.
2. Group Leader or Hostess will personally invite or remind any of the
“weak” members to come for the fellowship. (One of the helper
couples might offer to go by and pick them up.)
3. Group Leaders should check with the office for names of visitors,
new converts not yet assigned to a group, prospects, or others to
be specially invited to attend the meeting.
III. WHAT IS TO BE DONE AT THESE FELLOWSHIP GROUP MEETINGS:
A. THE EMPHASIS IS UPON FELLOWSHIP! Plan games, get-acquainted
sessions, Bar-B-Q or chili supper, ice cream freeze, etc. Plan something
that everyone will look forward to and will want to attend. (The success of
this program will depend upon these meetings being something people will
want to attend rather than attending out of duty.)
B. AFTER THE FUN-TIME, it will be necessary to have a “serious time,” to
make the meeting one that accomplishes important functions. During the
“serious time”:
1. Have a short devotional (10-15 minutes of singing and prayers).
2. Decide upon a group project to be accomplished before the next
meeting (5 weeks away). The Group Leader can have a prepared
list of tasks needing to be performed. Others in the group will
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doubtlessly have ideas as to important chores. Decide upon a
project and a plan of action which includes a date and who is to be
in charge of what. (Group Leaders should try to guide the group to
QUICKLY make their plans for action and not get bogged down in
details or dissension. Group Leaders should encourage projects
that involve every member of the group, especially the weaker
members that need to be important.)
3. Mention the names of those of the group that are absent and urge
all to encourage those missing to be present for the next meeting.
(Stress the fun they missed.)
C. SOMETIME AT THE FIRST MEETING AND THEN AGAIN AS OFTEN AS
NECESSARY, LAY DOWN THE RULE THAT COMPLAINING,
CRITICIZING, AND CONDEMNING IS NOT TO BE ENGAGED IN! These
meetings must not become “gripe sessions,” “gossip sessions,” or
“business meetings.” The only justification for mentioning anything that is
wrong or lacking in the church is to point out a problem that this group can
solve! If it is a problem that cannot be solved by this group, DON’T
BRING IT UP! Also do not let these meetings be used to discuss points
of controversy. Controversial problems will destroy the purpose of these
meetings. In other words, Group Leaders must prevent these meetings
from being seed-beds of any kind of division!!!
IV. FOLLOWING THE MEETING:
A. A written report is to be filed with the office. A short form will be provided.
It will look something like the following:
REPORT FORM
Group #
No. in Attendance
Absentees:
Project Selected:
Visitation Assignment Details
(signed)
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B. As projects are accomplished, pass this on to the office so that each group
can receive its due praise. This will cause each group to take healthy
pride in accomplishment.
C. It is up to the Group Leader to see that projects are accomplished by the
group. (It is better to pick up a small project and accomplish it than a large
one and never get it done.)
D. Group Leaders should get “helper couples” to assist with visitation needs
or other problems involving weaker members of the group. Helpers can
be called upon to get materials projects, work out details surrounding the
current project, or perform any needed task.
E. Group Leaders should discuss with other Group Leaders what they are
planning to do, Fellowship ideas, project ideas, things that worked well in
their last meeting, that did not work well, etc. In other words, help each
other plan more effective fellowship meetings.
F. After 3 meetings of each group (approx. 4 months) an evaluation meeting
will be held of all Group Leaders. They will seek at that time to improve
upon the program through changing the members of each group or
through planning a different type fellowship for the group system.
V. APPARENT ADVANTAGE OF THIS APPROACH.
A. No one person meets more than once every 5 weeks unless he chooses
to attend additional fellowship meetings (new converts, newcomers,
visitors, and guests may wish to use these meetings to get better
acquainted).
B. Work is being accomplished every week (by 2 groups). Thus visitors to
our services can be visited immediately. Any special visits can be made
every week during that week. Any special need can be taken care of by a
group that is meeting that week.
C. It provides a means to equally share the work load among all members.
D. With small groups no one is likely to be forgotten, neglected, or left out,
E. Any one who sees a need for anything can see a way to do something
about it. This program should encourage more good works being thought
up and carried out.
F. Each group should become a force for good and each individual should
become aware of important work that he can do for his Lord’s cause.
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Worship
Editor Warns To Be Careful With The Worship Assembly
Editor warns to be careful with the worship assembly
piritual men and women to the right and left of center in churches of Christ are
concerned about our future. They have never before experienced the amount
and/or kind of turmoil that afflicts so many of our congregations today, and they
are scared as they contemplate what might happen to the Lord’s church.
Some people say that we have already experienced a split in the fellowship and
just need to acknowledge the fact. One person said that he was not as worried about a
split as he was about a shattering of the brotherhood.
While we appreciate the genuine concern so evident in these expressions, we do
not believe that the church has already divided, that it will divide, or that it is going to
shatter. This optimism presumes, of course, that key people on every side of current
controversial issues will demonstrate a high degree of integrity, love and patience as
they work through the differences within a framework of sound biblical teaching.
It appears to us that our unity in the years ahead will depend to a great extent on
whether we are committed to the idea of being careful about what we do in the public
assembly. A consensus concerning what should and should not happen in the public
worship assembly has been a strong unifying factor in churches of Christ throughout the
twentieth century.
Without doubt, the public assembly has unified us as a brotherhood. In spite of
the autonomy of local congregations, the odds have always been strong that on a
vacation or business trip, we could stop at a building designated “Church of Christ” and
find a group of people worshiping in the same way we did back home. We have also
felt secure as we moved from city to city, or nation to nation, that we would find a place
to worship that had a public assembly like the one we had attended ever since we
became Christians. This predictability concerning the public assembly allowed us to
have a sense of brotherhood that transcended social, economic, racial, regional and
national barriers.
Although the flavor of the public assembly might differ from place to place, we
knew that males would lead the worship and that the content of the assembly would
predictably include a capella music, prayers, the Lord’s Supper, a biblical study and the
giving of a financial gift to further the work of the kingdom. Sometimes the singing was
not very good, and sometimes it was beautiful; some studies were better than others,
not to mention the prayers. Regardless of the aesthetic quality of the assembly,
however, the public worship assembly had the effect of unifying the worshipers as they
praised God and remembered the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross.
Because of the strong commitment to a public worship assembly that was
biblical, brothers and sisters who differed on many other ideas found the public
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assembly to be a source of unity in the midst of diversity. Although members disagreed
on a host of other issues, they could praise God in unity with brothers and sisters
determined to maintain the pattern of first-century worship.
We have usually been longsuffering about differences outside the assembly. We
have disagreed about the war question, the marriage-divorce-remarriage issue, politics,
the use of tobacco and alcohol, celebration of Christmas, the rightness or wrongness of
certain forms of entertainment and numerous other outside-the-assembly issues. In the
vast majority of cases, however, these differences involving activities outside the
assembly have not divided the church nor provoked a breaking of fellowship. There
have been heated arguments, and rightfully so, but people still have been willing to lay
differences aside and worship together in the public assembly as brothers and sisters in
Christ.
We have never, to our knowledge, had unanimity concerning whether it was right
or wrong to use instrumental music with religious singing outside the assembly. Some
families permitted this in their home, and others did not; but I never knew of any breakdown
of fellowship because of what happened in the home. Some brides wanted an
organ in their wedding, and others refused even to contemplate such an idea. Some
permitted instrumental music at funeral services, and others absolutely refused it.
Church members evaluated these choices and reached their own conclusions, but
never did these difference cause a breach of fellowship. Why? Because what
happened in the home, at a wedding, or at a funeral was outside the public assembly.
Many of us grew up listening to the Chuck Wagon Gang and the Stamps-Baxter
Quartet. Our people took pride in the fact that some of our own members sang with the
Stamps-Baxter Quartet, even though a piano accompanied that singing. But their
singing was outside the church’s public assembly, so even those who disagreed with
what was happening did not make it a point of fellowship.
In summary, the public worship assembly is critical to our unity as a brotherhood.
It always has been. Because of this. we must be exceedingly careful when we tamper
with it in any way. We are very resilient in churches of Christ when the issues on which
we disagree fall outside the public assembly of the saints. When controversial practices
enter the public assembly, however, everyone is affected; and the possibility for division
and shattering is scary.
Howard Norton
CHRISTIAN CHRONICLE / JANUARY 1993
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Relevant Thoughts On Making Corporate Worship The Time Of Our Lives
Relevant thoughts on making corporate worship the time of our lives
xperiments in corporate worship are widespread today among Protestants,
Catholics and Jews. Present unrest about worship comes, in the first instance,
from misunderstanding the nature of biblical worship. If we misunderstand or
disagree on what worship is, our views will differ on what we ought to be doing in
worship and what steps should be taken to “improve” worship.
Worship stands at the center of the church’s existence. Whatever else the
church does, it worships. Whatever else it is, the church is a worshiping community.
Worship is adoration of God. It remembers and proclaims God’s great acts of
deliverance in the history of his people. At the heart of Christian worship is the Lord’s
Supper, which unites the church in remembering the sacrificial death and resurrection of
Jesus. In partaking of the supper, the church acknowledges and submits to the
presence and rule of the resurrected Lord in the church.
Christian worship is thus God-centered. It is not human-centered, much less
self-centered. True worship subordinates our hearts and minds, our feelings and
concerns, to the reality of God and his claims upon our lives. The fact that worship is
God-centered delivers us from being locked into our own limited thoughts, abilities and
emotions. Further, it delivers us from society’s illusions about reality.
Worship evokes the realization that our trust and confidence cannot be placed in
ourselves or in things we can measure and manage. As Paul says, “Our hope is in God
who raises the dead.” This enables us to see that neither our own intellects, nor our
own efforts, nor our own experiences is of ultimate importance. God-centered worship
delivers us from self-preoccupation.
We must remind ourselves that idolatry is not just the worship of false gods;
idolatry is also the false worship of the true God. Historically, biblical worship has
mutated into false worship in two ways. First, we distort worship when we attempt to
use worship for our own ends. When our worship attempts to manipulate divine power
for personal benefits (e.g., financial, political, etc.), we are worshiping God because he
is useful, not because he is God.
The second way worship may become distorted into idolatry occurs when we
confuse seeking God with seeking the experience of God. Although God is still named,
seeking the experience of God inevitably draws our attention back to ourselves - our
own hearts, our own emotions, our own feelings. This subtle shift of focus happens not
only in our private devotions but also in our corporate worship.
More than 40 years ago, in The Nature and Mission of the Church, Donald Miller
warned:
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“... to evaluate worship by what happens in the experience of the worshiper is to
make men, not God, the center of worship. Worship then becomes a device to use God
for human ends, a tool for manipulating divine power and making God a slave to man.”
Miller continues:
“In modern worship services, too much attention is directed toward what happens
to the worshiper. Devices of sound, lighting and pageantry are frequently utilized to
produce emotional feelings in the worshiper. Those who participate tend to evaluate the
worship service in terms of how it ... gave them a “good feeling,” or “inspired” them. ...
Religious entertainment is often confused with religious worship.
The purpose of worship – the focus of worship – is to give honor and glory to
God. This does not mean that worship does not affect our attitudes, dispositions and
emotions. Certainly worship may evoke a wide range of emotions, including gratitude,
awe, humility, sorrow and joy. But we do not use worship in order to arouse or
manipulate these emotions. Biblical worship does not aim at producing such
experiences.
Everything that evokes these emotions is not worship, nor does the presence of
such emotions validate worship. Again, it is crucial to distinguish between seeking God
and seeking the experience of God.
Pardoxically (sic), it is only when we take our attention off ourselves and when
we are not asking, “What does this do for me? How does this make me feel? Am I
enjoying this?” that we receive the benefits of worship. True worship frees us from our
self-preoccupation by centering our hearts and minds on God. As our worship is
directed toward our Creator, our selfish preoccupations are exposed and our true needs
made clear. In this manner, worship frees us from the gods of the age – from the
modern idols of comfort, success and fun. It frees us from the tyranny of the popular
and fits us for service to the Truth.
Popular attempts to make worship “relevant” should be approached cautiously.
To make worship “relevant” is to adapt it to our own culture, variously described as
media-dominated, entertainment-saturated, pleasure-oriented, self-indulgent and
sensate. To make worship relevant to this culture would require a “worship technology”
– expensive sound and lighting equipment, trained “worship technicians” and special
performers.
Ultimately, it would make “worship” took like a rock concert or a halftime show.
Do we really want worship to provide maximum sensory pleasure, or to be exciting,
entertaining, emotionally intense and personally fulfilling according to contemporary
