Confident Lifestyle

Virtues to Live By

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Wed, 02 Jul 2014 06:21:00 +0000

A virtue is a positive trait or quality deemed to be morally good and thus is valued as a foundation of principle and good moral being. Personal virtues are characteristics valued as promoting collective and individual greatness.

Below are thirteen virtues that I try to live by and I am doing my best to make these virtues habits to become an every day part of my life. Have I failed at some? Yes! I would by lying if I said that I have mastered each of these virtues. But I know when I fail and I make an effort to correct myself when I have failed. I am only human after all and by no means a saint. Yet that does not mean that I am not trying to improve. Every day is a step forward in my personal growth.

These virtues are ones that in 1726, at the age of 20, Benjamin Franklin created to develop his character.

TEMPERANCE
Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
SILENCE
Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
ORDER
Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
RESOLUTION
Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
FRUGALITY
Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
INDUSTRY
Lose no time; be always employed in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
SINCERITY
Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly; and if you speak, speak accordingly.
JUSTICE
Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
MODERATION
Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
CLEANLINESS
Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, clothes, or habitation.
TRANQUILITY
Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
CHASTITY
Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or anothers' peace or reputation.
HUMILITY
Imitate Jesus and Socrates

Have a confident and awesome day,

JD
Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Secret To Life

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sun, 29 Jun 2014 04:42:00 +0000

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Utilize Your Brain Power

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sat, 28 Jun 2014 05:51:00 +0000

It is estimated that we only use approximately 10% of our brain power. When you consider all of the things that we are able to do as mere humans, it truly is amazing that we are not tapping into the power of the brain more fully. There are some people, however, who have found that they were able to utilize more of their brain and were able to accomplish amazing feats as a result. Some people have made this their lifes study but it is not necessary for you to do so in order to harness the power that the brain has to offer. Here are some suggestions that can help you to get started today.

One important thing for you to consider when you are harnessing the power of the brain is to bring your thoughts into focus. This is something that is quite difficult for most people to do because your mind tends to wander from one thought to another. If you are able to master concentration, however, you can begin to overcome some rather complex and unusual problems as a result. In fact, that focus can help you in many different ways, from coming up with ideas for inventions all the way to remembering almost anything that you need to remember. All you really need to be concerned about at that time is being able to patent the idea and capitalize on it.

Another approach that can be used to harnessing the power of the brain is optimizing its use. Although the brain truly is an amazing machine, it actually is lacking in the way that we use it in the number of different ways. It tends to be slow in processing information and we do not use the memory stores that are available to the full. If you are able to optimize the way that you are thinking, however, it may be easier for you to improve the performance of your brain in almost any direction that you want it to go.

Do not underestimate the power that can be added to your brain when you feed it properly and keep it hydrated. Many of us tend to be cloudy minded because we eat the wrong types of foods, such as processed sugar and too many chemicals. We may also be lacking in hydration, which is going to have an almost immediate effect on our brain power. If you take the time to feed your body properly, get plenty of rest and drink water regularly, you also find that your brain is able to be utilized more fully.

Finally, it may be a good idea to give your brain a rest from time to time in order to help optimize how it is working. Rather than trying to focus all of your attention on maintaining your memory and building your brain power, it may be a good idea for you to work the artistic side of your brain for a while. That can help to give your brain the rest that it needs and allow it to grow in strength.

Brain Power Control

Patrick Dawson is the author of this article about how to utilize our brain power to create ideas for inventions. With the examples of Thomas Edison and Benjamin Franklin, humans have the ability to create and patent an idea to help improve our lives.
Brain Power Control

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

How To Know If Its Time For A Change

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Thu, 26 Jun 2014 07:32:00 +0000

Sometimes it’s hard to see the forest for the trees. Maybe you are unaware of or have been ignoring some signals that a change would create greater satisfaction in your life.

Here are some signs that a change might be in order:

The thought of changing makes you uncomfortable. Most times change is an uncomfortable process. It requires you to think and do things differently. There’s always some friction in the change process. Ask yourself whether your discomfort comes from a sense that this is not right for you or if you are simply resisting getting out of your comfort zone
You are unhappy with your current results. Are you dissatisfied with the results you are getting? We all know that doing the same thing over and over again will not produce a different outcome. If you want different, you need to do different.
You feel unenthusiastic, tired, stressed or discouraged. One or all of these feelings indicates that something needs to change. You might need to change what is on your plate or you might need to change the way in which you are doing things.
You complain. We all need to vent now and again. If you find yourself complaining about the same thing repeatedly, that’s a sure sign that it’s not working for you.
You have settled for average. Have you slid into a comfortable but not exceptional life? If you find yourself saying, “That’s good enough” or “I don’t want to rock the boat”, it may be that you have traded marvelous for mediocre. You only get one kick at this life, so you might as well make the changes that allows you to enjoy life to its fullest.

Thanks to: Laurel Vespi, certified life coach and chief executive guru of stone circle coaching, ignites businesses & individuals to new levels of CHANGE. Laurel works with clients internationally, providing unconventional yet practical tips that make the seemingly impossible… possible! www.stonecirclecoaching.com

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Stop Absorbing Other People's Emotions

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Wed, 25 Jun 2014 05:09:00 +0000

This is a reprint from WikiHow. I felt that it was important to share here as even I (yes I admit it) fall into this trap at times. It is important that we learn from this and continue to grow on our path to personal improvement. Yes it is hard to admit that we have our faults, but if we learn from them it is so much easier to grow and to expand our horizons.

JD.

Emotions such as fear, anger, frustration, and immobility are energies. And you can potentially ‘catch’ these energies from people without realizing it. If you tend to be an emotional sponge, it’s vital to know how to avoid taking on an individual’s negative emotions, or even how to deflect the free-floating negativity in crowds.

Another twist is that chronic anxiety, depression, or stress can turn you into an emotional sponge by wearing down your defenses. Suddenly, you become hyper-attuned to others, especially suffering with similar pain. That’s how empathy works; we zero in on hot-button issues that are unresolved in ourselves.

From an energetic standpoint, negative emotions can originate from several sources: what you’re feeling may be your own; it may be someone else’s; or it may be a combination. Here is how to tell the difference and strategically bolster your positive emotions so you don’t shoulder negativity that doesn’t belong to you.

1. Identify whether you’re susceptible. The person most likely to be overwhelmed by negative energies surrounding you is an “empath”, someone who acts as an “emotional sponge”. Signs that you might be an empath include:

People call you “hyper-sensitive”, “overly sensitive”, etc., and they don’t mean it as a compliment!
You sense fear, anxiety, and stress from other people and draw this into your body, resolving them as your own physical pain and symptoms. It doesn’t have to be people you don’t know or don’t like; you’re also impacted by friends, family, and colleagues.
You quickly feel exhausted, drained, and unhappy in the presence of crowds.
Noise, smells, and excessive talking can set off your nerves and anxiety.
You need to be alone to recharge your energy.
You’re less likely to intellectualize what you’re feeling. Your feelings are easily hurt.
You’re naturally giving, generous, spiritually inclined, and a good listener.
You tend to ensure that you’ve got an escape plan, so that you can get away fast, such as bringing your own car to events, etc.
The intimacy of close relationships can feel like suffocation or loss of your own self.

2. Seek the source. First, ask yourself whether the feeling is your own or someone else’s. It could be both. If the emotion such as fear or anger is yours, gently confront what’s causing it on your own or with professional help. If not, try to pinpoint the obvious generator.

