Today I have something special.  A guest post from Jacey’s blog, The Balanced Wife.  Jacey is my daughter in law.  Her recent post is about whether married couples should combine their finances or not.

5 reasons to combine finances when you get married

Money can be a touchy and emotional topic. Like sex, money is a crucial conversation that no one wants to have. Also like sex, it can be handled distastefully. I hope to open these conversations with class, honesty, and my best understanding of God’s Word.

If you Google, “Should I share a bank account with my husband?” you’ll find answers up and down the spectrum between “no way!” and “absolutely!” My answer is “absolutely,” and here’s why:

1.    Financial decisions facilitate important conversations in every other category of your life.  Even people who have little value for material possessions assert their priorities with every dollar they spend.  Think about it: paying your rent says that you prioritize having a roof over your head.  When your money is combined and one of you wants to spend money on a vacation while the other wants to put that money into a Roth IRA, it forces a discussion about priorities.  Yes, there will be compromises.  Yes, there would be less conflict if you each made and spent your own money.  But if you extend that argument, it would also be easier to make all your decisions independently.  If you’re going to get married, go all in.

2.    It sets your priorities in the right order: Combining finances is a practical way of showing your spouse “I love you more than I love my stuff and my money.”  While you’re taste-testing cake and choosing centerpieces, it can be easy to forget that you’re pledging your life to another human being.  Maybe that’s why we get so wrapped up in the whimsical party we’re throwing- to help us handle the gravity of those steps down the aisle.  Spiritually, you become one in the marriage commitment. Nothing on earth should be more important to you than your spouse, including money and all other relationships. You are meant to give everything in marriage. An unwillingness to combine finances is a way of holding something back.

3.    You can reach financial goals more quickly: In Financial Peace University, Dave Ramsey gives an illustration about what horses accomplish when they pull together.  Two horses who’ve been trained together can pull four times as much as one of the horses alone.  Pooling your income and sharing expenses allows you to accomplish everything faster than either of you could alone.

4.    Joint finances foster trust, honesty and communication: No one gets married with plans to lie to their spouse. Marriages that fail degrade over time, and separate money only makes it easier to keep secrets or simply fail to communicate. Even innocent communication gaps create distance. If you can’t trust your spouse with money, how are you trusting him with your heart, or your children?

5.    Accountability: Most marriages have one person naturally inclined toward saving money, while the other is more likely to spend.  Just like you’re more likely to go the gym when a friend meets you there, you’re more likely to stick to a budget when your spouse holds you to it.

Question: Where are you on the spectrum between “no way!” and “absolutely!” when it comes to joint accounts?

Jacey Verdicchio loves good books and deep conversations. You can find her on her blog, The Balanced Wife, where she pursues exceptional living. She lives with her husband, Michael, and dog, Jack, in Charleston, SC.

Mike Verdicchio
2013

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It’s Another Video!

Some feel they have messed up so badly there is no way God could ever forgive them. Nothing could be farther from the truth.

The point of this short [1:37] video pep talk is God’s arms are always open; you can always come home.

Enjoy the video

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It’s Mother’s Day!

A very Happy Mother’s Day to all Mom’s!

And, especially to my Mom!

Mike Verdicchio
2013

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Last January while teaching in the state of Washington, I read the first verse of the Bible.  I really over emphasized the word “heaven,” and downplayed the word “earth.”

Many are familiar with the first verse of the Bible, which says, “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.”  I think it is noteworthy the heavens are mentioned first.

It is both stunning and remarkable to consider just how big the heavens really are.  The pictures below are only from what we know.  Even so, the heavens are indeed massive.

Okay, now let’s add our Sun to the picture.  

And now, take a look beyond our Sun.

Antares, the brightest star we can see in the sky, now enters the picture. It is more than 1,000 light years away! Look how small Arcturus appears in the above picture!

The picture below is from the Hubble telescope’s ultra deep field infrared view of countless galaxies, billions of light years away!

Finally, the picture below is a close up of one of the darkest regions from the photo above!

Perhaps after looking at these you can understand why I overemphasized “the heavens,” and downplayed “the earth” when I read Genesis 1:1.  God said in the Scriptures, “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.”  And yet, the Creator of the heavens loves us unconditionally and His ears are open to our prayers.  That really is very humbling isn’t it?