cultural tastes?
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While it is understandable that, in a self-centered, fun-seeking, media-dominated
society, Christians are confusing religious entertainment with Christian worship, this
hardly makes it less damaging. Christian leaders, under enormous pressure to appear
“open” and “progressive,” need courage to resist the relentless pull of the cultural
undertow. Worship fads and trends reflecting our entertainment-saturated culture and
driven by a growing worship industry may make “praise time” more fun, but they also
trivialize the faith and impoverish the life of discipleship.
MICHAEL R. WEED, Institute for Christian Studies,
CHRISTIAN CHRONICLE /.NOVEMBER 1998
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Six Ways To Increase Your Worship Attendance
Six Ways to Increase Your Worship Attendance
Because the worship service is the most visible activity in the church, and has
the greatest influence on morale and congregational self-esteem, church leaders do
well to focus on positively influencing attendance patterns. Growing worship attendance
says to members, “our faith has answers for today’s world ... and people are coming to
our church to find it!” Growing worship attendance creates a ripple effect that positively
affects other areas of church life, as well.
Assuming your services are well planned and conducted, the following six
suggestions can increase your attendance in the next year ...
1. Monitor attendance and respond to signs of inactivity. One of the easiest
ways to increase worship attendance is to decrease the number who become inactive.
People like to be noticed when they’re absent. A note from the church saying,
“we missed you last Sunday...” will greatly improve attendance patterns. Studies
indicate that when a person misses three Sundays in a row, he/she may be on a drop
out track. When you see a 3-week inactive pattern . . . RESPOND! A phone call or
visit from the preacher or elders is most effective.
For such a system to work you need a method of: 1) identifying who is in
worship, 2) monitoring attendance levels, and 3) responding to signs of inactivity.
2. Ask members to set goals for worship attendance. This idea works! Ask
members to include a “worship pledge” this fall with their “financial pledge.” Each
person estimates the number of Sundays they plan to be in church the coming year
(considering illness, vacations, etc.). Then, each quarter, send members an update on
how they are doing relative to their goal. Lyle Schaller (44 Ways to Increase Worship
Attendance) contends that worship numbers should increase 5%-10% with this
approach!
3. Have regular celebrations to highlight benefits. Everyone loves a party. We
know that big events throughout the church year draw larger crowds. In addition to
such traditional highlights, plan 6-8 more special days this year. The actual purpose is
not as important as the fact that it’s a highlight.
Promote it well, and you’ll find attendance grows. And, as you have these more
often, you’ll find attendance on other Sundays will begin to rise.
4. Involve more people in worship roles and ministries. Involve more people in
your music, communion, ushering, greeting and you will see an increase in the number
of family members attending.
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5. Obtain feedback from members on important issues in their lives. Twice a
year include a 3x5 card in each bulletin. Ask members to list three issues they struggle
with in applying the Christian faith, or questions to which they would like a Biblical
answer. Explain that you will use these responses to prepare the services and
messages in the coming months. You’ll see an increase in people who are looking
forward to a relevant worship and learning experience (or, at least, who want to find out
what problems other people have).
6. Expand the number and variety of services. If you are typical of 80% of the
churches in America, an additional worship service will increase the total number of
people you serve. This is true regardless of 1) the number of people in your present
service, 2) the capacity of your auditorium or 3) the growth rate of your present service.
In fact, for most plateaued or declining churches, this is one of the single most important
strategies to see new growth occur. The service should be geared toward a different
“people group” than now attend, and reflect good research on the kind of service that
will reach the targeted people. The service need not even be in the auditorium.
Why not appoint a special “worship task force’ and assign them the task of
implementing these six strategies during the coming year? Keep a careful record of
attendance patterns, and watch for trends. Unless there are some extenuating
circumstances, you will see growth as a result.
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Advertising
Can Advertising Help Your Church?
Can Advertising Help Your Church?
First, let’s look at what advertising cannot do . . .
Advertising cannot win people. Research found long ago that mass media
campaigns are ineffective for “conversion growth.” People become Christians through
the influence of trusted others, and because the Christian lifestyle and community
responds to a felt need.
Advertising cannot stop decline. If a church has been plateaued or in decline for
some time, the most effective advertising strategy will not turn it around. The decline is
most likely due to other factors. (The Church Growth Ratio Book by Win Arn is helpful
for initial diagnosis.)
Advertising cannot change reality. People ultimately respond to the experience
they have in your church – not the experience that is promised. Be sure first-time
visitors leave with a positive memory and desire to return for more.
So what can advertising do for your church?
Advertising can help attract first-time visitors. Growing churches average 4-5%
of their morning worship attendance as first or second time visitors. Some churches are
not growing simply because they don’t have enough people coming in the “top end of
the funnel.”
Advertising can communicate what you want people to know about your church.
A good advertising strategy informs the community of your desire to reach out in love,
and of your desire to meet their needs. Advertising can also inform your community of
Christ’s love for them, and of the opportunity for a personal and rewarding relationship
with the living God.
Advertising can raise congregational self-esteem. Advertising that is a cut above
the norm over most church promotion will give members a sense of pride about “my
church.” And they’ll be more conscious of living up to the promises made.
Characteristics of a Good Newspaper Ad
Money spent on newspaper advertising by most churches is bad stewardship.
(Although it is a good source for preachers looking for future sermon titles.) But
newspaper advertising, when done effectively, can increase your visitor flow. Here are
eleven characteristics your newspaper ad should include:
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1. It is based on target audience research. Identify a narrowly defined “people
group” you want to reach, then find out the three most important areas of
concern they typically have. Write the ad to focus on one of those themes.
2. It is written in language the unchurched can understand. If you tell readers that
your church speaks a relevant language to average people, your ad should
model that promise. Once you’ve written the copy, show it to some non-Christian
friends and ask for their impressions . . . does it communicate?
3. It highlights relationships and people rather than programs and institutions. You
may have excellent programs, but programs are a “means” to an “end.” Identify
and promote the benefit to people; focus on individuals, not institutions.
4. It catches the attention of the desired audience. Research indicates we take
between 1-3 seconds to determine whether we want to spend additional time
reading the rest of an ad.
5. It uses the 60-40 rule. At least 60% of the space in your ad should be head line,
picture, or white space. At most 40% of the ad should be “body copy.”
6. It is specific . . . focusing on one issue or topic. A good ad is a rifle shot, not a
shotgun. Highlight one activity/event, focus on one “people group,” and make it
the only theme of the ad.
7. It has a standardized form. If you run regular ads, they should be different in
content but similar in style. At some point your readers should begin to associate
an ad with your church, even before they read the copy.
8. It is regularly repeated. Not everyone will have the same need at the same time.
One ad can be run 5-6 times and continue to generate a response. (Think how
many times you see the same ad on TV.)
9. It encourages the reader to take specific action. Whatever response you are
asking the reader to take should be easy; several “baby steps” rather than one
“giant step.” Be sure you have a preconceived plan for following up the contacts
that are generated.
10. It highlight the benefits. A man doesn’t go to the hardware store to buy a ½" drill
bit. He is buying a ½" hole. A mother doesn’t go to the store to buy baby food,
she is buying a healthy child. Take the same approach to promoting your church
– identify and highlight the desired outcome.
11. It is placed where it will be seen by your target audience. The church page is OK
if you’re looking to attract other preachers (or disgruntled members of other
churches). If you’re trying to reach unchurched people, put the ad in the section
of the paper they read, which is not the church page.
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If you have a group of creative people in your church, give them this list and the
task of developing four sample ads. If the experience is good, give them a green light to
create an entire series.
(HeIpful Resources 12 Church Ads, Marketing for Congregations, Church Marketing,
Promotion Strategies for the Local Church.)
Try a “Video Brochure”
In these days when few read but everyone watches, a “video brochure” can help
your church take a step into the 21st century, and give your people an effective way to
introduce their friends to church and their church to friends.
What exactly is a “video brochure?”
It is a high-quality 5-12 minute introduction for viewers of the positive benefits
that involvement in your church brings to people’s lives. The primary purpose is to
encourage viewers to visit your church and discover for themselves the warmth and
love to be found there.
This goal is best accomplished through enthusiastic, personal testimonies from
your members. The video should focus primarily on people and benefits. A short,
personal word from the preacher is appropriate. Emphasis on facilities, programs, and
“institutional” topics will generally not enhance your video.
Some churches have lay persons skilled in video production, and can produce a
video brochure own their own. (It requires more than just a home camcorder, however.)
Professional and semi-professional production companies are available in most cities,
and a well-produced video brochure can usually be done for $1,500 - $2,000.
(I have become acquainted with two young Christians whose love is video production.
They have developed a fine production and editing facility and have produced
commercial video brochures at an economical price. If you would like to talk with them
about developing a video brochure for your congregation call them at 512+754-4625.)
Can Advertising Help Your Church?
Here are some basic themes that should be included in your advertising:
● The sincere desire to be helpful in meeting the needs of the people in your
community. (Be as specific as possible.)
● The assurance that those who come will experience love and acceptance.
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● The promise that people will find the love of God, and the Word of God relevant to
their needs, hurts, and concerns.
● The sense of purpose, meaning, and fulfillment that faith brings to life.
The people in your community will be motivated to visit your church when they
feel there may be a solution to their personal needs and wants. The need may be good
biblical preaching. It may be for love and acceptance. It may be a place where their
children can receive religious training. It may be a class on how to adjust to being a
single parent, how to communicate with teenagers, how to cope with drug abuse, or
how to become a Christian. It may be simply to meet new friends. But it will almost
always be the expectation of filling an existing need that will encourage a visitor to risk
entering the strange new environment called “church.” For them to try it, the benefit
must be worth the cost.
[Helpful reference books: Welcoming the Stranger, Finding a Church You Can Call
Home.]
What Makes an Effective Mailing?
Direct mail is one of the most cost-effective mass media tools available to your
church. A good goal is to mail to every home in your ministry area four times each year.
Churches with a smaller budget should send at least twice a year. An annual mailing
schedule might look like this:
Early Spring: a mailing sent to arrive a week before Easter, taking advantage of
the opportunity to appeal to those who go to church only on Easter or Christmas. Early
June: a letter highlighting summer interests and activities available to the community.
Early September: A mailing outlining back-to-school activities, new classes, and special
programs. Early Fall: Emphasize a special seminar, lectureship or workshop.
Of course, special programs throughout the year, particularly those designed for
unchurched people, are another good reason for a mailing.
Below is an example of a good direct mail letter. Notice how the letter illustrates
the warmth and non-threatening tone that is an important ingredient.
LETTER:
Dear Friend,
If you are like most of us you probably don’t mind
making a new friend once in a while. Those of us who are
neighbors in this area get pretty shut away from each other.
Maybe you like it that way. But sometimes you may feel like
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sending out a test signal to see if anyone would even notice!
I know I get that way a occasionally.
Life is pretty much a sending out and receiving of
signals I guess. And when there isn’t anybody around to
listen – nobody “to tell it to” – a funny thing happens.
Maybe you know the “ghosts” that haunt your mind
when it seems like nobody cares. Maybe you wrestle with
anxieties – about your health, about your job, about your
family, or some special friend. Maybe you wish there was
somebody around to laugh with you, or to cry with you.
You’ll have to overlook this kind of introduction by
mail. What I would really like is to come and sit down in your
living room. I’m just an ordinary man who happens to be the
preacher over at the church building. Don’t let that scare
you. I just thought you might like to know that I am here and
that I am available.
If you would like to make a new friend, here is one
neighbor who would like to, too! You can let me know just
by sending me back the card I have enclosed. I’ll be glad to
stop by at your convenience.
Cordially yours,
Mailings should always give the reader an opportunity to respond. If you’re
mailing a letter, enclose a card with the response information on one side and the
church address on the other side so all the person needs to do is fill in his/her name,
address, phone and drop it in the mail.
Be sure you reply to responses within the week. Keep track of the responses you
receive so you can compare the effectiveness of the various approaches.
[Helpful Resources: Direct Mail Ministry and The Church Publicity Book.]
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How We Serve Your Neighborhood
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MARRIAGE