For instance, if you’ve just watched a comedy, yet you came home from the movie theater feeling blue, you may have incorporated the depression of the people sitting beside you; in close proximity, energy fields overlap.
The same is true with going to a mall or a packed concert. If crowded places upset or overwhelm you, it may well be because you’re absorbing all the negative energy around you.

3. Distance yourself from the suspected source, where possible.Move at least twenty feet away; see if you feel relief. Don’t err on the side of not wanting to offend strangers. In a public place, don’t hesitate to change seats if you feel a sense of depression imposing on you.

4. Center yourself by concentrating on your breath. Doing this connects you to your essence. For a few minutes, keep exhaling negativity, inhaling calm. This helps to ground yourself and purify fear or other difficult emotions. Visualize negativity as gray fog lifting from your body, and hope as golden light entering. This can yield quick results.

5. Flush out the harm. Negative emotions such as fear frequently lodge in your emotional center at the solar plexus (celiac plexus).

Place your palm on your solar plexus as you keep sending loving-kindness to that area to flush stress out.
For longstanding depression or anxiety, use this method daily to strengthen this center. It’s comforting and it builds a sense of safety and optimism as it becomes a ritual.

6. Shield yourself. A handy form of protection many people use, including healers with trying patients, involves visualizing an envelope of white light (or any color you feel imparts power) around your entire body. Think of it as a shield that blocks out negativity or physical discomfort but allows what’s positive to filter in.

7. Manage the emotional overload. You don’t need to be beholden to your ability to absorb other’s emotions; turn the curse into a gift by practicing strategies that can free you:

Learn to recognize people who can bring you down. People who are particularly difficult for emotional empaths include criticizer, the victim, the narcissist, and the controller. Judith Orloff terms these people “emotional vampires”. When you know how to spot these behaviors, you can protect yourself against them, including removing yourself from their presence, and telling yourself that “I respect the person you are within even though I don’t like what you’re doing.”
Eat a high protein meal before entering stressful situations such as being part of a crowd. When in a crowd, find places of refuge, such as sitting on the edges, or standing apart.
Ensure that you don’t have to rely on other people to get you out of difficult situations. Bring your own car or know how to get home easily when needed. Have sufficient funds to be able to make alternate arrangements if you start feeling overwhelmed.
Set time limits. Knowing how much you can stand and obeying that limit is vital to ensure your mental well-being. Also set kind but meaningful boundaries with others who overwhelm you; don’t stand around listening to them talking for two hours when you can only cope with half an hour.
Have your own private place in a home shared with others. Ask others to respect your downtime during which you can rejuvenate. This is especially important to prevent you from taking on your partner’s feelings too much. A study, man cave, sewing room, reading nook, etc., all offer your own space.
Practice meditation and mindfulness.

8. Look for positive people and situations. Call a friend who sees the good in others. Spend time with a colleague who affirms the bright side of things. Listen to hopeful people. Hear the faith they have in themselves and others. Also relish hopeful words, songs, and art forms. Hope is contagious and it will lift your mood.

Cultivate positive emotions that boost your inner strength. If you’re surrounded by peace and love, you’ll flourish as strongly as negative emotions cause you to wilt. Respecting your own needs through healthy self love will increase your ability to respect others.
Learn to use compassion as a way to defend yourself against overwhelming emotions. Compassion allows you to be empathetic to the plight of other people but also requires that you are compassionate toward yourself. This means that you don’t need to feel guilty about seeking respite from being overwhelmed; doing so ensures that you can be more engaged with others in the long run, rather than less so. It also means that you keep yourself whole by not immersing yourself in the world of negative people.

9. Create and maintain a haven for disengagement. Leave many paths open that lead to communing with the resonance of nature. Returning to your rightful home as a creature of nature switches off your victim mentality and recharges you energetically and spiritually.

Keep a picture of a waterfall or a lush forest with you and look at it when overwhelmed.
Step onto the quiet of a forest path or absorb the coolness of a gently babbling brook from beneath a weeping willow.
Maintain a your personal space of cozy retreat where you hook into your own personal power and energy.
Practise Yoga and breathing techniques. These draw upon emotional centering and provide safe harbor in times of storm.

About the Author

Judith Orloff MD is the author of many self-help books including, The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your Life, Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life, and Positive Energy: 10 Extraordinary Prescriptions for Transforming Fatigue, Stress, and Fear into Vibrance, Strength, and Love.

This article was featured at WikiHow.**

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Change

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Tue, 24 Jun 2014 13:24:00 +0000

Don't be afraid. Go ahead and take that first step today.

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Ten Things In Life That You Can Control

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sat, 21 Jun 2014 18:11:00 +0000

We humans spend much of our time trying to control every
aspect of our lives. Unfortunately, too often we waste time
trying to control things that are simply beyond our control.

Having an understanding of what things you do control can
make it easier for you to gain control of your life and
everything in it.

1. What you do.

Your actions are yours alone. You choose to make them or not
make them and you are responsible for the effects of those
actions.

2. What you say.

Likewise, the words you speak (or write) are also
consciously chosen. Like actions, they have an impact on
your life and the lives of those you contact.

3. What you think.

Yes, there are some subconscious thoughts that you can't
control. But the things that you really think about, your
beliefs, your ideals, etc. are concepts you have chosen to
accept and believe in.

4. Your work.

Many people like to overlook this one, it being much easier
to say "Oh, I'm trapped in my job because I don't have a
degree, experience, etc."

Hogwash! That's simple a way of denying one's responsibility
in having chosen the job in the first place. It's your job
and you chose it. If you stay (or go), that's a choice as
well.

5. The people you associate with.

There's a famous t-shirt that states: "It's hard to soar
like an eagle when you're surrounded by turkeys." Colloquial
is very often correct! Your friends can either lift you up
or bring you down. You make the decision which type of
friends you wish to have.

6. Your basic physical health.

Much about our health is a factor of genetics, environment,
and exposure. Much more of our health is simply a matter of
the decisions we make about our health, such as: diet,
exercise, drugs, sleep, routine physicals, check-ups, etc.

7. The environment you live in.

Your house, the condition of your home, the town you live
in, the amenities available to you are all things you can
control, although some to a lesser degree (i.e., you decide
to tolerate them or move someplace else).

8. Your fiscal situation.

Having or not having enough money is a factor of what you
make versus what you spend.

9. Your time.

You choose how to "spend" your time and how much of your
time to give to various activities. You'll never get more
time than the 24 hours you're given each day.

10. Your legacy.

All your actions, words and knowledge that you share while
you are living become the gift that you leave when you are
gone.

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Jim Allen is a professional life & business coach. For more ideas, subscribe to his free bi-weekly ezine, THE BIG IDEA, by sending a blank email to: SubscribeGA@CoachJim.com

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Hasten The Change To Your Confident You

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Wed, 18 Jun 2014 04:59:00 +0000

How can we hasten the change in our beliefs in order to build our confidence and self esteem? All our beliefs have been developed gradually over many years therefore it will take time to develop new beliefs. However, we can further the emergence of the new YOU by regularly repeating positive affirmations.

We can also improve our confidence by using Visualizing techniques. You have probably seen or heard that when flight pilots develop new skills they use a flight simulator to do this. This is because the simulator is able to replicate exact experiences the pilot will encounter when at the controls of an aircraft. Similarly we can use our imagination to act as a simulator to enforce positive experiences and beliefs which we can then replicate in real life.