Mike Verdicchio
2013

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Wednesday is a special day for us.  May 8 is our 42nd wedding anniversary.

It was a Saturday afternoon in El Paso, Texas, in a small courthouse, when Kathy and I exchanged vows and rings and committed ourselves to each other.  We later dined at McDonald’s, stayed at the Motel 6, and walked across the border to visit Juarez.

As weddings and honeymoons go, it was pretty low budget, and certainly nothing fancy.  Since then I have attended countless weddings, and performed many of the ceremonies.  Some were as large as 500 guests, while others were as small as 4, including the bride and groom.

The locations of weddings I have attended or officiated varied greatly, from a cozy living room, to a beach on the Pacific Ocean, to very high end hotels.   But when it is all said and done, what’s most important is the commitment a man and a woman make to each other.

Recently I talked to someone about this.  I told them what is most important is not who performs your ceremony, or where it is located, or even how many people attend.  What is most important is the commitment the bride and groom make to each other.

So, after 42 years of marriage, what do I look forward to?  How about another 42?  I realize that would put me over the century mark in age, but why not?  I would greatly enjoy spending another 42 years with my best friend, the most wonderful woman I know.

Happy Anniversary, Kathy!

Mike Verdicchio
2013

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It’s Another Video!

We have all kinds of conversations with ourselves. Dome of those chats are good while others are not so good.  This short video is about what you say to yourself about yourself!

Enjoy the video

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It’s almost May, already?  Really?  Is this year going by as fast for you as it is for me?

A number of people I’ve talked to recently feel the same way. The first four months of this year happened rather quickly.  Why is that?  Obviously time itself neither goes faster or slower, but our perception of how fast or how slow time is going, well, that’s another matter.

There are lots of phrases associated with time, and you’ve probably heard most of them.  “The older you get, the faster time seems to go.” “Time flies when you’re having fun.” “Time waits for no one.”

I don’t know who first uttered those phrases, but Emerson said, “This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do with it.”  Martin Luther King, Jr. said “The time is always right to do what is right.” Brian Tracy said “Your greatest resource is your time.”

I Don’t Have Enough Time!

One day, years ago, I was complaining about not having enough time to do everything that I needed to get done.  A kind soul told me something that day I have never forgotten.  He said, “Time is like a suitcase and every day we are each given 24 hours; some just know how to pack better than others.”

Isn’t it true?  No one has any more time than anyone else.  When I wake up in the morning I am thankful for the gift of life.  I have been given another day to live; I have been given more time.

Time is very precious.  Time waits for no one.  Are you wasting time?

We all live different lives with different schedules and different priorities.  Everything we do takes time.  Some things take more time than others.

But we will always make time for things that are important to us. We don’t actually “make” the time, but we do set aside the time for the things we desire to do.  After all, there is only so much time in a day, right?

How Much Time?

Maybe for people my age and older, it can seem like time is going faster.  Maybe because the older we get the more we realize that one day we will run out of time.  No one knows how much time he has left.

So rather than waste my time wondering why it seems like time is flying, instead I choose to spend my time as wisely as I can.  I’m not perfect at it, but I am a lot more conscious of what I do with my time today than I was when I was younger.  I try to be totally involved with what I am doing at each moment in time.

Turn, Turn, Turn

Many are familiar with a section from the book of Ecclesiastes that begins with, “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.” The word “time” is used over 500 times in the Bible, and some of those verses are quite remarkable.

Three of my favorites are as follows:

And that, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed. (Romans 13:11)

Redeeming the time, because the days are evil. (Ephesians 5:16)

So Christ was once offered to bear the sins of many; and unto them that look for him shall he appear the second time without sin unto salvation. (Hebrews 9:28)

By the way, thanks for spending a little bit of your time reading this article.

Mike Verdicchio
2013

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It’s Another Video!

There are those who claim they can predict your future.  This video has nothing at all to do with that.

Rather, this short video is about you predicting your own future.!  Really?  Yes, really.

Enjoy the video

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From the Category, “The Eastern Eye”

[The Bible is an “Eastern” book. It was written many years ago in the “East” which today we refer to as “The Middle East.”  As such, there are many customs and idioms that are not familiar to the “Western” mind.