2014-05-15T01:03:00.001-07:00

MARRIAGE
By David Smith & Wesley Simons
INTRODUCTION.
1. Many feel that marriage as we know it must go.
2. The feminists have no use for the home.
3. The humanists have no use for the home.
4. The immoral have no use for the home.
a. Homosexuals want to redefine marriage.
b. If such is done the home will be destroyed.
5. We cannot let the world destroy the beauty of marriage.
6. What is the definition of marriage?
I. A CREATION OF GOD.
A. Gen 2:19,20 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of
the of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to
see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living
creature, that was the name thereof. 20And Adam gave names to all cattle,
and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam
there was not found an help meet for him.
B. Gen 2:18 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be
alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
C. 1 Tim 4:1-4 Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times
some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines
of devils; 2Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience
seared with a hot iron; 3Forbidding to marry, and commanding to abstain
from meats, which God hath created to be received with thanksgiving of
them which believe and know the truth. 4For every creature of God is
good, and nothing to be refused, if it be received with thanksgiving.
D. Prov 18:22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth
favour of the Lord.
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II. A CONTRACT.
A. Mal 2:14-16 Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the Lord hath been witness
between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt
treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.
15And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore
one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your
spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. 16 For
the Lord, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth
violence with his garment, saith the Lord of hosts: therefore take heed
to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.
B. Rom 1:31 Without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural
affection, implacable, unmerciful.
C. This contract is both Divine and human (civil).
D. It is possible to enter a civil contract which is not in harmony with God’s
law.
1. Mk 6:17,18 For Herod himself had sent forth and laid hold upon
John, and bound him in prison for Herodias’ sake, his brother Philip’s
wife: for he had married her. 18For John had said unto Herod, It
is not lawful for thee to have thy brother’s wife.
2. Only God can join two people together in marriage.
3. Only God can disjoin two people who have been married.
4. God joins and disjoins in harmony with His written will.
III. CONDITIONED ON QUALIFICATION PRIVILEGE.
A. Only three classes of people are qualified to marry.
1. Those who have never been married before:
a. Matt 19:4,5 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye
not read, that he which made them at the beginning made
them male and female, 5And said, For this cause shall a man
leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and
they twain shall be one flesh?
2. Those who, being innocent, put their mate away for the cause of
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fornication:
a. Matt 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away
his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to
commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced
committeth adultery.
b. Matt 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his
wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another,
committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put
away doth commit adultery.
3. Those who have lost their mates to death:
a. Rom 7:1-3 Know ye not, brethren, (for I speak to them that
know the law,) how that the law hath dominion over a man
as long as he liveth? 2For the woman which hath an husband
is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but
if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her
husband. 3So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married
to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if
her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she
is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.
4. Therefore, one must marry one who falls into one of these three
classes.
IV. COMMITMENT.
A. Some want to live together for a while to see if they were made for one
another. (This is not Biblical.)
B. Gen 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall
cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
C. Acts 11:23 Who, when he came, and had seen the grace of God, was
glad, and exhorted them all, that with purpose of heart they would cleave
unto the Lord.
D. Matt 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore
God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
E. Rom 7:1-3 Know ye not, brethren, (for I speak to them that know the law,)
how that the law hath dominion over a man as long as he liveth? 2For the
woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so
long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of
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her husband. 3So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to
another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be
dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she
be married to another man.
V. COMPANIONSHIP.
A. Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and
shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
B. Jim Backus said the reason his marriage had survived in Hollywood was
because he and his wife were best friends.
C. Marriage should not be a battle of the sexes.
D. It takes team work to make a marriage work.
E. Marriages often fail simply because one of the partners does not want to
give it his/her best effort.
F. Marriage is the only place where one plus one equals one.
G. A good marriage is as close to heaven as one can get on this earth.
H. Matt 12:25 And Jesus knew their thoughts, and said unto them, Every
kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation; and every city or
house divided against itself shall not stand.
VI. COMPLETE LOVE.
A. Agape.
1. Love toward all.
a. Strong’s definition: NT:25 agapao (ag-ap-ah’-o); to love (in a
social or moral sense).
2. This is a love that is extended even when a person is not lovable.
3. This love is commanded.
a. Matt 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them
that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for
them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.
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b. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also
loved the church, and gave himself for it.
B. Phileo.
1. 1 Sam 18:1 And it came to pass, when he had made an end of
speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul
of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.
2. This is friendship love.
a. Strong’s definition: NT:5368 phileo (fil-eh’-o); from NT:5384;
to be a friend to (fond of [an individual or an object]), i.e.
have affection for (denoting personal attachment, as a matter
of sentiment or feeling).
3. This is making your mate your best friend.
4. This is the kind of love that causes you to want to be with your
mate.
5. This love allows husbands and wives to communicate with each
other.
6. This will allow each mate to promote each other rather than
provoke each other.
7. Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to
love their husbands, to love their children.
8. Rom 1:31 Without understanding, covenant breakers, without
natural affection, implacable, unmerciful.
9. This love is also commanded - 1 Pet 1:7.
C. Storge.
1. Gen 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother,
and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
2. I am devoted to my marriage love.
3. I am devoted to my children love.
4. I am devoted to my family love.
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5. This kind of love involves loyalty, commitment, and strong devotion.
D. Eros.
1. We get our word “erotic” from this word.
2. Sex is a beautiful language spoken by married people.
3. Playboy magazine did not create sex, God did!
4. Sex is not dirty. It is beautiful and wonderful.
5. Educate your children in this area.
6. Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but
whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
a. Marriage comes before the bed.
b. All others are whoremongers and adulterers.
7. This kind of love accomplishes several things.
a. Produces offspring:
(1) Gen 1:27,28 So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God created he him; male and female
created he them. 28And God blessed them, and God
said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish
the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over
the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and
over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
(2) Psa 127:3-5 Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord:
and the fruit of the womb is his reward. 4As arrows are
in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the
youth. 5Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of
them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak
with the enemies in the gate.
(3) Matt 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave
father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and
they twain shall be one flesh?
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(4) Having children out of wedlock is sinful.
b. Prevents fornication:
(1) 1 Cor 7:1-5 Now concerning the things whereof ye
wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a
woman. 2Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every
man have his own wife, and let every woman have
her own husband. 3Let the husband render unto the
wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto
the husband. 4The wife hath not power of her own
body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband
hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 5Defraud
ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a
time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and
prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt
you not for your incontinency.
c. Promotes purity in the realm of sexual relationships:
(1) Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed
undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will
judge.
d. Provides private, precious moments:
(1) Gen 24:67 And Isaac brought her into his mother
Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his
wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after
his mother’s death.
(2) Gen 26:8 And it came to pass, when he had been
there a long time, that Abimelech king of the Philistines
looked out at a window, and saw, and, behold,
Isaac was sporting with Rebekah his wife.
E. Love is the glue that keeps marriages together.
1. 1 Cor 13:1-13 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of
angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a
tinkling cymbal. 2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand
all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith,
so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and
though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth
me nothing. 4Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth
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not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 5Doth not behave itself
unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh
no evil; 6Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7Beareth
all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
8Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall
fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be
knowledge, it shall vanish away. 9For we know in part, and we
prophesy in part. 10But when that which is perfect is come, then that
which is in part shall be done away. 11When I was a child, I spake
as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I
became a man, I put away childish things. 12For now we see
through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part;
but then shall I know even as also I am known. 13And now abideth
faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.
VII. CONFINED TO THIS LIFE.
A. The Mormons believe:
1. They can have their mates in all eternity if they are married in one
of the Mormon temples.
2. Their wives are not raised from the dead if they have displeased
their husbands.
3. The wives are eternally pregnant.
4. This view is based on lust
B. Matt 22:30 For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage,
but are as the angels of God in heaven.
C. Mk 12:25 For when they shall rise from the dead, they neither marry, nor
are given in marriage; but are as the angels which are in heaven.
D. All physical marriages are limited to this life.
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An Unscriptural Divorce Is Not The Answer
AN UNSCRIPTURAL DIVORCE IS NOT THE ANSWER
INTRODUCTION.
1. In the 1960's, 1 in 4 marriages ended in divorce.
2. In 1975, 44 out of every 100 marriages ended in divorce.
3. In 1976, 47 out of every 100 marriages ended in divorce.
4. In 1977, 50 out of every 100 marriages ended in divorce.
5. Statistics:
a. Divorces cost $28 billion yearly in the US alone.
b. For every 2 marriages, 1 will end in divorce.
c. From 1970 to 1994, the number of divorces quadrupled.
d. “Divorced persons” is the fastest growing marital status category
in the USA.
e. Persons divorced more than once are almost three times as likely to have
drinking problems.
f. The suicide rate is almost three times higher among the divorced than
among those who have never been divorced.
g. The National Institute of Mental Health advises that the divorced are about
four times as likely to have problems with depression as are those who
have never divorced.
h. Studies have shown that the prevalence of suffering from any psychiatric
disorder over a lifetime was significantly lower for those in stable marriages.
i. Children of divorced parents are much more likely to drop out of school
than children from one-time married couples.
j. Children from broken homes are much more likely to have a difficult time
obtaining and maintaining steady employment.
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k. The children of divorced parents are more likely to become “teen parents,”
producing out-of-wedlock babies, than the children of life-long married
parents.
l. The children of divorced parents are three times more likely to have
emotional or behavioral problems than they will have if their biological
parents stay together.
I. DIVORCE IS A SIN AGAINST:
A. The marriage vows.
1. Jas 5:12 But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by
heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your
yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation.
2. Psa 116:14 I will pay my vows unto the Lord now in the presence of
all his people.
3. Jdgs 11:30,31 And Jephthah vowed a vow unto the Lord, and said,
If thou shalt without fail deliver the children of Ammon into mine
hands, 31Then it shall be, that whatsoever cometh forth of the doors
of my house to meet me, when I return in peace from the children
of Ammon, shall surely be the Lord’s, and I will offer it up for a burnt
offering.
4. Jdgs 11:34,35 And Jephthah came to Mizpeh unto his house, and,
behold, his daughter came out to meet him with timbrels and with
dances: and she was his only child; beside her he had neither son
nor daughter. 35And it came to pass, when he saw her, that he rent
his clothes, and said, Alas, my daughter! thou hast brought me very
low, and thou art one of them that trouble me: for I have opened my
mouth unto the Lord, and I cannot go back.
5. Marriage vows:
a. Do you take her for better or worse?
b. Do you take her in health and sickness?
c. Do you promise to keep yourself to her and her alone?
d. Do you take this woman to be thy lawful wedded wife?
e. Do you take her until death do you part?
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6. Psa 22:25 My praise shall be of thee in the great congregation: I
will pay my vows before them that fear him.
7. Psa 50:14 Offer unto God thanksgiving; and pay thy vows unto the
most High.
8. Does your word mean anything?
9. If you did not keep your vows made in the first marriage, what
makes you think you will do it the second, third or fourth time?
B. Your mate.
1. Matt 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his
wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit
adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth
adultery.
2. 1 Cor 7:1-5 Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It
is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2Nevertheless, to avoid
fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman
have her own husband. 3Let the husband render unto the wife due
benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 4The
wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise
also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
5Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time,
that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together
again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
3. Will your mate fornicate because you divorced him/her unscripturally?
4. We do not want to be guilty of placing one in harm’s way spiritually.
5. Matt 18:7-9 Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must
needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence
cometh! 8Wherefore if thy hand or thy foot offend thee, cut
them off, and cast them from thee: it is better for thee to enter into
life halt or maimed, rather than having two hands or two feet to be
cast into everlasting fire. 9And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out,
and cast it from thee: it is better for thee to enter into life with one
eye, rather than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire.
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C. Love.
1. 1 Pet 4:8 And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves:
for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
2. Rom 12:9,10 Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is
evil; cleave to that which is good. 10Be kindly affectioned one to
another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another.
3. Rom 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he
that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.
4. Rom 13:10 Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love is
the fulfilling of the law.
5. Gal 5:14 For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou
shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
6. Gal 5:22,23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering,
gentleness, goodness, faith, 23Meekness, temperance: against
such there is no law.
7. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the
church, and gave himself for it.
8. Eph 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He
that loveth his wife loveth himself.
9. Eph 5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his
wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
10. Col 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
11. 1 Thess 4:9 But as touching brotherly love ye need not that I write
unto you: for ye yourselves are taught of God to love one another.
12. Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to
love their husbands, to love their children.
D. Forgiveness.
1. Eph 4:31,32 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour,
and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32And be
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ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even
as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.
2. Matt 6:14,15 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly
Father will also forgive you: 15But if ye forgive not men their trespasses,
neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
3. Mk 11:25,26 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought
against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive
you your trespasses. 26But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father
which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.
4. Matt 6:12 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.
5. 1 Pet 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to
knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel,
and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be
not hindered.
6. Lk 17:3,4 Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against
thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. [4] And if he trespass
against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day
turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.
E. The children.
1. Eph 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but
bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
2. Divorces often cause a battle for the children.
3. Children often feel they are the ones who caused the divorce since
there is a battle for them.
4. I have had children to tell me to preach on marriage, divorce and
remarriage because of what a divorce did to their lives.
F. Society.
1. Matt 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see
your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
2. Rom 14:7,8 For none of us liveth to himself, and no man dieth to
himself. 8For whether we live, we live unto the Lord; and whether
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we die, we die unto the Lord: whether we live therefore, or die, we
are the Lord’s.
3. Ezek 22:30 And I sought for a man among them, that should make
up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I
should not destroy it: but I found none.
4. God calls upon us to make a difference!
G. The church.
1. 1 Tim 3:1-7 This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a
bishop, he desireth a good work. 2A bishop then must be blameless,
the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour,
given to hospitality, apt to teach; 3Not given to wine, no striker, not
greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; 4One
that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with
all gravity; 5(For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how
shall he take care of the church of God?) 6Not a novice, lest being