Take time each day to visualize yourself being the person you want to be. For example, if you lack confidence in social situations you may wish to visualize yourself walking into a room full of people shaking hands, smiling and chatting in a relaxed manner. Whilst visualizing this scene feel that friendly relaxed energy that you would like to enjoy, rather than stress and anxiety and sweaty hands you presently experience. Note your heart beating at a normal steady rhythm (not pounding), and feel the lovely inner glow you are experiencing when meeting these new people and smile and nod to verify your interest in what they have to say. You will be simulating an experience of someone you would like to be as though you already have these social skills.

Keep repeating these exercises across all areas of your life until you become that confident and relaxed person you have visualized. The more you bring all the feelings and emotions to the exercise the greater the improvement.

As you develop your self esteem you will find that you start attracting new and different people into your life and you will start thinking more positively about yourself and others. Next week we will discuss the importance of mixing with positive people. We will look at the people who will assist you in your journey to find the new confident YOU.

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

About The Author

At Elisjones our aim is not to be the biggest but the BEST. The best in terms of the quality candidates we deliver, the quality service we provide to candidates and clients; the caring attitude we provide to all, and the giving and sharing of our time - always in an ethical and honest manner.

The author invites you to visit: http://www.elisjones.com.au

Article Source:
http://www.articlecity.com/articles/self_improvement_and_motivation/article_9317.shtml

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

What Makes You Tick?

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Tue, 17 Jun 2014 08:07:00 +0000

"What Really Makes You Tick?" 10 questions you should ask to yourself: a preparation to self-improvement

Be all you can be, but it's not always in the Army. I often see myself as somewhat contented with my life the way things are, but of course it's hard to think of anything else when where are real issues to be discussed.

Still I aspire for something deeper and more meaningful.

So we're all pelted with problems. Honestly it shouldn't even bother or even hinder us to becoming all we ought to be. Aspirations as kids should continue to live within us, even though it would be short-lived or as long as we could hold on to the dream. They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks… or can they?

1. What do I really want?
The question of the ages. So many things you want to do with your life and so little time to even go about during the day.

Find something that you are good at can help realize that small step towards improvement. Diligence is the key to know that it is worth it.

2. Should I really change?
Today's generation has taken another level of redefining 'self', or at least that's what the kids are saying. Having an army of teenage nieces and nephews has taught me that there are far worse things that they could have had than acne or maybe even promiscuity. So how does that fit into your lifestyle?

If history has taught us one thing, it's the life that we have gone through. Try to see if partying Seventies style wouldn't appeal to the younger generation, but dancing is part of partying. Watch them applaud after showing them how to really dance than break their bones in break-dancing.

3. What's the bright side in all of this?
With so much is happening around us there seem to be no room for even considering that light at the end of the tunnel. We can still see it as something positive without undergoing so much scrutiny. And if it's a train at the end of the tunnel, take it for a ride and see what makes the world go round!

4. Am I comfortable with what I'm doing?
There's always the easy way and the right way when it comes to deciding what goes with which shoes, or purse, shirt and whatnot. It doesn't take a genius to see yourself as someone unique, or else we'll all be equally the same in everything we do. Variety brings in very interesting and exciting questions to be experimented.

5. Have I done enough for myself?
Have you, or is there something more you want to do? Discontentment in every aspect can be dangerous in large doses, but in small amounts you'll be able to see and do stuff you could never imagine doing.

6. Am I happy at where I am today?
It's an unfair question so let it be an answer! You love being a good and loving mom or dad to your kids, then take it up a notch! Your kids will love you forever. The same goes with everyday life!

7. Am I appealing to the opposite sex?
So maybe I don't have an answer to that, but that doesn't mean I can't try it, though. Whether you shape-up, change the way you wear your clothes or hair, or even your attitude towards people, you should always remember it will always be for your own benefit.

8. How much could I have?
I suppose in this case there is no such things on having things too much or too little, but it's more on how badly you really need it. I'd like to have lots of money, no denying that, but the question is that how much are you willing to work for it?

9. What motivates me?
What motivates you? It's an answer you have to find out for yourself. There are so many things that can make everyone happy, but to choose one of the may be the hardest part. It's not like you can't have one serving of your favorite food in a buffet and that's it. Just try it piece by piece.

10. What Really Makes You Tick?
So? What really makes you tick? You can be just about anything you always wanted to be, but to realize that attaining something that may seem very difficult is already giving up before you even start that journey. Always remember, that self-improvement is not just about the physical or philosophical change you have to undergo, but it's something that you really want.

The Little Manual of Happiness – 7 Simple Steps to a Joyful Life

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noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Tue, 17 Jun 2014 06:52:00 +0000

How to Gain Confidence

Author: Get Confidence
Everybody want to live the life of their dreams. Some people feel that they are really far from their ideal picture of the dream-life while others feel that they are pretty close and still closing in.
To create and live the life you want it's important to gain confidence in the areas of your life that will get you there. You may have some really high ambitions and resources but without the confidence to meet your goals it is going to be challenging to follow through because you cannot do what we need to seize the things that rightfully belong to us and the future that we know that we deserve.
With confidence you'll get:

The respect that you deserve because other people will acknowledge you
Less difficult to contact new people
Prepared to new situations rather then intimidated by them.

When you lose your self-confidence, or you find that you do not have the confidence you need to benefitof the situation you're in, you can feel alone and isolated. Feelings of low self-confidence can make one feel worthless or as though they are not worthy of the possibilities for them. When you suffer from low self-confidence, it is important that you do whatever you can to change it. There are a number of ways that you can change your confidence levels over an extended time period.
Some techniques to gain confidence include:

Exercising More - When you are healthier and feel better about the way you look, confidence will follow. The more you exercise the more fit you will become, and some of the possible causes of low self-confidence will be eliminated.
Fake It - By faking self-confidence and forcing yourself to act confident even when you are terrified inside, you will quickly become used to the experience of acting confident in public and the emotions/anxiety that goes along with it.
Write Down the Positive - Often times low self-confidence is due to harmed/damaged self-esteem. Part of that comes from focusing on all that may go wrong in any situation. Focusing on the negative can make you feel worse about yourself and less hopeful for the future. Instead, try to change your approach by writing down all of the positives that come out of every situation, so you can see on paper all of the things that you haveaccomplished.

By following these bullet points you'll boost your physiology, mindset and language pattern and will get a completely different outcome. That will gain you confidence!
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/self-help-articles/how-to-gain-confidence-2640170.html
About the Author
Teach, coach and write about confidence and performance to deal with extreme circumstances. From tactical conflict management to mindset preparations in life.
Free Success Library!

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sat, 14 Jun 2014 10:52:00 +0000

Dreams to confidence

Author: Get Confidence

Dreams

We all have dreams in our lives and they started already in our childhood. We wanted to become the hero in the fairytale, superstar or fireman and so on.

It's healthy to have hopes and dreams because deep down in our soul they create faith in our lives. On the other hand isn't it healthy to believe that all dreams should remain just fantasies some part of that wish should be realized in one way or another. Some people's dreams become true and others stay as a dream because they are better off that way. But is that really true?

Is it healthy to live a life without hopes, wishes and dreams? Some people claim it's realistic but isn't that just another way to excuse yourself for maintaining low standards and little courage?