In understanding the Scriptures it is important for us to understand the culture, but it doesn't mean that we should necessarily follow that culture. Rather, it is in the understanding of the Eastern culture that we gain light and understanding about many things in the Bible.]

There are a number of places in the Gospels where Jesus criticizes the Scribes and Pharisees.  They, as the religious leaders of their day and time, should have not only set the example of following God, but also should have taught people rightly concerning God.  In Jesus’ day they did neither; thus his criticism was justified.

One of his many comments about them concerned widows.  He said they “devoured widows’ houses, and for a pretense of long prayer.”  Understanding the culture of that time opens our eyes to what he was saying.

Women’s Rights

In the lands and times of the Bible, women did not share the same rights as men.  Business matters that both women and men in the United States take for granted today were inaccessible to women.  The limitations became quite challenging for a married woman who became a widow, especially if she had property.

In order for her to conduct business affairs, she would need to decide on a trustee. A widow would often send a message to the Rabbi, asking for help..  The Rabbi in turn would send several men to her so she could choose who she wanted to handle her affairs, and many times those sent would be Scribes or Pharisees.

In our day and time that would be comparable to a group of priests, pastors or ministers going to the widow’s house.  She could converse with them, and then select who she thought would be best at serving her interests and conducting her business properly.

They Were “Holy” Men?

In Bible times, people looked up to the Scribes and Pharisees as “holy men” for spiritual guidance.  While Jesus spoke to and about them on a number of occasions, though never favorably.  The many derogatory comments by Jesus showed just how far they were from being holy; he clearly pointed out that they did not represent God.

So when these so called “holy men” arrived at a widow’s house, they not only discussed how well they would handle her affairs, but they also prayed in front of her.  And many times it was their long and “pious” prayers that influenced the widow to legally allow one of them to be her trustee and take over her business affairs.

The new trustee then takes over.  The devouring of her house means that he cheats and swindles her.  He makes deals to profit himself, sells property and basically she ends up with nothing; what she had is devoured.

Why Such Contempt?

I’ve always found it remarkable the contempt Jesus had for the religious leaders of his day and time; you certainly don’t read any of that from him toward the common people, or even sinners.  His scathing reproof was because they were supposed to be leading people to God.  His comments allowed those who heard to see what was really going on.

If the religious leaders of his day and time had truly been walking with and for God, they would have recognized His Son in their presence.  They not only refused to acknowledge who Jesus was, but they had great hatred for him and eventually engineered his death. They had the long awaited Messiah, the Son of God, walking right there among them, and they rejected him!

It is a Choice

Today, as in all of history, one chooses what he wants to believe; there are many religions one can follow and many spiritual paths one can walk. But Jesus said that he was the way, the truth and the life, and that no one comes to the Father but by him.  “Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.”

God’s Word promises that whosoever believes in him shall not perish but have everlasting life.  Salvation is not earned; it is a gift from God.  If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you shall be saved.

Matthew 23:14
Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you devour widows’ houses, and for a pretense make long prayer: therefore you shall receive the greater damnation.

John 13:6
Jesus said unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man comes unto the Father, but by me.

Acts 4:12
Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.

Ephesians 2:5, 8, 9
Even when we were dead in sins, has quickened us together with Christ, (by grace you are saved;)

For by grace are you saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:

Not of works, lest any man should boast.

Romans 10:9
That if you shall confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you shall be saved.

Mike Verdicchio
2013

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Resources
There are a number of books that you can read to get insight on customs, manners, idioms and meanings from the Eastern culture in which the Bible was written.  The best I know of were written by Bishop K. C. Pillai.  I have had the pleasure of listening to many recorded teaching by him.

He wrote three books, and they are hard to find, and are usually over priced.  But, if you want to you can check this link to see what Amazon has to offer. Light Through an Eastern Window

Another great resource that I have used for years is a book called, “Manners and Customs of the Bible,” by James Freeman. Mine was printed in 1972 and I know they have newer additions. For the newest edition, just click the link and it will take you to Amazon. The New Manners and Customs of the Bible (Pure Gold Classics)

More Eastern Eye Articles

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It’s Another Video!

What kind of day are you going to have today?  What kind of day are you having?  Okay, how about tomorrow?

This short video is about deciding what kind of day you are going to have.  You can’t always prevent what happens to you, but you can always determine what happens in you.

Enjoy the video

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