lifted up with pride he fall into the condemnation of the devil.
7Moreover he must have a good report of them which are without;
lest he fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.
2. Titus 1:6-9 If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having
faithful children not accused of riot or unruly. 7For a bishop must be
blameless, as the steward of God; not selfwilled, not soon angry,
not given to wine, no striker, not given to filthy lucre; 8But a lover of
hospitality, a lover of good men, sober, just, holy, temperate; 9Holding
fast the faithful word as he hath been taught, that he may be
able by sound doctrine both to exhort and to convince the gainsayers.
3. When a man gets involved in an unscriptural divorce he disqualifies
himself for a leadership role in the Lord’s church.
II. THERE IS ONLY ONE SCRIPTURAL REASON FOR DIVORCE AND REMARRIAGE.
A. Matt 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife,
saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and
whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
B. Matt 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it
be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso
marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
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CONCLUSION.
1. Unscriptural divorces destroy homes, our mate, society, children, the church, etc.
2. We husbands must be diligent in ruling well our own homes.
3. We must make our wives the queen of the household.
4. We must train our children the way God wants them trained.
5. The devil has done a good job destroying the home. We do not want to become
his helper.
6. May God help us to stand against that which is destroying the home as God
would have it.
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Foolish Reasons For Getting Married
FOOLISH REASONS FOR GETTING MARRIED
By Wayne Jackson and Wesley Simons
INTRODUCTION.
1. Marriage is a lifetime commitment.
2. Therefore, it should be taken very seriously.
3. There are many good reasons for getting married.
a. It is not good that man should be alone — Gen 2:18 And the LORD God
said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help
meet for him.
b. To avoid fornication— 1 Cor 7:2 Nevertheless, [to avoid] fornication, let
every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
c. To replenish the earth — Gen 1:28 And God blessed them, and God said
unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it:
and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air,
and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
d. To find someone that will help you go to heaven. 1 Kgs 21:25 But there
was none like unto Ahab, which did sell himself to work wickedness in the
sight of the LORD, whom Jezebel his wife stirred up.
e. To find someone who will be your best friend.
(1) Jim Backus was asked why his marriage had survived in Hollywood
when others did not? He said, “My wife and I are best friends.”
4. Marriage is an option and not an obligation.
a. Many well adjusted people never got married.
b. Look at the apostle Paul.
5. Marriage is to be taken very seriously. This is the second most important
decision one will ever make.
6. However, some enter this relationship in a very foolish way.
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7. Look at all the people who are sorry they rushed into marriage.
8. Will this be your mind-set ten years from now?
9. We want to look at some foolish reasons to get married.
I. PHYSICAL ATTRACTION.
A. Many people “fall in lust” rather than love.
B. Prov 31:30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman [that]
feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
C. Prov 11:22 As a jewel of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a fair woman which
is without discretion.
D. George Reeves (the original “Superman”) lost his life possibly over a
woman.
E. In Hollywood, when the women’s beauty starts to fade, the male movie
stars desert them.
F. Would you give your soul for a woman?
G. “Beauty is only skin deep, and if some were ‘skinned’ how hideous they
would appear.”
H. Prov 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above
rubies.
I. Prov 12:4 A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that
maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.
II. DESPERATION.
A. There are those who feel pressured to get married.
B. Sometimes it comes from the parents. (They want grandchildren.)
C. Sometimes it comes from peer pressure.
D. Some people marry out of panic.
E. Consider this poem:
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At sweet sixteen, I first began
To ask the good Lord for a man.
At seventeen, as I recall,
I wanted someone strong and tall.
The Christmas that I reached eighteen,
I fancied someone blond and lean.
And then at nineteen, I was sure
I’d fall for someone more mature.
Then at twenty, I thought I’d find
Romance with someone with a mind.
I retrogressed at twenty-one
And found the college boys more fun.
My viewpoint changed at twenty-two
When “one man only” was my cue.
I broke my heart at twenty-three
And asked for someone kind to me.
Then begged at blasé twenty-four
For anyone not a bore.
Now, Lord, that I am twenty-five,
Just send me someone who’s alive.
F. If you marry in haste a great life you might waste.
III. TO GET OUT OF A BAD ENVIRONMENT.
A. Some people get married to get away from mom and dad.
B. I have had people tell me, “I would have married anyone to have gotten
out of that mess.”
C. These people rarely find pleasure in marriage.
D. If one has the mind-set to leave to avoid problems, then what about
problems in their new found marriage?
E. Some “jump out of the frying pan into the fire.”
F. This is the main reason people get a divorce. They want out of a bad
environment.
IV. REVENGE.
A. The “I will show you” attitude.
B. I have had people tell me this is the reason they got married.
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C. How long can a marriage like this last?
D. Rom 12:18,19 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with
all men. 19Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place
unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.
E. Gen 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall
cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
F. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the
church, and gave himself for it.
V. TO COVER A MISTAKE.
A. Have you ever heard of a “shotgun wedding?”
B. Two mistakes do not make a right.
C. I know of a congregation that was about to split over this issue.
D. Some say, “The baby needs a name.”
E. Eccl 5:2 Be not rash with thy mouth, and let not thine heart be hasty to
utter any thing before God: for God is in heaven, and thou upon earth:
therefore let thy words be few.
F. One needs to ask:
1. Will this person make a good mate?
2. Will he/she make a good mother or father?
3. Will he/she help me and the baby to go to heaven?
4. Do I love him/her with all my heart?
5. Do I want to spent the rest of my life with him/her?
VI. IT IS WHAT IS IN VOGUE.
A. All my friends are married.
B. I feel left out.
C. It is the thing to do.
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D. Keep in mind when you make this decision it is for a lifetime.
1. Matt 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What
therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
2. Rom 7:1-3 Know ye not, brethren, (for I speak to them that know
the law,) how that the law hath dominion over a man as long as he
liveth? 2For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law
to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead,
she is loosed from the law of her husband. 3So then if, while her
husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called
an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law;
so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another
man.
VII. COVER UP THEIR SEXUAL PREFERENCE.
A. I know those who got married so they could cover up the fact that they
were homosexual or lesbian.
B. Rom 1:24-27 Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through
the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonour their own bodies between themselves:
25Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and
served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever.
Amen. 26For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even
their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:
27And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned
in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly,
and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which
was meet.
C. Homosexuality is based on lust!
D. One is not born a homosexual!
E. One is not born a rapist or child molester!
CONCLUSION.
1. We are to honor the design of marriage.
2. We are to teach our children to honor the design of marriage.
3. When a pervert marries, he/she perverts God’s standards and laws.
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How To Fight Within Marriage
HOW TO FIGHT WITHIN MARRIAGE
INTRODUCTION.
1. Disagreements will come.
2. Problems must be settled.
3. An unscriptural divorce is not an option.
4. Therefore, there must be ground rules on how to solve marital problems.
5. When people come to me with marriage problems I ask them, “Will you allow
God to settle your marriage problems?”
a. If they say yes, then I can help them.
b. If they say no, then I do not have the wisdom needed to help them!
6. Husbands and wives do not know how to fight:
a. Some blow up,
b. Some clam up,
c. Some will not shut up,
d. Some get up and leave,
e. Some divorce, and
f. Some kill each other.
7. Consider these points.
I. NO HITTING.
A. I have been in homes where there were broken dishes, etc.
B. I have seen the battle scars on the bodies of husbands and wives who did
not take God’s approach to settling conflicts.
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C. Eph5:28,29 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that
loveth his wife loveth himself. 29For no man ever yet hated his own flesh;
but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.
D. It takes a “low life” to hit his wife.
E. 1 Pet 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge,
giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs
together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
II. NO WITHHOLDING OF THE BODY.
A. Don’t let your children see you sleeping on the couch unless you are sick.
B. Some people have gone for months, even years, without sleeping with
their mates.
C. This puts your mate in great temptation.
D. 1 Cor 7:1-5 Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is
good for a man not to touch a woman. 2Nevertheless, to avoid fornication,
let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
3Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise
also the wife unto the husband. 4The wife hath not power of her own
body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of
his own body, but the wife. 5Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with
consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and
come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
E. Are you stealing from your mate?
III . DO NOT LET THE SUN GO DOWN ON YOUR WRATH.
A. Do not go to bed mad at each other.
B. Eph 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your
wrath.
1. One can be angry without sinning.
2. Mk 3:4,5 And he saith unto them, Is it lawful to do good on the
sabbath days, or to do evil? to save life, or to kill? But they held
their peace. 5And when he had looked round about on them with
anger, being grieved for the hardness of their hearts, he saith unto
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the man, Stretch forth thine hand. And he stretched it out: and his
hand was restored whole as the other.
IV. LOVE YOUR MATE WHEN YOUR MATE IS NOT LOVABLE. (AGAPE LOVE.)
A. Prov 18:22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth
favour of the LORD.
B. Matt 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse
you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully
use you, and persecute you.
C. Lk 6:27 But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to
them which hate you.
D. Lk 6:35 But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for
nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children
of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.
V. FORGIVE EACH OTHER.
A. Matt 6:14,15 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father
will also forgive you: 15But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither
will your Father forgive your trespasses.
B. Eph 4:32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one
another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.
C. I have known those who claim they will never forgive a certain person.
D. Lk 17:3 Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee,
rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him.
E. Why should I forgive my mate?
1. I need forgiveness.
2. God will not forgive me.
3. It makes me a better person.
4. It shows a proper example to others.
5. It aids my prayer life.
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VI. NEVER BE ASHAMED TO SAY “I AM SORRY.”
A. Psa 38:18 For I will declare mine iniquity; I will be sorry for my sin.
B. Matt 14:9,10 And the king was sorry: nevertheless for the oath’s sake, and
them which sat with him at meat, he commanded it to be given her. 10And
he sent, and beheaded John in the prison.
C. One must be willing to express his/her feelings.
D. Some mates refuse to say they are sorry for anything.
E. One who cannot say he/she is sorry has too much pride.
F. Prov 6:16,17 These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an
abomination unto him: 17A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed
innocent blood.
VII. WATCH WHAT YOU SAY ABOUT EACH OTHER.
A. Col 3:8 But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy,
filthy communication out of your mouth.
B. Prov 15:2 The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth
of fools poureth out foolishness.
C. Prov 15:4 A wholesome tongue is a tree of life: but perverseness therein is
a breach in the spirit.
D. Prov 21:23 Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul
from troubles.
E. Prov 10:19 In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that
refraineth his lips is wise.
F. Prov 15:1 A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up
anger.
G. Prov 15:23 A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word
spoken in due season, how good is it!
H. Prov 16:24 Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and
health to the bones.
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I. Prov 17:27 He that hath knowledge spareth his words: and a man of
understanding is of an excellent spirit.
J. Prov 25:11 A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.
K. Prov 29:20 Seest thou a man that is hasty in his words? there is more
hope of a fool than of him.
L. Prov 29:11 A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till
afterwards.
M. What have your children heard you call your mate?
N. Children learn to be good husbands and wives by watching mom and dad.
VIII. ALWAYS COMMUNICATE.
A. I am amazed by the husbands and wives who claim that they cannot talk
to each other.
B. Isa 1:18 Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though
your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red
like crimson, they shall be as wool.
C. A husband and wife ought to be able to reason together.
D. No problem is too large for God.
IX. HAVE THE ATTITUDE THAT YOU WANT BOTH TO COME OUT OF THIS
BATTLE AS WINNERS.
A. Many mates have the attitude, he or she is not going to get the best of me.
B. Matt 7:12 Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to
you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.
C. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the
church, and gave himself for it.
D. Eph 5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife
even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
X. REMEMBER WHAT POWER LOVE HAS.
A. One does not have Bible authority to fall out of love with his or her mate.
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B. 1 Pet 4:8 And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for
charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
C. 1 Cor 13:1-7 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and
have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and
all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains,
and have not charity, I am nothing. 3And though I bestow all my
goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have
not charity, it profiteth me nothing. 4Charity suffereth long, and is kind;
charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 5Doth not
behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh
no evil; 6Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7Beareth all
things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
D. Jn 13:34,35 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one
another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. 35By this shall
all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
CONCLUSION.
1. Someone must be an example to our children.
2. Someone has to be an example to the church.
3. Someone has to be an example to the world.
4. That someone is you ... and me!!!
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The Role Of The Husband
THE ROLE OF THE HUSBAND
by David Irick and Wesley Simons
INTRODUCTION.
1. God gives the perfect “recipe” for success in marriage.
2. However, a marriage will only be perfect when everyone involved fulfills his or
her role as God requires.
3. We have those today who do not like the roles God has set in place for men and
women.
I. THE HUSBAND IS TO BE THE HEAD OF THE HOME.
A. His Role Is One Of Leadership.
1. Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is
the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
2. 1 Cor 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man
is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of
Christ is God.
3. He is the leader, he is in control and he must lead. I have had
women to beg me to talk to their husbands so that they would step
out and be the head of the home.
4. The husband establishes by his life (actions) a direction for those
under him to follow. Will it be sinful? Luke warm, unconcerned? Or
will it be righteous?
5. What is involved in being the head of the home?
a. Spiritual leader.
(1) Prov 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go:
and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
(2) Eph 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to
wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition
of the Lord.
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(3) Gen 18:19 For I know him, that he will command his
children and his household after him, and they shall
keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment;
that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he
hath spoken of him.
(4) Josh 24:15 And if it seem evil unto you to serve the
Lord, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether
the gods which your fathers served that were on
the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites,
in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my
house, we will serve the Lord.
(5) Gen 13,19 Notice the decision that Lot made and look
at the result.
(6) Fathers will answer to God for not training their
children correctly.
b. Decision making.
(1) He is to consider all the facts.
(2) He is to consider his wife.
(3) He is to consider his children.
(4) But most of all he is to consider what is right in the
sight of God.
c. Morals.
(1) One cannot lead where he will not go.
(2) What has the family seen in you as a moral leader?
(3) The people of Sodom and Gomorrah would not have
made good parents.
(a) 2 Pet 2:6 And turning the cities of Sodom and
Gomorrah into ashes condemned them with an
overthrow, making them an ensample unto
those that after should live ungodly.
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(b) Jude 7 Even as Sodom and Gomorrah, and the
cities about them in like manner, giving themselves
over to fornication, and going after
strange flesh, are set forth for an example, suffering
the vengeance of eternal fire.
(4) The people of Noah’s day would not have made good
parents.
(a) Gen 6:5 And God saw that the wickedness of
man was great in the earth, and that every imagination
of the thoughts of his heart was only
evil continually.
(5) Herod and Herodias would not have made good
parents
(a) Mk 6:17-24 For Herod himself had sent forth
and laid hold upon John, and bound him in
prison for Herodias’ sake, his brother Philip’s
wife: for he had married her. 18For John had
said unto Herod, It is not lawful for thee to have
thy brother’s wife. 19 Therefore Herodias had a
quarrel against him, and would have killed
him; but she could not: 20For Herod feared
John, knowing that he was a just man and an
holy, and observed him; and when he heard
him, he did many things, and heard him gladly.
21 And when a convenient day was come, that
Herod on his birthday made a supper to his
lords, high captains, and chief estates of Galilee;
22And when the daughter of the said Herodias
came in, and danced, and pleased Herod
and them that sat with him, the king said unto
the damsel, Ask of me whatsoever thou wilt,
and I will give it thee. 23And he sware unto her,
Whatsoever thou shalt ask of me, I will give it
thee, unto the half of my kingdom. 24And she
went forth, and said unto her mother, What
shall I ask? And she said, The head of John
the Baptist.
B. The Husband Is To Provide For His Wife and Family.
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1. 1 Tim 5:8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those
of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.
2. The level of prosperity is NOT what is considered, but that he is to
provide an adequate “provision.”
3. Husbands Need To Be Careful That This Duty Is Not Abused.
a. Matt 4:4 But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall
not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth
out of the mouth of God.
b. Jn 6:27 Labour not for the meat which perisheth, but for that
meat which endureth unto everlasting life, which the Son of
man shall give unto you: for him hath God the Father sealed.
c. Our jobs should not become our lives.
d. Do you work constant overtime?
e. Do you work weekends?