If we let our dream be a vision for our life to act and plan in that direction it's strange how realistic some goals or dreams can become. Don't be completely unrealistic though. If your dream is far from your present status you need a lot of resourcefulness and time and if it's close and just needs a shift of focus you might be close as soon as that is taken care of.

"There are no such things as unrealistic goals, only unrealistic timeframes"

Do you have a forgotten dream that has been suppressed for a long time? Take a moment to dream and just think about whom you really are and what you really want for your life.

Now you have to create a vision how that life should look like in a perfect world. It can still be pretty close to the dream version you just had like it's far in the horizon or shaded by clouds.

Next step is to make a clear goal close to that vision. This one is very detailed and specific so write it down and make a plan with a date.

Now you have your target and it's time to aim for it with a strategy how to get there. You have to think if you want to reach your goal with a big gun fast or with a simple crossbow. It all depends on your resources and time.

Don't be surprised if miss the target a few times before you reach your goal. We all need some time to adjust the sight before we hit the bull's-eye. But when you do your confidence will have a blast!

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/self-help-articles/dreams-to-confidence-2591429.html
About the Author
Teach, coach and write about confidence and performance to deal with extreme circumstances. From tactical conflict management to mindset preparations in life.

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Attitude Is A Really ImportantThing

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sat, 21 Aug 2010 19:58:00 +0000

Regardless of your age, your place in life, your occupation, or the ways you choose to spend time, I can guarantee that your attitude is one of the most significant things that determines your happiness and contentment in life.

Attitude is so powerful because it is one of the few things that every single person has the ability to be in control of regardless of any other factors in life. When life is going well and we have no complaints we can choose what kind of attitude to face each day with. Fortunately, when our lives seem like they couldn't get any worse we can also choose what kind of attitude we will have each day.

Can you think about a time in your life when your attitude made all the difference? Or, maybe think of an example from the life of someone you know. Can you think of a situation when all things looked grim and yet you or someone else's attitude made that situation better just by being positive?

You may be wondering why it is important to keep a good attitude regardless of other factors in your life. Good question. One thing I've learned about life is that it will not always go my way. It is highly unlikely that every single day for the rest of my life will be filled with joy, friendships, and peace. It is possible, but unlikely. It is much more likely that life will throw me things I wasn't expecting. Tragedies, sicknesses, and relationship trials will come my way and it will be my attitude that determines how those events affect me.

Keeping a good attitude in life allows us to remember that even in tough times we have much to be thankful for. Choose to let your attitude reflect this perspective rather than reflecting the fact that you are not getting exactly what you want at a moment in time. Let your attitude reflect all of the ways that your life has been blessed and all of the good things that have happened to you.

We have all heard it said that "attitude is a little thing that can make a big difference." I agree with whoever said those words wholeheartedly, but I'll even take it a step further and simply say that attitude is a big thing. Attitude is perhaps one of the biggest factors that determines the path and results we see in life. When we can look at the worst situations with hope and a right perspective, nothing will be too difficult to bear.

Have a confident and positive day,

JD

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!
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A Rested Mind Can Improve Your Productivity

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sat, 21 Aug 2010 19:23:00 +0000

Imagine that you’re working late at night on a project due in the morning. Your body is tired and your mind is numb, but this project must get done, so you push on. You continue to work, despite the distinct feeling that the project would be much easier if you went to bed and approached it again in the morning. You feel obligated to do it now, so you stay up until the wee hours of the morning, producing less than desirable work in much more time than it would have taken with a rested mind. This was likely not the wisest move, since not only productivity was lost, but quality as well.

Having a rested mind really can make a difference in our daily productivity, whether it's work or housework we are trying to accomplish. Our minds were not meant to work for hours on end with no downtime. They need breaks and vacations. They need the ability to recharge from the daily overload of sensory and thought perceptions. Constantly running our minds on overtime without frequent periods of restoration can be detrimental to our work, our attitude, and even our physical health.

Luckily, there are a few simple steps you can take to prevent your mind from working on overload. Follow these helpful tips and ideas for increasing your daily productivity:

Get more sleep – Adequate sleep is crucial to allowing our subconscious minds to let go of all the stress of the day. During sleep our minds recharge themselves, generating the stamina and renewed perception needed for a fresh new day. If we fail to get adequate sleep, our minds will be sluggish and slow, essentially shutting down from the overload of stimuli. This creates conditions in which we cannot effectively think, speak, or act to our fullest potential.

Without the level of awareness and alertness that a rested mind provides, our pace slows down and productivity is lost. When our minds are overworked we often fall into "space cadet" mode, and we have trouble focusing on the tasks at hand. Thoughts frequently wander, and the ability to concentrate is lost. Most people know how much sleep they require to feel refreshed, but we rarely allow ourselves such a luxury. Try viewing adequate sleep as an investment into your overall well-being, and reap the rewards the next morning.

Reduce stress – Excessive stress can be very debilitating. It makes us feel overwhelmed and distracts us from getting our work done, and even worse - it promotes the formation of negative thoughts. Stress can hinder our productivity by making us more scattered and unfocused. We are unable to concentrate on one thing at a time because the cause of the stress is always in the back our minds, demanding attention.

Reducing the stressors in our lives will go a long way in allowing us to lead more productive and happy lives. Try to remember that some things are just not worth worrying about, and there is no sense in stressing over things we have no control over. Since much of our stress is the result of worrying about things beyond our control, allowing ourselves to let go of these thoughts can greatly reduce the stress in our lives.

Quiet the mind – Meditation is a great way to quiet our minds and develop clear thought processes. Try this exercise at least once a day: Find a quiet room with no interruptions, sit in a comfortable position, and close your eyes. Allow all thoughts to leave your mind, and try to focus on the silence within you. As thoughts begin to float through your mind, simply push them gently but firmly back out. This technique takes practice to perfect, but sticking with it will help you to develop intense focus that can be harnessed in other ways as well.

Meditating on a regular basis will ultimately improve our productivity because we will develop the ability to focus clearly on each task, and ultimately get more done in less time.

These are just a few of the easy ways we can contribute to a rested mind, which will help us to release stress, improve our focus, and increase our productivity.

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10 Things To Do Before The End Of The Year!

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sun, 08 Aug 2010 06:41:00 +0000

Here we are in August already - 7 months of the year already gone. I don't know about you but this year has been flying by for me and I realized there was only five months left to complete all my resolutions I made for this year.

I decided this weekend to take a look at how I've done and realized that I didn't do half bad with my resolutions. I still need to lose two pounds to hit my ideal weight. I painted the rooms I wanted to paint and my garden is doing awesome this year.

It hit me then that I still had time to accomplish a few more things before the year end and I hope that you join me and make some mid year resolutions. Here is what I plan to do and hope you choose some of these also.

1. Reconnect with an old friend or colleague. If you decide to do this, you will know who it is to contact. It will be the person who came to your mind as you read that sentence. Make the effort to call or contact them. But do more than just say hello. If they live close, get together for a meal or an evening. If they live further away, schedule time for a long, relaxed phone call. However you connect, make sure that you spend time on more than just “the good old days” and the old stories. Learn about what this person is doing, their goals and dreams. And see what you can do to help them achieve those things.

2. Spend one day in service to others. Volunteer your day to a service organization. Go to a nursing home. Rake the neighbor’s leaves. Use your professional skills in a pro bono way. It doesn’t matter what you do, just do it with a giving heart. Perhaps have a end of summer yard sale and donate the funds to charity.

3. Read one book you’ve wanted to read. If you are a big reader, you already have a stack to read. Pick one and commit to getting it read. If you read less and don’t have a book in mind, talk to someone you trust and admire and ask them for a suggestion. It doesn’t matter what the book is; pick it, and read it. Me I am re-reading one of my favorites.

4. Give someone a book that you have found personally valuable. Maybe it is the book you are now going to read. Maybe it is something you read in January, or maybe it is your favorite children’s book. Again, what the book is doesn’t matter, the joy comes in identifying a person who will enjoy and benefit from it the way that you did. When you give them the book, make sure you share with them why you are sharing it with them – it will mean so much to them. Each year I give a large stack of books to our local hospital and one of my favorite Senior Centers.

5. Make a list of the things you’ve learned this year. Hopefully it is a long list! Don’t try to do this all at one time. Give yourself a place to write and a couple of days to allow your mind to find these nuggets.

6. Identify the top five. Review the list you made from above and pull out the five that are most important to you. Write them down and think about why they are so valuable to you and how you can benefit from them today and in the future.

7. Make a list of the most fun things you have done this year. You will have fun making this list – and yes I do mean make a list!

8. Identify why they were the most fun so you can do more of it next year. This only makes sense. Once you have thought about your “most fun”, figure out how to get more of it into your life – whether it is an experience, time with specific people or whatever.

9. Commit to having another experience before December 31st that you could add to your “most fun” list. Too often fun gets sidelined, especially near the busy end of the year. Don’t let it happen. Make sure that you have some big fun before the end of the year.

10. Make a list of things you want to learn next year. Some things in life we learn serendipitously, and those are precious indeed. But we can also determine what we want to learn and why. Make some of those determinations now before you turn your calendar to the New Year and get a head start on learning.

Some of these are forward-looking tasks, some retrospective. That is intentional. It is important for us to consistently and regularly reflect, and of course when we look to the future we will see where we are going – and correct our course to get where we want to go.

These items may feel more personal than professional. Actually they are both. If you are reading this from a professional development perspective, I urge you to do these items.

These actions will be like magic in your life. Your life will be richer and more satisfying and you will be moving in the direction of your potential when you do these things.

Get stated now and have a wonderful rest of the year and as always have a confident and positive day.

JD
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An Effective Trick To Help You Not Take Things Personally

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 20:10:00 +0000

I think it would be fair to say that we all have a tendency to take things personally. It's just that some of us have a greater tendency than others to do so. And, when it happens, some of us are better able to deal with it within ourselves than others.

Taking things personally is never healthy in any relationship: employer-employee, friend-friend, husband-wife, partner-partner, parent-child, . . . for a number of reasons. One main such reason is that, if you do take things personally, then your feelings will continually be at the mercy of others - whether they attacked you personally or not. That is never healthy in a relationship, and it is no way to live!

If you are someone who tends to take things people say or do personally, then I want to share with you a little trick I have found that really helps. It involves understanding why people sometimes do what they do and seeing that often what they do has nothing to do with us and that, therefore, there is no need to take it personally. I will share this trick through 2 relationship principles.

Relationship Principle 1: People sometimes are selfish. This principle may sound cynical but bear with me.

I think that it is an undeniable fact that we all have selfish tendencies. However, some of us are more selfish than others. And some of us can become selfish given the right circumstances.

By understanding and accepting that people sometimes are selfish, then we understand that sometimes people:

- will think only in terms of what is best for them,
- will see things only from their own point of view,
- will want to be right about everything,
- will want to have things their way all the time,
- will not think about how what they do affects others,
- and so on . . .

Consequently, sometimes people will do what they do simply because they are motivated by selfishness! And if they are motivated by selfishness, then there is no reason why we should take personally things they do and say as their actions had nothing to do with us. In fact, you could say that their actions has shown you just how selfish they are.

For example, if someone cuts you when you are driving, don't take it personally. Just tell yourself, "this person has just shown me how selfish s/he is by cutting me off . . . it is nothing personal!"

Relationship Principle 2: People always have a reason for doing what they do. This principle is one that I learned about people some time ago.

This principle does not mean that people are always right about what they do. Nor does it mean that they should always be excused for their action. It also does not mean that they themselves always know why they did what they did. But there is nevertheless always a reason!

Here are some reasons that I can think of that would cause people to do what they sometimes do (perhaps you can think of others):

- past unmet needs,
- current needs,
- current wants,
- past unresolved issues or conflicts,
- past hurts,
- current fears,
- current hang ups,
- ulterior motives or hidden agenda,
- current insecurities,
- past decisions,
- ego issues,
- personality disorders such as: narcissistic tendencies, ADD, ADHD, lack of empathy, . . .
- and so on . . .

Consequently, sometimes people will do what they do simply because they are motivated by who they are and the "baggage" they carry! And if they are motivated by such things, then there is no reason why we should take personally things they do and say. In fact, you could say that their actions has shown you that they behave as they do because they "have issues". Again, nothing to do with us and therefore nothing personal!

For example, I know a 12-year old boy who once told his step-mother "I love you" only to be given the reply "Yeah, well you have a funny way of showing it!" Needless to say the boy was deeply hurt by the reply (and understandably so). The way to help that boy is to help him understand that, even though the step-mother's comment sounded like a personal attack on him, the reply really reveals who the step-mother is as a person and that it was nothing personal.

In conclusion, the trick to not taking personally things people say and do is to understand and accept that sometimes people are selfish and/or they "have issues", and that their behavior often has nothing to do with us. You can even turn things around and say that their behavior betrays who they really are. This will help you shift the focus from you (which is partly why you take things personally) and place it on them (which will help you not take things personally).

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!
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10 Easy Steps to a Healthy Lifestyle

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 19:33:00 +0000

I was visiting a friend the other day when he starts on about his health, what medicines his doctor has him on the restricted diet his doctor wants him to follow and how he needs to start exercising. Then comes the discussion of the high cost of his insurance and how much he has to spend on his prescriptions etc. He then asks me how many different prescriptions I had.

My friend was amazed when I told him that I used no medication, had no prescriptions and didn't have regularly scheduled doctor appointments. What shocked him the most was when he realized that I am six years older than he is.

Of course he wanted to know how that could be and what I did to stay so healthy. From that discussion I will share the 10 tips I gave my friend.

Following are ten things that you can do to promote optimal nutrition:

1. Watch what you eat. Your meals should consist of a healthy daily balance of foods. Knowing your nutritional needs and not eating too much or too little can lead to a more balanced lifestyle. This doesn't mean that I don't enjoy a good pizza now and then or a sweet tasty dessert. I just enjoy in moderation.

2. Sleep. When you are sleep-deprived, your body begins to shut down. Make sure that you feel rested from getting an adequate amount of sleep. This will allow your body to function at a consistent and optimal speed every day.

3. Take vitamins and supplements. Paying attention to where your diet feels lacking. Once you have determined this, you can compensate with vitamins and supplements. I personally use Centrum Silver as my daily vitamin and a glass or two of V8 to supplement my vegetable intake.

4. Exercise. You should exercise at least three to five times per week. Exercise helps your body to build muscle, lose weight and can help prevent illness and disease. Even walking daily will help improve your health and increase your stamina. Adopt a dog and take them on daily walks, a dog is a great motivator for getting out and walking!