f. Do you have time for your family?
III. THE KIND OF LOVE THE HUSBAND IS TO HAVE TOWARD HIS WIFE.
A. He Is To Love His Wife As Christ Loved The Church.
1. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the
church, and gave himself for it.
2. Col 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
3. Rom 5:6-8 For when we were yet without strength, in due time
Christ died for the ungodly. 7For scarcely for a righteous man will
one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to
die. 8But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we
were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
4. Jn 15:13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down
his life for his friends.
a. He loved us when we were not lovable.
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b. He loved us unconditionally.
c. He loved us sacrificially.
d. He loved us seeking our best interest.
e. He loved us unto death.
B. He Is To Love His Wife As He Loves Himself.
1. Eph 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He
that loveth his wife loveth himself.
2. By implication my wife’s happiness should mean as much to me as
my own happiness!
3. Just as I do not want to have another talk to me in an ugly manner,
I should never speak to her in an unfriendly tone, etc.
4. As men we do not want to be taken for granted, run over or
ignored.
5. Therefore, we should not want to do this to our wives.
6. Matt 7:12 Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men
should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the
prophets.
C. The Husband Must Give Honor Unto His Wife As The Weaker
Vessel.
1. 1 Pet 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to
knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel,
and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be
not hindered.
a. Honor: “a value, i.e. money paid, or valuables; by analogy,
esteem (especially of the highest degree) or the dignity itself.”
(Strong.)
2. The wife is (generally) the weaker part physically and emotionally.
3. She is not weaker intellectually.
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4. Eph 5:29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth
and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.
D. The Husband Is To Be Faithful To His Wife.
1. Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but
whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
2. 1 Cor 7:2,3 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have
his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 3Let the
husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also
the wife unto the husband.
3. Matt 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it
be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery:
and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
E. “But He That Is Married Careth For The Things That Are Of The
World, How He May Please His Wife” 1 Cor 7:33.
1. When you consider these things the idea of a husband being a
cruel dictator evaporates!
2. The husband should always be genuinely concerned with her
desires/interests and needs.
3. Deut 24:5 When a man hath taken a new wife, he shall not go out
to war, neither shall he be charged with any business: but he shall
be free at home one year, and shall cheer up his wife which he hath
taken.
CONCLUSION.
1. When the husband fulfills his role and wife fulfills her role you have God’s
beautiful arrangement of marriage.
2. Col 3:17 And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord
Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.
3. 1 Pet 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving
honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of
the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
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The Role Of The Wife
THE ROLE OF THE WIFE
David Irick and Wesley Simons
INTRODUCTION.
1. 1 Cor 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and
the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
2. The feminist movement has hurt the concept of the role of the wife in marriage.
3. The role of the wife in marriage is a vital link in building a successful marriage.
4. Any marriage can only be as strong as each link in the chain.
5. The husband must do his part and the wife must do her part.
I. THE WIFE IS TO SUBMIT UNTO HER HUSBAND.
A. This command is not cultural in nature as some claim.
1. The husband is to be the head of the home.
2. 1 Tim 2:12-15 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp
authority over the man, but to be in silence. 13For Adam was first
formed, then Eve. 14And Adam was not deceived, but the woman
being deceived was in the transgression. 15Notwithstanding she
shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity
and holiness with sobriety.
3. Gen 3:16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow
and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and
thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
4. 1 Cor 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man
is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of
Christ is God.
5. Too many wives wear the pants.
6. Some men have the attitude: “The wife runs things in our house
and I bring home the bacon.”
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7. Many men are “henpecked.”
8. Frances Quarles wrote:
Ill thrives the hapless family that shows
A cock that’s silent, and a hen that crows;
I know not which live most unnatural lives,
Obeying husbands or commanding wives.
B. God commands the wife to submit unto her husband.
1. This is not a principle that men have made up to keep their wives
under control.
2. The feminist movement opposes this thought with all their might.
3. They believe that this makes a women a second rate human being.
a. 1 Cor 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of
every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man;
and the head of Christ is God.
b. 1 Cor 15:28 And when all things shall be subdued unto him,
then shall the Son also himself be subject unto him that put
all things under him, that God may be all in all.
c. I am subject to the police officer which pulls me over, but I
am not inferior to him.
d. The woman is not inferior to the man.
4. Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as
unto the Lord.
a. Submit - “To arrange under, to subordinate, a military term
meaning to arrange in a military fashion under the command
of a leader” (Thayer).
5. Eph 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the
wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
a. Notice that Paul says wives are to submit in the like manner
as the church submits to Christ.
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6. 1 Pet 3:1 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands;
that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the
word be won by the conversation of the wives.
7. 1 Pet 3:5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also,
who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto
their own husbands.
C. This carries the idea of obeying the husband.
1. Titus 2:2-5 That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound
in faith, in charity, in patience. 3The aged women likewise, that they
be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given
to much wine, teachers of good things; 4That they may teach the
young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their
children, 5To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient
to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
a. This comes from the same Greek word elsewhere translated
“submit.”
2. Eph 5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his
wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
a. Reverence: “To reverence, to venerate (venerate - to look
upon with feelings of deep respect - Webster).
b. To treat with deference (deference-yielding in opinion,
judgment, wishes, etc. - Webster).
c. Reverential obedience (Thayer).
3. Some women do not want the word “obey” in their marriage vows.
4. Women must follow God’s pattern on this point!
5. Is this a “hard command?” Consider. Husbands are commanded to
love their wives as Christ loved the church and as he loves himself.
6. He is to nourish and cherish her.
7. Thus, in context to his leadership and her submission this must be
considered as God’s overall plan. Yes, she is to submit, reverence
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and obey her husband. When both positions are followed there will
be very little tension.
8. He loves her in such a special manner his desire will be nothing but
good for his wife and the family, making it easy for her to follow.
9. Sarah is used as an example.
a. 1 Pet 3:6 Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord:
whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not
afraid with any amazement.
10. Do you promise to love, honor and obey?
II. THE WIFE IS TO LOVE HER HUSBAND.
A. Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their
husbands, to love their children.
B. This means that you love them even when they are not lovable.
C. There is no Bible authority for falling out of love with one’s mate.
D. 1 Pet 4:8 And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for
charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
E. Matt 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother,
and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?
III. THE WIFE IS TO LOVE THE CHILDREN.
A. Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their
husbands, to love their children.
B. Rom 1:31 Without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural
affection, implacable, unmerciful.
C. Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
D. Notice these quotes:
1. “All that I am, or can be, I owe to my angel mother” (Abraham
Lincoln).
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2. “The mother’s heart is the child’s schoolroom” (Henry Ward
Beecher).
3. “The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world” (John Gray).
4. “Youth fades, love drops, the leaves of friendship fall. A mother’s
secret love outlives them all” (Oliver Wendell Holmes).
IV. THE WIFE IS A KEEPER AT HOME.
A. Titus 2:5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their
own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
B. Too many mothers work so that the family can have more material things.
C. They do this to the peril of their family.
CONCLUSION.
1. Whether male or female, may we always seek to follow God’s pattern in all
things.
2. For by doing so we find true happiness!
3. A man is not qualified to be an elder unless he rules well his own house.
a. 1 Tim 3:4 One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in
subjection with all gravity.
b. Titus 1:6 If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful
children not accused of riot or unruly.
4. The homes in America are in disarray.
5. The same is true with the world.
6. God has the answer!
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Marriage, Divorce And Remarriage
MARRIAGE, DIVORCE AND REMARRIAGE
Matthew 19:1-12
INTRODUCTION.
1. When we look at our society today we’re living in a day and time when many
homes are broken up.
2. As a matter of fact, in many cities, more divorces are granted than marriage
licenses.
3. We are allowing Hollywood to set our standards as far as morals are
concerned, rather than the word of God.
4. We are going to have to go back to the Bible. Otherwise, the home will be
destroyed.
5. The sad part is that even some preachers in our great brotherhood have begun
to loose the laws of God and advocate that we can fellowship just anyone regardless
of how many times they have been married, divorced and remarried.
6. Some elders and churches hold these same views.
7. Some advocate that it doesn’t matter what the reason is for divorce, that if one
remarries unscripturally then all he has to do is either be baptized into Christ or, if
he is a Christian, pray and God will forgive and accept that situation. Is this what
the Bible teaches?
8. If this is what the Bible teaches then that is what we want to do. But if it is not
what the Bible teaches, then certainly we do not want to do that.
I. JESUS INFLUENCED MULTITUDES.
A. Matt 19:1,2 And it came to pass, that when Jesus had finished these
sayings, he departed from Galilee, and came into the coasts of Judaea
beyond Jordan; 2And great multitudes followed him; and he
healed them there.
B. While on earth our Lord influenced multitudes.
C. He had the golden opportunity to teach the greatest principles ever taught.
In so doing, He changed the lives of many people. This shows the power
of God’s Word.
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D. Jesus always told them what they needed to hear, not what they wanted
to hear. This is why they crucified Him.
E. It was during His great popularity that He taught the truth on marriage,
divorce and remarriage.
F. Many preachers will not teach the truth on this subject because they want
to be popular.
G. Jesus wanted to do His Father’s will, not be popular with the people.
H. Today we have the opportunity and technology to preach to multitudes.
I. Will we tell them what they need to hear, or what they want to hear?
J. The world is totally confused on this subject.
K. We must be God’s voice ringing forth loud and clear what needs to be
heard from God’s Word on this subject! If we do not preach the truth on
this subject, who is going to do it?
II. INSINCERE PHARISEES.
A. Matt 19:3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and
saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every
cause?
B. The Pharisees were not interested in truth. The Bible says they came to
Him to tempt Him.
C. I am convinced as a minister of the gospel of Christ that many people
have come to me with a marriage problem not looking for truth, but wanting
me to sanction their situation.
D. When I did not give them the answer they wanted to hear they went
running to another preacher.
E. We must be honest and accept the Bible answer. A true Bible student will
follow the scriptures wherever they lead him even if the answer is not what
he wants to hear.
F. We must love the scriptures even when they oppose our practice. This
can be a hard thing to do.
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G. The Pharisees wanted to know if it was lawful to put away one’s mate for
every cause. What if we were to ask this question in America today?
H. The answer from the world would be, “Of course!” However, this is not the
Bible answer.
I. We need to realize, as apparently the Pharisees did, that not all marriages
are lawful. They might be lawful in the sight of men, but are they lawful in
the sight of God?
J. They were trying to get Jesus on the wrong side of Herod and others.
K. John the Baptist told Herod that he unlawfully had his brother Philip’s wife:
17For Herod himself had sent forth and laid hold upon John, and bound
him in prison for Herodias’ sake, his brother Philip’s wife: for he had married
her. 18For John had said unto Herod, It is not lawful for thee to have
thy brother’s wife. 19Therefore Herodias had a quarrel against him, and
would have killed him; but she could not (Mk 6:17-19).
L. It is possible to unlawfully have someone else’s wife. This being true, look
at all the people in America who probably have someone else’s mate. This
is sinful or unlawful!
III. HAVE YE NOT READ?
A. Matt 19:4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he
which made them at the beginning made them male and female.
B. When it comes to marriage, divorce and remarriage, the problem is that
people have not read what the Bible says.
C. Let us read for a minute.
1. Matt 5:32 “But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his
wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit
adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth
adultery.”
2. Matt 19:9 the Bible says, “And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put
away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another,
committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away
doth commit adultery.”
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3. Lk 16:18 “Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another,
committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away
from her husband committeth adultery.”
4. Rom 7:1-3, while the contrast is between the two laws, still yet the
marriage relationship is used. The Bible says, “1Know ye not, brethren,
(for I speak to them that know the law,) how that the law hath
dominion over a man as long as he liveth? 2For the woman which
hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he
liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her
husband. 3So then if, while her husband liveth, (now watch, WS)
she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress:
but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is
no adulteress, though she be married to another man.”
5. Many who are divorced have never read these verses.
D. From the aforementioned verses, we see that all parties who divorce
and marry another are parties that continue to commit adultery. The
only exception to the rule is that an innocent party put his or her
mate away for the cause of fornication.
E. Many have never taken the time to read God’s Word. Therefore, when
they find themselves in violation of His law, they try to find some unscriptural
way to fix it. This will not work!
F. When one gets married he must think enough of the laws of the land to
find out what they require.
G. Should we not think just as much of the law of God and find out what God
has to say about marriage, divorce and remarriage?
H. One often gets married with the attitude that if this one does not work,
then he will try another one. Why? Because one does not know what the
Bible says and could not care less at that time. However, we have to be
honest enough to accept what this Book says.
I. The Lord says, “Have you not read that He which made them at the
beginning made them male and male?” No, that’s not what it says, but
that is what a lot of people today are advocating.
J. Some say if two men want to get married, that is all right. If two women
want to get married, that is all right. I suggest unto you that it is not all
right. That is not what the Bible teaches.
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K. Some states are passing laws to recognize homosexual marriages.
L. God made male and female. He did not make Adam and Eve plus Esther,
Ethel and Eileen just in case a divorce occurred.
IV. LEAVE TO CLEAVE.
A. Matt 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and
mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one
flesh?
B. Many marriages get into trouble because one of the mates will not leave
father or mother.
C. We are to love our mates more than we love our parents.
D. Some married people never learn to do this. Therefore, there will always
be marriage problems. Your mate should not have to compete with your
parents for your love. A double-minded person is unstable in all his ways.
E. One has to have Bible authority to marry.
1. Those who have never been married before - Matt 19:5.
2. Those who have been married and as an innocent party have
put their mates away for the cause of fornication - Matt 19:9.
3. Those who have lost their mates to death - Rom 7:1-3.
4. If one who falls into one of these three classes wishes to marry,
then he must marry one who also falls into one of these three
classes.
F. I want you to notice that word cleave.
1. “Who, when he came, and had seen the grace of God, was glad,
and exhorted them all, that with purpose of heart they would
cleave unto the Lord” (Acts 11:23).
2. Just as you and I are to cleave unto the Lord, in just that way, we
are to cleave unto our mates. The Bible plan is one man for one
woman for a lifetime.
3. Now young people, you better listen. You need to pay attention
because once you say, “ I do,” in the sight of God, you did.
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G. The husband and wife are to become one flesh; one in love, purpose, aim,
goal, etc.
1. This was God’s original plan: And Adam said, “23This is now bone
of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because
she was taken out of Man. 24Therefore shall a man leave his
father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall
be one flesh” (Gen 2:23,24).
2. They are not to pull against one another. They are to be a loving
team.
V. PUT NOT ASUNDER.
A. Matt 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What
therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
B. We need to realize that God, and God only, can join two together in
marriage. He joins only those who comply with His marriage laws.
C. In like fashion God, and God only, can disjoin those who are married. He
disjoins only those who comply to His divorce law, the only scriptural reason
being fornication.
D. I wish every judge in this great country would believe this verse.
Then, they would quit coming down with their gavel saying, “Divorce
granted”!!!
1. They should realize that they do not have the right to put marriages
asunder.
2. You and I must realize that we do not have that right either, unless
fornication is involved.
E. God says no man has the right to put asunder what He has joined
together. Will we listen to God?
VI. FROM THE BEGINNING IT WAS NOT SO.
A. Matt 19:7,8 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give
a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 8He saith unto them,
Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put
away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.
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B. Divorce is brought about because of the hardness of hearts toward God
and one’s mate.
C. God has always frowned upon divorce.
D. Jesus Christ goes all the way back to the beginning to endorse God’s
original plan: one man for one woman for a lifetime.
VII. EXCEPT IT BE FOR FORNICATION.
A. Matt 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife,
except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth
adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit
adultery.
B. The only reason for a scriptural divorce and remarriage is fornication.
C. Envision fornication as a large word which takes into consideration all
illicit sexual acts. This would include homosexuality, lesbianism, adultery,
incest, bestiality, etc.
D. Thank God Jesus used a word that would include all these things.
E. We know that a mate does not have to tolerate his/her mate committing