5. Fight addictions. Avoid over or under eating, eat nutritionally balanced meals . Use alcohol and nicotine in moderation or stop using both. Over indulgence can easily disrupt your nutritional balance and cause serious problems. Having a glass of wine or beer daily may have it's health benefits but again enjoy in moderation.

6. Keep learning. There are several different definitions of improving health. Improving heath not only means diets, but there are holistic approaches that can be a part of your lifestyle. Keep researching and studying to determine what is and is not effective to help you in improving and maintaining your health. Continuous learning also keeps your mind healthy and keeps you feeling young.

7. Stay motivated. It is easy to begin working on improving our health and it is also easy to discontinue once we don’t see immediate results. A major aspect of improving your health is remaining consistent and motivated in your activities. It is important to make health care an every day priority. Set easily obtainable daily, weekly and monthly goals.

8. Get the right body measurements. Getting your body mass index taken, as well as finding where you need to focus your efforts in order to improve health can help you in staying motivated in improving your health.

9. Build a network. A network includes not only those that can provide information for you, but also support and assist you in building and maintaining health. I enjoy taking my dog along on my weekly hiking groups hikes.

10. Consult. There are a variety of health care providers and nutritionists that can help you. If you are uncertain about necessary steps to take, get in touch with the right person to determine what you need to do.

Choosing a healthy lifestyle can benefit you in several ways. It gives you a boost of energy and makes your body feel more in tune. It is important to identify ways you can improve your health. You can help yourself to live a more fulfilled life by consistently working towards improving your health. By knowing what you need to do and by following those steps, you can be assured that you will attain better nutrition and energy.

Have a confident and healthy day!

JD

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Finding Inner Peace

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 09:01:00 +0000

People with pessimistic attitudes go through their lives fighting their thoughts and emotions every day. If they are rejected for a job position, they feel that they are not good enough to have any job. They start to think that everyone believes they are stupid, and the cycle of pessimism traps them into psychological immobility. In fact, everyone experiences rejection at some time during their lives, but when your mind focuses on the negative aspects of a situation, it is hard to find inner peace.

The first step in finding inner peace is to think carefully about your goals. What are you trying to achieve, and what are you doing that will take you there? Can you realistically reach your goals, or are you setting goals that are far beyond your reach? Do you have any goals? By putting your priorities in order, you will be on the path to peace because only chaos can result from clutter and disorganization of the mind. You can start by setting small goals that can be easily achieved. Then, instead of focusing on failure, you can see the good job you’ve done in reaching your goal. If you fail to reach a goal, use this situation to learn how to do better next time. Don’t wallow in your failure.

When you feel good about yourself, you will have an easier time finding peace of mind. Peace is essential for happiness. If you constantly feel sad, you are living under a great weight that brings you down to a point where you could sink into a permanent state of self-pity. Self-pity only encourages negative thinking. Remember, you are not the only person facing rejection or hurt in life. There are other people much worse off than you are. People with negative thinking miss out on inner peace because they let every little setback throw them off track. They criticize themselves for no real reason and go down a road that only leads to misery.

Sometimes, hearing the word ‘no’ is a good thing. If you’ve lost out on a job, maybe that is for the best. What if you had been awarded a job position only to find out that it was not what you really wanted, or that you couldn’t do it as well as you thought? Of course, maybe you like being involved in situations that may lead you to harm. Maybe someone says ‘no’ to you to keep you from hurting yourself. Maybe they say ‘no’ because they love you.

Every life is full of rejection, so we would do well to turn our rejections into positive actions. Taking action can lead you to inner peace because activity makes you feel more positive about a situation. Positive attitudes result in peaceful states of mind. If you are feeling bad about yourself all the time, you need to break the cycle and get out of the habit of doing so. You can train your mind to think more positively. It will take work and effort, but it will lead you to inner peace, and this will be worthwhile.

Have a confident and positive day,

JD

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Qualities of a winner

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 07:04:00 +0000

Out of millions, comes one big winner and out of billions, comes a winner who overtakes every other winner in the world. Look at the history of the world, and you will always find few individuals during a certain period who were winners of that time. Lincoln, Gandhi, Churchill, Roosevelt, were all winners of their time. The question is not, who is the winner of a given time, but what makes a winner.

Who is a winner and what qualities are needed to make a winner?
Overcoming Obstacles

Winners come across same obstacles as everybody else. But they take them as challenges. An obstacle can be treated as a hurdle or something that challenges the mind to overcome it. Winners take them as challenges and rather than getting frustrated, thrive on obstacles. Every new obstacle makes them sharper and better, while a large majority surrenders in front of the same obstacles.

Focus

The winners have focus. Rather than giving away their energy to small ideas, they focus on the larger objective and work towards that. It is like walking on a road. The winner keeps walking, whereas other mortals try to explore smaller streets that connect to the road. Walk towards the goal.

Hard work

Winners are not afraid of hard work. To achieve their objective, they work ceaselessly. There is no word such as tiredness in their dictionary. The objective of working towards the goal gives them so much energy that the tiredness finds no place in their scheme of things.

These are some of the qualities that define a winner. Many other qualities add up to make a true winner in the millions. Why shouldn't all of us become winners?

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All Things are Possible

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 07:06:00 +0000

How do you choose to live?

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5 Fun & Easy Ways To Get Out Of The Rut

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 06:47:00 +0000

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I feel less than great. Low, grouchy, fed-up, and bored are all words you could use to describe what I’m like on those days and I’m probably not the best company. The thing is, days like those are part of the deal with being human – it’s not an elective. There will always be off days, and that’s okay.

But what happens when you get a whole string of those off-days, maybe lasting weeks, months or even years? Too many of us say that we’re in a rut, feel stuck, fed-up, or bored and admit that we don’t want things to be that way, but we don’t know what to do to change. That’s the problem, when you’re in a rut, you don’t have the energy or motivation to change things for the better, and it’s tough to find the insight or resources you need to make that jump.

Here are five fun and easy ways you can use right now to climb, or better yet, leap, out of the rut and start to get something better for yourself.

1. Do Something Differently
Life tends to run smoothly when we establish systems and routines for things, but the problem comes when things run too smoothly and we become blinded to any ideas or choices that sit outside of our routine. All the stuff we do every day becomes the norm, running on auto-pilot, and it becomes our whole world.

Start with making one or two simple changes to your day - be it at breakfast time, your radio station, gym routine, route to work, lunch routine, etc. Don’t worry about what the changes are or whether they’re right or wrong, just make a couple of simple choices that will serve you well.

Doing something differently or changing parts of your routine, instantly takes you out of the norm and allows you to shake off the things that make you feel confined. Step out of your routine and you’ll be in a position where you’re able to make different choices, see things differently and get a different result.

2. Use your Intuition

Your intuition is a powerful ally, and we all have it even though you might not recognize it. The dictionary says that intuition is:

1.a. The act or faculty of knowing or sensing without the use of rational processes; immediate cognition.

1.b. Knowledge gained by the use of this faculty; a perceptive insight.

2. A sense of something not evident or deducible; an impression.

One of the best friends you'll ever have in life is your intuition, and tuning in to it and learning to trust it is something that can have some truly remarkable effects. Accessing your intuition is a bit like working and developing a muscle, but unfortunately it can be harder to locate than a bicep or quadriceps, which tend to stay in the same place. Here are some quick tips for accessing and trusting it –

• Practice maintaining an open-minded, playful, experimental, non-judgmental attitude. This is the most fertile ground to tap into your intuition.

• Practice making wild guesses in your everyday life. Guess what a salesperson's name is, what a new person or place will look like or who's calling on the phone. Don't worry about getting it wrong, you're just working that muscle.

• Try a few simple observation exercises in your daily life. Whether you're in a restaurant, on a train, in a bar, or out shopping, practice noticing non-verbal behavior in others. Look for shifts in posture, eye movements, vocal tone or tempo, etc. Guess how they're feeling or what they're talking about.

3. Nourishment

Imagine you’re walking home from the supermarket with a couple of bags of groceries, but those bags have holes in them. You’re walking along merrily leaving a trail of your things behind you, but when you get home you unpack what’s left and ask, "Didn’t I have more than this?"

Nourishment is about plugging those holes in your life and making sure you have things that keep you feeling nourished – nourished in your head, nourished in your heart, and nourished in your stomach. Remember that you can’t give away what you don’t have, and can’t spend energy you’ve already spent.

It doesn’t have to be the big things in life that nourish you and it’s often the simplest little thing that strikes a chord, makes you feel like yourself again, or makes you smile from ear to ear – calling a friend, talking a walk in the park, or listening to your favorite song, for example. So what keeps you balanced? What relaxes you or makes you feel peaceful? What makes you feel like you again?

The fact is that you’re important enough to spend time taking care of yourself and it doesn’t matter what it is, just take the time to do it. If necessary, go as far as booking time in your diary. You’re the only one of you there is, so it’s your responsibility to make sure you’re okay.

4. Perfect Day

Here’s something to play with – your Perfect Day. This idea came to me a few years ago when a good friend suddenly asked me "What would be your perfect day?" I’d never been asked that before and I found myself spontaneously making up a story – telling her about my Perfect Day from the moment my eyes flickered open to the moment my head hit the pillow.

I went through each part of the day telling her what I was doing, who I was with, where we were, how it felt and what happened next. Bit by bit and without even thinking about it, I’d put together a rich, colorful, exciting, and comforting day, which still holds true as my Perfect Day. The best part is that you can start introducing little bits of your Perfect Day into your real life or working to make some of it happen. For example, in part of my Perfect Day I visit a company where I’m helping the directors and employees to focus on their strengths and to create a environment where people love to work and can be their best – and that was even before I knew that there was such a thing as coaching or that I could be a coach. My Perfect Day has now become like a good friend of mine whom I can call on whenever I want to.

So what’s your Perfect Day? Don’t think too much about it and don’t worry about it sounding silly or too grand. Just shoot from the hip and see what comes out naturally for you. Write down words, ideas, themes or a whole narrative – even draw pictures if you want to. Have fun with it, play with it – it’s your Perfect Day.

5. Get Some Fun, Fulfillment and Freedom

The Three F’s – Fun, Fulfillment, and Freedom - encompass a lot of what people are looking for in life, and also contain the solutions to having, doing and being those things. Here are some definitions,

Fun, n. - A source of enjoyment or pleasure; playful activity.

Ful-fil'ment, n. - To bring into actuality; to complete; a feeling of satisfaction at having achieved your desires.

Free-dom, n. - The capacity to exercise choice, free will; frankness or boldness; the absence of constraint in choice or action.

Read those again. Those things are huge, deep, and broad, and are a lot simpler than we make them.

Where are you in relation to each of the Three F’s? How much of each do you have right now? How much of each do you want? Whatever gap there is, recognize that it can be closed, and that you can close it. What would things be like if you were to close that gap? What would happen if you climbed a point or two on the Fun scale? What if you could add a point to your level of Fulfillment or Freedom? How would that feel? Pretty good, right? So what one thing can you do right now to help you get more?

By themselves each of the Three F's are a powerful thing, and can really help to move you forward, enjoy where you are, and feel alive. But when the Three F's come together . . .well, just hold on to your hat and keys.

Rut? What rut?""

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Steps to Building Your Self-Confidence

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 06:04:00 +0000

Accept yourself

The very first step in building self-confidence is to accept yourself in an unconditional way. You are human, therefore you are not perfect, so don’t dwell on what you see as flaws. Everyone has qualities that someone else does not. This is what makes us want to go out and find partners who give us love, and make us feel wanted and complete. Those great feelings would not be possible if you were perfect. Accept yourself how you are. It will help to rid you of constant stress and worry over things that you cannot control.

Do what you want!

How long it has been since you last did something that you really liked, something that you enjoyed doing as a child? How long has it been since you went out for ice cream with a friend? These simple things have the power to build your self-confidence and add fulfillment to your life. Life can be very quite simple. It is easy to get caught u in the rat race of today’s world, and lose yourself in the process. It is easy to forget your purpose, what you like and what you enjoy doing. It happens to people all of the time. It is your responsibility to yourself that you get back to those simple things in life.

Find a group of friends

You’ve heard the saying, “birds of a feather flock together”. It is important to find people with whom you enjoy spending time and doing things. You will find that life is a little bit easier when you are among the people who share your interests and your feelings. There is an understanding between you, as well as an open dialogue. Good conversation and friendship are healthy and important for our minds and souls.

Set goals and just do it!

Take one step at a time. Those single steps will develop into a giant gait over time. Do not overwhelm yourself, but simply do the task at hand. But set achievable goals and go for them! Don’t focus on the big picture, concentrate on the small steps. This is the only way to accomplish anything, and to avoid procrastination and depression. Even the smallest achievement will give you a sense of accomplishment that will boost your self-confidence.

Have a great weekend!

JD

5 Simple Steps to Controlling Your Anger

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 07:22:00 +0000

How many times have you lost control of yourself when you're angry? Did you do or said something which you regretted over time?

I guess we all did. It's normal, and after all, we are just human beings.

Everyone of us faces problems with anger. The main difference between you and me is that, do you know how to gain control of your anger, instead of letting it control you.

It's not easy to gain control of your anger, especially when you are provoked into such situations. Nevertheless, if you are facing with this situation next time, you can try out my 5 simple steps.

Step 1 : Identify what makes you upset

Start with identifying what upsets your feelings or emotions. Pull yourself aside from everything you are doing or the anger situation you are in, then take a deep breathe and clear your mind. Think, what brought you into this situation.

You need to know what is wrong in order to correct it. Right?

Step 2 : Use them as a stop signal

When you are done with Step 1, you'd probably already knew what made you angry. You might not have the complete clear idea of it, but it's OK. At least you have "some" ideas.

Use these as stop signs for your anger. You're upset because the little voices inside your head are telling yourself upsetting things. This in return causes a stir in your feelings, therefore resulting in anger.

Stop all these little voices from talking within yourself, and you'll be able to think independantly and not being influenced by them and the situation.

Step 3 : Tell yourself positive things

It's important to think positive. You can counteract your upsetting thoughts with framing your mind to have a positive self-message. Tell yourself something nice that will make you feel better.

For instance, "this anger feeling is only temporary and I don't want to say or do something stupid which I will regret for my actions later."

Put the brakes on your feelings. Tell yourself to slow down and take it easy.

Step 4 : Make yourself clear

Clarify the situation for yourself. Ask yourself, “What is really going on in this situation?"