adultery. However, it is also true that one does not have to put up with
his/her mate being involved in homosexuality. This is the beauty and import
of the word fornication.
F. Now just forget you have ever heard any teaching on marriage, divorce
and remarriage. What would this verse mean to you? I think one can understand
it if he will just forget about what he has heard. If a person puts
away his mate, not for the cause of fornication, and marries again, he
commits adultery. If the put away mate marries again, she commits adultery.
G. The word “commits” means “keeps on committing” adultery just as long as
one is in that state.
H. Roy Deaver puts it this way:
1. “Everybody who knows anything about Greek tense knows that the
normal, regular, general, meaning of present tense is continuous
action.” (Biblical Notes, June, 1981, p. 27.)
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On page 11 of ESSENTIALS OF NEW TESTAMENT GREEK Dr.
Ray Summers uses the words “progressive” and “continuous” synonymously,
and then makes this statement: “The present tense indicates
progressive action at the present time.” In his BEGINNER’S
GRAMMAR OF THE GREEK NEW TESTAMENT William Hersey
Davis says: “Continued action, or a state of incompletion, is denoted
by the present tense, - the kind of action is called durative or
linear. The action of the verb is shown in progress, as going on.”
Burton says: “The Present Indicative is used of action in progress in
present time...The most constant characteristic of the Present Indicative
is that it denotes action in progress.” (Ernest DeWitt Burton,
SYNTAX OF THE MOODS AND TENSES IN NEW TESTAMENT
GREEK, pgs. 7,8.)
2. Some preachers today, and I’m talking about ministers in the
Lord’s church, say that one cannot live in adultery.
a. Rom 6:1,2 What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin,
that grace may abound? 2God forbid. How shall we, that are
dead to sin, live any longer therein?
b. Col 3:5-7 Mortify therefore your members which are upon
the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil
concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: 6For
which things’ sake the wrath of God cometh on the children
of disobedience: 7In the which ye also walked some time,
when ye lived in them.
I. If the innocent party puts away his mate for the cause of fornication, the
guilty party cannot marry again without committing adultery. The guilty
party has no right to remarry. There is no Bible authority for the guilty
party to ever remarry.
1. There are grave consequences for being an unfaithful mate! Where
is the verse or any Bible authority for the guilty party to remarry?
2. One cannot be guilty of destroying a marriage and be rewarded by
God with the right to remarry.
3. If this is the case, then if one does not want to stay in his current
marriage, all he would need to do would be commit fornication and
after his wife divorced him he would be free to remarry. Nothing
could be farther from the truth!
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J. If both parties in a marriage participate in an unscriptural divorce,
then both parties will have to remain single or be reconciled to each
other.
1. “And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not
the wife depart from her husband: 11But and if she depart, let her
remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the
husband put away his wife” (1 Cor 7:10,11).
2. I have had divorced people say to me, “Do you mean that I cannot
remarry? Is my only hope found in returning to my mate?” What do
these verses teach?
VIII. THE DISCIPLES’ VIEW.
A. Matt 19:10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so
with his wife, it is not good to marry.
B. The disciples said, “If this is the case, then it would be better if a man did
not get married.”
C. Now this is a hard commandment and I know it hits close to many of us. It
hits close to me. I have people in my immediate family who are in an adulterous
situation.
D. It hurts to preach this. It hurts when I talk to them about their marriage.
However, if I love the Lord and if I want to go to heaven, I have to preach
the truth on this subject.
E. It is the same way with baptism. Every time I read about baptism, marriage,
divorce, remarriage, the one church, and the one way to worship
God, I realize more and more the Lord told the truth when He said, “... few
there be that find it”, speaking of salvation. He told the truth. The Lord
knows. If we want to be among the few, then we must obey the commandments
of God Almighty.
IX. NOT ALL CAN RECEIVE THIS COMMANDMENT.
A. Matt 19:11,12 But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this
saying, save they to whom it is given. 12For there are some eunuchs,
which were so born from their mother’s womb: and there are some
eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs,
which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s
sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
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B. Some people are not able to enter marriage because they were born
eunuchs. Others were made eunuchs by men. Then some have made
themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. Paul made himself
a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He did this in a voluntary way.
He chose not to get married.
C. However, there are others who will have to make themselves eunuchs
because they found themselves in an unscriptural marriage.
1. Paul put it this way: “And unto the married I command, yet not I, but
the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 11But and if she
depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband:
and let not the husband put away his wife” (1 Cor 7:10,11).
D. It is so hard to walk out of an unscriptural marriage. I have known those
who loved God and their mates enough to do this. They are to be commended!
CONCLUSION.
1. The time to fix all marriage problems is before they arise.
2. We must teach our children the truth about marriage, divorce and remarriage
before they find themselves in unscriptural marriages.
3. Very few people will pay the price of giving up a mate to go to heaven. May God
help us in this endeavor.
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The Right Time To Get A Divorce
THE RIGHT TIME TO GET A DIVORCE
by Thomas Eaves, Andy Kizer and Wesley Simons
INTRODUCTION.
1. The word “divorce” means “to put away, to separate from.”
a. “Divorce” (def.): “1. legal and formal dissolution of a marriage. 2.complete
separation; disunion . . . “ (Webster’s New World Dictionary of the American
Language).
b. We are going to use the second part of the dictionary definition in this
lesson.
2. When one is dating and sees in his or her friend those things which will cause
major trouble after marriage, then the time to “divorce” or separate from that person
is before marriage.
3. Remember this is the second most important decision that will be made in your
life.
4. You must marry someone who is going to help you go to heaven.
a. If you are:
(1) Dating someone,
(2) Dating someone on a regular basis,
(3) Going steady,
(4) Unofficially engaged,
(5) Officially engaged, (bought ring, given and received),
(6) Engaged with wedding date set, wedding plans made, invitations
mailed, shower gifts received,
b. AND you determine that your fiancée cannot help you go to heaven, divorce
them (Thomas Eaves).
5. Here are some of the trouble areas that should cause red flags to go up in your
mind.
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I. IF HE/SHE IS TRYING TO GET YOU TO COMPROMISE TRUTH.
A. Prov 23:23 Buy the truth, and sell it not; also wisdom, and instruction, and
understanding.
B. Rev 2:10 Fear none of those things which thou shalt suffer: behold, the
devil shall cast some of you into prison, that ye may be tried; and ye shall
have tribulation ten days: be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a
crown of life.
1. If truth is more important than my life, then it has to be more
important than my mate.
2. Matt 10:37 He that loveth father or mother more than me is not
worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is
not worthy of me.
C. Andy Kizer’s true life experiences:
1. John Doe came to me in Howe, TX: “My girlfriend and I want to get
married and we want you to conduct the ceremony.” My reply:
“Fine, but I insist on having pre-marital counseling, first.” He
agreed and a date for the first session was set. In the first session, I
talked about marriage, the importance of it, etc. I talked about beginning
“as one.” I spoke of being in agreement in religion, and told
the young lady that I was going to do all I could to help her to become
a Christian before the wedding got near. The next time I saw
John Doe, he said the wedding was off. She had changed her
mind. I said, “ John , it is better to see something like this now (as
hard as it is) rather than after you are married.” But, in a few weeks,
the wedding was back on with someone else conducting the ceremony,
someone who would not talk to the young lady about becoming
a Christian, and they were married. In just a few months after
that, John fell away from the Lord and is away from Him to this day.
2. John Doe was engaged to be married. He had been engaged for
quite some time. His fiancée often came to worship with him. She
was in many Bible classes, but she was not a Christian. John often
studied the Bible with his girlfriend in her home and whenever he
could. He told her how important it is to be a child of God. The
wedding date was set. The church had a bridal shower for the
couple. Invitations were sent out. In a matter of a few weeks, however,
before the wedding, the young lady called the whole thing off.
John had made it clear to her that the Lord would be first in their
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lives and that His body would be of major importance to them as a
family. Denominationalism would not do. It had to be the Lord’s
church; and finally, she decided she could not do that. The wedding
was called off . . . for good. John is still not married. He is about 30
years old. He is still faithful to the Lord.
D. Two teenagers in Saltville, VA were just as faithful to God as they could be
until they married mates who were not members of the body of Christ.
E. They have been unfaithful for years.
F. David Sain (Florence, AL) has a video-taped lesson he calls, “Time to Get
a Divorce.” In it he tells of an interview Barbara Walters had with Donnie
Osmond. “What if you marry someone who is not a Mormon?” Osmond:
“That is not going to happen.”
II. IF HE/SHE IS PRESSURING YOU FOR PREMARITAL SEX.
A. Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers
and adulterers God will judge.
B. If your mate will not respect you now, why will he respect you later?
C. They often say, “If you love me, you will.”
D. If an individual does not honor God’s moral law before marriage how can
you trust him to do so after marriage?
1. Is this the person you want rearing your children?
2. What is he going to teach your children?
3. Will he want some young man having pre-martial sex with his
daughter?
4. What will you tell your children if they ask you if you engaged in
pre-martial sex?
E. Girls, how do you know he won’t go to bed with your sister?
F. Boys, how do you know she won’t go to bed with your brother?
G. It has happened.
H. Fornication is a sin.
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1. 1 Cor 6:18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without
the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own
body.
2. Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but
whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
3. “But he/she loves me and I love him/her.”
4. 1 Cor 13:5 Love does not behave itself unseemly.
5. The “living together” arrangement does not work!
C. Premarital sex is a sin against:
1. God: Gen 39:9 There is none greater in this house than I; neither
hath he kept back any thing from me but thee, because thou art his
wife: how then can I do this great wickedness, and sin against
God?
2. You: Eccl 12:1 Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth,
while the evil days come not, nor the years draw nigh, when thou
shalt say, I have no pleasure in them.
3. The other person.
4. Your parents.
5. Your reputation: Prov 22:1 A good name is rather to be chosen
than great riches, and loving favour rather than silver and gold.
6. Society: Matt 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may
see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
III. IF HE/SHE IS ABUSING YOU.
A. If your mates hits you now, he will hit you after you are married.
B. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the
church, and gave himself for it;
C. Eph 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that
loveth his wife loveth himself.
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D. Matt 7:12 Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to
you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.
E, This is such a bad problem that there are homes for battered women.
F. If he/she is abusive now, what makes you think saying marriage vows will
change such conduct? In fact, in most cases, such conduct becomes
worse after the wedding. Why borrow trouble like this?
G. “The FBI indicates that spousal physical abuse occurs every 15 seconds
in the U.S. This is the leading cause for women visiting Emergency
Rooms. The estimated medical cost alone may be $5 billion” (The Weekly
Visitor, Central Church of Christ; McMinnville, TN; Vol. 16, No. 44, p. 1).
H. Hitting, throwing a wife, throwing something at her are physically dangerous.
However, some other forms of abuse are harmful also, and all should
be stopped.
1. Solomon was an abuser simply by having more than one wife.
Forget the fact that it was common; it was wrong!
2. Jacob put one wife down in favor of another.
3. A man who habitually insults his wife, shouts at her, or withholds
himself or his possessions from her is an abuser.
4. Gender reversal makes the wife an abuser.
5. All abuse is wrong and must be stopped!
IV. IF HE/SHE CONSTANTLY NAGS YOU.
A. Prov 21:9 It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a
brawling woman in a wide house.
B. Prov 25:24 It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a
brawling woman and in a wide house.
C. Prove 19:13 A foolish son is the calamity of his father: and the contentions
of a wife are a continual dropping.
D. Prove 27:15 A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious
woman are alike.
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V. IF HE/SHE CANNOT LEAVE MOM AND DAD.
A. Gen 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall
cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
B. A “mommie’s boy” spells trouble.
C. Some women cannot leave mom.
VI. IF HE IS LAZY.
A. One must be gainfully employed to support a family.
1. One cannot feed his family simply by saying, “I love you.”
2. Do not get married and move in with mom and dad.
3. Do not try to start out where you mother and father are financially. It
took them years to get to where they are.
4. Remember, money problems is one of the leading causes for
divorces.
5. Prove 22:7 The rich ruleth over the poor, and the borrower is
servant to the lender.
B. Gen 3:19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto
the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust
shalt thou return.
C. 1 Tim 5:8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his
own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.
D. 2 Thess 3:10 For even when we were with you, this we commanded you,
that if any would not work, neither should he eat.
E. I have had to try to encourage some husbands to work to support their
families.
VII. IF HE/SHE USES DRUGS OR ALCOHOL.
A. Prove 20:1 Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging: and whosoever is
deceived thereby is not wise.
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B. I have had women beg me for the right to divorce their husbands because
they were alcoholics.
C. Prov 23:29-33 Who hath woe? who hath sorrow? who hath contentions?
who hath babbling? who hath wounds without cause? who hath redness of
eyes? 30They that tarry long at the wine; they that go to seek mixed wine.
31Look not thou upon the wine when it is red, when it giveth his colour in
the cup, when it moveth itself aright. 32At the last it biteth like a serpent,
and stingeth like an adder. 33Thine eyes shall behold strange women, and
thine heart shall utter perverse things.
D. Recent studies show that alcohol is involved in 50% of all spousal abuse
cases and 40% of all children’s deaths (Tim Hatfield, “There is Nothing
Social about Alcohol” in Banner of Truth, Vol. 45, No. 49).
E. Drinking and drug abuse ranks high among the reasons people divorce.
F. Do you want a drunk rearing your children?
G. Are you going to teach your children not to drink? What about your
mate? Will the teaching be by both word and practice?
VIII. IF HE/SHE IS CRUEL TO OLD PEOPLE OR CHILDREN.
A. One can learn a lot about people by watching the way they treat other
people.
B. Lev 19:14-18 Thou shalt not curse the deaf, nor put a stumblingblock
before the blind, but shalt fear thy God: I am the LORD. 15Ye shall do no
unrighteousness in judgment: thou shalt not respect the person of the
poor, nor honour the person of the mighty: but in righteousness shalt thou
judge thy neighbour. 16Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer
among thy people: neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbour:
I am the LORD. 17Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thine heart: thou
shalt in any wise rebuke thy neighbour, and not suffer sin upon him.
18Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy
people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD.
C. Prove 14:31 He that oppresseth the poor reproacheth his Maker: but he
that honoureth him hath mercy on the poor.
D. If your date will not treat other people the way they ought to be treated,
what is he going to do to you?
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IX. IF HE/SHE HAS BEEN DIVORCED UNSCRIPTURALLY.
A. Matt 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it
be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso
marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
B. Matt 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife,
saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and
whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
C. It will be hard to leave that unscriptural mate after being married ten years
and bearing five children to him.
D. The time to get out of an unscriptural marriage is to never enter one.
E. How many people do you know that would leave their mate to go to
heaven?
F. Matt 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness;
and all these things shall be added unto you.
X. IF YOU NEED TO CHANGE HIM OR HER.
A. “I counseled with two sisters when preaching in Bedford, TX. The first
planned to marry a Catholic. ‘I’m going to change him.” I begged her not to
do it. She did, and fell away. The second told me she was marrying an
atheist. I said, ‘Remember your sister.’ She said, ‘I know, but I’m going to
do better. I’m going to change him.’ She fell away” (Andy Kizer).
B. Why enter a marriage to do battle all your life?
C. If he will not change now to win your heart, what makes you think he will
change later?
D. Many times those who were going to change their mates became the ones
changing!
E. Continue to ask the question, “Will this person help me to go to heaven?”
F. Also ask, “Is this the person I want to be the mother/father of my children?”
G. What if they do not change?
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XI. OTHER POINTS TO CONSIDER.
A. If he cannot get along with people,
B. If he cannot handle money,
C. If he will not take care of himself,
D. If he is not truthful (trust is a must in marriage),
E. If he is not faithful to you while dating, and
F. If he has no morals.
CONCLUSION.
1. “Divorce” a bad mate before you marry him.
2. “Divorce” a bad mate before you marry him and bear his children
3. “Divorce” a bad mate before you marry him and bear his children and all of you
lose your souls.
4. A bad mate can encourage you to do wrong:
a. 1 Kgs 21:25 But there was none like unto Ahab, which did sell himself to
work wickedness in the sight of the LORD, whom Jezebel his wife stirred
up.
5. Mk 6:16-28 But when Herod heard thereof, he said, It is John, whom I beheaded:
he is risen from the dead. 17For Herod himself had sent forth and laid hold upon
John, and bound him in prison for Herodias’ sake, his brother Philip’s wife: for he
had married her. 18For John had said unto Herod, It is not lawful for thee to have
thy brother’s wife. 19Therefore Herodias had a quarrel against him, and would
have killed him; but she could not: 20For Herod feared John, knowing that he was
a just man and an holy, and observed him; and when he heard him, he did many
things, and heard him gladly. 21And when a convenient day was come, that Herod
on his birthday made a supper to his lords, high captains, and chief estates of
Galilee; 22And when the daughter of the said Herodias came in, and danced, and
pleased Herod and them that sat with him, the king said unto the damsel, Ask of
me whatsoever thou wilt, and I will give it thee. 23And he sware unto her, Whatsoever
thou shalt ask of me, I will give it thee, unto the half of my kingdom. 24And
she went forth, and said unto her mother, What shall I ask? And she said, The
head of John the Baptist. 25And she came in straightway with haste unto the king,
and asked, saying, I will that thou give me by and by in a charger the head of
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John the Baptist. 26And the king was exceeding sorry; yet for his oath’s sake, and
for their sakes which sat with him, he would not reject her. 27And immediately the
king sent an executioner, and commanded his head to be brought: and he went
and beheaded him in the prison, 28And brought his head in a charger, and gave it
to the damsel: and the damsel gave it to her mother.
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Are All Men Amenable To The Gospel Of Christ?
ARE ALL MEN AMENABLE TO THE GOSPEL OF CHRIST?
INTRODUCTION.
1. There are those who claim that all men are not amenable to the gospel of Christ.
2. There is a reason many take this view.
3. They are trying to get around God’s laws on marriage, divorce and remarriage.
4. The argument goes like this: If the person out in the world is not amenable to the
law of Christ, then he is not amenable to God’s law on