You can then feel disappointed with the situation but not enraged at the people who are creating it.

Step 5 : Think of constructive goals

Try to set more realistic goals for yourself in regard to the problem situation that you are in.

Ask yourself, “What are the alternative solutions that I use to resolve this situation?"

Be specific as possible, and concrete.

"What can you do to change this situation?"

List out the constructive options that you have in mind in which to reach your goals.

Ask yourself, "What constructive actions can I take to reach my goals?"

Finally, choose a constructive option to reach your goal and act fast on it.

The 5 simple steps that I had just pointed out to you are exactly what I do whenever I face with anger situations. You can try them out when you face with such situations.

Everyone gets angry at times, but the important thing is, "What can you do to overcome this situation?".

Gain control of your anger, rather than letting it control you.

Stop The Anger Once and For All!

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3 Simple Winning Strategies

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 07:15:00 +0000

Life is full of ups and downs and sometimes has a few sideways thrown in too. When things go wrong or don’t go as planned, or when something happens to throw us off balance and doubt ourselves it can be tough to deal with. After all, we all want things to go well and to end up as ‘winners’. But life will always throw challenges at us, and we can’t control everything. Nor should we try. It’s not what happens to you but what you do with what happens to you that makes the difference. Here are three easy ways that you can always come out on top.

1. Focus on Your Strengths

We’re a bunch of contradictions – sorry to break it to you. Sometimes happy, sometimes sad; sometimes hopeful, sometimes pessimistic; sometimes childish and sometimes mature. We also have a whole load of strengths and weaknesses that affect what we do and how we do it, but tend to put more focus on our weaknesses and not our strengths.

A strength is something that you do consistently well or at a near-perfect level of performance – it’s something you’re just able to do, you’re hard-wired to do it well and you get an inherent satisfaction from doing it. It could be tackling and solving complex problems, empathizing with people, having a lively imagination or being able to make the perfect omelet.

Focusing on what you do well rather than what you’re not so good at makes all kinds of sense. When you look at what you’re not good at you feel bad about yourself and your ability, but when you focus on and play to your strengths you’re guaranteed to get results, and can even eliminate any negative effect your weaknesses might have.

2. Set Things Up Ahead Of Time

Sure, there will be times when you can just head into something, do brilliantly at it and get the result you were hoping for (normally if you’re playing to your strengths), but other times you might blunder forwards, wing it and not get the result you wanted. Whatever challenges or opportunities you’re facing you’ll stand a much better chance of getting a great result if you set things up to succeed ahead of time.

So what exactly do you want to happen? What solution, outcome or result would be great? Get really clear on the outcome you want from what’s facing you and how it would feel to get the outcome you’re looking for. Then start breaking it down – what can you do to set things up so that your desired outcome happens? What needs to be put in place? What will help to make what you want to happen, happen? And to ensure the best outcome, what are you willing to do?

Whatever faces you, it’s possible to get the result you want by being crystal clear about the kind of result you want and by putting effort into setting things up so that it happens. Look at this way – you’re infinitely more likely to get your most wanted result by putting time or effort into setting things up ahead of time than if you don’t. Your choice.

3. There’s No Such Thing as Losing Anyway

What’s life all about, really? Getting a good job, getting married, feeling valued, having fun? It’s about different things to different people, but to boil it down I think it’s about doing the best we can to have, do and be the best for ourselves and those we care about. Sometimes it’s a struggle and sometimes it’s a joy, but what is constant through it all is our capacity to learn, develop and grow. Humans have an unparalleled ability to learn and adapt, which is exactly why we’re able to do the best we can and find ways to have, do and be more.

That’s why everything you do takes you one step forwards and it’s only by doing one thing, then another and another that the most astounding things in our world came about. As Thomas Edison said while he was on his 207th prototype for the electric light bulb - 'I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.' He's absolutely right – everything you do that doesn’t work out is another tick in another box and another step forwards, because you know one more way not to do something and what not to do next time. You’ll never get to 100% without going from 1% to 99% first.

In all that you do, whether it turns out how you wanted it to or not, there’s the capacity for learning. That means that it’s all part of the process and everything that you do and learn is an important step forwards.

There’s no such thing as losing, only learning and growing. So here’s to your continued success!"

Have a positive and confident day,

Ten Clear Thinking Techniques And Tips

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 18:13:00 +0000

Does your mind sometimes feel like a television station you can't quite tune in? You know there's an interesting program on - or several, but everything is mixed with static. What if you could "tune in" at will, have clear thinking whenever you want it? Try some of the following.

Ten Clear Thinking Techniques And Tips

1. Take a walk. Science will eventually prove this to be a great way to improve the quality of your thinking, but don't wait for the proof. Aren't there enough other reasons to take a walk anyhow?

2. Stay away from sugar. If you want to understand what brain fog is, eat a sugary donut on an empty stomach, then do math problems twenty minutes later. What you will experience, along with the "sugar blues," is brain fog. At least lay off sugar and simple carbohydrates when you need to think clearly.

3. Organized space means clear thinking. It's rare that a person can actually work better in clutter. Organized working space means you won't have the thought "where is that..." distracting your mind.

4. Get better sleep. Sleep requirements vary, but the minimum for most is somewhere around five hours. Some suffer if they sleep less than eight hours. The research, however, indicates that after a certain minimum quantity, the quality of sleep is more important to normal brain function.

5. Try meditating. No time? Just close your eyes, relax, and watch your breath for a while. Accept that your mind will wander, but continually return your attention to your breath. Five minutes of this, and afterwards you'll feel a boost in your brainpower.

6. Resolve your "mind irritations." Watch your busy brain. Maybe a call you need to make has been bothering you, just below consciousness. Find these stressors, and do something to let them go. For example, make that call, or put it on a list, and your mind will let go of it for now. Just seeing a problem and saying, "There's nothing I can do about this until Friday," will often stop unconscious worrying.

7. Don't drink alcohol. At least don't drink too much. While moderate amounts can be conducive to creative thinking, all the evidence says that it is bad for the long-term health of your brain.

8. Make decisions quickly. Nothing gets in the way of clear thinking like a dozen decisions hanging around unmade. If nothing else, decide when you'll make the decision.

9. Get some fresh air. Go outside and breath deeply through your nose. You'll get a good dose of oxygen to your brain, and the change of surroundings can help clear your mind.

10. Satisfy your physical needs. Clear thinking is easier if you aren't too hungry, thirsty, or hot.

You can think more clearly starting today. There are certainly more than ten ways, but you really only need to make a few of them a habit to have a more powerful brain. Why not try one or two right now?

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Happiness Quotes!

noreply@blogger.com (JD Marshall) — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 07:49:00 +0000

Here are some happiness quotes to kick off the weekend with. May you all have a happy and joyful weekend!

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.
Groucho Marx

The amount of happiness that you have depends on the amount of freedom you have in your heart.
Thich Nhat Hanh

Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Happiness is never stopping to think if you are.
Palmer Sondreal

Nobody really cares if you're miserable, so you might as well be happy.
Cynthia Nelms

Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open.
John Barrymore

Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.
Margaret Young (one of my all time personal favorites, jd)

We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.
Frederick Keonig

The best vitamin to be a happy person is B1.
Author Unknown

Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Abraham Lincoln

Have a happy one!
br /> The Little Manual of Happiness – 7 Simple Steps to a Joyful Life
JD

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