2014-05-15T00:56:00.002-07:00

WHY WE BELIEVE THE BIBLE
by George W. DeHoff
The Voice of History
History teaches us that the earliest forms of heathen religions were purer than
the later forms. No nation or tribe has been found which did not believe in a Supreme
Being of some kind and practice religion in some form. In every heathen system,
especially the oldest ones, may be found traces of a once pure monotheism.
Professor Fairburn of Oxford said, “The younger the polytheism, the fewer its
gods.” (Studies in the Philosophy of Religion, p. 22.)
Dr. James Orr, Professor of Apologetics and Systematic Theology, United Free
Church College, Glasgow, having quoted the above, adds, “Man’s earliest ideas of God
were not, as is commonly assumed, his poorest. – No savage tribes are found who do
not seem to have higher ideas of God along with their superstitions. Man does not
creep up from fetishism, through polytheism, to monotheism, but polytheism represents
rather the refraction of an original undifferentiated sense or consciousness, or
perception of the divine. – In theism we find a monotheistic background.” (The Problem
of the Old Testament, p. 496.)
Dr. E. W. Hopkins, Ph.D. LL.D., professor of Sanskrit and Comparative Philology,
Yale University, says, “That all religions may trace back to one primordial religion is not
wholly a narrow ‘orthodox’ view. In this form, however, it is still held by both the Hindu
and the Christian of every conservative type. For example, about two thousand years
ago, Manu, the Hindu law-giver, declared, what is still believed by orthodox Brahmans,
that one true religion was revealed to man in the beginning and that all later types of
religion have been vain divergencies from this divine mode.” (The History of Religions,
p. 12.)
Dr. William Matthew Petrie, LL.D., Ph.D., etc., Professor of Egyptology,
University College, London, says, “Were the conception of a god only an evolution from
such spirit worship we should find the worship of many gods preceding the worship of
one god, polytheism would precede monotheism in each tribe and race. What we
actually find is the contrary of this, monotheism is the first stage traceable in history. –
Wherever we can trace polytheism to its earliest stages we find that it results from
combinations of monotheism.” (The Religion of Ancient Egypt, pp. 3-4.)
Dr. Hopkins quotes from R. H. Nassau, “All religions had but one source and that
a pure one. From it have grown perversions varying in their proportions of truth and
error.” (Fetishism in West Africa, p. 23.)
-9-
Dr. William A. P. Martin of Peking University discusses the evolutionary theory of
the origin of religion and adds this significant comment: “This theory has the merit of
verisimilitude. It indicates what might be the process if man were left free to make his
own religion; but it has the misfortune to be at variance with the facts. A wide survey of
the history of civilized nations (and the history of others is beyond reach) shows that the
actual process undergone is precisely opposite to that which this theory supposes; in a
word, that man was not left to construct his own creed, but that his blundering logic has
always been active in its attempts to corrupt and obscure a divine original.” (The
Chinese, pp. 163-164.)
Professor Max Muller, Famous Oxford Professor, said, “Whenever we can trace
back a religion to its first beginnings we find it free from many of the blemishes that
offend us in its later phases.” (Chips from A German Workshop, Vol. 1, p.23.)
Egypt. Dr. Budge, keeper of the Egyptian and Assyrian antiques in the British
Museum, says that as late as the Fourth Dynasty only about two hundred gods were
worshipped in Egypt. In the Nineteenth Dynasty Thebes alone had about twelve
hundred gods and there were hundreds of local gods in other religions centers. Dr.
Budge said, “The sublimer portions are demonstrably ancient; and the last state of the
Egyptian religion, that which was known to the Greek or Latin writers, heathen and
Christian, was by far the grossest and most corrupt.” (Quoted by Renouf in Hibbard
Lectures, p. 91.)
India. The Rig-Veda contains the most ancient hymns of India. It shows that the
early inhabitants of India believed in one God. A translation of the 129th hymn of the
tenth book reads thus:
“In the beginning there was neither naught nor aught
Then there was neither atmosphere nor sky above,
There was neither death nor immortality,
There was neither day nor night, nor light, nor
darkness,
Only the EXISTENT ONE breathed calmly selfcontained,
Naught alse (sic) but He was there, naught else above,
beyond.”
Babylon. “There are many, nay numberless gods; but they are only revelation
forms of the One Great Divine Might.” (Dr. Winkler as quoted by Orr, Problems of the
Old Testament, p. 409.)
Greece. “The Orphic hymns, long before the advent of the popular divinities,
celebrated the Pantheos, the Universal God.” (Dr. Martin, quoted by Dr. Ellinwood,
Oriental Religions and Christianity, p. 228.)
-10-
China. Professor Legge of Oxford says, “Five thousand years ago the Chinese
were monotheists – not henotheists but monotheists.” (The Religions of China, p. 16.)
Australia. Andrew Lange, speaking of the early aborigines of Australia, said,
“They believe in a Supreme Being whose abode is in the heavens, and who observes
and rewards conduct.” (The Making of Religion, p. 189.)
North America. “The oldest tribes of North America: North-Central Californians,
Algonquins, Selish … Now it is precisely among these three oldest primitive peoples of
North America that we find a clear and firmly established belief in a High God, a belief
which, especially in the oldest of them, the North-Central Californians and the
Algonquins, is of quite a particular character by virtue of the high importance attributed
to the idea of creation. (p. 19.)
“The Supreme Being of the old Maidu religion bears the names Wonomi
(‘immortal, no death’), Kodo-yapeu (‘World-creator’), Kodo-yanpe (‘World-namer’),
Kodo-yeponi (‘World-chief’). He and only he is creator of the whole world. He is the
creator of men, whom he forms from the clay: a pair of beings, man and wife, whom he
animates. He is more powerful than any other being. It is true that he yields to Coyote
his adversary is stronger, but because, as he expressly says, men have followed him
and not the Creator. The Creator is exceedingly bountiful and intended to make human
life easy and agreeable and death an unknown thing. He is the author, warden and
judge of human morality. (p. 33.)
“There is also the belief that after a long time this world will fall down, all the dead
will return to life, and then the World-Creator will also return and renew all things. (p.
34.)
“In each of these religions there exists a true High God: nay, I do not hesitate to
employ a more decided phrase and say: these people worship One God.” (p. 129.) (W.
Schmidt, High Gods in North America.)
“By this method we have established the weighty fact that the very first men who
migrated into this continent, the first true discoverers of America, when they passed on
from north-east Asia to north-west America over what is now Bering Strait, then a
continuous land route, bore with them in their hearts the belief of one great God, creator
of heaven and earth and man…” (W. Schmidt, High Gods in North America, p. 133).
Peoples of every land originally believed in One God. “Look in what continent we
please, we shall find the myth of a Creation or a primeval construction, of a Deluge, or a
destruction and of an expected restoration.” (Daniel C. Brinton, Professor of American
Archaeology and Linguistics, University of Pennsylvania, in Religions of Primitive
Peoples, p. 122.)
-11-
Conclusion.
From these facts we must conclude that the Supreme Being, God, revealed His
will to man when man was first created and the religions of earth are but corruptions of
this original revelation.
DeHoff Publications
Murfreesboro TN
Copyright 1944

2013-09-06T14:17:00.000-07:00

politeness

2012-09-10T07:18:00.003-07:00

Politeness

Manners are the happy way of doing things.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

If something may be done in more than one way, politeness means choosing the more gracious way of doing it. Nearly everything we do has an impact on somebody else, and being polite is simply one way of making our impact as pleasant as possible. For example, the act of chewing one's food can be accomplished with one's mouth open or closed. But the inside of the human mouth, especially when there's food in it, is not a very attractive sight, and so to make our table mates' experience more pleasant, we spare them the sight of our open mouth. George Washington, who learned early about how human influence works, wrote this in his copybook when he was sixteen years old: "Put not another bite into your Mouth till the former be Swallowed, and let not your Morsels be too big for your Mouth." That's a "happy way" of doing things at the table!

The rules of etiquette are not arbitrary, and before we discard them, we might do well to consider that these are time-tested ways that have been proven to have some value. The fact that some people carry them too far doesn't mean that they have no usefulness at all.

Some people who flout the conventions of politeness do so because they think their rudeness projects a certain kind of strength or bravado. But the truly strong don't need to be impolite. As Eric Hoffer observed, "Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength."

Nor is politeness insincere or pretentious. "Politeness is the art of selecting among one's real thoughts" (Madame de Stael). Not everything we truly think needs to be spoken out loud, and even when tough truths need to be communicated, politeness will make us want to balance our courage with a healthy measure of consideration.

The bottom line is this: politeness looks out for the other person's best interests. It wants the other person to have as pleasant an experience as possible. So good manners are just a way of showing courtesy and kindness to those around us. And while the difference between the polite and the impolite may sometimes seem too small to be significant, that's not an argument for discarding the idea of politeness. In fact, it may be the little acts of politeness that matter the most.

Personal Development, Michael Fordjour

2012-09-10T06:44:00.000-07:00

Personal Development for Smart People

The purpose of this website is to help you grow as a conscious human being. This includes guiding you to discover and accept your life purpose; inspiring you to feel more motivated, energized, and passionate; helping you shed disempowering relationships and build a network of loving support; teaching you how to achieve stable financial abundance doing what you love; and encouraging you to make a genuine contribution to humanity -- so you can finally experience the kind of life that deep down, you always knew you were meant to live.

You aren't here to struggle and suffer. You're here to express and share your creative gifts, to give and receive love, and to be happy. It will take time, but this site can certainly help you get there, and the vast majority of resources here are free.

This site will help you make conscious decisions in your personal development journey and courageously follow through. This means having the maturity to take 100% responsibility for your health, your career, your finances, your relationships, your emotions, your habits, and your spiritual beliefs. It requires taking a deep look at yourself, consciously deciding what kind of person you truly are on the inside, and then getting your external reality to be congruent with your inner being. The goal is to help you achieve outstanding effectiveness while maintaining internal balance, where your thoughts, feelings, actions, and skills are all working together to create the life you truly desire.

Personal development is hard work. It takes time, consistency, and patience. If you're only here looking for shallow quick fixes and you aren't interested in real, lasting change, this isn't the right place for you. This site is designed for people who are serious about personal growth and willing to commit to it.

This site will help you learn to live more consciously, to summon the courage to face the unfaceable parts of your life, and to solve the deep problems you've not yet been able to solve. You'll learn practical ideas to make important changes in your life, both big and small, so you can get your life on track and start living up to your potential.

This site can't teach you to be perfect. Perfection isn't the point. The point is for you to get yourself onto a path of practical, positive growth. It's very likely that this site will be of tremendous assistance to you on your journey.

The main themes of this site are:

Truth: Accept reality and rid your life of falsehood and denial
Love: Improve your ability to connect with yourself and others
Power: Build your motivation and discipline to create the life you desire
Oneness: Stop fighting against resistance, and make the world your ally
Authority: Take command of your life, and learn to make clear decisions
Courage: Summon the inner strength to take action in spite of fear
Intelligence: Live authentically, and express your genuine creativity

The areas of your life this site will help you improve include:

Habits: Create a daily routine that gives you a sense of flow
Career: Build a career you're truly passionate about
Money: Achieve financial abundance without compromising your integrity
Health: Adopt health habits that empower your physical body
Relationships: Enjoy loving relationships that help you grow
Spirituality: Raise your awareness and live more consciously

Where to Begin?

This site contains enough free personal development material to fill more than 25 books. Don't let that overwhelm you though because no matter where you begin, it will only take a few clicks to find something of value to you. If you find an article that interests you, but you don't have time to read it right now, feel free to print it out for later. Whenever you print a page from this site with your web browser, you'll get a nicely formatted printout with no navigation elements and no ads. If you'd like to see an example of how any page will look when printed, just use your browser's Print Preview feature (File -> Print Preview... on most browsers). Test it right now on this page if you want.

Be sure to bookmark this site, so you can return to it again and again. Many visitors begin their days by spending 15-30 minutes here and report that it helps them become more focused, motivated, and confident.

The Courage to Live Consciously - A great place to begin is with the article The Courage To Live Consciously. This article will give you an overview of what this site is all about and how it will help you grow -- by challenging you to live up to your potential instead of settling for less than you're worth. You'll definitely want to print it out for later if you don't have time to read it now.
Personal Development Articles - Browse the free personal development articles section for in-depth exploration of key topics. Learn how to overcome procrastination, get organized, boost your motivation, and lots more. This section is all about results.
Personal Development Blog - Browse Steve Pavlina's personal development blog for the newest content. You can explore the complete personal development blog archive going back to October 2004. The blog also includes a free RSS feed.
Most Popular - Check out the Best of StevePavlina.com links on the sidebar for a list of the most popular content on the site. These are the time-tested gems that have helped visitors achieve important breakthroughs in their thoughts, actions, and results.
Personal Development Podcast (Free Audio) - If you prefer to listen instead of read, check out the free personal development audio section. An easy-to-use interface allows you to listen to all of the podcasts (i.e. audio programs) directly through your web browser. You can also download the audio files and listen to them later on your computer or MP3 player. There's even a separate podcast RSS feed.
Personal Development Newsletter - Sign up for the free Personal Development Insights newsletter to keep informed of the latest developments via email. Thousands of people are already signed up to receive it.

THE LAMB AND THE CHURCHES

2012-08-02T06:54:00.001-07:00

THE LAMB AND THE CHURCHES

The Church at Laodicea
Ephesians – The Loveless church
Smyrna – The faithful church
Pergamos – The Compromising church
Thyatira – The Corrupt church
Sardis – The Dead church
Philadelphia – The small but Faithful church

The church of Laodicea

Now we come to the church at Laodicea. The church at Laodicea is an interesting church because it is laid back and luke warm, sound familiar? There are a lot of churches in this century that fit that description and I pray that we will never be named among them. Because a laid back, take it easy kind of church, that is luke warm makes our Lord sick, that’s what He says.

So what makes a church laid back and luke warm?
• A big contributing factor in the Laodiceans case was the city itself. Six miles south of Philadelphia, the city of Laodicea was the banking center of the region. Consequently, it had ample money to spend on entertainment, as evidenced by the 30,000 seat amphitheatre whose ruins still stand.
• In addition, Laodicea was known throughout history as being very tricky politically because the city was built in a way that it could not defend itself militarily which was a very unusual trait for an ancient city. The only way Laodicea could survive was by making compromises with her enemies and neighbors
• Laodicea was a health resort with lukewarm, mineral sulfurous water that helped to ease aches and pains. The city became a medical center because they were also famous for a powder or ointment used on the eyes
• The city was also a clothing and fashion center, famous
primarily for selling a beautiful black cloth.

• They were a center of banking and finance for all the area. Laodicea was a rich affluent city with resorts and spas that catered to the rich. This particular city was known for its indifference through self satisfaction.

The church in Laodicea was a thermometer instead of becoming a thermostat. They reflected the temperature of the city rather than causing the temperature to change.

It was all about comfort, entertainment and happiness. Jesus basically to them was a Model or Mascot but He was not Master, so….

I. DESCRIPTION OF JESUS/LAMB
How is Jesus The Lamb identified here? Why?

Revelation 3:14
These things says the Amen ...
Why does Jesus refer to Himself as "the Amen?" 'Amen' meaning 'so be it', Jesus identifies Himself to this group, so prone to compromise, saying, "There is Certainty. It's Me."

Revelation 3:14
... the faithful and true witness ...
The Greek word translated 'witness' is 'martur' from which we get our word 'martyr'. What is a witness? One who lives so much like Jesus Christ and is so in love with Jesus Christ that he ends up being treated, or crucified even as Jesus Christ was crucified. The Bible puts it this way: Yes, all those who live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution (2 Timothy 3:12)."Don't talk about suffering," the Laodicean would say. "We just want to be positive and happy."
You'll never hear a message about suffering, persecution, martyrdom in a Laodicean church. They don't want to think about those things.

Revelation 3:14
... the beginning of the creation of God.
This verse is often used by cultists to say Jesus is created, therefore not co equal with the Father. Even the Jehovah Witnesses use this to say that Jesus is actually Michael the Arch Angel because He was created like the angels.
But the Greek word translated 'beginning' is 'arche', which actually means 'the origin'. You see, God the Father created all things through the Son (Colossians 1:16) by the power of the Spirit (Genesis 1:2). And my favorite John 1:1-14

II. THE PRAISE: what the Lord is pleased with

What is Jesus pleased with concerning this church, absolutely nothing… in all the other churches, even in the dead, corrupt, compromising, loveless churches He had some praise but for each church, but for this church, zilch, nada, nothing… which gives you an idea of what the Lord thinks about laid back, luke warm churches…
In fact in the next verse He tells them what He thinks of them.

III. THE CONDEMNATION: what the Lord is upset about
Revelation 3:15 16
I know your works, you are neither cold nor hot: I would that you were cold or hot. But because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spew you out of my mouth.
The word spew here is an interesting word, it literally means to vomit out. Which means two things; first this church was temporarily in Christ but now, secondly, she is making Him sick and He must get rid of her.
Revelation 3:17
Because you say, I am rich, and become wealthy, and have need of nothing and you do not know that you are wretched and miserable and poor, and blind, and naked:
To this Laodicean church which wasn't talking about the reality of sin, the need for repentance, or the Cross of Christ; which didn't speak of witnessing, standing, and living for eternity, Jesus said, "You think you're rich but you're impoverished. You think you're doing well, but you're miserable." Now comes …

IV THE EXHORTATION
Revelation 3:18
I advise you to buy from Me gold refined by fire, that you may become rich ...
In Bible days, smelters would take the gold brought in from the mines and heat it by fire until it liquefied, stirring it until the impurities were burned out.
They would know the process was complete when the refiner could look into the pot of liquid gold and see the reflection of his own face. Think about that spiritual application :)
Because Jesus is the Master Smelter, He uses heat as well. So, to these people who were impure, carnal, vacillating, lukewarm, He says, "Get into the fire.

How could they buy gold from Jesus? What is He referring to here? The gold from Jesus is only possible by giving your life. He refers to that a little later in the letter.

And buy from Me, Jesus says
Revelation 3:18
... white raiment, that you may be clothed, and that the shame of your nakedness does not appear ...
Secondly, not only get back into the race, but get back to grace. Throughout Scripture, white raiment speaks of the robe of righteousness (Isaiah 61, Luke 15) given to those who are in Christ. The Laodiceans were known for a unique kind of wool taken from black sheep, yet the Lord says to them, you need garments of white, righteous garments, the covering of My Grace.
Revelation 3:18
... and anoint: your eyes with eye salve, that you may see.
The same Jesus Who says, "Anoint your eyes with eye salve" is the One Who put mud in the blind man's eyes in John 9. The way of the Great Physician is to allow irritation to produce illumination. "You're seeing everything in a carnal way," He says, "and you need to humble yourself before Me and deal with the mud." "Ouch," we say. "That mud hurts or is uncomfortable."
But in reality, there must be an awareness of the problems in our hearts and the trouble in our souls before we can see. "Search me, O God," cried David, "and see if there be any wicked way in me," (Psalm 51).
Revelation 3:19
As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.
It’s not too late, I am standing at your door, knocking
Revelation 3:20
Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him ...
While this verse has been used as a powerful illustration of the invitation for personal salvation, Jesus is primarily speaking to this church or any church that has shut the door on Him, because of being laid back and luke warm.
(My favorite picture of Jesus knocking on a door shows no door knob or handle on the outside, meaning Jesus can’t open the door to your heart and walk in, you have to open the door and invite Him in, and when you do… and when you do…

V PROMISED BLESSINGS
Revelation 3:20
... and I will eat with him and he with Me.

Of course, that's where we really find the answer to our Laodicean condition right? at our table; which because we invite Him in, quickly becomes His Table. Amen? The Lord's Table has such a unique way of bringing us into the full understanding of the cross and consequently who we are and who Jesus is… Then after the cross then comes the crown and the throne because notice the next blessing

Revelation 3:21
To him that overcomes I will grant to sit with Me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in His throne.
"Open your heart to Me," Jesus would say, "and I'll open heaven to you."

Revelation 3:22
He that has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.
May this church not be a place that is worldly popular, full of people who have good mottoes and good intentions. May we never be laid back and luke warm, but hot, on fire for the Lord. And May we always realize that, although we were sinners who have failed miserably, God has provided Jesus Christ and He will come in to our heart to rule and reign within, if we but simply keep the door open to our hearts.

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2012-08-02T06:52:00.003-07:00

2012-08-02T06:52:00.001-07:00

2012-08-02T06:51:00.001-07:00